The Luke and Pete Show - A free lickable treat

Episode Date: August 10, 2020

Pete’s been putting alcohol spray on his shoes, Luke’s been having Zoom mishaps and we’re all just too damn hot. We also talk about Toshiba, flying, wrestling and snooker!So put your feet up, crack open a Tyskie and tuck into a double Snickers!Get in touch at [e-mail]! **Please rate and review us on Apple or wherever you get your podcasts. It means a lot and makes it easy for other people to find us. Thank you!** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Luke and Pete show. My name is Pete Donaldson. I'm that part of that particular circle. The other half of the circle. Pac-Man's back of his head. It's Mr. Luke Mill. You alright, man? It's a two-man circle.

It's the squared circle as wrestling parlance goes. I already know the answer this one um have you got your top off right now to me i'm finding it a little bit um cool in uh south london at the moment it's merely 32.5 degrees celsius in my room so if anything it could be done with being ramped up a little bit i'll apologize to listeners in advance um hopefully they won't mind too much they are the most important thing of all this but hopefully they won't mind too much when i say that you are occasionally going to hear a cargo pass behind me a bird tweet perhaps even a conversation on the street outside because there is absolutely the square root of zero chance of me recording this show

today in this heat with the window shut it's not happening people take it as you find it or don't bother fucking listening because i'm at my wits end already and that's uh that's my heart final that's your final word on the whole situation it is ridiculous and also it's uh i i find that um we're always very conscious about what we can hear but i think we always kind of overestimate what our muggy little usb microphones actually pick up um we always can like kind of hear things going on from outside and stuff i that said though i was recording um the abroad in japan podcast one of our finds to kind of stable output. And I was in a situation where I was talking to Chris

who's in Japan, and I forgot to mute my microphone. There was a weird setup where I was recording. Do you remember when I did that in that meeting? Yes, I do. Yeah, we were in a Zoom call with some

clients, and from out of nowhere, Luke shouted. Someone was trying to explain a very specific point, a very technical point. And then, Luke, what was the thing that you sort of... So what actually happened was I was multitasking on a Zoom call, as you said, with me, you, our colleague John, and a potential client who luckily you and I know so it wasn't so bad i thought i was on mute while someone was talking away and i took a delivery of a new cat water fountain right yeah and so i was unpackaging it

thinking i was on mute and then my wife said what's that you've got with it and i shouted quite loudly across the room it's a free lickable treat it's a free all i heard was there was a a soul-destroying gut-wrenching two or three seconds of silence before one of you just went you're all right luke oh my god so it can happen it can happen carry on though so what did you do with Chris? What happened with Chris? I think this was on the recording. I accidentally... Well, I didn't accidentally. I sprayed alcohol spray into my own shoes.

We've got this sprayable alcohol kind of stuff. And I sprayed it into my shoes because like that'll make them stop smelling like old shoes yeah um old feet um it doesn't it just makes your shoes really cold and wet which i quite like it gets me off but um yeah i spread it in there and and i'm fairly certain that ended up on the um in the show itself. So no doubt people... I'll find out about it in a couple of days' time. People saying, what was that noise 40 minutes in? And the actual truth is I think I was spraying alcohol spray into my own shoes because they were yucking up a bit.

Yeah. So there you go. Were you sort of multitasking? Why weren't you listening to what Chris was saying? I was listening to... That's the thing. I was listening to what... I was using wireless headphones so I could hear what i was doing but at that point

he was in mid monologue so i was just having a i was doing i was doing other things as we all do lickable cat treats are low lickable cat treats what's your um what else has been floating your boat this week donny what's the uh what's the latest news latest news? I'm just trying to keep cool. Look, it's been a horrific time. I spent the entirety, I think, of Friday night just trying to get my life together again, to be quite frank. We've had a busy couple of weeks, and Friday I was just alone by myself

with my thoughts. I found a can of Stella behind a gas meter in my house and that got me excited about the idea of lager. So I went out and bought myself four cans of Tisky. That's how you're getting your life back together, is it? That's me getting my life back together. Walking to the shop on your own buying four cans of Tisky.

What was it like before? And let me tell you, if you're asking the question, Pete, did you have any food? Yes, did i had a double snickers so a double snickers and four cans of tisky were you in a gas room behind the to be honest the street that i live on is so it's just it's become completely uh what do you call it completely unpedestrianized so right it's like this beautiful kind of like French kind of little side streets, kind of like cafe culture. Even the fish shop below us has got all of these chairs outside. It's brilliant.

If you want to try and get asleep at any point, it's completely impossible. If you kind of want to have to, if you want to pick up a taxi on your street, it's impossible. Or live your life, it's impossible. They've literally made my life ten times harder than I thought it was before, which is good. And it's really hot as well. It's just really, really...

It must be hellishly hot in the middle of Soho in this kind of temperature. It is unbelievably hot. And my flat is so dusty. And I'm just going to... Look, don't tell anyone. anyone actually i won't say that just in case there is a terrible fire but what if i just set fire to my house i'm just bored of it now the temperature could get so high it could just spontaneously combust but p i think i think if i could if i could develop in a petri dish how to maximize the heat in one property here's what

i'd do i'd probably put it right in the center of one of the most notoriously concrete cities in the world i would then put it up high as possible so that heat would rise to make it hotter i then probably put it above some kind of restaurant and then deep fat fries in it yeah and. And then I would probably give it very, very poor ventilation. Now, how many of those boxes are you ticking at the moment? Can I add also in the the fish, the extractor fans for all of the hot frying oil machines does kind of come to the back of my house. So when I open the back windows, not only do I get the delicious smell of fish-flavoured oily detritus, I just also get like a wall of heat going up. It's a fascinating little kind of accoutrement to my life.

It really is. It sounds obscene. It's obscene. That's the thing. It is obscene. But I love it. I've got a couple of bits of news that will be relevant to you particularly one of them peter did you see this is about toshiba not making

laptops anymore it is after is it i don't know wow that's amazing basically i i this show has made me look at pieces of news that i would previously have never battled an eyelid at and i saw toshiba shuts the lid on laptops after 35 years, made a note of that and thought, Pete Donaldson will be all over that and he'll probably have a pretty hot take. I think it's sad because obviously, you know, back in the day, they were the ones that kind of,

they made some lovely laptops back in the day. They made the very first one, didn't they? Or one of the first ones? They made one of the very first ones, yeah. They made the very first one, didn't they? Or one of the first ones? They made one of the very first ones, yeah, one of the very first ones. Floppy disk powered and all that. But, yeah, it used to, I think they sold a lot of their stuff off a couple of years ago to Sharp or Sony or something like that. But, yeah, incredible.

I can't believe the Toshiba laptop journey is over. Well, apparently the situation in that kind of part of the business world is that unless you've got a really big scale, cheap operation, or you've got a really premium brand, you're really struggling. And if you're caught in the middle like Toshiba were, it's curtains for you. Not sure why, but that's apparently the reason. Indeed. Well, here at Testacarn, we've always loved their tellies,

but they've given up on the old laptop game, which is very exciting. Oh, yeah. Toshiba Telly has been very, very supportive of our products down the years, and we long may that continue. Shout out Toshiba Dave. Yeah, Toshiba Dave. We've got one in the Stakhanov office. Another headline that caught my eye this week was

just said, Nicola Sturgeon, sorry over Scottish exam results. Are you just on the BBC front page? I understand. Is this what we've got to? Just you on the front? Because I can see it. Sturgeon sorry off Scottish exam results.

Toshiba shuts the lid on laptops after 35 years. And the World Health Organization are calling to suppress, suppress, suppress virus. How are they doing this? Peter, the Nicola Sturgeon story is funny, though, because the way they've headlined it and photographed it, it looks like she's saying sorry for failing some exams, even though she's a woman who thinks in her 50s.

So it's like, hey, you should have taken them ages ago, first and foremost. You should have taken them before you became First Minister of Scotland. Do you reckon they've only just found out that you didn't pass any other GCSEs, even though it was in their record of achievement? Take them now,

and no one will notice, but do not fail them. Do not fail us at all. Do you reckon you could pass a GCSE now? Oh, God, no. God, no. Do you remember how... My GCSEs were just constant.

It's not training for remembering anything. It's training for an exam. And not being able to do an exam, not having had to have done an exam in the last 20 years, well, 10 years, I just don't think I have the kind of wherewithal to do it. Because I remember my GCSEs, and to a lesser extent, my. Because I remember my disease and to a lesser extent my A-levels and certainly to a lesser extent my university courses.

You ran out of time. You just kind of wrote down bullet point everything you knew. It was just a memory test, wasn't it, really? It was not analytical thinking to be happening in the actual exam. It depends what subject you do, though. I guess so, but still it's like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. There's an intersection between learning and memory of facts, right?

Because if you want to be a doctor, I mean, fair enough, you've got to be able to use your intuition, you've got to learn, you've got to be clever, but you've also got to remember which one the fucking liver is. You need some facts as well. Yeah, they're the basics. But I would say that in anything like um in like english and history you're always like you would have um you would learn about the peterloo massacre or the corn laws or benjamin disraeli and the work in afghanistan etc um and you would and you would learn five or six different test questions you

know but and they'd always be kind of the same sort of thing it would never be a curveball and And you would learn five or six different test questions, you know, and they'd always be kind of the same sort of thing. It would never be a curveball. And if you hadn't bloody listened in class, you would never bloody know what was going to be happening in the exams. But they would never, like, you know, talk about, you know, Benjamin Disraeli's dress sense. It wouldn't be completely accurate, would it? Why is that coming up?

Why would that be of use? Is that because what's what you model your look on now? Well, no, because I've scrolled down to the entertainment news on the BBC website and Kamala from the WWE has died 70 years young. Yeah, I, for one, am hugely surprised that he wasn't actually from Uganda. With a name like James Morris or whatever he was called. The WWE have an incredible reputation of... Explain to our listeners what you Kamala was,

because they might not be wrestling fans. Kamala was a man from the south... Illinois or something. Yeah, he was from Illinois. And he was, I believe, billed as being from Uganda. And I think he was dressed as effectively a jungle savage. Not very progressive. Weirdly, wrestling back in the 80s and the 90s, early 90s,

they had a reputation of being not very progressive in their character work. But there were very few black, and I'm going to say athletes, because he doesn't necessarily look like an athlete. He's a big, gigantic fat man, athlete, who you would have these African-American guys who would be headlining 10,000, 20,000 shows, bringing in tickets from miles around, being know, being big, big build stars. And yet they'd be dressed up like so-called African savages.

Not very progressive when you look back, but weirdly, there were no other black artists getting that amount of work in the Deep South at that point in the 80s. It's a really, really strange kind of situation. Reprehensible when you look on the BBC website, the image of Kamala, and especially because he lost both of his legs like 10, 15 years ago. Oh, I heard about that.

It was diabetes or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he's been on his way out for a little while, but I think this was actually COVID-related. Incredible, really. But he was a very... It's weird to be inspirational uh as a person who kind of broke down barriers when you are dressed like that because you've given this horrifically racist gimmick and i think

something you haven't mentioned there pete which is actually i think is also really important i just checked and he was actually from mississippi not from illinois but right i think i think what i've um what i would add to that is just that Kamala comes, that character comes into the wrestling in about 1992, as far as I remember. And I was 10, 11 years old then. And without being, I mean, these are kids watching this whole thing. So you don't kind of question it.

His whole conceit was that he couldn't speak any English and he couldn't understand the rules. And he was essentially, as you've already said, a savage. Which looking back on it, he's absolutely horrific. rules. And he was essentially, as you've already said, a savage, which looking back on it is absolutely horrific. But as an impressionable kid, you don't question it because you're a kid. So it's actually very damaging.

Oh, yeah, massively, massively. And this sort of thing went on forever. And especially where you'd get these kind of physically imposing characters like characters like i don't know the great carly the indian policeman um who who couldn't really wrestle but he was like seven foot three and big massive guy um and he couldn't well i think he i think he chose sometimes to speak as much english as he needed to if he ever needed to lose uh he couldn't speak english but if he was ever asked to win he could definitely speak english then apparently amusingly uh but yeah if they if wrestlers aren't good talkers they'll get given a manager who'll do the speaking for them that's right so obviously kamala was kamala was one of those characters but he was harvey whippleman i think yeah so so yeah yeah

he'd been given a few but he was a guy who who broke down a lot of barriers but obviously um yeah you look at that picture in uh in 2020 and just go my fucking christ how did anybody get away with that bullshit yeah exactly roddy roddy piper roddy roddy piper half blacked up at wrestlemania so half of his body was black half of his body was white uh and that was all right in the 90s i want to say weird weird entertainment weird uh it's the world's greatest sport um apparently so wrestle me in the 90s, I want to say. Weird. Weird entertainment. Weird. It's the world's greatest sport, apparently. So WrestleMe.com if you want to check that bollocks out. Pete, can I just move us from one pugilistic sport to another?

Obviously, we're in the middle of the World Snooker Championships at the moment. I know you're not really a big snooker guy, but I'm a huge fan of the sport. And something that came up yesterday which many people would have seen but if they if they haven't it's definitely bear it definitely bears repeating and i don't think you'd have seen it so last night ronnie o'sullivan who is the enfant terribler of the sport and has been one of the world's best players for yeah getting on for 27 28 years now

um five times world champion um still in the tournament as we record this this year um in fact i think he yeah i think he's five times champion anyway so he's very well known Five times world champion, still in the tournament as we record this this year. In fact, I think he's five times champion. Anyway, so he's very well known for not really giving a shit about anything. And he regularly comes out with quite off-brand, off-message comments about the sport, right? And last night, he was interviewed after beating Ding Junhui, who is a very, very talented and highly ranked Chinese player. Some would say the best player to never win the World Championships,

but Ronnie O'Sullivan beat him yesterday. And in the interview afterwards, he was asked just general post-match questions. And one of the questions was, do you think it's strange? And did you ever think that you could still be playing at such a high level so many years on from when you made your debut, I think as a 17-year-old, like 1992 or whatever? And he just goes, not really. I'll tell you what, you see some of these players coming through now, they're absolutely rubbish.

They are awful. Honestly, they couldn't even be good quality amateurs and i sometimes sit there thinking bloody hell i'd have to lose an arm and a leg to drop out of the top 50 here um and with the interview ego interviewer going come on the standard's not that bad everyone goes on the sofa goes, it is, and just walks off. I don't like him very much, but he's the best player and he has every right to say that

because there's clearly something going on there. Is there a kernel of truth in this? Yeah, I think he's just so entertaining. He's just got no filter. He doesn't,

I don't think he's been, for some reason, he went a whole season doing every single post-match interview in an Australian accent for no reason. But I think he just gets, I think he's got a very chaotic mind.

He just gets bored. Yeah. And the base is where he finds his control and his order. The base. The base, Pete. What do you think base is made of? Was it base? order. And the bays, Pete. What do you think bays is made of? Was it bays?

What did I say? No, it is bays. You're right. I just wondered if you knew what it was made of. Just felt, isn't it? Felt and glue. I think it's just a... Yeah, I think it's just a...

I think it's... Isn't it specifically green, though? I don't know. What do you mean? Felt's all kinds of different colours. But does it have to be green to be bays? Oh, no. Oh, I don't know. What do you mean? Felt's all kinds of different colours. But does it have to be green to be beige? Oh, no. Oh, I don't know.

Oh, I don't know. I don't know what beige is, to be honest. That's interesting. We had a couple of emails about colour, actually. We'll take a short break and we'll be back to talk beige. Yeah, do a break, mate, because I was just letting the cat in. Sorry about that. All right.

And we're back. And welcome to the second half of the Luke Peake Show. We are still sweating our testicles off. It is hotter than Los Angeles right now in London and beyond. I hope you're keeping well wherever you are choosing to spend your time. We've had loads of emails in and loads we didn't get to last week. Luke, do you want to kick us off with one? Have you got one in your grubby little mitts? We've got loads of emails in and loads we didn't get to uh last week luke do you want to kick us off with one have you got one in your grubby little mitts we've got loads of emails

from um i'll tell you what the profession that is listened to sorry the profession that makes up the biggest percentage of our listeners appears to be pilots it's incredible how many pilots listen to our show i love it because it's like they've got such important scary jobs um i was listening to uh somebody i know on a podcast um the new microsoft flight simulator has come out and it's the most um advanced flight simulator ever it uses um um like bing sort of google maps powered um google earth kind of technology. I'm not getting a plane powered by Bing. Simple as that. All of this amazing satellite data streamed in through the clouds.

So you can be obviously flying through the skies and everything's so accurate. And it contains the sort of definition and data that you couldn't have on like a DVD drive. It wouldn't fit on your PlayStation. It wouldn't fit on your Xbox. It wouldn't fit on your hard drive. It has to be served up like some hot geographical soup from the servers of Microsoft.

So this flight simulator is really, really technically advanced. technically advanced. Anyway, some bloke who works for a games company uploaded a couple of videos of him flying from Los Angeles to Las Vegas. And a couple of... Everyone on YouTube is obviously a fucking expert and everything. You got this wrong, you got this wrong.

Why are you shit flying a fucking 747? What's wrong with you? Et cetera. Because he's not a fucking pilot would be the first fucking clue. And B, it's a video game. So it's a simulation, but a very, very technically adept one.

And he's up there and a pilot really sort of helped me. Sort of like, look, don't worry about the landing. Just worry about getting up there. You're new to this. I just like the idea that pilots kind of like looking at people playing Microsoft Flight Simulator and going,

look, don't you worry. They're just really calm and nice. Take it one step at a time. I was a little bit worried actually because we had some emails. I also read the emails, so look at me doing my prep. And there was a lot of emails from a lot of pilots, or a few pilots at least. And then I noticed on the self-saved bbc

website where we seem to be gleaning all of our stories from this afternoon there was a plane in trouble a jet to kind of um test flight happening around manchester and i think one of the engines experienced uh engine failure so it managed to land in the end but because of the um kind of movable feast that is uh internet news you're not really sure when things have sort of happened. Is this live? Is there going to be a crash plane here? Oh, God. Let's not talk about planes, but I think we're all right.

It landed in Manchester. We're fine. Do you reckon the pilots, they practice the voice they do? As in? If you read the right stuff, wolf's the right stuff he talks about chuck yeager is the first guy to to fly i think faster than the speed of sound or whatever i can't really remember but he's got a couple of speed records or whatever i think he's still alive actually chuck i think it might be on twitter he'd be in his 90s now he's got a great video game

right okay and so here apparently all the all the pilot kind of style of delivering over the public address system on the plane comes originally from Chuck. He had a very calm, kind of soothing voice, and everyone's kind of mimicking him. It's become a style, right? So you know when they come over the thing and they go, oh, very warm welcome aboard this British Airways flight. They speak like that, right?

I wonder whether they have to go to some kind of class to practice it because you very rarely hear um and them doing it in any different kind of style and with the exception of the one thing i told you about before pete i've told you this story before i'm not sure if i've told our listeners about a friend of mine who was flying um way way back in the day was flying from Brisbane, I think, or possibly Perth to Sydney. Have I told you that story? Yes, you have, yeah. Yeah, everything was just so Australian. He said he's sitting in the plane in the seat with his seatbelt

that I'm waiting to take off. And the pilot comes over, the Tannoy Australian pilot, and just goes, G'day, everyone. We're going to Sydney. And he was like, that sounds like someone has broken into the cockpit. That does not sound like. Are you all forgetting we're in Sydney? Everyone's just so informal, even the pilot on the plane.

He's got to understand that it's a responsible job. He needs to make people feel at ease. Well, on the same podcast, I was sort of saying, and so we go from BBC website to stealing content from other people's podcasts. They start every sentence with we're going to be good and with an um.

They start every sentence with an um and you kind of want your pilot to be a bit more secure and a bit more deliberate with his words. Yeah. They also hand over,

don't they? They kind of say and flying us to Boston this afternoon will be first officer blah, blah, blah, and he'll be carrying you through, and you'll hear from him later on the journey. It's like, don't you tell me the division of labor here. I don't want to.

If anything, mate, you sound like you're absolving yourself of responsibility if anything goes wrong. So just stick to the basics. Let us know what time we're getting there. Let us know if there's going to be any turbulence. I don't want you kind of deferring or delegating to someone else in case it goes to shit. You're in charge, so take charge.

There's a man on the Watford to London Euston line that does little quizzes in the morning. Tedious. Leave me alone. You know what? You know what? You know what? I would usually have a problem with it, but he does it with such a light touch,

I'm on board. I think it's decent. He does little kind of reminders about what date it is, like if it's Eid or I think last Monday it was Jamaica Day or something. It was like, or Jamaican Independence Day anyway. I don't think there's it was Jamaica Day or something. So it was like, or Jamaican Independence Day anyway. I don't think there's just a Jamaica Day. But yeah, I don't mind him.

I'd usually find that something rather tedious, like he's trying to advertise himself for other work. But I quite enjoyed his work. The reason I find it tedious, Pete, chiefly because I'm listening to music normally or a podcast on the tube, and I only take my earphones out if I hear the driver saying something in case it's a diversion or i've got to do something different yeah and if he's just doing

inanity i don't which is ironic given what i do for a job i know i don't want to hear it um anyway listen we did promise a uh an email back in the single email 15 minutes ago um and this is from harry who says um hi chaps long time listenertime emailer. I am one of your many pilot listeners. Hello to you, Pilot Harry, who is indeed talking to their union reps in a futile attempt to save my livelihood. Thanks very much, Pete. Here's a bit more info on the aircraft storage debate, which is a debate we had last week, if you are listening to this

and haven't heard that. The Mojave Desert, among others, has long been used for aircraft scrapping and pre-COVID was also being used to store the ill-fated Boeing 737 MAX, which Harry adds, I have also flown. Tell us about that, Harry. Don't leave that in parentheses. It's very binary whether you enjoyed that flight, I think. It ends one way or the other, and most of them ended the other way, And the numbers across... It's very binary whether you enjoyed that flight, I think. Oh, this is...

It ends one way or the other, and most of them ended the other way, which is good. Positive. The one thing I remember reading from that story, which I found absolutely phenomenal about the Boeing 737 MAX, was that some airlines hadn't, in quotes, hadn't paid for the extra software upgrades. I mean, for fuck's sake.

I mean, listen, this is more important than that. This is more important than an add-on deluxe CD box set. Listen, Kanye West was caught pirating software on his Instagram. Look, even he, in his divine wisdom back in the day when he was producing stuff, doesn't mind downloading the odd illegal plug-in. So there we go. There we go.

Harry continues, the numerous aircraft currently being stored are being kept in long-term storage which requires a various weekly bi-weekly monthly bi-monthly 90 day and six month service cycles apart from checking that various essential electrical flight control and hydraulic systems are still operating one of the major problems of long-term storage is moisture and microorganism accumulation in the fuel tanks, as well as surface corrosion and rust, hence them being stored in dry climates and top up the biocide and any remaining fuel. The whole procedure is a total pain in the ass, as aircraft are obviously never designed to be grounded for this length of time, and the maintenance cost will be huge. Another benefit of being in the desert is the low risk of wildlife making home in the various gaps and holes in the aircraft.

Birds nesting in the wheel well bay is a common one. Lastly, Pete was spot on. You would indeed place those fall covers you sometimes see in cars to reflect the sun because the flight deck would otherwise become an oven and this also protects a large number of screens and instruments too. Sorry if the above is long-winded,

but I reckon it's about the right length to read while Pete chows down on a pot noodle. Take care, Pilot Harry. I can't... This is stressing me the fuck out. To keep a plane out of action just seems to be more expensive than actually running a plane. Why not fly it constantly and just have it fueled in midair?

Just do shifts. than actually running a plane. Why not fly it constantly and just have it fueled in midair? Fly it constantly, yeah. Just do shifts. Have like hotels in the sky. Well, I mean, it would keep seven people in decent accommodation, five-star accommodation in the air. I like the idea of biocide being added to fuel. Yeah, what is that? What's that all about? It sounds like something to kill bugs in fuel. I don't know. You don't want anything kind of growing in fuel. Yeah, what is that? What's that all about? It sounds, I mean, it sounds like something to kill bugs in fuel.

I don't know. You don't want anything kind of growing in fuel. Because I think I spoke about my, I was using Swafiga to hwash myself in my shower. Yeah, depressing. Don't go into it again. So I'd run out of shower. Yeah, I took the lid off and it started to fur up.

It started to kind of look like a petri dish growing things as soon as you put the lid back on the um the the cleaning properties of the actual cleaning um cleaning mulch itself starts to kill all the bugs again and then and then you're back to square one fascinating huh so it's only the oxygen that's actually giving them life looks like it yeah and then as soon as you cut off the oxygen supply, the rest of the swarfig says, hey, we'll have none of that air. We are literally a cleaning fluid.

Leave us to our jobs. Get the hell out of here. You're making us look bad. How long will the swarfig last, do you think, before you have to move on to another cleaning product? Well, I'm not going to use it on my privates. I'm not going to keep using it on anything delicate, to be quite frank. Because it's got...

It had disease on it. It had literal spores coming off it. You shouldn't be using any of it for anywhere other than your hands. I'm pretty sure it says that on the jar. Wash it up, liquid. Wash it up, liquid. On that bombshell, we're going to have to bid you adieu. We'll get out of here. That's it for Monday's

episode of the Luke and Pete Show on a sweltering August afternoon. We will be back, of course, on Thursday as we always are, when hopefully the temperature is a little bit better. Spoiler, it won't be. We're recording Thursday's show in a minute. And we'll see you next time. Bright-eyed and

bushy-tailed. Do get your emails in. Show, sorry, hello at lukeandpeatshow.com. The way this normally works is we speculate about something we know nothing about, and you email in with your knowledge. Thank you very much indeed, Pete Donaldson. Thanks to you, the listener, and we'll see you

next time. Ta-ta! This was a Stakhanov production and part of the ACAST Creative Network.