The Luke and Pete Show - A romp of biting otters

Episode Date: January 3, 2022

Welcome to the future. It’s 2022, and Pete is teaching Luke about those ultramodern NFTs. The outcome? They’re all shit. One thing that isn’t shit, however, is a story about a man who got bitten by otters. Thankfully Luke has one of them. We also re-visit Yakults and catalytic converter theft in the emails.Let us know how your year is going so far. Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Feel free to give us a follow while you're there! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh, first time I did it for the hell of it. Stuck it down the back of my tongue and then swallowed it. We are in the future. Oh, it's the future. Happy New Year, everyone. Pinch punch first of the year. Yeah. I hope 2022 is better than 2021 and 2020.

Will it be better? I don't know. It's hard to tell, to be honest. Probably not. Probably not. What are your big hopes for... Sorry, should I do an intro? Do you want to do an intro?

Sorry. I'm Luke. That's Pete. This is your home of sweet beans, the Luke and Pete show. Pete, that's that bit done. Yeah. Will you tell us

what your hopes are for 2022? I'm going to straighten up. I'm going to fly right. I'm going to stop eating quite so many Chinese meals. You're going to fuck the haters? I'll let the haters

fuck themselves. Yeah. They are quite self-destructive by their very nature. Yeah, true, actually. You're going to stop eating Chinese food, Sean? I'm going to start to look

like... Vince McMahon. Oh, my God. Oh'm going to start to look like Vince McMahon oh my god oh my god that video I could just pull the Vince McMahon chain emergency cord

and you'll go off on one there's a gif not really a gif like a twitter video of Vince McMahon sort of leaning over forget it

Irish wrestler leaning over and going oh like going yeah yeah and he looks is he medicated I've seen the video He's an Irish wrestler. Leaning over her and going, oh, yeah, yeah. And he looks... Is he medicated? I've seen the video.

Is he medicated? No, he's just done a lot of work. He's starting like Captain Tom. He's got a very wet mouth. His skin looks very dry and then his mouth looks very wet. Who's got the wettest mouth in media? Certain members of the Guardian Football Weekly crew,

in my opinion. Robbie Savage? Robbie Savage. Yes, he has got a bit of a wet mouth, yeah. I get there sometimes. Sometimes people on Mike, on some of the football podcasts I enjoy, they go...

Oh, right. And there's like something in there, epiglottis or whatever they've got. You are an absolute sound pervert, though. You can notice stuff that other people don't. You are. Yeah. I also notice stuff that other people don't notice. I move a bit. Yeah.

I also notice when people do bum edits and they edit in the middle of a breath. And another thing, and then they keep talking. It really puts me off. Don't show people listening where to find the edits. We are spotless we are beyond reproach true yeah we are good very good

we've got a good team around us great team what are your big ambitions for the year I don't know but you've got a fucking answer what is the fucking

I mean what is it's every it's every fucking year isn't it it does go quick now we all had plans last year and look what happened you know

what happened last year god stuff we all got a little bit older. Yeah. What was like the new kind of advances in stuff last year? Do you know how I feel for? What? The freelance journalists pitching their fucking columns.

Why do you? Why? Oh, I've got a good idea for a 2022 new you column. Travel blog. Yeah, it will be. It'll be a big thing. Subordinators and editors of sections in newspapers and websites will be inundated with freelance people pitching stuff

that's not very interesting about what's happening in 2022. And it'll be list articles. Right. It'll be ways to get fit. It'll be habits to get out of. It'll be the NFT revolution. Goal setting. Well, it's interesting you mentioned that

right because i still don't really know what nft is right um will people understand them more in 2022 you're a futurologist famously do you think that's something people are going to get involved with there is um i'm still yet to see many examples of nfts being used for good. Is it Sean Lennon? One of the Lennons. Yeah, it was Sean Lennon, John Lennon's son. Yeah. He's got big into the NFTs recently. Right.

A lot of NFTs are just someone's drawn a picture and they've just put a lot of hats, beards, clothing on their little characters like it might be a monkey or a chimp or a potato or something, and they'll just sort of go, oh, I'm dropping like 100 versions of this same little picture I've done on Photoshop and sell them off. It's very interesting,

but I'm yet to see some NFT art where I go, that is an interesting use of the form. I don't just don't know why anyone's buying this. People say on the show now, that's just your dad's records, mate. That's true. What are you doing? But he's selling some like kind of,

he's trying to sort of say, if you're like kind of into like blockchain and like NFTs in particular, and you're making your collection, like he's basically said, this ain't your daddy's NFTs. Like you're buying these NFTs in particular and you're making your collection. Like he's basically said, this ain't your daddy's NFTs. Like you're buying these NFTs that are childish. These drawings are really childish.

What I'm selling and the team that I'm involved in, they're like man's NFTs. And what he's got and the kind of pictures he's selling are these fucking skeletons. Ooh, spooky. Spooky lot of skeletons with like beards and shit. And it's just, it's very fashion and it's all about drops and it's all about sneakers that look a little bit different

to the other sneakers and stuff like that. And it's all... But what can people actually do with the NFT? You've just bought a picture. You've bought the rights to a slight deviation to another picture. What's to stop... So you buy... This is potentially a stupid question so bear with me you buy an ft yeah so you buy it for five grand yeah and you've basically got the rights to copyright whatever to a picture and you go by the way look at this nft i've got and you send me on whatsapp i screenshot that and say i've got the rights to this nft yeah check it out yeah can stop me. Well, you could do that with a picture of the Mona Lisa,

presumably, couldn't you? Nobody would believe you. But what I'm saying, no, I get that. But what I'm saying is in the modern day, no one fucking cares who owns the rights to it. Yeah, that is true. Yeah, that is true. So it's a bit of a waste of time.

Yeah. And things keep improving and keep getting better, but I'm yet to see the killer app. I mean,'s you know every NBA team everyone has got a bit of IP it's a bit of a land grab

it's a bit of a cash grab I'm yet to see something that actually gives someone a bit of value for what they're paying for you know what I mean I can understand

something like you know the Wu-Tang crew clan and that record at least it was a record at least it was something that no one else had

it was the Screlly wasn't it Martin Screlly the farmer bro but then he got bought out after he went he got his assets seized he got his assets seized

so that got resold again but at least that's a thing at least that's something you've got a wealth of thing that no one else can have physically but it is kind of like we sound like such grandads

talking about it like well what's the point because you're not you're not owning it but ownership physically it is kind of like, well, you sound like such a grandad talking about it, like, well, what's the point? Because you're not owning it. But ownership physically is so kind of last century anyway. So I understand why it's moved on. I understand why... You don't see a lot of the money you have.

Well, it's an extension for me of the Fortnite skins. It's the extension for me for the PUBG hat. You know what I mean? I've got this fucking hat and, you know and new video games I think Ubisoft

are getting involved in them. You have to play like 600 hours and then you're liable, you can win this hat or mask for your character and you can also sell it on Ubisoft. It's kind of, and it's on this blockchain that's a bit more responsible environment wise.

It will get better, it will get more clear and people will get their heads around it more but at the moment it's on this blockchain that's a bit more responsible environment-wise. It will get better, it will get more clear, and people will get their heads around it more, but at the moment, it's very sneak-ahead kind of territory for me. It's very kind of like, oh my God, Kanye has dropped these Yeezys that have, I don't know, a different button than the other one sort of thing, and it's kind of the actual artifact itself. But they'll make more than one copy of that, won't they?

Yeah, but it's a very limited drop. You know, you're limiting the amount of drops. I mean, I own a couple of like so rare football cards. And they are, you know, because nobody gives a toss about that particular website that I bought them on. They're kind of worth a sort of thing. They're on the Ethereum blockchain. They're, you know, $20 each or something.

And they just sat there. And like, no one's ever going to buy them off me. Why would you buy them then? I want to get on the fucking... You want to get involved? I want to fucking get on it, mate.

I was a year ago. I was young. I was reckless, mate. Yeah. I was young. I was reckless. I just wanted a little blockchain bobby.

Could you print the card out and put it on your desk in your shed? Well, that's what I mean. It's interesting. I'm just yet to see something else. I go, oh, yeah, I'd buy that. That's worth it.

The big story of 2022 is going to be Pete, NFT millionaire. I actually know someone whose brother has made a million off NFTs. Right, okay. Yeah. Is he an artist? I think so, yeah.

Right, okay. It's good it decentralises the money that artists can make though the art that I'm seeing getting sold

for decent money is fucking embarrassing the amount of stuff you know if Gary Kasparov is like so I made the mistake of going in one of those

little twitter rooms where you can listen to people yapping oh what's it called again it's a fucking room. It's just rooms, isn't it? It's just Twitter rooms. And I went in an NFT one, and it was fucking brilliant.

A lot of people just talking about how shit Budweiser are and how shit Pepsi are and how shit these agencies are that know about the NFTs, kind of making a load of money off these big multinational conglomerates and doing... I can't believe this has become an AFT 2022 show. I don't know anything about what you're talking about. And I don't, I know even less, but I'm having a fucking crack. They're whinging about the fact that how much these,

there's like two or three agencies in America that have got on this quite early and they're selling their work, they're selling their kind of expertise to big companies and so like budweiser are releasing i think a bottle with some fucking cool dude shades on and stuff and it looks shit and everyone's going oh that's shit but the other stuff that they the other stuff these people respect is also shit as well it's just not done by a cynical uh you know marketing company effectively um but they were sort of talking about they're going look uh and they were talking about this song that this this woman came on said yeah i mean i've been you know, marketing company effectively. But they were talking about, they're going, look, and they were talking about this song that this woman came on and said,

yeah, I mean, I've been, you know, making a shitload of NFTs and me and my friend made this song about minting NFTs and it's really good. And everyone's going, yeah, I've heard it. It's really good. I just want to kick back. And I listened to this song they'd made about minting an NFT and it was

the most embarrassing piece of trash i've ever heard in my life and i was like this is there's not a lot of good stuff kicking around the nft space can they nft that they're nft in the song yeah they minted it it's a song about minting nft is very meta in a web three three point or metaverse kind of style um there's just a lot of trash art getting thrown around, and that's almost not what it's about. It's about owning something that's decentralized and being a part of something I don't think many people truly understand.

We'll get there, though. Do you want to talk about a man who got bitten by otters? Yes, I would like to talk about a man who was bitten to bits by otters. I like the idea of people listening to our show on the way to work or whatever. Okay, yeah, Pete's talking about NFTs

and they maybe zone out for five seconds and all of a sudden we're talking about otters. Yeah. Yeah? Because this is a story, I enjoyed the NFT chat,

I don't understand any of it, maybe our listeners can help us. However, when I say that kind of stuff, the more tedious end of our listenership get in touch. Right.

Do we have any of those? I've never met any of them. They're all lovely intelligent you are the good guy you're the good guy on the show i'm obviously the bad guy on every show i'm on um so a story we missed towards the end of december was a um a guy who was walking through a park in singapore a british guy lives in singapore uh early morning walk very nice imagine. Imagine the parks in Singapore are beautiful. And he was set upon, chased, pinned down, and bitten 26 times in 10 seconds, apparently, by, this is the key bit, a family.

A family. Of otters. Wrong-uns. As bore family more like. And I just think to myself, is that, that's terrifying but is it more terrifying because it's otters

and I'm also annoyed because the people who covered the story yeah I'm looking at you Samantha Locke

of the Guardian a broadly anti-otter the collective noun for an otter right for otters is a romp of otters

a romp of otters why I missed the opportunity to use that because romps tabloid speak in the Guardian oh romp of otters. Why miss the opportunity to use that? Because romps tabloid speak in the Guardian. Oh, true actually, yeah. I can't use that. You can't use that.

She could have said by a romp of otters. They would think that they were using tabloid speak when they weren't and they'd be like, well, you need to explain

that a romp of otters. Is she going to put that in, I suppose? She should have put it in. Maybe it's a sub and it's a change. I don't know. Maybe it's not Samantha'sadventure changed it. I don't know. Maybe it's not Samantha's to blame,

but she's just trying to do a good, honest job. Graham George Spencer was the guy. He says, I actually thought I was going to die. They were going to kill me. His friend came along and ran up and started screaming to scare them away. Screaming? Yeah.

I'm presuming because they were scary, because they were terrified. But apparently this is like a thing. This is like a thing. Right. So in addition to the story, there's a guy in Singapore earlier this year, last year,

he was bit on the leg by an otter and he was 77 years old. There's apparently a couple of people were confronted by an aggressive romp of otters in Alaska last year as well and there's been a lot of incidents of them attacking dogs attacking children and adults now to me if you walk it through if you walk through a park and you see i don't know if i can bear you're conditioned to know that's dangerous yeah the otter thing is more terrifying because you think they look quite cute I like the video I like the video

of them you know cracking a nut on their yeah holding hands or cracking a nut on their fucking chest while they're swimming on their back they're apparently

vicious these bastards I mean what did you have in your pockets though could you have had like a bit of sushi or something monster munch

some fish some monster munch but there's different types of otters of course yeah and you know those sea otters there's different types of otters, of course. And those sea otters, they're fucking, not sea otters.

What are the ones, I think you get them in South America and they are fucking giant. I think it's just called giant otters. They are fucking gigantic. They look like human beings in suits. I like it. They would take you down in a second. I love an otter.

But you famously had an encounter with a hippo that you weren't scared of. Wasn't scared of, no. Why weren't you scared of it? I've never otter. But you famously had an encounter with a hippo that you weren't scared of. Wasn't scared of, no. Why weren't you scared of it? I've never had anything. What, because there were bigger boys there? Because you were in a bar. I was in a bar.

Yeah. I could drink him under the table. You didn't think at any point, jeez, this is quite scary. Because they're statistically very dangerous animals. Yeah, that's why they shot his mama. Mama. But yeah, I got sent a picture of that otter

like last week for some reason. That hippo? Sorry, not otter. Yeah. But how, I got sent a picture of that otter like last week for some reason. That hippo? Sorry, not otter. Yeah. But how are you feeling about being attacked by otters? I reckon I could take a few of them. I'd stamp on it.

What's your cut off? Stamp. Stamp on an otter. Why do you make it so cruel? What do you mean? Everyone's baiting me. Because they're defending themselves, aren't they? Why are they defending?

They're in a park, weren't they? They're running up and defending. The best defence is a good offence. You always get, in these kind of articles, you always get like, right, okay, you can imagine it in the newsroom. We're going to need a quote from some kind of otter group. You know what I mean? So you get like, oh, there's a guy here

who's apparently a member of Otter Watch and the otter working group that tracks otters in the area saying that those otters are... By the way, they're not even official garden otters they're not even in there as an exhibit they apparently just pop in every so often

and they said that it was early morning so it was probably quite dark and they were confused by the man the big otter so they just bit him

loads of times it's just a mad story isn't it have you ever met anyone who's been bit you would never meet anyone who's been bit by an otter it's fucking crazy it's insane

absolutely insane good god oh look I finished that TV show we were talking about oh yes speaking of

otters did you like the otters at the end midnight mass midnight mass it was alright actually yeah I stuck with it

and it got silly but all good really okay so people listening who haven't seen it I'm sure Pete probably likes it more than I haven't seen it it's a show I mean I'm sure

Pete probably likes it more than I do it's fine it's worth watching but if you don't want to be spoilered maybe just skip this next minute or two

right because we're going to talk about it okay let's just talk about it okay what I liked about it yeah

was it was camp but what I didn't like about it was it wasn't camp enough right okay when the angel was basically a vampire camp but what i didn't like about it was it wasn't camp enough right okay um when you went with the angel was basically a vampire with the fedora hat and the trench coat that's class so they didn't

lean into it enough no i guess um yeah he didn't sort of like it would have been funny if he spoke no because the thing is if you don't lean into it enough i'm there thinking why have you put him in a trench coat and a fedora he's been roaming the earth for like thousands of years in a trench coat and a fedora he's never had that cloak presumably he's never had those clothes on before

where does he keep it because he flies around I love the Gavin he doesn't fly around with his cloak does he I liked the priest he was brilliant

Monsignor he was very good he was amazing I've sat and called our dog Monsignor Buckley yeah that's nice and what do you think

about the fella bursting into flames on the boat could he not have done that by himself did he have to bring Nia Jax from WWE into it

is that who it is no I wanted him to prove she looks like Nia Jax from WWE I think he wanted to prove it to her didn't he

he went you're never going to believe this but watch this if you didn't believe it no later in the night you're never going to believe this. You're never going to believe this. But watch this. Yeah. If you didn't believe it now, like later in the night,

you'd sort of believe it, wouldn't you? Where do you rate it? I was surprised how many of the main characters they killed off. Well, they're not really killed off because they're vampires, aren't they? Yeah. But, uh... Did you watch it with the partner you've got access to?

Yeah. Did she like it? Yeah, she liked it. It was good. Apparently it's part of a... Is it part of this kind of... Is it the House of Unhealed Haunting? All these fucking...

I don't really watch a lot of horror. So the House of Unhealed Haunting horror. Yeah. That thing. Same writers, maybe? Same writers, same cast as well, I think. Oh, right. Apparently, it's like three or four different dramas.

Three or four different TV shows. They have the similar sort of casts in there, I think. I've never watched any of those. Have you? No, I haven haven't I'm not a big horror guy but I might be because the woman who looks

like Nia Jax she's apparently what they call a scream queen she's in a lot of horror films so I think that'd be fun wouldn't it well just having just

being like the I'd like to be like this remember like Emily Booth from she used to do bits the video game TV show she used to do a bit of channel 4 work but

in the main she was just a mainstay of slightly sexy British horror films in the 90s. Yeah. Which is like a weird kind of subculture that nobody really is into in the grand scheme of things. I just think if you're an actor, it's probably quite hard to get big, big things going on. Right. Have a scheme of things. I just think if you're an actor and you're not, it's probably quite hard to get big, big things going on.

Right. Have a bit of fun. Have a bit of fun, yeah. But imagine being part of the horror thing in America, it's probably a lot of fun. Are you going to rebrand yourself as a horror guy in 2022 then?

What, like get really into Fright Fest and stuff? Yeah. Like Chris Dilley from Clash of the Titles. Yeah. Maybe I will. Maybe I'll just I will always drag every film I watch

back to Midnight Mass as if it's like a Hammer Horror from the 50s if you had to rebrand yourself yeah

oh right okay what would you do well I mean Steampunk Steampunk obviously whenever I see anything

Steampunk I will send you a picture of it yeah yeah you do and Only Fuzz and Horses Steampunk, obviously. Whenever I see anything steampunk, I will send you a picture of it. Yeah, you do. And Only Fuzz and Horses. Anything like that, really.

There was a lot of Only Fuzz and Horses Christmas Jumpers knocking about, weren't there? There was, yes. Imagine Steampunk Only Fuzz and Horses. You just imagine Goodnight Sweetheart. The car is all got cogs in it yeah Rodney's a big cog

so it's just Only Fools and Horses with a cog the bar doesn't even need someone to lift it up like somebody a little cog

steam powered steam powered yeah and then yeah so you basically just re-imagine Only Fools and Horses but with cogs Only Cogs and Horses

Buster Merrifield's playing Uncle Albert he's got like a coggy pipe he would fit in the steampunk everything that Dale Boyd gets

for the market turns out just to be cogs in boxes let's try and sell them hey every cog needs a rod knee so there you go it does

let's have a break and when we come back we'll do some emails and we'll also do a bit more of this a bit more of this chat so we'll see you in a sec. Alright then.

It's time for more Luke and Pete show. Oh is that the time? I wonder what time it was. It's time for more Luke and Pete show mate.

We've got to do some emails. Who have you turned into? I don't know. Chris has said hello on the old email list we've got

here. Evening chaps. I'm currently catching up on episodes so I apologise if you've had the answer already to the question. Donald Terry. Chris has said hello on the old email list we've got here. Evening, chaps. I'm currently catching up on episodes, so I apologise if you've had the answer already to the question. Why steal a catalytic converter? Well, that's going back some time. Well, I think we kind of know.

It's all full of questions now, isn't it? It's got titanium or something in it. What is it? A platinum. Yeah, a couple of years ago, my dad fell victim to the crime of cat converter theft. It was in broad daylight in a public car park in town while we were at a Barnsley match. My dad took his car to the garage on the Monday, and the mechanic explained that people are stealing them because they have platinum inside.

I've just done a quick Google search, and it appears that the standard cat-lit converter has three to seven grams of platinum inside. My dad drives a Honda Jazz, and in the same week his was stolen, one of the presenters of a motoring YouTube channel I watch also had his stolen from his Honda Jazz. I don't know if this is a coincidence or if the Jazz has a typically high level of platinum inside its cat. I'm enjoying that we've foreshortened the word catalytic into cat,

like we're really on nodding terms with what we're talking about here. But maybe the Honda Jazz is just a big floozy. Yeah. Just letting its cat converter, its cat con, just kind of flop out a bit. I've got two cats. I can get that easily.

If I said to the wife I've got access to, there's a high level of platinum inside our cat, she would be asking questions big time. Our mate Vish drives a Honda Jazz famously.

So maybe, does he know what gold mine he's sitting in? I'm going to take it. I'm going to steal his. That would be quite an obscure thing to do, wouldn't it? To steal your colleague's catalytic converter. Who drives in?

I drive in, so I could steal my own. Jules drives in sometimes. That's about it, really, isn't it? I could steal Jules. Jules has got a big car as well. No, she's just very small. No, she's got a big Range Rover somewhere, hasn't she? I'd climb under that, and it'd be really easy because

I imagine a Range Rover is all kind of like it's all like proper like mechanical under there because there's a Range

Rover do you know like in this probably can't happen now because cars are different but it was a big thing

in TV shows back in the day and films to get yourself a little ruler put it down the side of the window of a car

fiddle about a bit and the lock would pop up and you'd get in. And then all you do is apparently find two wires under the dashboard, touch them together, and the car starts. Was that ever a thing in real life? Yeah, of course it was, yeah.

So when you turn the key, you're linking the two together and it creates a spark and it starts the engine. So you just pull them out of the lock and touch them and that's all you've got to do clonk yeah really easy stuff

and I guess but nowadays I think lads just and it is me lads just pull on the side of the door they just sort of pull on the side of the door

get their hand in because if you don't give a shit about messing it up but why would you nick it if you're just going to mess it up well you pull on the end

of the thing no you're not nicking it but you pull on the end of the pull on the top of the not nicking it, but you pull on the top of the window, get your hand in, and then open it up and see what's inside, basically. A lot of people say it's probably safer if you just leave your door unlocked, because then they don't bother,

then they don't fuck up your car. I'm not going to do that, am I? Why? Because that's ridiculous. Why is that ridiculous? Because they're going to fucking open the door. Well, they're going to pull on the top of your car. If your door's not open,

they're going to pull on the top of your car, aren't they? I've got an alarm and an immobiliser in my car. So I don't think it's going to matter. What, you've got one of those little... What's an immobiliser? It stops people from being able to drive it. Is it one of those like... Because I saw a really fancy Range Rover in my street.

And someone had got one of those steering wheel locks things. Those yellow things from the 80s. They had one of those in there. Most people in my neighborhood have got one of those. But why? I guess it's a good question. I think the way my mobilizer works, I think, is if it doesn't detect the key in the car,

it sets the alarm off. Right, okay. It stops you doing anything until you press a button on the key. If it's not present, there's nothing you can do. Right. So you can steal stuff from in it. There's nothing in my car,

apart from a box of chewing gum, an iPhone connecting cable, and a chapstick that's leaked. How is it leaked? It's like melted. I think it melted or something. I've got some dashboard wipes, I've got some

masks. Is that because you play HeroQuest in the car? I've got some dairy milk as well, which kind of melted. Don't Hero Quest in the car? I've got some dairy milk as well, which kind of melted. Don't believe that in the car. No. That is an absolute mugs game. If he wants empty cans of sugar-free Carabao,

this guy is going to go hog wild on my ride, to be honest. I used to have loads of empty crisp packets in the car from when you used to ride in it, but I stopped. I rode in it once. And you went load of crisps in the bag. I ate one bag of crisps

and left the bag in there yeah and then I texted you and said John John Luke Luke one of the Bible lot

Luke I literally I just left a bag of crisps in the back of your car I didn't mean to but crisps are delicious unacceptable let's do this other email here

from Simon in Norwich hello Hello to you, Simon. By the way, if you are still listening to this, please don't steal my car. Or Pete's. Pete's is probably easier to steal than mine. Why? It's smaller, cheaper. It's 2018. It's probably got updated security features. I've seen your car. There's no way that's the case.

Simon in Norwich says, hi guys. Your discussion about Yakult. Do you know what this happens on the New Compete show because we have a big backlog of emails it takes us ages to get to them someone will go your discussion about Yakult

and I think to myself God I hope this isn't going to be I hope I'm not going to have to know what I'm talking about here because I don't remember discussing Yakult at all reminding me of a

stag weekend I went on in 2008 2008 what were you doing in 2008 Peter? what was I doing in 2008 I was working for XFM yeah having a lovely old time but probably were you doing in 2008, Peter? What was I doing in 2008? I was working for XFM, yeah. Yeah, having a lovely old time.

But probably, look, were you working at that? Yeah, probably. I was very tired. It might have been when you turned the Christmas lights on in Holloway, right? Anyway, Simon picks up the story. He says,

After three solid days on the beer, the breakfast buffet on the final morning was a welcome sight. It had the full array of goodies, including Actamel, which he describes as the little chavvy brother of Yakult. I don't know if it is. It's a nuke on the block in there, Actamel.

Actamel... Don't think you can say chav anymore, either. Sorry about that. Is that what came in on the email? Oh, yes, because Roddy was telling me about this email. It really made me laugh, the chavvy version. I don't think people say chub anymore, do they? No, they don't.

Offensive. It's quite offensive. You should probably stop saying it then. Two attendees decided to take on the ActML challenge in ad campaign at the time promoting unsuspecting people goaded into two weeks of gut rehab.

The chaps in question drank a month's worth each in one sitting, checked out of the hotel and joined us on the minibus for the five-hour journey back to Norfolk. Three hours in and rumbling noises were heard. Ten minutes later, the shout of,

I'm going to explode, came from the back. The bus pulled into a pub car park and with just one stall in the gents, a urinal took the full brunt of a long weekend's cheap beer and terrible food mixed in with pink strawberry Actimel safe to say the challenge was an instant success

love the show Simon in Norwich no one needs that in their lives no it's the kind of thing you would do Peter well I do like

delicious yoghurt drinks I'll drink anything yoghurt-y it's quite a 2008 story this it sounds like an Inbetweeners

episode well you should like it then shouldn't you I love the Inbetweeners we haven't gotten that real big debate all of us about-betweeners episode doesn't it well you should like it there shouldn't you I love the in-betweeners love the in-betweeners we haven't gotten that real big debate all of

us about in-betweeners versus peep show and I was the only one who voted in-betweeners yeah stand by it didn't see the peep show film did you

didn't see a peep show film no there isn't there isn't an in-betweeners but I don't like David Mitchell or Robert Webb yeah you don't like comedy

it's true you don't like comedians you don't like comedy you don't like people trying to be funny you just think it's unbecoming it's childish you think men and women over 30 should not

try and be funny no my feelings are very complicated I think really old people are funny right they kind of really old people

that's kind of my top of humour right okay I think people who try to be funny it's not my thing possibly because I'm very naturally funny

yeah okay yeah it just oozes out of you yeah like Actimel yeah sometimes it explodes out of me into a gents urinal anyway on that bombshell

literally a bombshell almost a bombshell of vomit it's time to say goodbye but we will be back on thursday for the second show of 2022 why don't you get in touch with us and tell us how your year is going so far um on thursday it will be the 6th of january by that point so we'll be a good five or six days in yeah tell us how your year's going so far hello at luke and peach.com we are at luke and peach

show on twitter and Instagram. Also, tell us what you think about, we haven't even talked about our new logo, Pete. Have we? Have we not? Got a new logo a few weeks ago. Got a new logo. It's a good one.

Yeah, it is good. It makes us both look really handsome, even though our heads have opened up, like in that film, Hannibal. It makes us look like when we lose our hair, when we're older, I'll be all right, I reckon. I think I'll look like a little dude. Why do you have

so for those who haven't seen the artwork you can just look on your phone right now our heads are open with things coming out of our head and it can't make sense

why do you have a Gameboy and chopsticks coming out and I have a toilet coming out of mine and a CD yeah it's interesting isn't it

yeah I like it I can't the problem is I can't look at it for too long because I just get distracted

which is good I'm really I'm really proud of that yeah it's good you didn't do it did you The problem is I can't look at it for too long because I just get distracted. I'm really proud of that. Yeah, it's good. You didn't do it, did you? No, I didn't do it. I paid someone else to do it. Helloatlookatbeach.com is the destination. Thank you very much if you've listened and sent an email in so far.

We really appreciate it. We will be back on Thursday for more of this and we bloody look forward to speaking to you then. Say goodbye, Peter. Farewell. There's goodbye from me as well the luke and pete show is a stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network. level embrace it journey starts when you say so if you've got five minutes or 50 peloton tread has workouts you can work in or bring your classes with you for outdoor runs walks and hikes led by

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