The Luke and Pete Show - An acquired taste of a human being

Episode Date: December 20, 2021

This is the Luke and Pete Show, your one-stop shop for all of the latest Sex and the City news, apparently. Once Pete has updated us on the latest goss *spoiler alert*, we then get into the show's beef with Peloton and learn why Pete doesn’t want to exercise in the new year. We also receive a delightful email concerning ninja gyms and read some parkour reviews. That’s the stuff.Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Feel free to give us a follow while you're there! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh, are you ready for it? Little bit of the bubbly. Little bit of the bubbly. Little bit of the sweet beans. Lukey Moore, I've decided for my New Year's resolution as we hurtle towards the end of another year, I am not, I repeat, not going to get in a shit because I've heard that Mr. Big,

because I love food, I have seen that Mr. Big from Sex and the City, it's not really a spoiler because it's all over Twitter, he died. If you're a fan of Sex and the City and you genuinely are annoyed about that spoiler, you really should have been on this he died and he died on the back of a peloton bike

because he did a load of spin classes and he had a heart attack and died and this is in the new series of Sex and the City new series 2021 baby they're back apart from the woman who's in Police Academy she's not like one of the other ones I think

I love our half-remembered celebrity tittle-tattle. Yeah. But he died on a Peloton bike and... So you think it's dangerous now? I think working out might be dangerous. Dicey and the price of a Peloton bike. I know, right? Well, Peloton, I thought,

can you really sort of give a brand name out and say this guy died on the back of a Peloton bike? Because people pay for undue prominence or due prominence you wonder if they'll be happy with that you think they sort of

go well that's not fair because and then they would probably argue I'm sure he's been loyal to death anyway I'm sure like the Sex and the City HBO Max probably

sort of go well I mean you could technically die on any bike couldn't you so I mean but let me put it to you then right

and this is a Luke and Pete show, by the way. You're one-stop shop for all the Sex and the City news and the heart attack news. I'm Luke, that's Pete. If I said, if I told you

that someone you didn't know and was also, by the way, a fictional character died from a heart attack for laughing so hard at one of your jokes, would you be happy or sad about that?

I think if they died doing something they loved, listening to one of my great jokes, I would consider doing a cameo video for the WIC. That's nice, actually. For £30. Most crematoriums, in my experience, don't have a big screen. So how are you going to display that?

Would you volunteer your AV skills to display it as well? Yes, exactly. You might as well just deliver it live. Bring my little projector. Yeah, I mean, we'd be talking buns then, wouldn't we? We'd be doing money. Have you been invited to be on? The thing is, you're doing a cameo at someone's funeral.

Yeah. But you've also got to do the AV. You've got to go there. Got to go there. So I may as well just deliver a sermon, deliver a chat. A eulogy. Straighten up and fly right, guys. Because you'll end up in a box like this, cunt.

Touching. Touching, yeah. A eulogy. Straighten up and fly right, guys. Because you're letting me put in a box like this, cunt. Touching. Touching, yeah. I never met him. I never knew him. And my humour killed him. Yeah. And that is why I'm allowed to climb in this box

and see what's going on in there. Got to check. I need to know. I need to know. I need to know what his funny bone is like. And then they walk out of the crematorium to the,

not the crematorium, to the church, into the graveyard, look into the hole, and you're just sat in the bottom of your pants, eating mud. Eating mud. I found a worm! He'd have fucking loved this. But, so Peloton have kind of shot back at Sex and the City, saying... Oh, fair enough, fair enough.

Dr. Susan Steinbaum, a preventative cardiologist and member of the Health and Wellness Advisory Council, cha-ching for Peloton, in a statement at the time said, Mr. Big lived... I mean, they're defending their position. Instead of going, right, I'll see you in fucking court,

they're basically saying, Mr. Big lived with what many would call an extravagant lifestyle. Cocktails, cigars, big steaks. And he was at serious risk because he had a previous cardio event in season six. These lifestyle choices

and perhaps even his family history, which often is a significant factor with the likely cause of his death. Riding his Peloton bike may have even helped delay his cardiac event. Do you think that's what she got into medical school for? I know, right? Yeah.

Good God. The amount of... I was talking to a doctor a little while ago, a couple of years ago, and he was saying about his doctor-y friend who'd gone, an A&E doctor, gone to America to be a doctor. Like, you know, he'd done all of his... Say doctor again.

He'd done all his doctrines over here. He'd done all of his doctrines and now he's over in America and he has to do another five years of training to get to where they are and to make the serious Mamamoo die. Mamamoo die. Mamamoo die.

Give me another phrase for money that you just make up on the spot. Oh. Because you can do anything. Cash teens. It works. Anything works. Yeah. Yeah.

Delano. Some of those sweet shrubs. Shrubs. Anything. It sounds like money. No, you've got to have the money in there. No, you don't. The badalumos.

You don't have to have the word money in there. No, you don't. The Badalumos. You don't have to have the word money in there. You have to have something that rhymes or sounds a little bit like money. Moolah doesn't sound like money. Moolah?

Yeah. Yeah, I know, but someone else has made that up. We're making new ones up. Okay, right. Yeah. Okay.

Screen beans. Screen beans. Okay. The big screen. Beans on your screen. Big screen. Yeah, well, you look at it on the screen

these days, don't you? Give me another one. By the way, with your hair at the moment, you look like Nicolas Cage. Where look at it on the screen these days don't you give me another one by the way with your hair at the moment you look like Nicolas Cage where's that come from look I'll show you look in here

look in here look at this camera I've fallen foul of that on more than one occasion with you sunshine look at your hair oh yeah it's gone

it's gone it's like when he's got the owl or the eagle in his hair my hair is a purr anyway carry on with your Purrton story well I've just I've just thought

it's really interesting that they... You were talking about your mate who's doing a load of binnacle training or something. Yeah, but you've got to do loads of training on top of what we would suggest would qualify you to an A&E. People generally know that you have to work hard and do a lot of training. Yeah, but you've got to do more in America because you're getting the old double reinos. You're getting the old damn marinos.

You're getting the old Sam marinos. You're getting the old damn marinos, baby. So what's your point? I just think it's, I just think that Pelotonicals, we'd like to, and we'd like to, no, that's what I mean.

It's funny because parody law and satire, like you can get away with doing so much stuff in America that I don't think you get away with here. I don't think you can get away with saying that, what's a big fucking thing? Don't say it. No fucking line on any kind of broadcast you start with. You can could get away with saying that what's a big fucking thing don't say it no fucking line on any kind of

broadcast you start with you can't get away with saying this but like a famous gym owned by someone who may or may not have

been in Dragon's Den if you had a lot of gyms and I'm out don't do the voice that's worse

don't do the voice if you said I went to the gym I'm writing a character and he goes to one of these gyms and he the voice that's worse don't do the voice if you said I went to the gym I'm writing a character and he goes to one of these gyms and he dies like that's why did you choose my gym

if I own the gym I'm saying can you just call it a generic gym can you just call it a generic gym the effect is the same yeah I know it's mad absolutely mad

I saw an article that someone wrote a while back which I didn't agree with and it annoyed me yeah saying that the Sopranos is overrated if you really want to if you really want to get insight

into the female character, you should watch Sex and the City. I think it's the opposite, isn't it? The female characters in The Sopranos are really fucking multidimensional and really strong. Aren't the Sex and the City characters just complete cartoon characters?

I just always think that, I was watching a TV show called Maid. Have you seen the TV show called Maid? I haven't, no. It's about a young woman who has a little bairn and she is in an abusive relationship and she

has to make ends meet by becoming a maid and she goes on adventures and stuff like that. And it's really good and it's harrowing and she's really good in it. It's someone's daughter. Everyone in Hollywood is now someone's daughter. It's the second generation

of an acting family. I thought it was the second. Andy McDowell's daughter, and Andy McDowell's in it, actually. And she's very good. The show's very excellent. But the thing that gets me is, when they show women,

mainly women, who are having a fucking terrible time, they've always got to have a... In her case, even though she's working as a fucking terrible time, they've always got to have, in her case, even though she's working as a maid and stuff, she's got this dream to be a writer. Yeah.

And she's very good at writing and she wants to become a writer and she wants to go to university, et cetera, et cetera. Can we not just have a character where a woman is just having a fucking dreadful time and she doesn't have a fucking skill. She likes watching Netflix. She likes just watching fucking TV. And she just wants to survive because she's a human character rather than she's got to have this kind of middle-class aspirational thing

that the viewership, the middle-class viewership recognises, so to speak. Can like kind of relate to you. Yeah. Can I just fucking, can I just have a nice life, please? Have this kind of, like yeah can i just fucking can i just have a nice life please without having to have this kind of right like a right a writer writing a tv show thinks that they're fucking that bion lendot is being a writer and that's the thing to strive for this kind of creativity it's like can we not just have characters who just just want to fucking have a nice life and be satisfied with with their family and and see, and be, not satisfied,

but you know, their career trajectory, it isn't the main thing in their fucking life. Yeah. Because it's very reductionist and it happens more with female characters

than it does with male characters. Do you feel seen? What do you mean? Because you don't have any ambition. I don't have any ambition. I just want a man who wants to be left alone. He just wants to be left alone.

But Pete, I'll tell you if i could if i could play devil's advocate just for the sake of it it's not much of a story is it what do you mean there needs to be a story needs to be a fucking she's in an abusive relationship and she's trying to get out of it but like abusive relationships you get pulled back in don't you so that's the call fucking push and pull her university still bit of a sideshow to be honest for me but it needs to have more than one thing about it, I suppose. It is just sort of go,

I would very much like to own a Breville. Yeah. And she could be working on that. Well, the toasty one or the pie one. I really want, I'm in a terrible relationship and my daughter's trying to get her into, like, so many kindergartens and stuff and it's a nightmare and because of the traps that an abusive relationship, I just want five minutes,

I just want an hour to watch an episode of Succession. That's the thing. That's what she wants. Are you watching it? Started it. Don't like it. No, I love Succession, but it is very much... I think it's the...

It's a very... It's cocaine. Like, everyone's chippy, sarcastic, growling, angry. Fuck off! And they just sort of all amped up all of the time. They're like, I'm going to fucking do this, and I'm going to fucking do that. Where's my PR woman?

I'm going to do this. Bah, bah, bah, bah. And it's just this kind of like, it never calms down, that TV show. I know what you mean. Everyone's just trying to destroy each other. Not this show, really. But it is very much the human embodiment of... Have you seen all the chat

about Jeremy Strong, the actor who plays Kendall... The one who was in Spooks. I don't know who he is. Back in the day. Kendall Roy. Oh, right. Okay, you hear him, yeah.

Always has shit trainers on. Yeah, he does, actually. But I mean, to be honest, as you know, I'm married into an American family, so I've got to choose my words carefully.

Right. Footwear among young men in america isn't great it's a really poor area and it should be improved so um but he's he the way he his process to use a horrible kind of inflated word for someone who's effectively just an actor his process apparently is now being talked about as being quite problematic, quite toxic. Right, okay. So he's of the school of, you know, he worships like Daniel Day-Lewis and all these kind of immersive actor types. But he's got, you wouldn't say he was like, his character was particularly...

It's very intense, isn't it? And brooding. It is very intense and brooding. But is, I mean, does he he bring does he need to stay in character well apparently that's just how he acts right so like for example

I find it fascinating this because he a lot of people have said there's a big profile of him in the New Yorker yeah and the person who

interviewed him said made I guess the mistake in the interview of calling it a dark comedy right

a commentary observational comedy about that particular class of person. Apparently he was completely oblivious. He was like, what?

What, he didn't find it funny? None of it. And what's fascinating to me is that Brian Cox, who plays Logan Roy, has come up with some quite interesting stuff. I think he's saying,

I've got a lot of respect for Jeremy, I like him personally, but Jeremy Strong will take himself away from Brian Cox when they're filming and won't speak to him

because that's the character but apparently the way Brian Cox acts this old fashioned kind of different way of doing it he just turns it off and on yeah

which I find more impressive because it's acting isn't it yeah but that's more impressive isn't it yeah it is massively you can see why people want to immerse themselves in characters

because you can say okay right if I become that person if I kind of you know if I essentially just turn into that character it's going to be easier for me

yeah but what they're saying I think reading between the lines I don't think this has been explicitly said but I think what may be thought

is that it kind of just bums everyone out because he's just always this kind of dark morose kind of weirdo and ultimately

everyone else wants to have a nice time at work and tellingly Kieran Culkin who plays Roman Roy who's basically a confident you

right okay yeah he says he said I don't know he said some comment I don't know if it makes

Jeremy's makes it easier for Jeremy but it certainly doesn't make it easier for me it's quite interesting how people approach

these things I like Culkin yeah I think he's excellent in it he's really good but anyway what were we talking about it certainly doesn't make it easier for me. It's quite interesting how people approach these things. I like Culkin. Yeah, I think he's excellent in it. He's really good. But anyway, what were we talking about? I can't remember, but it doesn't matter because you mentioned the word steak earlier. Steak.

And I saw, this is a bit of you this time. I saw a steak. A company called Miatek 3D have 3D printed the first ever steak with bovine cells that mature into muscle and fat. It's a four-ounce steak that was made completely by 3D printing. For those of our metric cousins, it's 110 grams of steak. And it got me thinking.

That's quite interesting, right? It got me thinking. Obviously, I have no idea how they did it. But what are they going to do with that steak? I don't know. No one's going to eat it, are they? People aren't going to eat it. It's a waste. Well, I guess. It needs to be studied. It needs to be studied that steak? I don't know. No one's going to eat it, are they? People aren't going to eat it.

It's a waste. Well, I guess... It needs to be studied. It needs to be studied. It would need to be studied. I mean, they probably know everything there is to know about what's growing, but then you would also sort of go, right, look, if it's got the capacity to replicate cells,

it could probably have the capacity to replicate cancerous cells. So let's check that out, child. But then eating cancer doesn't really... If you were a cancerous cell, you'd be fine, wouldn't you? What are you doing? What do you mean? What are you talking about? I'm just saying that you've got to be careful what you eat.

You've made that up, though. What? What you do with eating cancer cells. Yeah, but if you eat cancer cells, it doesn't mean that you get cancer. The carcinogens create the cancer. But the point I'm making is that it would be ridiculous to eat it anyway, right?

Why would it be ridiculous to eat it? Because you want to use it as a prototype to make as much as you can. Presumably it's a sustainable way of getting people to eat, quote, meat. They would it be ridiculous to eat it? Because you want to use it as a prototype to make as much as you can. For Zoom, it's a sustainable way of getting people to eat, quote, meat. They don't just grow one and go, oh, have we made this again? I've written this down.

They have done that. I know, but they don't make it and go, oh, fuck, I forgot to write down what we did. They could do it again with the same thing, couldn't they? No one's going to believe us now. As a bloke who never saw the desk, he's got a napkin into his mouth.

Oh, dear Lord. Yeah, I think I've seen this story a million times, though. We've always been told that they've mastered the growing of the proteins and the blah, blah, blah, blah. This is a picture of a... This is the thing I don't like about it, right? It looks good, and I think the fat... The little fat rhymes on the sides.

Is that actually the steak, though? Or is that just a picture of a steak? Yes, it is. Yeah, yeah, photograph, yeah. Is on the side. Is that actually the steak, though? Or is that just a picture of a steak? Yes, it is. Yeah, yeah, photograph, yeah. I just like the... Why have they seasoned it? Because without the burn marks on the top and the seasoning, it probably looks like something a child would play with

in a child's kitchen. Would you eat it? Yes, yes, I would. I mean, point to anything in this room and i eat it yeah you're the poor person i just think it's i think it's fascinating yeah i think that i just think i've heard this story so many times i'm bored of it the reason for that well that's offensive to what to me fake stick my sweet oh sorry um they've they found apparently chicken nuggets have been made yeah that. That's been done.

Yeah, I see, yeah. I think, apparently, what I love about this, like, sea bass fillets have been made. Oh, that's interesting. Guess where they were made. What do you mean? Guess the geographic location

of where they were made. Lance Bass's house. Nice answer. Lisbon, Portugal. They're obsessed with seafood. Okay. Got to be the seafood capital of the world.

I love the fact that that was done in Lisbon. Oh, nice. Okay. But are you getting... Cheap labor. I get like... Would you not get...

The fish aren't getting paid in other waters. But would it smell of fish, do you reckon? I wonder that. Yeah, would the fish... I mean, presumably it would, wouldn't it? I suppose if they... Or would it be all about what they're eating? Lovely...

The fish are eating the bits and bobs. It's a really good point because for a steak, for example, a big part of it is the smell. If you're 3D making a steak, are you then going to cook it? And if it's made by the same kind of genetic makeup, it's probably just going to do the same thing. You'd think the smell of a steak is all about the process, I suppose. You know, it's protein and fat,

seared and burned and stuff. So that would be most of the smell profile and the taste profile. Fish, fish smells like fish. Very organic smell. Yeah, so it only smells like fish, so I don't know. Oh, it's interesting, isn't it? I heard.

It's interesting. Someone once told me that when you go into McDonald's and you smell the burgers, that's an artificial smell they're pumping out. Why would they bother pumping it out? I thought that. You could be trusted to turn that on. And also in McDonald's, ointment smells of grease, so don't worry about it.

They are cooking stuff in there. Yeah, but like the cook is over there, so you smell it. Yeah. Oh dear. Anyway, on that note, let's have a think about that because that's yeah, the fish thing is a really interesting one. Perhaps people will know. Fiddish. And they'll email in hello at lukeandpeacher.com. What we are going to do is read some of the emails out

that have already been sent in. Whoa. The other side of this break, so don't go away. If you need to know where my brain is, Luke Moore, I've just tried to turn my phone off using the back of the phone. Just try to sort of do that. Very, very weird. What other electronic item even does that anyway?

I don't know. Welcome back to the Luke and Pete Show. We are back with fun games and emails. No games. No games. We're fucking serious here, baby. Do you want to play a game? Do you want to play a game?

Was that Jack Nicholson as Saw? Hey, do you want to play a game? Yes, it was. His little cheeks cock screwed that was Joe Pesci in Moonwalker as sort

I just wanted to be cool yeah yeah what a film that is well worth if you've never watched Moonwalker and you've never

Moonwalker it's got a lot to be said for it should you be endorsing Michael Jackson products at this point he's dead now will he see I'm not worried about him I'm not worried about him his kids a lot to be said for it. Should you be endorsing Michael Jackson products at this point? He's dead now.

Will he see? I'm not worried about him. He won't be claiming from it. I'm not worried about him. His kids, his little kids. I'm worried about his victims. Blanket will get the money. I was in a food market

the other day. We went down to watch a football match and weirdly, the football match was sold out. Right. So we went to a food market

instead, which is just around the corner because they do a particular type of popcorn. It's called Drum and Kernel Popcorn. Shout out to them. Independent business. They make popcorn.

It's their thing. They're great at it. And for balance, I don't like them. Yeah, for balance. You can also buy butter kissed popcorn wherever you want. And at the food market. So for people who are listening to this, you aren't kind of au fait with those big kind of conurbations

in the food market stuff like London and New York and Manchester. Pete, you know instinctively the type of person who runs a food stall at a food market in East Dulwich, right? Beard, glasses, little hat. Yeah, exactly. Noses wear on a coffee grinder. Yeah, yeah. A cunt.

He's got a bike. He's got a bike. He's got a bike, definitely. No, probably not. I shouldn't use that. I shouldn't use that word. Shouldn't use that word. No. But probably, I mean,

an acquired taste of a human being. Is that fair? Someone said that about me and that's fine. Well, you're a man who's eating. Like, I mean, you're there buying his stuff, no? I'm a man who's always eating.

This is a very long run-up towards me saying that there was a guy who was exactly as you described in there. Yeah. He looked exactly like that. I think it was a moustache rather than a beard. Right. Very round circular glasses and a little hat. A little hat.

And a white T-shirt and Doc Martin's shoes, not boots, with trousers too short. Yes. Okay. He was playing loudly and obnoxiously Michael Jackson songs back to back to back at his food store selling what I think were artisan pastry products.

Right, okay. I couldn't really get on board with what his vibe was. What do you mean? Is he trying to make Jackson cool again? And perhaps underestimating the sheer levels of evidence against him being a sexual abuser. Has he just misunderstood the situation? That he's gone out of fashion and come back again?

Yeah. Maybe we're selling some smooth crimen almond croissant. Nice. Keep those coming. I'll stick around. Thank you. Keep those coming, baby. No, I don't know.

Maybe there's some kind of revival in the way. Don't stop till you get a puff pastry yeah okay good yeah don't slow it down baby yeah

man in the mirror raw cacao beans why would he have raw cacao beans put them in I don't know what you put them in

flan in the mirror flan in the mirror that would work alright we'll have it we'll have it no I don't know maybe Jack is coming back Flan in the mirror. Flan in the mirror. That would work. All right, we'll have it. We'll have it. No, I don't know. Maybe Jacker's coming back.

Maybe Jacker's coming back. I don't know. I thought of a really good pun the other day that I can't think of an execution for it, so I'll just say it here. Yeah. So, you know the Beatles song Paperback Writer? Yeah. So, I was thinking that you could do,

It's a really hot curry, so I'm going to need a cucumber writer. Cucumber writer. Works really well, doesn't it? I reckon, the problem is... Cucumber writer will obviously cool the palate down. It's the sort of advert you'd hear for Just Eat on the radio. Yeah, Snoop Dogg would do that. They'd all be raving about it.

Yeah, have we spoken about this before? Just Eat's not Just Eat in the US? What's it called? It's called something else, and he sings the song that's not... It's the... Hang on. Just Eat.

Just Eat is not Just Eat in America. And Snoop Dogg sings a different song. Just Eat... We're big fans of Snoop Dogg on this show, aren't we? Yeah. Always. I like... We were talking about him before

doing oh yeah Menu Log it's called Menu Log that's the shittest name ever Menu Log sounds like a turd Snoop Dogg

I'm going to find the advert there we go here we go so it's exactly the same advert the one you know and love same advert, the one you know and love. Get delivery like a GC. Hungry dogs gotta eat. I get

mines every day, every week. Chicken wings to the crib, I'm sitting in. Tacos to the chateau. I put my fried rice. R-I-M-E-N-U-M-O-G. Somebody say menu log. Menu log.

I think that's a misstep by the good people at Just Eat which came first then? I mean I presume Just Eat is probably a trademark down under in Australia I know the guy who Menu Log I know a guy who I think

is the worldwide marketing director for Just Eat so I could ask him ask him what's going on is that the shittest boast of all time? I think so yeah I know the marketing director for Uber. Actually, I think that's impressive.

That's Uber, man. Huge. How do you square that away with being a man of the people? What do you mean? Employee rights kind of champion. Friend from school's wife is that particular person. Oh, suddenly you don't know him at all now. No, I'm just saying.

I'm just saying that's how that would... Anyway, if you know the worldwide marketing director of any company... Of any company, let's see... Or in fact, maybe you are one yourself. Helloatlookatcomputer.com. Talk us through your process. And can we have a job?

We only know what is terrible about Just Eat and Menu Log. So, like the Menu Log version of Just Eat. I see Just Eat, and I'm going to get in big trouble here. It's very Route 1, isn't it? Just Eat, for crying out loud. I see them as the ITV2 of takeaway apps. What do you mean, next to Deliveroo? I think Deliveroo and Uber Eats are kind of premium.

I think, yeah, but I think... No, Uber Eats. I never use Uber Eats. Why? It's just not on my... That's a car app. With apologies to the head of... But some people market for Uber.

I mentioned literally 20 seconds ago. I feel like you can only get certain places on certain apps, though. Yeah. McDonald's Uber Eats are exclusive at one point. Are they? Right. They were. I know they still are.

I'm a Deliveroo guy with a bit of Just Eat on the side. I don't really flirt with Uber Eats. Maybe I should. There was one near where I live, an independent company called Enjoy, who saw this all coming. They did it for years and they got fucking crowded out.

They don't exist anymore. Yeah. You need backing. You need the capital, baby. You need the capital, baby. So listen, if you have got some capital, email in hello at lukeandpetecher.com.

The people who have emailed in already, they're all in our inbox. They're all on the run and all that. We will get to them when we can. Do you want to do an email from Jeff, Pete? I will do an email from Jeff. Hello, Jeff. Do you see enough Jeffs around these days? I don't think you do.

No. I know one Jeff. I don't know anyone called Jeff, I don't think. I do know one guy called Jeff. He's really into heavy metal music. He's got ACDC stents on the back of his van. Lovely. Good lad. Hey there, little Pete. Based on your's got ACDC stents on the back of his van. Lovely. Good lad.

Hey there, little Pete. Based on your discussion last week, I have a story about American Ninja Warrior. One of my colleagues, who was an American army officer, a present father, and a true enigma, decided to reveal the following at work, dead sober. We'd been working at a very profitable tech company selling software, and he was a star.

One day, he decided to reveal that not only he had been a contestant on american ninja warrior he had to take three weeks or so to train to debut on the new season i asked him how he'd train in the devastating boston winter for this appearance he surprised me with the following my friend said don't worry about it i'm going to the local ninja gym huh i was and i'm still confused as to what a ninja gym is apparently it's a place where these people can focus on jumping from one thing to another. Founded by other ninjas for the express purpose

of trying out for the show. So they've basically recreated what you're going to be experiencing in American Ninja Warrior. He did appear on the show, by the way, but we were required and the new management were not as excited with this business, Ninja. He's not been on TV since. The important question is, does the UK have Ninja gyms?

Love the work in friendship and batteries, Jeff. I think you couldn't be asking two worse people about Ninja gyms. Yeah. I go to the better in West Norwood. I occasionally get a treadmill and do some exercises and I go swimming. That's all I know. I couldn't tell you anything about a Ninja gym, but I do know

that when American Ninja Warrior was first popping off, what a lot of the ninja, what a lot of the aspiring ninja warriors were doing were they were building their own setups in their back gardens,

weren't they? I see. So maybe someone saw a business opportunity there to be honest. I'm looking at, there's a parkour school, a laid back training facility

featuring modular parkour spaces and a fitness area. I'm looking on the reviews, 4.4. Very good. Let's find the area. I'm looking on the reviews. 4.4. Very good. Let's find the lowest. Who's got better? Yes. I think a parkour training center is just like a basically chilled out ninja warrior gym. Just radical dudes.

Rather than alphas. Just tea chests in a lock up in it really. Running around that. Filing cabinet. Filing cabinet. That'd be perfect. With the drawers out. G Strong on Google Reviews says, my son and his friend, both of whom are seven years old,

went to some weekend junior classes. Unfortunately, we won't be returning because they felt underwhelmed by the experience. Parkour's not for kids, baby. It's not for kids. Not enough after one.

After one lesson, the whole class were lectured over their behaviour. The main instructor told them that for 80% of the class, they were misbehaving, and only 20% of the class were practising parkour. Awful experience, serious safety concerns. Awful, truly terrible places. Rob getting involved. I train very regularly in parkour, and because I look pretty fit,

I was automatically put into a harder group on day one. I knew nothing, but I was expected to do some complicated stuff. The coach kept pushing me into things I felt uncomfortable doing, and I didn't know how to get easier versions. I ended up falling, and I fractured my wrist. All I was given was an ice pack and to go on my merry way. And the gym is freezing cold, there are no showers, the toilets are across the road

and it's in the middle of nowhere along a dark road. I think you've hit other sites really sinister. Yes, please. Very enjoyable. Please do not name them. I will not name them.

Don't name the brand. I'm just reading out the fucking... Yeah, yeah. Well, went there. Some manager guy, Dan, I think, was super condescending to me and friends. It was ridiculously expensive and just a bit dirty do you know what I imagine

do you know what roofs are dirty Emma Emily do you know what I imagine the parkour people to be like a bit like the people

who work in a music shop do you know what I mean yeah where they're like really intense like you go into a music store and want to buy a guitar they'll get the guitar down

tune it play it for ages while staring at you in the eyes and you don't know where to look i can imagine you walk into a parkour gym and say hello i'm interested in learning how to do parkour i reckon they'll jump off big height bits just to show you and do like combat ninja turtles i'll tell you what there is a ninja school and i'm going to say it's a 17 league in london's got a 4.9 review thing on Google, and there are no law reviews.

Everyone's over four stars. I cannot recommend Ninja School in Leagate, and they've done some questions and answers on the Google thing. It says, question, do we get to be real ninjas? They haven't answered that. But presumably they can't give away too much information. It's a very secretive profession.

I guess so yeah the other question is do we use katanas and somebody has replied no and that's all we got so you can't be real ninjas

you don't get trained in real ninja stuff and you is this all disrespectful cultural appropriation this what do you mean

because a ninja was like a like a feudal Japan like warrior, right? Yeah, but are there many ninjas kicking around these days? You know what I mean? It's all an affectation, isn't it, I suppose. I'm just looking now.

Surprisingly, in the 17th century, they started to fade into obscurity. Isn't it amazing how they've managed to keep the mystiques now to stay for so long? Yeah, I suppose. I mean, being a feudal assassin for a king, effectively, is a pretty incredible job. They were apparently roles performed by people who were seen as dishonoured

or dishonourable beneath the samurai. Yeah. And so they would do stuff that otherwise samurais would never do. Climb on a roof, have a peek through. Yeah, eat your Snickers. Throw a shuriken. Throw a shuriken. Kick a dog.

In the... Do a little low kick on a dog. Have you seen... Is there a film called... Just kick my dog, Ninja. Yes, I did. Bye. Through the skylight.

See ya. Yeah. Take the dog with you if you want. If you don't want to kick it have you seen the film Dog Soldiers no it's good

right is it like ninjas not really did you just hear the word dog and you went have you seen the film Dog Soldiers no because in that

they train to be SAS or whatever it is it's not said SAS is it SAS but like they got the park hospital at the end I think one of the guys

final challenge I think it's Dog Soldiers I might be getting the film mixed up, but I think it's Dog Soldiers. They make him kill a dog and he won't do it. Oh, I do not like that.

And they call him weak for refusing to shoot the dog. Yeah, I bet. And so it's kind of reminded me of it. There's a Ninja Warrior UK adventure in Watford where it's basically

the set from the TV show. They don't shoot dogs there. They do not shoot dogs there. Pete, that's enough for now. You're reading Google reviews of Ninja Warrior. We've got to get out of here. We'll be back on Thursday with the first of our Christmas-themed shows,

so stick around for that. Jingle our bells. In the meantime, please do take the time to leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. Tell your friends about us. It does really help, and we'd really appreciate it. Look after yourselves for the rest of the week we'll be back with you on thursday

and we'll speak to you then bye The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network.