The Luke and Pete Show - An “Oops!... I Did It Again” moment… (emails special)

Episode Date: July 25, 2022

We promised you an emails special but we spent the first part of today’s show talking about batteries. What else did you expect? We do eventually get round to your emails and share some of your brilliant stories, including a wedding ring lost in a very unpleasant location and a surprising letter home from school which led to some top drawer dad behaviour.Want to contact the show? Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the Luke and Pete Show, it's Monday the 25th of July and I do hope you are keeping well. Pete Donaldson with you, joined by Lukey Moa. Japan. Japan, what about it? Japan, something we didn't get to last week, last Thursday when we were talking about the old batteries and stuff. A bloke in Japan has been arrested

for disposing an unholy amount of batteries in his local canal. This guy, right? He's not even emailed in to us first. What, to tell us how many batteries? What brands they were. This just seems like a waste. He is a man,

I think he's Yamagata Prefecture, and I'm doing this all off the top of my buns because I can't find the email. But the, it was an email, it was a news story. There he is, yeah, that guy. Kyoto.

It was Kyoto, was it? Apologies there. He was a man who manages, get this, he gets through 50 batteries a day. 50 batteries a day. He's just got, he's setting his ways, Luke.

On one sex toy. Well, he's charging his battery on his phone. I mean, I don't care how low voltage a fucking AA battery is. How are you managing to get through 50? Are you Bitcoin mining? Like, how are you getting through 50 batteries every single day? And he was caught throwing them in the canal at like the canal at like 4 30 in the morning that's where he felt comfortable disposing of his batteries he jammed 50 of them in a in a in a

pet a water bottle it's a pet what's the plastic sort of uh bottle um yeah basically yeah a polyurethane um uh water bottle and he's just filled it with AA batteries and he's just hoeing them in the canal. And they've discovered about five or six of these fuckers and he's like, that's only a week's worth

of his disposals. Fucking hell. And he's just throwing them in the canal. The thing I took from the story was how cheap batteries are in Japan. Yeah, I guess so.

Apparently they're the equivalent of about 50p for a pack of 12. He's probably... Really? Double A's, apparently. What? That's not true, is it? Apparently you can buy the packs of 12 in 100 yen shops which are all over japan yeah okay

if you i mean you'd know better than me i've not been to japan i've been to a hundred yen shop but i mean that's insanely uh it's insanely cheap i mean they cut i think the problem there is he's bought very cheap ones well they're not very particularly good ones that's that's going to be part of it the video accompanying the story shows a lot of plastic bottles with batteries in them. There's quite a few Panasonic's in there. Oh, okay. That's all I can really make out.

That's all I can make out. But what an amazing way to spend your time. And just inconveniencing yourself in a massive way, isn't it? I know. Get up at four in the morning. People made the point that pretty much everywhere in Japan, certainly Kyoto, it's a big city, you can just go and get like a phone charger,

like a, not disposable, but like a rechargeable phone charger from a shop. Just get a couple of those and it's actually cheaper than buying 50 batteries

a day. And you said to me once that electric cars are effectively just the floors full of batteries. Floors full of batteries. It's exciting, isn't it? It's kind of odd.

It is kind of odd. I feel like it would be more, I feel like it would be more advanced than that because I remember, I think I remember Elon Musk, I't it? It's kind of odd. It is kind of odd. I feel like it would be more advanced than that because I remember, I think I remember Elon Musk, I think it was Elon Musk, talking about how the future of energy for people's homes is just this big battery unit you stick on the wall of your house.

Yeah. He has a lot of stuff for doing. At the time when he said that, I didn't know how mad he was. Yeah. But at the time it felt really interesting to me because he was saying if you optimise it and all the rest of it

that could be your power for a year kind of thing I mean obviously there's going to be loads of reasons economically while lobbying groups

and the rest of it are going to stop that happening but I find the fact that he says stuff like that and then basically just chucked a load

of batteries on the floor of a car quite disappointing you know what I mean I feel like there should be more to it than that. Yeah, I just think they're more fixable, I suppose, if they're modular. I mean, can I show you this teardown of a 9-volt battery?

You know, the normal smoke alarm batteries, the ones that you can lick the terminal. I know what a 9-volt battery is, Pete. I've been on the show for a while. Well, maybe people, other people, people, other people might not. So this guy is chopping apart a 9 volt battery and I don't think you're across what is

inside a battery of this magnitude. I've never seen one inside. It's just 4, it's just 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Triple A's.

A little bit smaller than a triple A but they're just modular. I feel cheated. I feel absolutely cheated. That's unbelievable. It's mad isn't it?

So it's basically like the equivalent of 6 quadruple A's in one little square package. Rectangular package. And in some lithium batteries, like slightly smaller than AA for like specific purposes that they may need to be

rechargeable or not. These little ones, if you cut them apart, they're just little kind of watch batteries all in serial. This is blowing my mind to pieces. So what happens if you cut a little watch battery, there's loads of tinier batteries in there and they just get smaller and

smaller. That's fucking unbelievable. I'd like to make clear that's not the case with the watch battery but that would be insane.

How do you know? How do I know? I've never cut one apart. You have the pocket of a little battery. Peter, on Thursday's show we did promise

our listeners that today we would do an email special. We started with a couple of battery stories which I think is absolutely fine. Cool beans. But now we're going to get into the email situation.

So helloatlookandpeach.com is the email address if you'd like to be part of one of these sporadic email specials. Okay. We're doing it because we haven't read any emails out for a while because we have had too much stuff to talk about, I suppose. And we are, at our very core, quite undisciplined broadcasters. So that's why this happens. So I'm going to start off with the first email, Peter.

I'm going to read it because it features someone that you don't like. Okay. And I'd like to, obviously, I'd be interested in your reaction to this. We've got some great stuff coming up. But this first one is from Chris, who says, Hi Luke and Pete. Years ago, you were looking for listeners to share their stories about celebrity encounters in toilets. It wasn't years ago, was it? That wasn't that long ago, I were looking for listeners to share their stories about celebrity encounters in toilets.

It wasn't years ago, was it? That wasn't that long ago, I don't think. And then Chris starts off with a dig. I don't remember this being particularly fertile ground. So I didn't send my story in before. But now it's come up again. I thought I'd get in touch. Thanks, Chris. It all takes place in one of Pete's former hangouts,

The Groucho. You don't go to The Groucho anymore, do you? I'm unrepentant. I put my membership on hold, never going to go back. But I'm scared to tell them I'm not going to come back. It's not convenient for you, right? It's not convenient. It's not financially viable.

Yeah. And it's full of absolute wankers. Full of wankers. Yeah. One less wanker. One less wanker. This place has got better. Yeah.

Atmosphere's changed. Chris says he was invited along to some drinks with a New York art dealer friend and a couple of fellow London artists. And then he brackets, actually, now I remember why I didn't send this story in because it's really poncy and I live in Yorkshire and that sort of thing just doesn't go down well now.

Fair enough. After a few drinks, the call of nature came and I visited the little gentleman's room, all fairly ordinary in function and procedure. However, the gentleman I urinated with allowed me the opportunity to deliver a killer line that I would never get the chance to do again. Once I had returned to the group,

I announced with no subtlety, I have just seen Cox in the toilet. I've received looks of confusion and a little pity. And once I had their attention, I continued the sentence, Professor Brian Cox, too much amusement and mild laughter and a story to. And once I had their attention, I continued the sentence, Professor Brian Cox, too much amusement and mild laughter and a story to tell the grandkids.

Thanks for your comforting company and distraction during life's ups and downs, not only during lockdown. Now, Chris, before I get Pete's reaction to this, may I venture that what you probably should have done to make that joke better is just left that out there and had the bravery and confidence

to wait for Brian Cox to come out. Oh, do it in front of him? No, and then people would have seen it and they would have made the connection themselves. That time, you've got to be in the right

part of the conversation to be able to jump in there. You've got to be able to deliver the line under pressure. It's higher risk. Yeah, it is. It is much higher risk.

If the waiter comes over and asks whether you want some Twiglets. Not now. Not now. And Brian Cox, of course, could have come out and turned and gone the other way. Yeah.

So it wouldn't have landed. So fair enough, he went for the safe option. I think it's a good story and a good joke nonetheless, but I think he could have shot for the moon there. If you slayed... Something Brian Cox would have liked, presumably. Certainly, yeah. His little testicles are like two little earths.

They're all blue and green. Do you still... I remember you having some pretty strong opinions on Professor Brian Cox. I don't know, I just can't be arsed with men like him just can't be arsed yeah

men like him what do you mean just clever just men who are everywhere all the time doing everything and everyone's very

excited about them for like they get six months and then they're just everywhere and they never go away yeah youngest ever professor

in the UK say again youngest ever professor in the UK. Say again? Youngest ever professor in the UK. Good. On him. Doesn't mean you should get your own TV show. Exactly.

It puts me in mind of the comedian Bill Burr. Right. He talks about this, but he talks about Neil deGrasse Tyson, who's kind of a similar bit in the US. And he says, I'm not having him. And the guy's speaking. He says,

it's like an interview on a podcast or whatever. And the host is going, why aren't you having him he said because you never see that guy talking to another scientist he's talking to us fucking idiots he could be saying anything

no one questions him I've never seen him in a conversation with another actual scientist and until I do I'm not listening and Brian Cox is kind of the same right

because he's this public understanding of science guy and it really cuts to the core of how we operate as human beings because really

anything we assume to be true and that we accept as true anything even stupid shit like two plus two equals four someone says to you

why? You can't say why. No you can't explain it. So you're trusting it's the same with things like climate change or all this other stuff. Of course like

some people will know it's complete the data behind it, but no one can honestly say generally, the man on the street can't say they know the data. There's a lot of trust there, isn't there? Yeah, exactly. And so Brian Cox is important for that reason,

but that's not why you hated him before. I'll remind you of why you said you hated him before, because you said he looked like he was wearing a death mask of his own face all the time. Yeah, yeah. He looks like he's just had a, you know, a peeling. Yeah. I mean... He can't help that, like he's just had a, you know, a peeling. Yeah. I mean...

He can't help that, can he? If you cut him in half, though, like, just millions of tiny cocks. It's weird. It's weird, it is. There's a couple of tiny cocks in this studio right now.

There certainly is. Patrick in South Dakota. The twin cities of Minnesota are nicknamed such because of the comparably sized cities of Minneapolis and St. Paul about 10 miles apart

separated by the Mississippi River Wazza was in St. Paul this weekend to watch DC United play Minnesota United looking mostly relieved not to be in court Minnesota's standing

supporter section is called the Wonderwall and they sing Wonderwall after every home win. It is inexplicable. That's not the word I would use, Patrick, but thank you for your message. That is funny, isn't it? Yeah, I like it. I've never heard

of anyone from South Dakota before. I wonder what it's like there. Yeah. South Dakota is, do you know what the famous monument in South Dakota is, Pete? Is it like one of those big, giant balls of twine that some villagers decide to make? Yeah, it is, yeah. Next thing you Pete? Is it like one of those big, giant balls of twine that some villagers decide to make? Yeah, it is, yeah.

Next to you now. Is it? It's Mount Rushmore. Oh, of course, yes. Mount Rushmore. Very square state. It's got to be up there as one of the squarest

next to Wyoming. Do you feel disappointed when you see how square the borders are in some US states? Yeah. I feel like it should be more natural.

Yeah. I mean, Montana's a joke. Oh, no, no. Yeah, Montana. Where does Montana end? Montana's bleached into Idaho. What are you doing there? It's right out there.

No, there isn't. There will be a border. I mean, I'm not sure that anyone on earth has ever cared about the border between Montana and Idaho. I'm pretty sure it does exist. But it's like Wyoming is completely bloody square. I mean, that's just magnificently square. And it intersects Yellowstone.

How do you mark that out in Yellowstone? Do you remember that email we had about where there was a situation where, for some kind of weird reason, I think it was in Yellowstone National Park, you could technically commit a murder in that exact spot and no one would take jurisdiction and responsibility for it. That's true, yeah.

So, yeah. If you thought you were going to get whacked you wouldn't get in the car, would you? Speaking of that, by the way, I watched a fucking brilliant documentary on Channel 4. Right. So I got so frustrated, because I am a man

I make no bones about this, I am a man who every three months on average will watch every episode of Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares. Right, okay. But all four's business model online is absolutely obscene. I don't know if you're familiar with it. Okay.

It serves up the most unbelievable amount of adverts you've ever seen in your life. Right? It's... And they're lot... They seem to be longer adverts as well. It's fucking mad. It must not be governed by the adminitage law in broadcasting.

I think it's more exquisite because you get a little timer, which you didn't used to get with, obviously, adverts. The timer annoys the shit out of me. Yeah, because you know it really does. Yeah, it annoys the shit out of me. But if it wasn't there, I think you'd find the adverts more, okay. Three minutes at the start of an episode.

Yeah. Three, four minute breaks in the episode. Yeah. So there's four, eight, that's 15 minutes of adverts

for a 40-ish minute show. That's why I'm downloading stuff that's illegal. I'll say it now. That's a personal opinion. What I did, is I did what they exactly wanted me to do, the bastards.

I now pay £3.99 a month for no ads okay there's loads of stuff on there and the thing is I thought to myself £3.99 a month is expensive

if I'm just watching Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares once every three months so I need to do a deep dive I need to get in there see what's going on and I found this documentary

called Murder in the Alps have you heard of it? no incredible story incredible story and I won't spoil you but I'll give you the premise is that the one where there's like a car And I found this documentary called Murder in the Alps. Have you heard of it? No. Incredible story. Incredible story. And I won't spoil you, but I'll give you the premise. Is that the one where there's a car? A family are killed.

I was talking about this last Friday with somebody, weirdly. A family are... So the mother and father are killed. A random cyclist is killed. And the two daughters survive. Horrific situation. But it looks like an execution, like a hitman style thing. In the middle of a quiet town in the alps and the family are british they're

from surrey uh and um it's about the investigation it's it was i would recommend it to anyone um i was talking to one of the journalists who were out there uh oh really because there were loads of journalists is that who you were talking to about yeah yeah it wasn't the mirror guy was it no it was it was it was mark edmonds who did the Bernie stack show. He was on that as well, was he? He was, yeah. On that case as well? Quite a few.

Did he think it was fascinating as well? Yeah, yeah. Crazy case. It's absolutely insane. Anyway, I won't say anything else because I don't want to give it away, but it's well worth a watch. Next email, Daniel. How far are we?

Do we need to do an ad break? No, we'll do this email first. Daniel, hi to you, Daniel. He says, Eden, lads need to do an outbreak? No, we'll do this email first. Daniel. Hi to you, Daniel. He says, Eden, lads. Long time listener. First time. E-mailer.

I am emailing regarding a school injustice that happened when I was in year eight. It still hurts. Still burns. He says, I'm still working my way through your back catalogue. I'm on episode 194, which according to producer Rory was almost three years ago. So we'll not find out if you've read my email for some time. We're reading it now. So you're going to have quite the wait until you hear it,

but you are going to hear it. While at school in IT, me and my friends happened across a fake porn pic of Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. He's written Christina Aguilera. He's written Christine Aguilera. It's Christina Aguilera and a dildo, which he spelled correctly. I think he has spelled Aguilera. It's Christina Aguilera and a dildo, which he spelt correctly.

I think he has spelt Aguilera. That's on me. Sorry, Daniel. I'm very sorry about that. I will start the sentence again. While at school in an IT lesson, me and my friends happened across a fake porn pic of Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera and a dildo. We were supposed to make a music poster

and decided we would add pics of famous singers. Innocent motive, I swear. While searching for pics of Britney Spears, we happened across the offending picture which involved two women and the photoshopped heads of the two singers. Needless to say, we were beside ourselves and grabbed all the other lads in class to have a look.

The lesson ended and we thought nothing of it until the next day. One of the lads in our to have a look the lesson ended and we thought nothing of it until the next day one of the lads in our group then went home printed it off full size and full color and then carried it into school the next day this is classic banter classic school banter this was fine until one of the teachers proceeded to find it in a p locker that very same day and call our entire class in for interrogation she was absolutely terrifying and we folded like a deck of cards as she proceeded to inform us how horrified her mother would be for her to have seen it. This resulted in a letter home

to my parents which I've attached with me alongside the other lads being placed in isolation where the only means of entertainment was to play Connect Four with the teacher. My dad was very angry, or so he told me. I marched up to school to confront them on the basis they failed to protect their delicate son from harmful content. It's a great dad move. Upon arrival at the school he was asked I marched up to school to confront them on the basis they failed to protect their delicate son from harmful content

it's a great dad move upon arrival at the school he was asked to wait next to the staff room where he heard the teachers all having a laugh at our expense needless to say

their laughter subsided when my dad strode in and informed them it was his son they were laughing at and proceeded to lecture them on their failure to protect children

from harmful content online when he got home I thought the punishment had passed for me being an innocent party, but I was still in isolation and I was grounded for a week. Over the rest of my childhood,

my family still referred to me as getting in trouble as an oops, I did it again moment. And the lesson is if you find such images, keep them at home and don't enlarge

and print them off in full colour. Yeah, that's bare minimum. My wife finds the story hilarious and has the letter from the school framed on her desk and I can confirm the image is still available online for research purposes i hope you're both well i love

the show uh so i'll read this i'll read the email very quickly um dear mr and mrs jones i'm writing to you to confirm the content of a conversation we had on wednesday evening 4th december during the morning of wednesday 4th december i was called to the pe department where it was clear that a number of boys had been looking at a pornographic picture that had been printed from the internet this is dated the 5th of december 2002 by the way so still very early in the internet's uh life the boys were not being forthcoming in admitting to their teachers who was responsible as a result i spoke to the class and one boy put up his hand and admitted that he had

found the picture by a bin in school and had been showing it around he later altered that admission keen to admission keen to tell the truth and informed me that it was not in fact correct and he had printed the picture off at home brought it into school and showed it to a few of his friends the boy had accessed this site in school with your son daniel during a lesson when they were looking for information on britney spears the pornographic site came up and neither child reported this to the member of staff. The other boy then went home and decided to print off and bring it to school. Clearly, this is a serious situation as material of this kind is totally unacceptable and must not and should not be ever be brought into school. Daniel understands this and I found him to be honest and

truthful in relation to this matter. Grass. He was keen to apologise to me and for me to understand that he had made a stupid mistake and did in fact now realise how serious the circulation of the material can be. He also understands that he should have reported this to a member of staff. However, Daniel realises that because he was keen to outline his involvement from the beginning and provided me with enough detail, blah, blah, blah, etc, etc. Letter home from school about a porn pic. Pete Donaldson. It's good stuff. And, blah, blah, blah, et cetera, et cetera. Letter home from school about a porn pic. Pete Donaldson.

It's good stuff. And, yeah, still available. I mean, just choose better heads, guys. If you're going to do this sort of thing, just choose better heads. She looks like she's being tickled.

I also think that should the school bear some responsibility for that? How have they not even got a safe search on at school? Yeah, but it might have been like the wild west, like, you know, back in the day when the wild, you know, you could... 2002.

2002. Oh, okay, was it? Okay, right. Well, yeah, I mean, that was... It was like the wild west out there, I suppose. It was probably much easier to find that sort of thing. But yeah, an astonishing bit of work from the teachers. I can never be a teacher because I can never type that letter.

I just, I could not bring myself. Like, the letter just needs to go, come on, mate. Yeah. It's like, just fucking come on.

It's got to be the acceptable equivalent of, I've got to write this letter, I don't want to write it, you don't want to read it, but we've got to do it, and here we are. Thanks very much,

you're all sincere, don't do it again. That's it, isn't it? Yeah, the kind of like, if you sort of like when we all die and like the thing

that's left behind will be that letter and not us and the oral history of that situation will be more human and more kind of like understanding

but the admin is the only thing that's left behind and it's very it's very sort of like well do you reckon it'll be people who interpret that

in a hundred years to go this is what school was like in 2002 exactly and you know big summit go, this is what school was like in 2002? Exactly. And there were big summit meetings about this stuff. It's just like, it's not how kind of people work, I suppose, is it? So it's, yeah, it's a real shit. You must have been guilty of this kind of thing yourself at school, Peter.

I don't remember ever finding pornographic stuff. I honestly don't think, when I was using computers back in the day, that there was a... I didn't think it was really out there, that sort of thing, to be honest, at the point in which I was...

What, even a little kind of... When I was in year eight. A little pixelated JPEG. Nah. Two pages to load. I was on the Olga. What's that, a pair of boobies? I was on the Olga,

the online guitar archive. Oh, I used to use that all the time. They just print out reams and reams of... I used to do that all the time. ...guitar.

Did that turn into Ultimate Tab? Ultimate Tabs? Yeah, probably. They probably used the same thing. Those tabs would have been written in the fucking 90s, early 90s, and they sort of found their way... Because it would have started as a Usenet group or something.

It would have started as an old CD or something. It's just amazing that those things would have been adopted on the internet and could become part of something way bigger and way more commercial. I've got beep with ultimate tabs. Right. Ultimate guitar tabs, whatever it's called.

The quality control's really poor. Right. So you've got a system where you upload, so people will upload guitar tabs they've worked out for well-known songs, right? Popular songs. And there'll be a star system on the side of each tab. Yes.

And there'll be those different versions. And obviously, generally speaking, if it gets a better mark, it's a better tab. But there are some in there that are so obviously wrong, and then they'll put at the bottom, and they've been up there for like 15 years, they'll put at the bottom, have you got any suggestions for improvements? Just email me guitarlegend.hotmail.com. Yeah, that email doesn't mean it's for years. The amount of times, it's surprising to me, this is a really that email doesn't mean it's for years the amount of times

it's surprising to me this is a really nerdy point but it's surprising to me that if you sit there put some music on I want to play that song and you work up the guitar tab next to the song

it's so obviously wrong I don't understand why people are so arrogant to upload it yeah but I mean but you think people are torn deaf aren't they

so they think they're right they think they well they can't be anything else they shouldn't be in listen that's like saying people are shit at football they're not playing the. They think they can't be anything else. They shouldn't be in... Listen, that's like saying people are shit in football. They're not playing in the Premier League, are they?

They shouldn't be on the... This isn't Premier League football. This is having a kick around at the park. We're staying five blocks from the Villanova WhatsApp group. Villanova? Yeah. What's it called that? I don't know.

I think you found a Brazilian team from down in the leagues. Speaking of that, you know that I remember I told you guys. Very Sunday league that, isn't it? Yeah, big time. Very Sunday league. Do you remember I

told everyone about that tour that my old football team went on? Right. They just stopped uploading Instagram pics.

Halfway through. I don't know what's happening. I need to find out what went on. Death. Yeah, because it feels like there's

an abandoned car. People, they were really enthusiastic about it. And they just stopped. Anyway, can we squeeze one more

email in? Yeah. You do it. It's the wedding ring oh actually before we get the wedding ring we don't have break no

we'll be back in a second yeah people aren't going to bother own each step with Peloton from their pop runs to walk and talks you define what it means

to be a runner whatever your level embrace it journey starts when you say so if you've got five minutes or 50 peloton tread has workouts you can work in or bring your classes with you for outdoor runs walks and hikes led by expert instructors on the peloton app call yourself a runner peloton all access membership separate learn more at one peloton.ca slash running the Peloton app. Call yourself a runner. Peloton all access membership separate. Learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running. Hello, it's Pete and Luke with the chore.

How are you doing? Before we get to our final email, this morning, hot day, taking Buckley, the 15-year-old dog, for a walk. And I realized that the little kind of of canister that's connected to the lead didn't have any poo bags. I was like, shit. They did a poo outside just around the corner from my house.

Did a poo outside someone's house. I was like, shit. Literally. Dragged Buckley back. I finished the walk and walked back. And then on my way to work, got on the old Scoot Scoot down the road

and my neighbour waved at me, hello, Neil, on the corner. I went, hello, mate. And then he just saw me stop randomly in the street. Pick up a shit. Pick up a shit

and then scoot off. Just looking really furtive. Like I'm the poo stealer. I'm spotting a poo in there. The scooter's exhausted. Oh, dear. It's not a good look, just stealing poos. At least it wasn't dark.

At least it wasn't dark. Because that would look really odd. That would have looked even worse. But the poo thief. Yeah. Very good. This email you're about to read, Pete, has got a similar kind of vibe.

It's from Sadiq. Thank you, Sadiq. Hi, look at Pete. Listening to the last episode where Pete mentioned the video of the sewage pipe reminded me of a story that happened to me that y'all might enjoy. First weekend in my new job

at a big sports retailer. It was the morning shift and I urgently needed to take a shit. As it was my first week, I hadn't got the access card to bypass the lock door to get in the office and staff lounge where the staff toilets are, so I headed out to use the public toilet located outside of the building. done doing the business i decided i should take off my wedding ring before i wash my hands so at this point i'm still seated on the toilet

pants around my ankles while removing the ring from my left hand it slips clink clink bloop it hit the toilet seat twice before falling at the toilet bowl. I took a minute to compose myself and figure out the next cause of action. I decided the best way forward was to turn my phone flashlight on and see if I could get a glimpse of the ring, and then I'll figure out how to fish it out. As I stood up with my pants still around my ankles, mind you, my flashlight ready to shine at the bowl, I heard the click of the automatic flush.

Oh, killer, that's a stinker. In the spur of the moment, in blind panic, what my wife would have to say when I told her I lost my wedding ring in the crapper. I shot my arm into the ball, threw the literal shit and managed to grab onto something solid. As I felt the rest of the sludge flush down the pipe, I was beyond relieved when I looked down

and I was holding onto my wedding ring, a cautionary tale never to remove jewellery in precarious situations. Keep up the good work. I've got no batteries in my hand as I'm writing this email in my parked car because my wife finds it very odd that a 30-year-old man writes emails to podcast shows. Yes, they're in secret.

I guess, like, if you're... I don't wear jewellery because I'm not married, but if you put, like, a wedding ring on, like, surely you'd want to wash the wedding ring as well, wouldn't you? Yeah, I wouldn't, so I don't take my wedding ring off to wash my hands. Yeah, okay. But when I get home, I'll take it off and put it in a little tray thing.

Oh, do you? Jewelry, little jewelry tray, yeah. It's quite awkward having that on all the time, I think. But then my, so LC, my father-in-law, and my dad, they would literally never take theirs off. Yeah. So I think it depends. but then my LC my father-in-law and my dad they would literally never take theirs off so I think it depends I find if I think about jewellery

I find it very oppressive whenever I start to think about it this necklace has been alright but like anything on the hands I just can't yeah it does take a bit

of getting used to I think that never take it off in public because you're going to it's going to it's one of those things things are going to happen to it I mean that's a particularly horrific version of that story but i've heard so

many people doing it um but i tell you what on that note i this necklace here uh me me and my wife got for me ages ago it's actually got a lot of sentimental value to me and um um for reasons i can't be asked to go into and no one will find interesting but anyway i i lost it i was like gut it i was fucking gutted about it i genuinely really upset i can imagine yeah and um and i didn't know where it'd gone and i spoke to loads of people who you know who see me wearing it and i tried to piece the piece the um piece the um story together and i was like i'm pretty sure i had it on in the morning when i left the house to come into work but when i was on i think i was doing a ramble and i remember reaching for it and it wasn't there. And I was like,

oh, fucking hell, what's happened? So I thought, what's happened is I must have lost it on the way to the train station because I remember on the train having it on.

Spoiler, I didn't have it on. But I thought I did. So I told my wife and she said, oh, it's a real shame. And she could see how upset I was.

She started looking for replacement ones and all the rest of it. But she was really lovely about it. She was like, look, I'm going to try and find it for you so she went onto the

street WhatsApp group and sent a message around saying that it might have been dropped between our house and the train station of which the majority of that walk is on our street

so please get your eye out for it and all these people were replying and really lovely saying oh yeah of course we will and I just had this image of people just looking out

for it while they're walking their dog or going to work about five minutes after that i found it wrapped up on a pair of jeans nice i obviously thought i was gonna wear yeah put back in the wardrobe not worn because maybe i put shorts on or something right and i was like oh fucking hell i said to me look this is what's happened i frightened around my neck i said i said i'm gonna front up to you yeah do you mind if I don't message to what's happening because I've never once sent a message

ever in the history of the group so they're just going to think I'm a complete fucking moron that's my only contribution you're going to look like me in the morning

just looking around for shitsters looking around the streets so we compromised on me not fronting up on the what's happening could you not do like a little kind of

vignette of you kind of in the street going I found it not really overacting. Yeah exactly. Can you believe it? It's from this cat's neck.

Anyway let's get out of it that's it. We're done. We'll be back on Thursday. Farewell. Thank you very much indeed for listening.

It's hello at LukeandPeteShow.com if you do want to email in. We are at Luke and Pete Show on the old social medias. Much thanks to

producer Rory. Does all the hard yards. Does, yeah. Thank you to everyone at Stack as well. And thank you, most importantly, for listening. And we will see you next time. Say goodbye, Peter. Goodbye.

Goodbye from me as well. The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack Production and part of the Acast Creator Network. Own each step with Peloton. From their pop runs to walk and talks, you define what it means to be a runner. Whatever your level, embrace it. Journey starts when you say so. If you've got five minutes or 50, Peloton Tread has workouts you can work in

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