The Luke and Pete Show - Brassy Steampunk Cows

Episode Date: July 5, 2021

On today’s show, while Luke’s been away spending time with some steampunk farm animals, Pete’s tells us about his recent DIY kitchen work. Elsewhere, the boys go shopping in an Amazon supermarket, Luke shares news about his catastrophic beef-eating experience, and we get to some of your *very* EXCITING EMAILS. GET IN TOUCH! Drop us an email over at [e-mail] or give us a message on our Instagram/Twitter @lukeandpeteshow. We LOVE hearing your nonsense.Produced by Natalie Wilson Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

have you got a uefa access code have you got a uefa access code that's what the ticket portal on the uefa.com website says yeah it's just um a lot of people don't know this but if you want to get tickets it's just the word password password okay let me try that yeah they forgot to change it so um and that's also to get a secret high-profile VIP access as well. If you just type in password and you say you want it, you get to take the kick-off in the final. Do you get to drive that little car? Yeah, you do.

Two of them, you get to skate around on them. Imagine that. You can't even drive that car because you're a test. Is that only what it started reminding me of one of my many modern failures oh what's calling the million dollars

person you're driving is it still is it still a raw wound yeah I think so it's become infected over time I've got staph infection MRSA all over the gaff

yeah it's inhabited the entirety of my body and I just feel very lethargic and very unwell how does it manifest itself it just means

you really really can't drive even worse than before how are you doing it's the Luke and Pete show it's the Luke and Pete show it's Monday

I'm doing good had a good weekend drinking out my Luke mug nice lovely producer that got made especially for me I've got my cup at home

we bought new mugs and I don't know whether to use the new mugs because they're nice, but I don't want to smash them, or the old standard, the Newcastle United mug, or the Pete mug. I had a very fraught conversation

with my lovely wife yesterday regarding drinkware. As I believe no one calls it. Okay, right, yeah. Glassware, I guess. I'll tell you something. I'll tell you what's been going on. I'll tell you what's been going on. There are letters in that. I'll tell I tell you what's been going on there are letters in that

I tell you something what's been going on and you may be a new listener to this show and you think hang on a minute I'm a couple of minutes in and they're talking about mugs and glasses at home mugs and hugs

it's probably they're probably thinking that oh they're just easing us in there's going to be some really good content later it's all like this they've made that absolutely clear mug chat but anyway thinking that, oh, they're just easing us in. There's going to be some really good content later. It's all like this. They've made that absolutely clear.

But anyway, I think that it creeps up on you, the amount of glasses that get broken throughout your home life, until one minute the penny just drops. And you've got one wine glass left. Yeah, I've got none left. And that happened to me yesterday. Right. I said to Mimi, I said, where the fucking glass is gone? Here!

Well, you know that glass that you wrapped around my head last week? Did it break? But no, we had a situation, Pete, where we had, she had a glass. You tried to coax a spider out of the house and you didn't have anything to hold it in. One glass for her, one glass in the dishwasher. That was on a cycle. No glass for Lukey. You have an aerolator?

So I said, let's get, excuse the aerolator. Let's get some more glasses in. She said, well, you could do it. And I said, I could do it. And then the conversation went on. But they had to go into detail on that front. Right. But the point is...

What, is this kind of like, are you not pulling your weight in the house? Is that the situation? It's a considerable weight to pull. I like when people take that into account. No, exactly. Yeah, I mean, I reckon I could pull Mimi's weight. I can't pull yours.

Anyone could pull Mimi's weight. But you can't pull mine. No. A strong wind could probably. Paddy McGuinness, Paul Shane, and one other celebrity would be needed to pull mine. Why are you talking about Paul Shane? Beep, beep, beep. All morning he's been talking about bloody Paul Shane.

It's ridiculous. Anyway, so I'm going to buy some more glasses. We only had one wine glass left and it had like a little shark. I bought some cool shark wine glasses. It just makes it harder to clean. From Wish. From Wish.com, yeah. I find wine glasses astonishingly hard to clean anyway.

Yeah. I don't know how they do it. I can't put the ones we've got in the dishwasher because we don't drink that much wine at home. Mimi has the occasional glass. She's got like two or three common old garden wine glasses she uses, right? If I'm drinking wine,

it's normally because people are over and we use the nice wine glasses but because of the stems, you can't put them in the dishwasher. It's impossible to clean them without a dishwasher.

I got a dishwasher. I'll level with you. I have joined the ranks of the dishwashies. Good man. Move house. Great time to do it. You got a built in?

You got a double or a single? No, it's a double, I think. There's a lot of room for appliances. We got a washing machine and a dishwasher. But the problem is... You got a dryer? No, a washing machine and a dishwasher. But the dishwasher was only there because

there's literally no drying place for the stuff. It's just a sink next to an oven. It's got a hob right next to the sink. It's very confusing. I was like, why have they done that there's no place to put but I realised obviously they had a dishwasher

and I'm not against dishwashers but I was like it's just a bit of a waste again it's a fool's errand first of all before I get into why it's a fool's errand what do you go for Biko

uh Bosch I think Bosch okay solid the reason it's a fool's errand because assuming that everything can be done in the dishwasher

nah you can't fit everything in the dishwasher and not everything't fit everything in the dishwasher and not everything is dishwasher friendly so you need a draining area you need a draining area for your pots and pans

and stuff yeah but the but the guy the guy turns up and he is who is the guy the guy is someone

from Amazon like I did Amazon with like come onto your house now yeah and you put that's how yeah

and if you add an extra 40 quid, they will install it for you. I could happily install a dishwasher. I'm not that shit. Disagree. That's... I wish for the purposes of this show, you did try and install it yourself.

Well, to be honest, I probably could have done a better job than these absolute lunatics. Turns up, the waist pipe is too short, so he needs a small waist pipe. He doesn't have that, obviously, because it's off the peg.

But the problem is, he can't explain that to my partner because he literally doesn't speak any English. So he has an intermediary who has slightly better English than him, but still not great. You're the intermediary here, aren't you? And then it ended up with

with the guy just spraying water all over Sarah a lot of dance music class to bring 98 oh lovely yeah they deserve that

I always pay the extra 40 quid to take the old thing away that was the other thing yeah in broken in the most broken

English because I get on the phone because Sarah a bit brexity over there. I mean, it's not... Again, you know my feelings on xenophobia, but my God, the guy couldn't communicate what the problem was.

And his intermediary couldn't. You need at least to be able to do that. Did you apologise? What? Of course I did. Yeah, you were probably apologising quite a lot. His intermediary was lovely. But again,

she would use words that I was like, what does that mean? And I was sort of like thinking around stuff, thinking laterally Demidji was lovely. But again, she would use words that I was like, what does that mean? And I was sort of like thinking around stuff, thinking laterally about what she was saying. I was like, oh, it's that. That's what I have to be presenting with you. Exactly, exactly. What does that mean?

But that was another problem. Then I'd go on, there's a big problem. We need to take something away for recycling. Because part of the service was take that away and plumb it in. And they were like, we need to take something away for recycling so because the part of the service was take that away yeah and and and plummet in yeah and and they were like like we need to take something away i was going there's nothing there don't worry about it we're going well what will our managers say and i was like probably have the afternoon off i don't care yeah it's not your problem is it no there's nothing to take away if you want to take something away take the cardboard boxes they're outside take that to the recycling if you want to take something away take the cardboard boxes that are outside take that to the recycling if you have to take something away

yeah oh stressful let me get this right so he was basically saying that he would get in trouble for not taking anything away for not taking something away I mean

he could have been saying anything I've not a clue but I just feel guilty because I wasn't there so it's working now it's working now because I went and got a pipe

and went and connected it together and wow you must have had a great sense of achievement there. I've connected a washing machine. No, but if I do anything like that, I feel like I'm cock of the walk for a week. It's just a little tube.

I remember one of the best moments of my life was when Mimi was having a go at me for not being able to do anything around the house, which I can't. And I know her dad will be listening, the great Elsie. So hello to you, Elsie. Yes, I know. Compared to you, I can do nothing. Because Mimi's dad will be like, I mean, I've So hello to you, Elsie. Yes, I know, compared to you, I can do nothing. Because Mimi's dad will be like, I mean, I've said this to you before,

he'll just decide that he's got a few days off in a month's time so he's going to, from scratch, completely redo the kitchen himself. Yeah. Oh, it's incredible.

I would say in our defence, our homes are a little bit more bricky and a bit more like structural. Mimi had a go at me once for not being able to do anything, but she had a go at me in the spare room, which I painted, put the light fitting on, put the shelf up. Thank you. I was a go at me once for not being able to do anything but she had a go at me in the spare room which I painted

put the light fitting on put the shelf up I was like excuse me have a little look around it couldn't have been better. Who met with that little telly? Who met with that little telly?

Like Farage's telly in the kitchen. Yeah it is a bit like that actually and yes it is a little bit angled. Right okay. Look that's angled for your pleasure. I don't mind it. I prefer my TV like that.

If it falls on my feet or the cat, it's our decision for that to happen. But I am terrible around the house, so anything like that would be a great sense of achievement for me. I see this wall here, all this stuff. I need a place to record in the outbuilding, which is my home. The garage.

The garage. And I'm sort of like going, right, I'm going to build a structure like this. I'm going to build two walls of this to block off half of it. And I'm thinking, I'm going to go to Wix and I'm going to get timber, right? So I need to get timber to make the framework. I need rock water to go inside because that's what's in these walls in our studio. And then some kind of thing to tie it together.

Do you know sometimes on the front page of a newspaper, the bottom half of the newspaper will be a big story about the government and the top half will just be an aerial photo of a newspaper, the bottom half of the newspaper will be a big story about the government. And the top half will just be an aerial photo of a house that's fallen down. And say like a few feared missing or whatever. Carry on. That's what's going to happen here. It's not. Look, it'll be fine.

But I don't know. Maybe somebody can get in touch because this show goes out today. Give us a tweet. How do I put the timber together? Is it big long nails or big long screws? What's the best? Yeah, what's your cut off there? What?

Exactly. I think it would be screws, wouldn't it, surely? I don't know because you see, I think people sort of put it together with nails and then fortify it with screws. Maybe no more nails would suffice. I just can't see. I think I speak on behalf of the Luke and Pete show community

when I say I can't see this ending well. You're going to be astonished with how lumpy these waters are with Rockwell. I hope it does go well, because it means you'll never have to come in again. Because you'll be able to do everything you can from home. But anyway, listen, it's Monday the 5th of July. This is the Luke and Pete show. I've been seeing Alan Jones' cock today.

Well, I was going to ask you about that. Would you please... Because you avowed me of this story earlier today. I didn't know about it. is cock today well i was going to ask you about right would you please because you you availed me of this story earlier today i didn't know about it there will be people listening here who are from the beautiful sunny uh country australia for example okay or or the deepest darkest place in scotland hell right so they may not abandon if you're scottish you're gonna know who ala jones is for those who aren't in the UK tell us the Aled Jones story who is he first and foremost

he is a celebrated voice I suppose of like classical ditties start with the snowman did he get his he was a kid in Aled in

God was that the kid then snowman that was the kid from the snowman walking in the air that guy right people get older in time yeah but I mean

he's about our age isn't he yeah he's maintained his kind of fame for a very, very long time. Good on him. Yeah, because he did the Christian thing. Yes. So what happens is, in broadcasting terms or fame terms, as a kid you can do what you want. If you're talented, then you have to specialise. Yes.

For example, Alex Zane, film. Right. Rick Edwards, science. True. People like the guy from Blue Peter, football. Hammond, cars. What was Hamm like the guy from Blue Peter, football. Hammond, cars. What was Hammond doing when he was younger, though? I don't know, to be honest.

He screams to me that he was doing a BTEC at some kind of provincial college. Rich. Well, it takes one to know one. And worked at Bella Italia. Oh, nice. I like that. I've made that up.

That could have been what happened. He doesn't really count. But people who get fame in broadcasting or something else younger, they have to specialise as they get older. Ali Jones specialised as a Christian. He took his fame from the snowman, went through, before you know it, bang, songs of praise.

Songs of praise. God man. Songs of praise. Songman. Anyway, what's he done? On his reels, which I believe is kind of like a 24-hour kind of disposable version of the tweet. That's Fleets, isn't it? Fleets, sorry. Reels is Instagram.

Sorry. I have to hold your hand for all this stuff. I just never used any of them. Fleets. Fleets. A man in some Calvin Klein briefs was seen. Very well endowed. Yeah, it looked like it was a little bit of padding, maybe.

I'm not going to cast aspersions to whoever the junker that was but he also had a t-shirt like a dirty t-shirt tucked into his Calvin Klein pants as well which I did really get

so it was on his reels he's done the classic thing that all men of a certain age do when something awry appears on someone's

twitters saying hashtag hacked I was hacked oh my god put on two factor authentication I was hacked I'm my God, put on two-factor authentication, I was hacked.

Yeah. I'm sure it wasn't his willy. I'm sure it wasn't his bulge. But it's just, why do they always go with hacked? The lion wasn't out of the cage anyway. Say again. No, exactly.

Yeah. But the reason they always go with hacked, as I'll tell you, as a man approaching middle age myself, men of our age and older get regularly teased for being shit with technology. Turn it to your advantage.

I'm a boomer. I know nothing about tech. I obviously got hacked. Oh, did I press the wrong button on my printer? Is that what happened? And it was crotch level and I was in my pants. Oh, how did that sexy lady in a gif

get onto my screen? I don't know what I was doing. I was enjoying it. For the England match I was round a mate's house and he's making these lovely ribs he's got this brand new house and it's like a hitman

it was massive he wasn't making ribs was he hopefully he was cooking them he's cooking them sorry stay away from the grill he was making them

but he was going he was sort of talking waxing lyrical about how many like sexy ladies is on his Instagram like his kind of you know the algorithm

just throws up loads of shit and I was like based on his earlier browsing exactly and he was saying that in front of his partner and I was like mate that's all on your

and he was beautifully trying to tiptoe around and go I've no idea how these sexy ladies get on we did that before you me and our mate and our mate got

in his algorithm on Instagram just got a load of meat being grilled at houses different property porn yeah but he's doing it in front of his partner

he's like I mean that's risky she's a consulting surgeon she knows what's going on well that's probably helping with the ribs was she these are forensically cut

very well rendered yeah the apotheosis of the genre I think we can all agree being that conservative MP who went on a bit got on his high horse on Twitter

and went I cannot believe how many obscene adverts I'm being sent on my internet websites. And someone was like, yeah, it's based on your browser. But wasn't it like, wasn't it like a home,

like he wrote our Jews and then it was like, you know, I did, or did the Holocaust happen or something like that? Oh, that's right. And he had a little timer, a little logo for a timer saying,

you literally fucking typed that in, you fucking psychopath. Yeah. Jeez. It's backfired that did you not thought about it there's not there is always

I mean I don't have anything seditious or problematic on my phone but there's enough like men's knobs and stuff that could sneak out

and it's not my knob you think that you do have a lot of problematic stuff on your phone but it's just not problematic to you if people saw that

out of context oh yes you'd be in big trouble. I would. Buddy boy. Buddy Bo. Anything in my gallery, I'd go, yeah, that is... I mean, my wallpaper is Vish in a Man United hat.

Yeah, I mean, that's troubling. That's troubling. It's really low res as well. Why have you got Vish on there? What does Sarah think when she sees that? She's been used to it. She used to be on there. Yeah, you changed it for a man that you work with anyway

the core presenter I have access to anyway I keep wanting to say it's Monday the 5th of July this is a Luke and Pete show but we're halfway through

the episode now so there's no point it's like one of those really pretentious cold opens in a big blockbusting Netflix series isn't it

it is indeed I tracked that once and I was re-watching Breaking Bad a while back and at some point there were like still opening credits on the episode

like 18 minutes in right yeah that's a bit crazy absolutely crazy in TV they're obsessed with getting credits aren't they

obsessed with getting credit for everything it's always built into deals and stuff does it help you in the future if you get a credit as you know

exec producer or whatever it's a big part of their career I think and also I think because TV's so old as a genre, I mean, I haven't been privy to that much

of this kind of stuff. But when you're doing deals for shows in this game that we're in and it gets optioned for TV or derivative rights or whatever, the amount of TV people

that want to get involved is incredible. Right. So for us, we make podcasts, just a few of us, right? You made the Burnley show and it's just you and one other person

or whatever and someone else to help with the sound design whatever you did an amazing job my point is if that was TV there'd be about 15 people

doing it and you can tell that on things like so for example Gladwell's podcast Revisionist History it's Pushkin I think he's

a lot of the team he's got a lot of background in other areas of the media if you listen to the credits of the end of an episode of Revisionist History, I mean,

I've counted them because I'm pathetic like that. On one of the episodes, I heard they had 17 credits for one podcast episode. It's an attaboy though and it's kind of like, we're not going to pay you

much money. But in America, they do pay him. There's loads of money in media in America. I don't know what you mean. I don't know. I just think sometimes your work's got to speak for itself and if you, you know America they do pay them. There's loads of money in media and pen in America. I don't know what you mean. I just think sometimes

your work's got to speak for itself and if you know you've got personal satisfaction. I can't believe you're saying that on this show.

It's got to speak for itself. We need to obfuscate Pete. True. We need to obfuscate him. It certainly doesn't

in this case. Good Lord. Can I ask you quickly before we go to a break. Yes. I just want to let you know

because I think you'd be able I took a photo of it but I forgot to send it to you because i've been a bit busy and uh got on your reels did it in your fleets i saw um so i was in cambridge at the weekend and um have you seen did you see in london a while back when they had um the wallace and grommet sheep all over all over the country yes yes couple in in London. It was for the charity to do with Ardman. I think it's based in Bristol. My friend's wife does a lot of great work for it.

Anyways, check it out. It's a great charity. There was a cow version in Cambridge at the weekend. Right. And cows, like brass statues of cows. Ooh, the brass cow on it. Exactly. That's what I thought.

Dotted around the city. And one of them was a steampunk one. A steampunk cow. Top hat, cogs, glasses, goggles. Goggles.

Like, you know, like, I can't imagine it. This is hard to imagine and this is definitely one for the Luke and Pooch are out of context

Twitter if it ever happens. Imagine a cow in a waistcoat but the waistcoat is like a riveted metal waistcoat. It was like that with goggles. I justcoat with goggles I just

thought you I just thought you were steampunk I appreciate that mate the big things that everyone listens to the show knows you for steampunk peaky

blinders only fools and horses that's your kind of area it's not a single day that goes by that somebody doesn't tweet me something about the only fools and horses

it stopped how many series were there and it just stopped years ago you would know you would know I always I always i always tattoo people should never refrain from messaging you any kind of only fours and horses news we can always assume you've seen it you've probably got a google alert set up but it's always pays to make sure yeah um so anyway listen let's have a quick break i want to tell you about the steampunk cow before we did so in the break peachy then just check up

on these only fours and horses stuff uh when we come back we'll do some of your emails Alright we're back it's the Luke and Pete Show part two Luke I'm asking you this question I've got through to the UEFA Euro 2020

ticket portal You're joking But the only tickets are available at least It's been like that for like 24 hours now Really? Just Italy and Spain?

Yeah so I believe I mean by the time this show comes out it may not be the case but I believe that there is an expectation that the Danish FIA

are going to send some tickets back if they do they should be put out on the portal I see so if you're listening to this and you are

in some way an England fan and you are you're based in the UK keep an eye on it actually no I'll want to get them don't keep an eye on it

there's no point don't worry about it don't go on the portal there's no chance nothing's happening you might as well close that down now Donny do I want to watch that though't keep it on there's no point don't worry about it don't go on the portal there's no chance nothing's happening you might as well close that down now Donny do I want to watch that though

it's quite expensive nah fuck it I'll watch it on the telly anyway there are some cheap ones they're fans first tickets you know for competition so like 80 euros

that's good that's cheap I mean they're not that now they're like 300 quid but yeah anyway oh well hello at lukeandpete show.com

is the email address that you can get in touch with us on. We are at LukeandPeteShow on Twitter, as I'm sure you know by now, but we should remind people of that in case they're new to the show. If you are new to the show, this is a part of the episode

where we do people's emails and correspondence. This is a half-hour show twice a week about absolutely nothing, but we do do your emails. Do you want me to go first, Peter, or would you like to go first? I'll slide in a couple of very very quick ones

because I'm always sort of we don't sort of go through the little steady hello this is from Dave hello do you think Luke looks like a comedian called Paul Smith

have a google yes he does hi look at Pete this one is from Luke hello Luke as a child I would often chew slash bite

all kinds of miscellaneous objects from your standard pen lid to destroying all the buttons on the sky remote with my teeth. Now, I've never bitten with a Sky Remote,

but those buttons were big. They were yielding. Oh, I'd love to get my incisor into one of them. If you were one of those people who explores the world via their mouth, that was dream stuff.

Luxurious. Yeah. Luxurious. However, I soon learned my lesson when I nearly died, aged 11. My grandma made a little homemade advent calendar,

and every Christmas she'd fill every pocket with little chocolates and a daily gift. One day the gift was a small padlock. Not sure why she did miss a fun gift for a child. Is your grandmother a cracker? Is she a Christmas cracker? Anyway, the lot was probably about the size of a bottle cap, and while chewing on it, it somehow ended up lodged in my throat. I quickly realised I was choking, probably to death,

and it took a few minutes. in my throat. I quickly realised I was choking, probably to death, and it took a few minutes. Probably to death. Probably to death. And it took a few minutes of my mum frantically hitting me on the back to dislodge it, and I eventually was able to spit it out. I mean, I presume her first thought was, no, no, no, no, locksmith.

Fair to say, I learned my lesson, but I'm still partial to the odd viral now and again. Thanks to Sean. Me and Luke are like kindred spirits, though I've never choked on a lock. I find that very hard. I find it very hard to believe that you didn't have some kind of choking episode as a kid.

No, no. Maybe I've got a very limited epiclosis, so to speak. Is that the name of it? Yeah, I think so. I famously in my... I'm not going to do myself any favours telling this story, but whatever. I famously in my I'm not going to do myself any favours telling this story but whatever I famously in my family

once choked on a big chunk of roast beef over Sunday lunch and because the nature of the family I have as you can probably tell from me we're all piss takers and there was about 15 seconds

of solid piss taking I was probably about 40 yeah before you started to turn bald and then my dad was like what are we doing what do you mean what we're doing and luckily of solid piss taking I was probably about 40 yeah before he started to turn bald and then my dad was like what what are you doing what are you doing what are you doing

and luckily it was weird though because no one heimlicht me right it just ended up just going down my throat okay

so it got stuck so it skipped out it eventually just went down just trickled down and it was so bad that I couldn't eat because my throat

felt really like it had been damaged or something so I couldn't eat for like I don't know 20 minutes I couldn't eat I couldn't eat because my throat felt really like it had been damaged or something so I couldn't eat for like I don't know 20 minutes I couldn't eat for a while

but it was funny because Sunday so Sunday lunch in my family growing up in their old house before we moved when I was about 16

we always used to do it so my dad used to work quite a lot my mum used to work shifts so we didn't always get to sit down but my parents and I'm really grateful

they did this every Sunday they said look we're going to have sunday lunch so even when i got a bit older and i played football on a sunday i'd always go for my sunday lunch and as i was a bit older my mates would go back to the be at the pub and i'd go back to the pub after anyway the reason it was fucking funny is because do you remember those chairs that families used to have that they were like almost like it's hard to explain but they had like little kind of straw woven things

holes in them do you understand what I mean yes and so it would be so these chairs we had you always see them knackered in the street yes exactly

because people have fallen through exactly so we had those and we had this cat called Jasper right and he knew that every Sunday there would be loads of food

on offer and he always knew that my sister who's five years younger than me was the softest target right so every sunday lunch he used to go under the chair which is obviously it's almost half see-through because it's just knitted straw woven together with holes all through it and he would just crawl the shit out the bottom of the chair right until my sister would start crying there'd be a load of commotion and he'd somehow get older some meat or something

it was incredible to the point of where he pulled all the chairs even if we were attacking him around and so we had to buy completely new chairs so

in my mind Sunday lunches at my parents and our family home were just chaos it was like me choking my cat

attacking my sister like repeatedly it was absolute chaos anyway did anyone call anyone a C word that was the famous Luke and Pete Shaw

story wasn't it greedy cunt no that wasn't my family that was one of our listeners family right what about this email from Liam O'Hare who says

hi guys I couldn't sleep last night because I had a dream that Luke left Stack to present the BBC news with Maisie Williams okay yeah alright fair I'd probably love that I wouldn't like Liam Stack I think the dynamic between can I work it around my initial job looped left stack to present the BBC News with Maisie Williams. Okay, yeah. All right, fair.

I'd probably love that. I wouldn't like leaving stack. I think the dynamic between... Can I work it around my initial job? I probably could. We'll have a discussion. Do it on shift. Yeah, I guess you kind of

have a similar dynamic because you'd be the tall... I can't remember the guy I gave a film as the tall Scottish bloke who was in those adverts in the 90s. Oh, um... The Scarface man. Oh, would you...

Angry Dave. Jerome Flynn? No, angry... He Scarface Man. Oh, would you... Angry Dave. Jerome Flynn? No, Angry Dave. He was like an angry toddler who hung out with Maisie Williams as the smart... Oh, um, the Hound.

The Hound, yeah. That's it, yeah. Yeah, he also plays one of the bad guys in Hot Fuzz. Yes. Yarp, that guy. Yeah.

So you reckon it'd work well? Yeah, I think the dynamic would work, to be honest. I'd love to work with Maisie Williams. No nonsense. I don't want to be a newsread'd love to work with Maisie Williams. No nonsense. I don't want to be a newsreader now.

That's not really my thing. Okay. I haven't got good enough diction, have I? Yeah, you have. You can speak all nice and nice. My T's are too splashy, as the girl from this time would say. What? The T's?

The most pissed off Alan Partridge gets in this time, that series, is when in an ad break, his co-presenter, Jenny, whatever she's's called says that his T's are too splashy. He really plays in his mind. So Liam it's great to know that I'm not only permeating your conscious I'm also permeating your subconscious.

Just take that as a compliment I suppose. But BBC News reading is not for me really. I don't think it's the best use of Maisie's talents either. True, true. She's wasted doing

BBC News reading. I mean you're in a situation where you are not, no one's asking you to do this. This is literally just a dream someone had. Yeah. I had a wild dream last night that I was under gunfire

and I had to hide in a bin. So, look, I'd be no good in Fallujah either. No. No. Unless I had a really good bin. Is it even bulletproof? I think I've done that in PUBG probably.

Didn't work there either. Anyway, let's squeeze one more email in shall we before we go. There's some good ones actually. Some really good ones. There's some good ones mate. Actually do you know what we're not going to do another email. I want to ask you about this Pete. Because this really came to me before I came into the studio this

morning. Is that have you seen that shop? That Amazon shop now my friend went there the other day he was telling me about it where you just walk in grab all

the stuff you want to get you scan your kind of Amazon ID and log in you pick up everything you want to pick up and you just walk out and it charges

for you automatically a lot of lads in my school used to do that but as soon as I heard about it I just want to test it I would like

I would like to get to the door and just turn around and go ha ha ha ha even though I'd paid for everything that was in there at what point

do you get charged as you walk out yeah I guess as soon as you get charged how does it even work it's all RFID tag isn't it in all of the products

you know like the things that when you... It's the same technology as your Oyster card or whatever. So every product will have one of them in, maybe, or something. And so as it leaves the store, maybe there's a proximity thing with your mobile phone or your account that tells, well, that person's carrying out that particular piece of property.

I don't know, man. I've never designed it. So they just stick them on. It's like a sticker version. Yeah, I think so, yeah. Otherwise it'd be very expensive, right? Yeah. What about if you're buying an individual apple? You ain't going to put a sticker on that.

I don't know. I don't really know, to be honest, Lukey. I'd love to know. If people know, they should tell us. They should get in touch. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com. That's all we've got time for on this Monday episode. Hope you've had a lovely Monday, 5th of July.

We'll be back on Thursday, the 8th of July because that's how dates work with more of this and we'll see you then. Pete, have you got any parting shot, any parting comment for our listeners? Really do we.

Let them go for a wee. We'll see you on Thursday. The Luke and Pete Show the luke and pete show is a stack production and part of the acast creator network