The Luke and Pete Show - Brydon? I Hardly Know Him

Episode Date: June 9, 2025

Today, Luke and Pete dive into the chemical mystery of WD-40 – is it basically just liquid cocaine? Then they move on to debating the fastest way to destroy your phone if the police stop you with something dodgy on it…just a hypothetical!Elsewhere, Luke’s nearly in hives over Pete’s snack-based mic etiquette, Donny has no idea how Rob Brydon ended up in his contacts, and a listener falls asleep on the toilet during a Ramble Live show.Email us at [e-mail] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.Fill out our survey here to have a chance at winning a PS5!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

All right, before we get into today's episode, Stack is currently running a survey for all of its listeners and we'd love you to help out by answering a few questions. If you submit a few answers about your Stack listening habits, whether you just listen to us or a host of shows across our network, you'll be entered into a competition with a chance to win a brand new PlayStation 5 at the end of every month for the next five months. Plenty of opportunities. You'll only enter once though and your name will stay in the prize draw for all five PS5

across that five month period. These surveys are a great way of us finding out more about you and helping us to continue to bring more of what you love. So they massively help us. So do get involved. There is a link in the episode description to fill out the survey. Get involved, get entered in that prize draw now. Thank you very much and here is the start of the Luke and Pete show. I imagine it's probably got quite a chaotic start.

It's the Luke and Pete show. I hope that the Riverside recording was recording when I started then. Who knows because that's technology for you. Well a little a little um sort of peek behind the curtain of the Lucan Pete Show today Is that Pete Donaldson aka PD aka Donny aka Diggory Donaldson aka Funkadelic Frankie aka the crazy world of Arthur Brown aka Jamie Redknapp was Being very obnoxious to me. I was not being very obnoxious. In a way that I think, I think if you did a survey of Luke and Pete Show listeners and said one of them was being obnoxious to the other, which one was it? Everyone would guess me and that's fair enough.

It would be a landslide. It would be a murder. On this occasion, it would be. On this occasion, you were being very, very unkind to me. Detail, details please. That's what we need. I'll eat this curry I've just reheated. Oh, what is it? What do you go for? It's a mixture of the hot stuff that I like, the non-hot stuff that Sarah likes. There's some poppadoms in there. There's rice. It is a real mishmash. Sounds like a bin. It sounds like an actual bin.

You have real problems with me eating night food during the day and I'm not having it. I have problems with you. So the thing that brings me out in Hives, now this is actually quite interesting because the thing that brings you out in Hives is me slagging off other people in our industry. So that's nice. We're both going to be in Hives because I'm about to do that but I'm also going to say the thing that brings me out in Hives is people doing things on shows they shouldn't be doing and one of them is eating and I think if you look for a really terrible example of that, things you shouldn't be doing on air. The worst example of it to my mind

and I'm going to get in trouble for saying this because one of my good friends of mine is the producer of it, but he knows me to be an honest man so I have to say what I think. He's the news agents. The news agents, right, okay. What, they're always eating? It's no, it's sunglasses on air. What? Very louche, louche broadcasting? Yeah, it's very, very important to have sunglasses on the show, isn't it? Who's got sunglasses on? At one point they all did. They went for a phrase.

The news agents did not all have sunglasses on during a record. That's insanity. Do you want me to show you a pic? Yes, I would like you to show me a pic. That's insanity. Do you want me to show you a pic? Yes, I would like you to show me a pic. That's insane. It was when they're in the US covering the US election, they all went a bit to their heads. Were they outside? They might have been outside. They won't need to see their notes. Come on. Or their screens. It's hard to see screens when you've got sunnies on.

So the next time someone's doing an OB at the World Cup at Wimbledon or something, you're happy for the presenter to wear sunglasses are you? If they're an ex-pro I think it's fine and I would sort of say... No, no, no, come on, answer the question you've been asked. If you sat in a Corvette that's too much but if you're wearing sunglasses I think that's an absolute... I think the horse can't wear sunglasses but I think the guests... Hello everyone and welcome to the production meeting for today's broadcast.

I believe the presenter Peter has had an idea. I have everyone I'd like to present today's broadcast from my Corvette. Yes, and I would like to swing Shane nunchucks around while I'm doing it as well. And I won't be turning the radio down I'll be listening to Don Henley's Boys of Summer and some Yacht Rock and yes, that is my pet orangutan in the back seat What you gonna do about it? I call him Clyde. This guy's having a very colourful breakdown. There was like an influencer on... Anyway, don't eat on the show is what I'm saying. Carry on. I'm not eating on the show, I'm just pointing out that I've got curry tantalisingly close to my mouth but I can't eat any.

It's going to give you a wet mouth. Because of this anti-Indian... I've got food woke. I've got broadcasting woke. No, you've gone the other way. You've gone very right. You won't let a man eat some Indian food. Outrageous. It's not the fact that it's Indian food. If it's fish and chips. Good old beautiful British fish and chips. I'll be saying the same thing. What were you going to say?

Where were we? I can't bloody remember. I can never bloody remember to be honest. You're lucky I've even got the running order up. It's not even running order. It's in the CV mills. You say that but I don't feel lucky. I never feel lucky when you tell me I should be lucky. So anyway, we're about to start the show and Luke's fretting about the screens and there's two screens in the box room. There are two monitors slash televisions, one from the good people of Toshiba, one from the less good people at Cello, one of the last UK... No, it's actually LG in Cello.

LG in Cello, right. The big Toshiba's outside, right. Apologies. Because you know what, our friend Dave at Toshiba always sort of does that with TV. I know. He should get his props, but this TV inside the studio is an LG. Can he get us a telly, because my telly in my front room is absolutely... I don't know what's happened to it in the last three months, but it's just decided to be very slow and very obstructive when I'm trying to... It sort of coincided with my daughter getting quite interested in the telly and things need to happen fast in the toddler's world.

I had to put a load of cardboard held down on the cellar table all over the length of my Sonos because my son uses it as a fucking drum kit. And he's done stuff to it that I didn't even think was possible. I'm seeing screens on the Sonos app. Oh, right. I've never seen before. They're in fucking hieroglyphics. Has he made the Silk Road app on it? He's hacked into the mainframe.

My son's like transported our Sonos bar onto the dark web and all of a sudden I've got like wraps of heroin turning, that Moroccan black turning off at the house. He's been barred on Silk Road, look, can he? Oh yeah, he probably has. He probably has, hasn't he? But anyway. What were you going to say, Keris?

Well, Toshiba Dave, so he's on a lot of our phones as Toshiba Dave, he's a legend. Not in my phone, I want to text him, get us a telly, Toshiba Dave, for crying out loud. He sometimes does just pop up saying, I heard you on the show, do you want a telly? Have we said Toshiba enough? I think he just does it for the love of it. It's a good point actually, it's a good point. We used, we, that, our entire sort of business proposition used to be underpinned with people like Toshiba Dave. It used to be just people who, I think the bloke who used to work for like Square Enix, I think gave us a bit of money to keep us going. The good people of Paco Rabanne got in touch and kept us going and stuff. This is like 15 years ago. This is massively pre-date stack.

But yeah, massively and it used to be like, it's basically Angel Investors who'd chuck us a couple of grand to talk about their product for a little while and it would keep us going for such a long time. Those guys were great and continue to be great. By the time it got to you it was a couple of grand. After Lukie got his piece. Anyway there's two tellies in the room that Luke's in. Luke asked me... That's a rider request by me by the way. Every room I'm in has to have two TVs. The brown M&Ms of his rider and he said kind of move this screen and I said which screen? Because one of them happens to be nailed to the wall. He's saying that he can't move that screen.

Yeah and I think people's impression of you is a wacky, not wacky because I don't like the word wacky. Right, I mean mccurry. Is an eccentric haphazard but ultimately lovable guy who means well. That's what people think of you. People think of me as a... Cold Pratt. Cold Pratt.

Cold Pratt. Cold Pratt. Cold Pratt. A cold brew Pratt. Occasionally the tables doff turn. The tables doff turn. And me as the victim of the abuse. I think one, I think it's, I'm a victim of my own success there because I've made one very non-movable

television look quite movable and the other immovable television look immovable and that is the sleight of hand of the studio director one would suggest. I'd definitely get it on the CV of OU mate. Yeah, can make a television look movable when it isn't and can make a television immovable it also isn't. If it moves when it shouldn't, gaffer tape. If it doesn't move when it should, WD-40. Apparently WD-40 is quite good for getting rust off of chrome. Alright. I came home the other day and the Wi the WiFi I had access to was WD-40ing a hinge on our fridge. Nice.

Oh, okay, nice. Yeah, and it used to squeak and now it doesn't. It's such good stuff. I mean, it was the 40th go, wasn't it? It did 39 iterations of it and then he got it at... I mean, imagine what it was... I want to see the first one. I want to see the original cocaine, Coca-Cola stuff. I want to see the first one. I want to see the, you know, the original cocaine, Coca Cola stuff.

Like I want to see what is really hot. You used to have cocaine in it. You used to have, yeah, WD-40. Yeah, I've been, I spent. WD-40 used to just be a liquid cocaine. Yeah, had nothing, nothing else going for it. What happened was you'd squirt up your nose or down your throat and after a while you couldn't remember what you're doing.

You didn't give a fuck. Free straw. It's got a straw on the side, so that works. She't remember what you're doing. You didn't give a fuck. Free straw. It's got a straw on the side so that works. She was probably buying cocaine. It's only £3.41 for a can. I'm really sorry to report Luke. Due to the fact that I'm currently building or trying to build out a scrap wood, a little

player house, a little Wendy house for Lytton. Just put splinters in my mind. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Why are you basically giving your child splinters? Tennis. She put splinters in my mind. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Why are you basically giving your child splinters? Tennis, she's a bit of a tennis. Tennis if she's unlucky. A lot of exposure now as has to be said. No, and my little toilet that has loads of scrap wood. The scrap wood, there's none left. I've used it in the project. Well it's become a bit of a trope hasn't it, the old scrap wood in the toilet. But before we move on, just say if people are tuning in for the first

time, I'll give them a quick rundown of what we talked about in recent episodes. Just so they get a bit of a flavour of what to expect. I've had laryngitis. We talked a lot about Keanu Reeves. We got an update of an email from a listener who calls himself the bad boy of Patonk. Pete was terrorised by badgers. I got pissed off with you for not really knowing who Neil Young is. I know who he is, I just don't think he's up there. Fine, fine. We've just kind of developed a quite one-sided beef with another podcast also called Luke

and Pete. Oh yeah. I've told people how to get some good sleep because there's an epidemic of insomnia in the country. We had a big old pop at Stephen Bartlett and then we talked about the OJ Simpson car chase. That's basically it. Got in there, didn't they? In the last couple of episodes. Where else are you getting that? Not the newsagent, I tell you what. Too busy with the sunglasses. They can't read their notes. Too busy doing reads. Live reads for Ray Bank. Too busy doing live reads for not Toshiba. They're not Toshiba people, we're Toshiba people. The producer of that

show Tom is a good friend of mine, as I said, he won't be listening to this, but if he is Tom there's no beef, it's just a bit of what we like to call a broadcaster banter. Yeah, yeah. Although I do have a genuine dislike for Lewis Goodall. Yeah, I don't know who anybody is to be honest. Keep it that way Pete. Yeah okay. Because you haven't got to get in trouble then have you? I get the news I get the news agents mixed up with the rest is television, the rest is what's the thing? Entertainment. Entertainment with the tall man. Richard. With the tall man Richard. I once I met Richard Osmond once and I'm gonna tell you the story and he's very nice, taller than me, which is obviously a thrill for me.

It doesn't happen that often. It was in the talk sport offices, the old ones. He's a Fulham fan, Richard Osmond. And I was doing something in there, he was doing something in there. We sat on a desk next to each other kind of thing. This was before he was massively famous. I mean, he wasn't as famous then as he is now. And I said to him, oh, we've got this show called Ramble Meats, right?

You should do it because our co-host Marcus, he's a Fulham fan, and you guys would vibe it, be really good. And we speak to people who are interested in football from different walks of life and stuff. And he was like, oh, that sounds really good. I'll be really interested in that. Yeah, thanks. And he gave me his number. In fact, I might still have his number on my phone, Peter. Just to give it to Lisa. Let me just check if I have. Yes, I have. It's right there. Yeah, I've got his number on my phone, Peter. Oh, right. Just to give a little bit of someone. Let me just check if I have. Yes, I have.

It's right there. All right. Yeah, I've got his number on my phone, right? And I text him about it as he asked me to. As he asked me to. Ask me if he replied. Yeah. I think needless to say, you're not going to have the last laugh on this one, unfortunately.

No. He didn't reply. So that was the ramble meets that could have been. Do you know who I found on my phone recently? I don't know if I said this. Remember when you had Manny Pacquiao? I found a celebrity... let's have a guessing game. This is a bit of fun, isn't it? Right, guessing game. I found someone on my phone that I did not realise I had and it was quite fun to see his picture...

His. Ah, shit. his picture on the WhatsApp. I'm not that mind hunter. You've already given me so many clues. And it would have been when I was producing someone rather than someone I spoke to myself. Fred West? Not Fred West, no. Very good builder, by all accounts. Animal mineral, you know, vegetables, just juice. OK, so I've got an amount of questions to ask.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. OK, and if I get it right, you've got to text them. No, I'm not going to do that. But yeah. I'll give you his number and you can do it. All right, that's all right, mate. It's Pete. Yeah.

OK. Yeah, all right, yeah. I'll give you the phone number of this person. OK? Are they over 50? Yes. OK. David Attenborough?

No. David Attenborough? No. David Attenborough? No. David Attenborough? No. Um, okay. Yeah, alright, yeah. I'll give you the phone number of this person. Okay? Are they over 50? Yes. Okay. David Attenborough? No. That'd be good, wouldn't it?

That would be good. He ain't got a mobile. There's no way he's got a mobile. Is there? Do you reckon he's got a mobile? I don't reckon he has. Yeah, but it's like shaped like a big penguin. Quacks.

Quacks. Do penguins quack? If a penguin's quacking, it quacks. I'm trying to think of like animal-based phones, but I really can't. I can remember the Lips one. So it's not David Attenborough. Got like male, well you just got male, yeah. So I know there's a male over the age of 50.

Male over the age of 50, yeah. And you've produced, I reckon it's probably, I reckon I can get it. Right. And how long ago did you produce them? Was it like a long time ago? I don't think I produced them. I probably administered an interview with that person for a horse, I think. Rick and your face?

No. Was that close? Yeah, it's definitely... Stephen Merchant? No. Carl Pilkington? No. Not XFM staff. Okay.

Never XFM staff. I've got Carl's number anyway. Fucking know you saw a Carl all the time, didn't we back in the day? Can you give me another clue what how do they what how do they dress how do they look no don't I won't obscure clues Right interested. I would say I would say he wears a formal Crisp blue shirt and chinos probably Michael Portillo no Good guess. It's a good guess. It's a good guess.

Alright, um... I'm enjoying this. Are they known for being particularly flamboyant? No. Okay. You have five more questions. Over the age of 50, you said? Yes.

Jim Campbell? Five more questions. Fuck's sake Pete. Come on. What's their trade? Are they known as being a broadcaster? Yes. This better be worth it. Broadcaster and comedian I would say.

People are on tenterhooks. They are. I'm not going to get it am I? I hate comedians. You are going to get it. Michael McIntyre? No. Stop asking. You've got to get closer and closer. You can't just name all the comedians.

That's not a level if not higher. Okay. And you said chinos in the blue shirt. This is such a bum steer. I promise you when you tell me who it is, they're never going to warn this. I'm going to type his name into Google. Do I think they're funny? Yes. Oh okay. Stuart Lee. No. Would he... when have you ever seen him in a crisp blue shirt and chinos? Jesus Christ man. The problem is I don't trust the Quizmaster. I have a very very deep mistrust of the Quizmaster at this point. I should have listened for the amount of keystrokes you did on the Google. I could have got a lot of letters in that name.

It's like a fucking Jackson and Sarapedia recording. How famous are they out of ten? UK, they're a full ten for me. Internationally, five. Most UK celebrities aren't anything, are they? Yeah, okay. So one of the most famous people in the UK, is what you're saying? Yeah. Blimey, okay. How many guesses have I got left? Five. I can't name it. I feel like I'm getting Jackson's Wikipedia flashback.

We're not doing yes and no questions. I can direct you, so just ask general questions. Okay, what's their first name? Come on. Okay, what's their first name? Come on. Okay, what colour hair they got? Sort of brown though, got suspiciously thicker in recent years. Are they fat? No.

Pete, this is fucking impossible, Larry David. No, and he's a UK, Larry David is a UK celebrity. You're bad at it. He's famous in the UK. The great leveller for you is anything like Jackson Psychopedia. You're usually very good thoughtful brain just goes to absolute march. Just tell me who it is. It's Rob Brydon. Oh that's good. That's pretty good. Now could you not see him in a crisp blue shirt with chinos? I could. Yeah that's fair enough That's pretty good. Could you not see him in a crisp blue shirt with chinos? I could.

Yeah, that's fair enough. You didn't give me a bum steer there. I didn't give you a bum steer, thank you. And what was your experience of Rob not actually meeting him? I honestly can't remember ever meeting him. I have no idea how his number got in my phone. But it is. You reckon he's a ten on the celebrity scale?

I reckon he is, isn't he? Ten's fucking the highest you can get. I would give him an 8.5 probably. 8.5, alright that's fair. He's up there though. If you walk down the road with ten people and Rob Bryden walk past, are all ten of them

going to know who he is? They're not going to know who he is, but they'll know that he's been on the telly I think. They'd go, ah it's that guy. I should have gone, the only other one I was gonna guess was gonna be Coogan. I thought Coogan could be right in there. But then you put me off with the suspiciously thicker hair. Has he got a hair job? I think he got, yeah.

He's been to Turkey? I think it was pre-Turkey, probably paid full price. That must be annoying if you spent all that money in Harley Street and then, you know, five years later it is cheap as chips. Well look at Rooney, that's what he's done. It's not even fucking taken, has it? Good point. Why is it so cheap in Turkey now?

They've just invested a lot into it. I don't know, this ended, there's a lot of, when we were in, where were we? It wasn't Albania, it was... You were in Kosovo, weren't you? Kosovo, that was the thing that surprised me. There's a lot of people getting nose jobs and hair jobs and stuff. Do they call it a hair job? Sounds bad, doesn't it? I just said hair job, it's the first time I've ever said it.

The man gave me a hair job. It sounds rude, doesn't it? It does, it does, yeah. It sounds really rude. Have you ever met Coogan? Yeah, I've interviewed him a few times. You know that. Nice fella. Spells, he's obsessed about that interview. I don't know why. It's Men of a Certain Edge. That's the only thing they ever, if they know that I've interviewed him, they know. I was at a, I was at, I was having some drinks with the neighbours and none of them had ever heard

When Michael Barrymore Kissed Me on the Lips. And they were absolutely, and offered you a handy. And offered me a handy and they were absolutely astounded. It's a great story. Yeah, well you forget how. You were very reticent to talk about it on the record for a long old time. Yeah, I thought. It's weird though, one of the neighbours daughters, who's like 14, 15, all the kids love his adorable TikToks. Like he's had a bit of a second wind on TikTok. Don't pull on the thread too much. Being adorable. An adorable older man.

We have to say what we always say, Barrymore comes up quite a lot on this show. He does, yeah. He looks large. Well, he's gigantic cos he does. Great presenter. We always like to hear that. Don't you think he was a great presenter? It's been a trope for a long time how much we... Yeah, but you might have changed. You might have changed your mind.

Thinking about what he did to me. An unforced kiss, unbelievable. You were like, good presenter, good presenter, kiss you on the lips, great presenter. He presented himself very well. What's been going on other than this?

We basically started arguing today and then we went straight into what's on my phone. Let's have a break. A question that leaves me cold when anyone asks that. A member of the, member of the, member of the suits of his majesty. Yeah, exactly. Tommy Robinson got busted for that, didn't he? Do you know that?

No. One of the things that isn't mentioned that often is that Tommy Robinson just came out of jail, didn't he? With his beard, his stupid beard. He had a beard and hair like he was fucking Tom Hanks in Castaway. Probably some fucking D category prisoner, I think. Oh yeah, you have a tough old time, when you're walking to the vending machine and back. Anyway, he, so he went to prison, I'm freestyling here,

but I'm fairly certain he went to prison for violating a court order. Yes, yeah. That's definitely not the first. I'm a priest on here, but I'm fairly certain he went to prison for violating a court order. Yes, yeah. It's definitely not the first time. One of the things he got busted for is I think he got routine stopped at some event and he refused to give the PIN number to his phone to the police officer, who I think had some kind of probable cause and so needed to see it and he wouldn't give it to him. That meant he violated the terms of his parole or something?

I thought that the term pin numbers aren't something you have to hand over. That's what it said. In the UK. Huh. Well you don't think you have to? I thought that was the whole, maybe I've just sort of watched too much American Focus stuff, but I thought that was the whole kind of charm of Apple not handing over pin numbers and stuff you don't necessarily

have to I thought that was the case anyway remember like the amount of times they've had to sort of wait until someone opens their phone and then nab them and keep the phone awake so to speak which is which must be a real pain in the bum. So according to the regulation of Investigatory Powers Act 2000 section 49 says there are circumstances where the police do have legally have the power to inspect your phone and have to give you notice they require you to provide the PIN to allow them access. I reckon if you're in big trouble, like not letting them have the PIN is probably going

to be less bother than, you're going to be in less trouble for doing that. But what if you are? If you've got something on your phone that's going to be less bother than, you're going to be in less trouble for doing that. But what if you are- If you've got something on your phone that's going to purge you. But if you're some sort of, so say let's just like, it's not a massive flight of fancy to imagine you being some kind of like drug kingpin of Leon C, right? And the coppers are trying to feel your collar,

but they can't get, they've got nothing on you. They've got nothing on me. Can't get anything in the stick, right? You've got nothing on me, copper. But you know your phone is going to incriminate you. Yeah. And then they use the Regulatory Investigative Powers Act or whatever it's called, and say they need your pin. And you've got about 10 seconds to react. Would you drop your phone on the floor and like stamp on it? I don't think you would have to bend it wouldn't you? Throw it in the North Sea? Throw it in the North Sea? Would that do the trick?

If it's happened on the promenade by Leon C and you... Could you throw it in the sea and that would take care of it? Well, if they could recover it, I mean most phones are waterproof these days. How long does it need to be the bottom of the sea for though? Because Rebecca Vardy got away with that one. She did, yeah. I think you'd have to... You'd have to drill it, because even if you snapped it, the memory chips might be at the top or the bottom of the phone. Mind you, it'd all be encrypted as well, wouldn't it?

There must be a certain amount of time the? So all the data will be encrypted. There must be a certain amount of time the salt water, the briny sea fucks it. It's all up for grabs innit? It all depends. I mean usually most of my phones are smashed anyway so it'll get in by hook or by crook that water I'm sure. Oh yeah, that's the thing, if the police tried to seize your phone, good luck with that because in about two weeks time he's going to be on to a new one. I'll have a new one yeah. Change So it doesn't matter. Change him. Burn him.

Do you back it up so you've got all the information across every phone? No, I've got, I think I've got Google Photos. I mean what else do you need other than photos these days? Everything's online now. Everything's a Gmail or a Google Drive in it. 100%. Yeah, yeah. Hundies.

Yeah. Absolutely. Let's have a break Peter. When we come back we'll, I don't know what we'll do, we'll work it out. We'll work it out. We're back with the Luke and Pete show and we're working it out people, I hope you enjoyed those adverts. Yeah, shall we go through some emails Luke? We've not been through a few for a few days. Yeah, we've got an email here from Sam. Oh God, Sam!

Which didn't quite make it into the ramble. Right. But it's quite good Luke and Pete show stuff. Lovely. So basically, Sam, hello to you Sam. He says to follow him. So we just be on tour. So people who listen, there are, I mean, I'm not sure you believe this Pete, but I promise you there is a lot of people listening to Luke and Pete show don't listen to the ramble. Right. Mostly our female listeners. And for the most part, I'm not saying women can't like football, but I'm just saying a lot of them do listen to Luke and Pete and don't listen to the ramble. Right. Um, most, mostly our female listeners, um, for them, for the most part, I'm not saying women can't like football, but I'm just saying a lot of them do listen

to the, they'll compete and don't listen to the Ramble. Right. Um, so they may not know that we've just been on tour with the Ramble. We did five or six dates around the UK and we got back a couple of weeks ago. And this, that's the context in which Sam emails us. He says, Hey guys, came to see you in Manchester a couple of weeks ago. Me and my mate George managed to get front row seats and sat down about 15 minutes before you came out. I remember you walking out and a few minutes of the first half. At halftime, I went to grab another beer and use the toilet. The next thing I remember is my mate George banging on the toilet door, telling me to wake up as we're going to miss our train.

I fell asleep in the toilet cubicle and missed the entire second half of the show that I'd waited five years for. I'm absolutely gutted. At 5am wake up and numerous beers absolutely did me over. I've attached a photo below from Marcus Spellar's Instagram account of my empty seat and my friend George. Please do another live show soon. Oh that's absolutely cracking. He was at the front as well. Absolute primo real estate and he vacated it for the comfort of a toilet. I tell you there's a lot of people in that photo and I remember being at the show and it's hard to see when you're up on stage. It's absolutely ram-packed in there. That's one in the eye for the haters. I mean a couple of questions really. I, did you have your pants on your ankles? I've hoped so.

Because like if you snooze for like half an hour on the on the seat, like I remember I used to read quite a lot when I was a child and I used to sit on the toilet for ages just reading. I don't know why. I don't know why at my nan's house I would just always be sitting on the thing and I remember like your legs would go to sleep eventually if you were there for like more than 20 minutes. I'd say you get piles as well I think. Is it right? Well because it all just sort of falls out of the suction. That might be an old wives tale I think, maybe.

Right, no, no. I think it's, I think it is kind of, isn't it like sitting on cold, hard surfaces and poor diet and spending too much time on the toilet? Because I remember seeing a guy on an Instagram video who was, I think he was like a bowel specialist or something and he said, if you go to the toilet and you feel like you have to force it, stop and go again later. You're gonna blow a gasket. Because you could do yourself some damage. Yeah.

So I don't think there's anything to suggest that Sam was heading off for a number two. No. Maybe he was. I don't know. Maybe he was. Who knows? Maybe he's got an irritable bowel. Hope not. But the upshot is that he's left an empty chair right at the front

and it's not the only empty chair in the whole thing. He's missed Vish. He's missed Andy, he's missed Brassel de Mind. Brass de Mind. He also missed Richard Keyes coming out at the end for the encore. We had an encore with Richard Keyes and people don't fucking believe it but if you weren't there you won't have seen it and you're never gonna see it again because the time tunnel's closed forever now. And he was clearly going through some stuff.

I don't wanna belittle a man, make his life more difficult, but he was going through some stuff and he put himself out there at the end of the show. He really did. I think Richard has always been going through stuff. Always going through stuff. Sometimes with his own making.

Sam, I'm so sorry. We'll have to copy and paste that email into the round the WhatsApp. Yeah, we should do definitely. I'll tell you what Sam, why don't you come and see us in the studio here. Why don't you come and see us in the studio? We'll sit on the toilet we have if you want. We've got a big, I've got my own toilet basically it's the accessible toilet in the next to the normal toilet. That's not your own toilet, that's annoying because you're always in the fucking annoying. King Donaldson's toilet. Accessible toilet. Some disabilities are invisible. Mine is particularly invisible.

I think you're very brave going on this show on the record. You're using the accessible toilet when you don't need to. I need room for my dancing. My successful poo dancing. I need room for my dancing, my successful poo dancing. Another one down, yeah! Another depth charge. Have you seen the... For fuck's sake. Have you seen the Kirby enthusiasm episode where Larry gets caught using the accessible toilet and he sees a disabled guy later using the non accessible toilet?

So he pulls him up on it. Yes, yes I do. That's what you're doing. Have you watched any Kirby enthusiasm? I've gone up to and including the season where he gets the fatwhile on him. Right well he's, it really is. Was that number 8 maybe? I mean it really has got to the point where it's like, I mean Haynes, we sat down for our trip from Haynes manual to go to Las Vegas for Russia Mania and we were both, I didn't see what Mark was reading, watching and Mark didn't see what I was watching and we just so happened to absolutely bash through about four episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm over the flight.

It's always on the plane for some reason. Always on the plane. Always on the plane. And it really has turned into like, right about what you know, like just, it's all based around like golf clubs and stuff. Like it really is like proper, there's just no writing in it anymore. And there never was, but but good god it just seems to be a lot of fucking improv.

So most people talk about Curb has been untouchable right? Yeah, I think it's always been slightly touchable. But do you rate it? Yeah it's great, it's great but you've really got to be in the mood for the farting about. It's just a lot of, like scenes gone for a bit too long and it's like oh isn't it great that. Well you do get that phenomenon in Curb Which I don't personally mind but people have talked about before where they establish what's happening between themselves at the start of the scene Yeah, don't they? Yeah, so then what happens a lot is like, I don't know Larry will come in and say I've

Accidentally fucking run over a cat or whatever. And then Jeff will be like what? You accidentally run over a cat and then Cheryl will come in and go I can? You accidentally run over a cat? And then Cheryl will come in and go, I can't believe you ran over a cat. And it's like, they hid it home before the scene actually moves on, which I guess is a symptom of how they write it. Because they don't properly write it, do they? No, no. Well, I would be astounded if they did. But yeah, it's definitely descended into very, just pretty basic stuff. I know one of the judges got absolutely panned, but I haven't seen that one. Maybe that is into very basic stuff.

I know one of the judges got absolutely panned but I haven't seen that one. Maybe that is the fat one, I can't remember. I love LD so you're never going to get me criticising him really. I completely agree. He could have gone down that road that Gervais has gone down, couldn't he? And he hasn't really. He's just got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, hasn't he? Who, Gervais?

Yeah, he had to lie down and get a picture taken as it looked really Brent. It's very funny. But you know what I mean? I quite like it when people become super successful, super wealthy and they don't turn into a dickhead. It seems refreshing to me. And unless it's something about LD I don't know, there could be. He seems all right. Whereas Gervais has gone mad. Yeah. Well, I think he's always been inside the cordon, any old Larry David. He's always been writing for other people. He's always been involved in like SNL sort of stuff. So

he's kind of always been part of that kind of pack. So anything he does, it's always going to be sort of guided by them, I suppose, a little bit. So anyway. I think he might be worth almost a billion dollars. Lardy. He gets that sweet... Check this out, right? Let's read this now. Guess how much syndication deals of Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm have netted as of 2013. This is over 12 years ago.

Or 12 years ago, or 12 years ago sorry, by the time 2013 ran around how much money from syndication deals had Seinfeld and Kirby Enthusiasm netted? I can see Kirby getting more life outside of America but Seinfeld was very New York wasn't it? Guess. Errrr... One and a half billion. Three point one billion dollars.

Fuck me. That is... He personally... So just from syndication alone, Larry David has personally earned two hundred and fifty million dollars from Seinfeld. It's generational wealth. It really is generational wealth. You've got to hope that you've got enough about you to tie down these, you know, these

kind of creds, haven't you? You've got to make sure that you're at the start of your journey, if you're doing something that you feel is going to be an absolute banner. Get your IP in. Get your IP in. Get it in order. Oh God. He said apparently the only comment that Larry Doe has ever made about his wealth, when he

was asked about it after a 2007 divorce, he just, the only thing he responded with is, I have a lot of money. Ha ha ha! Which is nice. Lovely. All right, let's get out of here. We've been Pete, we've been Luke, we've been all of those things,

and we'll be back on Thursday for your batteries! Hello at LukePeachShow.com. If you would like to get in touch and let us know what is in your remote controls, we'll see you on Thursday. The Luke and Pete show is a stack production and part of the A-Cast Creator Network.