The Luke and Pete Show - Dog suicide bridge

Episode Date: September 30, 2024

The lads relive their wild night at the London Palladium for Football Ramble LIVE - ever been so drunk you queued for your own toilet at home? That’s exactly how it ended for some!Then Pete shares some holiday, um, highlights? A pigeon spring roll that left him with what feels like shrapnel in his mouth and the knowledge of a disturbing mystery about a bridge where dogs are strangely drawn to leap to their deaths.Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram.***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the Luke and Pete show. My name is Pete Donaldson. It's Monday the 30th of September and I'm joined by Mr. Lukey Mill wearing what could only be described as a lovely back to the future jacket, I think, like a kind of Marty McFly kind of number. It's kind of a padded red fleece, I suppose. All ladies hide it down. Yeah, yeah, from LLB and I got it for my birthday from, from LC, from my mother and father-in-law. I like it. Yeah.

I like it a lot. And people will be noticing Peter on today's episode of The Luke and Pete Show. You sound slightly different because you are, my friend, recording, as the pros say, out in the field. Out in the field? Out, literally out in the field. Not in a field. Not in a field. No, Field no, no, I am in a field actually I just I just happen to be in a house that's in a field

So I guess all houses are in a field eventually. I mean they all we all came from fields, didn't we? Yeah, I suppose you were well, I was your age. It all used to be fields around here Yeah, when you sort of shoot when you buy a plot of land to build a building on, it must be absolutely, you sort of have some needs that you, you know, you probably want a south facing garden, you probably want, you know, room to do this and room to do that and stuff. But it must be quite sort of like scary to sort of go,

I'm gonna put my house at this exact location rather than a feet or two to the left or the right. You must be like, I don't know whether this is going to be an issue in the future, but it's so final that you can't really move your house after you've done it, can you? No, I don't think you would really have achieved full Pete Donaldson-ness if you don't at some point build your own house. I think it's all been building up towards that. I think it would be very much like the last fallout that came out where you could build your own den out of old pallets and doors and stuff. I think it would be that kind of

allotment chic I think. That's got to be the next thing, because I mean, God knows there are enough houses being built. So at some point we have to sort of go into full on shantytown vibes. In my mind, when I'm imagining you getting reaching your full potential and finally building your own home in my in the scenario, your partner has definitely left you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I've got and my main source of warmth is an oil drum. And I'm eating, carrying, and I'm eating.

And there's gloves with no fingers on them. There's gloves with no fingers on them, and I've got like a little big, a big sort of indie hat. But I mean, I guess like, you know, post-cataclysm, but we're obviously all heartling towards its speed. Career towards a record speed. That's probably how we're all going to end up I would say to be honest. So tell people where you are Pete, to give people a little insight because you know you're out in the field

doesn't happen very often, you're normally in the apology cabin or we're normally in the studio together. Where in the world are you Carmen Santiago? I am in Northumberland, I'm in Anick of all places. It's not a place that I've ever been. How was the drive up? Relative, well I had my mam in the car which was nice. Exactly, that's what I'm asking. She kept the arguments to a minimum which is good. So that's, everyone was very polite. But did you?

Minding their P's and Q's. Did I? What do you mean? Like, did I argue? What, by myself, in my head? I've seen you do it. I've seen me do it. That's what I do half the way through most of these shows. No, I'm in a place called Bamba. I dropped me mam off at her house, which is very good. I saw me dad briefly. And then, yeah, we were off out and up the coast, really.

It's not really a place I've ever been before. Lindisfarne and Warranford and Seahouses and Docksford. I'm looking at the map. Doddington. Mason- Is this the place where the Vikings were for a while? Chris- Yeah. It's probably why they had so many bloody castles. Anik and Bamber Castle and stuff. It's pretty much the landing area of all the Vikings really. So there's a lot of Viking coins kicking around. There's a lot of twitches, a lot of bird twitches kicking around. There seems to be some beautiful birds floating around, but I wouldn't know them from Adam, to be honest. I could be looking at some really special birds, but I wouldn't know.

Mason- Is that what you do? Do you walk up to the bird watching and saying, there's some very special birds over there. What are we looking at? What are we looking at? One of them's wearing a little coat. Did you make him a little coat? Yes I did. Yes I did make the bird a little coat. It's got Blink 182 on the back. I've written less than Jake on the back of that Robin with a Bible special. Apparently the Bamber Castle where you are is the mythical castle home or based on where Sir Lancelot lived. Yeah and and I think, is Anick Castle

where they filmed Harry Potter as well? That's a shame. Oh really? I think it's where they filmed Harry Potter as well because it looks, I mean everything around here looks very Harry Potter-y, but I mean, I've never, you know, I keep repeating the same adage that I didn't have a car when I was a kid,

so like, actually exploring these places is actually quite, oh, I understand why people go on about it so much. So what's on the agenda? What's on the plan? You can go to Anick Castle, go to Bamber Castle. At the beach yesterday, I mean, the weather is atrocious. So we'll probably go to, the thing about, I think the thing that separates these castles from other castles around the country is that the ones around the country is that? The ones that around the country they don't have windows in they've put windows in these ones

So it's actually quite pleasant to be inside when it's when it's raining So it's probably why they put them in because the weather so bad I tell you what those many those medieval talk should have thought of that shouldn't they they should have they should have thought about inventing glass and Yeah, poppin popping the up some windows in for crying out loud. It'd blow a gale. Yeah, it'd probably be a lot less drafty. I imagine it'd be what a job that would be to get some glass put into some castles. That'd be a job for a specialist glazier.

That'd be a job for Alan Pardue of the Middle Ages, I imagine. Who famously put all the windows in all the buildings in the entirety of London. He did, he did. He keeps telling people that. But yeah, a good time is being had by all. I'm eating a lot of delicious food. I had some lovely, I had pigeon spring rolls yesterday. Which I think, I think. What? You're catching yourself. These are birdwatchers again.

Well I chomped into it and I had a bit of lead shot in my mouth. I was like, oh, bloody hell, I'm glad I didn't chomp down on that too hard. So I've got a bit of, I've got a tiny lead pellet in my pocket. You say that to all the boys, don't you? Yeah, exactly. So what other lovely food you eat? So pigeon spring roll, that's interesting. I mean, it is interesting.

I think they, I would say that I think the chefs have an ago. Do you know what I mean? You know when like, you know, when you go to a really fancy restaurant and there's loads of different really interesting, strange items, but this one just felt like all of the rest of the menu is fine. Absolutely. You know, a lot of, cause it's the seaside, it's a, you know, a lot of scallops and stuff, fish pie and that. And then you get to, and then you get to that monstrosity. I mean, it tastes nice, but it's still not right. There's something not right there.

I guess you have duck spring rolls, don't you? Yeah, it's true. What other stuff you got planned on the agenda in terms of eating? You cooking a lot where you're staying or you're gonna go out to eat? What's on the agenda? Talk us through what would be an absolute textbook

like Pete Danson fueled holiday away. What could our listeners expect to experience today or with you in an Airbnb in rural Northumberland? Well, I've spotted there's a loft in the Airbnb which might be if keen-eared listeners would know that that's always a bit of a problem when I'm around because I am eyeing it up at the moment. But you know, we'll see how bored I get

through the rest of this week. I'd say we'd like, I've only made us a lovely steak dinner with some mashed potatoes. And unlike the one that I cooked in the New Forest, I actually didn't cook that in a microwave. They do have a beautiful oven. But yeah, it's all good. Can't get a phone signal for love, no money. So if anyone's trying to get hold of me, that's, you know, they'll have to go.

That's joyous for everyone involved. They'll have to run up my ribs. Run up my ribs. It annoys me when you keep cooking steaks and not asking me for my great six or seven steps to techniques to making a great steak. I could have helped you out. Give us step two and five. Step two is oil the steak, not the pan.

Ooh. Really? And step five is let it rest for as long as you cook one side of it. Yeah, I mean, the resting thing is fine, but I'm not sure that- Do you know what step seven is, Pete? Get it in your gullet. All right, step seven is enjoy your steak.

Enjoy the perfect steak. Yeah, I would say that I always spend a lot of time with tongs, I didn't have tongs this time, I had scissors. So that I held onto the steak and made sure that I see at the side so that all everything sort of like, you know, keeps in the steak and stuff. But that was quite complex. I didn't have any cooking oil, so I had to cook in butter. So for those people who haven't met Peter, the best way, the scissors on the steak,

there's a very great example of this, I would describe Pete as, when you watch him doing something and going through a process, he does it in a way that you would see an alien who's just visiting earth in a 90s sitcom does things. Well, he's looking at the tongs and he's going, well, they look kind of like tongs. Oh no, they've sliced through the steak nightmare.

Yeah. But yeah, I mean like- Steaks and tiny pieces. We went on a little alien style side quest on Friday afternoon, didn't we, Luke, me and you? Yes, we did, actually. Before our football ramble palladium show, me and you ran over to John Lewis.

I had to buy some pants, not for me, but for a character I may have adopted during the show. And you had to buy, what were you buying? A coat hanger. Well, basically, I forgot my entire wash bag. And I was working from, I was in the office at 8.30 in the morning that day and I was doing shows and I had to travel around doing a few bits.

Then Andy Brasswell took me for a birthday lunch and then we went to a little rehearsal and I was like, right, what I want to do is I want to have a shower and get ready to do the actual show. But I forgot my entire washback. How was it, the big lump of cheese? Yeah. I forgot my entire washback. So what I did was I tried to go to John Lewis to buy

stuff. But when you want to buy something quite specific in John Lewis, I mean, it's fucking impossible because it's massive and no one really helps you. And like, when I say something specific, I mean things like toiletries. What I ended up doing is just fucking crossing the road and going to Boots and got everything I need in about 15 seconds. Yeah. I was walking through John Lewis and I did hear a man's booming voice go, where's the Locutane counter? Have you got a Locutane counter?

And that was you. I think you're being a bit unfair there Peter. Do you want a chance to be more fair about that? You were shouting, I need Locke-Tane. Shouting. Madam, madam get me my Locke-Tane. It was booming, it was a booming voice and I was like that's Luke. He needs, he was looking, I knew he was looking for the Locke-Tane counter but I didn't know he'd just be bellowing about Locke-Tane in John Lewis. First of all I think it's pronounced Loc Loc-suh-tan, isn't it? Loc- what's it? Loc-uh-tan? Yeah, I guess so, yeah.

Loc-uh-tane, Loc-uh-tan. Oh, professional broadcaster can project. Not a headline story, is it? It's projecting a reason. I'm not apologising for that. Anyway, I ended up in boots by a load of cheap stuff, so it doesn't matter. I'm apologizing for that. Anyway, I ended up in boots by a lot of cheap stuff. So it doesn't matter. But yeah, it was nice to,

cause you kept saying to me over and over again on Friday, where can I go and buy some big white wife rumps? And I was saying, I don't know. It's hard to find, hard to find. I don't wear them. I don't wear them. He protested too much. But yeah, we had a good time. Good show was had

by all, I think. And yeah, did you have a good show, Luke? I think we had a good time. Apart from those who were running the Palladium. We did. We did upset the ones. I upset the ones that ran the Palladium because I broke one of their tables during a particularly vigorous part of the show. And it's fair to them. You should be masterbating on stage. I broke the table and apparently they'd say that it's a very expensive table, but it wasn't an expensive table. It was an old wallpaper-paste table, wasn't it? It was a wallpaper-pasting table that I broke by accident.

And yeah, so I don't think we'll be invited back to the Palladium, but that's absolutely fine. We've done it now, haven't it? It was a wallpaper pasting table that I broke by accident. And yeah, so I don't think we'll be invited back to the Palladium, but that's absolutely fine. We've done it now, haven't we? We've got nothing to prove. Yeah, the amount of money they appeared to be asking for for the table was ironic given that if the table did in fact cost that much money, there's no way it would have broken. Oh dear. So yes, that's, that's, that's, we can't perjure ourselves. We don't want to affect the delicate negotiation of how much we're actually going to pay to replace the table by talking about it on this show.

But it was a great night. Lots of fun was had. A few beers afterwards as well, Pete. Blew the froth off a couple of frosty ones afterwards, didn't we? My mate Al went home and was so drunk he tried to queue for his own toilet according to his partner. This is just good stuff. I'll say this with love because I've known Al for a very long time and I love him dearly. He was becoming a problem in the pub. That sounds like him to be fair. He kept shouting at me no matter who I was talking to in the middle of a conversation.

You've just played the London Palladium, Bob Dylan played that. He just kept shouting it over and over again, which was sweet, but also, if I may be so bold, quite annoying. Yeah, yeah. Well, I don't know how he... He said that he hadn't been able to get some tea because he had a haircut. So you can't really blame your own lack of sob because he had a haircut. So it's, I mean, you can't really blame your own lack of sobriety to it, to a haircut really, ascribe it to that.

My friend, my friend Jimmy, the ex fruitarian was told that he couldn't take the bottle of wine he had just opened into the auditorium itself. So he, so he necked the glass of wine he was holding in the other hand, poured the entire rest of the bottle into a plastic pint pot and took it in with him and drunk the whole thing. I think that's absolutely fine. If you're selling a bottle of wine to somebody, why are you not allowed to take that into the... Is it in case you empty it and it rolls down the steps of the palladium? Bang, bang, bang, bang. Bang, bang. Yeah, exactly. He also said to me quite early on at about 11.30, I've got to go because I need to get home because I'm going on holiday tomorrow, flying out quite early. So yeah,

I can't stick around. Then later on that day, night slash morning, I was cycling home, well it was about two o'clock in the morning and so I could pass the pub in the centre of town and he was sat in the window drinking a beer. Oh that's funny. That's awesome that you managed to catch him out. Brilliant. He's one of the people we know and you know there's someone else very close to us who we know as well, he's like this, who literally cannot go past the pub if it's open. I don't know, I think you have to, you've got to pick your days I think. I don't think you can kind of really, I don't know. I think pubs are quite inviting, aren't they? But

less inviting now apparently because they're going to be reducing the size of pints. Yeah. So there's been two stories that have broken presumably off the back of the Labour Party conference, that certain newspapers have been briefed on background or have interpreted certain chats and run stories. One of them has been The Telegraph, which tells its own story, but I will talk about it briefly. One is the idea of reducing the size of pints in the name of public health. The other one is the other story that was briefed, it was picked up by the Telegraph was that a potential reduce of the, of the pub opening hours, reducing last orders by an hour or something. So the pubs actually close at 10 instead of 11, which to me seems

astonishingly bad as an idea, like a terrible, terrible idea. Yeah, I mean, like we, I mean, I don't know why Labour are just fumbling everything, unless the papers just have their knives out as they usually do for a Labour government. But it just seems like the first few weeks of their, of their, of them being in charge has been, apart from like the riots, which I think they probably handled as best as anyone could, I think after that they just seem to be falling onto, like standing on every rake and they're going after the weirdest stuff really early. Do you know what I mean? It just seems like a weird thing to kind of like get involved with. Like, do that a few months in. Don't do that right at the start.

Cause just everyone will be like set against you. Cause fundamentally it isn't like, there isn't enough kind of, there aren't enough opportunities to drink certainly in London, are there? No, the nighttime economy in the big cities in the UK is really a national embarrassment. I mean, I think that,

I think, yeah, we were talking about it earlier. I think, I think when compared to other European capitals, it's just far sickly bad. The very idea that you could reduce it further, the amount of times people get to go out into the pubs and bars and enjoy themselves, it strikes to me not only as a stupid stupid idea, but also something that was gonna harm the economy even further. My take on it is, you know, as a guy in my mid-forties who spent a lot of time living in London

and is feeling sometimes a bit like, you know what, I'm not sure if I'm getting the best out of living in London now, because it's very busy, I don't really go out that much, you know, I've got a young son, should I be living somewhere else? All the kind of natural stuff that a lot of people kind of go through as they get older.

I still feel like I should massively defend the idea that London's an amazing city, and young people wanna fucking come and have a brilliant time. And some older people wanna come and have a brilliant time as well. And it's very much conducive, or should be, conducive to that type of lifestyle.

Like, I feel like you shouldn't reduce the amount of time people can go out because of some fucking daily mail reading nimbies don't like a bit of noise. There's plenty of places in the UK to live which are quiet, plenty. So to me, it feels like we're lagging way behind. So to reduce the number of hours even further, I think would just be a fucking stupid idea. And it also has been proven over and over again to encourage binge drinking as well. Like it's because people want to pile it on as much as they can, start drinking earlier, drink at home, et cetera, et cetera. To me, it just seems like a pointless

idea. I doubt it will ever fucking happen. I think it's just the telegraph trying to stir up a bit of rage. But I mean, would you broadly agree with that, Peter? Because when you go to Berlin, we've been to loads of European cities together, fortunately, you can stay out as long as you want. And if you want to go home, you can still when you go to Berlin, we've been to loads of European cities together, fortunately, you can stay out as long as you want. And if you want to go home, you can still go home. I mean, I used to. I would say the places that have similar drinking cultures to the UK, Japan being a very good example,

I can get a beer 24 hours a day in the mid city, 24 hours a day, very, very easily. And they have drinking culture that is so interwoven with the fabric of their work life, their socializing life that it is a massive problem. But, but the Japanese, they drink all of the time. They drink beers. I mean, it's mainly beer drinking, I guess, rather than anything else. But Koreans are quite famous for it, aren't they? Yeah, I don't know, to be honest. but I just know that work culture in Japan is like as soon as you finish at eight, nine o'clock,

you're out with the boss and you don't go home till the boss goes home. And it's just all that really. So it's- It sounds pretty similar to where we work. Yeah, I guess so, yeah, I guess so. Well, our boss. Yeah, I think that, I'll take your point, but what I'm trying to say is that

clearly there's an issue with the economy being really sluggish in the UK. And a lot of that's geared up towards Europe, the lack of a decent relationship with Europe, which you know, has been done to death. And you know, we've set fire to that relationship unnecessarily in my view for the last eight years or whatever it is, and that's hurting us. But there's a massive untapped amount of resource there in the night time economy, particularly in London. I mean, it's 2024, you have, take last Friday for example, I don't know what time you went home, but we're in a pub,

having a nice time, having a drink in Soho, right? Yeah. The people who live in Soho know what they're getting in Soho. I knew I'd get in Soho. Exactly. You were exactly a great example of that. And it's being policed as an area anyway, because it has to be. And there are other types of establishments open. There are, you know, every single person in that bar has to leave at one.

A big security guard comes around and literally forces everyone to leave. And it just, and then there's nowhere else to go. It just seems insane. Like I'm not talking about a sleepy little village, you know, where, you know, the pub is the pub and everyone goes there and they go, you know, they finish when they finish. I'm not talking about keeping everyone up all night in a little town. I'm not subscribing to that. I'm saying in these big cities full of young people who've got mostly got money to spend, why are we not letting them spend it? I don't think there's any public health effect whatsoever on that. I mean, people are going to do it anyway. They're just going

to go home and drink with supermarket beer. That's really what they're going to do. Yeah. So it's a shame, but I think, and then reducing the measures of the pints, I think is a, I quite like that one. I quite like the idea of having a slightly smaller beer. Cause I drink fizzy lager and by the time, and if it's my first one, I'm seeing that off in like five minutes, like very easily. But,

but the later ones, you're like, they're not fizzy enough for very long. So you're just kind of like, yeah, you're just kind of like, yeah, you just kind of, I wouldn't mind a slightly smaller pint if the price is going to match. But it can't be a smaller pint. It's either a pint or it's not. All right. A smaller drink then.

Hey, Lukey, I think the Luka Piccio should have some kind of open relationship, but an open relationship where we invite adverts into the mix. Is that all right? I think it's probably a good idea. Yeah, that's really good idea. I'm up for that. Definitely. Cause I've not been funny, Pete, but the, um, the magic between you and I has been dying for some time because you are just so ungenerous as a lover. We just need some commercial messaging in here to just, you know, would you gird our loins? I don't know, gild the lily? I don't know, what would you sort of say? Just perk us up a little bit sexually. Yeah, take your pick, take your pick mate. Yeah. Alright. We're back with Luca Beecher, I'm Pete Donaldson joined by Mr. Lukey Moore. Lukey Moore, have you heard of this bridge in Scotland, what dogs jump off?

What? You're doing these, you could be more than that. There's a dog, right, in Scotland. I was sort of looking at her at things to sort of see and do in the north of England, and I just got very distracted. But some might say drawn to this bridge in Western Bartonshire, Scotland, the Overtoun Bridge, completed in 1895, based

on design by the landscape architect H.E. Milner. And since the 1950s, numerous reports of dogs either falling or jumping from the bridge have been reported. Incidents often resulting in serious injury or death upon landing on the rocks some 50 feet below. It's been called the dog suicide bridge. This is terrible. I'm sorry I laugh now. I thought it was a fun joke. It's horrible. Yeah, it's horrible. I think, I mean, obviously everyone's saying it's ghost dogs. Ghost dogs are luring the real dogs to their deaths. Those bloody ghost dogs again.

In reality, they've sort of noticed that most of the dogs that take a jump off it, I mean why you don't leash your fucking dog, I don't know, but a lot of the dogs that do the jump off it are long-nosed dogs who generally have better smell skills. So apparently it may just be rodent urine, the smell of mink down there or whatever. Smell skills. Smell skills. So yeah, there's this dog where all the little doggies jump off to their deaths unfortunately in Scotland.

That's really sad. Very sad. Speaking of, you know, the WiFi I have access to took her a while to get used to the idea that dogs don't really get put on leads that much in the UK. Right, okay. It's not really a culturally something you do in the US. I don't know why, maybe because there's more traffic or I don't know. But anyway, dogs are normally kept on leads all the time in the US. And we were actually in the park going for a walk with our son on Sunday.

And there was this dog running amok and it almost knocked two people off their bikes. And what was weird about it, and you're a dog owner, so you probably know this better than me, but I personally, as someone who's a completely neutral observer, I just found the way the dog owner was behaving to be really fucking weird. Like, because the dog owner was a bit like, oh, well, be careful. It's like, well, no, you be careful.

That's a cycle track. You've got a dog that's running off. Yeah. I would, like, I've never, we never took the dogs off the lead unless it's like a big park that doesn't have any, you know, that there aren't any people around. It's basically a golf course that nobody goes to. That's basically the only times that, or on the beach sometimes we'll have a little run around on the beach sort of thing. But like, it's not really, it's not really the done thing. Especially because like you, you may think your dog has road sense, but like nine times out of 10 they don't. And the only way you

find out by, you know, a visit to the vets, cause your dog's, you know, had its leg run over and stuff. Like it's, it's just, I think it's a very risky thing for someone you love to allow them to just run around and just, you know, all they need to see is one squirrel or one cat or one rabbit and they, you know, they could be, they could really hurt something, hurt themselves or hurt someone else. It's a terrible thing to do. What's your explanation for the Overson Bridge then Peter? What do you think is a foot?

Well, as always, you do sort of read pretty sensible, you know, takes on it by scientific people. You sort of go, yeah, that sounds more likely than ghost dogs luring, you know, alive dogs off the bridge, I would say. In many ways. Disagree. Disagree. Apparently it's got a lot of druid activity over the years and a lot of stuff's gone on there. And so it's definitely, in my view, confirmed supernatural activity. Confirmed supernatural activity. If I were you, I'd steer clear of the ghost dogs. I mean, it's very Harry Potter, isn't it?

It's very Harry Potter again, like you said earlier. It makes sense. Should we end with a couple of quick emails, Peter? Yeah, let's bash around. Lovely. Because I want to let you get back to your lovely holiday, hunting ghost dogs and knitting little jumpers for robins and eating non-traditional spring rolls. Francesca's got in touch. She says, hi guys, I'm here to smash your short King Gavin's record.

I am a 29-year-old woman. I've made it to smash your short King Gavin's record. I am a 29 year old woman. I've made it to the grand height of four foot 11 and I'm actually rapidly losing height due to osteoporosis. So at a monthly checkup, I get my height checked and my nurse already knows how weird I am. So I could probably get her pick for you if you want, but I'm four foot 11. I am officially your shortest listener so far. Take care Francesca. Nice to hear from you Francesca.

That's a pin. That's a pin from Francesca. Nice to hear from you Francesca. That's a pin. That's a pin from Francesca. I mean a literal pin obviously, but like you've got tiny bones anyway and the bones you have got are causing you bother. It's not right. How are your bones at the moment Peter? Absolutely awful look. No one says that do they? My wrist still hurts. I've not got that checked out. That shouldn't still hurt. A couple of months down

the line. Will you basically shamed into getting rid of the wanking mitt because you got the piss taken out of your work? Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. Pretty much everything I do is led by, is led or kind of like cosseted by the prevailing winds of Lucky Moor's opinions. Pleased to be of service. And finally from now, James says, hi guys, just listening to Monday 16th of September episode. And the discussion on, James says, hi guys, just listening to Monday 16th of September episode. And the discussion on shoplifting reminded me of something that happened a few

weeks back. I was down in Brighton awaiting a train home and decided to pop into M&S for some snacks. That is the best place to go. They're normally on big train station concourses. They're M&S foods. You feel like you can treat yourself. You've got cheese wrapped in salami. You've got pork crackling strips. Oh, mid. Treat yourself because you're getting going on the train so you can spend a little bit more money. So it's a good choice, James. He says, I walked in just behind a clearly worse wear bloke in an Aston Villa shirt who staggered straight towards the wine shelves, grabbed the nearest bottle of white, opened it and started necking it. The security came

over and told him to stop to which he replies, I bought this in with me. Fuck off. Um, um, security snatched a bottle off him, asked him to leave. He obliged, but on his way out, grabbed a four pack of Belgian lager and just strolled out into the station. Um, I'd be chuckling most of the journey home. Love the show. If you got the great work, James, don't do that. Don't do that. Some people just have the world right, don't they? They just play the percentages going, no one's going to process me at the police station. I'm not getting arrested for this.

I'm having some cans. See you later. Thanks Marks and Sparks. You're seeing this as quite inspirational, aren't you? Inspirational for you, this. Yeah, I do. Yeah. I think they've got the cheat code.

They've got the Konami code for free lager and wine. Remember, if you do fancy shoplifting some beer or wine from an M&S, there's a loophole in the law of England and Wales that says if it's in a train station, they can't nick you for it. They can't get you, yeah. No, no. Train rules.

If you scream train rules before the police officer can read you your rights, it's a loophole. He's got, yeah, yeah, exactly. Alright Pete, take us out of here. We've been The Lookin' Pete Short and we will continue to be The Lookin' Pete Short in our private lives. But then on Thursday you'll be hearing us again doing what we do fifth best on The Lookin' Pete Short. What do you do fourth best? It's probably, I do do a good poached egg every now and again. I'm getting better at my poached eggs.

What a top five that sounds like the making of. The top one is love making. Right, we'll be back on Thursday. Look after yourselves. Give us an email. Hello lookbcho.com. All that guff. My top one's complaining. Bye. The Luke and Pete show is a stack production and part of the A-Cast Creator Network.