The Luke and Pete Show - Don’t put silver balls in your ears

Episode Date: August 10, 2023

Luke and Pete both share a house with people and pets that don't respect them. Today, in hearing all about that Pete ends up doing an impression of his dog and telling us about the creative way he stopped the pup he has access to from licking his own nethers.Elsewhere, we hear about an extremely valuable arcade machine that was found in the street and marvel at Matt Hancock’s latest venture into content creation.Want to get in touch with the show? Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow.We're also now on Tiktok! Follow us @thelukeandpeteshow. Subscribe to our YouTube HERE. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

it's the luke and pete shaw on thursday the 10th of august my name is pete donaldson i'm joined by mr lukey miller lucky mill how the devil are you sir not bad how's it going we're both tired boys i think yeah what's your excuse um my partner got back from a trip from Mallorca. I think it was Mallorca. Yeah, Mallorca. Late last night. And then I was up with the dogs quite early. So one dog gets up quite early when she sees the sun rising.

And the other one sleeps in. But if you're up with one, you're up with both. Yeah. They just need dinner. I did tell you about dinner. need dinner I did tell you about dinner breakfast I did tell you about

I did advise you to not get one dog because I need to tell the truth on the other because it would be confusing when it comes to meal times great for riddles

yeah really good it's really up my riddle game it really has and so one gets up and it's bark bark bark then the other one just goes

alright I'm getting up. I'll get up then. I'll do some barking. Do they? Well, one of them doesn't bark because she's a bit older. But Sammy is very much the barker. But it's not really just his age.

It's not really a bark. It's more of a shriek. See it? Ha! It's like that. Ha! I'm like, mate, I've just fed you. I'm working. What do you need from me? He's like that I'm like mate I've just fed you

I'm working what do you need from me he's like and I've no idea why no idea why yeah well probably

I've just cut off his balls so yeah that's part of it that was the weird thing so he had his he had his testiculars removed his particular testiculars and

I thought the scrotum would be tightened up. Like, I thought they'd sort of do something. It's just flap around like a tobacco pouch, is it? Yeah, it's flapping around. It's hilarious. It would probably start to shrink. It will start to shrink, yeah, but it is bloody funny.

Yeah. Speaking of people in the house that don't respect me, or you, yeah, my son gets up very early. He gets up at like, sometimes, well, to be fair, he's all right from 9pm-ish through to about 4am. Yeah. Which is pretty good going.

And then he's just up there, high-performance podcast on, cup of coffee. I'm like, why are you sitting in the uncomfortable chair again? Rise and grind, Luke. Yeah, you know, he looks out, he doesn't call me Luke. coffee. I'm like, why are you sitting in the uncomfortable chair again? Rise and grind, Luke. Yeah, you know, he looks out, he doesn't call me Luke, he looks out and he's obviously reasonably

at like 5.30 in the morning this time of year, he's going, well, it's light outside, so why would I not want to get up? It's a good point, actually, yeah. And I'm saying to him, yeah, but, you know, I promise you, you won't sleep till 8.30 when it starts. I spoke to an American a few weeks ago and they were going,

I love this country, but it just gets too light too early. It's funny, isn't it? In that way, I thought they'd be broadly in the same ballpark. I don't really know how it works. I found it very interesting when I was in Iceland in February. It didn't get light until about 10.30 in the morning. And then up in Scotland in July, up on Skye, it doesn't get dark

until like 11pm right yeah that's fair which is really weird I've been I've come out of a bar at 2am with my reputation and it's been

absolutely it's been light it's just very very weird very strange it's always quite depressing looking back on it when you used to go out on the big

on the big one and you'd still be out and it'd be getting light you'd start hearing the birds you'd start hearing the birds I don't want to be here I don't want to be here I've when I used to go out on the big one and you'd still be out and it'd be getting light. You'd start hearing the birds. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be here. When I used to go out, I used to,

certainly in Leicester, when I was absolutely S-faced, I was, I'd try and climb on like buildings in the town and stuff and I remember the sun coming up and I was still on the top of a building and I was like,

I need to go home. This is, this is. People listening to that will think it's a bit like Dawson's Creek. It's romantic. No,

it's burglar. It's not, it's just you. No, I was just. Covered in that anti-climbing paint on the way down.

Yeah. I used to love doing that but it's so dangerous. That's how you tell the difference between someone who likes to have a good time and someone who's got

proper sesh fiend is the sound of birds chirping and it's starting to get light doesn't affect them doesn't phase them no

but for me it's like oh no I need to get home now yeah I need to be home and just get home as quick as I can pretend to myself

this didn't happen and then wake up at 11 and go that's not too late I can probably just about get away with a normal day now. Have a day, yeah.

But some people just crack on through, don't they? Straight through crew. Yeah. I sort of woke up on Sunday and I remember that Sammy had sat on the bed and his little bum had made a little mark on the bed. Poo? Clothes.

And I was like, you know what? At least it wasn't me. No one's going to believe that. No one's going to believe that. She didn't. He did a little poo. He to believe that no one's going to she didn't he did a little poo he did a little poo he didn't do a poo

just his bum his bum had done some pooing and where he'd sat down he'd clearly done that little thing where he'd sort of scoot along which is which is funny

on the bed on the bed he respects nothing obviously I've never owned a dog so if you if you take your dog out for a walk right

and he does a poo yeah and it's like a messy one do you not give it a wipe? nah it's usually fine it usually just dries out I guess

but yeah for some reason he just has no self respect do they lick their own bums or not? I think that's a bit of a misnomer I don't think he really sort of cats do

he has a good go at his his testicle scar he has a good go at his stitches he's not supposed to have a cone on for that he did have a cone, but then he just kept walking into stuff. Yeah, that's what my cat did, yeah.

And so he got one of those inflatable... It looks like he's going on holiday. Like a travel pillow. To sleep on a plane? Yeah. Oh, nice. And he just sort of separates. And that kind of helps.

I might get one myself. He's taken to it like a duck to water. It's Christoph. And if he was in water, he'd presumably float. So he's still licking his nuts even though he's got that on. He's still licking his nuts. Shall we see how much we can do about your dog licking his nuts? I think we've exhausted

it. Do another impression of your dog barking again? Ha! He's got a bit of Tom Jones about it. Yeah, he's got a bit of Tom Jones about it. So Peter, Rory's back from his holiday now. He is, yeah. But he's not listening to this record because he's got a bit of Tom Jones about it so Peter Rory's back from his holiday now he is yeah he's

not listening to this record because he's got to catch up on all his work yeah he's so he didn't listen to the second show that we recorded last so that would

have been Monday's show we did loads of stuff on him didn't we did a load of stuff on Rory and he's not listened so that'll teach him no exactly and on

the first piece of shit I just really haven't caught him no don't why because we need him we do need him on Monday

not Monday last Thursday I bet you £10 a ball left on the table for pool that's right and you didn't

take it up because you don't want to spend time with me in it I want to play the pool and I want to do the darts

but we need a third we need that ring toss thing someone who I think owns a pub in East London said that they said that they've got one I want to play the pool and I want to do the darts but we need a third we need that ring toss thing so someone who I think owns a pub in East London said that they said that they've got one

it's like a mini one I mean like I'm one from the ceiling the PDC got in touch they were offering us darts didn't they the PDC

yeah exactly you should definitely do that I've got a dart board at home now yes you have yes we both have in fact we should be practising oh good ok

we've got no excuses and how's it all going with the tax bill? Still remains half unpaid. I paid half of it. Yeah. Yeah, I'll give them the other half. They're not on your back, no? I've not had a text.

Do you reckon a payment of any kind triggers some kind of system where they don't get in touch with you for a while? Oh, do you reckon what? Could be. So if you send them a tenner... If they've got a system, they probably know to look how much money you've given them.

It's like the old, you know that kind of funny meme thing about how, you know, someone was on Facebook saying, I haven't paid my TV licence, I forgot, but I've been watching TV for the last three months. Right.

Do you think I'll get in trouble? Yeah. And someone replied saying, the BBC couldn't find 40 paedophiles in their own building for the entire 1980s. I think you'll be okay. They're going to find you. Do you reckon it's the same with tax?

It's such a big system that it's impossible to... I don't think anyone should go down with that idea under the auspices of that. But you're saying that... It's not like student loan. You just move a few times and they forget about you. But you appear to be doing that. No, I don't.

I just couldn't afford to pay him. So I was just like, all right, I'll just do it next month. Okay. Take the fine. Because if you get in trouble on the old tax front, they do offer you a monthly thing, don't they, after all? Do they, right? I think so, yeah.

Yeah, but you've got to ring them up and go, can I pay a bit this way? Do you know how I know about that? Why? Which person do we both know that would fall foul of that? Think about it now. From the rambleble think about it now right yeah yeah i thought yeah okay what he just forgot to do it or he didn't have the resources or he didn't put enough away delete any of those things couldn't he yeah he got his foot in a bucket and fell downstairs and

all of those one of our other friends sometimes hears about it from that friend. Right, okay. And has to somehow take responsibility for trying to sort it out, as you can probably imagine.

Oh, wow. That's not his job. Moving on. Good. Speaking of thousands and thousands of dollars or pounds,

did you see this story about this arcade machine that someone left outside their house called Disco-Tron? Sorry, Discs of Tron. Disco-Tron. Such a dad.

Oh, Disco-Tron. It's like a 1983 arcade game machine based on Tron, right? Which, by the way, is a Disney film. I didn't know that was a Disney film.

Tron? Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, someone got rid of it because obviously it's massive and they didn't want it anymore. Yeah, it was in someone's garage, wasn't it? It was worth $10,000. Yeah, so it was just...

Imagine being like a big retro video game enthusiast. Imagine being someone who just really knows their stuff. You've just won the lottery seeing that. Well, yeah. And so the daughter of the who's uh sort of was was riding around on a on a bike and she said dad uh there's a there's a big arcade machine that you probably like there's just been left in the street and he's like yes dear it goes out he goes that's worth 10 grand yeah but i kind of thought they were really expensive anyway um yeah the problem with

cabinets is that everything was made in the 80s everything had uh capacitors that go bad things that explode things that get too hot uh electricity is very expensive like there's there's so many things that can go wrong in those cabs especially the more complex ones like this one was like a big kind of surroundy kind of uh games machine so it wasn't just like a uh stand up and play like one-armed bandit kind of configuration. It was like a whole thing. And so these things are just really heavy, they get really hot, and they were made in the 80s,

so they shouldn't have lasted this long. Sounds like me, actually. Yeah, they get really heavy, really hot. I am all those things. And according to the article I read about it, it had obviously just been kept in a garage somewhere because the person who looked at it estimated it had been played less than 3,000 times. It was in mint condition.

Right. Had every original piece and all the lights and monitor were working. Yeah. So like it's a great, it's a holy grail find. I popped round to the guy who runs the video game shop.

Like there's a video game shop about 300 yards from my house and I just never go in there I just never for whatever reason I mean it's all retro stuff so there's you know you don't see

new stuff in there but like it's all retro stuff and he knows and next door you used to have like an arcade so it was like

25 old 1980s arcade machines like your Chase HQ your Operation Wolf your Outrun stuff like that Operation Wolf what a classic

I forgot about that that's the one with the gun and the sequel Operation Thunderbolt oh I don't forgot about that. That's the one with the gun. And the sequel, Operation Thunderbolt. Oh, I don't know about that one, yeah. And he had, like, loads of cabs, and it was called Neon Knights, and it was brilliant.

But he got rid of all of them, and I said, what made you get rid? And he went, the electricity. Just the electricity. And those aren't, like like flat panel TV screens. These are cathode ray tubes, lights, flashing lights, things that go wrong, things that go...

So even just to turn all his gear on in the morning. Yeah, it was just absolutely ridiculous electricity. And so the economics of it is that if I buy one of those things that's got a coin slot, I just take all the money every day. There's no rent paid or anything like that. I think with those you usually just put them on freebies. So he would just...

It wouldn't be a coin thing. It would be like you just come in here for £7 I'm going to come and play all the games. If I owned an arcade back in the day you just purchase the machine and then you take all the money or I guess rent there's probably

like a rental scheme I guess as well it's kind of fascinating because we went Wi-Fi of Accenture and I were in Torquay a while back

and we had some time to get before we went for dinner and me being American doesn't really have an idea of like a seaside kind of

arcade in the uk yeah they have different things in the us but so we went in and we played the bullseye fruit machine for like two hours and it was really good fun yeah um but i was thinking to myself and we won a bit of money we lost a bit of money against a gambling machine i guess and it wasn't like an arcade machine i was thinking like you would probably if you had people playing them all day absolutely money spinner that's why they're there you could pull some pull some decent cash You would probably, if you had people playing them all day. Absolutely money spinner. That's why they're there.

You could pull some decent cash back. From what is essentially a gambling addiction issue. Yeah, issue. I would very much like, you've probably never seen one, but you know the pachinko parlours in Japan, where it's just, it's a little bit like a cross pachinko, it's like a bagatelle game. Ball comes down from the top of the thing and it sort of bounces off little pegs

and it falls in. Oh, I know, yeah. And so you go in, you give them 20 quid or whatever and they just give you a big bowl of silver. Like that? Yeah. I mean, a fucking cacoph silver. A lot. Yeah. I mean,

here, a fucking cacophony. So loud. So they give you these little steel balls but they give you absolutely loads of them and for every ball

it's worth a cent or a pence or whatever. And it's so loud so people just get the balls and put them in their ears. So you walk around and it's like, how can everyone

Don't do that. How can everyone manage this cacophony? It's because they've all got silver balls in their ears. As doctors listen to this, just take your own earplugs. Just take your own earplugs. Don't put silver balls in your ears. Don't put silver balls in your ears. They put them in the machine

and they turn the dial. I don't really know how it works, but they turn the dial and you get more balls back than you put in. And then you have to, because gambling is illegal in Japan, you have to, because gambling is illegal in Japan, you have to exchange all of the balls for a voucher and then you tottle off around the corner to a different

company, it's completely separate, and you exchange your voucher for the money. So it's like a Baltimore drug deal? Yeah. Yeah, pretty much. You get a little talk. You give your money to a kid, he runs that way, tells that guy, he tells that guy, brings the drugs and no one ever sees the money being exchanged for the drug. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get a little talk. You give your money to a kid, he runs that way, tells that guy, he tells that guy,

brings the drugs and no one ever sees the money being exchanged for the drugs. It's almost like how they used to do it when they didn't have a license to sell alcohol.

Alexandra Palace, have you remember that? No, I don't remember that at all. You used to go in, you'd buy 10 vouchers for £10 and then little tickets. You'd go to the bar

and it would be like five tickets for a beer. Right. And you'd give them the tickets. So you to the bar, and it'll be like five tickets for a beer. And you give them the tickets. So you're not technically buying. I mean, that just seems like, the admin to set up that scheme would mean that loophole would just be closed so quickly. I think it was Alexander Palace.

It's kind of a weird situation. Changing the subject ever so slightly, when I was looking through things to talk about today, just thinking on the way in what we could talk about, I saw on TikTok a Matt Hancock video. He's still doing them. He's still doing them? Was that when he was on the beach?

On the beach, yeah. Was he singing? He was singing, wasn't he? I was like, this must be old. It's recent. He's still doing it. Even on holidays, he's producing content. What a content monster.

But the thing is, the universe has decided, and people may think this is a bit rich coming from me, but the universe has decided that people don't want to hear any more of his shit. Right, yeah. So why is he still doing it? I don't know. I just think he's got a commitment to the content.

He's still an MP, by the way. He's still an MP. Is he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought he'd... Yeah, and he can get away with that. Well, he's just making politics pal, by the way. He's still an MP. Is he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he can get away with that. Well, he's just making politics palatable for the youth. He's still an MP,

a member of Parliament of West Suffolk. So he's not been any kind of by-elect or anything like that. So apparently he's still representing his constituents, as is the great, your friend of mine, Nadine Dorries. Yeah. Said she was resigning, and apparently, since she said she was resigning, with immediate effect, and to now, she's still

not put her papers in, is longer than Liz Truss was Prime Minister. What I don't get is that the Prime Minister could do without these distractions. So why doesn't he just, like, maybe he just doesn't need another resignation. He's got no power, has he?

Yeah. He's just got no actual power. Yeah. But he can't even stop people climbing his own house. I bet you, I first saw that happening. I saw people climbing up onto the roof of his house. Yeah.

Which I thought actually was... Crossed a line, did it? Did it cross a line? I think it's poor form. I think it's poor form. I'll tell you why. Right. Because I think that's poor form I'll tell you why right because I think that

if you want to be you want to take the high ground about all the awful shit they're doing I don't think it's the most helpful thing to us to do awful shit well as a previous

building climber myself well exactly exactly obviously that's why I brought you in I mean there's no guarantee it was the house

he was residing in at any point you know what I mean it's his main residence it was the house he was residing in at any point. You know what I mean? It's his main residence. Yeah. He's probably got a few, hasn't he? He lives on Down Street, because he's a prime minister, obviously.

He's probably got a few, hasn't he? Do you understand what I mean, though, or do you not share that opinion? I think... So where do you draw the line? Where do you draw the line, yeah. Okay, so climbing the house, that's one thing. Osborne's Wedding.

Where do you stand on that happiest day of their lives I think that that was probably I think that's probably poor form right but I think

throwing a milkshake on Farage decent yeah that's fine yeah no but my point is this it's interesting isn't it because what we're talking about here rightly or wrongly

are politicians that we don't personally like, right? So that's fine. Right. But at some point, there is a line, isn't there? If someone walked up to, say, Sunak, I mean, it's actually quite mental that the Prime Minister could have that lax security anyway. That does seem strange.

Probably because he's decimated the public purse and there's no one around to do it. But if, for example, if it was a politician you didn't like, is it fair game, even though they've... So say, okay, say like Priti Patel, who's explored some horrendous policies. Her and Bravman have done some awful shit, right? Someone punches them in the face.

Well, of course not. Okay, so there is a line there. Milkshake in the face. Yeah, that's fine. It's boiling hot and they've been blinded. It had little nuts in it. Everyone's got an idea of where the line is drawn, is what I'm saying.

And I think you can't afford, in principle... Shout it through the letterbox. Fuck off. 3am. They're on their own at home. Fuck off. They've just watched a horror movie. They're unsettled already.

But my point is that I think you can't afford to kind of, you can't afford to let people get away with shit just because it's politicians you think are dickheads. I guess is what I'm saying. I think you were hoping for me to say that there wasn't a line, but I think there is a line. I'm surprised you think there is. Yeah, I think there is a line.

And it's climbing the house. No, that's fine. That's fine. I'll decide where the line is. But there is a line. I just think if you're at home on your own and you're thinking, someone on the roof

of my house that's quite unsettling isn't it? If I mean we might not have lost Rod Hull if he'd had a bit of help

that's all I'm saying. That was a Man United game I think he was trying to get something from. I wonder what Man United game that was it was in Europe

wasn't it? It was in Champions League. I think it might have been yeah. I wonder whether they won. And this brings me on to my next question on this subject. On terrestrial presumably as well. Would have been, yeah. I wonder whether they won. And this brings me on to my next question on this subject.

On terrestrial presumably as well. Would have been ITV, wouldn't it? What year was it? Should he have really been running a digital signal by then anyway? No, I think because it would have

had to have been terrestrial. He wouldn't have been getting sky through an aerial, would he? There's enough time past that we can joke about this because it was 25 years ago. Yeah, it's fine.

I'll try that. I don't think any of the family would listen. We have, on occasion, on Wrestle.me, had contact from old Wilder Spot

wrestlers' sons, and then they're invariably, like, wild with their suggestions. Oh, really? Absolutely wild. So here you go,

the Rod Hull thing, on the night of 17th March 1999, Rod Hull was trying to adjust the television area on the roof of his bungal 1999, Rod Hull was trying to adjust the television area on the roof of his bungalow at half time

during Inter Milan versus Man United in the Champions League. The year Man United won the Champions League, of course, when he slipped and fell and suffered a severe skull fracture

and chest injuries and was pronounced dead on arrival at a local hospital in Hastings. So he fell off a bungalow and fractured his skull. It was pretty severe.

Yeah. I thought he went through a glass roof. It doesn't say that in. I thought he went through a glass roof. It doesn't say that in that report. I mean, it's possible. And then, because what I wanted to ask you about was, for example, the Just Stop Oil thing. Right, yeah.

So they're doing a load of basically annoying shit, right? Yeah. And you could argue philosophically they're doing more harm than good to their cause because people just think they're such dickheads and they're not going to get anywhere. But here's the thing. A lot of the debate about this

and a lot of the complaints about this are like, well, don't do it here because it's inconvenient. It's like, well, what do you want them to do? Do you understand what protesting actually entails? It's the Hurricane Rainbow armband, isn't it? It's just like, what do you think a protest is? What do you think this is for? It is to inconvenience

and pressure governments to make changes that need to be made. Exactly. Because, I don't think anyone's saying that if Just Stop Oil sat in the corner

of an empty building in the middle of nowhere, anything would happen. No one would even know they're doing it, would they? That's the point. I'm just looking at

our album artwork. They've been at us. It's orange. They've turned it orange. I think that was done because no one could find an orange podcast at the time. Nice, I like that.

That shows a level of thought that I wouldn't usually level at this show. It wasn't you or I. No, okay, fair do. It was someone much better informed than us. And then Peter,

finally for now on the politics side of it because people will find it tedious. Have you seen that basically Donald Trump has descended into really just a mob boss now? Yeah, I mean, we're obviously recording this on Monday and the show goes out on Thursday. So things may very well have changed.

He may very well be enjoying... Wait, my turn's a good bloke. Between now and Thursday. He might have been visited by three ghosts and he might change his ways. But I think very much he's staring down the barrel of some pretty hefty charges. And he's been tampering with witnesses. A couple of things he did, what I enjoyed from the footage,

was wrapping his knuckles on the desk in the courtroom while staring at the attorney. Which is a classic mob boss move. And now he's just going to all these, on his own personal social media and just intimidate witnesses. Yeah. In plain sight. Even the mafia did that at home later on

when no one was around. The thing that gets me is like that he, you expect so little from that man and you expect so little from that breed of politician that when he does these things that are literally against the law you just almost think well he's going to get away with it because he he's just the guy who does this sort of thing and everything's been eroded you're right it's a massive test and and it's hard to preside over a country uh in in i mean and god knows how much presiding that man does

because he is, you watch some of his and you're like, who is running the country? Who, Biden's? Biden's, you've got McConnell

over the other side, you're like, what, what is happening? The world's going to shit. We've got these old men who just keep falling off stuff.

So the talk about Biden is that, like, legislatively he's a very successful president, right? He's got a team around him, very competent, they've passed a lot of legislation, very impactful stuff, job numbers are massive, that's the chat. But obviously, it's all packaged up

in, like, a very old guy who has had a lifelong stammer as well, by the way, which people don't make a connection between. Oh, okay, because he's old, they just assume that he's old. Yeah, he's had that stammer for basically his whole adult life. And then on the other side, you've got't make a connection between. Oh, okay, because he's old. They just assume that he's old. Yeah, he's had that stamina for basically his whole adult life. And then on the other side, you've got people like, yeah, I mean, I think I genuinely believe,

I felt the same with Liz Truss. You put Trump in a room of a selection of voters, I think he'd be the stupidest person in there, which is kind of wild to think of. The thing that gets me is that he, after his speeches, you do have to sort of. The thing that gets me is that he, after his speeches, you do have to sort of decode them a little bit. It's going, what was he referring to there?

And it'll just be bits of Fox News he's watched. Yeah. Or something that happened to him in the 80s. Yeah. It's really bizarre stuff. Very strange. I think it's a big test because, you know, if people can behave with impunity

just because they're super powerful, that doesn't bode well, does it? Well, he, I mean, he's literally just trying to, I mean,

his only, I mean, he, like you said before, he could be president from jail, but he needs, he needs to get the presidency. Otherwise he's really,

so, you know, there, there are some things he could do to limit his exposure to some of these things if he's president. But if he's not, he's in all kinds of trouble. But obviously it's political risk for Biden's lot

because they're like, well, you know, it'll just be seen as a political incarceration. But I guess the right are always going to think that whatever happens. Yeah, because I guess just the optics don't look good. The idea, I know it isn't like this, but like the idea on paper of quote unquote jailing your political opponents is a bad look, right? It's Putin-esque.

It's not like Putin and Navalny, is it? It's completely separate. If the guy's going to do loads of crimes in plain sight, you're kind of damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you let him get away with it... You have to do something. The key thing is, you're right to tack on to this, because the key thing is

when he's president it's an impeachment process which is so flawed, because it's so politically partisan depending on the makeup of the different houses when he's not president he's in theory subject to any kind of legal process that anyone else would be, although his lawyers

would kind of argue against that, because obviously they would and then this January 6th thing comes down to First Amendment freedom of speech versus political, basically incitement to violence because freedom of speech, it doesn't cover inciting violence. And whether we like it or not,

forget all the rhetoric, forget all the media coverage, in the Capitol, on January 6th, the Capitol riots, people fucking died. People actually died. And they died at the hands of people

who professed to be the party of law and order, the party of Blue Lives Matter, all this nonsense. So the whole thing is completely fucked, and if you look at Trump's comments and his behaviour leading up to that, to me it's like open and shut. You can talk about,

oh, he didn't actually mean it, but he said it. Apparently Pence rang him around Christmas wishing him a happy Christmas and a happy New Year and he just went yeah yeah yeah

and Sue was like oh can't you pretend that I won the election I'm ringing you to say happy fucking Christmas you melt it would be a happy Christmas do you know how

anyway that's a good break when we come back we'll do some batteries because we've got our friends here Katie and James and interestingly named Hammy'll do some batteries because we've got our friends here Katie and James and the

interestingly named Hammy have sent some batteries in so we better get to those good old Ham we're back with our dodgy dossier

of battery brands that you've been sending in if you spot an interestingly named battery brand do get in touch hello at loonpeachshow.com or you can get us on

Twitter or YouTube. It'd be confusing to send it via YouTube in the comments. But hey, you do you. You do you. We'll be reading them. We'll be reading them. You're always on YouTube. I'm always on YouTube.

Looking at magnet fishing. Looking at magnet fishing. Hi, Logan Pete, says Katie. This is Katie from Chicago, soon to be from somewhere near London due to work. I'll give you a battery submission in exchange for advice about living in the UK and an explanation on how anyone affords to live in london i present to you a i present you a just in case triple a just in case just in case so it's a great battery

it's a brand new player so congratulations to you katie for sending in a new player just in case AAA yeah and the photo she submitted she's got a cat in the photo who looks exactly like one of my cats wow what do you reckon he's been popping up in Chicago

could be the other day Cheese Wells or whatever they call it Cheese Curds Cheese Curds is that Chicago or is that Canada

that's Toronto isn't it ah shit it doesn't matter deep dish the other day I was in't matter deep dish the other day I was in the living room yeah I was in the living room

and I heard cats fighting really badly I was like fuck one of my cats getting hurt walked all the way through the house downstairs into the garden just both of my cats

fighting each other fucking pointless finally had enough what are you doing I said what are you doing and they both just like stopped it and just wandered off

you gotta live together guys but Hercules had just had a mouth full of Magnus' fur so like really so really going for it then yeah nice I like it

so anyway new player Katie congratulations to you she says advice on how anyone are forced to live in London well Pete doesn't live in London anymore

no got out but you did for a while and I do still live in London. Any advice for Katie? Shoplifting, drug dealing, any of those really. It does help. Climb a building and scream how much money you want people to give you.

I would say that you don't always have to shop in Sittingsbury. It's not helping. It's like the Tory MP telling the young person how they can afford a house. You don't always have to shop in Sittingsbury. It's not helping. It's like the Tory MP telling the young person how they can afford a house. You don't always have to pay the fare on the bus.

Sneak on, sneak off. Depends, doesn't it? Depends. That video the other day about the police grabbing that lady and her kid. Yeah. And she had bought a ticket. Yeah. So you've got to be careful.

Exactly. So what message are they sending? Don't buy one. Don't worry about it. Honestly, I would say to young people, presumably Katie's are they sending don't buy one don't worry about it honestly I would say to young people presumably Katie's young I don't know

she might not be coming to London is it's quite hard and housing is a joke and everything's expensive and if you can afford to

sorry if you can help it move to somewhere else just commuting I would say like like mould is a big thing in london it is apparently all of a sudden yeah and i would say that my uh flat in soho that i um lived in um i i didn't have mold but i made mold for poor cleaning practices so So I like to think that I took my mouldy destiny

into my own hands and sort of introduced mould to the house by not necessarily keeping the bathroom dry enough. Well, don't do that. That's the same. You used to use your oven as a cupboard. I did use my oven as a cupboard. And to eat takeaways every night.

I still do that. And when you lived... I have three this weekend. Sarah was away. In a weekend? Yeah. Which ones? Let me guess them. I can guess. All right, Friday night. I still do that. And when you lived... I have three this weekend. Sarah was away. In a weekend? Yeah. Which ones? Let me guess them.

I can guess. All right. Friday night. Chinese. Yeah. Saturday night. Chinese. No.

Okay. Pizza. Yeah. Yeah. And Sunday night, last night. Chinese. No.

What? Burger. What do you mean, burger? Burger. Where from? A burger shop. I don't know. It's all fucking burgers. She just went into the liver and just went, burger. Burger. Where from? A burger shop. I don't know.

It's all fucking burgers. She just went into the liver and just went burger. Burger please. Yeah, burger me. I use Honest for my burger orders. Honest Burger.

What do they have? Do they have ones that like piss about with peanut butter and stuff? Nah, nah, nah. Peanut butter and jelly. I do a tribute burger, a chilli burger.

They do a chicken and truffle and pesto burger. Nice. And they do rosemary salted chips. And do you know why I use Honest in Norbury? Right. Because.

They treat me with a bit of respect. They take the order serious. Right. They don't put gherkins in. They package it up properly. Yeah. Good box. Nice.

With some air vents. And they really say, they must really say to the delivery driver. Don't piss about. Fucking get out there now. Because the other day, I'll tell you something now. The other day, I commented this you something now. The other day,

I commented this to the wife I had access to at the time. You sound like Kevin Keegan. We're still fighting for this trifle. She was very impressed because she said, I want Mexican. I said, I'm not having Mexican.

I'll get you a Mexican because there's a Mexican near us and I'm going to get an honest burger. So I'll fancy that. Fine. So we did hers. All good. Honest burger.

Check this out. I ordered a burger and fries from them with some good on this burger check this out I ordered a burger and fries from them with some chipotle mayo as a dip I ordered it at 8.28 they dispatched it

at 8.35 nice well that's London for you though that's the good thing there's just so much more choice Susan Perb

Susan Perb so yeah you probably can't have that many takeaways if you haven't got any money. That's the thing. That is true. Anyway, good luck to you.

But well done for moving. Yeah, good luck. Good luck to you, Katie. Listen, I'll tell you what. You've got a new player entering the game. Yeah. It started well. It's a great start to your career.

Dear the Luke and the Pete, while on holiday in Japan, yes, Pete, I hope you made it or make it soon too, at 6 a.m. before my friend is awake, I finally find the time to send in the batteries that I found in my parents house I wanted to partake for three years now

I've been going through the back catalogue in 2020 and listening since then but my household only had standard energisers Duracell and Panasonic

and since my fellow Germans have been quicker than me with the cheap brands Jaa and Gut and Gutstig which I took out this email

I present to you the following in red Sonderpreis Baumarkt yeah that's In red, Sanderpries Baumarkt. Yeah, that's a new player, obviously. Sanderpries Baumarkt. That's obviously a new player. Nice.

And Grundig, classic, absolute German, like German radio company from the 1930s. They went insolvent in 2003. Why has nobody licensed the Grundig name? It was huge, big in the game. Sonderpries Baumarkt, right? licensed the Grundig name? It was huge, big in the game. Someone did with Toshiba, right? Yeah. Grundig are not new players.

Sonderpreis-Bohmarkt are, that means special price hardware store in English. Nice. Okay. And finally for now, James has come in

with Judo. They were in the remote for the aircon that I panic bought during last year's heatwave. I'm not sure why it warrants having a remote when it only really works if you're a couple of feet away from it anyway. So, yeah, good stuff.

Judo's not a new player, I'm afraid, James. I like the text work. I like the font. I like the type of face. It looks nice. It's like green and gold as well, which is pleasing. Bit of a tribute to the original Man United kit. But not a new

player I'm afraid. So look, Hammy and Katie, congratulations to you. Commiserations to you James, but thanks for playing. Always nice to hear

from listeners when they've got batteries in their greasy mitts. Smashing stuff. Well we have been, let's get out of here, we have been the Luke and Pete show.

I've been the Pete compliment of that and Luke's been Luke. We'll be back on Monday for more of this. The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack production and part of the acast creator network