The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 128: Betwixtmas

Episode Date: December 27, 2018

We're in that weird period of time between Christmas and New Year where no-one is really doing much of anything apart from you poor souls that have no choice but to go into work. This episode is for you, we got your back.For the rest of us, this week means leftover food, TV specials, the pub and taking it easy. Go on, you deserve it. Also, listen out for a treat of an email involving an enthusiastic approach to a school talent show.Now go get yourself another sherry, it's Christmas. Oh, and we're on [e-mail] should you need us...***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Peloton all-access membership separate. Learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running. Silence, theme tune. Pete Donaldson with you. Silence! Theme tune. Pete Donaldson with you. I'm joined by Luke Muir. Luke, we have not prepared this studio properly. We've got the wrong Mike Muff song.

We've got the On The Continent Mike Muffs instead of the Radio Stakhanov ones. Oh, yeah. And I'm feeling very uneasy about this situation. No one would know. Do you want me to change it for you? No, because I'll make a rustling sound. You've already admitted that you're going to take your jumper off at some point during the recording. Just trying to give you a bit of prior notice.

I don't know. I have just had a big sandwich, and then I made the rookie mistake of watching a load of videos of, you know those cows fitted with sort of portholes on the side? Yeah, I didn't really know about this until you told me about it, and I was sickened. I mean, I was already sickened by the dairy industry in the background of my mind anyway. Except you start your day with a yogurt

with a smile on your face. And porridge. And porridge, yeah, exactly. So like some cows to check out their digestion because they've got many chambers in their stomach get fitted with

what can only be described as a little gas tank tap, I suppose, what you'd call it. You know, like when you have a car and your petrol cap affects it. It looks exactly like a petrol cap. Yeah, and they undo it and the farmer can look inside

and see what's happening in the stomach, which is fascinating. It is fascinating. And he gets his hand inside and he grabs out some of the food that's been eaten. And the cow doesn't even blink an eyelid. I don't really like the idea. I mean, I can sort... I don't really like the idea of any of blink an eyelid i don't really like the idea i mean i can

sort i don't really like the idea of any of it but i don't i particularly don't like the idea of the someone going in there not interfering interfering yeah i just like one of those it reminds me of that groucho marx quite you know groucho marx where he says don't put your hand in my stomach dickhead yeah leave cows alone no he says um outside a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Right. And inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. It reminds me of that. That's a good joke.

I don't like the idea of that happening. And also, I find that as we move on, I know we took the mickey out of Petter. Is it Petter? Petter. For some reason, I call him Peter, probably because I'm friends with you. We took the mickey out of them the other week,

and I thought that was legitimate and fun, but I am sort of aware that the cruelty to animals thing, there's a bit of a sea change going on, isn't there? And there's going to come a tipping point soon where people are just going to not stand for it anymore, and that sort of stuff is not great. Well, I mean, is it cruelty? I don't know.

They're literally trying to study the animals to see how they can improve their diets. But they've drilled a hole in their side and put a petrol cap on it. It seems, to the layman, it seems cruel. They've done that to some cows, but I mean, the rest of the cows, what's happening to them? They're getting a bolt through their head and then

you know, it's a McBurger, isn't it? It's all part of the same foul jamboree in my opinion. But anyway, episode one, Again, it's a bit rich as a meat eater. Yeah, I know, exactly. You're not allowed to get upset. No, but I'm saying that. I'm saying there is a problem.

I've got a cognitive dissonance and an issue with all this stuff. And a little willy. But I'm not, yeah, I'm not strong enough to give up meat or dairy. No. So, listen, answers on the postcard or hello at lukeandpeacher.com

if you want to give me any tips. Maybe it's too late for us. You reckon? maybe the generation below us will find it a lot easier because they've not eaten quite so much delicious meat

that will eventually kill us that's what you said about when you were denying climate change as well it's too late for me let me use my CFCs

episode 128 Pete 27th of December we are in that weird period between Christmas and New Year where the world feels like it's in stasis and literally nothing happens.

It's just weird TV specials, endless football, and leftover food and booze. Why do we always find it weird, though? Because, I mean, it happens literally every year. Why do people have a problem with it? I don't think the country has worked out how to deal with it.

What do you mean? Like, there's nothing to... Because it's the kind of... It's the decompression after the over indulgence on Christmas and you were sort of gearing up to New Year aren't we people work in that time

yeah but only dweebs only absolute nerds people have to go into the office on like the 27th or 28th I kind of feel sorry for them the type of people who

my friend and yours Michael Cox would say the type of people who because I've seen him write this will say oh I'm going to go into the office because there's no one around

and you can get loads done. Get a grip. Get a grip. Unless you're working on an emergency ward at a hospital, get a grip of yourself. I mean, we're going to record a couple of shows on the 28th, I think.

And you're going to talk sport as well, actually. So we've both mugged ourselves up. No, but I don't think necessarily, as you would always say, Pete. It's event listening, isn't it? Well, partly people make an appointment to listen to that show, Pete, and I simply cannot let them down. But secondly, as you are very fond of saying, it's not a real job, is it?

No, it's not. Just mucking about. Exactly, it's just messing around with your microphone. And I think the reason... In front of some inaccurate microphones. The reason that you are so frivolous with money, for example, that you've earned is because it didn't take any respect to earn it. Oh, Luke.

You enjoy your week, don't you? I enjoy it. I have a lovely time. Exactly. So what I'm saying is, it's not hard-earned money, is it? I'm sneaking into farms, fields, under the cover of night, drilling holes in cows.

Some people do cow tipping. I do cow ripping. You're like the countryside Elon Musk. I just want to make them more efficient. Put seven stomachs in them. Oh, drive a little car through the tunnel into their stomach. Alleviate congestion. congestion Luke I'm so annoyed

what's happened you know on occasion I can go from 0 to 60 in the Anger Stakes I was very much turbo powered

nitro powered in the Apple store yesterday oh how are you in there well I don't mind it people got to do their thing and you know

it's a little more friendly than a lot of other shops that I go in I brought my phone dropped it iPhone X I don't mind it. People got to do their thing. And, you know, it's a little more friendly than a lot of other shops that are going. I brought my phone, dropped it. iPhone X, you know, pricey bit of kit. Dropped it about two months ago. I sort of muddled along for about a month and a half with it. So about three weeks ago, I went into the Covent Garden Apple store and basically went,

look, can I get a new screen? I'll pay whatever. And it was 290 quid. Bloody hell. For a phone? For a phone. Well get you a new screen? I'll pay whatever. And it was 290 quid. Bloody hell. For a phone? For a phone. Well, for a new screen on a phone. Don't do one of those shops on West Northern High Street, mate.

It's no cheaper, because the screen actually costs quite a lot of money. Right. It's advanced. But I basically got an entirely new phone. They gave me an entirely new phone, because I also said the Bluetooth was a bit wonky as well, intermittent faults and all that. So they thought, you know what?

If he's paying that money, we'll give him a new phone. So I got a new phone and then I noticed about 10 minutes out of the shop, the top left-hand corner just wasn't kind of, it was kind of coming away a little bit. I was like, oh, that's going to get worse. And I paid 290 quid. So again, I muddled along for a couple of weeks and then went,

found a couple of hours in my day and popped into the Apple store in Regent Street. Now I go in and he goes, yeah, no worries. You know, we've replaced it. So we'll replace this one for free. Sorry for the inconvenience, Mr. Donaldson. Did you accept the apology? Yeah, fine. All good.

You know, it's not their fault. You know, these things sometimes happen. They're very intricate piece of machinery. I go away for two hours, come back. Right, Mr. Donaldson. Our engineers have taken a look at your phone and it appears that you have put a third-party screen on the iPhone, which the inference being that I've smashed it yet again

in the two weeks that I've had it and I've gone to one of those, I fixed it and got like a dodgy screen. Between you and I, it's just you and I here. Did you do that? No, I did not do that. Okay, right. No, I know by the inference, by the tone of your voice, I know you think I've done that. No, I just think, I know you were enough to know that sometimes, in fact, all the time, you can't resist interfering with stuff. Yeah, well, no, I just picked at it

like a scab and the whole thing came off. A week and a half ago, we were talking about you selling a microphone on eBay and in between selling it and shipping it, you took it to pieces. Yeah. yeah couldn't get it back together meticulously the pieces weren't damaged carry on

and so they said they this guy was it was really hard to be angry with him because he was incredibly incredibly diplomatic

in a difficult situation because he's basically saying look it's clear what's going on here you have smashed your phone again

and you've replaced it with a third party screen and I'm like going mate I fucking haven look, it's clear what's going on here. You have smashed your phone again and you've replaced it with a third-party screen. And I'm like going, mate, I fucking haven't. It's been two weeks. I'm so angry that you're even inferring that I've done that. But you have all the power here because your engineers have looked at it. You've seen, basically, their only clue that it was a third-party thing was a little yellow sticker that somebody had put in there

and a screw was loose. So I'm like, I can't vouch for your supply chain from Foxconn in, you know, Guangzhou or wherever the hell it is in China. I would pay £250 of my own money to see you incandescent with rage in an Apple store, a busy Apple store, saying, I can't vouch for your supply chain.

I can't vouch for your supply chain. I can't vouch for your supply chain. Check the statistics. Check the uptime on my phone. Has it been out of action between the hours of nine to five over 20 minutes? I don't think so, sir. And a screen text

going on that to replace. That's actually a good comeback. It's a pretty good comeback, isn't it? No, I didn't. You should have said that. No, that was when he got... You should have said that a bit later. Then when I'd professed my innocence,

he disappeared for another half an hour and came back and went, I've had another few engineers look at it. Turns out, I think our first engineer is just a bit of an idiot. Waste of your time, though. Waste of my time. Yeah.

And I was like... And I thought very diplomatically myself, said, I'm sorry if I raised my voice. Oh, you idiot. I didn't raise my voice. Double down, if anything. No, because I don't like it. I'm sorry if I sound a little

less than pleasant about it, but at the end of the day, you're accusing me of something that never took place. But then again, but the thing that annoyed me was I was off to the gym and I was dressed like a right old rotter.

Yeah, well, that's that kind of thing. I dress okay sometimes. It's not Apple Store's employees' fault that Apple products cost a lot of money. I completely agree with that. But it is their own fault that they're all quite pretentious, isn't it? Everything's pretentious. You go in any high street shop and it's a pretentious city, isn't it? And the sort of people that I feel so out of place in posh shops.

You go into like a posh frock shop and you buy your posh frocks. What are you doing there? Buying posh frocks. For who? Friends, family members. Who specifically? Me mam. You bought your mum a posh frock for Christmas.

A bar, a posh court. Did you? For some next. Okay, so that's not, so you've undermined yourself. But you can't honestly tell me, I know you live in a different world to the rest of us and I'm trying to get impatient about that. But you cannot tell me that when you walk into the Apple store, as I've done before, and said, got a new phone, the forward-facing camera's not working,

can you please look at it? Or I want to buy one of those little... Why do you want the forward-facing camera working, you perv? I'll tell you in a minute. I want one of those little adapters for headphones that cost, astonishingly somehow cost a tenner I just

what I want to do is I want to do like every other shop you can do go up to the shelf take it off the shelf take it to the counter that is

that is shopping as I as I imagine it as it should be again generational yeah but it doesn't matter

because the guy comes along with a little iPad and says, yeah, I'll probably fit you in for an appointment on Friday. I don't want an appointment on Friday. I'm fairly certain,

I think you probably muffed that up at the expectation of what you wanted. And I'll tell you something now. Why would he book you in a place to buy a little... My wife bought a brand new

iPhone recently and the forward-facing camera didn't work and she went in there on a lunch break to get it fixed and they couldn't fit her in for like two days. It's a joke.

It's an absolute joke. Who do they think they are? It's ridiculous. I'm going to get one of those phones I can't even say. Huawei. Huawei. Filled with Chinese naughty technology. Anyway, moving swiftly on.

No, I want to talk about motherboards. I want to talk about Chinese systems. They did this test on computers. So a computer is defined as a unit that can kind of solve problems and stuff. And a computer as we know it nowadays on a motherboard, there are about 50 computers on one board. So when you buy a PC, you're buying literally 50 PCs. It's incredible.

Every little bit, every little kind of chip on your motherboard or on your mobile phone can do a little bit of computing. So it could be its own little system. It's fascinating. Take a break. Hey, y'all, it's Mama Meemaw. And today I'm going to show you what I've been doing to take care of the pantry moth situation.

Peter, before we go into email. Pantry moths are easier to figure out, I think. Do you know, on every pantry moth, there's about 50 PCs. 50 PCs. Oh, there wasn't that Black Mirror episode. That was bees, I think. Oh, that's the only cultural touchstone I've got. No, I'm actually quite good on sci-fi.

Oh, isn't it spooky? I could talk sci-fi with you if you want to. All right, Aaron. What's your favourite sci-fi? Black Mirror. It doesn't involve a reflective service. Before we go into emails, I'm desperate to get this out of you

because I think it might be a bit of radio gold. On my computers. No. What are you normally doing between Christmas and New Year? Because you already said last time that you spent, and I thought it was a little bit sad, and you'd be happy to join the Moore family anytime you want. You spend quite a lot of Christmas day

flying solo because your dad goes to bed early and your mum's doing stuff. So what do you normally do in that bit between Christmas and New Year? Because I know that we're coming back to do shows on the 28th, but between that time,

usually what do you do? Because you're normally away. Well, the fact I have to come back for the 28th, I'm coming back for doing Rambo. But that's the first time in ages you've done that. Yeah, because I usually go away

for a while. Yeah, exactly. So what do you do between Christmas and New Year? Playing with your toys? A bit of Lego? To be honest, the last five years, I think I've been away. The last four years, I've sort of flown out on as soon as I could,

like the 28th or something. So I've stayed in Hartlepool for a few days and then sort of tried to get away. I think that was the time that we went to San Francisco and I forgot my passport oh yeah risky missed your flight

missed me flight didn't I so no it's been it's been basically just trying to get away so I don't actually this is the first Christmas I've spent in London

for about 10 years I think over Christmas right just pretty big big taters so it wasn't radio gold I was hoping for no sorry

I thought you hoped well in the new year maybe I'll tell you what I did. Yeah, that'll be better, I think, yeah. Should we do some emails, Peter? I've got one here that I'm desperate to read out from Keith. And he's not said I can't use his surname, but I'll just call him Keith. He says, on the continuing topic from a few shows ago

of schoolboy talent shows, when I was in fifth and sixth grade, which is 11 and 12, my school had a lip sync contest wherein students would choose a tune and do their best pantomime to go with the song. When you read the first paragraph of an email from a listener and you hear that as a first paragraph, you think, oh, this is going to be good.

I'm probably excited for this. Anyway, the first year I performed Queens, Another One Bites the Dust. Nice. Luckily, no pictures that I'm aware of exist as I was kitted out, listen to this. Anyway, the first year I performed Queens, another one bites the dust. Nice. Luckily, no pictures that I'm aware of exist as I was kitted out, listen to this Pete,

in a vinyl faux leather jacket, a pair of camp sunglasses that exploded as I tossed them on the ground. Wow. On the let's go. Mission impossible.

Which Freddie begins with his vocal contributions. My erratic performance including doing the splits. He's 11, this kid. Doing the splits and I was rewarded for my efforts with a most enthusiastic prize. A trio of my class...

That's like best improved, isn't it? Yeah. A trio of my classmates won that year with a well-choreographed suited take on Genesis' I Can't Dance. I can't believe that's going ahead of Freddie. Yeah, but you know for a fact that's right up the teacher's street because they would have been the judges, wouldn't they? Yeah, true.

Definitely. Anyway, Keith continues, the following year I attempted to hitch onto that success train the boy that led the Genesis choreography wanted to follow with an air band

version of Born in the USA for which I was to play Max Weinberg despite having never sat behind a kit or indicating at all that I possessed

anything resembling rhythm right needless to say I was kicked out of that band to solo again I performed a version

of the massive smash hit single Smells Like Team Spirit which involved me bursting out from a large cardboard box in a cabane outfit miming away on a toy

plastic electric guitar during the choruses and pummeling the ever loving shit out of the box with a guitar which refused to yield to the onslaught

during the choruses I did inspire some friends in the audience to join me in destroying the cardboard box that held me and walked away not with first prize but still with a certificate for the local video store,

which is not a bad result. That's magical. Keep up the good work. Best regards, Keith. Now, is that better or worse than your one-man bread performance? I was thinking when he was sort of saying smash up the thing, I remember getting some real giggles. It was like a drama class we had for about three months

when a floating drama teacher arrived in our primary school. And me and a friend, Ross Thompson, who once punched me in the face. Why? I can't remember. I probably deserved it. Were you wearing glasses then? Well, he went for the top of the head. What?

He was very conscientious. Big target. I hit him back. I had hair back then. So he hit you on the top of the head so you hit you on the top of the head hit me on the top of the head I can't remember why what a proper punch

or a thumb paw no it was my first proper punch I punched him back so it's alright it's all good we fucked I don't know

I don't know what we did was he the school bully kind of yeah he kind of grew into it but it got to 11 and then you're kind of not the school bully because you go to a different school

yeah you're the youngest again yeah exactly and then Petey goes to the good catholic school oh yeah oh yeah see you later suckers did you pass the exam

didn't need to do I love Jesus exam yeah I did my sister didn't I got in and I did a couple of years at Martyrs

and my sister couldn't get in oh dear because of my crimes but you had to pass an exam to go there. We had to pretend that I was banging a fucking God,

I tell you what. Oh, what I couldn't tell you about, I couldn't even figure out, on the little peach short, I just remembered a few weeks ago, I couldn't remember

whether he died on Easter. I mean, that was six months ago and you said to me, out of the blue, I wasn't expecting it, I'll be honest, how did Jesus Christ die?

Yeah. I mean, probably the most famous death ever. I can't think of a'll be honest how did Jesus Christ die yeah I mean probably the most famous death ever I can't think of a death that comes anywhere close in terms of notoriety

than that of Jesus of Nazareth the T500 shooting a GFK Terminator T1000 no T1000 oh T800

where he goes down to the thumbs up I mean that's a big leap T800 is like a mechanical item. Yeah.

And T-1000 is literally made of liquid metal. Yeah. What happened between those two iterations? It's Moore's Law over again, isn't it? When was...

How long was the beta? Is that a hundred... Presume that was 200 iterations I'd love to see T-900. Yeah? T-9... No, T-998. Still smokes a cigar.

Still... Still... He's like half mortal metal. Still steals motorbikes. But he's still a bit... I remember when I first saw that movie, two things. One, the special effects just blew my mind to pieces.

And I and my dad, me and my dad had a big bonding episode after watching that. Because I was about 14. I probably shouldn't be watching it. I was 18. And my dad just thinking it was amazing. And it is amazing.

And the second thing is just being absolutely terrified by the T-1000. Because the thing about it that makes it scary is not the fact that Robert Patrick is a good actor, which he is, particularly in that. But the idea they set out the premise, which was a more innocent time, right, back then. They set out the premise that whatever you do to stop this thing, it just keeps coming. And that's terrifying don't you think

yeah anything that's kind of uncontrollable and relentless like the passage of time that's not something we've got to look forward to when AI comes

and takes over the world but my fingernails are doing that at the moment a few minutes ago I feel like I might be a robot that just all it can do

is grow keratin a few minutes ago you were getting punched in the forehead by someone called Ross Thompson Ross Thompson and then you were going to talk the forehead by someone called Ross Thompson Ross Thompson and then you were

going to talk about he was alright actually I was friends with him oh yeah we did a bit of drama we did this off the cuff kind of improv you told us this and the guy didn't turn out

did he no no no this was different you talk about cubs see now you're doing improvised comedy talking about school they said do

in drama go into a room and do this do something and we did it and we got some real laughs and I was like

that was I think the first bit of performance to a crowd and I think if my life had gone another way maybe I could have been somebody successful

could have been successful I could have got that bug and sort of joined a theatre or something and been a bit of a bloody show off what? well you are that already

you just didn't join the theatre company I just remember sort of walking around I remember? A bit of a bloody show-off. What? Well, you are that already. You just didn't join the theatre company. I just remember sort of walking around. I remember I put my hand inside the VHS video and I lifted it up and all the kids laughed and the teacher told me to put it down. That's a good, easy room, that. What?

Putting your whole child's hand into a Betamax video recorder and then lifting it up and going... I mean, that's not groundbreaking. Yeah, but I remember the seed that was planted that

day. Yeah, I think so, yeah. It's grown, isn't it, to a big oak tree,

isn't it? At your school, because you're obviously a similar age to me, what year did you finish GCSEs,

97 or 98? 98, 98. Okay, right, so you're a year ahead, you'll be a

year behind me. When I was, the school I went to, the senior school I went to, talking about these, right. So you're a year ahead. You'll be a year behind me. When I was, the school I went to, the senior school I went to, talking about these talent competition things that you did at the end of each year, like Keith was talking about.

No, I started university in 98. No, you didn't. It's impossible. No, I did. Unless you were some sort of child prodigy, that's impossible. Right. I was born in 1981.

Yeah. So you're younger than me. Right. You would have started, the earliest you could have started university would have been 1999. All right, well, 1999 then. It's not 98, is it? I still didn't do my GCSE. I still didn't do my GCSE. on yeah so you're younger than me right you would have started the earliest you could have started university would have been 1999 alright well 1999

then but I still didn't do my GCSE I had A levels in between

didn't I you mad man so your maths are all over the place I did

GCSE 97 and A levels in 99 anyway we're getting away from

the point the point I was going to make which again I don't know what the point is yet

and it's quite boring so I don't know why I'm fucking dying on this particular hill but anyway

at the end of the year school talent competitions were at the school and I think probably all the schools around my area every single school there are schools

in your area five like an ad on an internet page five girls got together and did Spice Girls I like the first bit of that sentence

I'm telling you five girls got together and did Spice Girls did that not happen at your school? Yeah, everyone did Spice Girls. Exactly, exactly. Including the male teachers, he did like a drag version. There was a great culture of dads in social clubs at Christmas

or at Easter or Harvest Festival, any excuse to dress up, and in Hartlepool, black on, to do the Spice Girls. Any excuse, the dads of the town would do it because there's something inside us that we don't want, we pretend that isn't there, but we all would secretly want to be pretty girls on RuPaul's Drag Race.

Yeah, sashay away. Sashay away. Pete, and also, if you're asking me, did I join up with a lot of girls and do a beautiful rendition of Belinda Carlisle's Heaven is a Place on Earth at the end of my end of year thing, the answer is yes, indeed, I did. Good song, that. Absolutely did. Speaking of something you've mentioned there, which is a political hot potato for obvious reasons.

Why? This idea of blacking up. It's not really. It's kind of cut and dried in many ways. It's the potato that's been cut in half. Okay, what I mean is you've made a little stamp and you're stamping the Christmas trees for the Christmas cards.

You're saying wrong. You're saying nonsense. But the point being that people still do it which is absolutely outrageous but I was thinking about this the other day

and I happened upon a thing on the TV about Ben Kingsley. Oh, when he did Gandhi. Blacked up for Gandhi. Won an Oscar. Not that long ago. Not that long ago. Guy from Short Circuit did not win an Oscar. No, when he did Gandhi. Blacked up for Gandhi. Won an Oscar. Not that long ago. Not that long ago.

Guy from Short Circuit did not win an Oscar. No, but he still did it around the same time. He still browned So it's Hollywood

made a rod for its own back there. Sir Ben Kingsley won it. Arguably his most notable role. It's terrible, isn't It's really bad.

Isn't it? Tropic Thunder. Why is that? Why does everyone forget that? That was even more recent. That was even more recent. That was even more recent.

Yeah. To be honest, they love a dress-up in Hartlepool. I'll go home, and I've said it before, there'll be a Michael Jackson dressed up, and he'll be blacked up. You've got the choice there. Yeah. You can be white Michael Jackson.

It's funny how the world works, and suddenly all of a sudden everyone becomes, in quotes, woke about stuff. You can't do anything nowadays, they'll say. It's like you never could, mate. You know the Christianiano rape accusation? Yes. That broke before,

but no one picked up on it. And it broke again after the Harvey Weinstein and the Me Too thing. And it became massive. But did it not break because it was just either even more unsubstantiated

because the cogs started turning because of certain legal, you know, there was a legal case starting and also people don't want to touch it. the cogs started turning because of certain legal, you know, there was a legal case starting and also people don't want to touch that shit. Oh, right, so you think the case was a bit more advanced? It would have come out whatever.

I mean, footballers have been accused of rape like pretty much every year that, you know, the Premier League existed, for example, just because that's the way it should work,

to be honest. Right. All right, do you want to do another email? I can do an email Sophie Sophie hello Sophie Barnett hi Luke and Pete

I love your podcast so much I listen every day on my way to work it's a real treat every day impossible because it's only two a week she could re-listen I recommend re-listening

but delete it from your phone and then download it again definitely do that do that what's the re-listen value because I said the re-watch of TV programs is a huge factor in how much I like them because it shores up my love for them. So, for example, The Inbetweeners, as you know I love.

Yeah. That re-watch value is so high. You could put any episode of The Inbetweeners on now at any stage in the episode and I'll watch it. I'm assuming the American Office. I've started going through them again. I can see that, yeah. But the weird thing is,

Amazon has got a weird quirk in which some episodes of the earlier time, I don't know what it is, it's a refresh rate issue or whatever, I hate to get technical again, but they've sped up the episodes ever so slightly, so everyone's got a weirdly slightly higher voice. Why have they done that?

I have no idea. That's a strange thing to do. It must be just some kind of compression fuck-up. Is that a thing? No, I think it's just a compression fuck-up that someone's fucked up and no one's really noticed because no one's really that interested in, you know, season four, episode three of The Office.

And it's only a couple of seasons. I searched on Twitter for anyone else who'd noticed this and there's like me and two other people. And I actually tweeted one of them and went, yeah, what the hell is going on? I had to search Twitter and you were the only one talking about this. We started a club. This goes right to the top.

How long before one of you starts talking about blaming George Soros? Turn the guard or frog's gay. They're turning the office fast. Sophie Barnes says, hi, Luke Peed, love the podcast, etc. However, Luke, please, please, please stop reviewing films and then ruining the entire plot for us.

You recently talked about the exciting documentary Free Solo, which looks incredible, but then you went on to dissect the entire film in great detail. I know it's a documentary, which might not have a definitive cliffhanger ending, pun very much intended, as opposed to a feature film, but I feel like I've already seen the documentary

based on your very detailed description. Consider leaving out some of the more detailed parts. If anything, it's a compliment, isn't it? I've brought it to life to her to such an extent that she no longer feels like she has to watch it. Doesn't need to watch it. Just listen to the little Pete Shaw, load up the OS El Capitan on the operating system

and just look at the desktop background. I haven't got any room on my MacBook to download it, so I can't. El Capitan. I mean, I would say, Sophie, I appreciate your feedback. Pete and I do have sort of semi-serious discussions about spoilering of TV shows, and we decided on a sort of cut-off time, didn't we?

So, for example, The Sopranos, you can talk about what happens in that, because it's been like 15 years. But something like the current season of Game of Thrones, I wouldn't spoil it. I think, and I apologise if I've ruined your potential future enjoyment of Free Solo, but as far as I'm concerned,

the trailer does make it very clear what happens and how it happens. And it's really more about the experience and the shooting of it and the journey rather than specific individual parts within it. And I also have to say, I don't think I revealed any more information than any sort of proper film critic

would have done the ending to The Sopranos has Tony Soprano putting a dead mobster inside a cow yes

via the pothole and lowering it down on exactly the same lift that T-800 had in Terminator 2 and then he puts his little cow the cow does the thumb up

yeah with his hoof and then he goes and dies well how do you feel do you feel like I spoiled it for you I was never going to watch that film anyway He does the thumb up. Yeah, with his hoof. And then he goes... And dies. Well, how do you feel? Do you feel like I spoiled it for you? I was never going to watch that film anyway, to be honest. Say if you do, then. But just say if you do.

I can't remember what you... I mean, you said that he was still alive, so... I mean, that's the sort of thing that you might not know. Everyone knows he's still alive. Everyone says, oh, he's on everyone's lips. Can I just say, it made international news, and he was interviewed on more than one occasion about it. Yeah, by Dweebersides.

By Dweebersides, I'm afraid. By Dweebs, yeah. You are a Dweeb, but just in a different area. Yeah, exactly. I'm Tech Dweeb. You're Rock Dweeb. Space Dweeb. Which was one of the...

Boring. I want to see humans creating shit. Do you remember Rock Lords? Yes, I do, yeah. I think one of them was called Rock Dweeb. One of the... there's a film out at the moment with um ryan gosling and he plays neil armstrong i do believe oh it's called first man moon man first man yeah first man that's man my granddad went to the cinema and

watched that so it was excellent he said he did why is he bringing a granddad he goes to the cinema all the time all right like he like he sort of went oh yeah but you said that as if he was a man watching the colourisation of the World War 1 footage oh yeah that was so accurate

don't yeah I'll never be in the film grandad stop talking shit don't talk about a film some of you might get upset well the whole peril is

that oh they're running out of gas they might not get to the planet moon planet or they might not get. They might not get to the planet moon. The planet, yeah.

Or they might not get to Earth. That's what I meant by the planet. But obviously, all that peril's gone because you all know that Neil Armstrong survived and lived to an older age. Exactly. That's the thing, isn't it, right? Have you heard... Speaking of that, speaking of planets, did you see this Steve Malloy guy

who's got this ridiculous climate change denial? Right. And he is a... I mean, he's a ludicrous individual and he tweeted um this the other day saying um defazio he's quoting someone else called defazio uh on climate change he says this is the existential threat to the future of the planet this is insanity for comparison the atmosphere on venus is 96.5 co2 and the planet is still is insanity. For comparison, the atmosphere on Venus is 96.5% CO2 and the planet is still there. In contrast, Earth's atmosphere

is only 0.04% CO2. Well, they're flourishing out there, aren't they? It's not really life as we know it on Venus, though, is it? Give them a ring, Steve. Yeah.

Pop over to Venus, see how they're getting on in their 900 degree Celsius temperatures and noxious clouds of gases all over the fucking planet. Right, this is his little thing. He looks like, there's a young boy on YouTube who's about, I don't know, 16 or something.

The guy about the Office episodes being sped up. And he's posh. And he wears a little blazer. And he basically reviews things like McRib. Okay, right. He's an adorable little chap. Not Peng Life? No, no, no.

Well, he's basically white, Peng Life. And he kind of combs his hair back and he puts a blazer on and he sort of reviews quite gauche food and sort of talks about good manners and stuff. That sounds quite good. He looks like Kevin McAllister from Home Alone. Steve Malloy looks like him,

but his actual Twitter bio, I'm just looking, co-founder of burnmorecall.com. I saw that, yeah. Trump EPA transition team. Eagle Scout. Why do Americans do that? Eagle Scout.

Who gives a shit? Who gives a shit about burnmorecoal.com? Burnmorecoal.com. I want to see that. I want to click on this. Can I just say, I was in the Scouts and I bloody loved it.

It looks like a Myspace page. I wouldn't put it on my bio of my Twitter, but I loved being a Scout. No. It was great. Weren't you a Scout? You were a Cub, weren't you? I was a Cub.

I didn't go to Scouts because they played too much football and I didn't like football back then. I'm going to donate to his cause, burnmorecoal.com. If you donate... Send some coal. If you donate at least $50, you get a Burn More Coal coffee mug. It makes a great stocking stuffer. I'll tell you what, I'd get one of those in the office. To put next to the fire.

It'd be funny. Yeah, beautiful. There's nothing wrong with being an Eagle Scout, Peter. Or a climate change denier. It's a very noble thing, I think. I love the ideas about being an outdoorsman. It's probably because I'm not one. President Trump loves beautiful, clean call.

Stop talking about Trump. That's what it says, that was one of the quotes. Let's get out of here. Let's do it. Let's burn more call. We'll. That was one of the quotes. Let's get out of here. Let's do it. Let's burn more coal. We'll be back on New Year's Eve, and we're probably going to sum up how 2018's been for both of us, Pete.

Oh, no. Both separately and together, so stick around for that. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com to get in touch. We'd bloody love to hear from you, and we hope you're having a lovely Merry Christmas. I've found seven lumps.