The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 131: A broad parish

Episode Date: January 7, 2019

Welcome to your all new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, indeed the second issue of 2019. We're celebrating the new year by discussing Limewire, Morpheus and Kazaa (the only way of grabbing the music you wanted for free back in 2002), a couple of films we've seen, and a 70-year-old Japanese skateboarder. Obviously.After that there's plenty of stories from you too, and we thank you for your continued dedication to the podcast about absolutely nothing at all. It's such fun to make for you. We'd love to hear from you: [e-mail]***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How you doing? Happy New Year. Not really. We've already done one episode in the new year. This is the Luke and Pete show. I'm the Pete bit of the Luke and Pete show. And that man over there... Is everything else. Everything else and a whole lot more. Hello, everyone. Very nice to talk to you again. You're very welcome. Don't make it sound too much like a chore. It's not a chore, really. Very welcome to speak to you again. For God's sake.

Sorry. I suppose you've lent us your ears again. No, I'm very happy to be here, but I was just going to say, Pete, we did a show on the 3rd, obviously, which was the first of the new year, but we might find that people are now

making new years resolutions to listen to podcasts so we might have some new listeners this week maybe people got some new mobile phones

exactly or an iPod and so this is the show about nothing in particular with myself Luke and Mr Pete over there Mr P Mr PD

I think Mr Pete might have been a porn star in the 90s seem to recall that from Kazar or LimeWire. Evidently possible. Did you use

Morpheus as well? Morpheus. Yeah, that was a derivative. I used Morpheus and LimeWire. I never really used Kazar.

No. People of a certain age, like our social media guy Charlie out there, won't ever remember what it's like to set up your

computer to download, I don't know, say, the President of the United States version of Video Killed the Radio Star, for example. Linkin Park, numb. Yeah, wait an hour for it to download. And it's an executable file.

Yeah. And you're like, I can't use that. That's filled with viruses and malware. No use to me, that. No use to me. And, yeah, so, I mean, maybe we're the podcast equivalent of that. You download it thinking you're going to get something and you end up with something completely different.

We should start launching ourselves. I've always said that some of our projects and products, we should start a little site on the dark web just because we'd be the first podcasters to sort of say, we're on the dark web. You say this quite a lot. While you're buying shotguns and stuff and drugs. You say this quite a lot.

And I always say to you the same thing, I don't really know how to do that. Yeah. Or what it even is. I don't either, so I'm hoping you did. It's part of your brand, that is. What?

To get on the dark. I know the dark, I've been there, but I don't know how to set things up on there. Is it like Skull Island on Link Breath of the Wild? Zelda Breath of the Wild? Stop talking about Zelda Breath of the Wild. No, I love it.

Find another video game to talk about I was going to recommend you one actually Minute it's basically it's a little bit like do you remember the old

Dizzy games we spoke about them a few weeks ago a little bit like Dizzy but basically it resets every 60 seconds there's a countdown 60 seconds

and you have 60 seconds to run around and do as many tasks as you can to further the story and then you've got and then you die every 60 seconds and then you get put back in your house and you wake up is to run around and do as many tasks as you can to further the story. And then you die every 60 seconds and then you get put back in your house and you wake up and you do the same thing.

It sounds like me on Zelda. I die every 60 seconds. Exactly, yeah. And you go back to an old save game. So yeah, it's a fascinating little... It sounds like an interesting concept. Yeah, it's really beautifully done. Like really sort of low-res two-colour graphics.

It's just, yeah, it's a beautiful piece. It's a beautiful piece of work. One of my games of the res um two color graphics um it's just yeah it's it's a beautiful piece it's a beautiful piece of work one of my games of the year and i only started playing it the day before uh the end of 2018 and now we're a week into the 2019 i mean is it living up to expectations for you are you happy with the way you are with it does anything feel different um i've got a terrible cough because a little baby M over Christmas gave everyone in the house a cold. But the problem with the asthmatics is always ends up on the chest. Always ends up on the chest.

I'm incredibly wheezy. So apologies for that, everyone. Oh, it doesn't matter. Yeah. We love you as you are, man. The Luke and Pete show community is, is broad. It's a broad church. Community.

I'm trying, listen, I'm trying to, I'm trying to foster a community here. You know, I've been calling it in Kazakhstan I talk about quite a lot? The door to hell. Uzbekistan. The door to hell. With a podcast equivalent of that. It's a broad church, Pete, and they're very accepting people. Unless you spoil plots for films.

You get in big trouble. Somebody started recommending me that El Capitan climbing man film. Free solo. Mate, I'm already across it. I know exactly what happens. And then he gets a girlfriend. Blah, blah, blah. Have you seen it free solo mate I'm already across it I know exactly what happens and then he gets a girlfriend nah blah blah have you seen it

no I haven't seen it that's not exactly what happens for every for every email we got criticising me about spoiling that movie we got 0.1

saying how much they enjoyed my review of it you watched a film last night I did actually I've seen two films since I last saw you okay give us

how many Lukey fingers out of five okay so first of all I'll very quickly go through I don't want this to turn into like a film review show no but just give us a five out of five thing

I watched The Favourite with Olivia Carman Rachel Weisz and the lovely Emma Stone directed by the guy whose name I can't remember but also directed The Lobster

which is apparently very good I've not seen that I thought it was excellent The Favourite I thought it was really idiosyncratic very well acted Stone, directed by the guy whose name I can't remember, but also directed The Lobster, which is apparently very good. Yes. I've not seen that. I thought it was excellent, The Favourite. I thought it was really idiosyncratic, very well acted. I got told by a mate that people were sort of going and thinking it was going to be like an Oscar-baiting kind of period drama sort of thing, and came out going, what the fuck was that? Yeah, it's sort of, it's completely subversive.

I mean, The Lobster's mad. Yeah, I haven't seen it, but I saw people describe The Favourite as a period drama crossed with Airplane yeah that's fair play yeah I mean it's not

it's not as funny as Airplane but that's fair enough right but it is very good it's very well acted and it does subvert that whole thing

and as a result ironically it'll probably win a lot of Oscars but it's good but anyway the film that I was really and I'm not not comparing the two

and I'm not saying one is better than the other because they're very different for different reasons but one movie I watched which I found very interesting actually a lot of people

have been talking about it and that inspired me to watch it is the documentary film about the reformation of Bross yes have you seen it?

no well I think I've seen it's one of those things like the colourisation of the World War 1 footage by that dude. Yeah, Peter Jackson. Peter Jackson and stuff like that.

It's one of those kind of things that everybody watches. So every bit of enjoyment I could have possibly got out of that film, I've experienced in GIF form on the internet. Oh, I see what you mean. So it's kind of like, I know all of the references. I know all of the weird things that the brothers say. They're both quite aloof, aren't they, and strange. Well, I found it... So people will say...

I spoke to someone about it fairly recently, who I won't name, who's a bit older than us, and said, oh, I know one of the Goss brothers, and that's the reason I won't be watching this film. Intimate, and he's a complete dickhead. Right. But a lot of people said to me, you've got to watch it

because they come across as like, one of them's like David Brent, the other one's, you know, he's embarrassing, they're dickheads and stuff. And almost like a sideshow, it's like voyeuristic reason for watching it. So obviously I'm not above that.

So I thought, right, I'll get stuck in then. And obviously Mimi doesn't really know much about Bross because she grew up in America, so I had to explain who they were. But of course the film does a reasonable job of doing that anyway. But curiously, and I'd be interested to hear

from people who've seen it, obviously hello at lukeandpetecher.com to find out if you agree, but I actually come away thinking they're massive products of their environment, right? So if you look, one thing that goes underplayed, I think, because you never hear their songs on the radio now, they've already talked about

how colossally big they were at the time and they were young men and they sort of got the usual story sort of got chewed up by the record industry and spat out

and they're now doing very well for themselves so Luke Goss acts in movies and he does okay and they both live in LA and Vegas

respectively because Matt Goss is a very established and successful Las Vegas entertainer he's done over 2000 shows at Vegas, obviously made a lot of money,

and they've done well. Matt Goss particularly is in the best nick of any 50-year-old man I've ever seen as well. So anyway, there's more to it than that. I came away from the movie thinking they are massive products of their environment, of their upbringing, and that's what people are, right?

So it's too simplistic and it's too reductionist to say, that guy there, Bellend. Life is about more than that. And I don't think there's any chance that two twins... You're pointing at yourself, but you... I'm saying explain this.

I can't explain that. And that's part of the reason of this show. That's the premise of this show. But the thing is very... This is a Bross documentary, just me and you. I don't want to bore on about it, but there are two twin lads from peckham who had nothing growing up and they've now got everything and they've had a lot of ups and downs along the way a lot of

emotional stuff and and some of it fair enough is stuff that everyone goes through the losing of family members the the failure and success all that kind of stuff but but but i came away from it feeling it actually thinking it was had a lot more to it than just let's go put these two out of touch

complete weirdos I thought it had a lot more to it than that it was the dynamic between the competition between twin brothers and the alpha male dominance that kind of stuff

lot of interesting stuff to hang your hat on there so it is well worth checking out well speaking about twin brothers I was sort of listening

I've been listening to a podcast that the Australian put together The Teacher's Pet I've heard lots of things about that I mean it's

slow going it's basically about the murder of a woman I'm about six episodes in or something and basically this woman went missing and it was all due to

these two twins and the bloke who actually went out with married the woman he was sleeping with one of his students at school, he was a school teacher in a rugby league, hero etc etc and

the twin dynamic is a fascinating fascinating study another film that I, one film that I watched four hands out of five hands. I'd give Bross like four and a hands out of five hands I'd give Bross like four and a half out of five I thought it was

fascinating Bad Times at the El Royale great ensemble cast Jeff Bridges Dakota Johnson John Hamm

there's some great Chris Hemsworth's in there as well if you were John Hamm would you change your name no John Hamm

that's alright it is a bit flat in it and I guess he sort of found fame later in life. Cynthia Erivo is from Stockwell. She's a Tony Award winning actor, and she is fantastic in that film. I saw some posters for it on the tube

at Highbury and Easton Station. I thought it looked pretty interesting. Yeah, it's interesting. It's not like, oh my days, you have to watch this film, but it's just all about a hotel. What inspired you to go and watch it then? I watched it illegally on the internet.

I've just become a member of my local cinema. There's a new cinema built in my area. In my area? Yeah. Hot cinemas in my area? Hot singles in my area. Did you see a little animated gif for it on a website? Yeah.

Are all your references related to porn sites? Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. All hot cinemas in my area. Do you want to meet them? Click here. Cost me 100 quid, so it's just about the same thing.

So that's what we've been up to, I guess. Hello at Luke and Peach, make sure to get involved if you saw any good movies over Christmas. Or indeed, if you want to talk to us more about the twin dynamic. Maybe you are a twin.

Yeah. Have you been in a movie? My best friend is a twin. Right. And his twin sister I'm very good friends with as well, and they are comically similar. So I spend a lot of time with my best friend, of course,

but I don't see his twin sister as often. I tend to see her quite a lot over Christmas, and I saw her on Christmas Eve for a period of time when my friend, her twin brother, wasn't there. And it's almost like having a female version of him in the room. They're so similar. It's very interesting.

It was one of our first dates over Christmas, and I only saw bits of it, but they're fucking. Oh, but Peter. What? You're going to have to qualify that. They're not. They're not. Yeah.

But it's just a bit Jedward-y. It's just the closeness. It's the Jedward effect. There were a couple of twins. They always come in twos. There were a couple of twins they always come in twos there were a couple of twins on Pop Idol or X Factor or whatever it was

before Jedwood called Same Difference from Corsair and they were quite odd what? I'm just saying what are we talking about in terms of New Year's resolutions?

stop relating everything back to porn and stop relating everything back to incest porn porn we said look I'm not getting into it,

but I'm just saying that the closeness of twins always seems a bit eerie to me. If you were a twin and you're having an incestous relationship with your twin, let's go. Why haven't we got

a broader listenership, Pete? That's what I want to know. It's baffling. I know. Right, let's do some emails next. That's nice. Not used that for a while. Short and sweet, that. Luke, because it was like Luke at me that's nice not used that for a while short and sweet that

Luke because it was like Luke at me see what I did there you could have put Luke over the top that would have been too far

well Luke I mean it's practically the word it wouldn't be that much difference would it Luke at me do you think our listeners

I mean you are scared of success Pete you are scared of acknowledging great great I don't think it's. You are scared of acknowledging greatness. Just pardon me, mate. I don't think it's that.

You're scared of acknowledging greatness in yourself and others around you. Do you think, joking aside, our podcast community here is one of the finest around? I think so, yeah. Yeah, I agree. Well, just looking at the... The contributions. Just look at the contributions. Once you get past the spam emails, fuck it.

Just fuck. If you can... One New Year's resolution, just don't do it. Yeah. Because it makes me sad. And also, one thing we didn't consider

when people started spamming us, signing us up to stuff, is that the good people at the EU give you options to unsubscribe from everything instantly, so it's fine. Right. Outside the EU,

you're in big trouble. In America, which is like the Wild West, you can't unsubscribe from everything instantly so it's fine. Right. Outside the EU you're in big trouble. In America which is like the Wild West you can't unsubscribe from anything. We've been invited to so many New Orleans New Year's Eve parties.

Yeah. I've been invited to so many like free stays if I buy 10 nights at the Hyatt in the Midwest. Nice.

Yeah. Well you have as well. We came to both of us. And before we get into emails proper many thanks for all the people who've emailed in about trying to live a more ethical lifestyle very much appreciated yeah there's a lot of vegan uh vegan chat on the i didn't know so many vegans listen to us it's 28 20 it's 2019 yeah i mean it's gonna happen isn't it the everyone's getting

their uh panties in a twist about the old Greg's vegan sausage roll. What is that all about? I saw something about that earlier. Basically, Greg's have released a vegan sausage roll and like a dog whistle to the psychotic members of the Twitterati, such as, is that Tit? Not Top Gear.

May as well be Top Gear, man. I don't know who you mean. He's on Good Morning Britain. Oh, Piers Morgan, yeah. He's like, well,

you made a vegan, you PC, it's like, it's not replacing the normal sausage roll, Piers, just giving vegans an option. So,

don't worry about it. But great is this beautiful reply that just said, oh, hello, Piers, we've been expecting you. Yeah,

okay. I've got an assessment of Piers Morgan that I'd like to share. Okay. I won't take too long because already too much has talked about him. My assessment of Piers Morgan,

I don't know him, never met him, don't know anyone who knows him, but he is, I'm going to preface this by saying he is successful, he is wealthy, he is, you know,

for whatever means he's done it, he's done it, but he's unhappy. And the means he's done it he's done it uh but he's unhappy and the reason he's unhappy is because and and this is this chiefly comes from a football background because obviously we do football broadcasting as well he just wants to be accepted as a football fan and no one will accept him so basically if you think about it he's on the record as being a big arsenal fan but arsenal fans are thoroughly ashamed of him and Arsenal players

post past and present just think he's a complete penis because he is and the one thing he craves more than anything else look at the way he sucks up to Trump look at the way

he banters in quotes with like Alan Sugar he just wants to be accepted and he's never really fully been accepted or feel like he's been accepted so my advice to everyone listening

if they care is don't accept him because that's what you want. Well, I don't even think it's even that. He's seen people like Milo Yiannopoulos, who's obviously lost all of his money thanks to him being a dreadful human being, etc. And these right-wing commentators in America. And he's seen how much money you can make as those kind of people. And he's adopted this persona of this reactionary, psychotic maniac who's just scared and worried about the future of humanity

and the future of the male condition. He's not making quite as much money as he could do doing that. And so he's kind of frantically trying to find a bit of a niche for himself. I don't know if I fully agree with that, but I don't think there's as much opportunity to make money as that type of character in the UK. Yeah, exactly. You can't be a right-wing race-betting maniac like you can over there.

You can make a lot more money out there. Yeah, and in the UK, it tends to be people who are successful at it, but then have to crowdfund, like Tommy Robinson, or people who are wealthy anyway, like Nigel Farage. Yeah.

And so Nigel Farage will say, oh, in the Daily Mail or whatever, where he'll just lap it up, he'll say, oh, I'm destitute. I've invested all my money in Brexit, which is absolute nonsense. He's so wealthy. He's part of the mainstream establishment, as we all know. I think he might even be, there's been some, because I live right near Dulwich College, not in the posh bit.

I live in West Norwood. And he's a Dulwich College alumnus and there was some controversy recently because I think he might have just been given some sort of

honorary title it's something weird like you know because Dulwich College has been around since like the 17th century and there's loads of other stuff

that goes on I think he's been given the captaincy of the historic old boys cricket team or something like that and people are saying should he really be

should he really be doing that should they really be sort of encouraging that kind of stuff and one of the historic old boys cricket team or something like that. Right. And people are saying, should he really be doing that? Should they really be sort of encouraging that kind of stuff? And one of the things that he doesn't like being known is that he- As part of the establishment. Oh, yeah, of course. But as a child, he was a bit of a,

it won't be a surprise to know, is that he was a bit of a shit as a kid at Dulwich College. I won't go into it for legal reasons but basically if you look up Nigel Farage and what he got up to at school it won't be a surprise to you but it might

be, you might find it quite interesting. Anyway I don't know how we've promised emails and started talking about Piers Morgan and Nigel Farage but there you go. So have you tried a vegan sausage roll Pete? No I haven't actually actually we should taste test it for next week I'm trying to eat healthily but I'll dip a toe

in the vegan waters one thing that will surprise you and the listeners and I promise this is true I don't remember ever being in a Greggs I don't eat a lot of Greggs to be honest

even though I'm from the North East there's more Greggs in Newcastle than there are McDonald's wow there's a 24 hour one in Newcastle I remember are McDonald's. Wow, there's a 24-hour one in Newcastle. I remember walking past it. There's some city-down ones.

You can have a little city-down. Nice, there's an institution up there. Anyway, emails. What do you want to do, Pete? Do you want to do something on... Should we just do something very quickly on climbing documentaries? Yeah, let's do that. This is from David Odie.

He says, in listening to Luke's rousing review of Free Solo, see Sophie? David liked it. Not that, in listening to Luke's rousing review of Free Solo, see Sophie? David liked it. Not that I bear a grudge. About the first ascent of El Capitan, another documentary about climbing sprang to mind

where I first heard of Alex Honnold. For disclosure, I would consider myself a fan in any way of, or I think he means to say I wouldn't consider myself a fan in any way of climbing.

However, the documentary Valley Uprising is one of the best documentaries I've seen. I'm more of a fan of getting down off things. Same. I'm more of a fan of getting down off things. I'm more of a fan of that relaxing feeling when you're back on terra firma.

Yeah, I'm very much like him, but in reverse. The people who really love flying, even still when they put their foot down on terra firma, go, ah. Oh, do you reckon? Oh, look, I prefer more. Yeah, people who really love flying would be like, oh, I wish I was still up there. I do like flying, but I can relax properly when the seatbelt starts to come off. Right.

I'm just one of those. You can tell when I've recently booked a holiday because my whole of my YouTube suggestions will be just men who do reviews of economy class in some weird off-brand kind of subsidiary. It's a good job if kind of subsidiary of Singapore Airlines and stuff. Yeah, but all they do is fly around for business

and they just review their... No, because there was a guy I saw a documentary about the opening or the unveiling of the new A380 that big double-decker Airbus. Right. Double-decker Airbus? Double-decker Airbus, mother. It was on the BBC I think.

And they had a guy there whose job was a YouTuber reviewing flights, reviewing cabins and stuff. And they let him go on a free flight in the first class there to review it. So there are people who've got jobs there.

Anyway, back to Valley Uprising. Influencers, man. Half of them are fake. One of the best documentaries that David's seen. It's centered around the emergence of the climbing culture in the Yosemite National Park in the 60s and 70s.

Little did I know beforehand how climbing stood within the counterculture movement of that era. The documentary is really well made with great scenery and footage. In line with this is another great documentary about a sport I like to watch on occasion. It's called Fire in Babylon about the great West Indian cricket team. I've seen that. It's fantastic.

The West Indian cricket team in the 70s and the 80s and the counterculture and what that symbolised rather than just sport you know the story of fighting racism and colonialism through sport

that kind of stuff I've not seen Valley Uprising David but I will watch it and I think Pete you should do the same I think it's on Netflix it's definitely available online

at least being a cricketer people can actually watch you I mean if you've got to talk about counterculture I'd probably be more likely to get into skateboarding or cricket rather than um climbing because nobody can really see you do that you're just a little dot climbing up a big mountain can you really see yourself getting into um getting into skateboarding

there was a gentleman who may or may not have been a member of the band jesus jones that i used to know uh who was probably around about my age and used to skateboard into work. And I used to think, come on, come on, come on, fuck your ideas. You may have played on the seminal International Bright Young Thing, but there's a limit. There's a limit. But then if you go a little bit older, like when I was in Japan last, I saw in a place called America Mica mura which is america town um in osaka there was a man who must have been about 70 who was a pretty decent skateboarder and

he was a bit of um a bit of local color so kids would have t-shirts with his face on and he was an old japanese chap who would just skateboard around the gaff was ancient is japan still the the country with the highest life expectancy? Yeah, so he could have been skateboarding for another 30 years. In my mind, everyone lives to about 120 years ago in Japan.

So certainly isn't that old. Hey, check this out. Sam in Prague. This comes from Christmas time, mistletoe and wine, but it's worth checking out

some of the things that happen in other parts of the world. Also known as Christmas time Michael Heseltine. Yes. Yeah. I miss that guy's hair.

I imagine he does as well. Tarzan. His nickname's Tarzan. Why? Because of his wild hair? Yeah. Oh, we lost Paddy Pansdown. I know.

On Christmas. Yeah, that was a real shame, actually. We've lost Paddy Pansdown. Can you use his real name? The man has died. Sir Paddy Ashdown. All right, you don't have to add Sir. Sir Patrick Ashdown.

He was apparently a bit of a spank, as the Aussies might say. He wasn't a knight, sadly, was he? I don't think he was, anyway. Probably wouldn't have accepted it because he was such a rebel. The thing is, I remember, this is going to hugely debase Paddy Ashdown. Us and Paddy Ashdown's contribution to the public life. Can we debase ourselves much further? I remember having a debate with my mum over Christmas

about whether Paddy Ashdown was a knight or not. So I opened up Google and typed him Sir Paddy. And the first thing that came up, Sir Paddy McGuinness. Hang on. As in, people are looking for Sir Paddy mcginnis wow that's good isn't it that's bad that is bad that is sad indictment that is poor that is no 90 no likey good god um sam in prague has got in touch uh remote batteries alcalisk who apparently allied with ikea have you heard of alcalisk before? Have you heard of Alkalisk?

It's kind of like Obelisk and Alkaline at the same time. I've been humming and harring on whether to write to you for a long time now. However, nothing in my story funnel quite landed in the Luke and Pete area of storytelling. You'd be surprised. You'd be surprised, Sam. I've been with my Czech fiancée coming up five years now. And during that time, I have had the great fortune to experience a wide array of traditions and festivities to start. And an obvious point, Christmas here takes place in traditional European fashion, being celebrated on the 24th of December.

And in place of our standard roast turkey and ham, we have grilled carp served in a humongous helping of eggy and mayonnaise-y potato salad. I'm trying to back off the mic a little bit because I'm a little bit squeaky, so apologies for that. So grilled carp with potato salad. I don't mind that. Obviously, it's what you've grown up with, but I'm not sure I'd like that for Christmas dinner, but it sounds like a decent meal.

It's more just the preparation. I mean, we've all heard of the Polish and the Czech. They have bathtubs all around the Czech Republic being filled up and hosting a live carp before its impending demise. The days leading up to Christmas, everyone gets their live carp and they let it swim around for a bit.

Anyway, moving on to one of my favourite editions of the year, the annual Easter whipping event of a village woman. Oh, for goodness sake. Sorry, of a village's woman. Women. Villages' women. Lots of them. So it's woman, women. Villages' women, lots of them. So it's fine.

Strength. Strength and unity. This in Czech is known as pomlasku, I think you pronounce it like that, or pomlasku, maybe. This tradition includes large groups of men and boys as young as five plaiting themselves a whip or pomlaska, made of bound pussy with little sticks, and subsequently visiting the houses of all the women in the village.

Said women must present their posteriors ready to be whipped, whilst the men will sing a special song for the occasion. This sounds like the sort of thing that Dwight Schrute comes up with in the American office, quite frankly. And I've not even seen it. The men will sing a special song for the occasion, Hody, Hody, Dopra Vody. This song. And I've not even seen it. The men will sing a special song for the occasion, Hordi Hordi Dopra Vordi. This song has no set pace, rhythm or beat.

You sound like the Swedish chef and the Muppets. This results in a multitude of different styles being uttered and allowing everybody on this day to be an artist. The reason for whipping all of the village's women, as my good friend so perfectly described it to me, they do this to keep a woman young and to stop her from drying out. I don't... None of this makes

any sense. You then receive a homemade snack for your efforts, maybe an open face sandwich or a chicken schnitzel and a shot of homemade plum schnapps, never less than 50%. As you can imagine, this is great fun by the fifth house, we can take it to all as you move on to the 15th or the 20th. All in all, you get filled with homemade booze and snacks

for effectively being a singing tyrant with a whip. I would argue that there is no place better to be a man. I mean, that's a bad way to end that story, Sam, but thank you for that. Yeah, that is a horrendous way to end the story for Sam, but interesting nonetheless. Again, product of his own environment there. He's been fiancé'd to a Czech woman for five years. Is it nature or nurture? One thing I was put

into mind, and I'm possibly about to embarrass myself here, I hope not. You know I love the in-betweeners, right? This has got relevance, bear with me.

There was a show that a couple of them were given, which they wrote with a guy called Johnny Sweet, who's a really funny comedy actor as well. He's got a cameo in

the in-betweeners, but anyway, called Chickens. Have I talked about it on this show before? No. It's basically, the premise is a really strong one. really funny comedy actor as well uh he's got a cameo in the in-betweens but anyway called chickens have i talked about on the show before no it's basically the premise is a really strong one it's three guys in a small village during the first world war yeah who can't join the army for a range of reasons and therefore the only men left in the village and all the women automatically hate them right yeah it's interesting it's funny anyway one of them's a conscientious objector and he doesn't even want to whip or corporal punishment deliver to a child in the school because he's a teacher yeah and um just really reminded me of it because when he finally

gets persuaded to do it he just goes mental and everything goes wrong and he just goes so he gets so into it that he ends up just crippling the kid. Oh no. And I hope no one does that in that blooming Czech village. Well, as long as they're shouting hodi hodi do pravodi.

What does that mean? We're fine. I don't know. Let's translate that, Pete. Let's, well, type it into Google. Get the Google Translate going on because we want to know because if it's something horrific,

we should probably bleep it out. Let's have a look. Surely it's all done in good jest. All my emails at the moment, I'm selling a camera and all I get are just absolute camera nerds. Have you taken it apart? No, I haven't.

It just drives me absolutely mad. There's people going, is there dust in the lens? At TalkSport Peak, there's a microphone that's been hanging around. And what does it mean? Hody Hody Doprovody

apparently means feast feast of water that's all right that's all right at Talk Sport there's a microphone lying around it's been there for ages

it's on a desk old handheld mic right and you can unscrew it and pull it down and every time I do that I think of you and I actually got a video of it I'll show you it later so you can and um you can unscrew it and pull it down and every time i do that i think of you and i actually got a video of it i'll show you it later so you can see what

you think about it well you can unscrew it what you unscrew it and it's um it's got like you can see the inner work no you can see all the inner workings of it well don't screw it you know it's not being used but i just i'm doing it out of my passionate friendship for you um right is there anything else you want to talk about pete today or shall we should we get out of here let's get out of here because okay I've got a good email about free money but I think I'll talk about it

next time and free money is the great late Tom Green where'd that come from Tom Petty and no one says great late they say late great

I know that's why it's an interesting quirk of language Emerson late great great Palmer it's an interesting quirk of language because

I saw someone talk about this a while back. So you would say the big pink dragon, but you couldn't say. The pink big dragon. No. It's a weird unwritten rule of English language, isn't it?

Yeah. So the wide yellow door, you wouldn't say the yellow wide door. Yellow wide door. It sounds weird. It sounds like it's been mistranslated. If you're learning and if you're learning English that would be

odd right yeah you'd struggle with that there's no reason for it yeah there we go there's no reason

for it I hate the English language it's inflexibility I think regular listeners to the show will be well aware of that

I abuse it hello at lucanpeach.com to get in touch with anything you want to talk about whether you've heard it today or not

thank you for your continued listenership and support what are you doing? well we're starting to try and streamline the system here I didn't realise when you switch screens

it actually cancels what you've actually played out a lesson learned live let's have another go at that a lesson learned live thank you very much for being with us

hello at lukeandpeteshow.com we'll see you next time around and we hope to hear from you soon lots of love suck it this was a Radio Stakhanov production.