The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 138: Sticking your foot in it

Episode Date: January 31, 2019

The weekend is rapidly approaching and what better way to get ready for it than to listen to today's Luke and Pete Show, which features plenty of chat about Pete's bathroom, his fascination with vaping, and the great Wes Welker delivering one of the all-time great interviews.In addition to all of this, we just about tie up all the remaining woodlice threads, discuss sweet/savoury mental blocks, and take time to laud the late, great Terry Pratchett.There's loads more besides, and to make a contribution yourself please contact us: [e-mail]. We'd love to hear from you!***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Peloton all-access membership separate. Learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running. We are still in the midst of an historic week for the Luke and Pete show, as we remain the only podcast on the planet to have been sent in the post a roll of aviation speed tape. Aviation speed tape that sits proudly in this office. I'm Luke Moore. That's Pete Donaldson. This is the Luke and Pete show, your one-stop shop for hand-delivering

aviation speed tape. I literally thought of that this morning. Literally, guys, because I had a bit of a leak in my bathroom, which is just a toy for me now. It's just a toy that delights, disgusts in equal measure.

They fitted an extractor fan above my shower uh at the time i said well where's that steam gonna go uh it turns out it's just gonna go into a piece of plaster board that's above the shower uh that is now leaking water because you've got the plaster board has been completely soaked completely covered in water hey bro i heard you like a shower while you shower so i've got you a shower so you can shower while you shower, dog. Pete, is it as useful? It's annoying because I warn them about this.

Is your bathroom less useful than your oven, which is currently being used for storage? Well, I mean, who knows? I haven't turned it on for a while. It might blow up. This might be the last podcast I do. But it's weird when you have a situation where you've warned somebody about something

and it comes off exactly as you thought it would. You feel quite proud. You feel proud, but also, well, I've still got to deal with the fallout of this. I've still got to get someone in, haven't I? But it's quite cathartic, sort of just getting a saw and sawing into my ceiling this morning. Oh, that's amazing.

That's amazing. I think listeners will... No better way to start the day. No, yeah. I think listeners will be very keen to know exactly the type of character you are, Pete, and I'll get to the bottom of that for them when I say just simply this.

Is it more important for you to be right than to have a functioning bathroom? Well, I've got one of those things, so you've just got to thank heavens for the small mercies, as Margaret Atwood once said. Yeah. But at least that is salve to your wound that you were right all along. It's my pat of butter for the hand.

Because I usually am. I mean, that is the thing, isn't it? That's usually how it pans out. What are you doing? I thought you were going to get your phone out. I was about to tell you off for your phone making a noise, and I realised it was actually my phone. Recently, also on the Luke and Pete show,

while we've still got Pete, did you manage to have a shower this morning or not? Are you clean? Yeah, no, the shower's fine. I'm clean. But I keep on looking at it going. It's going to collapse. It's going to collapse.

Right, so while we've still got Pete alive, we should cherish every moment we can on the Aviation Speed Tape-sponsored Luke and Pete show. I just think I just needed that tape this morning to tape it up. It would have been perfect. Why don't you take it? I know. Take it back and take photos.

Take photos. We've also had dating tips from Mr. Pete Donson sat to my left. We've had wood lice chat. We've had it all. With the exception of what you've just told us, Pete, now we're on Thursday. We're gazing lustily towards the weekend, are we not? How has your week been overall? It's not been bad.

I've been quite busy. Meetings and cheatings. I've been going through old Football Rumble podcasts that combined something together. So I've been listening to your voice quite a lot. Sorry about that. It's weird how deep our voices have got in 10 years. That's disappointing.

I don't even smoke. Well, you hear about men's voices getting deeper. But yeah, we had quite high voices, and we sounded like we loved each other. I still am very much in love with you, almost despite myself. But one thing we should say, you said that we've had meetings. You and I were sat not 10 or 15 feet away from the great Charlie Brooker yesterday. Oh, yeah, we were. He was sat on a table near us, wasn't he?

Well, you know the circles I go in, Luke, I barely give them a second look most times. Celebrities. To make it completely clear, it was very much a public place. The man was free to come and go as he pleased. The coincidence was that he managed to happen to sit near us. It was nothing to do with you. No.

Was it? I was blowing jewel smoke in his face. Yeah, you were vaping. I was vaping. I don't vape. Or jewel. Are you into vaping? No.

Could you get into it? Vaping culture fascinates me. Can you see yourself getting into it? No, because it's a little bit too close to the Craft Ale movement. Oh, yeah, true. But I like the tech behind it. I like people who have apps. They supercharge and hack the firmware.

Cigarettes have firmware now. It's incredible. Can you explain to us a bit about what that actually means? There's technology involved. It's not just a dispenser to dispense nicotine smoke into your lungs. There's more involved than that. Well, they have little processes on them that dictate how much smoke how rich the

fat rip is. And if you want to take a fatter rip that goes above and beyond and outside the realms of what the manufacturer intends, you can plug a USB device in or flash it somehow, flash the firmware

and change how much fat rippage you get from that sweet, sweet vape. Do you even vape, bro? We're going to the football on Saturday, aren't we, again, together? Hey, that'll be good. We're going out together again. I can't believe it. That Saturday as well, aren't we? Hey, that'll be good. We're going out together again. I can't believe it.

That's too much, isn't it? That's twice in a month. I'm very grateful to spend time with you. I think you're a fantastic man and I enjoy your company a great deal. Can I ask you a question

that I would like you to answer honestly, though? Right, okay. Have so many of your friends fallen by the wayside now that you're just scrabbling around and I've been bumped.

I've been upped. I was chatting to a lad who was in Birmingham and he sort of dropped off the radar this week. But I don't want to ask if anything's wrong. Right. Because, I mean, he just might not want to chat. No. That's taking a turn.

It's taking a turn. I hope he's well. I hope he's found a life safe and well. Good. Something that floats my boat a lot is when sports stars offer a bit of personality. Yes, okay. And you'll see where I'm going with this.

There's a guy who played, American listeners will be aware of this, but I hope they will still enjoy a revisiting of it. I don't think many of our UK listeners will be aware of this. That's why I'm bringing it to the table. There is a guy who used to play receiver for the, uh, new England Patriots and the NFL. Right.

Called Wes Welker. A bit of a character. Um, I'm not an expert in that sport, but as far as I'm led to believe he's a, uh, he was a good player as well. And,

um, he conducted one of the funniest pregame. I think it was interview. Yeah. It was pregame interviews I've ever seen from a sports star. Let me get, before we it was, interview. Yeah, it was pre-game interviews I've ever seen from a sports star. Before we play it, let me give you a bit of context. In 2010, the New York Jets were preparing

to play the New England Patriots. And their coach was a guy called Rex Ryan. And shortly before the game, a foot fetish video of a woman appearing to be Rex Ryan'syan's wife yes um surfaced uh on the internet uh it features uh her having her feet sort of massaged and played with and commented on by an unseen person behind the camera nice feet with a voice very similar to her husband rex ryan um and the new york jets jumped on top of this and said, let you know, it's a private matter

and they would provide no comment. And then loads of people started reporting, doing some digging around, found that there was an account on some website linked to the Ryans called I Have Pretty Feet, and then loads of other stuff went on. After all this surfaced, they were due to play the England Patriots, as I've said,

and all-round joker and receiver Wes Welker was called up to give an interview ahead of the game about how he saw the game going. And it went on for quite a long time, so we can't play the whole thing, but we should play now some of the highlights of it because it is absolutely brilliant. Roll that tape.

I mean, the guy is, he is who he is. And he does a great job of making sure everybody's on the same page and and uh everybody's putting their best foot forward you can't just stick your toe in the water especially you know you got your foot up in the air when to go out there and just put your best foot forward he's got great feet you know he's good feet he's another guy who's a great feet you want to make sure that uh you know you bring your best foot forward out there let's go out there and being good little foot soldiers you definitely have to be on your toes and and make sure that you're ready to go i think he got through something like 35 examples of foot or feet

or something like that how many times did he say get get your best foot forward oh mate and the thing is he managed to do it like almost perfectly um straight face the whole time and answered all the answers contextually, just referencing feet and foot over and over again. It was absolutely fantastic. I think the Patriots won the game as well. So he wasn't on the... So it was an opposition team that was all about the feet and stuff like that.

Opposition coach. And so he was just basically taking the rise out of the guy. But I think that there must be loads of in plain sight, pornographic or otherwise, quite famous people who are involved in different bits and bobs. I was reading this morning about Terry Pratchett being involved in, this isn't going to go on to put my history, being involved in a mod for the video game like Skyrim or Oblivion or something like that. Basically, are you familiar with mods? A video game that clever people change to their liking. And Terry Pratchett was involved with a woman who did these things. And he helped create dialogue.

Obviously, he's a celebrated writer. Helped create dialogue. I used to love him when I was a teenager. I used to read his books all the time. I loved it. Anything Pratchett was definitely... All the Discworld stuff was fantastic was it Truckers?

I used to the one that sticks in my mind was one called Men at Arms yeah fantastic I love the covers as well

so he got involved in that so he got involved in that and he also obviously he's starting to lose his mind a little bit

with his disease so he was asking her to basically change the game in a certain way so that if he got into a dungeon he could ask the companion that was with him um can you help me out this dungeon because i've completely lost because he's obviously yeah his mind's getting to a place where he can't remember things he's like i don't know where i am i need to get out of this dungeon and so he'd ask the the partner in the game and she'd programmed it such that he or she would, I think it was she,

would lead him out of the dungeon. Right. So she was helping him get over, allow him to play the game in the advancing stage of dementia. Wow, that's amazing. Which is fantastic. And this is nowhere near

as impactful or powerful, but just so I'm clear as to what you mean. Is this a similar type of thing when on skyrim someone changed all the dragons to be macho man randy savage yeah yeah yeah okay because that is stunningly to look at that it is incredible oh thomas the tank engine yeah it's uh i wasn't it wasn't it didn't didn't the macho man randy savage dragons instead of breathing fire just go oh yeah that's brilliant it's good but i think with um but i think with like

celebrities they've got private lives they've got free time they've got downtime yeah there are probably more than you expect i reckon the greatest they'd be quite a thrill for a famous

woman or a famous man uh to be like somebody on a on a dirty little forum oh cool completely anonymously this is a double bluff um can I just say to finish this little section

Rex Ryan did say a response to this interview from Wes Welker he said I can take it I'm not going to discuss it but I can take it nice

so he didn't mind yeah he didn't mind I think it was The Rock's dad's wrestling partner we discussed this to great effect

on Wrestle Me a wrestling podcast we do and we're talking about he was a foot fetishist I forget which wrestler it was but he was a big foot fetishist

as a character or he was in the online no I mean real life so basically his autobiography is just mainly about what makes a good foot I think I've

I think I've spoken to Mark about this I can't remember I can't remember who it was but there's him at like an expo like one of those things where you get remember who it was. But there's him at an expo, one of those things where you get to meet the wrestlers.

And there's a couple of pictures of him just getting walked on by a woman. And he's just having a lovely time. But it's one of those fetishes that I can definitely sort of get behind. I reckon it would be so much fun. Because if you're in defeat, you see him all the time.

You'd be like, oh, look at that foot. Lovely. Especially in winter. He's like, oh, look at that lovely shoes. I don't think you should be doing it unsolicited. No, no, but if there's people who walk in passing, they've got nice shoes on or they've got nice feet, you'd be like, whee.

Oh, I could admire a nice pair of shoes. Listen, mate, I'm wearing a classic loke black half brogue today. Yeah, but it's not dirty, though, is it? It's not a dirty thing. What do you mean? But if you really get off on feet, they're quite visible. I like boobs and bums, right? Let's get that out of there.

I'm still not bored of them. But maybe in the future I'll get into something else. That's what you mean. There's a shelf life on this. As I get older, legs are getting better. I don't know.

I'm growing as a person, Luke. There's nothing new under the sun, Pete. Speaking of books... Legendary boob man Pete Donaldson is changing, guys. This is a great little thrill, actually.

Famous people who have some sort of reason to write a book about themselves, i.e. an autobiography, and for various reasons you subsequently learn nothing about them. That one sounds perfect. Another one I'd like to put in the mix under that sort of banner is Rick Mayall's book, which is amazingly called Bigger Than Hitler, Better Than Christ,

where you learn nothing about the man. It's basically 250 words of him just, 250 pages of him just dicking about. But in one minute you'll flip the page

and it'll be he's written a letter to the Prime Minister asking them to stop, you know, for making everyone wear nappies again. It's absolutely relentless

and you learn nothing about him. I think that's the only autobiography I've probably stomached, to be honest. And even when you think, oh, he's going to start talking a bit about his life here, you realise pretty quickly it's actually a story which involves him having sex with a supermodel at the end, saving the world, killing Batman.

It just goes mental. It goes absolutely mad. So that's definitely a book worth a read, I would say. There was a lovely clip that somebody clipped out of an old Batman where I think Commissioner Gordon and his lackey

Commissioner Gordon was on the phone to Bruce Wayne while his lackey was told at the same time to call Batman and inform him of what was going on

so Bruce Wayne slash Batman had two phone things and had to have a conversation with himself via the phone. It was really, really confusing. It's a lovely bit of

television. What do you make about of Christian Bale as Batman? What do you make of his voice? I find it baffling. I can't remember how

he sounds. Just talks like that all the time. Well, you need Batman to talk like that, don't you? Otherwise, everyone would know who he was.

I found The Dark Knight to be excellent. I found The Dark Knight to be excellent. I found The Dark Knight Rises to be absolutely terrible. I just didn't get with it at all. Right. It's just all that exploding things, macho stuff. I enjoy any Nolan. Nolan's pretty much my favourite director, I'd say.

I found Bane a very one-dimensional baddie. I couldn't hear what he was bloody saying. Exactly. Exactly. You can do it. You do a fairly good impression of him, don't you what he was bloody saying. Exactly. Exactly. You can do it. You do a fairly good impression of him, don't you? Yeah, I'm not going to do it. Let's have a break.

I'm back. I've got some emails here, and some of them, it's sort of like, it's a bit about woodlice again, so stick around. Lovely. You're probably wondering

why I'm in a cold, dark room repeatedly spilling molasses. Now, that's a fetish. I can see you getting into that. I told you about a mate, a mate who's a big fat guy back at college that he... I found on his computer

some fetish videos where women would cover themselves in cake and syrup and stuff like that. So he's combining his two great loves. I've got no problem with that. Look, as I've always said to you, Pete. Let's not kink shame.

On and off air. What goes on between consenting adults is completely up to them. I've got no judgement to be made. It's fascinating. You have just reminded me of a situation.

It's not fetish based but it is, I think, worthy of note. When I first moved into halls of residence at uni in my first year, I had an amazing, they're called like houses,

I had an amazing house. No, it's a bit, but in they call them houses so i was in a house called mckenna which which had uh they're all known because it was on an old raf base they're all named after yeah um famous raf people anyway this guy this guy apparently mckenna i don't know what he did but that's the name of our house and um that's probably about i don't know maybe 40 people in it 20 downstairs, 20 upstairs, and a shared bathrooms and shared kitchen

and all that usual stuff. Anyway, so as a result, you'd get quite a good insight into people's habits. So you'd know what time of day most people had a shower,

for example, because there was only three showers to get to wait. You know what time people would have meals because they'd go to the communal kitchen, the usual stuff. There was this one guy, I won't have meals because they'd go to the communal kitchen. The usual stuff. There was this one guy,

I won't name him because it'd be unfair, but there was this one guy who for breakfast cereal, instead of pouring the cereal into the bowl and putting milk on it, he would do that

but with M&Ms. Wow. That is specialist. Yeah. You can get away with that kind of care for only that age, can't you?

Or what? He was big then. He was a big guy. He was big even then. He was a big guy, yeah. That's no way to start the day. Where's the fibre? 18 years old, probably as well, 19.

My God. Do you reckon he's still with us? Also, quite an expensive breakfast. You know what I mean? That's probably costing you three quid a morning. Yeah, that's a bit much, isn't it? That's crazy talk. Yeah, and there was also a guy I knew who was from the West Country.

I won't name him either because that would be unfair. But these are the two. I'm very much an overeater. I love getting stuck into the junk food. Dietarily, I'm very, very poor. Same here. So I'm always looking for inspiration. So I'm not trying to shame the guys.

But there's one guy also who used to have a massive pot of clotted cream and a massive box of Cadbury's roses. To dip them in? Yeah, he used to unwrap a rose, Cadbury's rose, dip it right on the clotted cream and eat it. What does the clotted cream add to that particular situation? I don't know, some sort of fresh smoothness, I guess. Is it?

I mean, imagine how many calories are jam-packed into every single one of those little things. I think three cabbage roses is like probably about 120 calories or something like that.

Have you ever eaten an entire packet of biscuits in one go? When I was a kid, I used to go. I used to, yeah, I don't do it anymore, but as recent as

four years ago, I would say that I would gorge on sweets. Like, if they're there, I just, they're done. They're gone. That's the biggest problem in eating that kind of stuff.

Like it's food. Yeah. Massively. And it's not, it's just not guys. Frank McKenna. I've found what he's, what he did.

He personally arrested over 20 of the Gestapo agents involved in the murders of recaptured officers who'd escaped in the Great Escape from Stalag Luft 3. Brilliant. And also it says here that his fetish was sniffing bike seats. There we go, nice, everyone's got one. I'm joking. Actually, you know, speaking of that, one of the houses in my halls of residence was called Lawrence, and I later

found out there was an end of a T.E. Lawrence, as in Lawrence of Arabia. So he was based there as well. Big talk. It's all been condemned now and knocked down so it's not there anymore so any Luke and Pete show super fans who want to go on

a pilgrimage anywhere don't go there put a blue plaque up yeah should do should do yeah got an email Luke hello at Luke and Pete show.com of course

if you want to get in touch as this person has done well Blair Blair Herring hello Blair basically we've not done much battery chat recently,

but I think this might be a new challenger. Nai Li Wang. Yeah, new. A new player. We need a little jingle. A new player has entered the game. Nai Li Wang. I mean, more disappointing.

These gems showed up in my new travel milk frother. What? Never email this shot again. Travel milk frother? It's difficult to say, let alone comprehend. Blair, she likes some frothy milk. That's the thing. Travel milk frother. Someone. It's difficult to say, let alone comprehend. She likes some frothy milk. That's the thing. Travel milk frother.

It's hard to say. Travel milk frother. So there's a pair of batteries called what, did you say? Nailing Wang. Nailing Wang. Very good. Very good. Lovely.

Like that. Have you got an email, Luke? Yeah, I have. I've got an email here for Dave. Dave O. Dave says, Hi, fellas. Long time listener.

Second time emailer. Whoa. Previously wrote in to you regarding the incredibly exciting subject of tubeless bike tyres. That's the level we operate at. We haven't talked about tubeless bike tyres in a little while, have we? Well, listen, I think we're about to touch on it again here. Dave says, I write this email using my remaining good hand as I'm nursing the mangled wreckage

that is my left wrist after a spectacular mountain biking crash on Sunday on the Hero Trail in Bright, Victoria. See attached photograph for evidence. Waiting to have surgery on said wrist to have a metal plate inserted to fix it all back together again, I caught up on your latest episode

to provide some much needed distraction from the pain. You'll be pleased to know my tubeless bike tires survived the incident unscathed. Referring to the enthralling conversation regarding wood lice, I can indeed confirm that they do eat seafood themed bugs here down under in the form of Morton Bay bugs. Right. I think I see them called Byron Bay bugs, but obviously very similar. We've had a few emails about that and some beautiful pictures. They are delicious, especially on the barbie stuff with herbs and garlic butter.

My right hand is very tired now, so I'll bid you farewell. Keep up the good work, chaps. They look, I mean, I guess it sounds like they're eaten almost the way you'd eat a lobster with like a herb butter. The picture, the picture, it looks exactly like a gigantic prawn. Check out that. Doesn't that look lovely? It looks amazing, but get a picture of it up when it's in the sea

because it looks mad. Oh, okay. It does look exactly like a giant woodlouse. Bug. Dave also says he's a Luton Town fan and would like to take this opportunity to lord it up over Portsmouth supporters after last night's fantastic win.

Yeah. The less you say about that, the better. Yeah, I mean, it does just look like a lobster. It looks more like a lobster than a woodlouse, but it's a big gray area between between that and a yeah when people look pete when we're calling bugs and i'd eat them yeah true that's that's part of it when um i have this really bad sort of mental brock where i don't like eating things that are traditionally sweet that have been turned savory right okay so like for example someone So like, for example, someone makes like a spinach and cheese muffin

that looks like a choc-chip muffin. It's like my brain can't comprehend it. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It feels like it should taste sweet, but it's like a cheese scone as well. I remember going up to Scotland once, and with my girlfriend at the time, we traveled around Scotland quite extensively and stayed at that bed and breakfast.

And stayed at this one place where this lady who ran at that bed and breakfast, and stayed at this one place, where this lady who ran this little bed and breakfast, she was absolutely lovely, such a nice lady, and we called her to let her know we were on our way, and she said, all right, great, yeah, and we turned up,

and she welcomed us into essentially her home, and told us this story about how she converted her home into a bed and breakfast because her husband had passed away, and she didn't want to get lonely it's a really nice story she's a lovely lady and it was

an amazing time the problem was that she was so nice that when we turned up she put on an amazing plate of homemade cheese

scones right cheese scones it's supposed to be sweet but they're savoury so the mental block kicks in

I think cheese scones are probably the only ones that I actually like because scones are actually quite peppery. They've got a weird mix of kind of like this. Again, they're supposed to be sweet, but they're actually quite peppery. I wouldn't say they are that sweet. It's the stuff you put on them. To cut a long story short, I muscled my way through one. Oh, what a legend.

But it was a pleasurable experience. Anyway, what was I going to say? I was going to say to you that, yeah, I've got a bit of a mental block. But when scholars in generations to come start doing sort of Radio 4 type retrospectives on this show, Pete, do you think they'll start to observe the Woodlice era as the creative high point? Or would they say it's going to be probably where it lost its way a bit?

Jump the shark like Fonz in Happy Days. Genital injuries. We probably had a few of them. We probably had that era, didn't we? That was a low point. You talked about

fecal matter quite a lot at the start. No, you insisted on talking about my fecal position. Fecal position? My evolution. Well, my position is I'm for it.

It's got to be done. Frank Jaeger, actually. Should we put that in there? Yeah, that's on it. Hello. He's not said please take my name out. Poor old Kieran. Kieran's still missing in action.

Yeah, hello to him. I hope you're both well. Smiley face. I've been listening to The Ramble since 2010 and lapsed from the start. Always great. Thank you kindly. We actually met back in 2012 at a kickabout in Regions Park on the day that I saw Juan

Mata in the Teletubbies house. I remember, yeah. I think it's called The Hub. I fouled someone quite badly that day and I felt bad about it. You're not a nice footballer. No. I wanted to write to thank Luke for your free solo recommendation. I noticed it was on at a local independent cinema last week.

Oh, can I interject? It's actually been nominated for an Oscar. Has it? Which I was desperately hoping it would, as I said on this show, and it has been. So I noticed it was on at a local independent cinema last week. Oh, can I interject? It's actually been nominated for an Oscar. Has it? Which I was desperately hoping it would, as I said on this show and it has been,

so I hope it wins. Why, have you got points on the dollar? I wish. Have you got 20 on 20? If it wins an Oscar, I'm going to climb El Cap free solo.

It might influence people to free climb El Cap. Yeah, I noticed it was on at a local independent cinema last week and I thought I'd just have to watch it. However, it just happened to fall on a date when I was planning to take a little trip on LSD. My girlfriend was busy that day.

Get in. So I dropped it and went in an hour or so later and just, wow, I was sweating buckets through my palms, anxious, terrified, totally amazed, and it was easily the best cinema experience of my life. What a beauty. What terror. Thank you for the tip, pal.

Obviously, then I left the cinema, became totally disorientated. My phone melted into my life. What a beauty. What terror. Thank you for the tip, pal. Obviously, then I left the cinema, became totally disorientated. My phone melted into my hand. I got lost, had a bit of a weird trip and ended the evening crying into my girlfriend's lap while she was no doubt wondering

whether it was time to get a normal boyfriend. Yeah. I mean, stay in school, kids. Don't go outside. No, yeah. I mean, I sort of think,

I've never done LSD, but I was I was so drawn to it I was thinking if I ever did it like I wouldn't jump out the window but I know where the knives are

it's the first thing I think about yeah listen guys stay safe all I'll say is stay safe it's a great movie you don't need

to take on board any recreational substances to enjoy it also microdosing LSD is a subculture I would have thought you guys may have read into I'm sure we spoke about microdosing I think we a subculture I would have thought you guys may have read into.

I'm sure we spoke about microdosing, weren't we? So apparently it makes you more productive, opens the mind, et cetera. I've been trying it for a month as a trial

and effects so far are mild. What do you reckon? Put it out there. How many of us are pretending it's working? I like the idea that Frank has a non-creative job.

He's a bin man or something. Just get your work done Frank for fuck's sake whoa listen the dustbin lorry left like 15 minutes ago

you're going to have to run the catch up with it now that was a good email but thank you for that who's it from name him Frank Frank Jaeger

Frank Frank it sounds like a nom de plume so thank the lord Frank Jaeger's a great name if it isn't if you we will

Pete Donaldson editing errors aside we will pete donaldson editing errors aside we will protect the uh the the innocent here yeah we will hide your name and keep you anonymous if you want but you have to let us know i was hauled over the course but don't put your name at the bottom of the email then i won't read it quite there we go all right i'm going to step up look i think we're probably coming to the end of the road when it comes to woodlice but i'm going to step up the chat once more, another notch, just one final time, because I got an email from Hugh, and I do think it adds something new to the genre.

He's reinventing the wheel here. He says, Hi guys, your recent chat about where all the woodlice have gone reminded me of a weird habit I had as a toddler. I have been told that on several occasions they would come into a room and find me, my parents, would come into a room and find me, my parents, would come into a room

and find me sucking on something. When asked to spit it out, almost always, it turned out to be a now deceased woodlouse. To this day, every time I'm at my parents' house and my dad finds one,

he will bring it to me and ask me if I'm hungry. That's what dads are great on. That's textbook dad behaviour. It's just a weird thing to suck on, isn't it? Hugh says I'm nearly 30 That's what, dad's a great, that's textbook dad behaviour. It's just a weird thing to suck on, isn't it? Hugh says,

I'm nearly 30 and he still finds it hilarious. And he also finishes by saying, I love the show, I particularly find Luke's Gosport

references nostalgic as I also grew up there. Cheers, Hugh. Nice. Don't know Hugh, he's probably quite

a bit younger than me. Oh he is, he's 30. So he is younger than me, but yeah, Gosport was a, I mean,

as characterful as where you grew up, Pete, I imagine. I didn't have a sea cold lorry smash into the front room of my house. No. But there were other things that went on. So there we go. Don't suck on woodlice at home. Don't take recreational substances unless you're very, very sure what you're doing and keep it safe.

Sounds like he is. He sounds like he does know what he's doing, to be honest. Yeah. Anyway. There we go. Is that about it? I reckon so, because my voice is starting to do that kind of like gurgly thing. You've got Rambles to do later, brother.

I've just got Rambles, mate. You've got Going for Glow to host later. Excuse me. Yeah, if you want to get into the show, it's hello at lukenpeachshow.com. Wasn't the sky lovely this morning? And now it's gone grey. It's clouded over. Listen, it's Thursday the 31st of January.

It's hard to dance with the devil on your back. We've got through January. The devil on our back that is January. We're through it. It's February. February's on its way. I'm on holiday on the 21st and I've got so much to do. Get your daffodils planted.

Because they're coming out. They are coming out. I love a daffodil. Daffodils, weirdly. I don't know if it's because I haven't a Welsh mum or whatever, but our dad is a Morrissey. Morrissey is dad. Speaking of your dad, your niece, i.e. your dad's

granddaughter, completely mugged him off when you sent me a video of it. That was brilliant. Little baby Emma, there was a picture of Jeremy Corbyn

paused on the television in the house and she pointed at Jeremy Corbyn's white beard and went, Grandad? Your dad would have

hated that. Whoa, my dad. My dad, to the very core of him. My dad, apart from being an old lefty, not anymore, because the Daily Mail has poisoned him. He has that lovely kind of...

I don't know what WhatsApp groups he's involved in. We've all got a couple of friends who are in WhatsApp groups. You get to 55 and you automatically find people like john prescott diane abbott and jeremy corbin uh problematic or humorous yeah and it's kind of every punchline to every joke is either diane abbott jeremy corbin or uh latterly uh john prescott two jags two jags remember that remember when he drank um the condensed milk because he had an eating disorder yeah that came that came out of left field, that. Yeah, I didn't see that coming to me.

Just goes to show you, actually, on a more serious note, it can affect anyone. Massively. Listen, helloatlukeandpeach.com to get in touch. M&M's for breakfast, probably. If you had M&M's for breakfast

as a substitute breakfast cereal, probably had less sugar in it than some of the cereals these days. Get in touch, helloatlukeandpeach.com, but of course you can get in touch for any other reason at all. We'd love to hear from you thank you very much

and we shall talk to you again on Monday bye bye see you Monday dickheads this was a Radio Stakhanov production.