The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 155: A dog in the playground

Episode Date: April 1, 2019

Welcome back to your all-new shiny episode of The Luke and Pete Show. Spring has sprung, so what better way to get out there and enjoy the sunshine than to pop this episode in your headphones? Don't answer that. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.This time around, there's talk about foreign food when we were growing up, there's a bit on April Fool's Day, a truly baffling Tom Hiddleston advert, a wonderfully boring school trip, and lots, lots more.To get in touch, it's [e-mail], and we're @lukeandpeteshow on Twitter. Come and say hello!***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh, you little Reggie blinker. Yes, yes. How are you doing? It's Luke Peatchaw, or LAPS for short. Some, some, an acronym. It's actually not a, oh, it is an acronym because it's a word. An acronym I use sometimes to people who are unfamiliar with our working processes. They have no idea what I'm talking about.

I've got to do, I've got to record a LAPS and I'm like, what? Yeah, what? We get three emails a week on average from people saying, if you'd called it the Pete and Luke show, it would be pals. To which I think, yeah, I should have thought of that. Yeah. Didn't know. Yeah, I probably had my own reservations about coming second,

but yeah, who cares? Pete. I'm a gentleman. I always come second. Yeah. And it's also alphabetical. Yeah. So it's just the way of the world.

What was I going to say to you? Oh, yeah, I was going to say to you, you are the wackiest man I know. Yeah. So it's just the way of the world. What was I going to say to you? Oh yeah, I was going to say to you, you are the wackiest man I know. Yeah. Now, actually, that's wrong.

Forget that. Because to me, wackiness implies it's forced, it's done on purpose. Yeah, we've said this on the show, I'd hate to be thought of

as a wacky man. No, you're not wacky. You're not, you're, you're, you are. Obtuse prick.

You're a, you're a wonderful eccentric in the fine British tradition of ecc wacky. No, you're not wacky. You're just an obtuse prick. You're a wonderful eccentric in the fine British tradition of eccentrics. And we've recorded five podcasts today. Already. Already.

And you're still being nice to me. This is a record. It doesn't wear thin when I'm with you. It doesn't wear thin. But it is April Fool's Day today. It is April Fool's Day. The most tedious day of the year.

The home territory of the wacky, of the Colin Hunts of this world. Is it Colin Hunt? Yeah, from Far Shore. Is it Far Shore? Yeah, yeah. And I wondered, Pete, if you played any good April Fool's Day pranks

when you were a kid or whatever. I'm concerned we probably did this last April, but I can't really remember. No. I remember being a big fan of Comic Relief. I was very big on being a bit of an idiot on that day. I would dress up stupid. Oh, yeah.

But I'm not really... I think pranks are rather cruel. Yeah. I don't really rate pranks that much. April Fools, I have been caught by one person today. Some lads from IGN started their own thing called RKG. They couldn't call it Prepare to Try, which is their vehicle inside IGN, because they own the name, so they had to find another name.

And then the original people who are still there at IGN pretended they were going to start Prepare to Try video. And they were getting pelters, or they were getting love. I think they were just fishing for... Is this tenable? Should we use it? Yeah, should we do this? What's the reaction? Yeah.

Yeah. Last year, apparently, I've just checked, this time last year, you were talking to us about meeting Bryan Cranston. Okay. There doesn't appear to be much April Fool's chat at all. Last year, we did the show on the 2nd of April, not the 1st. Yes. So, I thought I would...

I think I was a fan of making a lot of April Fool's pranks when I was a kid. I think I tried to convince everyone there was a dog in the school at one point. Do you remember when a dog used to come into the school? Yeah, that was always exciting. It's just brilliant. Dog in the playground was always exciting, wasn't it? That's just brilliant.

Yeah, wonderful. What was that dog thinking? What do you mean? When it happened. So what used to happen in my school? Well, you see stray dogs are just all over the place that you just don't see them now. But what did a dog... I vividly remember a dog

coming into our playground and it wasn't a stray. It had been out for a walk with its parent. Dad. And it got through the gate, which was open, with a stick in its mouth.

And it was running around the playground with a stick in its mouth. So exciting. And everyone was like, wow, it's amazing. My heart is pounding just thinking. Yeah, we couldn't go out because it was the middle of lessons

and we were looking through the window. And the dog definitely came close enough to see us all looking at him. And looking back on it now, I think the dog was bloody enjoying it. Yeah. Look at me, everyone. What would it have thought? Well, it's just, I just think the brilliance of it is just this free animal doing whatever the hell it wants. It broke in, it's doing whatever the hell it wants, and it'll just go at some point.

But while it's there, everyone has to watch it. At any point, did the dog come inside your school? No. No, that'd be too much. So you convinced the entirety of the school that a dog was in the school? No, no, just got me thinking.

I think I probably, at some point, I was the kind of kid, the show-off kid, to sort of say to everyone in the class, oh, there's a dog in the playground. Everyone would have gone and looked and it wouldn't have been there.

But at one point, there was a dog in the playground. Nothing vicious. Because, and the only way I would have thought of that idea would have been because it had happened in the past. Nothing vicious. Because, and the only way I would have thought of that idea would have been because it had happened in the past. You're literally the boy who cried wolf relation.

Yeah, exactly. Some of the famous April Fool's pranks, some of them are quite good. Apparently in the 1950s, BBC TV show Panorama, is that still on now? Yeah. Panorama, yeah. It ran a segment about the Swiss spaghetti harvest enjoying a bumper year,

thanks to mild weather and the elimination of the spaghetti weevil. And many people were taken in thought that spaghetti did indeed grow on trees, essentially. To be fair, back then, I mean, Panorama was definitely an evening show. They shouldn't be doing that. It's way too late, unless it was after midnight. Yeah, I guess so, yeah. And so, yeah, that's a bit weird. But also, we didn't really eat a lot of exotic foods back then.

Spaghetti bolognese was a rare beast in my house. I don't think I had olives or hummus until I moved to London. No. I don't think I even knew what hummus was until I moved to London. No, we used to have prawn mayonnaise sandwiches where my mum would get the prawns out of the freezer

from Iceland or farm foods or wherever the hell. Heron was another freezer shop. And she'd let them defrost in tiny little babies. Tiny little baby shrimps.

Little cat's willies. Little cat's willies. And she'd put them on a, between two slices of pepper towels and then mix in the mayonnaise. My dad used to do that. Yeah.

My dad used to do that for it to put them in his stir fry. Yeah. Weird. Oh, there was no stir fries in my house. No, none of that, none of that foreign muck. But the,

did you have a Ken Hom hot wok? Yeah, that's how I got into it. Ken Hom started the wok. In the late 80s, Ken Hom was big and then my dad wanted a wok and he likes Chinese food. My dad likes the version of Chinese food

that he thinks is Chinese food but it's actually very British. Like mine, lemon chicken and crispy shredded beef wanted to walk and he likes Chinese food. My dad likes the version of Chinese food that he thinks is Chinese food but it's actually very British. Like mine, lemon chicken and crispy shredded beef. Yeah, and like foo youngs and that kind of stuff.

But, crispy egg rolls and stuff. I can remember also around that kind of time, it feels to me and it might just be our age, but I felt like I started to notice curry houses

when I was about 13 or 14, right? And my dad brought home a Chinese curry because he only likes Chinese food, really doesn't really like indian and um it was way too hot for me yeah but it was a chinese curry so slightly different flavor and obviously i was only a kid and um so my mom said i was you know what well i'll make you a curry i'll make you a curry that you and your sister can enjoy because obviously my sister was younger and she made a curry in quotes which was like rice So you obviously boiled rice or whatever.

Chicken, like a joint of chicken or whatever. And it was just cooked in Campbell's chicken soup. And served up on rice. And I used to really love it. It was absolutely delicious. Yeah, I guess that would work, though, wouldn't it? But it was in no way, shape, or form resembling anything to do with a curry. And we used to have bread and butter with it rather than naan bread. It was like such a British thing to do.

But you know, another great April Fool's prank, and I covered this on TalkSport last week. I do a slot on there on Tuesday afternoon where I talk about sports books. It's part of the Hawksby and Jacobs show, for those of you who know who that is. Anyway, I did a little profile of George Plimpton, who's one of the greatest American sports writers,

dead now, but famously, um, famously, um, convinced the Detroit Lions in 1963 to let him play with them as a proper member of the preseason. Yeah. And,

uh, but apparently he is the father of one of the best April Fool's day pranks ever, where he invented a, um, a um a uh baseball pitcher called siddhartha finch right in his column for sports illustrated who could throw the ball 168 miles an hour was a um was like a buddhist and all these eastern spiritual stuff meant that he could throw the ball really fast and everything and loads of people people thought that it was true and that he was going to start playing for them in the new season. And people started turning out looking for him and all this other stuff. And it was so successful.

He actually ended up turning the story into quite a successful novel as well. So that was quite a good one, Peter. Quite a good April Fool's Day prank. was quite a good one peter quite a good april 4th it was um the one i fell for that i remember the most was on going live uh where philip scorefield um demonstrated a new kind of um it was in the late 80s early 90s this new kind of music player and it was like a little box about this big right yeah like a little black box on going live on going live love that and um you would press a button and it would play um the top 10 singles for that week. So it was basically a precast to an iPod.

And I was taken in massively by it. I was like, I want that. And you can win that if you want. Going live happened between 87 and 93 apparently, so that would have been way before. Oh, massively, yeah, yeah. So it was just basically a precast To the MP3 iPod Can I also add

On the Going Live tip Is that Going Live was Over three hours long And it was live Incredible really And it was children's TV Yeah

That is an incredible Achievement Yeah Do you remember This Morning with Richard Not Judy And also the Sunday show Yes

I think the girly show as well Richard Not Judy was With Richard Herring And Stuart Lee right Yeah so it was After Fist of Fun I loved Fist of Fun I loved Fist of Fun I loved short as well Richard Not Judy was with Richard Herring and Stuart Lee right yeah so it was after Fist of Fun I loved Fist of Fun I loved Fist of Fun

I loved This Morning with Richard Not Judy and that was an hour of you know pre-written but live performed live comedy television

which is I don't think I've ever done it again really I don't think I've ever risked how long was it an hour

it was an hour yeah I mean maybe I'm trying to think of like maybe the last stand but even then that's just I don't think I've ever done it again, really. I don't think I've ever risked... How long was it, an hour? It was an hour, yeah. I mean, maybe... I'm trying to think of, like, maybe the last stand, but even then, that's just fucking gags. They were not sketches.

They were not kind of linked in... Yeah, it's incredible effort. It was a beautiful... Someone saw the Football Ramble live, Pete. I think you should pick up tickets to the Football Ramble live at ramblelive.com. They are saying quite fast, actually.

I... Yeah, I'm... Surprised? Yeah. I watched a film last night Luke and I can't believe I've been pulled in again by a Craig Zala

film an S Craig Zala film who's that I don't know who that is well he wrote he's a writer composer

director kind of you know Jack of all trades kind of guy he I remember complaining quite vociferously about he did Born Tomahawk which is probably his breakout director, kind of, you know, Jack of all trades kind of guy. He, I remember complaining

quite vociferously about, he did Born Tomahawk, which is probably his breakout kind of film. What's his name, Peter? His name is S. Craig Zahler. Z-A-H-L-E-R. Right, okay. And I remember complaining

about a Vince Vaughn vehicle that was brawling at Cell Block 99. I interviewed Vince a couple of years ago for that and I thought it was fucking dreadful didn't say that to Vince he's massive but I started watching

Dragged Across Concrete it's a bit of like this director seems to be like a bit money ball and he'll pick up like actors that have kind of gone off a bit so the main leads

in this one are Mel Gibson and Vince Vaughn and I'm watching it and I'm like, and I didn't realise he was a director and I watched it last night and I was like,

oh, this really stinks of another film I watched a couple of years ago with Vince Vaughn and it's probably what linked it together. He wants to be this Tarantino

kind of like writer but all of the sayings that people say in it are just so kind of like long and it's so clunky the dialogue so clunky yeah but it's trying to be clever yeah and i can't stand it but i keep watching it because

there's always something new for me it was a it's a real hate watch for me but there are some nice set pieces where you go oh that's a nice idea but it's just not quite there and the dialogue is fucking dreadful and it really puts me off but i can't stop watching it. I've got this real love hit relationship with this guy's film so I'm going to have to go back and watch Bone Tomahawk.

Do I have to go watch it because it's interesting in that there's some of the kind of set pieces and imagery and characters but the dialogue is once again fucking

dreadful. Bone Tomahawk's got Kurt Russell in it and see what's his name? S. Craig Sala. Yeah. He's got a skullet as

well. He has got a bit of a skullet yeah I've never heard of him or any of his films I have to say I feel like I'm in the dark I'm in the fucking dark here

I'm in the dark here I'd only seen a brawl in Cellblock 99 it's just like like Mel gives something up and goes

they're in a stakeout they're about to do something dreadful and you know they might get this is the one with Vince Vaughn in it. They might get shot, they might get murdered, they might get killed. Completely off the clock when it comes to

being a policeman. And Mel Gibson goes, this is a bad idea. Like, the San Juan and Cairn, bad idea. What are you talking about? You're about to possibly die, Mel Gibson. Yeah, you wouldn't be saying that. You don't want that to be your last words. It was so shit. And there's something at the start

where they do this monologue where they got in trouble for beating up a Latino man because they're like these old grizzle detectives or rather officers. And Mel Gibson is told by his superior officer, it's a different time now, it's a different world now.

Even if you have a conversation with someone uh a private conversation uh and that gets leaked and you're saying terrible things um you know you can't you can't resurrect your career like literally talking about mel gibson's um yeah sounds kind of post-modern horrible horrible things he said on that phone call uh you know it's a miracle that man still has a career why would he agree to have those things said in a scene that he's in? He's just desperate for work, probably. Well, yeah, probably.

But like, yeah, it's fascinating. Has Vince Vaughn's career never really recovered from the second season of True Detective? Well, that wasn't long ago, I guess, was it? 2015.

Yeah. Four years ago now. He hasn't really done anything since, has he? No. Apart from these movies, yeah. He's in Brawling in Cellbook 99. Yeah, cool. That's exactly my point.

But that got a pretty good response. That got pretty good reviews. But I'm watching the same film and I'm going, I'm not having it. You're having it. Your film taste is slightly different, though. I feel... I just feel like...

He's done Hacksaw Ridge since then. And Anchorman 2 and all that stuff um yeah i just think that um i i don't know anchorman 2 was way before true detective season 2 mate it was like two or three years ago but before but um i was gonna say there's a um people aren't gonna agree with me on this but i'll put it out there anyway because i'm not scared to be controversial and i mean this sincerely the The M. Night Shyamalan film Signs, which I really like, I know some people don't,

I think the tension it builds up is so, so well done. Mel Gibson's excellent in that. He plays a preacher who's lost his faith. He's absolutely fantastic in it. He really is very good in it. He's a very good actor

and he's got incredible presence and you sort of watch his roles that he's taken after. Give me back my son! Remember that? I was taken. Give me back my son! Remember that? I was taken. Give me back my son! Is that Ransom?

Ransom. Oh, no, yeah. Is it? Okay. Mel Gibson, isn't it? Right. Ransom. Isn't that what he was complaining about on the phone call?

I'm not saying what he said on the phone call. No, don't say that. Go on. What? Give us back me son! Oh, you! Oh, dear. What, have you stopped that?

I thought you were going to have a break. I was going to have a break. You introduced the break. After the break, we're going to talk about your emails. ...is to find the right position for you. Put your hands down and lower your chest to the ground. Just do that and pretend that you're holding poop in. And it should sound a lot like this

Better a succulent Chinese meal It is Ken home hot walk. I've got a second Chinese meal in my fridge right now. Of course you have it's Monday Sunday beef chicken Some rice got me careful. Have you got yeah, you have you It's Monday. Custard and beef, chicken, some rice. Got to be careful with rice. Yeah, you have. You've got to the point yet where you just call them up and go, it's Pete. Yeah, see you in a half hour.

Deliveroo has got like a lot of options. You just order what you ordered last time. Yeah. It's just easy. One click and the man's there. Obviously, I've eschewed all fast food now, haven't I? Really? What do you eat instead?

Now you're asking. Blackberries. Blueberries, it seems. I'm day 29 into my healthy regime I've lost 14 pounds that's really good well done I've not lost

I've not had any fast food or anything are you drinking beer that's the thing oh I've had one burger with Sam because I had a pre-arranged thing booked with him

before burger situation yeah but other than that I haven't say what am I what have you had like beer and stuff

that's what kills me I've had a few parts of Guinness but nothing major Guinness isn't too bad though it's a 60 alcohol it gives quite a light beer Emails

Is it like Shentrum I've seen that advert with who's the fella who's Thor's brother in all of the Marvel films Loki Loki

who plays that Tom Hiddleston Tom Hiddleston's China advert where he's I find increasingly as we get older I'm having to fill in

I'm having to join the dots with people's names you can't remember Oh yeah No no no I do it all the get older I'm having to fill in I'm having to join the dots with people's names you can't remember oh yeah no no no I do it all the time whenever I'm on a podcast and I try and remember

someone's name I'm like who's that and I've got connection so we can get there eventually it's a nice little kind of round the houses it's a nice little game

for the person Tom Hiddleston what's he done he was featured in a Chinese advert where he plays a Gonzo-style kind of boyfriend to an invisible first-person Chinese lady. Right.

Basically, the camera comes into the kitchen and Tom Hiddleston's there. It's an advert for Centrum, is it? Shintrum, as he pronounces it. I think they call it Shintrum, even though it's C-E-N. It doesn't make any sense. I thought Centrum was a food supplement

it is like yeah and Tom Hiddleston's making breakfast for this unseen lady right and it's so

fucking creepy it really is terrible oh this is the way he eats like a weird plate of food yeah Tom Hiddleston advert

China isn't he eating like eggs blackberries peppers olives it's so yeah exactly so he comes out and he's going good morning advert China. Isn't he eating like eggs, blackberries, peppers, olives? It's so, yeah,

exactly. So he comes out and he's going, good morning. Good morning, how are you doing? I've been away for a little while

but I'll be back soon. Blah, blah, blah. And he's just sort of gone, I've made breakfast for you. Don't forget your shintrum.

What? Is this like a lost in translation kind of scenario? What do you mean? Like Bill Murray's advertising Japanese products and stuff.

Yeah well I mean every actor does that. Hey. Morning. Alright. Filmed in part right? For Insta mate. I finished early so

I'll pop back and make you breakfast. for Insta, mate. Look at the state of that food. Pepper on top, right? Oh, hi, you'll need a shantung. He's been told to pronounce like that, hasn't he? You look great. It's so creepy.

He's so earnest. I'll probably be a bit busy for the next few weeks. We're going to jail. I'll make it up to you soon, I promise. Yeah, don't break into my house again.

Bye, Tom Hiddleston. See you, Tom. I mean, what are you doing here, mate? This is really strange. He's making breakfast for a human being, but he's acting like he's never met that person before. Yeah. Which makes it creepy.

It's very interesting. It's a bit like... It's very much like Lost in Translation, in a weird way. It's more like bad Gonzo porn, really. First-person perspective kind of stuff. Yeah. It's so weird.

But the actual plate of food he makes, it's like blackberries on one side. Carrots. Then it goes like carrots eggs onions fried egg one fried egg on top

onions peppers sweet corn sweet corn line of sweet corn and this is purple cabbage red cabbage

purple cabbage and then on the end it's chillies yeah but it's clearly mirroring the rainbow kind of shinshum

thing colour scheme colour scheme on the logo. I'd love to, Shinchum. I'd love you to do a version of that advert

but instead of in that beautiful house with that quirky soundtrack, it's like, it's quite a, it's almost like a black metal soundtrack in the background.

Ugh! Like that. It's in your flat and it's just leftover Chinese food from the night before. No, it'd be five different

kinds of blood. Yeah. This one's from a pig. Don't forget your shinshum. Right. Hello at LukeandPeteShaw.com is where to send your emails. The people we're about to hear from have done exactly that. Yeah, the mystery meat of the Hello at Luke and Pete Shaw email box.

I'd like to start with an email from Jasmine, if I may, Peter. Ah, fuck off, yeah, Shaw, email box. I'd like to start with an email from Jasmine, if I may, Peter. Ah, fuck off, yeah. All right, thanks. We heard a week or so ago about a school trip which descended very quickly into something like a scene from... Lot of the Flies. ...brilliant Italian drama, Gamora, which is back, by the way.

I haven't watched it yet. Yeah, it's two episodes out already, but I haven't seen it yet. Jasmine would like to weigh in with a school trip situation of her own and she says hi Luke and Pete

I hope you're both having a good week we are but it's only Monday so there's time for it to go wrong I could get gout soon you could she says I'm a relatively

new listener to the show having been introduced to you by my boyfriend he now regrets doing this as over the last few months I've dedicated myself to listening to your back catalogue

and have realised that all the funny slash interesting facts he told me he had read somewhere or stories from a friend of a friend are actually lifted

straight from your show. Jasmine, they are rarely facts. Jasmine, they're rarely facts and I do this all the time. If I slightly haven't met that person once

and they happen to do a podcast and I just steal their facts. Don't matter. We all do. Don't matter. We, and I'll just steal their facts. Don't matter. We're all on the same cesspit here. Don't matter. Hey, don't worry about it. The recent chat about dramatic school trips made me wonder

why my own were never as exciting or felonious, and I thought it might be interesting to hear about listeners' experiences of school trips from the other end of the spectrum. My contribution is a trip I went on in year three. So what age is that? Year three, that's... Seven or eight? Oh, right, okay. contribution is a trip I went on in year three. So what age is that? Seven? Seven or eight?

And the trip was to a classmate's back garden. I should preface this by saying my school was in special measures at the time and perhaps budgets were tight. That's when the shit really hits the fan. My friend Laura... I'm not sure if Hofstadter got involved because that was quite a later

developer for us, wasn't it? Yeah, maybe. Jasmine's included the full names of some of her friends and I'm not going to do that because that's unfair. So I'm going to just call her Laura.

Laura had recently moved to a new house which had a back garden with a pond in it. Nice. This was quite an exotic garden feature at the time and upon hearing

the exciting news, our teacher, who was quite eccentric and a keen bird watcher, insisted that the whole class should take a trip to Laura's garden to complete a tally chart of, insisted that the whole class should take a trip to Laura's garden to complete a tally chart of the birds visiting the pond.

Luckily, Sarah, another girl in our class, had a dad who owned a bus. So on a Monday morning, 30 of us travelled in Sarah's dad's bus to Laura's garden. It was freezing cold and we had to take shifts standing near the pond. There not being space for the whole class to all be there at once. A distinct lack of birds came to the pond and after an hour, the situation became so desperate, our teacher had to tell us to just do a sketch of the plastic heron perched on a rock standing guard over the pond.

The highlight of the trip was Laura's mum bringing us squash and biscuits before we traipsed back onto Sarah's dad's bus to return to school. Despite the uneventful nature of the trip, I remember quite enjoying it. However, it was made even more underwhelming due to the fact that being Laura's friend, I'd actually been to her new house the weekend before. I'm now a primary school teacher myself and make an extra effort to try and make school trips

as exciting as possible. So far, this has been successful, although I did once lose a child for 10 minutes inside the Natural History Museum and have had another child throw up on me following a leap of faith during a school residential. Hopefully underwhelming school trips. Teachers' experience of trips might be of some interest to you.

My boyfriend will be extremely jealous if you read out my email. Please keep up the podcast. I look forward to it on Mondays and Thursdays. Jasmine. Jasmine, you say your school trips are exciting. We haven't heard from any of your students. Exactly, yeah. None of your pupils have confirmed that.

And if I was a bird, I wouldn't be visiting a garden that's just full of school kids. Full of kids, aren't they? Yeah, crazy. Tim's got in touch. Hello, Tim. Dedicated listener with a be my bonnet. Annoying round of reference.

He says, centrifugal doesn't exist. Centripetal means acting inward. Centrifugal means nothing. Right. We've had this before. You said centrifugal. Yeah, but everyone's got a different opinion, it seems,

because we said that I was right. Some people said I was right. Tim Gabitas has not shown us the gravitas. He's not shown us any working out. He just says that it means nothing. Well, listen, apparently, according to Newtonian mechanics, a centrifugal force is an inertial force, also called a fictitious or pseudo force,

that appears to act on all objects when viewed in a rotating frame of reference. According to the online dictionary, though, centrifugal means moving or tending to move away from a centre. The jury's out. Yeah. You've got to be a special type of person to email about that, haven't you?

Yeah, you really have. Or an even special one to read it out. What's the name of the emailer? Tom. Tim. Tim, you belong on the emailer? Tom. Tim. Tim Gabadas. Tim, you belong on the fringes of our society, sir. That may sound like an insult, but it doesn't have to be.

Bag wrapping. Sorry? Bag wrapping. I beg your pardon. Do you want to hear from Sam in Dubai? Yes, please. In reference to your discussion about bag wrapping at airports.

Yeah. What do you think that's for, Pete? Bag wrapping. What do you mean? What's the reason for it? Just to watch your zip doesn't fly open and all your sundries comes out. Well, according to Sam from Dubai,

the purpose of the bag wrapping is not just to protect the bag when being thrown around, but to prevent theft of the items inside. Ah. I never understood the point of it much either until I married a South African and had to travel through Johannesburg airport.

I've been there as well. So have you, Pete. Chaos. Breaking into suitcases by piercing through the zipper with a pointy object and wading through the bag's contents

is apparently quite a problem in Johannesburg. Ah. He says, I can't point to any published statistics on the matter, but anecdotal evidence seems enough for us

to wrap our bags when we travel there. Ah, so it is just about people. But I mean, surely, if you can get a knife in to open up the zip, for us to wrap our bags when we travel there. Ah, so it is just about people. But I mean, surely if, if you can get a knife in to open up the, the zip, why can't you,

why can't you just cut through the plastic? I don't understand. It seems like a waste of money to me because the amount of times I have travelled to the US,

actually I said the amount of times, I think it's happened once or twice and I've got a padlock on my zip and they still break it open and put a little leaflet

in there saying that they've looked through our stuff. And in the US they seem to do it with impunity. Yeah. So I'm not sure

if a bit of bag wrapping would stop the American customs officials. Presumably it wouldn't. Well you buy those locks don't you that are able the US, well most security services

can open it because they've got a separate key. It's like a little padlock thing but they've got a little thing that they jam into but then the criminals just get the thing that you jam into it. they've got a separate key. It's like a little padlock thing. Yeah. But they've got a little thing they jam into. But then the criminals just get the thing that

you jam into it. I've got some lovely longchamp luggage. Oh, longchamp, boy. It's got a combination on it. What's your number? Just realised I don't

know what it is. I genuinely have no idea. My gym locker number on my accommodation lock is the same as my first girlfriend's dad's phone number, which is also my internet banking. Wow, that is some pretty deep, deep state security. Yeah, they'll never know.

No one will socially engineer that. No, he's a weird chap. He used to live in Leicester and he was a mechanic. He wasn't the guy who was related to Richard III, was he? No, no. He was a mechanic and he was very... He would be regarded as probably a bit racist nowadays. But he used to collect hats discarded on the side of motorways and stuff.

If you ever saw a hat in the street, you'd stop the car. Who discards hats on the side of the road? I don't know, but he had quite the collection. From cowboy hats to Stetsons to flat caps to ladies' hats. Ladies, just ladies' hats? Just ladies' hats. I mean, that's his story. He could have killed them.

A cowboy hat is a Stetson, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. No, he could have different ones, can't he? A 10-gallon hat, is that a different one? Probably. I think that's just a slang. But he used to have a Cadillac, a pink, I think it was a pink,

a big pink Cadillac, but the problem is he lived out in the sticks in Leicester, and obviously those country roads aren't very wide. No. Can't drive a Cadillac but the problem is he lived out in the sticks in Leicester and obviously those country roads aren't very wide. Can't drive a Cadillac down there. And when my wife's family come and visit they crack up how narrow the roads are here.

They think it's hilarious. It's not the finest thing ever. And the houses as well. Why is it so small? On my road where I live it's one of those roads where there's cars

parked on both sides and sometimes you have to wait and it just blows their mind. I could drive in America. You can just wheel all around the road and nobody really cares. Yeah, exactly. One more email? Do you want to do it? Yeah, I'll drive in America you can just wheel all around the world nobody really cares yeah exactly

one more email do you want to do it yeah I'll do one Josh just basically fortifying for my own mental health and God knows I need to keep hold of

the small amount I've still got every little help hi guys I'm a long time listener to the show first time emailer due to a little thing

called life I've fallen very behind and I've only just finished episode 128 in this episode Pete talks about Amazon having done something to speed up earlier episodes

of The Office US. Oh, yeah. Basically, some episodes, round out season four, it starts to think, it's played at a slightly faster frame rate

and everyone's voices are pitched a little bit higher. Why do they do that, Pete? I haven't got the foggiest clue, Luke. I think it's just, I think it's to fuck up between maybe regions and in America, I think they're 24 frames per second and we're 25 maybe.

Maybe the PAL and NTSC formats. I just don't know. Is it not so that people get through the episodes quicker so they watch more episodes? Nah, why would you do that? You're spoiling it. I'm sorry you're making it higher. It's audibly higher in pitch.

It's just weird. Okay. Yeah, I'm a big fan of both versions of The Office, so I own both sets on DVD. Imagine to my annoyance, the first time I played season one, episode one of The Office US into my DVD player, everyone's voices sounded odd. I turned to my girlfriend, her first time watcher, and said, this isn't right. They sound weird. This has definitely been sped up.

I searched in and found many people with the same problem. The first few seasons have been ever so slightly sped up. As you mentioned on the show at the time, I'm sure this is some sort of compression error, but I was rightly pissed off that they shipped the DVDs like this. Weird. But I thought I was, I couldn't find any reference to it online.

And it was just crazy, man. I was like, I think I'm going mad. You're not. You're not going mad. I'm not going mad because I found Joshua Barnes. Thanks, Josh.

You're the best. I mean, he could just be as mad as you. You never know. Maybe. I definitely heard it, but I feel like now I might have heard're the best. I mean, he could just be as mad as you. You never know. Nearly. I definitely heard it, but I feel like now I might have heard it from you. Episode 128, that's going to be about three months ago. So who knows?

It might just be that I heard it from you. All right. Well, if anyone's got any more light to shed on that, please do so. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com. Apologies to Alex. Didn't get to your email, mate, but I'll try and read it on Thursday

and we will work our way through the rest of the emails when we get the chance. Have a absolutely lovely week. Lovely week. Enjoy the start of April. Spring is here. The clocks have gone forwards. There's extra light in the evenings.

Get yourself out. Put a bit of Luke and Pete show in your earphones and go for a walk or something. We'll be back on Thursday with episode 156. Been a bloody pleasure, hasn't it, Peter? Suck it and try this meal. something we'll be back on thursday with episode 156 been a bloody pleasure hasn't it peter chocolate chinese meal this was a radius to carl production