The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 192: Return of the mercury maze

Episode Date: August 8, 2019

Welcome to your all-new episode of The Luke and Pete Show, in which we talk about possibly the most diverse range of subjects ever. From fridge dumping and courgettes to foreskin removal and UFOs, and just about everything else in between.Meanwhile, Pete crosses the line when talking about masturbation, but Luke gets his own back on Pete regarding the now infamous mercury maze. And, in some absolutely stunning news, Pete announces that he's thinking about abandoning the use of thermal paste in his PC/machine/rig. Staggering.To get in touch about alien abductions, UFOs, thermal paste etc: [e-mail]***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Peloton all-access membership separate. Learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running. I'll tell you about it. All Christian parents want their kids to draw closer to Christ. That's an email we received yesterday. There we go. We can get emails from Mary Kate Warner, who is a Sunday school teacher,

who's made some kind of weird flashcards for her Sunday school, and she wants the world to use them. Share the love. Episode 192. 192, of course, famous for being the number you used to dial on your landline to get directory inquiries. Remember? Was that 192?

I think so, yeah. I thought it was 123, or was that the speaking clock? 123 was the speaking clock, yeah. Imagine what a child... Let me try and do it. At the third stroke, the time sponsored by Accurist will be 2.42 and 10 seconds. That was fascinating because he had to make that exactly 10 seconds. That was fascinating because he had to make that

exactly 10 seconds long. Oh, did he? Because it would update by 10 seconds each time. Oh, I didn't even think of the logistics of that. The time sponsored by Ackerist will be...

His voice is a bit more, not shrill, but crisp. The times... No, it wasn't that. The time sponsored by Ackerist... No. It was definitely deeper. And he would have had to have done

every single combination of numbers 7 53 and 20 seconds yeah it has to be 10

seconds each time and every first day he'll go it is the 13th hour and he'd do a rap he'd do the rap

for ages he was just in there for ages remember club call when you used to ring up your football team yeah I never used to ring up your football team yeah

I never used to do that I used to do it because Newcastle were a buying club back then I don't think they had one for Portsmouth yeah he used to ring up and he used to go

welcome welcome to club call at Newcastle United and play like local hero for a bit and then they'd spend ages sort of going

if you want to learn about the transfers coming in bearing in mind this was run by the if you want to learn about the transfers coming in bearing in mind this was run by the club so they would know exactly who was coming in and coming out

they'd sort of press one you press one and they'd go and the transfers that are supposed to be coming in this summer are Roberto Baggio

and all this stuff and all this bollocks like they'd just make shit up and I'd ring it up massive money grab next to ringing up the Lucasfilm, or LucasArts rather,

help channel when I was having trouble with the old Monkey Islands and the loom. Ringing them up and trying to get some help for the video games there. It was very, very, very time consuming. And also, phone bill destroying as well.

My mum and dad did not enjoy my company. No, I think it was something lucrative like 60p a minute or something. It was ridiculous. When we had that technical issue last week, was it last week or this week? Last week. Yes, okay, right, yeah. This time last week maybe.

Yeah, probably. We talked for quite a lot about a movie that I had seen that strangely for you, Pete, you actually seemed interested in. Right. And then we lost it. So I'm proposing I'm going to bring it to the table again. It was a movie on Netflix called

Unacknowledged. Right. Now it's about UFOs and alien technology. And while I'll concede that it does go down the road of being patently ridiculous at some points, there is some really interesting angles to it. and the main one

being that you know a lot of chat about alien spotted alien spotting and alien technology and alien abduction and all the rest of it are traditionally the bastion of i don't want to be unfair but like it normally is categorized as people who are rednecks in the south of the US or whatever, saying that they've been abducted or whatever. And it's kind of ridiculed chiefly for that reason. Apart from the fact that it's obviously, the chances of it happening are very, very, very slim. So what Unignorance does pretty well is it says, well, do you know what?

There are quite a lot of professional people, including astronauts, pilots, radar people, military people, etc., etc., who have seen these things, have reported these things, have been involved in these things, but it's never really been talked about. And so unacknowledged, I think there's a pretty good job of getting them together and getting to talk about it. And it's people who've walked on the moon and stuff. It's not just anyone. and getting to talk about it. And it's people who've walked on the moon and stuff.

It's not just anyone. And so, although I think it's mad, a lot of it, I wonder if there is a kernel there. Do you not think it's just if you are a pilot and you're flying for 10, 11, 12 hours at a time somewhere and you're sort of dozing off or you're half asleep or you're just not really concentrating on what's going on outside the plane? Well, first of all, you should be because it's important.

Yeah, you should be. But just thinking about it, your mind just kind of does stuff when you're in that kind of emotional stasis. You're just concentrating on one thing and something goes outside. And bearing in mind, there are freak weather effects like ball lightning and St. Elmo's fire and all. Yeah. Aurora Barbaros. Yeah. And the things will be happening above the clouds and you know meteorites and comets and stuff like that things do happen so i'm not saying i'm just saying that

i think we would have more tangible um experiences with with with extraterrestrial life do you want to believe? Mulder. I just think it would all end, wouldn't it? Look at the way that we treat anywhere we go. We just drill into it. Basically, anyone who had alien technology would basically it would be a big hoover and it would just suck up

planets to be processed into minerals that they use up in the cosmos. For those listening, Peter's waving a gigantic hoover around the studio. Imagine a gigantic hoover. It would just suck up the earth and it would just process us and we'd be dead. That'd be bloody miserable. So I do

want to believe, I do obviously know that there's something out there but they're just so far off. I just don't know. They'd just suck us up and use us I think for minerals. They wouldn't care. Use me daddy. Use me. They wouldn't care. Use me, daddy. Use me. They'd hurt us.

Some of those examples of people on pilots seeing these UFOs. Of course, they could be unannounced, unconfirmed technology that we don't know about widely, right? But they've been confirmed by radar people and air traffic control people at the same time. So there's definitely, I want I want to say crafts that are there that are perhaps unannounced,

unclassified technology being tested or whatever. Are you saying that, oh, as in like, so they're military, they're military classified. So the stealth bomber, right, for example.

That was made in the 70s. Yeah. Or something. That's 50 years ago now. So they're obviously. So why not? Why is there not other stuff happening? Oh, of course there is. bomber, right, for example. That was made in the 70s or something. That's 50 years ago now. So why is there not other stuff happening? Oh, of course there is. So what are we saying then?

So that aliens have never been here because people are just testing aircraft and stuff like that? I'm inclined to think that, yeah. Super Concorde. Yeah, I agree with that part. Okay. So yeah,

aliens haven't been here or if they have, they're very hands-off. They've gone to the zoo and looking at the animals. Arthur C. Clarke said it, either we're alone in the universe or we're not, and either way, it's terrifying. Yeah, massively. Again, I think that's more scary,

being alone in the universe, that we're just the only Earth, the only planet that can sustain any kind of like uh life that has independent thought if indeed we do have independent thought which probably gets a bit deeper i'll just you know um i mean more importantly why cliff well in australia one of the top five places to see aliens um basically uh places to see alien how'd they judge that sightings are guaranteed every few days

the holiday park has is that a kangaroo is it someone who doesn't know what a kangaroo is it's an alien it's bouncing everywhere

look at the state of that display they've got that's bad isn't it that's bad do you remember that Jeremy Beadle prank show

Beadle's About right where he crash landed a fake alien in a woman's backyard yes that's right backyard and she ended up the first thing

she said to the alien was would you like a cup of tea yeah would you like a cup of tea there are very

few things that make me happy to be British that drunk I think he's Polish racist Polish man saying

shouting at a black person to get off the train because he's racist and then a bloke going over and

going you are being ridiculous that was amazing that was amazing that makes you proud to be a Londoner and I think something like that that makes

me there's a I find the idea of British identity troubling the best of times but offering an alien a cup of tea is wonderful yeah and the other

thing is it's a tiny little alien as well I mean the size of the cup of tea we're getting onto more familiar Luke and Pete show territory

and people should email in hello at lukeandpete.com maybe they've seen UFOs they can describe the situation yes please maybe they can tell us about going to Nevada

or Area 51 or Groom Lake or anywhere like that but on more sort of terrestrial ground what about this I've found man ordered to collect

fridge he threw off Spanish cliff oh I saw this guy was in Sevilla or something sort of terrestrial ground. What about this I found? Man ordered to collect fridge he threw off Spanish cliff. Oh, I saw this guy. Was it in Sevilla or somewhere? Yeah. Almeria, I think. Police forced a man to retrieve a fridge

he threw down a ravine near the southern Spanish city of Almeria. A tweet posted by the police shows that he had to haul it back up. He was fined 45,000 euros for the trouble as well

made to dispose of it properly. That's a great punishment for someone fly-tipping. He filmed himself. Chucking it off. Chucking it off. It's quite a spectacular video because it really does slide down the hill, doesn't it? It goes miles, yeah.

Yeah, and then of course he had to get it back out somehow. How did they do it? Like a winch or something? It's a long way. I think it's the punishment absolutely befitting the crime. Massively. Well, it's the exact reverse

of the crime and, you know. He had to do it with the help of his friend. They had to carry it up by hand. No, they had a winch, didn't they? I think there's a rope. It's got a rope involved. But I think that's just

to stop it sliding down again. They presumably had a Indiana Jones in there. Yeah. A little Indiana Jones. It's going to be an impending nuclear explosion. Imagine if the police didn't even bother looking inside the fridge and it was just full of body parts.

Full of gold. And it was like they've killed somebody and they've put it in a fridge. Yeah, incredible. Have you ever done any fly-tipping, Pete? No, but I did once run full force into a big fridge that was kind of up on one side in Camden. I jumped into it and basically threw my full force into the fridge and it sort of went on one side in Camden I jumped into it and

basically threw my full force into the fridge and it sort of went down why did you do that? because I was a little oik back in the day and it was it was satisfying though

it was like basically rugby tackling a fridge but from within so a friend of mine at university was getting out to university alcohol fuelled

hijinks and there was two topiary hedge figures in the middle of the town centre. I can't remember what they were doing. Bless you. It might have only been there for a short period of time anyway. He was drunk and he decided he was going to rugby tackle them.

So he ran full pelt into them and rugby tackled them, not realising they were obviously held up with quite severely hard metal and shattered his shoulder doing it. I don't think I like that, Tuffy. No. He's paid the price there. He's paid the price there.

There was also a really, I mean, frankly, quite horrific story that came out on the same day as Fridgegate, which I really enjoyed for terrible reasons of a chap called Terry Brazier. Terry Brazier. Do you know what happened

with Terry Brazier? He went into Leicester Royal Infirmary, your old stomping ground. Stomping ground. Have I ever been there? Yes, I have been there. What for?

I jumped down some stairs and thought I'd really damaged my ankle. Again, an ankle injury. Always the ankle. This was an impact one though. My ankle went up like a right old billy-o. It did.

It was horrible. And what was the prognosis? It was just ice. Diagnosis, sorry. Ice. Elevation. Is it ice? What was the diagnosis?

Like a severe sprain or something? I think I just, yeah, like a compressed sprain kind of jobby. All right. Anyway, so Terry Brazier went into Leicester Royal Infirmary for a routine Botox injection into his bladder. Okay. What do you think happened to him?

Do I have to... I do actually know this story. Oh, come on. Come on. Tell the listeners then. Give them a minute to guess and tell them. He was de-shrouded. Is that a technical term?

No, probably not. Yeah. The fact... I mean, yeah. I think it's... I think the NHS call it a never incident or something. They call it like a thing that should never happen. They need to update that because it has happened.

They removed his penile veil of tears. What are you keeping yours? Pennies? The hospital said it was deeply and genuinely sorry because they accidentally circumcised him. He said after the procedure he was left waiting for two hours

until they broke the news. I mean, hang on a minute, look at your own cock. I mean, two hours, look at your own cock. You'd be wondering,

I mean, presumably it's a non-invasive. What was he getting put in there? Silicon? Botox injection to his bladder. Right. Pete, I'm just saying,

it should not take any person two hours to realise they've been circumcised. Unless it's kind of, I suppose it's probably got anaesthetic and it's probably covered. And it's probably covered. But you would assume,

you would sort of go, this is more invasive than it was because presumably it would just be an injection straight in the bladder, bit of botulism, bang, there we go. But, you know, you would notice,

why is the top of my penis? Would you like it when the... Why have you been farting around with that? That's not my bladder. If you were getting an injection into your bladder, would you like it if the nurse at the time went bang

and the dirt is gone bang is it done kablamo sorry have you done it or not bang I said bang that means it's done

bang bang bang machine gun and this is really British as well the 70 year old man said he replied when they broke the news oh have you what else could I say

I was stunned I couldn't believe they were telling me. Didn't he, did he get, did he have a settlement or something? It was just a derogatory. Yes, that was my next point to you. So you don't know the settlement, do you?

You can't remember. 20 grand? Yeah, it was exactly 20 grand. There's a 20 grand calendar. Why do I always remember these stories and I can't remember my names usually? Can't remember where you put your keys. Can't remember my keys.

Where would you rank that in terms of value? What do you mean? As in 20 grand? No, I'd want more. Foreskin's 20 grand. I'd want more for a foreskin. It's been very good to you over the years. Even if you're 70 years old.

At that age, I'd be like, oh, my penis looks a bit different. Something new, innit? Because everything gets a bit semi at that age, innit? I know what you mean. Suddenly, like, if you're de-shrouded. Oh, got an release of life here. I mean, the act of...

I mean, we do have a lot of American listeners and there'll be a lot of American men without their foreskin. What's that all about, lads? Come on. But would you,

but some people, alright, some of it is religious, even then. No, some of it's for health reasons as well. Some of it's very little though. It's nonsense.

Why are you doing that? It's there for a reason. It's not, we've not evolved it out. It's fine. It's not a gallstone. It's fine, guys are you doing that? It's there for a reason. We've not evolved it out. It's fine. It's not a gallstone. It's fine, guys. Stop making us sound weird

because we're not mutilating ourselves. All right, guys? Yeah? You want more than... I mean, I am sort of inclined to agree with that, I think. But you'd want more than 20. I'd like to have been... I mean, it's horrific.

And obviously, Terry does have my sympathy, of course. On the other hand, this is great frivolous content for a middling podcast. Thank you. He's going to have to take it on the chin. Or the cock. Or the cock. But would you like to have been there

to see the face of the surgeon as he realised that he'd made the mistake? BBC television, Guy Gormer. It would be exactly like that, wouldn't it? Ah! To be honest, out of all of the things you could do, I think it's probably one of the more okay things to do.

Like, you're not removing a leg. You're not removing the wrong leg or all the big things that could happen. A foreskin removal. I mean, you should know what you've got on. Like, I'm terrible at diaries, but I mean, that, just, you know,

instead of, because... It would be interesting to know the process of how that actually happened. Well, exactly, because presumably in the theatre that they're doing it, you know instead of because it would be interesting to know the process of how that actually happened well exactly because presumably in the theatre that they're doing it

they're presumably all of like the forceps and all of like the bits of equipment will be there so the botulism the vial of botulism

will be there most of it was like local aesthetic and the guy and he's awake the whole time and the surgeon just starts fiddling with his penis

he's thinking he's a wrong one I should trust the doctor I should trust the surgeon because you fiddling with his penis. He's a wrong one. I should trust the doctor. I should trust the surgeon because, you know, he knows what he's doing. But at what point do you go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Sorry. What are you doing? Yeah.

And then he just goes, bang. I've started so I'll finish. But yeah, exactly. You would be looking down and sort of seeing him do that kind of care. And you'd be like, this is not normal. Are you going to replace that? That's how you're going usually. You put a fake one on?

Maybe with the botulism it goes down the penis. What is botulism? Botox. It's the little... It's not a disease, is it? It's like a little... You wouldn't go down the cock to get to the bladder, would you? It's a good access point, isn't it?

How would you get down to your bladder, sunshine? I mean, that's why you get a catheter my bladder's been very good to me over the years you put a catheter I'm always very proud of my bladder

I think I've said it before I'll go to my bedroom I'll go to my boudoir needing a bit of a pee and I'll just sleep

straight through yeah to be honest I'm not one of those people even in my advanced in the years who needs to get up in the middle of the night

rarely we both know one person whose life sounds like a real bind. Yeah. Football ramble, gym camp. Yeah.

Constantly urinating that lad. He is, but also, I've got a little trade off with myself. So if I've been drinking, and I'm sat up, I've been drinking. I've got to be doing something the next day.

Yeah. I don't need a hangover. So what I do is I bolt as much water as I can before I go to bed. But I know that I'm probably going to wake I can before I go to bed but I know that I'm probably going to wake up about 3 or 4 so I have to go to the toilet

but I'll take that trade off but ordinarily if I've not been boozing I'm good as gold I drop ibuprofen do you? in advance well no

like at night before you go to bed get ibuprofen paramol if it's a pretty heavy one and you really need to get out the next day. Really? Paramol helps you sleep

because it's codeine baby. Okay. We don't recommend that. I do. It's brilliant. Let's take a break so Pete can drop his paramol and we'll be back in a minute.

What is the charge? Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal? Wonderful. Julian Assange there. We haven't had a Julian Assange update. We have one last week. We have one last week. Wonderful. Julian Assange. We haven't had a Julian Assange update. We have one last week. We have one last week.

I need more Assange. Do people are bored of Succulent Chinese meal guy yet? I don't know. I mean, I'm still very much into it. People keep sending me videos of him, so. Do an email, Peter. I will do an email. Do a bloody email, will you?

Hello at LukeandPeter.com to get in touch, to further aid and abet our misspent adulthood. Have we spoken about this? Because I forget what we had to cast off into space when we lost the emails. Did we do the list of excellent stories of people who

died while masturbating? No, we haven't done that. Hi guys, I've been meaning to send this to you for a while. A couple of completely unrelated things you may be interested in. I imagine one will've been meaning to send this to you for a while. A couple of completely unrelated things you may be interested in. I imagine one will appeal more to Luke and one to Pete.

I'll let you figure out which one is which. A few years ago, a couple of my friends discovered this list of excellent stories

of people who had unfortunately died while masturbating. I thought you might be interested in it. Is this true?

I still remember my favorite tragedy relating to a man who'd fallen in love with his tractor, one who he had named Stone.

Are we vaguely lost around the edges of that at some point um well i mean well so there's no point in really uh going over again but i did very much enjoy the idea if you could fall in love with an inanimate object uh luke what would it be because i i'm a big fan of the electronics and technical um machinery in my life what would it be? Because I'm a big fan of the electronics and technical machinery in my life. What would you sort of go for? That's a really good question. If you had to choose one thing, what means most to you in your life? Probably what means most to me in my life?

Yeah. I would probably say the oversized mason jar that holds the homemade granola that my wife makes. That is very obscure. How would you have sex with that? Why is that even happening? Why? What do you mean?

It wouldn't be like... Not so soon after Terry Brazier. You can't do that. The man might be listening. How would I have sex with a mason jar? In many ways, it's surprising it's taken so long for you to ask me this question. 192 episodes.

You were saying that you would just wrap a lot of wires around your penis. Is that what you're saying? No. I would choose something ergonomically useful. I need to find something that I really, really liked in my life. There's nothing I'm really into. I like machinery. Thermal paste.

Thermal paste. That would sting. That silicon kind of metal. machine paste thermal paste that would sting that silicon kind of metal apparently uh thermal paste isn't the done thing anymore oh go on

this is a massive development liquid mercury or just mercury yeah it's a total yeah I mean it's gonna be

hot so it's gonna be liquid isn't it it's practically a gas meet my friend Mr. Mr. Donaldson people are sort of putting it in their mobile phones and stuff

like that well they're not I mean deviant's on the internet that I watch line up tech tips and stuff but he so how does it work

it's just like it's just a better version of thermal paste there's less resistance but the problem is well it just transfers heat a lot better but the problem is

it's quite liquid so it will get everywhere so what do you how does it I don't even really know how thermal paste works anyway thermal paste is just a heat transfer

so it basically fills in all of the air gaps between the processor or component and the heat sink. You're already yawning. And the aluminium heat sink. And it helps you dissipate heat. So you're going to be upgrading your machine to incorporate that?

Oh, God, no. I actually looked at my processor yesterday. I thought, is this bottlenecking the zero amount of gaming I do every week? And I thought, stop being a fucking idiot, Donaldson. Yeah.

And just get on with the things you have to do. Yeah, what, do you call your computer a machine? Rig, it's the rig, isn't it? It's the rig. You know that.

It's the rig. 87-year-old man found naked and hanging by his belt. The allegedly the oldest victim of an ultra-erotic fatality ever reported.

He was found in his living room naked and bound with ropes that crisscrossed his body from his legs up to his chest invested to get his discovered semen on his right hand as

well as on the floor. At least he finished. It's quite inspirational. 87 though. I mean wowzers. He's still got a load of lead in the pencil at 87.

I mean to each his own if that's what he wants to get up to. Your neck is very fragile at that time though isn't it? He's gone out fighting hasn't he he's gone out fighting there raging against the dying of the light as linton was um this case involves an underemployed

man underemployed uh who grew zucchini in his backyard of his house he shared with his wife one afternoon he desperately knocked on a neighbor's door seeking assistance because he was choking on a zucchini he'd shoved down his throat while masturbating. It was too late to save him. I mean, I didn't expect that to go that way. Don't do it now. Don't mimic it.

I did not expect that. I mean, zucchini... Zucchinis aren't eggplants, are they? No, it's a courgette. So they could actually block the windpipe. Imagine inhaling an entire zucchini. Wow. You just imagined the new series.

Get it long enough so it misses the esophagus. Does it have to go down the esophagus? Which one branches out into the lungs? The trachea. The trachea. Yeah. Can you not just get one long enough to get into the stomach? Because otherwise, it's awful.

It's awful business. It's awful. I think what you're doing is probably erroneously trying to rationalise this. I don't think you need to be doing that. The thing is, it slips out of his hand. I mean, what's going on? Because presumably he's got a firm grip around, well, poor choice of words, but he's got a firm grip around the zucchini as well.

Very strange. Do you want one last one? I don't want any of them. Christian Etchells, remember him? He was a prominent member of the British National Front Party, which is deemed to be some, deemed by some to be fascist and far-right and nationalist. Oh, this is a guy from the BNP?

Yeah. Embarrassing himself. I'm all in favour of that. He'd once been jailed for throwing eggs and shouting racist taunts. In another incident, he was sentenced to a year's worth of community service for threatening an Asian taxi driver with a hunting knife. Seems like a year's bit of community service. Weird.

In August of 2004, at the age of 29, Edgels was found dead in his apartment's cupboard with a cord wrapped around his neck and a picture of a woman dressed as a schoolgirl on the floor. What I would say is, guys, if you're going to get involved with the orthodontic association i know lots of people don't have fixtures in their rooms the only place is the cupboard bit people aren't going to find you mate give yourself the best opportunity do it in a corridor do it get one of those little pull-up bars for the doorway of your house do it get one of those little pull up bars

for the doorway of your house do it in the corridor so people can actually find you if you do it in the cupboard and the doors close you're not going

to be found for days and it's going to be an awful experience for that person an even worse experience for the person who finds you open the cupboard

looking for a I'll just sort his clothes out while he's away you know and all of a sudden you're faced with that so again well they're

going to have to go to the charity shop he doesn't need them anymore. No. There's semen all over them. So yes, I don't think Christian will be missed.

I don't think that's going far and wide. What's the name of the emailer? I've lost it now. It doesn't matter. If you're listening still, never email us again. It was Mike,

Mike. I'm going to not use the second name. It was Mike. Thank you, Mike. Hello at Luke and Peach.com is the email address. Of course, thank you very much for that. I use that term under advice.

This is from Gemma. He says, Hi, guys. Relatively short-term listener. First-time emailer. Nice to see people are still finding the show. Apologies for that, Gemma. Been listening since May when my friend Owen,

long-time listener to The Ramble, introduced me. Binge the entire back catalogue to overtake Owen and get up to date. Demonstrating very competitive. Feel free to get competitive with your iTunes reviews. Yeah,

very much so. In a positive way. Yeah, Luke mentioned Mercury Mazes on a recent show. Mercury Mazes? Remember, I told you I had a maze

with a Mercury thing in it. That's right, and I said that there's no way you could have had it. They're putting them in computers now. That's where all the Mercury went. Pete was horrified that such a toy existed in our lifetimes.

She says, when I was in year five, which is 1994, we'd get treats for earning merit stickers, one of which was half an hour on the Mercury maze. A British primary school in the 90s thought it was okay to let kids play with quite a dangerous toy as a treat. Is that like the 30 seconds, no, two minutes you were allowed on the roof at Chernobyl to get that

graphite off? To get the graphite off, yeah. You get half of it now, that's all you're allowed for the year. I'm actually reading a book about Chernobyl at the moment, because I was really fascinated, this is a bit nerdy, but anyway, I tried watching Chernobyl and I didn't like it. But everyone was saying

it was amazing so I banned it after about 20 minutes because I found the first scene of the first episode really tacky what him killing himself

no sorry wrong the first scene of the meltdown itself in the control room oh right yeah kind of like a bit like an ersatz Star Wars and I

that's what it looked like though hadn't it but I stuck at it and I really enjoyed it and I enjoyed it so much that I bought a book by I think a guy called Sergei

Sergei Plokhin Plokhin I can't remember how you pronounce his name about it's like a it's like a an exhaustive history

of exactly what happened because I was fascinated about what artistic license they took and what actually went on it's very very similar yeah

it's just like Voices of Chernobyl or something like that. That's what they based a lot of it on. Chernobyl Dream is a different one. This one's just called

Chernobyl, I think. Chernobyl Prayer, sorry, not Chernobyl Dream. Chernobyl Prayer. I've got that as well but I haven't read it yet. Anyway, back to Gemma who, as far as I'm concerned

or as far as I'm aware, was not indicted or anything to do with the Chernobyl disaster. Mind you, this was also the same teacher, the teacher who let them play with the mercury maze

for half an hour as a treat, whose idea of a science experiment was to fill plastic bags with gravel to see which supermarket had the strongest bags by weighing them on a co-traction

made from a hanging scale. That's good. Similar to the one that's used to weigh babies at two A-frames and a balance beam from the gym equipment. I can't remember

which supermarket won, and safe to say it wouldn't be on the agenda today in our war against plastic. A couple of other things. On a very early episode, you mentioned smart speakers and referred to Alexa. During this conversation,

my smart speaker started playing Hotel California by the Eagles as a result of something you've said. I've also asked Alexa to play the show, and she tried to play me something called Utter Drivel which I thought might make you proud

love the show it brightens up my Mondays and Thursdays yeah it's worth reminding people that you can actually listen to us on the old smart speakers

just tell us tell it to play Luke and Pete Shaw Alexa tell us how Michael Hutchence died Alexa play

Gary Glitter my gang that's on your history now oh I can't get rid of that naughty hopefully you got your electron incognito mode giving him a fucking

bit of PRS there oh yeah ridiculous funding his lifestyle yep exactly but yeah so Alexa play the lost prophets

that's enough that's enough that won't be on there he got in trouble because he sneaked he had a mobile phone up his bum oh right you know those tiny little mobile got in trouble because he sneaked he had a mobile phone up his bum you know those tiny

little mobile phones you get because he was bothering one of his exes you'd think he'd just leave well enough alone wouldn't you

he's even 35 years isn't he or something yeah the things he did yeah he said that it was the wing's mobile phone

and he was keeping it for solidarity with his wing of the thing. But those tiny little mobile phones that you can fit on people's bums. Very exciting. Great way of... Is it exciting? It's very exciting, too, of technology.

It's very exciting. This is Ian Watkins, is that his name? Watkins, yeah. When's he going to get out of prison? Never. I don't think he'll ever get out of prison. I mean, his crimes were... Unspeakable.

Fucking unspeakable. Yeah, okay. Even for this show. Yeah, that is saying something you did in the chair, Donaldson. Let's wrap it up, Pete, on that note. It's been a disgracefully risque episode, even by your standards. Well...

Do we apologise for that or do we celebrate it? No, fuck off. We're back on Monday with episode 193. We hope you have a lovely, lovely weekend. Go out and enjoy yourself. If you want to email us in the meantime about anything we talked about,

UFOs, alien experiences, abductions, all that kind of stuff, it's hello at lukeandpetecher.com. But you're welcome to get in touch with us for any reason.

Indeed. Pete, I won't be seeing you this weekend. Oh, where are you going? Nowhere. We just don't see each other at the weekend. Okay.

I'm off to Rotterdam. Enjoy. Could be anywhere. Frankly, my dear, I don't Rotterdam This has been a Stakhanov production On each step with Peloton From their pop runs to walk and talks

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