The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 199.66: Wet mouth

Episode Date: October 31, 2019

Which celebrities have the wettest mouths? Tune in to today's Luke and Pete Show to find out. It's a bizarre subject to discuss but Pete is really passionate about it, and so here we are. Elsewhere, we take in the best and worst budget hotels, talk about Christmas sandwiches and get an update on Eamonn Holmes.There's also plenty of your stories too, which you can email in on [e-mail] a great weekend!***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

give my regards to luke and pete street it's the luke and pete show with me pete donaldson and mr luke moore what's your favorite tube station luke oh now you're asking there's one in east lond London which is, I think it was done as a tribute to sort of communist architecture. Right. I forget which one it is now.

It's on the central line and it's got amazing lanterns, like lamps going all the way down. It's beautifully decorated inside. Oh, there's a few of them. Yeah, they've still got those kind of original

kind of 1940s lamps. Beautiful. In terms of efficiency, if we're talking London Underground, this is very parochial but fair enough. The Victoria line is the MVP. his lamps, beautiful. In terms of efficiency, we're talking London Underground, this is very parochial, but fair enough.

The Victoria line is the MVP. I mean, that is unbelievably good. It's very efficient, isn't it? It cuts right through town. There's a bit of a hack at Piccadilly Circus. I always used to walk up to Oxford Circus. Piccadilly Circus,

up the Bakerloo line. You don't have to worry about getting on escalators or stairs. Right over the way, crossover, northbound Victoria line. You don't have to worry about getting on escalators or stairs. Right over the way. Crossover. Northbound Victoria Line. My mate Sarah told me about that.

And it has changed my life. Certainly coming into this studio anyway. Two facts for you that makes the Victoria Line the MVP. Okay. One is Victoria to Highbury, which is South London, South Central London to North London in 12 minutes. And the second one is rush hour on

the Victoria line. They've got it so good now there's a train every 40 seconds. That is the cool bomb. That is cool.

Tried that flick but I couldn't really do it in the mic. Hang on. There you go. What are you doing with you? You're cracking like

your two fingers together there. Hit that finger into that finger. Oh. Yeah. Pete here's a story that caught my eye this week and I hope people are having a were you? You're cracking like your two fingers together there. Hit that finger into that finger. Oh. Yeah. Pete, here's a story

that caught my eye this week and I hope people are having a lovely week and if they're not this will make them feel better. Did you know

about the existence of the Juliet Club? What's the Juliet Club? So, the Juliet Club is... This sounds a bit like it might be

Romeo and Juliet law kind of situation. It's based in Verona in Italy and a tradition that spans a very long time, at least decades. The Juliet Club receives 50,000 letters every year. Right. Many addressed to just Juliet, Verona, Italy. Cool.

And there are a lot of volunteers who are called the Secretaries of, who respond to every letter that's sent with the same style that it was sent to them on. And the idea is that in Verona, there's a place where people go and visit as tourists, which is called the Juliet balcony, where it's apparently inspired when Juliet came out and said, Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo? And there's a really interesting article in the BBC about it,

about these volunteers who take their time to sensitively and carefully and really creatively reply to people's almost like agony aunt type problems around love. So all you've got to do is write on the envelope

Juliet Verona Italy and it gets sent there and you'll always get a response. Would you necessarily take the advice of a woman who drank poison? I don't think it's, but they're not posing as Juliet

I'm just saying I wouldn't be writing to her in the first place love me love me say that you love me awful awful

what do you think about that Peter I think that would you be my Romeo I reckon it would be better to write to us because we are

experts in the matters of the heart if not pieces of electronics that go in hearts that my dad gave me once. Yeah, exactly. The old pacemaker. We'll send you a pacemaker. If you want to send your love problems to Luke

and or Pete, hello at lukeandpete.com. Do it. We won't write you back a painstakingly written typewriter letter with perfume on it. No. Which is what some of these guys do but I thought it was a really interesting story because the

whole story on the BBC website was around a guy called Martin who found out at the age of 14 that he had a brain tumour and thankfully he

was able to sort of overcome that and survive and he just thought you know what I'm going to spend my time doing nice things for people. Okay. So he volunteered doing that,

and he's been doing it for a long time. That's nice. Sometimes it'll be like, oh, my name's Luke, and I'm in love with this guy called Pete, but I'm too scared to tell him. And you reply going, mate, wind it in.

I had a brain tumour at 14. Yeah. Get some fucking perspective. Every single response. Well, at least you have a brain tumour like me. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, photo of him had a brain tumour at 14. Yeah. Get some fucking perspective. Every single response. Well, at least you have a brain tumour like me. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, photo of him with a brain tumour. Sent back.

Yeah, there we go. I just thought that was quite interesting. That is quite interesting. But if I was a member of a rather less progressive government, I'd say, get rid of it immediately. Which they've volunteered anyway. Oh, right. I've told you that.

You haven't got to turn everything into a right-wing political rant, Peter. Well, I'm right-wing and I'm political, so what are you going to do about it? What are you going to do? Can we do... Go on, you carry on.

Morrison's have released a Christmas sandwich and it's a mince pie sandwich and it doesn't look very nice. No, I'm not here for that. Come on. 5th of November. That looks horrible.

It looks like it's got cheese and, I mean, presumably... Is it mince as in mince? Yeah. Because, I mean, you wouldn't put cheese in the middle of an actual sweet mince pie, would you? Yeah. Because I mean you wouldn't put cheese in the middle of an actual sweet mince pie

would you? No. Disgusting. I remember it took me a while to realise that my American friends didn't know what a mince pie was and they thought it was savoury

and that's why they kept saying they didn't want one. Until I eventually went no it's sweet. I'd kind of want one more if it was savoury to be quite frank. I would say to them

after dinner or whatever do you want a mince pie? I brought some. And they would go well no we just had dinner. So no not really want a mince pie? I brought some. And they would go, well, no, we just had dinner. So, no, not really. The mince pie sandwich costs £3 and is made with two cheeses

and spiced fruit chutney. That sounds all right. I mean, it can't... I'd want more spice than sweet, to be honest. Horrible. Disgusting. The Pret Christmas sandwich is back on the 5th of November, isn't it?

Always a big moment. Yes, the Pret Manger sarnies obviously excite when they come out. When's that? November? November 5th, I believe. Right. Yeah, so there's a bit of time to wait. November the 5th has come and gone, but the thoughts of it still linger.

I held a firecracker in my hand. Has anyone seen my finger? Spike Mulligan. Very good. Is that Monday? I think it's Monday, isn't it? The 5th of November? Holy crap, yeah, I think it is. The 2 Monday I think it's Monday isn't it the 5th of November holy crap

yeah I think it is the 2nd maybe it's Tuesday maybe it's Tuesday I like the I mean for those people who aren't living in London or indeed a major city

this won't be I mean you might have visited and seen the Christmas sandwich but if you ever go to Pret do get the Christmas sandwich it's a great sandwich it's just a great sandwich when all is said and done

it's just a great sandwich it's a great sandwich you know we've been because we've it's just a great sandwich. It's a great sandwich. You know, we've been, because we've been doing this Ramble tour, and we're almost at the end of it now, obviously, but we're on the home stretch, but we got to stay in hotels, right? I've found out that Malmaison hotels, of all the budget hotels, are by far the best.

Are they technically a budget hotel? They're good. I wouldn't rate that as a budget hotel. That's a decent hotel. they technically a budget hotel? They're good. I wouldn't even, I wouldn't rate that as a budget hotel. That's a decent hotel. What's your budget hotel then? Ibis?

Yeah. Premier Inn? Yeah. Premier Inn Town. We've done the kind of like City or something. Yeah, any of those ones. Yeah.

Because there was a, there was a recent. Easy Hotel. There was a recent. I think Budget Hotel never has a minibar, never has snacks, and the hotels that we've stayed in, by and large, have had both of those things.

And I have indulged. I have as well. I have eaten the spicy nuts. Do you ever sort of find that when you're talking to somebody that you don't know about food or anything like that, and they make a comment about it you feel a bit a bit violated

why because I said he said do you have anything in the minibar and I said I've had the spicy nut mix and she went oh they are spicy

they're great them aren't they and I was like mind your own business fuck off yeah check later and charge me I don't want you to hear

what I'm doing my pants on the bed I'm like that's my food I don't like it when I come in the room with some food and everyone starts eyeing it up if I'm doing my pants on the bed I'm like that's my food I don't like it when I come in the room with some food and everyone starts

eyeing it up if I'm in an office situation and I come in with a bit of dinner and they go and Peter starts looking at it and going oh that looks nice fuck off

remember Michael Owen did it when I walked past him at Euston station he eyed up my dinner fuck off Michael get your own dinner he probably said it's too spicy

yeah but I found this article here for it's from 2017 but i'm fairly certain it was done um in 2019 as well and um the fifth year running britannia hotels was named the worst hotel chain in britain by readers of consumer magazine which um travel lodge are in their holiday in are in their premier in there so i mean malmaison isn't even in there i like the um video that they try and, I think they started in 95 or 94.

I watched a promotional video and some of the information went in. Well, I was waiting for my kit to get cut slash reprogrammed and it was going, we put hotels in

converted prisons and brothels. I was like, do we need to know that? It's taking a turn. This hotel ranking system I'll convert it back. For budget hotels

was average price paid for a one night stay cleanliness quality of bathroom sorry quality of bedroom bathroom bed comfort and how well

the description of the hotel matched the actual experience. Number one was Premier Inn number two was Ibis then Radisson Blue then Crowne Plaza then McDonald I've Inn. Number two was Ibis. Then Radisson Blue. Then Crowne Plaza. Then McDonald. I've never heard of McDonald.

Then Ibis Styles. And then Holiday Inn Express. And then Novotel. Mel Maisel's not on the list, so maybe you're right. We just must be very lucky. I didn't think for one second they'd let us stay in a nice hotel.

It's actually decent. I worry. I worry about the finances. What's my worst? I'm trying to think what my worst hotel was. Yeah. Hotel Ibis. The budget one in Fratton.

Oh, God. That's a while you haven't been there. There's no need to be there. That was like, if I'm ever going to top myself, it'll be in there. I mean, it was just grim. The confusing thing about that, Pete, is if you know the area in Portsmouth, there's no need to be there. If you're going to stay at a hotel in Portsmouth and you want to do it on the budget,

you don't need to stay in Fratton. 33 quid though. That is cheap to be fair. That is cheap. That's probably the cheapest you're going to find actually. What are you looking for in a budget hotel then? Because I don't really care to be honest. No, I don't care.

As long as it's got, I guess, a shower. But I mean, even then, it's just... Better than a shower. Just location, location, location. Is it? Yeah, just location location location is it yeah just location so you want to be right in the centre

yeah just whenever why are you fratting then whenever you go on holiday as long as you can just you know as long as you're just

kind of in amongst it I don't really mind to be honest but I'm getting in a bit early like by about probably about five hours or something before you guys get

to New York and oh god American New to New York. And American, New York City hotels are insanity. Yeah. Very expensive. Very expensive. If you're starting to worry about the budget peak, then that is definitely

a very, very bad sign. I'm just looking for a bed. You don't really spend an awful lot of time in your hotel room, do you? So bed, shower, obviously... Telly? Do you like a telly? Well, Malmaison's got Sky Sports. Has it? It's unbelievable. I couldn't believe it.

It's the first hotel I've ever been in. Why aren't we being advertised? Why aren't we taking their dollar? This is a great advert for the Malmaison Hotel. It's in every major city. I should have named him. I might get Charlie to bleep it out. If you want to un-bleep it.

This could be you, but you're playing. Give us some money. Yeah, brilliant. One other thing I wanted to bring to the table, Pete Donaldson, is,

check this out, right? The world's most expensive whiskey was sold. A rare bottle of Scotch whiskey hit the headlines after it was sold for 1.45 million million at auction in London. It was the Macallan 1926 60-year-old single malt from Cask 263.

Apparently, according to Sotheby's, or Sotheby's as most people call it, it's the holy grail of whiskey, but it's £50,000 a dram. But then the BBC, this is from the BBC website, right? They obviously have some kind of agenda here because they report on it. And then they spend the second half of the article saying that they gave it to David Robertson, who's a master distiller at the Macallan,

saying, from memory, it was an incredibly rich, intense spirit full of dried fruits, dates, prunes, tons of incredible spicy notes of cloves, ginger and cinnamon. It's a great whiskey, but I've had better. Stick in the boot

right in there. It's a pain in the arse, isn't it? Would you reckon you'd be able to tell if it was a really amazing whiskey? Nah, I think over a certain age of anything, I think it's the law of diminishing returns. And they also end up a limit. If it's like, oh, this whiskey is 100 years old, well, that's gone rotten, isn't it?

Disgusting. Oh, so you mean, so you think it might, once it goes so far, it's not going to be any good. Yeah, but I would like to point out, I am not a master distiller.

If I gave you, say, a 10 pound bottle of red wine, a 100 pound bottle of red wine, and a 10,000 bottle of red wine, would you tell a difference?

Probably not. No, I don't think I would either I'm not an expert in it though imagine there was a story in Hawksmoor

that steak restaurant a few weeks ago or was it a few months ago I can't remember where the waiter or the sommelier whatever it was

he gave this couple the wrong bottle of wine and they asked for like a 60 pound bottle or whatever it was a 10 grand bottle of wine yeah and um they asked for like a like a 60 pound bottle or whatever it was a hot it was a 10 grand bottle of wine don't buy it is that a pr that's a pr kind of exercise i think you mentioned it on the show and somebody pointed out that you know if you're

buying a bottle of wine over a grand they are they would usually have someone come over like a specialist come over to explain the the wine and where it's come from and why it tastes like this and how you should be drinking it. It's a whole fucking ceremony, isn't it, after you get to a certain level. I'm not interested in that.

It sounds a bit like when they come over. Get it down, me gullets. It sounds a bit like when they come over and sing you happy birthday. It's the last thing I want. I just bother,

I bother some, it's only come in recently, bother some restaurant staff. It's just like, come on I'm going to tip you anywhere I'm a kind man yeah

you don't have to earn it it's fine do you tip room service people when they come to the door well yeah because nothing's cash they give you a little piece

of paper to sign and you add a little do you do you always add yeah do you it's room service they literally carry it

because you can't be asked to get downstairs and do it yourself but I would do if they say it's ready now come get do it yourself. Well, I would do. If they say it's ready, now come get it, I'll go get it.

I would. All right. Well, bully for you. But what's the... I'm not... I hope you would agree. I'm not an ungenerous man. Right. But why...

Say, for example, I'm standing in room 223. Yeah. It's up one flight of stairs and it's just down the corridor from the kitchen. Why am I paying someone to walk 20 paces to the door?

You'd say that about waiters, though, couldn't you? The waiters are giving you a whole service across an evening. Is it? Bringing staff, explaining stuff, being nice to you, taking your plates away. There's a lot more involved. Yeah, but, I mean, they've got to come to your room and see you. In my case, I might sandwich at 3 a.m. in a towel um topless so and i and it was fine because the

block i couldn't figure out it was a man or a lady and uh the and if it was a woman obviously i would go and put a top on but i couldn't figure out it was a man because because he wasn't right in my little um peeky hole um but he did have quite an effeminate voice and so i couldn't really figure it out it's like fuck it it's 3am I don't you know if you're knocking on Donnie's door at 3am

you're checking out the nipples I'm afraid glass cutting nipples no glass cutting nipples they are relentless so what would you give as a tip then

couple of quid I think I had a 15 pound sandwich which is obscene obviously but I think I gave a 3 quid tip bloody hell

and what about if a delivery driver drops you a Deliveroo Deliveroo is 15 pound sandwich, which is obscene, obviously. Yeah. I think I gave three quid to it. Bloody hell. And what about if a delivery driver drops you a Deliveroo? Deliveroo is, um, every 10 pound, it's a pound for me. Like 10% in it. So like,

In cash? No, you got to take it to your app. I've got Deliveroo, um, premium anywhere because I order so many times. It is disgusting.

What does that mean? It just means you don't pay any delivery. How'd you get that? You pay 10 quid a month, which is, which is disgusting. What does that mean? It just means you don't pay any delivery. How do you get that? You pay 10 quid a month, which is worth it for me, because I am relentless. That's one of the most depressing things you've ever said to me. What do you mean? How many takeaways are you ordering a month?

Upwards of four or five. A month? Yeah. That's all right. That's not too bad, actually. It's too bad. No, fair enough. There was a big thing, wasn't there, recently about,

I mean, because you are a man who cares about the worker Comrade Donaldson we call you. Have you got any issue with Deliveroo kind of allegedly encouraging people to get out on their bikes

in all weathers to try and make money because they can't afford to not work? I mean isn't that gig economy? Gig culture? You're using it mate.

Well I do. Well you can't sort of say it's like the people who complain about do you see that video of Michael Gove from 1992 I'm not trying to

swerve away from but this clip of Michael Gove from 1992 going through David Attenborough's bins because he was on

some TV show and he was like well let's see let's see if is he Scottish Michael Gove? Yeah he's but he's posh Scottish

let's see if he has that's not posh Scottish anyway Let's see if he is a fair-weather friend of the earth or not. It's just him on a roof going through Sir David Attenborough's bins. And it's like the people who sort of point out, oh, you're involved in capitalism, but you wanted to end. That's very interesting, isn't it? That's a stretch. You're taking part in

gig culture but you think that workers should have more rights. Disgusting. I don't think he is posh. I think he's got a posh Scottish accent but I think he's from a working class background, Michael Gove. Regardless of that. He's got a wet mouth and it won't stop dribbling.

Pete, what are the current wet mouth power rankings? Robbie Savage is always in there. Robbie Savage is up there, yeah. Robbie Savage is constantly streaming. Gove's up there. But you can actually see it glisten. Explain to people what you mean by the wet mouth. People who just constantly have wet mouths.

But how does it manifest itself? Well, in... In rubbish savages. But your mouth is supposed to... It's just because you go... But people listening will be thinking people's mouths

are supposed to be wet. Yeah, but it's just... Oh, too wet, you mean? Too wet. Over wet. Michael Gove has a shiny lip all the time.

Right, right. And we're not talking like lip gloss. He's just got a very wet mouth. Like he's constantly salivating at subjugating workers' rights and ruining people's lives. He can't believe how lucky he is that this idiot of a man has managed to get himself into a position where he can make the world a worse place.

And he... It's delicious his whole life is delicious yeah he's always salivating he just can't believe it's like when I look at the crisps

in a corner shop and I think god I can't yeah speaking of I shouldn't mention political stuff anyway even though we did it

earlier this week as well because we got a comment on the iTunes page I forget that we got iTunes reviews and I actually looked on I think for the Ramble, I was like, Jesus Christ you got a lot of reviews over the years. Wow.

This is a good one. It started well but has slowly become a record of Luke's movement into middle age slash middle class gammonhood. Yes. Which is actually strangely accurate. I'm sure that is probably true. Every time you criticise me you sound a bit more like Gov. But that's the problem, see. I criticise you because I think it's interesting

to kind of challenge you on your beliefs. But I think then people imply that then my beliefs are somewhat different. I'm not saying they necessarily are. Yeah, but you kind of, you opt out. You just don't want to be part of the conversation. You don't get angry about anything anymore. No.

As I said to you on Monday, I'm a Ted Cruz guy. I don't believe human beings should be allowed to masturbate. I really must talk about the book of dreams Argos catalogue in the next show

do it on Monday we'll take a break and we'll be back with some emails what you guys have sent in here we go

so Sheikh you're telling me that drinking camel's urine is part of the din don't get me wrong look that man

has been misrepresented. In his time in the Ecuadorian embassy. In his time in the Ecuadorian embassy. He thinks you should be drinking camel urine. Ach, you don't get me wrong. Hello at LukeandPeach.com is the email address. Now, I've got this email from Ivan that I'd like to read to you

because it is a follow-up on Eamon Holmes. Oh! Give people a quick pricey catch-up. Apparently, I like hot oranges. So, Eamon Holmes, according to a friend a quick pricey catch up. Apparently I like hot oranges. So Eamon Holmes according to a friend of Pete's.

warmed up in a microwave. I like a hot orange. He likes to eat hot oranges. Sounds dangerous. Perilous. I've never heard of anyone doing that before. But anyway,

Ivan says, just wanted to follow up with regards to discussion about Eamon Holmes eating habits. It interested me to hear in episode 199.62 he eats hot oranges

because I've also witnessed him being odd with the food and the drink. I spotted him at a bar at the O2. My friend and I saw that he was drinking a pint of Peroni that was full of ice. We thought this was pretty odd

and perhaps he had been drinking a Coke slash water and his friend had shared the pint with him to explain why he had ice in his pint. We were horrified, though, to see that when he ordered the second pint, he specifically asked for a pint of Peroni full of ice. This is blatantly deviant behaviour and has put me off him as a TV personality since.

Perhaps he was cooling his mouth after a hot orange. Cheers, Ivan. Now he had a burnt tongue. What do you make about that? Peroni with an ice cube in it. Come on. Come on now. That's fooling.

Quit fooling. I think he's saying that it's like a whole pint glass was full of ice. So you only get half a pint there, max. Well, I guess it would,

I mean, maybe he's trying to reduce his consumption by filling his glass full of ice and then filling it with a Peroni. That's a good idea. Yeah, it would look

like a pint, but you would obviously get a very watery pint by the end of it. But would it make you drink your Peroni even quicker it wouldn't taste very nice

would it I don't really like Peroni anyway it only starts to get watery after a while surely when it starts to melt

but yeah very weird people do it with Magnus weird behaviour do it with Cylas don't they very fashionable in the summer to do it

with Cylas with ice I never drink Cylas I think they are disgusting it's because you have a problem with ciders don't they very fashionable in the summer to do it with ciders on ice I never drink ciders I think they are disgusting it's because you have a problem with your acid isn't it yeah

I get that with lagers anyway I used to adopt the old policy of just eat whatever I want and just chuck a gaviscon down after

yeah chase it with a gaviscon is that what you call a gaviscon chaser yeah but it does

play havoc with the poop poops and thanks for sending that in. If anyone else has got any stories of celebrities, or even minor celebrities, doing weird things with food, then please do let us know.

Hello at LukeandPeach.com. It reminds me of that story of John Hartson. Right. John Hartson, former forward for Arsenal and West Ham and Celtic. Apparently used to be a big fan of a, I'm going to say Harvester restaurant in Hertfordshire somewhere.

And on a Sunday, he used to famously go in there and bang two full roast dinners. That's good, isn't it? I mean, he's a big lad. We've all had a meal where we thought I could eat that again. Yeah.

But rarely have any of it. It's never going to be, you know, it's like Trentinspotting 2. It'll be a parody of the first one. Do you think

it's much like Trainspotting he was just trying to chase the high of the first row. Exactly. Massively.

Sorry I just spotted a Chronicle tweet saying after the game Steve Bruce suggested that his team had been

conditioned to defending for too long under Rafa Benitez. Fuck off Steve. Fuck it. I saw him try and take credit for Martin de Gravka the other day as well. too long, Durafa Benitez. Fuck off, Steve. Fuck it. I saw him try and take credit for Martin de Gravca the other day as well.

It's like, didn't Benitez sign him? He's like, we've unearthed a real gem here. Unearthed a real gem? What, you walked into training and he was standing on the pitch? Fucking hell, brilliant, well done. I've unearthed a real gem. Look, the vending machine has what it has in there, Steve, to be honest. Good lad. I just want a hot orange.

I just want a hot orange I just want a hot orange Hello to Ant in Alicante Pleasingly alliterative Oh it's Ant again, he's always emailing Well I was on the cross chain at my gym this afternoon When I heard you read out my email about the staircase in El Camino You remarked that I must be a very angry person

To fire off such a rant about a MIA TV show Now I would bet I don't remember anything I've done in the past, I would bet that Luke was the one who said that comment, and not me. I'm just saying, Ant's emailing a lot at the moment, and I'm reading them all out. I laughed at the time,

but when I got home, I played the excerpt back, and I found myself dismayed, and even a bit upset, that I should come across like that. I'm not really an angry person at all, and if ever you should come out to this part of the world, I'd be very happy to buy you both a beer

show you what a beautiful area this is and generally disabuse you of this idea you've got of me due to a couple of facetious emails. This is getting a bit weird

mate. He also says Kieran Culkin in the TV show Succession looks like me. I've had that a few times and it's yeah it's not great.

Yeah and don't worry about it man it's all good. We're all good. There's no beef. But can I, I mean, the lookalikes thing

with you and Kieran Colkin, I mean, because the character he plays reminds me of you as well. He's got a little body as well. Yeah. He hasn't got much of a bum. He wears slightly

similar clothes to what I wear. Same hair, same clothes, deviant behaviour. But, what? I was just about to say, I'm getting angry really quickly.

I got angry in boots. Did you? I was just about to say I'm getting angry really quickly I got angry in boots did you I was at the front of the queue what happened for the self service there was one open and I was I had my headphones on

so you know when you're not I can't imagine you getting angry in public you're kind of 20% you're so polite you're kind of 20% 20% head on something else

so you probably weren't paying much attention but I was convinced Luke and I'm still convinced, that it was my turn next at the self-service. It was dinner time, so it was quite busy. I had some Shentrum.

Don't forget your Shentrum. Three jars of Shentrum and a shower gel, and I was buying it. And I walked over to the next available, and this blog just kind of pushed in front of me. Right. It sort of gave me a, no, I'm next kind of like shake of the head. Right.

I went from zero to 100% angry. What did you say? I just went, well, no, I didn't because I was concentrating on a podcast at the time. I wasn't 100% sure that it was definitely my next goal, but I'm struggling to see where that guy might have come from. Yeah. Because I was definitely at the front of the line so I went really angry

and I thought about it an hour later and I was like no I'm still really angry and then we were at the Ramble tour in Leeds, me and the rest of the Ramblers, I think you'd gone off ahead crossing a road, this car we were on the left hand side of the road, he was driving down the right hand side of the road so we were never going to meet and he just stopped in front

of me and I went... I shouted through his window, just keep on driving, you twat! What? I don't know where that came from! I don't know where that came from! Where's this coming from? And to be fair,

he drove on, that twat drove on. I've never... I never get that angry. Did you feel powerful? I was a bit excitable it's quite seductive isn't it

oh my I went a bit road ragey keep on driving you twat squat I'm trying to stop using you know

female genitalia I was gonna say in other cultures there isn't the attitude of queuing that perhaps we have in the UK right so maybe the guy

was just like oh whatever so you're saying he's a fucking foreign is that what you're saying In other cultures, there isn't the attitude of queuing that perhaps we have in the UK, right? So maybe the guy was just like, oh, whatever. So you're saying he's a fucking foreign. Is that what you're saying? Fucking foreign, eh? I'm saying that London's a very cosmopolitan city. And they may not have the same attitude towards queuing as you do. But I mean, it's presumably the queue is, you know, there's a little passageway for people to sort of go in.

But I'm just worried I've become a monster, Luke. Swearing it, swearing it, motorists. Yeah, I had a moment a while back I tell you which is embarrassing but I'll tell you anyway I'm not going to name any names

I was at a place of work and I think it's because I hadn't been to the gym this week maybe yeah got roid rage got roid rage

I was at a place of work and I was just a bit late for something I had to go and do something and I was running a bit late which is unlike me but anyway I was it's my fault and I went in and as I had to go and do something and I was running a bit late, which is unlike me. But anyway, I was. It's my fault.

And I went in and as I went in, someone really unnecessarily, and it is a colleague, I wouldn't say I know him that well, but it is a colleague, they went, oh, as a joke,

oh, you fancy doing it and do your kind of thing as in like taking the piss that I was late. I don't know why I did this, but I just sort of went, oh yeah, good one, and carried on walking,

but like in a really aggressive way. Oh, nice. I felt kind of went, oh yeah, good one, and carried on walking, but in a really aggressive way. Oh, nice. I felt kind of bad afterwards. You have been working in that building too long, Sunshine. No, it wasn't a junior member of staff, really. It was a colleague. It's not like... What are you saying, mate? Mr. Billy

Big Balls? Would you consider me as an angry person? Because you are, but you are a very contained burst of anger in plight company kind of guy. You're not angry in public.

No. You're more of a brooder, I'd say. I don't lose my temper, though, do I? No, not really. I'm passionate. And you're a

rumbling. I think that's why you're such a hit with the ladies and the men, because you're like a Mediterranean passionate kind of guy. I am.

But back in... When the guys said, oh, you look like Kieran Culkin, you do and it's a good lookalike for a number of different reasons. But the problem is I've got Pete Donaldson lookalike fatigue now.

So many people look like you. It's exhausting. It doesn't really register on my radar. No. I don't get as excited about it. No. Let's squeeze one more email in very quickly. This is from Vinny who says,

hi guys, I'm a primary school teacher. I have confiscated some rather unusual items. And we talked about this a while back, so I guess Vinny's on the catch up. He says,

one of the most memorable moments was seeing a group of children huddling around the cloakroom laughing, giggling, and throwing something around.

Because they're only in year one, which is ages four to five, Adorable. I thought it was a toy. It was a toy, but one child had brought in his mum's rampant rabbit and was using it as a lightsaber. Less adorable.

Less adorable. It was the most interesting conversation I've had with that parent, and they've never spoken to me again. I also walked past the toilets where you need to hold your breath. However, usually, he says, usually you need to hold your breath. This time, all I could smell was cotton candy and five children who were aged

seven years old were vaping in the bathroom. Oh, that's fantastic. Thanks very much for the show. Keeps me entertained on my very long

commute to work. I mean, rampant rabbits and vapes in infant school, primary school, not what we're after. Not ideal,

but why do they call it a rampant rabbit? You don't want something that's rampant near your nevers, do you? I think it's just a brand name, mate. Yeah, I know, but still. Just a brand name, brother. Yeah, I was just saying, it's just like, I like, did you ever see that video of the kids in the mum and dad's bedroom with the, what can I describe it as, big, long, double-ended dildo? No.

Sort of waving it around like it was a sort of fun... The kid was saying, funny sausage, funny sausage. Oh, goodness. And he was like, whapping it around. His parents have filmed that. And they put it on the internet. Well, yeah, because it is fucking brilliant.

And the dad... It's like Ricky Gervais saying when that kid fell into that gorilla enclosure. Was that...? And the parents were filming it. Yes, yes, yes. Why are you filming it? Is this going to be...

No, it's been removed by... It's been removed for violating YouTube's terms of conditions, which sounds ridiculous. So that's a Ben Shapiro. I know, right? But yeah, it's just a kid who's found his mum's dildo. Bunny sausage! Bunny sausage!

And the dad is not taking it off him because he he is incapacitated by laughter his dad is laughing my goodness me and the mam's come in it is funny

it's that wonderful moment where the kid realises that the parent really wants the thing that's in their hand so they're not going to give it up so they're not going to give it up yeah exactly

funny sausage so if you found a funny sausage underneath your mam and dad's bed The parent really wants the thing that's in their hand. So they're not going to give it up. So they're not going to give it up. Yeah, exactly. Funny sausage. If you found a funny sausage underneath your mum and dad's bed, do get in touch. And if it was frozen, Pete probably would have eaten it. Hello at lucopeacher.com, of course. We will see you on Monday. Have a lovely weekend.

By the time the Monday show comes out, we'll be in New York City. So we're pre-recording it. We might try and do one from the US next week. That'll be lots of fun. Have a great weekend. We'll see yourecording it. We might try and do one from the US next week. That'll be lots of fun. Have a great weekend. We'll see you soon. Cool.

This was a Stakhanov production.