The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 38: Part vampire, part maths teacher

Episode Date: February 15, 2018

Happy Thursday! We're delighted to be in your ears towards the end of the week for the first time. It feels great. This time around: Japanese trains and the perverts within them, Pete still has a hard time coming to terms with the age of some animals which manifests itself in the form of a truly horrific anecdote about tortoises, and some of your lovely emails of course.Thinking about it, have we ever made an episode that *doesn't* feature a truly horrific anecdote from Pete? Probably not.Get your thoughts to us as soon as humanly possible: [e-mail] reviews are important, so please leave us one on iTunes or your podcast provider of choice. Also, tell your pals! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I always know when to come in because the little kind of thing starts. Salute and peach up! Hello everyone, how's your week going? Alright, it's Thursday innit baby? Feels quite weird to be with you on a Thursday. I know. But I like that we are hopefully just distracting people from their annoying or boring, particularly long commute with 25 or 30 minutes or so of nonsense.

If you're stuck on Southern, enjoy a bit of Luke and Pete show. So Southern has been an absolute bane of my life since I've lived where I live. It's terrible, man. I get to the point now where I just completely avoid it. How do you get in then? So the quickest way... Stroll to Brixton. The quickest way we get in would be to get the train from West Norwood into Victoria,

which, to be absolutely clear, I did do this morning and it was okay. But generally, I'll just get the bus to Brixton and then go up on the Victoria line. On the way back'll i'll just go past victoria and go to brixton the annoying thing in is um i know it's boring to be a chat the only thing is that you're not really sure you might be able to get on a train but you're not really sure whether it's just gonna stop or just do something it's like i just wish like you could get out your house and if the clouds were a funny color you go I'm going to walk to work. And it's going to be quicker.

So you'd know. I think it certainly would be better if they would at least make an effort to send people notifications, like text messages and stuff like that. Obviously, the way we work now, we have freedom over where we want to record and what we want to do

and we don't have to come in at seven in the morning. But when I used to have to do that, jeez, sometimes you couldn't even get on the train. Oh, yeah. When I used to live in Homerton trying to get into... God, where did that train come into? It was having an incident, wasn't it? They just put on two carriages for like...

And you'd just be squished. It's like the Japanese metro and not as many people by tenfold. Have you experienced the Japanese metro? No, I haven't actually because weirdly enough I'm not up at seven o'clock. No, but you didn't Japanese Metro? No, I haven't actually because weirdly enough I'm not up at 7 o'clock. No, but you didn't

just give it a go. I'm actually still pissed at 7 o'clock. You're coming home, right? Yeah, I'm coming back. Yeah, exactly. You never thought just to get up and have a look

and see what it's like? I'd just be miserable, wouldn't I? It'd be like, do you remember when Tom Green did the Monkey Subway Hour where he was just

in the middle of the Japanese Metro just lying on the floor and people were just climbing over him and stuff. Incredibly disrespectful, but very funny when you're a teenager.

Probably quite dangerous as well. I interviewed Tom Green, another interview story, I interviewed Tom Green quite recently, and he had quite an interesting time. You know, he lost a testicle to cancer, he went out with, God, who was he married to?

Drew Barrymore. Drew Barrymore. I don't know why I know that. So he spends all of his time just kind of even in 2017 2018 um like a paparazzi will follow him around and just shout hey how's drew how's drew barrymore so like imagine if you have a relationship earlier in your life that lasts maybe yeah maybe two years being reminded of that every single time you leave the house or you're probably only married for about a year anyway, weren't they?

Yeah, it was so weird, so weird. Then they just fell out with each other and stopped. What's he doing now, Pete? He's doing a lot of stand-up, a lot of Vegas shows, things like that. Are you a fan? Not particularly, but he seemed like a particularly affable chap. Quite a nice bloke. On the Japanese commute thing,

for those who haven't seen it, we're talking about... Don't they actually employ people with white gloves to push people on the train? Just push people on the train. Is that actually true? Yeah. And also, you get on the Japanese metro, you have carriages that women and children are allowed in only,

exclusively because of the shikan, which is the word for pervert, I believe. Shikan! If you hear someone go, shikan! Or hentai. of the chican, which is the word for pervert, I believe. Chican! If you hear somebody go chican! Or hentai. You learnt that one, Ali, didn't you? People were just saying it, Luke, and I had to find out what it meant.

There was talk of doing that in London. There was talk of doing that in London. You sort of go, I'm sort of torn between get your shit together, world. Like, if you have to have women-only carriages maybe we cut this off at the fucking source and allow women to uh you know just live a normal life but then i sort of think well yeah that's never going to happen so let's just well let's just solve it or until we get into a position where that can happen yeah yeah it's just weird who knows but they do

that in japan do they they do and it's not really seen as controversial or anything like that no a lot of weird stuff is not seen as controversial like why well just any kind of situation I guess in Japan

oh that's interesting how you've done that I particularly found I mean I know we'll probably come on to talk about this in future weeks when you

because I know you're about to start a new show not in a podcast in my life Luke yeah I know yeah based around Japan but when you were asking me to look into it with you and help you or whatever,

I watched a video and found out like 10 or 12 things that you never knew about Japan. And one of the things that was actually surprising to me was that it's not the done thing to walk down the street eating. And I understand. You don't eat on the tube, you don't really drink on the tube either, unless it's water. So one of the other things that was mentioned was that Japanese culture is so obedient

that they don't cross the road when it's not a green man, even if there's no traffic. And I get that. I completely understand how that would come to pass. But the walking down the road eating thing, I don't really understand why that's even... Bearing in mind it's a very work-based kind of culture as well.

But weirdly, like, people drink on the streets. People drink booze on the streets. You can drink booze on the streets. You can't smoke on the street, but you can smoke in restaurants, you can smoke in bars. There are sort of various... Well, the opposite is what we have now. It's so strange.

So very strange. Like, there are parts of the street you can smoke, I believe, and there's little kind of little booths at the side of the thing. But, yeah, it's fascinating. That's why I keep going back, it's fascinating. So what else has been going on since Monday? Well, we spoke about, what did we speak about last week? We spoke a lot about old animals.

Yeah. Did I ever tell you the story about the old tortoise, the old two tortoises that lived together in the zoo? Where you worked. I used to work at a zoo for a year uh making a cd rom and i'm sure it's come up at on the lucan pitch show before yeah it's a great job it's such a 90s job it is yeah it's like a year making one cd rom didn't make it in the end didn't actually make it i just spent my time um just hanging out with the gibbons uh because they're my favorite primates but

what i like about it is that like i i you know I gamed the system in that I didn't make the thing that I was supposed to be doing. I was just a lazy boy. Gamed the system? I was a lazy boy. You were a lazy prick. Lazy prick who mugged off an educational department in a zoo. Probably a registered charity as well.

It's where the PG Tips chimpanzees came from. Yeah, I don't agree with that. I don't want to see them move a piano into a house. I do. I do. It was brilliant. That's the thing. I do sort of want to see it, but I know I shouldn't see it.

A chimpanzee in a flat cap. Come on. You're having that. Speaking of that, before... Actually, no, you go ahead. Don't forget. Well, basically, the... Yeah, and even if I offered now to make the Mercedes-Benz ROM,

they wouldn't want it. So, who's won? Yeah, true. I've made something that would have lasted about-Benz ROM, they wouldn't want it. So who's won? Yeah, true. I've made something that would have lasted about a year. Oh, I thought about finishing it, but I realised they're completely obsolete now, so I'm doing you a favour. Exactly.

Move on, guys. So these two tortoises lived together. They were like 80, 90, plenty old tortoises. And one morning, one of them chewed off the head of the other one. You're joking. Chewed it off completely and it's just it was just it was like the head of an umbrella in the in the paddock apparently just it lived together they lived together for like 50 years 50 years and suddenly one morning i'm gonna eat your head off that is just bit his head off that is horrific it was

i don't know if i've ever heard a story worse than that it's funny though isn't it after all that time I'm going to bite your head off mate you prick the only thing

I can think of roughly comparable to that there's nowhere near as bad there's a friend of mine when we get to episode 70 yeah it'll be me in your head pal

we a friend of mine went on holiday and forgot to feed his gerbils oh right yeah and he got back one of them and the other one jeez on holiday and forgot to feed his gerbils. Oh, right, yeah. And he got back one and eaten the other one. Jeez, like a fish. That happens a lot.

Gerbils eat... I remember having a few gerbils and they eat their young quite a lot. Not great, is it? I don't want to eat anything that comes out of me. No. No. Do I? Not really.

Nah. No. The chimp thing, you do realise it won't be you giving birth to the baby. Say again. It won't be you giving birth to the baby say again it won't be you giving birth to a baby when you finally have one no but if I was

well it was the mum that did it so if I was yeah I think that's fairly common in the animal kingdom isn't it well not common

but not unheard of but on the chimps thing I don't know if you saw I have to bring it in but there's a really really good article in New Scientist this month

about a guy whose job he's like he's an archaeologist but he only searches the archaeology of animals using tools so instead of going and finding when, say like Stone Age

man has left a tool it's only specifically animals and the reason it was in New Scientist was because it appears to be a lot more widespread than people realise. And they're now talking about how that affects evolution

and different branches of the tree of life, whatever you want to call it. Like simians using rocks to open shells and also nuts and sticks to get termites out of mounds. Yeah, all that kind of stuff. But it was all... To the point where

it's happened completely separately, so this guy would find things like, he would find loads of really flat-faced rocks, which he then later found out certain types of primate were using as anvils to smash things on, and they would carry them with them, they would take them with them and stuff.

Amazing, isn't it? Yeah, it's quite interesting, yeah. That's just reminding me of it. So it's not quite the level of a chimp bringing a grand piano up a staircase. No. Dressed as... An old 70s man.

Yeah, the guy from Love Thy Neighbour. What's his name? Oh, God, I don't know. No, it's a devastating part. Alf Garnet. Alf Garnet, right, yeah. Love Thy Neighbour is... Have you ever seen it in Love Thy Neighbour?

Terrible. So bad. Like... So bad. It's not... It's irreprehensible. Love Thy Neighbours have you ever seen it in Love Thy Neighbours it's terrible so bad so bad it's not it's irreprehensible the jocks aren't there either

no like well it's a really poor man's ITV version of The Death of Stu Park yeah oh my days just really bad

incredible like if you watch I think if even if you watched that back then you'd think that was shocking just shocking when was it 70s yeah like they had

they have they use the w word quite a lot which you don't really hear anymore and it's just kind of like that's the only joke he had in the writer i'd love to i'd love to know who the writer was on that because i can't imagine he works again like anymore but wow so the only the only experience i've got of it is um someone sent a YouTube compilation saying, look how shocking this is. And it was genuinely shocking. And those of you who are listening who aren't based in the UK,

it's just a horrendously racist 70s sitcom we're talking about there. Not that even British people know about it nowadays. No, exactly. But it was also copying another racist sitcom. It's like the guys at ITV went, well, that racist sitcom, the BBC's doing really well. We need to get one of them. What do they like about it? Do they like the guys at ITV went well that racist sitcom the BBC's doing really well we need to get one of them what do they like about it

do they like the you know the writing the writing the lovely half guy or do they like the W word yeah let's use the W word

take that as a takeaway moving swiftly on Pete should we do a few emails yes let's do that do you want the jingle let's do the let's do the bloody jingle then

fine fine I'll have to turn this up won't I keep talking okay Pete's going to try and find the jingle now yeah Let's do the bloody jingle then. Fine, fine. I'll have to turn this up, won't I? Keep talking. Okay, Pete's going to try and find the jingle now. Yeah. You are the only man I know who takes favourite jingles from different shows

and just plays them on all of them. I don't care. Well, this was originally for the Luke and Pete show because you wanted to do a feature called Very Good and Very Bad. And that was the very good bit that I was going to use. I wanted to do something called Overrated Underrated where listeners send us in things and we

say whether they're overrated or underrated. You didn't want to do it. No, I just thought it sounded like bad stand-up. What about those airline peanuts? Yeah, we are essentially bad stand-ups just sat down in the studio. Not telling jokes. let the people judge. Hello at the Luke and Pete show. The Luke and Pete show?

Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com. Why have I put a that in there? I don't know. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com. Yeah. Tell us something that's underrated and also overrated. Do you know what's underrated? People who can close a fucking door properly.

Yeah. People, I can't stand people who walk through a door that they've opened themselves and they just let it slam. It's like people in the gym who just throw the weights on the floor it's like if you can pick it up mate you can put it down buddy and that's underrated and that's underrated people actually yeah okay treat the door properly with the respect it deserves a good start maybe people are arrogant arrogant arrogant people um speaking of this though when i talked about that and i guess that is a radio feature, we were talking about it, and you were talking about someone, I won't name the people involved, so don't worry, but you were talking about someone

who is producing a quite well-known presenter at the moment. A beloved national treasure, you might say. Yeah, I would say so, yeah. And this made me laugh so much when I heard it. You said that his snack of choice when he's on air is a hot orange. Not when he's on air, a hot orange not when he's not when he's on air not when he's on air luke in his private life okay but he gets cooked by the help he doesn't cook orange he doesn't cook it himself you know you're probably thinking at home a hot orange

yeah that's quite nice some warm orange juice no no he gets an orange or rather his maid gets an orange, or rather his maid gets an orange, puts it in a microwave until it's hot. And Mark only... Oh, crap. Mystery man number two only knew this because this National Treasure's son also works on the same thing. The net is closing in. I've been watching the netflix series unabomber yeah and it's like i'm dropping so many hints here pete chuck out a chuck out someone famous who it isn't david boy um

like so he's going you i can't do the accent i started doing the accent don't do the accent no you know what i really like i'm accidentally doing the accent you know what i really like i really like a hot orange um and i i this is how i make it i put the orange in the microwave and heat it and then i eat the hot orange right and everyone's going that's a bit weird and then the man's son basically went you don't do it yourself Karen does it yeah like the maid does it not her real name not her real name

we'll narrow it down no I'd like to know because my concern when I heard this after I finished finished laughing about how

just delightfully Alan Partridge it is is does because when you put something in the microwave I always if I'm cling filming something

I'll pop a couple of holes in it right yeah do you reckon it has to put a hole in the orange to stop it exploding no it can breathe surely

it's probably a perfect semi-permeable permeable membrane the old the old orange skin there we go anyway any more any advances on a hot orange

do get in touch hello at lukeandpeachow.com do you have anything strange that you sort of prepare in a microwave have you got like a bespoke dish I used to have I used to just get a block of cheddar I know you did yeah this is awful put it in a cup put it in a microwave? Have you got like a bespoke dish? I used to have, I used to just get a block of cheddar.

Oh, no you didn't. Yeah, this is awful. Put it in a cup, put it in a microwave, cook it. And then the oil would kind of rise to the top and I could just pour that off. So in many ways,

I was making that entire cup of hot cheddar healthier. I was just having the reddit. A cup of hot cheddar. A cup of hot cheddar. And you can make chocolate cake in the microwave. Oh, yeah, you can, yeah. In a mug. Disgusting microwave, isn't it? Oh, yeah, you can, yeah. In a mug. Disgusting microwave, isn't it?

Yeah, I don't know if it'll be any good. But until people do get in touch with their advances on a hot orange, we're going to have to make do with these emails. I thought I'd start with this very quick one from Ewan Burns, a beautifully Scottish name. He says, Hello, a recent show made me wonder if it would be good to ask people to email in phrases that sound bizarre when taken out of context.

My inspiration for this was Luke saying, you can't use a metal straw in a cat's urethra. Good point. Which is true. I mean, we must have been talking about the acupuncture in cat at that point. I think this show would probably be particularly good for taking sentences out of context, particularly your sentences, Pete. So I thought I'd start with that. Have you got an email? Do you want me to do this Stubbington Study Centre one that I forgot to do last week? I've got one about

the Camelot Theme Park in Charlie from Dan Wainwright. Very 28 days later. I'm enjoying this immensely. He was enjoying the chat about the ambitious but ultimately rubbish Wonderland Theme Park story from a few shows ago. I want to tell you about a similar situation,

the Camelot theme park in Chorley. Once a site attracting half a million visitors a year, its popularity declined and eventually went out of business due to various changes of ownership and seemingly lack of investment. What's quite cool about it, and a lot of your listeners may have seen it, the main nightmare roller coaster structure is still standing and you can see it from the m6 motorway um it's got the full story on this link um basically um it was an old reservoir that was drained and it now has some uh like it's just completely gone to ruin and it kind of uh it looks like a uk version of that haunting fairground at

chernobyl you see any video game set in Eastern Europe after a nuclear blast, they always have a scene on the fairground with the Big Dipper and the old fairground in that. Basically, it looks like that. But we had to make some radiation. There's something very, very spooky about seeing an abandoned fairground. Abandoned fairgrounds, abandoned asylums,

abandoned hospitals. Just anything that had a function. an abandoned fairground. Abandoned fairgrounds, abandoned asylums, abandoned hospitals. Yeah. Just anything that had a function. Have you seen, there's a really good photo journal. I forget where I saw it. I'll have to try and Google it. Of a guy who's gone around

photographing abandoned Olympic sites. Oh, nice. So the way that there's been, so the idea being there's been absolutely no legacy for so many of these different Olympic venues. But we get sold this lie every time, don't we?

We, personally. I'm not paying for it again. I've been sold a lie. We get told that stadiums kind of make a lot of money for the area. They empirically don't. They just don't. Yeah, I mean, there's a book by Simon Cooper, the FT guy who does a lot of good stuff on sport and football,

talking about how it's essentially a lie that a stadium in a new place is going to bring a load of economic benefits when it just doesn't. But this particular photojournalist is pretty spooky because it's got things like, for example, an empty Olympic swimming pool just covered in weeds and moss. Olympic swimming pools are massive. I know it's a ridiculous thing to say, but if you go to the local gym and go to the swimming pool they're hardly ever olympic size the olympic size ones are twice as big as the ones you see they're massive and to see one abandoned covered in weed is really

really spooky there's a big swimming pool in a university in america i could not tell you which one it is but they've just basically used it as storage so they just throw old desks in it so it's full to the brim of all desks and chairs and old bits of equipment and it looks so bizarre. I bet. It looks like someone's gone mad with a mod for Skyrim and they've spawned like a million apples and put them all in a hill. Imagine what like an alien

civilisation would think if they came down and saw that. Well that's how they store chairs. A little big size swimming pool. But the pictures are incredible. There's a beautiful... I mean, I love anything abandoned anyway. I think we've spoken to great length about... Your own soul.

My heart. Abandoned tube stations that I absolutely love. But there's a beautiful image in this collection of theme park images where someone's propped up a sign saying the Nightmare Ride is closed for maintenance. And obviously, you know, it closed some years ago. 30 years ago, yeah.

Yeah. But if you check out, I think there's a website dedicated to it that Dan Wainwright has basically pointed out, 28dayslater.co.uk. I hope they've been to Mr Blobbyland because that's another great fairground that's shut down and it's just this kind of broken, I think probably some kids from Vice

probably went in there and filmed it recently, but it's an old Mr Blobby is it in crinkly bottom yeah well i imagine there'll be a crinkly bottom situation there i imagine there will as there often is maybe the bottom wasn't even crinkly before now it has because of disrepair um what about this then from callum um i trailed this last week and i talked about it the week before stubbington study center which is a place where um your sort of junior school kids would go for like an educational trip away it was very I trailed this last week, and I talked about it the week before, Stubbington Study Centre, which is a place where your junior school kids would go for an educational trip away. It was very exciting because you'd be away from your parents

at the age of about 11, so it was pretty cool. But I didn't get to go. I actually asked my mum about it. I messaged her saying, why weren't we able to go to Stubbington Study Centre? The SS, Mum. Why? SSC. SSC, actually. Because I thought it was the year ahead of us

were misbehaving so badly there that they didn't have us back. But my mum thinks... It's been a plot twist here. Right. My mum thinks that it was because they were having a refurb. So it's not even as interesting as that.

Yeah, that is quite dull. Anyway, this is from Callum and hopefully isn't as dull as that. He says, While listening to your show, Luke helped to transport me back to my school days with his tales on Stubbington Study Centre. since he wasn't lucky enough to go there himself i thought i'd fill him in on one of the experiences i had while visiting the center and spying on badges

etc so that's what you could do cool and he said i was only a wee lad at school in basingstoke which really is just down the road uh also in hampshire he says the penultimate night of our stay was a night that we were all fully aware of before we travelled down as it was a night known as Stubbington Scare Night. This is right up your street, Donny. A night when the teachers decided to dress up as ghosts, werewolves and witches and proceeded to scare us shitless

as we went on an imaginary ghost hunt around the woodland site. Would that be allowed now? No. God, no. He said, looking back on it... Who knows what hunt around the woodland site would that be allowed now uh no god no well he said looking back what's in the in the woodland well exactly he's looking back on it now it's probably one of the weirdest school activities we carried out but it was all made worthwhile when i witnessed my mate johnny sprinting down the hill as he's but he had bumped into a vampire slash math teacher only to go arse over tit as he slipped and proceeded to fall a huge pile of dog shit days of my youth i will always look back on him with fondness thanks callum isn't that terrible

that like back in the day kids used to sort of be able to run around and just sort of do what they want and now there's so fewer instances of dog shit they're not allowed outside because of peds yeah it's depressing and i know this is something that older people say and i hate the cliche aspect of it, and I hate that I'm probably wrong in some way that I can't fathom how, but the way that my hometown's set out, I go past where I used to live, where I spent the lion's share of my childhood, quite a lot,

and it's on foot or when I'm running, and I run down the street that I used to live on and the back alleyway around the back of it, and the park near there and there is never anyone there never not a single human being to be seen outside but when i was a kid it was full of people so there genuinely is something in there i don't know what it is but there's genuinely there's people still living there there's cars at the houses everything like that yeah but people just do not go outside is it the same way you were internet uh i think all

no two of my houses have been demolished. So there's nothing there, really. A bit like the Rose Fred West thing. Get it knocked down. The Fritzl cellar. Get it knocked down. Fill it in. Fill it with concrete.

Yeah. Never mind. Why were they knocked down? Are you going to tell us? Say again? Why were they actually demolished? To make new houses. But I think a couple of them haven't been built yet.

A lot of speculation in Hartlepool. They just put houses up and go, ah, someone's going to buy them. Even though you can still buy a house for like 10 grand in Hartlepool. Can you really? Yeah, you really can. Did your mum and dad send you updates about what's going on in the town and stuff? Oh, yeah, only if someone's died. We had the main field director in town was arrested for sexually abusing a boy quite recently.

Funeral director, you said? Yeah, he was a big fixture in the town. Yeah, just stuff like that, really. Just the sad things. And also the plight of Hartlepool United Football Club. Yeah, that's something that unites us all. Pete, what's the progress on you inviting your dad on holiday with you? Because we had a bit of take-up on that.

People were enjoying that story he said your mam will want to go on holiday as well and I said no she won't she's never getting on a plane you're just using that as an excuse and he replied that is very rude about your mother I'm turning my phone off now

the phone's in the pocket I'm going how is the phone in the pocket if he'll text me then dad yeah and then i called him a tart i think you'd have a lovely time yeah my dad loves a flounce honestly oh my god we both love a flounce but he's the expert he sounds like a right old diva my thing is what time did you text him because he's probably sleeping but you hate the things in your parents that you see in yourself isn't it really it's just kind of like the emotional um silliness that i don in yourself, isn't it, really? It's just kind of like the emotional silliness that I don't really necessarily respect in myself.

I see my dad and I go, oh, piss off, Dad. I don't know where you get it from. One more email, I think. Do you want to do it or shall I do it? You do it. Okay, it's from Richard Cook. He says, hello, I cannot find proof for this, so you'll have to take my word for it.

The amount of emails we get like that. But our cat Smokey lived till he was 22 that's an old cat he even got a birthday advert in the local newspaper when he turned 21 he was a very happy cat because he ate at six different houses and talking about him reminds me of the time an elderly lady saw him in the gutter with his legs in the air she thought he'd been run over but when we got out there it turned out he was sunbathing richard cook from the west listen richard cooks from the western isles in scotland richard run over, but when we got out there, it turned out he was sunbathing. Richard Cook from the West... Listen, Richard Cook's from the Western Isles in Scotland. Richard, tell us more about your

home on the Western Isles of Scotland. What island is it? What's it like? Do you see ducks? I love the Western Isles. Are there ducks up there? There probably are, Pete, yeah. Isn't the Western Isles has got palm trees? There's always that fact that sort of, because of the weird gulf stream. Can you get a gulf stream up there? Maybe Richard can tell us all this.

Do you get palm trees on the west coast of Scotland somewhere? This is like presenting with a random word generator. Palm trees, Gulf Stream. Vanilla. Donald Trump. Donald Trump. Carpet. Did you see Donald Trump's hair get blown up?

It was like all in one big slab, isn't it? Yeah, it looked very odd. Because I remember the bloke who does similar kind of hair work basically exposed why he does that. It's this weird kind of hook, kind of Velcro system they've got, like the way his normal hair's been woven with some extra stuff. Is this what Donald's got, is it? Yeah, yeah.

So they sort of use his hair as a hook, and it's just a really antiquated way of doing things. Just get a syrup. Just get a bloody syrup. He's gone too far down one lane now and he can't escape everything about donald trump is quite 80s isn't it i'm not surprised that he's got a 1980s sort of technique to hair i mean that's the least surprising thing i've ever heard about it's really space age anyway there is a rule that um we've got you and ip an unwritten rule which we talked about that the moment we start talking about US President Donald Trump's hair

is a time to get out of it. Yeah, let's get out of here. We've got to go. Yeah, it's been fun. We'll see you on Monday. We'll see you on Monday. Get in touch. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com.

Not TheLukeandPeteShow.com, Pete, you idiot. Have a lovely weekend, everyone. Yeah. Friday tomorrow. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. That doesn't rule out anything at all.