The Luke and Pete Show - Episode 86: Kneeling in mud in the name of Liam Neeson

Episode Date: August 2, 2018

A police helicopter has been keeping Luke from watching TV. Pete's more interested in those little finger trick skateboards you used to get back in the day. What were they called? Did you ever become good at using one? If so, let us know.Meanwhile, we hear of a man who died by having a tortoise dropped on his bald head, and another, separate, man who had a rum old time working as Liam Neeson's stand in on a Martin Scorsese movie. Yes, really. Have you ever worked with Marty? Let us know! Even if you haven't, we'd still love to hear from you: [e-mail] ***Please take the time to rate and review us on iTunes or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey Luke, I want to start the show like this. Weren't. Say it again, listen to how she says weren't. Listen to how she says weren't. There was a fig tree in Bethany whose branches were all bare when the master looked for figs to eat

there weren't any there. See, she's extended, she's trying to find an extra syllable but why didn't she just say were not? Were not any, yeah, she could have. Weren't any were there. I've never heard anyone say weren't before.

Weren't. So that was. There is a weren't out for your arrest. Arrest. Step out of the car, please, man. We have a reason to believe there is a weren't out for your arrest. Have you ever been told off by a policeman? Oh, I've got a police story, actually out for your arrest. Have you ever been told off by a policeman? Oh, I've got a police story, actually, from this week.

Have I ever been told off by a policeman? Is that a Jackie Chan film? Yeah, I have. I probably have, yeah. I imagine I have, yeah. I got told off for throwing a rock at a car. Oh, we've all done that. In Birmingham.

In Birmingham? That's 22. I'm led to believe that's de rigueur in Birmingham. De rigueur. Yeah. Welcome to the Luke and Pete show, episode 80-something. We are very happy to have you with us. That is the Pete.

Hello. I am the Luke. We are the law. Yeah, we are the law. A great intro to the show, Pete. Much, much, much enjoyed. Cheers, baby. Yes, do you want to hear this, please, story?

Yes, I do. So, just last night, I am watching an episode of Game of Thrones. Oh, you're going through them all, aren't you? In time for the new one. I am, with my lovely wife. Reddit was covered in Margaret Tyrell cosplay for some reason. Was it? This week.

I don't know why. There are people doing the funny little wonky mouse she's got. No, I've got no wonky mouse. I'm Margaret Tyrell. Marjorie Tyrell. Is it Marjorie Tyrell? Who's the young one mouse Marjorie Terrell is it Marjorie Terrell who's the young one Marjorie Terrell

the young one yeah she's played by Natalie Dormer Dormer yeah she's in something new on Netflix as well she's got a little pixie face

anyway yeah we were watching an episode of Game of Thrones sat around just watching it and a helicopter circles overhead

now I live in South London not massively out of the ordinary I suppose there's always somebody jumping through gardens, isn't there? Yeah, well, exactly.

So the helicopter gets to the point where it's so low and so loud, we can't actually hear the TV over the helicopter. So I pause it. I say, what's going on out there? Obviously, you've got the windows open because it's hot at the moment. Wife sticks her head out the window.

A police car comes screaming down the road. Our road is a quiet side a police car comes screaming down the road our road is a quiet side road it comes screaming down the road and another police van comes up the other end of the road and it stops probably about 20 houses down and the helicopter's hovering with the searchlight on stark searchlight on

looking for a chap and I was thinking what can be happening here this must be something absolutely outrageous there's a chap on the loose a chap a blooming unsavoury chap at that. And it turned out he had brought cheap crisps to a dinner party. No.

It turned out it was a guy. They thought there was a burglar going around, jumping through open windows. Oh, right, okay. Because of the summer. Jumping through? That's pretty spectacular. To rob them.

We live on the first floor, so it's not a problem for us. Turns out, drunken chap forgot on his key. Right, why did they need a helicopter for that? You tell me. They knew which house they were going to. So, welcome to the Luke and Pete show, police resources special. How much does a helicopter cost? And that's a few grand, isn't it?

I think it's a few grand every time you sortie it. Is that the word? Sortie it? I can't remember who I was talking to, but they had to have a helicopter called for them in some far-off place. Might have been France. And it was something like 30 grand.

Oh, no, it was Thailand. So he moved, a friend's dad, friend of a friend's dad, moved to Thailand. Got ill, had to be lifted to hospital for whatever reason. He moved up there because he had no money. And he thought, the story was, better example of life, better quality of life, cost of living and all that stuff. Better example of life.

Better example of life. Better quality of life. I mean, you do question any single man going to Thailand for a better quality of life in big, old inverted commas. No comment. No comment. And, yeah, he had to old inverted commas. No comment. No comment. And, yeah, he had to be airlifted to hospital.

£30,000. And he was like... That's for an air ambulance, though, right? Air ambulance, yeah. He was like, well, I can't pay that, can I? I just can't pay that. So what happened then? He didn't pay. He just went bankrupt and then went home.

So he basically... Oh, no, yeah, so he went bankrupt. He went home and they went, well, you can never come to Thailand again. He's going, well, I'm not going to, am I? Hang on, Steve. Down at a am I? Hang on, Steve. Down at a local pub. Hang on, Steve.

You went to Thailand because you were bankrupt here? You said you've bankrupted yourself in Thailand as well? Twice, yeah. Where are you going next? Go to Brunei? Yeah. Do you remember Swirly Man? Do you remember Swirly Face Man?

No. Who got caught doing the old pedo in Thailand. Oh, I do remember that story, yeah. Do you remember? And just what he'd done was to obscure his face while he was perpetrating some fucking obscene and terrible acts. He just used the Photoshop filter that swirled his face a bit. Right.

But the problem is, that's an algorithm that can be reversed quite easily. Right. Like, you go to Photoshop and you go, right, swirl it either way. So basically, the farthest piece of it in the world Photoshop and you go, right, swirl it either way. So basically, the finest B-sensors in the world just went, Photoshop, open, undo. Undo. Well, pretty much, yeah, just unswirl. Like, find the centre of the swirl, unswirl it, and then you've got

a perfect picture of this guy's face. And he got caught instantly. He's in jail now. He's in jail now, yeah. Bloody right as well. Bloody right as well, yeah. Swirly man. Should we deviate from sort of paedophiles? Should we talk about something that isn't to do with paedophiles do we have to

not Elon Musk no I'm not getting to Elon Musk again we have Elon Musk is a bad boy for life oh that's one of those songs where now

I just want to hear more of it it's a good riff I just want to hear more of it it's a great riff who played the guitar on that

was it the bloke out of the Red and Chili Peppers it's possible because I know it was the drummer. It was Travis Barker from Blink-182 and P. Diddy slash Puff Daddy

or whatever the hell we'd call ourselves at that point. And I believe a lot of Hollywood stars are in the video. And da-dow-dow-dow-dow-dow. Was it John Frusciante? Or something like that. Dave Navarro. Dave Navarro! And he was in Red Hot Chili Peppers.

He was in Poor Life of Pyros with Perry Thingy as well, wasn't he? Perry Forel. Yeah, I think he was. Apparently Ben Stiller's on it. Yes, he was in the video. I bet Dev Navarro's had some sex. I think you're probably correct there.

He's a bloody good looking chap. Now there's a man with a porn shed. Can I also say... I'd love to be Dev Navarro. On Bad Boys for Life, shed i'd love to be dev navarro on bad boys for life um also featured uh an appearance from everyone's favorite band crazy town crazy was he involved remember butterfly sugar baby shifty shell shock his name was what the main guy the muscle guy he went into celebrity rehab did he and then didn't do anything else. There's a tattoo studio on Holloway Road

that if you get the bus down or up Holloway Road and you're on the top deck, you can see inside the tattoo studio and they've got a crazy town picture up. And I always think, take that down. So dated. Take that down. No one's impressed with that.

Shifty Shellshock, whose real name... Shifty Shellshock. His real name is Seth Brooks Binzer. That's even worse. Yeah, that's... Chef Brooke Brilzer. What, you changed your name to Dave Clifton? The three TV shows he's been in

are Celebrity Rehab 1... No, four. Celebrity Rehab 1, Celebrity Rehab 2, Sober House 1, and Sober House 2. Yeah. Yeah, it's not great, is it?

Not great. Of course, we wouldn't like to trivialise addiction. No. But what we would do is probably say Shifty Shellshock is a terrible name and Crazy Town were probably the most, let me just check, 2000,

the year 2000 band ever. May I shock you? They weren't. Okay. 2000 the year 2000 band ever may I may I shock you they weren't okay those guys were who was that again that was

was it disturbed down with the sickness that sounds about right yeah I think so and I didn't realise this but they're Crazy Town's famous song Butterfly

give us a little ditty of it Pete do you want to sing it people butterfly sugar baby come my lady come come my butterfly, sugar, baby. Come, my lady, come, come, my lady. Be my butterfly, sugar, baby. Da-da-da-da-da, sexy little thing. Da-da-da-da-da, sexy thing.

And then all his tattoos turned into butterflies and flew away. There we go. A very good pricey of the November 2000. A very pretty lady in that video. I know ladies in videos are generally pretty, but there was just a particularly pretty one, Dreadlocks. It's based on a sample of a song of the Red Hot Chili Peppers'

1999 album Mother's Milk, therefore completing the circle, bringing us back round to Bad Boys for Life. Um... There we go. We're in a different studio, so I've got slightly more expansive noises. Love the pan pipes.

Love a pan pipe flourish. I think every song should have one. I like that because it's part Peruvian, part Chinese. Or part... Did you say Japanese? Japanese, maybe. Before we go away and come back again for some emails, and we've got some crackers this week,

let me tell you that. Yo. In further sodium news... Sodium news. This is the story that keeps on giving. This sodium business is far more prevalent than we ever knew it could be. Okay. Rhys has emailed in saying that in the book My Sister's Keeper,

I've not read it. Right. Apparently it's very good. A kid throws sodium down a toilet and gets suspended from school for three weeks. Sodium vandals are everywhere you look. As that famous podcast series says, they walk among us. Don't throw sodium in anything. Don't put sodium in my water

bottle. It's naughty. Right, shall we take a break and be back with some beautiful emails? Yeah. We'll both look after Luke. We'll both look after Luke. If he feels sad without mum and dad, we'll both look after Luke. I'll both look after Luke. If he feels sad about Mum and Dad,

we'll both look after Luke. Yep. I love that. We haven't had that one for ages. We haven't had that version, have we? At some point in this show, I am going to try and explain via a PhD listener,

or he's currently studying for his PhD, about time dilation based on a conversation we had a couple of weeks ago about moving, how time's slowing conversation we had a couple of weeks ago about moving time slowing down and that kind of stuff. But I'm going to build up to that, I think. When I read these things, and I did read that email, I think,

oh, that's really interesting. And then my brain goes, here, here. Spoiler alert, you're not going to remember any of this. You shouldn't be even bothered reading it. But the guy who emailed it in, Jack, he's done a pretty good job in explaining it, so I'm just going to read it verbatim and hope it makes sense. But I'm not going to do it yet.

I'm going to do, first of all, I want to talk to you, Pete, with an email I have carefully entitled A Bald Head Update. Okay. Hello, gentlemen. My name is Art. It's short for Arthur,

which is my middle name. Okay. I was intrigued by your talk a couple of shows ago about dropping things on bald heads. Thanks to my degree in classics, it reminded me of the death of Aeschylus, the ancient Greek playwright who wrote the Oresteia, among other things.

Aeschylus apparently died when an eagle dropped a tortoise on his bald head because the eagle thought his head was a rock. Apparently certain eagles do this to break open the hard shells of tortoises. This just goes to show that bald people have to worry about things that people with hair do not, such as falling tortoises.

I bet Aeschylus would have chosen the hair over the tortoise. What do you think about that? I think that never happened, but also... Would you think it's a metaphor? I think it's fascinating that a tortoise, it was a heavy tortoise to kill a man. We don't know the size of the tortoise. My parents have got a tortoise.

It might be like the sharp edges might maybe caught it, possibly. Did it break the tortoise, though? That's what I need an update for. Yeah, that's what I would like to know. My parents have a tortoise, and the size it is, it's probably about six or seven years old, and I think the size it is now, if you dropped it... What floor are we on here?

Two. If we dropped it on someone's head from the... I don't think it would kill them. No. It would give them a nasty gash, because for some reason I think they'd probably back-loaded the old totai. I reckon they've got a bit of a rump.

We don't know about the relevant health of Aeschylus either. No, exactly. He might have been in... He might have been in his cups, as they say then. Might have been in poor health. He might have hit his... The tortoise might have hit his head.

Yeah. And his head might have hit the floor. Yeah, that could have been what killed him. Yeah. He could have been like, bloody hell. Jesus. I saw today a video of a tortoise

that had been... You know those little tiny wee skateboards that people used to do tricks on? They were like about that big. Yeah, I never really understood that. Incredible. Can little tiny wee skateboards that people used to do tricks on? They were about that big. Yeah, I never really understood that. Can you shed some light on that? Because to me, they look completely pointless. They look completely pointless and they're ridiculous,

but by virtue of the fact that you can use them with your fingers, I forget what they're called now, but there were little trick skateboards that you could just run around with your fingers. If you kind of keep a concerted weight on the skateboard, you can kind of do the same tricks you can with your feet, sort of. You can do, like, you know, ollies and stuff. Oh, that's the point of it, is it?

But it is a bit weird. Yeah, you can do little tricks with it and stuff, but, yeah, it is a bit strange. I bet there are some people on the internet who are brilliant at it. Absolutely brilliant at it, yeah. Some people can solve a Rubik's Cube in, like, ten seconds or something. Oh, did you see that video of that kid, who, he's probably about 12

or 13, who solved three Rubik's Cubes while juggling them. Ugh. I just worry for people. Yeah. I do. That's not gonna help them in later life, is it? But it's impressive to watch. I'm pleased you've, um, you've solved that phenomenon, because I remember those little

skateboards, but I didn't, I had no idea what they were for. I can't remember what they're called. But you could get like replacement wheels and you get a little screwdriver with it and stuff and replace the wheels and stuff.

All very strange. I bet there's people into everything. Oh mate. Do you want to do an email mate? Alright then, I will.

Hello to Petrol. No. This is what I wrote under Petrol and I think I've remembered why I wrote Petrol. Dave, down under. You trailed this last time,

didn't you? Petrol. Long time listener, currently sitting on a packed commuter train home in Melbourne, so no random Chinese battery brands to hand. With regard to your recent chat about bike tyres, I can confirm that indeed high quality mountain bikes generally now have tubeless tyres. We were talking about this

last week. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can confirm that indeed high quality mountain bikes generally now have tubeless tyres. We were talking about this last week. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can confirm that, indeed, high-quality mountain bikes generally now have tubeless tyres. You have to squirt special sealant into the non-inflated tyre and then using a high-pressure pump or CO2 canister, inflate it rapidly so that the bead of the tyre pops quite loudly onto the rim and seals it. The gloop remains inside the tyre.

Ready yourself, seal any punctures you might encounter out on the trails. Pretty nifty, I reckon, says Dave down under. Have you ever seen someone inflate a tyre with petrol? No. So you get, I don't really know how you do it, but you put the tyre, the uninflated tyre, on the rim of the wheel.

This is like a car tyre. And you sort of basically dribble petrol around the rim, and then you set fire to the petrol, and it goes poof, and for some reason, I'm not really sure of the physics of it, or the chemistry,

it inflates the tyre like that. It's amazing. Right, why would you do that? To inflate your tyre and look cool really quickly. It's very dangerous. You shouldn't do it. I won't. The thing I don't...

I haven't even got a bike. The thing I... This is a car tyre. Oh, it's a car tyre? So, like that. Right, that sounds even more dangerous. The thing I don't like about this idea of having a high-pressure pump or CO2 canister,

to me... He's off his canister. He's off his canister. To me, it's quite unromantic. I quite like the idea of being in the back garden with my dad fixing a bike tyre. And I haven't got a high-pressure pump or a CO2 canister. Some people don't have dads,

and some people have places to be quickly. Some people have got money to buy a CO2 canister. I bet you've got a few of them knocking about your flat. No, I've got some of that paint that's darker than any of the black paint. Oh, that was interesting. Vantablack. Yeah, how much did that cost? I don't know, not very expensive.

I've not painted anything with it, let's make that very clear. So, Vantablack, I couldn't have been less interested in this when you told me about it. And then when I saw it, I was like, whoa, that looks like an actual hole. It's a proper optical illusion that yeah I paint my hands black how does it work that man from

22 pilots what's that I was a 21 pilot I forget I don't know what you're talking about it's a band he paints his hands

and neck black for some reason I don't know why right emo is it emo it's a little bit emo more rap

more rap okay yeah so Vantage Black was actually quite interesting in the end. I've got an email here about time dilation, and I'm going to go for it. Time dilation. Do you want an exciting bit of music? I'll give it a go, yeah.

Yeah, all right. Time dilation. With Jack. Thank you, Jack. Jack says, Hello, guys. My batteries are Japantech.. Thank you, Jack. Jack says, Hello, guys. My batteries are Japan tech. Japan tech.

Wow. As a new player entered the game, possibly. Nihon tech. He says, I was listening to episode 82 where you discussed how time can pass at different rates depending on the speed that you were moving. I'm not sure if this qualifies me as an expert,

but I have a master's in physics from the University of Leicester and soon will be starting my PhD in physics so I can hopefully shed some light on the phenomenon. The effect you mentioned is known as time dilation and is a consequence of Einstein's theory of special relativity. The theory itself is somewhat complicated, but the main premise is the fact that the speed of light is a constant for any person observing it, whether they are moving or not. This is in contrast to for example the speed of a car you might observe driving past you in this situation the car would appear faster if you were stationary at the side of the road observing it than if you were driving next to

it at a slightly slower speed due to its motion relative to you the observer that makes sense right so you're driving a car car slightly faster than you it looks like it's moving slowly than it would be if you're standing and it flies past it makes sense time dilation is a direct consequence of the fact that the speed of light must be the same for any observer regardless of their speed einstein used the example of light bouncing between two perfectly reflecting mirrors if the mirrors are stationary the light will travel from one mirror to the other and back in a center about sorry if the mirrors are stationary the light will travel from one mirror to the other and back in a center about sorry if the mirrors are stationary the light will travel from one mirror to the other and back in a set amount of time which can be measured however if the

mirrors were placed in some vehicle moving at a substantial speed the distance which the light has to travel to go from one mirror to the other and back is larger this is due to the fact the mirror has moved some distance horizontally in between the light bouncing off it right and he's included the diagram and it makes sense if you look at the diagram, which I know none of you can see, so just bear with me. This causes a problem because speed of light must be constant for both scenarios.

So, for the light to have travelled a greater distance at the same speed, time must have passed slower for the moving scenario. Right. So, for the moving scenario, time must have passed slower because the speed of light can't change.

It's a constant. It can't change. So, it has to be time that changes this effect is what's caused fast moving objects to technically age slower than those that are stationary relative to them it should also be noted that unless you are traveling close to the speed of light the effect is of course negligible as of 2013 the record achieved by a human was a russian uh sergai krikalev who having spent 800 days in orbit around the earth is 0.02 seconds younger than anyone who stayed on the earth for the same length of time i'm sure he said i'm sure someone can explain this better than me but i thought i'd give it a go uh thanks for all the pods and keep up the good work now i don't know if i've done a terrible job reading that but

i do actually understand that based on what he said um and just quickly on sergai krikalev on his on his wikipedia page it it says Krikalev is the current time travel record holder having gained 22.68 milliseconds of live time on his journey to space oh

does he ever think I reckon that weighs heavy on him he's thinking have I just wasted that amount of time every time he's like you know if he drops the soap

in the shower and he's looking for it it's like that's a waste of how would you get on on the International Space Station? Say again? I'm a pretty solitary guy when I need to be.

I think I'd be all right. But you've got ailments, remember? I'd bring my asthmas. I'd bring my asthma medication, wouldn't I? I'd be quite clean air up there. I reckon they'd rule you out. Why? I just think it would.

I think they wouldn't want to take the risk. Well, they wouldn't take the risk of you. You're too big. You'd bash your head on stuff. Oh, I think I'd be too large, yeah. I think I would be. I think, especially at the earlier space, the earlier astronauts,

I mean, the guys who, you know, the Apollo missions and stuff, the capsule was absolutely tiny. Absolutely. I mean, I've seen it at the space centre when I was in the US. It's horrendous to even look at, let alone get in it,

and let alone be flying to space in it. You would have to train very, for a long time, just to sort of deal with that amount of, I can't, I just want to move my legs. Yeah. Ah! Yeah, you're stuck in that little spot, yeah.

It's not great, mate. It is not great. It's all going to space, guys. If anyone else wants to have a go at explaining the time dilation business, please do let us know. We're happy to hear about it, although I think jack did a

blooming good job and if there's any confusion the blame certainly lies at my door and not jack's um do you want to do another email peter yeah let's do another email i've just noticed luke that um we're in a different studio this week and um you're on three or four different cameras you're being filmed from every angle it's not great is it it is a little bit great it's not great it's fun it's not great for me hello to

the Australian man where's this gone I've done double sided prints so it's quite confusing this one it's a long one but it's a good one oh no

I don't have the names the guy who was a stand in oh right I've got it here have you got it his name is Bill Bill thank you Bill here's one for you that should satisfy Pete's taste for the Far East

and Luke's penchant for Liam Neeson. I was on the way where I had a penchant for Liam Neeson. No, I don't think that's ever been discussed, to be honest. No. Never mind. It's between me and my internet service provider, that. While living and teaching in Taipei, Taiwan, if you've not been thoroughly recommended for a top China-Western mashup,

I do fancy a bit of Taipei. I was playing centre in the back. Did you see that if you type in Taiwan, if you type in the Taiwanese flag in the recent iOS update on your mobile phone and you live in China, if it's a Chinese mobile phone, iPhone version, it crashes.

It crashes the whole thing. Why? Because they've got a boner about Taiwanese independence. They don't believe in it. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's an interesting situation, Taipei, Taiwan. I thought that was Tibet. It crashes the whole thing. Why? Because they've got a boner about Taiwanese independence, haven't they? They don't believe in it. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's an interesting situation, Taipei, Taiwan. I thought that was Tibet. But both of them.

Both of them. They're very upset. I'm not an expert on that part of the world. I was playing centre-back for a pub team called The Badgers, made up of a bunch of white expats. One of the players on the team's wives worked in the film industry over there, and they wanted some western extras for a film I sent them my details, height etc

and they got in touch with me I turned up on the first day and they told me he'd be standing in or I'd be standing in for Liam Neeson as I was the same build and apparently body type as an ageing man, I was 25 at the time I then found that the film was going to be directed by Martin Scorsese

the Don of Films I'm a big film buff so I was stoked for the opportunity found that the film was going to be directed by Martin Scorsese, the Don of Films. This is a great day out. It's good, isn't it? I'm a big film buff, so I was stoked for the opportunity. So for about two weeks, I worked nights on this film and taught English in the day. I embarrassed myself almost immediately when a French stand-in told me to ask the director of photography about my schedule.

I was then told by five different people that I shouldn't speak to them, and he didn't bother himself with such trivial things. These days were long, and I basically had to do everything that Neeson did first and then Neeson would come in and do it properly. At the sight of some geezers on the side of a Taiwanese mountain we had to wear masks to avoid sulphur

poisoning. I was told to kneel in the mud it was very degrading. They told me I wasn't allowed to kneel on I think they said Nick Leeson's on Liam Neeson's knee pads because they were carefully positioned for him instead I had to kneel on some sharp rocks Neeson's, on Liam Neeson's knee pads because they were carefully positioned for him. Instead, I had to kneel on some sharp rocks. Neeson came over and said,

Thanks for my work. Hey, at least the mud's warm, he added. Is that your Liam Neeson? Yeah. What, is that my Liam Neeson? He's very poor. What do you mean? I just don't think you sounded like him.

I will find you an able. I have an interesting set of skills. That's all right, isn't it? That was a bit better, yeah. He doesn't say that, doesn't he? Hey, at least the mud's warm, baby, he added. Anyway, on the last day of... You sound like Kojak.

Who loves you, baby? On the last day of filming, the cast and crew applauded Neeson's work on the film. As he left, they cheered him. He left with a fad wad of cash, possibly in the millions. A few minutes later, somebody said, Oi, you're done. I left in silence, which was also the film's name.

Silence. Oh. The one set in Japan. It's got the guy who was Spider-Man in it. Yes, and also Adam Driver. Is that Andrew Garfield in it? Andrew Garfield. I haven't seen it.

Is it good? I heard it's supposed to be alright. I thought it was alright, yeah. Yeah, so he's done. I was paid less than for teaching. That was the life of a stand-in. The film wasn't very good, but at least my name is on a Scorsese credit.

I mean, I thought it got a good review. Very long, though. It was like three hours. Very harrowing. Films are too long these days, aren't they? They really are. It was a mad experience. I stole many Nutri-Grain bars

to get my compensation for shitty pay and mad hours. They sent an email round to prevent this during filming. It was cool to look in Scorsese's eyes, but we were told not to talk to him at all, and I was told off another time for walking past him in his cronies discussing something while going to the bogs. I often find that sort of relationship between extras and support actors and that kind of stuff,

and the main... I have no experience of it, but it always seems to me to be quite sort of weird. Yeah. But I don't seem to deal with it very well. Very strange, yeah. They were quite sort of standoffish and... I've told you Mark as an extra

who does the WrestleMe thing. Right. He was in a film with Johnny Depp and Johnny Depp wouldn't talk to him. Or actually Mark tried to talk to him. Oh, yeah, you did tell me that, yeah. Damn! Damn! Damn!

I remember when I lived in New Zealand in 2003, went to go and stay with a friend's aunt and uncle and they live in a town which had been used to film The Last Samurai. Okay, right. Which is filmed in Taranaki in New Zealand. And they said that like, they were talking about Tom Cruise,

and he was, like, a really good egg, and, like, his kids went to the local school for a bit. There is no... I've never heard anything but excellent things about Tom Cruise. He's apparently a lovely chap, but he's obviously pilloried because of his choices when it comes to religion.

Scientology. Scientology, mate. Still find it. Yeah, Silence as a film got good reviews. I haven't actually seen it, but Bill, who was in it, said it wasn't find it. Yeah, you'll find it. Yeah, Silence as a film got good reviews. I haven't actually seen it, but Bill, who was in it, said it wasn't very good.

So, I mean, who are we to argue with that? Well, Bill ended the email by saying, I also acted in a breast enlargement advert in China where the crew

were much nicer. Is that your... Pete, your experience of breast enlargement adverts in China must be better than mine. Oh, yeah, hugely, yeah. And would you say that sounds

reasonable from Bill I've never been in I'd love to act in like a foreign thing because I don't think you need to

be a good actor really like Bill Murray in what's it called Lost in Translation yeah anything like that

yeah you're off that part of the world soon aren't you I'll try and get a job you could easily get a job in an

advert or something you've got to look like a normal person I I've got a career. You could easily get a job in an advert or something. I don't think you could. You've got to have, you've got to look like a normal person. I don't like a normal person. Yeah, but you look very distinctive

compared to the Chinese. Yeah, people don't like, yeah, but people don't like that. They like the blonde, blonde hair, blue eyed kind of good looking guys. Well, here I am. The last bit of that.

I've actually got green eyes, not blue anyway, so I'll be, I'll be out of luck. Right, I think that was just about time, time up, I think, Time. I'll be I'll be out of luck right I think that's just about time time up I think time

I'll do this clap aboard yeah do that and we'll come back next week and we'll come back stronger you got my guarantee

come back brighter is the song oh no by Reef yeah you give my cast eye and guarantee that next week

we will be as good as this. And if you want to get in touch with the show, hello at lukeandpeachow.com with anything you've heard that you like or you've got something to contribute to. And also, if you've just got anything you want to get off your chest, email in. One thing I have been disappointed in, in terms of our listenership, is a lack of emails about bad job interviews.

Oh, right, okay, yeah. Because I thought everyone would have a story about that. We had a really good one a few weeks ago where a lad, did he walk? He had a terrible time. He just kept on walking. He had new shoes, he couldn't walk in them, he had to walk bare feet,

and he realised he was in the wrong company. Did you see that guy in America who he didn't want to miss out on his first day at a removal company, and so he walked from two o'clock in the morning, walked to his first job of the day, and he took like seven hours to walk. A policeman picked him up and drove him to the job and basically explained the situation, and the CEO of the company was so impressed by his endeavours that he gave him a car.

He gave him his own car, in fact. Wow. Probably trying to get rid of his car, wasn't he? Yeah. A seven-hour walk for a new car, you'd do it. Yeah, but he didn't know he was going to get the new car, did he? You wouldn't do it. You can't drive.

I can walk, though. Yeah. You walk seven hours and I get a new car. Yeah, I walk seven hours and they go, oh, here's a car. And I go, I can't fucking drive. I saw us walking in the first bit, dickhead. I thought you were going to say...

Fucking idiot. And as a reward, they gave reward... You're a CEO. They gave him a promotion for a job that he was completely unqualified for. And he was fired. Yay. Anyway, we're back on Monday with the Luke and Pete show.

Again, of course, hello at lukeandpete.com to get in touch. We would love to hear from you. Say goodbye, Peter. Bye. And it's goodbye from me too. See you in August, bitches.