The Luke and Pete Show - Grey w*nk pants

Episode Date: June 3, 2024

This week, Luke and Pete kick starts your Monday with a deep dive into UK politics. Discussing everything from the duality of John Prescott, MP Lee Anderson's recent tirade against refugees, current PM Rishi Sunak's plan to bring back national service and even Lib Dem leader Ed Davey's run in with a paddle board - your new political correspondents cover it all. Following this, Luke also has some choice words about the UK government's young staffers...Elsewhere, Pete reminds us of Ronald Reagan's signature look. Plus, Luke has the perfect solution for a parcel thief - dog sh*t and broken glass, classic!Want to get in touch with the show? Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Follow us @thelukeandpeteshow.***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

it's the luke and the peach show i'm joined by mr lukey moore on this monday the 3rd of june how the freaking hell has it got to june without me noticing horrific horrific i can't speak for you noticing or not but june has come around fast um i think i would open this week and this show and this conversation by just reading the following to you that i read genuinely as a headline uh this morning you ready reform mp lee anderson it's already started good and that's yeah he's always good for a giggle isn isn't he? Suggest asylum seekers should be sent to one of the remote islands in the Hebrides along with building materials to set up their own camps.

He's basically Survivor, isn't he? Isn't that like Naked and Afraid on Discovery Channel? Am I alone here where I think to myself, I'll be up for that? I'd be up for going to that. Yeah, you like the Hebrides, yeah. I don't want to send anyone there, but I'm happy to go. Not with Litty. You're going to that yeah you like the Hebrides yeah beautiful I don't want to send anyone there but I'm happy to go

not with Lee you're going to help out made it absolutely clear not with Lee don't think about Lee as long as I know where Lee is if that's as far away as I can be from Lee

I'll do it yeah correct and why is Lee asking people to do stuff that he would no way be able to consider doing himself given that he can't go

about an hour without having a pint of Tetley's. Well, I mean, it's like Rishi's National Service, isn't it? To be fair, to give Lee his dues, it is rare you see a politician these days. We spoke about what television was like back in the 80s and the 70s. But it's rare these days you see middle-aged men pissed on the telly. And Lee very much did that the day that he resigned as an MP. So I do think he deserves some semblance of credit for that.

Right. Yeah, no, I completely agree. I was like, bringing drunk men back on Sky News. I think that's a fantastic thing. Speaking of the Rishi Sunak National Service thing, I saw an australian headline in response to that i'll read to you billionaire pom who looks like he'd blister moving the couch to inspire youth with military service he's just i mean he's he's he's the only one who's

even bothering to campaign everyone else is just like oh, oh, we're just going to stop doing this deal. Well, he's doing it. I mean, it's a long process, the old campaigning, but it just seems that he's kind of like, he's just doing policy, policy, policy, which means he doesn't have to travel around shaking hands with people because we found out he can't do that.

He tried to play football at a sports day. He tried to play football at a sports day he tried to play football at a sports day where's his parade where's his parade to be fair the thing that he was because the labour set up a tiktok channel and did a video of um of kirstarmer um i mean not being excellent i mean it was if i was competent for a middle-aged man at football yeah yeah but Yeah, but I think the way that they'd anchored the portrait orientation of the video meant that you couldn't really see where the ball was being hit. No, exactly. So if it was landscape, I'd be like, I'd get a bit more of a feel for, you know, it's hardly that Zidane film that came out with Mobweb.

To me, it was very newly promoted. Ipswich Town have been linked with an Argentinian wonder kid and the fans are going to put a YouTube compilation together over the top of a banging EDM track. Or Evanescence. Yeah, sometimes it's just always bring me to life by Evanescence. But it was a particularly kind of well-edited video. But the thing is, it didn't need to be good, does it?

That sums up the whole campaign at the moment and the whole situation. Labour don't need to do anything good. They just need to exist as vaguely sentient adult human beings. They need to not fall into any holes. Probably literally. Yeah, possibly even literally.

Ed Davey fell off a paddleboard the other day. I mean, Ed Davey shouldn off a paddle board the other day I mean Ed Davey shouldn't be paddle boarding I know he I know that no one's talking about them I know no one's talking

he can't get any press for love or money he has to do something like that he loves a photo shoot that guy he loves a bit of a bit of silliness at a photo shoot

so this is kind of in his wheelhouse but I would say that the the whole kind of like it just seems like, I think you had spoken about Rishi Sunak going to the Titanic,

something about the Titanic. Oh, he announced his campaign in the Titanic, or kicked off his campaign, sorry, in the Titanic quarter of Belfast Dockyard. Yeah, okay. Isn't he from Southampton? Isn't Southampton a more synergetic, synergetic? Well, that's where it's set itself from.

Yeah, so why not do whatever shop they've got about the Titanic down there? Because that's where you come from. Let me tell you something now, and they might be putting two or two together and getting five here, but I've got friends who work in this area and I've been to the Strangers Bar,

to different drinks things around Parliament, stuff like that, on more than one occasion. And all the young staffers around the Tory party, if you're sensitive to strong language, mute now, are cunts. Right, yeah. I wouldn't be surprised. And I mean obnoxious cunts.

Like you would be able to see them a mile off at the end of the bar. They're that bad, right? They're awful, awful people. You know that Rafe Hubris character, that comedian, I forget his name now. They're like that, anyway, when you look it up. So as a result, and like I say, I might be putting two together and getting five,

but I wouldn't be at all surprised if he is so weak so um on this you know one foot out the door that they are basically taking the piss out of him because they hate him they just need to usher it all out and get a new thing going because there's no there can be no other explanation for that if you did that if you did that if you wrote that in a script, like a screenplay, people would be like, no one's going to fucking believe that. What are you doing? Why do you need to extend the...

You could have called for this ages ago. And it doesn't make sense because they're running on immigrants and the economy and the economy's... We've only had one book on the economy, so why do it now? It seems that it's not long enough to add it doesn't make any logical sense his campaign let's be honest his campaign

has hardly been like reagan in 84 as it like where reagan carried every single state apart from walter mondale's home state of minnesota and then finished the whole thing off by in an interview from a friendly press interviewer asking Ronald Reagan what he wanted for Christmas, he just looked at the camera, winked and said, well, Minnesota would have been nice. Yeah. It's not that, is it? A pair of grey wank pants, please.

Yeah, well, he had them already. One French day of the week. Yeah. That's a great photo, isn't it? It's one of my favourite, because he's not as old as the beltline should, you know, explains, I would say. Back in the day,

men of that generation used to wear their trousers very high. They did, they did. But the grey wank pants he's sort of chosen are very grey. Any kind of stain is showing up and looks suspicious on those. And he's the president of the free world. It just seems absolutely insane. Do you not think it's because they weren't used to having as much press photographs and stuff like that yeah yeah my um my granddad my grandpa um my dad's dad is he passed away a long time ago now but he used to um

buy his t-shirts i guess he used to buy t-shirts wherever he used to get like yeah he used to wear like quite fashionable for the 90s t-shirts like naff naff t-shirts and spliffy t-shirts and stuff that he'd buy from I don't know where he'd buy them from but downtown and they used to pair

those t-shirts with like an old pair of like dress trousers pulled up really high with braces nice like that I think people

that look quite a lot yeah I mean that's Shoreditch isn't it that's you know massively they'd be like a 30 year old kid-old kid around East London

riding a fucking penny farthing. Yeah, fantastic. Bloody fantastic. So, yeah, elections upon us, Peter. Presumably you'll be voting for reform again, right? Reform, reform. I just want, I just want, I'm obviously keeping my powder dry

because Farage hasn't announced and he won't. But, you know, if he puts't but you know he said he's not going to do it well yeah and then the following day he said this is a time of grave emergency

for our country well why don't you stand then you fucking coward why don't you stand then silly because you don't make enough money

speaking of getting pissed on the telly he'd do that he'd do that I think he's yeah he's more of a he's clearly a champagne man but he'll drink

a pint of tellies he's a doom bar guy isn't he'll drink it no he's a he's a he's a doom bar guy isn't he nah he's secretly champagne isn't he i'm fairly certain he's like but he's that like the the amount of champagne you know like tom jones getting that man from the script um uh putting him in hospital with the amount of champagne that he's drinking kind of vibe i would say what about um when you're down the pint. Yeah, just impressive I would say. Downed it pretty fast as well. If you need to know what campaigning was like back in the 90s

and the early 90s, just see John Prescott downing a pint as quickly as possible. Or thumping a man. Or thumping a voter. Or thumping a man. Or admitting that he

very bravely admitted he had an eating disorder as well. The duality of Prescott is quite interesting. Just a great character. Just a great character. We don't have him them anymore everyone's a character but they're dangerous really dangerous yeah they're a character as far as like by character we mean they would complain

to the council about you oh yeah massively i yeah i've become very very interested in the next door dot couldn't you care app are you familiar with this so you told me about it before i've never used it i know what it is right well i will i don't know what i did but i typed in my email address so every morning i will get a little sort of digest of what people have been screeching about um on nextdoor.co.uk about things that have happened in my local area hot milfs, obviously. Constant threat. There are definitely some more hot milfs in your area.

Constant hot milfs around. Single? Probably, yeah. Single and ready to mingle. Hot to trot, so to speak. They don't write that on the advert. But I'm editorialising. Next door, keep sending me an email

and it'll just be like the the hot uh subject at the top and so you get these half stories and i've forgotten my login i've forgotten what the password is so even when i click on it i don't know where the story goes i don't know what the rest of the story is but the starts of some of the sentences are insane um and it's it comes in next door this was 24 minutes ago to the scumbag who has just pushed my 13-year-old son off his bike and... I will never know the rest of that story. Don't need it. I will never...

Yeah. What's the rules on bonfires, if any? My neighbour started a bonfire last. Never going to know the rest of that one. This is just your mind. Yeah. Does anyone know what's happened at the Mayor's Store in Canvey High Street? Police?

It's just... I mean, wow. I love it. Absolutely. Lovely walk over Hadley Castle. know what's happened at the mayor's store in canvey high street police it's just i mean wow i love it absolutely lovely walk over hadley castle thinking i would get some lovely fresh air but something bad's happened i'm never gonna know what it is i had a phone call from my doctor says they're saying the doctor wants to speak ah i want to know what that is it's like in the Alan Partridge thing where he's doing the people who email him with their romantic stories about how they met. And this woman emails him saying,

Sandra met John when Sandra was out in the woods walking her dog and John was just looking for something. Could be anything. In South Church Park this morning, I witnessed a man slapping and punching his... What was he slapping and punching? Penis. Penis.

Penis. Peter, round where I live, there's a big bit of drama. There's a parcel thief. Oh, beautiful. And he's been caught on loads of people's ring doorbells, right? Nice.

Dressed like the Hamburglar? Yeah, he looks exactly like the Hamburglar, yeah. And Grimace is his getaway driver. And no, we haven't

personally had anything stolen, but I understand it's a problem. I'm not making light of it. Of course, it's terrible because,

you know, it could be anything in the parcels. But people are like, you know, reporting it to the police, getting crime numbers or the rest of of it but the police won't arrest the guy i don't know why actually they should probably should but maybe they can't find him or whatever but i suggested to a couple of uh let's just say a couple of to a focus group of trusted neighbors

that what we should do is we should take our parcels in be careful not to damage the boxes take our products out the boxes yeah fill the boxes with dog turds broken glass yeah uh other unwanted undesirable items like that all of us and leave them out on the doorstep en masse and see how long it takes them to get bored of just taking boxes of dog shit home. The whole thing will be done within a week. Even if I'm not going to that road again, they're fucking wankers. Are you on your own?

Yeah, but then you've basically pulled a lot of dog poo into a box and it's your job. They're not going to take them and you're going to be responsibly... It's not my job, I'm the ideas man. Oh, that was your idea? I thought that was someone else coming up with that idea. Filling it with dog poo.

If we live together, I'll be convinced you to do that. Right. I mean, you'd be collecting the dog poo, slicing up dog poo bags and putting them in an Amazon box. Pete, the fucking road is covered in dog shit anyway. You might as well put it to good use. Just may as well scooping it up.

That would put the guy off though, right? I think he'd be able to smell it. It would be greasy in the bottom of the Amazon package. What I'm saying is

if he comes down the street one day and there's, you know, 70 boxes. Yeah. 45 of them have got dog poo

and glass in them And glass Like he's just going to jam his hand really quickly and oh what have I got here One of them's got

a pop up jack in the box which frightens him a bit He's not going to want to come back There's loads of roads in South London He'd go somewhere else I'll tell you

Do you know who's complaining the most by the way The woman with the fucking cone Oh nice Okay She's complaining about most, by the way? The woman with the fucking cone. Oh, nice. Okay. Well, she's complaining about

that someone's going to steal her. I mean, to be honest, if you had a car blocking the view of your doorstep, you might, people might not steal your boxes, eh? Yeah, exactly. Exactly right.

So I'll keep you posted on that. What's that group for the roads gone mental for it? All I was trying to do was sell a baby bouncer. I can't get any traction. No. What are you asking for a baby bouncer. I can't get any traction. No. What are you asking

for a baby bouncer? I might sit in it and get bounced. It's a good one. Who doesn't like getting bounced? I've actually sold it. I think I've sold it now for 70 quid.

Fwoah. Yeah. Fwoah. What are you going to do with that scratch? Buy another bigger one? Yeah, probably a bigger bouncer. Is that the one

that hangs on the door? On the door frame? No, no, no, no. Right. This is like a baby bouncer. What would I call the thing that hangs on the door, on the door frame? No, no, no, no. Right. This is like a baby Bjorn bouncer. What would I call the thing that hangs on the door frame? I'd call that a... It's a baby bouncer.

He bounces a baby. This is like a bouncy chair kind of thing. Is that the one that kind of like rotates? I've seen them. They're like absolute bougie... No, it doesn't do that. No. Right, okay.

But it is a baby Bjorn one, so it's like 200 quid. Bloody hell. It's actually, it's genuinely a bargain, because our son wasn't that into it. So we haven't actually used it that much. He's too big for it now. I'm going to find it on Facebook marketplace. But anyway, just very quickly on the WhatsApp group,

what's happened is a good percentage of the people who live on our street don't know who the parcel thief is. Right, yeah. They haven't seen him, right? Right. Well, I mean, they wouldn't. He's a parcel thief. Any photo of a ring doorbell footage

is, like, really grainy, right? So now people, it's just a set of the people just dropping messages in the group asking if a person they've just seen could be the parcel thief. Oh, no, they're tearing each other apart. For example, like this, right?

A young guy I've just seen didn't have a bag or looked to be actively stealing, but could possibly be ready to relieve the bag if necessary. I may be wrong but he looked dodgy so everyone just be extra careful. It's just a bloke. You live in London mate.

These people have probably lived their whole lives in London and this is... I just assume the people... This sounds like people who lived out in the sticks and have moved into London. Do you know what I mean? That's the kind of vibes for me because you're in London and, you know, you take the rough with the smooth.

You have to. You have to. You have to. Careful answering your phones, guys. Had three missed calls from a mobile. That's all you get. That's all you get. Yeah.

Pete, let's have a break. When we come back, I've got a few questions from listeners that I asked for on Instagram. We're going to go through those, okay? Farewell. Avoid the 8127 south end bound. The dumped caravan has now been set on fire. It is the Luke and Pete show.

Welcome back to it. We're going to pile through some of your emails if that's all right with you. Yeah, let's do some rapid fire stuff, Pete. All right. Okay? So I'm going to do a couple of emails and I'll do a few messages, all right? All from josh is good morning lads just wanted to email to

let you know that a few years back now i had to take my mum to the hospital with a very tight chest brackets don't worry she's fine cool we are both ventolin users and we're shocked to be told by the doctor at a and e that if required you can use your ventolin up to 20 times in a row. Oh my fucking Christ. So the guy Pete saw having four or five blasts was well within his limit. 20 times?

Is it that weak? 20 times? Don't do it now. Well, I've got my brick in. 20 times? Yeah. Hang on. There we go.

That's loading the chair. That's loading the chair. There's only 100 in the bleed thing. I'm not wasting it. Only 100 in the clip. Oh, there we go. I knew she'd laugh. That's loading the chair. That's loading the chair. There's only 100 in the thing. I'm not wasting it. Only 100 in the clip. Oh, yes. Russian roulette. That is nice.

It's like a vape, but for really seriously ill people. Ventolin. What about this from Sam? I've recently moved house and need some garden furniture. Can you bring it up to the lakes next time you're up? Thanks, Sam. I mean, it's hard to see what I'm getting out of that, Sam. I do like going to the Lake District.

I won't be able to fit it in my car. What are you going to put in your car? Sorry, I was... Garden furniture. Remember I told you last week I wanted to get rid of some. Yes, you were trying to palm off some garden furniture onto me. It's actually really nice garden furniture. It's just on reflection a bit too big for the garden,

so I wouldn't mind just getting some more stuff that's limited in size. Smaller stuff like little baby seats. This is from Jesse. Does Pete consider himself one of the great

British eccentrics? No, I think I am. I'm in training I think. But I think what Jesse's getting at here is that the stuff you do at the time and in hindsight, with hindsight, do you think it's regular, normal stuff? No, I think that it's I am becoming a dad.

This is what dads do. They do stuff because they think it's the best course of action at the time and they forget that people are watching them do you know what i mean like if somebody would say dance like no one's watching i'm doing hobbies like no one's watching but you were doing this stuff when you were like 25 yeah exactly so i'm yeah exactly this is my kind of i'm i'm i'm crawling out of the um of the cocoon and i'm kind of like you know i'm about to flap my wings into being full on like mad dad. I think when people see,

so you do generally, when you're making the effort, you do dress very well. And I think when you do dress in a slightly more eccentric way than most people. And I think people might just see the packaging and go,

this guy's an eccentric guy. But I think if they listen to the Luke and Pete show, they'll definitely feel like you aren't a common or garden individual. Right, okay. But I think if they listen to the Luke and Pete show, they'll definitely feel like you aren't a common or garden individual. Right, okay. I mean, it's hard for me to comment on myself. So you say no,

you're not going to consider yourself, you don't, there's no self-awareness about what you do. I think I'm hitting middle age and I'm treating it with the respect it deserves. What do you think

you're going to get into when you get a bit older? What's going to be your thing? Oh, I've done cars now, haven't I? I've got sports. But you're not into cars. You've just bought a car, which is mental. That's it.

Luke, I'm on a WhatsApp group where people talk about cars constantly. I don't know why. They added me and they just... No, it's the WhatsApp one. How did you get on that? It's the Toyota Century WhatsApp group. And all they do...

Oh, I've got to hear more about this. All they do is... They have like a big... They had a big meeting recently I think and they all drove their 20th centuries to a man's cottage

in the middle of nowhere because they were attending a car meet the next day and it's just they just took pictures of each other's cars it's so funny

but you want it in case you need to ask any advice on how to fix something yeah exactly yeah they're a great resource. How many people are on it? I don't know, I think there's about 20, I think.

But they're all full-on dads. Going for a cruise to the cottage? No, that's not really my vibe. I don't want to talk to anybody. I'll talk to them when I need help with something. It's just not very positive. I have, to be fair, a couple of times when people have asked

stuff on the facebook forum i have said i had this problem this is how i fixed it there we go so i'm adding to the the bank of knowledge for a car that nobody really knows about what's the what's the kind of buyer profile for people with that car um i think it's kind of like people who like jdm japanese domestic market cars i think they're kind of that people who like JDM, Japanese domestic market cars. I think they're kind of... What is that, Peter? That's the first time I've ever heard that phrase. It's a car that's only released in Japan. Yeah, I know that, but what does that tell you about the people who buy them?

I think they're just Top Gear heads. As I said before, Sarah hates the sort of men who wave at me in the car. And it's very funny to watch her squirm how many people waved at you that time when you drove down to cornwall oh all the time someone gave me the rock horns like people would like you know people went that's as i was pulling out a quick fit a few weeks ago a man pounded a bit too hard, his hand on the bonnet and shouted, that's the Nat's son. How old was he? Old enough to not pound on people's,

you know. What did you say? I can imagine how awkward you would have been then. That's my, oh, thank you. That's what I mean, like, he's like,

oh, thank you. But you got, it's not your, you didn't make it. I know, you just bought it. Yeah, pathetic. That's what my granddad used to say

about mobile phones. Why are you guys always looking at each other's mobile phones? You just bought them. Anyone could do that. Yeah, exactly. Completely agree. It's pathetic behaviour. But when you drove down to Cornwall,

I meant to ask you, how many times did you have to fill up the petrol tank? Because I'm not sure what kind of petrol it takes. I mean, I know it's petrol, but I'm not sure whether I have to stick to the posh stuff or the normal stuff. Yeah, it was about two times to get to Cornwall. He's got a V12 engine, hasn't he?

He's got a V12 engine. That was the man, Sarah. There's a man talking to me at a garage forecourt a couple of years ago. There was a man outside talking about that car, wasn't there? I went, yes. What, is that all the conversations you have now? Honestly, it's the only conversations I have with strangers is talking about the car that I'm driving.

My God. How much did it cost you in petrol to drive down to Cornwall, just to drive down there? A couple of hundred quid. Oh, my God. Is that not usual kind of Cornwall fare? It cost me like 70 quid to fill up my entire tank. Right, okay.

Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, it's a long journey. It's a long journey and we had some great times. Anyway, Pete doesn't consider himself to be one of the great British eccentrics, Jesse, but I think that conversation there will confirm to you without any shadow of a doubt that he is.

What about this from Adam? What was Pete's morning routine when he had to go to school? I feel like a morning routine as a school kid was very formative. Right, okay, that's interesting, yeah. Were you a big breakfast kid or were you like... Up before everyone else, eating frozen sausages, as discussed. Did you watch The Big Breakfast with Johnny Vaughan? Yeah, a lot of telly.

Get up early for cartoons and telly. I was watching cartoons a lot later than everybody else because I had a real deep love for animation and stuff. And so I'd be doing a lot of that, a lot of Big Breakfast. I had to watch it

until Ben the Boffin did his video game tips before I would leave. Oh, yeah. And actually, I would do my paper round. I would do that. Why paper rounds

needed to be happening at five o'clock in the morning for a child? I do not know that. I would do it that way. Why paper rounds needed to be happening at five o'clock in the morning for a child? I do not know that. I used to do that as well. Mad. And I'd come home and I'd put the fire on and I'd lay down in front of it in me robe, scorch the robe because I got too close to it

and just sleep and listen to Chris Evans on Virgin or whatever and just kind of listened to an hour of that. And some of my formative kind of memories of listening to, I think, Roxette, the song that they did for the Mario Brothers soundtrack, Almost Unreal, I think it's called. Real lovely song and it really reminds, it's really evocative of me lying down

in front of a roaring gas fire as I did a little more sleeping before I went to school. And then I'd walk across this horse's field and then I'd go to school. So there you go. So how long would it take you to walk to school? It's a long time. I think it was about 40 minutes or things. Good old walk.

Yeah, so mine was like 25 minutes. And we used to walk here, rain or shine, every single fucking day. Yeah. Mad, isn't it? That's nice, though. That's good. It's nice. That is fun.

I remember my paper round. I don't know if it's worked the same way as you, but I used to get £7.50 a week on a Saturday, right? And if I'd done the Sunday papers as well, I used to get 11 quid because I'd do two runs on the Sunday papers. That's Southern waiting, that. That is London waiting kind of delivery money. Mate, how many papers

was your round I'd have to go back twice I'd have to go back twice to pick them up and how much did you get paid it was in the threes I think

threes or four quid wow okay so I was £7.50 my round was 43 papers I remember I used to get it in the bag all in the bag

in a weekday and I i do it on my bike so i could i know obviously after a while as i'm sure you know you learn it off by heart yeah so you could do it yeah on the sunday used to go back a second time and i used to have to do that but that didn't even take the most time the thing is at the most time was taking all the supplements out the papers and putting them through one by one oh yeah in the us they all they all come wrapped in plastic and chuck them in the garden so that was

but anyway the most brutal thing and the guy should never have done this and it's only more recently I've realised that actually

that was a scam really so he gets £7.50 a week and I wouldn't always do Sundays if I did Sundays I'd get £11 so I guess it was

£3.50 for the Sunday round which makes sense because it was brutal. Anyway, but during, I used to get paid on a Saturday morning, but during the week, he would let me go in the shop and get a chocolate bar or a can of pop or whatever.

And he would just take it off the slate. Right? Yeah, I had a slate of mine. Yeah, but basically invariably on Saturday morning, I'd go go in do my papers get paid and it'd be like oh mate here you go and they'd be like 72p and it would just be absolutely soul destroying because i'd have to go back to my parents who'd be like well you've got a paper where's all your money gone yeah and i know so any any uh if you're paying like um trade

price fine but you're not higher. I'm paying retail. He's getting profit off that. Outrageous. I remember, though, you used to get a drifter. Do you remember drifters? Can you still get them? Nah, they died a long time ago.

And a packet of soft mints, tree ball soft mints. That's a weird, claggy mess. What are you doing? For 50p. I wouldn't eat them at the same time, would I? Chocolate and mint. I wouldn't eat them at the same time, Peter. No, but it sounds like they were both in your gullet at the same time would I? Chocolate and mint I wouldn't eat them at the same time Peter It sounds like they were both in your gullet You'd eat them in similar times

wouldn't you? Speaking of formative stuff like that, have you had a chance to watch that Wayne Rooney interview with Gary Neville yet? I've not, no, but he whereas when you guys were talking about his kind of appearance on the nation's football media,

I was a little bit reluctant because I was a bit like, well, you know, he's just one of those weird old football men in a young body kind of jobs, isn't he? But he has been nothing but charming this week. He has been brilliant. He's amazing. There's a bit where he does a bit about Mika Richards going to Wings celebrating 50 appearances in the Premier League or something.

I think Mika said it was 50ings celebrating 50 appearances in the Premier League or something. I think Mika said it was 50 goals. He didn't score 50 goals. No, it was 50 appearances. 50 appearances, yeah. 50 appearances in the Premier League. And I just like how readily he's allowing himself

to ship his friends and enemies back in the Premier League. I bloody love it. But he used... In this interview with Gary Neville, first of all,

they're walking in this beautiful countryside, right? And I thought, oh, he's just grabbed him after a game of golf or something. Yeah.

Right. And no, that's ruined his fucking house. I got him. It's like, what I love about it is he is basically

living in like a modern aristocratic stately home yeah he's amazing rolling meadows yeah it's incredible but anyway he was saying that um he came from um obviously came from a very tough background and and um he said that he was such a good player when he was a kid that everton would give him a ticket to goodison park every week even when he was like eight or nine years old. Right. Get him, get him codified.

Yeah. Because it was Everton and because of the time, the year it was, they only give him one ticket. So he had to go on his own. So his mum and dad used to give him a pound 50, right? Because that's all they could afford to give him. And he had to decide whether he got the bus there

and walked back or walked there and got the bus back. Okay. Right. And I looked it up on Google Maps. It's like an hour and 10 minute walk. He's like eight years old. And he goes,

yeah, I always used to walk both ways so I'll keep the money to buy some sweets. I just thought, you're not going to hear Phil Foden say that story. He's dreaming of a big lolly.

Yeah, exactly. I just want a big lolly. The big lolly definitely feeds its way into the Rooney myth. Yeah. I just hope he's notlly. The big lolly definitely feeds its way into the Rooney myth. Yeah. I just hope he won't let us down by saying something silly. I just think he might have it in him.

I don't know why. I just think that... I get the impression he's like a very kind-hearted bloke. That's what I mean. But he'll say something that disappoints people and he'll get too defensive about it and then he'll ruin his media legacy. But I think he is a loose cannon

and he's going to say something bad. I know what you mean. My impression, if I feel like I know the man as well as I think I do, the only thing bad

that's going to happen is he's going to chin someone. Yeah, probably, yeah. I love it. Absolutely love it. If he turns around and chins someone

he doesn't like in the football world, he ain't getting cancelled for that. No, no. If anything, he doesn't like in the football world, he ain't getting cancelled for that. No, no. If anything, he would reward him in many ways. I've enjoyed it. More Rooney in the Euros.

I also love the way he looks. Yeah, he just looks like a proper man. A proper man. It's not that I'm not... People think I mean that in a sarcastic way or that I'm like criticized. I genuinely love that a man who up until I think two and a half years ago was a professional athlete.

Yeah. And he's 38 years old, can look like that. Yeah. He just looks amazing. He looks like the uncle that will give you a 20 quid yeah well he hasn't got it he's younger than me and i feel like he looks like my uncle it's amazing i love him and i hope he doesn't let us down i completely agree with you i hope he

doesn't let us down i just think he's a he just seems like a great breath of fresh air love it anyway a breath of fresh air let's get out of here peter take it take us uh take us home do get your batch brands coming in. Hello at LukeandPeteShaw.com. We're on TikTok. We're on the old YouTube. You can find us on socials. Just type in Luke and Pete Shaw.

And we're the ones who aren't the other ones. You can't tell me it's not a man who's going to go down to Plymouth and have a nice time. Is a man ever been more Plymouth than that? Yeah. Yeah, he looks like a man who basically left the armed forces a long time ago, but just loves the vibe. Becomes a porter.

Just into the culture. Just into the culture. See you later. All right then. Bye. The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack production and part of the ACAST Creator Network.