The Luke and Pete Show - Hand Warmers of Various Types

Episode Date: January 8, 2026

Hello and welcome back to what feels like a podcast at the end of the world. Put it this way, Pete is desperate to know where he can secure regular asthma medication from as we edge ever closer to the abyss.In the meantime, the lads still find time to talk about purchasing paint, why you shouldn't urinate in the sink, and Axl Rose's performing habits. There's also adverts for soup, a very welcome New Year's appearance from Battery Robot, and the question on everyone's lips - will Luke and Pete invade Greenland?New Year, new questions? Only one place to put them: [e-mail] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the Luke and Pete Short. My name is Pete Donaldson. The date is the 8th of January 2026. And I'm joined by Mr. Loki Moe. Looky Moe, how the devil are you doing? Come on, Peter, give me a piece of your love. Whoa, whoa. What's that?

Come on, Peter, give me a piece of your love? Not the Peter bit, obviously. I presume that wasn't part of the song. That would be confusing. I think, come on, girl, give me a piece of you. your love. I feel like it's a 90s. Remember that 90s kind of pop reggae vibe that went on?

Okay. Give me some. Get me some reggae. Well, like U.B. 40 kind of thing. That's Axel Rose doing doing knock on heaven's door, isn't it? Yeah. I've actually witnessed that in person. Good. You've witnessed Axel. You've not lived as a music fan until you've been to see Guns and Roses when it's

just Axel and all these mates. Come on stage at like 10.45pm and then do a really long version of knock on heaven's door when Axel screams give me some reggae halfway through pre-night tube oh mate when I saw him at Hammers of Apollo

he's basically doing a cod reggae accent for most of the show from what I remember in between songs I don't know why and by the time they came on stage the crowd were shouting fuck off Axel fuck off Axel

and the loads of people left about song in because of the tube and stuff it was definitely pre-nightly it was like 15 years ago. Yeah, do you not think that they will be, forget about a knock on Heavens, they'll be knocking on the old, the time in which the Hammersmith, Palais, or whatever, the Hammersmith, the Polo has to stop, stop playing music, presumably. So you didn't get a shot at set.

No, it's not as catchy. You're quite right. You're quite right. I said, well, you're, automatically, your mind is going straight to what's the licensing issue here? What's the licensing issue? What's the PRS license? Exactly.

Exactly. I don't think Axel cares about that. No. Good point. Why would it? Have you been, Luke? I'm good. I'm good.

I'm good. Reminiscing about guns and roarses in the past. Well, listen, Chateau-Mormont, as the house is known, is on the market. Right. So we're going to try and move house. And as a result, it turns out that a lot of jobs that I'm ill-suited for need to be done almost immediately. Yeah. So you've been, you ran over to be in Q.

Yeah, I was a fish up a tree, mate. Fish of a tree. But you were picking up some paint for some jobs. and my point is that if I come and you view a house and I'm not stupid like me and I'm clever like not me or the person I want to be is I would smell a fresh paint and go what's going on there?

Can I smell polyfiller? Can I smell some paint there? What's going on? I mean, to me it's they're trying to sell the house they've given it a lick of paint. Good on them. Yeah, good point. Yeah, good point.

It's not like, oh, all of a sudden, oh, this paint must be hiding a multitude of sins. There's a couple of things that need to be touched up. It's an old house. These things happen. There's, uh, on the, um, on the stairwell from the, um, first floor to the loft bit, there is a lot of like, you can see it in sunshine where they've sort of patched up. They've done some polyfill here in and they've painted over some, uh, some, some, some, some, some, um, except they're not scratches.

they are nails where they nailed up what kind I can only describe as the dad of the house, the one who had the affair, et cetera, et cetera, his Paul Weller photograph collection. So every time I walk down the stairs, I think of Paul Weller. Well, because you got that house because there was a divorce. Well, no, no, I mean, yeah, I'm pretty much, yeah. That's why certainly I've got a cabin in the end of the garden. But yeah, he used to have like a shrine to Paul Weller and the jam. all the way up the stairs.

And it's not something I think about a lot, but every time I do see, every time the light catches the patch up paint that someone's done, I do think of Paul Weller and his shitty haircut. Well, you remember the Paul Weller shrine from when you came to look at the place? Exactly, yeah.

They left the Paul Weller shrine up, did they? They did, yeah. Sarah said, Sarah tried to curry favor with them by saying that she'd interviewed him, which we both had. I didn't mention my interview. Well, you interviewed Paul Weller famously for the honor, not the glory.

Sarah will be listening to this and I am better than that and she knows that I've said that you're better than that on that specific on that very specific You're like an old veteran that stormed the beaches at Normandy you only talk about it with fellow

with fellow veterans of Paul Weller interviews So Sarah yeah right about everything else but she will know that was a law point but she reckoned she got money off because she mentioned that she'd interviewed

Paul Weller I don't think she did I've got no beef for Sarah and beyond that I even find myself instinctively team Sarah on these debates but I think that is doubtful. Right, yeah I mean it certainly didn't make a sewage

access point extension insurance snafu any easier late on I thought that might have kind of greased the wheels of negotiation but we've got the house Let's just go in the wild wild wood together

I'm only buying this house because I didn't get one on Stanley Road This insurance does something to me This buildover insurance Since I've looked around this house I'm a changing man I'll tell you what I'd love that to be a problem with the sewer I'd love them to take up the floorboards in the kitchen As long as they put them back properly

That's what I want That's what I want Awful I see what you mean so you could kind of engineer some work being done on someone else Yeah Yeah exactly I'm going to flush Wet wave after wet wave down the toilet. See what happens.

So it could take no more. Exactly, exactly. I, um, someone was, um, I was, I went on a deep dive the other day about how stuff. Not in the sewer. No, no, metaphorical. How to, um, how to, you know, do this, that and the other around houses when you're sending one. Right. And, um, some reason I got a, um, into a Reddit thread about houses.

And it was a plumbing, like plumbing, I guess it was like a plumbing subreddit or whatever. Everyone's got a fucking opinion that, haven't they? Oh my God. Yeah. But this one guy was going on a real big, like, passionate rant about how he can always tell if people have been pissing in the sink. Because the U-Ben, well, because the U-Ben isn't suited for, like, a certain type of, like, uric acid or something. Right. It goes to a very rapid build-up.

Of what? Surely the Uric acid will clean out. I guess some kind of acid that's in the urine. Right. Okay. And so he said, oh, it was basically saying that if I have to go to the house and change a U-Ben on the sink, I can tell if it's because someone's. been pissing in it. Right.

How many times can you piss? You'd have to piss. So this is like not just pissing in the sink, do they? Yeah. I mean, you'd have to exclusively piss in the sink for that, but the case. Surely, surely. I think, but I think some people might do that. I think he's a purport.

Potentially, particularly in the north of England. There was a, I remember at university, some people had sinks in their room. Now, if he would have had a field day with that, Euracassiz. I had a sink in one room at university in the hall. And how many times did you... It's not my vibe. I don't, I don't believe that for a second. It's not my thing.

Hey, Grock, delete the liar. Oh, no, I'm trying to turn you down. I can't. Shit. Someone, I saw someone, um, describe, describe, I can't get this right. Someone described Twitter as a, what did they call it? Like, former social media and now, um, AI revenge porn. app or something like that.

It's now just become an absolute... I mean, it's sunk to even more depth than we all thought possible. Yeah, and had a great time to do it as well. It's it. I had a great time. When the world's on fire,

even more on fire than we thought it was last week, it's even better to be doing it now. It gets worse and worse, doesn't it? By the way, on the sink pissing thing, I've got a quick anecdote that I remember when I was, I once at Fulham,

watching Fulham versus Manchester City. and before the game was in the pub I don't want to name you at the pub because I can't quite remember I don't want to besmirch their reputation because it's a nice pub Is it the crab tree?

It might be the crab tree Right, okay Lovely pub Doesn't deserve what happened to it in this story And because there was a load of football fans around Before the game Yeah

There was a big queue for the gents Right So I'm in the queue for the gents behind a bloke and about I don't know like an eight or nine year old boy in his Fulham kit and around about a load of

Man City fans and I'm going to assume this chap was a man city fan by his accent so I hope that's not too unfair on the good community of Manchester City fans generally but this guy I think was a Man City fan and he was pissing in the sink in the toilet because he didn't want to wait

and this bloke fullam fan dad just said to the guy quite politely do you mind not doing that because my son's my son's here you know it's not setting a great example there you know we've got to wait for the toilet blah blah blah and the man set you found like did his flies up looked at her and I just went

fucking hell you know you're in London now don't you I think that's that's uh assuming that's the best you're going to get that is the best you're going to get yeah but he's basically implying that that's just a regular thing in Manchester pissing in the sink and I don't think it is because Manchester is a great city I think people are better than that No, I don't believe that either.

In the words of Angald D. Maria's wife, I want to kill myself because it's, what do you say? It's night time at 2pm. It's night time at 2pm. It's back to the whole Coleman's mustard, it's back to the whole Coleman's mustard eaten by Americans, kind of a little bit of British pride. When someone has a real go at the weather, I go, yes, yes. Shuck it up. Proud.

Never proud. Never prouder. My mate who was around earlier, he was saying to me on the damp thing, he was saying that he works in property and he was saying it's crazy how much damp there is in houses all over London. Yeah. Because the housing stock is quite old. Right.

People didn't run showers for that long. The heating wasn't really a thing. And it's just condensation all the time. He said he got to the point now when he works on a house or whatever, just tiles the whole fucking thing. Don't bring any war in the bathroom, he said. Yeah, just always tirelet, yeah. Because it's just not, they're just not built. These older houses, it's not built for that shit.

No, no, I totally agree. And I would sort of, um, the thing that gets me is that there's no, certainly in my, both bathrooms don't have any, um, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, what are you doing? You're just, you're just going to be wet and

moistening the joist. I don't even know who I ask to get that fixed. That's beyond... I've looked at where I can get that out but it just seems absolutely impossible. It seems absolutely mad, doesn't it? Absolutely crazy. The thing is you get box jobs, don't it?

I told you this a million times before. Regular listeners to this show will be familiar. Like, the amount of box jobs in this house when I moved in, it's just crazy. I told it was propped up on two pairs of wire clippers and then just fucking corked around. Yeah, completely... This feels weird.

This toilet feels weird when you're sitting on it. Just pulled it out. Fucking two pairs of wire clippers just to even it up. insane but first of all first of foremost if you're a rational actor in that situation

you don't want to give up two pairs of wire flippers um now I mean a rational actor are there in any in that particular

situation though I'm saying they're not a rational actor are they because if they were they wouldn't have dream to leaving that stuff there would they that makes a very

very good point and by the way speaking of the weather did you have you had this story about George Orwell I read it earlier I could just stuck in my mind to talk to you about today.

George Orwell, who's apparently known has been a very down-to-earth, kind of modest chat. He's a very endearing habit, apparently, on a cold day in London. Have you heard that? Have you heard the story? No. So apparently he would get up in the morning and on a cold winter's morning or whatever.

And in preparation for his walk to work, he would boil two eggs hard boil eggs right right let me guess he put them in his pocket for warmth yeah I used to use him as hand warmers right

and then he'd snaffle him for his breakfast or his lunch or whatever when he got there that's a great idea and much better than my plan twin dog poos in each pocket in a bag presumably yeah in a bag do you use those as a little hand warmer do you

look on a cold day it's a little secret hand warmer for us You get, oh, you're on a cold day, you get, you get the warmth where you can. Exactly, exactly. I love the idea of that. You've been stuck in a so-called survival situation. Guys, what I'm thinking to preserve warmth here, what, we all huddle together? Nah, dog shit.

Exactly, exactly. I was, I was in a summer... Let's make ourselves look like Arnold Schwarzenegger at the end of Predator. In my, in my, uh, repeated working up at 5am, uh, worrying about things as diverse as Nator and where I would get my, um, asthma meds in the, in the, um, in the, um, um, event of some kind of terrible war. Italy turns out the asthma inhalers come from, so that's slightly more positive news

I would say. But... Trust the Italians in a war situation. You're out of your mind. Out of your mind. It's the worst case scenario. I know, right? Oh, God. Yeah, I genuinely am sort of thinking... Oh, they'll say you some aspirinhalers one week. The next week, I'll be selling them to the other side.

Apologues to what Italian business to this show. They know it's a bit of fun, probably, possibly. Yeah, might buy some big tins. Do you honestly get anxiety about world events? I understand a lot of people do. Well, it's nice to mix it up, really, I suppose. Sometimes it's my own events. Sometimes it's my family events.

Sometimes it's world events. But mainly, I mean, the last few days have been trying for anyone who exclusively watches liberal political YouTube and listens to the e-podcast and stuff it's uh is it not a solution just to not bother uh you know what's going on though in it it's it's quite it's quite an interesting little tv show and i think one person knows that and that's why he's doing it i suppose if you've got termites in your house you probably want to know where they are exactly yeah yeah yeah i um i don't tend to get anxiety about that kind of stuff i get anxiety about other stuff but not about yeah but you don't see you don't get like job secure

near tall you don't seem to sort of worry about that sort of stuff I'm like I'd love a bit I'd love to be able to sort of treat that as my anxiety is far close to the home I've got some kind of debilitating illness with my son of asleep past

4.30 in the morning does my wife what does my wife hate me for at a moment what's all those yeah but all of those things all of those things could be solved you know will be solved and revealed Well, my wife's American, if anything, I should be blaming her.

Exactly. You've got, will you be in present, Luke? It's possible, isn't it? I've got a good friend of mine who's very active in politics in the US, and he's not of American descent. Of course, most Americans aren't of American descent, but you know what I mean? He's very obviously not of American descent.

And although he was born in the US, and I obviously send him the old, But the thing is, you've got to remember that as a broad rule, British people, the American people, deal with crises very differently, right? So we tend to inject humour into proceedings. They don't readily do that. And obviously, when you've got the added lack of nuance and context with, and tone with WhatsApp, I occasionally send stuff to him.

Yeah. Like, I think I sent one to him the other day, which was... I already know I'm going to say the sentence, how have you still got friends? Oh, yeah. Well, maybe he doesn't consider us friends. You have a ruthless aggression. It's not meant to be aggressive.

It's meant to be fun. Right. He sent me a message saying, because he sent me a message saying he was watching Master and Commander on a flight. And he said, there's a load of references to Portsmouth, and I thought of you. And I was like, all right, mate, yeah, nice one.

Happy New Year. And he said, oh, I'm going to over to the UK soon. So I was catch up. And I was like, oh, yeah, let me know when you're over and we'll definitely hang out if you haven't been sent to a colony in Venezuela by then, lull. Right, yeah, okay. That was

that got, sounds like I let him go well, right. Four days ago. I'm on red. I've been left on red. I don't think you're going to have that point. What do you reckon? I don't know. Well, I think there's a number of different eventualities may have come to pass. One is he has been renditioned

to Venezuela. It's a good point, actually, yeah. When's his last scene? He's a bit busy. And three, or three, he's taken offense to it. But he doesn't know me, so I want them actually take offence to it. He does know you, right, okay, that's fair. Yeah, but it's a fair comment by you to say that, you know, why the fuck is he still friends with me eyes? What we need is a picture of you in those blinkers that Maduro had on and a Nike sports jacket.

My favourite meme of that was just him there with his blinkers on, his blindfold, his headphones, and ear defenders, and they're just holding up a West Ham shirt. I mean, I'll tell you what, it's kind of backfied a little bit because he does look a bit cool. My mate said to me... He's a big old lad, and he's bigger than a lot of the Marines that are sort of dragging him in, and you're like, he looks pretty fucking cool. My mate said to me the other day, he said he watched as much as he could of the court appearance, right? And said, he came away thinking, Maduro seems like a great dude, and I'd love to have him on the grill at my barbecue. He said he seems so...

Obviously, he's an awful man, and he's caused untold suffering to Venezuela's like, I understand that. I know I'm being frivolous, but he has got a very evuncular nature about him. But it's that kind of, yeah, but it's that kind of, like, charisma that a dictator, tin pot at that, that you wish for the Americans over Trump. Do you know what I mean? Like, you sort of go, you shouldn't, you shouldn't have to put up with this. This guy should, this guy should be a passionate person who can sort of, you know, speak for more than three minutes on one subject and not run out of things to say and not weave in and out of subjects.

Luke and Pete show. Logan Peach Show. You do deserve a better podcast. That's the title. And you do sort of look at people like that. And you go, well, look, he's, he's, he's, he's a better class of dictator than, you know, the leader of the free world, sort of speaking. This is a stretch.

This is a stretch from you. Even for you, this is big. This is, you run out of steam. You are in your heart on that towards the end, was it? You kind of just took child off. I've been up at 5M. We're worrying about Aison, haven't I? Not ice and fucking hell, Greenland.

Iceland now Mr Trump Mr President We didn't go and get that territory That's the good news You won't know the fucking difference Very little resistance The bad news is

It's erupting Yeah Yeah What a shit Who knows what's going to happen Honestly you can't take your eyes on it for a second Who knows how big Because the projections and stuff

Who knows what's bigger Growing Greenland and Iceland It is Greenland It is Greenland The maps make it look massive Yeah. It's about like a couple of times the size of Texas or something. It's not that, it looks, if you like, it looks like Africa, the size of Africa.

Because that's because of the stretch. Because of the stretch. But it's, but it's quite clearly not. And it's quite clearly not. But you do want someone to get in Trump's here and go, mate, it's not that big. You do realize it's not actually that big. It looks big.

It looks big, but it's not that big. And it's not green. It's not green. It's fucking white, mate. It's as white as, it's as what? It's just a big lump of ice. But it's really why. It's probably why he wants it.

Definitely what Stephen Miller wants it. All right. Let's have a break. When we come back, we've got a battery entry. All right, then. There were some people out there, by the way, Peter. We were saying in 2026, it couldn't still be done, his battery stuff.

It can, and it will be done after this. Good. We're back with a little Peter show. Let's talk batteries daddy. Philip Riley has got in touch. Hi, boys. Let's get the battery daddy going on again or going again. Come on.

Where's the battery robot? I haven't said a happy new year to the battery robot yet. Oh, not that. Jesus Christ. No, not that. Jesus Christ. No. Both are apt. Hello. Hey. Happy New Year, everyone.

BR, how's it going? Ah, fine. What do you do for New Year? I travel to Las Vegas for the consumer electronic show. Oh, yeah? Is your pull? Loads of robot pus. Battery robot. Come on.

It's a family show battery robot. It's a family show battery robot, honestly. Goodness sake. Right. Anyway, what we feeding him today? We're feeding him some, I feel like these have been seen before repeatedly. But, Philip, thank you for your email. Gadsal, Lango, Leibonsdauer.

I don't know what that means. Langer Leibonsdauer, Gadsal. Gadsale. All right, Philip. Thank you for sending these in. You are the second person to send them in. I appreciate that you sent them in basically on Christmas. So you're obviously bored already from the time off.

But we first saw these back in June. We've only had them twice. And the first time was June of last year. So you're not far off the mark, but you're not a new player, I'm afraid, Philip. But thank you very much for sending in those gad cells. They're a rare beast, but they ain't unique. That's a stronger entry than I realized.

You thought it would be full of them. I thought I'd be full of gad cells. I thought our inbox should be bursting with the old gadsell. So well done, well done Philip. You've done very well there. I read, not to digress too wildly or to change lanes too quickly, but I've read an amazing thing the other day. Have you heard this story about Terry Pratchett moving publishers?

You know Terry Pratchett? You must be a Terry Pratchett man back in the day. I was, yeah, diggers and truckers and the, the old disco world franchise great stuff love that yeah it's great i loved it as well i actually introduced my um my um the wife i've access to to terry pratchett she really likes him as well yeah really fun so basically right i i read this amazing um thing about terry pratchett and this publisher right that back in the day i can't remember exactly what um year it was i'm just trying look it up now to to confirm apparently it's in the early 90s right

Terry Pratchett was big and doing all this stuff as he had been for years at this point and he was being published I think pretty sure all over the world right and his German publisher but basically his Terry Pratchez's manager got in touch with Terry Pratchett said look we need to make you aware of something

and you know I like it but I just want to let you know it's happening and it turned out his German publisher is a company called Hain, I think it's pronounced, H-E-Y-N-E, had started inserting adverts into the text of his books. Right, so let me unpack this. He had a publisher called Hain, and they started putting adverts for what? So, I'll tell you, Terry Pritchett said, when he was asked about this,

why he moved publishers from Hain to a company called Goldman in the early 90s. He said there were a number of reasons for switching to Goldman, but a deeply personal one for me was the way Hain, in my book, Sorcery, and may have been other books as well, had inserted an advert for soup in the text. He said, there are a few of my lines, I can't remember which, and then it went into something like, around about now our heroes must be pretty hungry,

and what better than a nourishing, bowl of soup. Dude, who's paying for that? Who's with soup? How is soup got enough money to do that? And when they, when he and his editor approached the publishing company about this,

they refused to promise not to do it again. What a relationship. What a relationship. What a publisher. Wow. Isn't that amazing? It's like that fucking Black Mirror episode where she has that brain problem.

And she gets the cheap version of the brain operation so that she... Why, she keeps seeing adverts in her head? No, she keeps in normal conversation. I think she needs a brain operation or something. She has a brain operation. But because they can't afford the licensing plan every month for payment, she goes down to like a level where she keeps advertising stuff in normal conversation. That's brilliant.

She's just in like a classroom and she's just sort of going, well, if you'd like to try that... I haven't seen it. That's a brilliant idea for it. But it sounds very much like that. That's amazing. I just don't think you could nougar shit a deal like that. And you should be at least telling the people who have written the books

and also presumably passing on some of that money to them. It's wild. It's absolutely insane. I mean, I'm surprised that Pratchett is so sang. I mean, obviously, by all accounts, he was a pretty good dude. But I'm surprised he's so sanguine about it. Yeah. And, yeah, and pretty much.

You'd be suing, wouldn't you, if that was you? yeah massively massively that was not part of the deal maybe it was still be suing would you still sue even if it was your favourite soup oh what do you mean he said they're so going well that is kind of something I'd write that does sound like me that does sound like me did I write that maybe I did imagine that you realise you actually did write it fuck it's embarrassing I was on a lot of soup those days I was off my head on soup yeah I remember it's a really cold winter I was getting really

into soup yeah Amazing, isn't it? Pissing in the sink? No. We don't want to encourage that, Peter. I think soup over the, soup over sink is quite a good place to eat your soup as well. Well, I remember there'd been a big debate online ages ago when the internet was a lot more quaint. Soupy, right. About whether it was acceptable to put like leftovers or kind of scraps of your meal down the toilet.

I do that sometimes. Was there ever a decision made there? I can't remember. right but it seems a bit weird but at the same time you put much worse down the toilet don't you so I don't really know why it's a big deal yeah I mean um they sort of say it what was the thing that they were sort of whinging about you couldn't put down the them whinge about bailey's can't put bailey's down the sink because it's got too much fat in it probably barely barely's down the sink

because it's got too much fat in it but I was quite diligently if I'm like cooking bacon in a pan or something I'll leave the pan on the side wait for it to dry and I'll soak it up with a kitchen roll or whatever and then mop it up yeah I don't put it with some bread. Dip it in the bread. I've been to China town. I've seen Rick Edwards' Fatberg program. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.

Well, they pulled out a big fatberg out of the sewer in my, in front of my house in Old Compton Street one time. It was absolutely massive. How big are we talking? Well, I mean, it had to come out of like a pretty seriously large drain, like, you know, sort of flap, I suppose. But they lifted it up and, yeah, I remember sort of taking pictures of it at like 1 o'clock in the morning.

and they were removing this massive fatburg. Did you depress yourself when you caught yourself doing it? I mean, stank it. It absolutely stank the whole place out for ages. How big was it? Just tell them, just give me a comparison. Well, I didn't it? They had to chop it up, I think, with an air pressure,

and then they pulled out chunks of it. So it was all in, like, different chunks. But it sort of, it was roughly the size of Iceland. In the street. Sir to Trump. Sir Trump. How fat, that's got loads of natural resources. Mr. President, this is a strategically important fat bird for your sphere of influence.

I suggest you purchase it immediately. Get in it. Rub it in your face, you tramp. I saw some government official, by the way, going back to that saying, why don't we just give Denmark two trillion dollars for Greenland and they can clear their national debt and do this and do that? And then the Danish guy just reply and say, we haven't got any national debt, you dweeb.

Yeah. Proper back of the fag packet stuff. Yeah, big, big. So I remember this in the, I remember this. to a podcast episode the other day where someone was saying that they've just got no idea what they're doing one step after they do it.

So they've got actually no clue about what's happening in Venezuela now? Apparently Venezuela is already like even worse than it was before. Like they've got no... But it's like at least with Iraq you kind of knew that there was some sort of plan for... I mean it all went to shit, obviously.

It all went to shit. But it took a bit longer. You kind of hope that he'll... This will just... just really blow up in his face. No, but he's forgotten about Venezuela by now, probably. He's probably going to move on to the next thing. Next thing, next time the old Epsteinus comes up, he'll be, you know, sniffing around Cuba and Mexico

and, you know, probably Greenland. But, like, I think we spoke, I think I texted on WhatsApp. Like, Marco Rubio will probably run for president. It's an interesting move for him to be balls deep in Venezuela and then presumably Cuba next, because that was his big pet project. He's not going to be president, though, is he? I know he's not going to be president. but it's an interesting thing to sort of hang your hat on, isn't it?

He'll be the one who's trying to sell that as a good move when it's all because of the general lack of clarity and forward planning. They can't seem to get anything. They're all about the headlines. And then after that, they don't really care what happens, really. I opened a news app earlier and just screenshoted it and sent it to a couple of mates saying, imagine opening a news app five years ago and reading this.

The two headlines at the top of the news app were US attempting to seize Venezuela-linked tanker in European waters. Yeah. And then the next one was, France and allies discussed response to possible U.S. invasion of Greenland. The thing, I mean, there aren't that many sort of levers we can pull,

but everything he does seems to affect us rather directly. We can't fight. We can't fight in fucking Ukraine. We can't tell the Ukrainians to sort of go, you guys keep fighting. You guys keep fighting. just hand over Greenland to fucking the US. Like, I don't know what...

This is what I was thinking about at fucking 5M. Like, what am I going to get my asthma meds? Don't need to buy bottles of water? Ah! Should we... What about if you and I, just you and I, invade Greenland first? Like...

Right. I wanted to go to Greenland because it seems to be a place where just oil... Oil people just get pissed. Just a lot of drinking gone on there. Go to Aberdeen? Proper heavy...

It's like, yeah, it's like Aberdeen of the... Of up there, really, yeah. Would you know? And so you didn't... No directs. No directs. How'd you get there? Um...

I don't know. I don't know. I remember it was a... It wasn't a direct flight anywhere, so... I wasn't going to get back from my... Probably would have invited something to knock, wouldn't it? Wasn't it? Wasn't going to get back from my, uh, for my absolute radio show on a Sunday.

Didn't normally stop it? Didn't normally stop me. Never missed one. I was I think I was more likely to miss one with the national train system than Ryanair and that is saying something that is saying something yeah I think there's only about 30,000 people living in Greenland

Oh give them it then fine No I'm just saying I probably 6,000 are you saying Greenland or Greenland By the way I don't know what do you what do you think Greenland Greenland I think I say both Yeah mix it up

Keep them guessing Keep them guessing. All right. Let's get out of here. Let's come back on Monday when the world's probably going to have ended. This will be an amazing. Monday's episode, which we'll record in the minute, will be an amazing, like, souvenir kind of artifact of what the world was like before it.

So someone will have to do the last podcast. Yeah. Like the last post. Someone will have to do the last podcast. And it'll probably be, I don't know, something about, you're probably like one of those kind of like Manusphere ones, talking to my body cams and stuff.

Probably would be, yeah. Oh, alright. Maybe we'll get that long wave radio out of the studio and use that. We are better than that, Peter. Right, okay. We are better. By what margin?

Well, with the admittedly casuals and a phobia against Italians I did earlier, aside, we're pretty respectful, aren't we? You can't mistreat Italian. You simply can't You simply can't All right then

See on Monday We'll be back on Monday Please later The Luke and Pete show The Luke and Pete show is a stack production And part of the Acast Creator Network