The Luke and Pete Show - Hot Guys Reading Books

Episode Date: May 21, 2026

Last episode’s discussion about performative art consumption continues. Now it’s time to analyse blokes in their 20s walking around with a Penguin classic under their wing. They’ve got ulterior motives, Luke reckons.Also on the table today: clothing and confidence, the brilliance of Danny Kelly and some illuminating listener correspondence about drones.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: [e-mail] Luke and Pete Show is the sometimes ridiculous, always funny podcast with Luke Moore and Pete Donaldson: two men who have time on their hands and a good idea of how to waste it. Subscribe to get your comedy podcast fix every Monday and Thursday. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the Luca Beach. I'm here, Dombs. I'm joined by Mr. Luckey Miller. Hello. Hello, you're all right? Not bad, you? What's going on? You're okay?

What's going on? Yeah, I'm... How am I sort of spending my time? What we spoke about recently? We're talking about my sadness at discovering an old school report. We haven't talked about the fact that you're now 45 years old? I am 45 years old now, yeah.

Not in Great Fettle, to be honest. I wish I was a bit healthier. Yeah, I feel the same, actually. I've been thinking that recently. I just, I just, my lungs have just sort of given up, which I could do without, to be honest. That's been happening.

That's been in the pipeline for years, though, isn't it? That has been in the pipeline for years, but I just don't know why I got to 44, and then my lungs are started going, you know what, Pete, you can just be one of those guys who can't breathe off? Bad, because you need the lungs, definitely. It's not that one of the organs you don't need.

No, could I, could I just have one good lung and just sort of, the appendix? Or the, could they just, could they just, could they rubber band one off, and that could atrophy. Sounds like they already have.

I could just have one, And yeah, well, I just have one good long. They just straightens up and flies right. You should do, yeah, you should do like an X-factor competition between your lungs? Yeah. Who's going to treat Daddy right? And the best one gets to stay. Gets to stay.

And the second one gets stuck on the mountease as bellows for the fireplace. Yeah. There's a shop around the corner that's got this stone lung. I don't know how they made it, but it basically is basically a stone lung. And they've put that in a little frame. And they're selling that for like 90. quid. I was like, who's buying a stone lung? Me.

Because it's more like a functioning lung than my other lung. I like the idea that I can contextually hear you tell me a story about a shop around the corner selling a stone lung. It sounds like what James Joyce. I'm not asked more questions.

Very very James Joyce that is. Yeah. Very figurative, yeah. Listen, last time I'm under, we talked about we talked about performative art. Yes, the old French latex nose boys. Are they French? I thought they're Canadian.

Oh, I thought they're French-Canadian. Probably are. They probably are. Maybe they're French-Ramian. And it's almost equivalent to the old, getting the old book under your wing, walking around London, isn't it? Yeah, nice, yeah.

Yeah, you don't mind a bit. You didn't use to nine a bit of that. I'm a Kindle guy now. You're a Kindle guy man now. Yeah, I see. Do you write on the back with the chalk, what you're reading? Yeah, I write Penguin Classic on shooting chalk on the back of it.

I always think, right? And you know what? And just before you carry on, and then on the Kindle itself, I've just got a load of porno playing cards. There's the Saddam ones that they were later trying to catch Saddam. The, when you sit,

there's a Reddit or a, you know, fucking Twitter or something. An account basically that has hot guys reading books. Basically women. Yeah, I know. I've seen it, yeah. Mainly women, surreptitiously taking pictures of men. I wish I was in there.

Hot guys. Hot guys. Hot guys. to read in books on the chew. And it's like, and it's interesting because a lot, like almost 99% of them are all reading like Penguin classics.

And I'm like, come on. Yeah, I mean, it's funny because I know the account well. I remember the Wi-Fi of access to, I don't know she still does, but she certainly used to follow it. So she, and she would show me because he thought it was funny as well. Yeah. And I, look, I am partly coming up from a position of being jealous because I've not been featured on it and I'd like to be

and it's not going to happen which is fine I can have to make my peace with that but I would also say this every single bloke on it I'm speaking here as a man looks like the worst roommate of all time you know exactly what kind of bloke it is yeah

but they're all they're all reading penguin classics and I'm like I don't feel like you're an avid reader if you're reading something old Oh, well, they just let yourself down there now. But the point of me... But you know what I mean? Like that kind of... If you've...

I just always think with Penguin Classics, if you've not read it, you surely must have read. If you're interested in it, why haven't read it before? And why are you reading it on my tune? You're coming off super, super bitter now. While I'm trying to eat a cream egg.

Well, I'm tongueing, serptitiously tongue, furtively tonguing a cream egg. He may be reading Wuthering Heights, but I'm sitting next to him, playing drum and bass on my speakerphone. Who you going with, girl? I'm playing Monkey Island on my flip-out phone.

I'm eating a tuna sandwich. I'm playing Candy Crush, boy, with the sound on. I'm doing my Japanese duolingo. I'm typing a text on loud. Click, click, click, click, click, click, click. That's another thing as well. People have massive fucking typefaces on their phones these days. Jim Campbell does.

Everybody, Jim Campbell, right? He's got, yeah. But he wears glasses. He's got no excuse. Why do people have such people writing? Yeah, take it up with him. That's interesting, isn't he? But on those dudes reading the books,

every single one of them is exactly the guy who, when you were saying in your mid-20s, there'd be guys who girls would all really like, and every other bloke would be like, this guy. Get a load of this guy. This guy in his mid-20s is actually trying to have like performative, meaningful conversations with girls while we're all standing around getting,

pissed. What is his problem? But all the girls would love it. They'd love it. Yeah, because he's, because he's normal. Yeah, because he's actually taking interest. He's actually taking interest, yeah. Yeah, yeah. But he's doing it for his own selfish reasons, of course. That's what you're saying. No, yeah, it's just, they look

like, they are, it's like every one of them looks fuck boycorded. Yeah, that's not what I'm trying to say. You're saying a much, quick, much more easy way, yeah. Every one of them reminds me of that lad I don't like on Instagram about the, the fucking stuff. who did do the marathon a few weeks ago.

He did do the marathon loom. Did he complete it? I can only presume. He's in his 20s. God, he fucking... I saw Hardest Giza got a lot of stick. Have you seen that? Which was Hardest Giza now?

The guy who ran the length of Africa, ginger beard. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did he get skis? He wasn't there. He was taking chunks out of... I think he was doing a promotional run for something. And they were sort of saying, he kind of, he sort of sped up like 30 miles an hour at this juncture.

On one of the one. He was getting a lot of stick because he... got a load of endorsements because he is the guy he is. I mean, he did, as far as I know, there was nothing erroneous going on. Unto-about the African one. He basically did it. But he got endorsement and he got this,

he's basically like a sponsored athlete now, and he was doing a London marathon, and I think he was giving it the big one about how he was going to do it in a certain time. Yeah. And he did it about half an hour behind the time. He said he was going to do it, and people were giving him shit.

Fine. Basically, he still did it on the marathon for like two hours. 45, which is amazing. But he then apparently, allegedly, made up all these reasons why he was slow or slow her than he said he was going to be, including the fact that he said he had like a stomach cramp at 10K and he had to go, it took him 10 minutes to have a shit or something. And then just grab this splits off the London Marathon website and was like, that's not what happened because that would come up on the thing and it didn't.

You were just slower. So he's getting low. Basically, he did so really impressive. but he said he would do something even more impressive, then did have, then made an excuse. But his thing wasn't like being the fastest marathon guy, it was just being an ultra-marathon guy. Yeah, but I think he keeps giving it the big licks

about how he wants to become a team GB ultramarathon runner. Right. That's his like next task. Let alone it, it's a different level on it. It's like you can't, you, that's a genetic thing. If you've run the length of Africa, just have a fucking day off. Yeah, have a day off. No, apparently, hardly the most done that before.

Lenovo endorsement or whatever. have you got a lot of stick because he claimed to be the first and the only person to run length africa and loads people said no people other people have done it kind of thing i don't know if they have or not but that's what yeah i think he seems right he just gets a lot of stick online i don't know if it's just hated yeah it's just you i guess if you're not running a marathon um i guess you're kind of got a lot of free time isn't it that's why you get in trouble because you just get you spend too much on too much time online is anyone talking about hardest geese

I just feel like the internet is a weird place when you've literally run the length of Africa and done a sub three-hour marathon and people still hate you you think that would be above you think that you'd be above it

at all he probably is I just noticed it did it? Yeah the speaking of high achieving athletes I spent a lot of last night

watching Dong Fangio goal competition relations. Yeah, you shared a bit of that, I'm not sure why. Do you remember that Chinese guy you played for Man United? And everyone said that he was basically, you know, like they usually fucking level at Asian footballers.

Oh, he's just there to feather a Asian market sort of nest. Yeah, but in this case, I didn't be hard of the career, did he? Yeah, well, honestly, I think Sir Alex Ferguson said that, reading around it, Sir Alex Ferguson said that he's really powerful, he's really strong. And he thinks it can cut it in the Premier League. And there are thousands of footballers who, you know, Alex Ferguson's fancied, didn't manage to make the grade and they've moved on for whatever reason. Yeah.

I think Don Fang-Ju is like, I think he could have done something. Yeah, but you're not, respectfully, you're not a sponsor of top-level football talent, Pete. I think I am, though. I think I am. Okay, who else is on your radar? A little known fella, long face, thick as mince, Harald Keane. Harold Cain You're predicting

Great things for him are you? Yeah His name's not actually Harold It's Harry, it's just Harry I think Is it Harry? That's not right I don't think you should be allowed Silly Nick

Harry is a shortening of Harold And so you shouldn't be allowed To be called It's like our colleague Charlie, he's not Charles, is he? Well, and he was at an awards Do yesterday He wasn't wearing a shirt

He's wearing a jacket and no shirt I thought that was on, Listen, we both know that Charles slash Charlie is not here to defend themselves In fact, he's in Australia. He's in Australia with the award-winning aforementioned P-1 podcast.

So he ain't got time for us. But I thought that outfit was astonishing. I have to say it was extraordinary. That's a good place. That's a good place for you to wear no shirt. Exactly. Because you're in Australia's hot. I thought that was an extraordinary choice of outfit.

I have to say that. I've told him. No, I, look, and I've told... So for those other have seen it, it was like a suit with nothing underneath it. Yeah. But I also think... I also think it's... I also think he looks excellent.

But isn't it interesting that... Isn't it interesting that fashion... You know, you can see David Beckham wear that. You can see producer Charlie wear that. But if I tried... If I tried that... Any year in my life, I would be quite rightly criticised.

I think it's too ambitious. And that's you, sir. Yeah, it's too ambitious for me. It's not too ambitious for producer Charlie. you know, head of studio Charlie, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not, it's not too ambitious for him. But I do think there's a lot of fashion that's locked away behind a wall, a glass ceiling, if you will, a glass wall, if you can't,

a fragile glass wall. And you think, oh, I don't feel brave enough to choose that item. I don't, no, but I don't feel together enough. I feel brave enough to walk around with the jacket without a top on, but I think it's half of it is selling it, in it? It's having that confidence. You can't let it wear you, can you? Exactly.

Exactly, exactly. Yeah, it becomes too much of a conversation and you don't, and you know, you can't just be walking around with a prepared statement about what you're wearing. You've just got to, you know, white-knuckle it and just go off. It's quite an oblique way of bringing into the chat that we won another SJA, isn't it? Yeah. What is, um,

SGA? Sports journalism awards. What was the, what was there, sort of game I get, SGA? Can't remember. Anyway, an SGA, lovely stuff. Bracking. Two in a row now,

podcast of the year. There we go. They'll have to retire. No problem. No big deal. What you're worried about? Next. Wrestling.

Wrestling me has won the UKFF, the UK Fan Forum, you know, the world's biggest wrestling forum, award five years in a row. Bloody hell. Don't hide that like under a bushel.

Hide that under a bushel. Share it. And they tried, they tried to change the, um, the constraints of the, um, things that we didn't win it again.

Oh, they're fucking wankers. We won it again. And also the W, the W. W. They did, something called the vault and they just

started putting out old kind of like lost to time little videos on YouTube and everyone was loving it because like oh fucking hell it's a legion of Doom's dark match that nobody that was never broadcast it's like you know only the stuff that only W.E. can do because they're the only people who have warehouses

full of old footage they went to tour with us and we beat them last year as well. That is lovely stuff. Hey EW we beat them this year. You were just absolutely doing it. doing bits. Taring it up.

But seriously, the SJA is the big one. Yeah, okay, fine. I mean, it's remarkable that you look at the people

who are up against. Little plucky little stack. It's the BBC. It's the athletic. It's the athletic. Are the athletes still doing stuff? All the podcasts that I listen to from the athletic.

Yeah, but it's not just podcasts. It's like, it's just journalism generally. Right. They do still have some podcasts. Yeah. They've got the Spurs one,

which the great Danny Kelly is currently taking time off for because he's been on well. Oh yeah, that's right. Out of all the people we spoke, it's weird, isn't it? Like, we were speaking about Danny Kelly on the Football Rumble, and Marcus told that story about him doing, you know, just the most hilarious bit of radio where he said he called...

Rafferbinoleana? He called Raffirprennan. Out of nowhere. Yeah. And it was just because he just completely had a different idea about what nonce meant. Yeah. And the way that it was kind of, and I make no... I'll do it again.

I have to say, for the record, and it gives me no pleasure to say that Raffa Panetes is a nonce. An amazing thing to say, obviously nonce. It cut to ads as well. He pointed to the ad guy. He pointed to the producer to kill it on that point as well. And so everybody in the room and everybody in the world knew what nonce. Danny Hilley didn't inexplicably. A very well, a well-cultured, thoughtful man.

It's just one of those kind of blind spots that you kind of, you know, you sometimes encounter, but to use it so ruthlessly, to use it so kind of you know, sort of like, like, give it a real fucking like, brr-r-r-d-you-but that's what he's broadcast in star. Brilliant. Yeah, he's very definitive.

But the day, we never talk about Danny Callum, the day that we talked about him, it was announced that he had, he was dealing with a bit of cancer. So it's weird. Every time the ramble sort of says something about somebody, they always... Is it like an Rambi-Cur? It's the Aaron Ramsey curse.

I've always got Danny front of mind. He's been such a legend. I was actually on a Zoom call with Danny when my wife went into Labor. Yeah, okay. And it was like, it was such a kind of, Danny, I've got to go. And he was like, what's happened?

I told him. And he was like, oh, brilliant. And it's like, he's the kind of guy where these things just happened to him. Like, he told me an amazing story. You're not an nonce. No, he's a brilliant broadcaster, Danny. And he's a brilliant storyteller.

And he's one of the best broadcast I've ever worked with. I've said that millions of times. If anyone's ever listened, I've said it loads of times. I rate him so much. He's brilliant. And he told me an amazing story once. So did you know that he was a very early investor in Football 365? That's right.

Yes. Okay. And he, big supporters of the Rumble back in the day. Yeah, they were. And he, that was sold to Sky, right? I think it was sold to News Corp. One of Murdox operations anyway. And the story Danny told me was that when they were going to

go and do the presentation because they thought that Murdoch's operation, whichever one it was, wanted to buy them. It was like the money men were going to go out the meeting. And then last minute, one of them called up Danny, who was the editorial kind of guy, and said, oh, we've got to change your heart. I think we really need you to come to the meeting to sell it into all the suits, right? We need someone from the editorial side to just really sell the vision. And Danny was like, well, I haven't done anything to prepare. And this is the very start of the internet, the dot-com bubble, right? It's very start of when the internet was taken off. So people weren't really that well versed in the internet.

And they weren't quite sold on it, right? It was very early on. And he said, well, I haven't done anything to prepare. I don't know what I'm going to say or whatever. And then, oh yeah, but you're Danny Kelly. You'll just work it out, right? Danny Kelly claims, I don't know this is true, but he claims, he walks into this boardroom when he's introduced,

and he's got a ream of paper in one hand, as in like plain paper, and an old-fashioned bottle of ink in the other hand. Right, yeah. And he walks in, he screws up like two or three, pieces of paper, shoves them in his mouth, stands there staring at them, chewing it, swallows it, downs the whole bottle of ink and just says print is dead and walks out again. I don't think you need that in your life, to be honest. I don't think, I can't remember he said turned this shit's black or not, but he said it wasn't

ideal, but he said it was the only idea he had. So maybe there's more stuff kicking around, like these little stories. Oh, it's quality. He's a great story to him. I remember working with once on TalkSport when a guest pulled out in like the ad break and each talk sport hour

was separated into I think like 13 minute sections right so you had like a 13 minute section between like ad break and ad break or news or whatever and this guy who came on it was when Free Solo won the Oscar for

Remember that free solo rock climbing thing? Yeah yeah the climbing one yeah And there was a guy who was on the line from America was going to talk to us about it and he dropped off and he just couldn't get hold of him and Danny was like I don't worry about it I'll just do it and Dan,

he did like 13 minutes impromptu just about rock climbing and I was just sitting there like nodding along saying nothing I'd even seen the film at that point honestly he's a different class a different class of broadcaster so good

incredible I rate him so highly I wish him well I've reached out to him since he's been unwell and hopefully he'll be okay and he'll bounce back should we do should we do a couple of emails

let's do it do this one from Ben let's do this one from Ben yeah okay he says hi guys listen to a recent episode where Luke commented on the disparity between presence of drones in prison versus our regular civilian lives.

Do you remember that, Pete? Yes, yes, yes, nice. I said that like drones are dropping drugs into prisons and I basically heard that on the Roy Stewart podcast. He was talking about that because he was prisons minister, wasn't he? Yeah. And I said, well, we don't really see drones knocking about here, even though they're on the front line in Ukraine, in Iran and all the rest of it.

but Ben says in an increasingly more frequent occurrence since Brexit Ireland must seem to be quite ahead of the United Kingdom with this regard because McDonald's and Blanchard's town a large suburban area on the outside outskirts of Dublin does drone delivery regularly. What?

And they deliver your food within five minutes. They're expanding rapidly across the country and becoming common occurrence both orally and visually as you walk around the areas they deliver. The company is called Manna M-A-N-N-A. Yeah. They've just raised $50 million with a Series B funding apparently.

And they look and it looks like they sort of drop the thing on the floor. Is that true? But then, but then it's like tethered by like a, a wire. Do you sort of undo that wire?

And then it sort of goes on its merry way? Because I'm, you know, my, you know what my timing management is like, I'll be like in the shower or something and it'll just be running out of battery. I'm into this.

Is it real though? I guess so. I mean, yeah, it looks like it's, it looks like it's, um, an acceptable form of, I,

I, I, presumably, um, listener Ben is, uh, is someone who's across it, but it looks like,

there must be regulations in London, no, no. Yeah, I imagine this probably not. Yeah, it's probably more rural sort of area. It's probably more helpful.

But yeah, that'd be really, really helpful. It was, there's a man, um, who's delivering me some KFC and he was very upset

because I, uh, didn't come to the door quick enough. I was like, I do, you know, I did me best. I'm always waiting for,

I'm always very, super conscious that they're going to be up against it. I told you, I sometimes see a bunch of lads on mopeds hanging around outside the sales reason where I live and I think on a Friday night it looks like a great crack yeah well you used to see that with

people who used to deliver like packages and letters and stuff around Soho they'd all be like they'd all be cycle boys and they'd all be like just sort of sitting around like you know having a chat having a can or something on a Friday afternoon it looked like a proper good laugh yeah but Ben says

they're also like French or something to Pete's point they are quite loud and intrusive and there have been large numbers of complaints about both the noise and privacy concerns. The Irish Times has run a story on it. Love the show. I hope this is slightly more interesting than my previous email on

EU battery legislation. Kind regards to Ben. I can't remember that, Ben, but I'm sure it wasn't too bad. I am honestly astonished that that is happening. I had no idea. I also perhaps quite cynically thought that all this talk about robot delivery of stuff was just like a PR opportunity

for Amazon or something like that. They were never actually going to do it. Yeah. Well, Ben just talking about EU battery legislation. I got my dad on an EU nice to have he, you know, stanched why can't you just have a normal relationship with your dad?

And he said, and he said, uh, and we were talking about um, you're like the same as me. And you know it. Um, and so is everybody else. Um, he, he was going, why can't, oh, I was looking for an iPad charger. He was like, why can't they all just be the same charger? I said, well, that's good.

Finally. The EU has made it so that everybody in Europe has to have the same USBC charging. The old iPhones, they have to be USBC powered. Ha ha! Have a bit of that, Daniel. And then he went on about some side issue that he set about about the EU. Stop the boats. They also make sure you can't charge too much for mobile phone roaming as well, don't they?

Yes, nice, yeah. Because we all thought that was going to be... But I guess if we're not part of the EU, so we... No, but I think the companies have just kept up with it off their own position. Yeah, I think they've done that. But I think that's an interesting. I would love to be the bloke in McDonald's who flies the drone to your house. Yeah, but you're just, you just type in a address, though, don't you?

It's not like you fly in. It's not like a... It's not like a... It's got to be. Get out of town. Really? Maybe not, actually. Maybe somebody does have to draw on.

So we're living in a world now where potentially, I order a McDonald's, say I live, I live in, in that suburb of Dublin. I order a McDonald's, a bloke, the food is prepared, put in a bag, the bloke types in my address,

and a robot drone plane flies it to my house and drops it in my front garden. Yeah, you're probably right, it probably is flown by somebody. That would probably be the rule, wouldn't it? Because around Las Vegas

you've got the driverless taxis, and they do go a fair whack. They do go really quickly. I've seen a couple of those in London recently. Yeah, they absolutely fly around. These ones are with drivers, though, I guess for safety reason. They're just doing tests or something. But I can't see, I cannot see how you're going to get driverless taxis in London.

The roads are so tricky. And Jaywalk, we haven't had it drilled into us that Jaywalking is a crime over here. You know, like in America, like people sort of go, oh, you shouldn't do that. But the roads are massive as well. The big difference to American and British driving that would be relevant to this topic is that, so near where I live, it's all single file because people park on both sides. How is the driver's taxi going to know that when it goes up to halfway up a road, it's got to pull in to let someone else through? Well, I mean, presumably that's all coded in, isn't it?

And if you go up against each other, one of you has to reverse, how does the driver's taxi know they're going to have to reverse? Maybe it's got like a cuck function. They're just constantly cucking. They're constantly making the decision to be the weaker. Yeah, but that's what I mean? How do you give a driverless car the eyes? You know what I mean?

Because you give drivers the eyes I hear it when people sort of go want you to do something so they start wafting their hand around and you go over it all right fuck you fucking move dick you know the boss of me you know the boss of me I'll mess up my driving myself thank you very much

what about this email as well is this final email for now then from our friend Sandy hello to you Sandy hi there Luke in the P I was at the London Marathon Expo a few weeks ago supporting my wife as we picked up a bib number and it might be worth checking the whereabouts of your friend and mine,

Mr Diggery Donaldson, as it seems he's been spotted in the wild by yours truly. Maybe I would have seen him running. I don't think so. Anyway, long story short, it's another Pete Donaldson look-alike. It's not an audio feature, but I would like you to assess it, Peter,

by looking at it. I think it's pretty good. I'll give that a seven out of ten. It's not a bad one. It's kind of, he's got a mullet, which he's gone for all of the problems at the same time, hasn't it? It's a real smogger board of...

He's dressed very more, much more straight-laced, than you. He's where he's got I think a DGI Osmore, speaking of drawn technology he's got a little he's got a little camera in his hand I think so he might be furtively

taking pictures of girls' bombs so that again fits he he's basically got glasses like me, he's got a moustache which I have had in the past he's got a bit of a dirty Dominic Mysterio mullet and

yeah look it's a strong seven out of ten I can't deny it. It's a good one. I agree. What I would say, though, is, Sandy, that we don't endorse you taking pictures of random people in the public and sharing it broadly as poor form.

If they've chosen to put themselves out there in the public arena, like that vote who does the YouTube cooking, fine, fair game. Luke, Luke, look, we wouldn't have any diggerie doppelgangers. I just like people to get permission. What? Oh, can I, there's a, um, oh, there's a man on a podcast I know. that looks a bit like you. No, it looks like everyone has ever lived.

Yeah. But he probably gets that as well because he probably looks like everyone who's ever lived. And it's never complimentary. It's not complimentary here. Like when we did the round of the live show. And we didn't look alike with you. One of them was just a guy who was found in bed with a corpse.

It was a mug shop. In bed with a corpse. He didn't really look like you as well. I sometimes have a dream that I've killed someone and I've buried it. It's probably my love of cement at this day and around about now. Yeah, I have sort of dreams where I've killed someone and they're underneath my kitchen

and I'm thinking about moving out and knowing full well as a body under there. Again, it goes back to the thing we're talking about a little while. That is mad, isn't it? That's proper mad. And I wake up and I go, oh, I'm so glad I'm not killed anyone. It's like watching this,

when you watch those documentaries about where someone's just, you know, killed someone or killed someone or killed their family or something, and they get, and the police are basically in their house and they're going, oh, you're doing? he's gone, yeah, all right, and he's gone, oh, he's in so much trouble.

I'm so glad I haven't killed him on. Did you ever see that, um, doc about, not be the Louis Theroux one, where the guy he was so paranoid about committing crimes, he used to handcuff himself to his own bed at night. Because he was worried about sleepwalking himself into a crime. I see. Well, that's easily done.

I mean, it's no more difficult to do with an asleep apnea, more might suggest. I just think, yeah, I just, I don't really see it. You've got to play the numbers game in these kind of things. I just don't think it's that likely. yeah yeah I had a dream last night that I um someone was trying to break into the house and I woke up and I said to my wife oh did you hear that and she was like what and I was like nothing and she went to sleep yeah wild I was um we but me and Sarah both reckon that the other person snores which we clearly do I don't think I snores Sarah doesn't think she snores and I um and she she definitely does and I clearly do and we were having like a little um like for my birthday we having like a head massage or I don't think I snores and I um a chapley's head massage

that Sarah booked and I fell asleep a couple of times and that was absolutely lovely Is that a faux pie in the situation or? I don't know is it disrespectful to fall asleep during the massage? It's a rigging endorsement probably of anything. Yeah, exactly you're so relaxed.

Yeah, I don't know. They did say that like 99% of blocks who go in for a head massage do fall asleep so they had this little sort Is it like an elaborate roost to rifle through your wallet or something? Probably.

They had like a tool Because I had my eyes closed They had this tool that felt like a sort of Like two toothbrushes kind of like together In your hair, in your head And I really wanted to order my eyes to see what this tool was But I didn't get to see it in the end You've got a desperate need to know about tech

But at the same time you're also unfailingly polite Yeah I just I just, what if I didn't like the look of it? What if they didn't like the look of me looking at it? I don't know better off stand asleep. You're right. You're probably know,

but you probably got your face on the wall behind the counter now. Nothing bad. All right. You woke up with morning glory and then ask to see. Ask to know what the tool was they used that made it happen.

Right, we'll be back next time. Look at ourselves. Did you hear about that geezer he posted on Twitter on one of those confessions tweets that he went to a he went to a prostate examination? right because he was worried about in large prostate and this this guy doctor I guess or nurse

shoved two like lubricated fingers up his bum yeah at which point he instantly ejaculated and then passed out the passing out is yeah probably knocked a load stuff off the counter and everything oh my god well they should warn you I was I suppose I think it's one of those I think prostit milking I believe they call it yeah which is a foul term to use yeah it's it is it is a involuntary apparently. I bet. Why have we never tried tried to have a goal?

Tune in next week. Tune in next week. Snackable content. Usable news. We'll be on the Luke of Pete show finger each other or just ourselves. Yeah, here a quest on the go.

Here a quest on the go. All right, see you later. Bye-bye. The Luke and Pete show is a stack production and part of the ACAST creator network.