The Luke and Pete Show - #Lads behaviour

Episode Date: May 26, 2022

Luke’s got an idea for a new TV show. And if we're being brutally honest... it’s not actually that bad.We then hear about some #lads behaviour as Luke’s former football team has recently been on tour and we continue on our quest to find new players for our big battery database.Want to contact the show? Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

oh welcome you gotta harmonize luke welcome that's perfect i had a perfect pitch i think i did like a test online there was like a youtube video and it worked out whether you had perfect pitch or not yeah and uh turns out turns out i i'm um they said i've got a brain injury you know listen you know how obnoxious i can be when it comes to how good i think i am at singing so yeah, but the difference is, though, you are actually quite good at singing. It's very upsetting that you've got a skill that I don't have. Well, hang on, there's more than one. Hey, hang on. Hang on, mate.

You should have seen this after the lunch I just ate. The lesser-known off-menu item, the three-foot sub. Welcome to the Luke and Pete show, very much. The three-foot sub of podcasts. I'm Luke Moore, and that's Pete Donaldson. Have you ever seen those lads trying to take a sewer pipe, well, it's not a sewer pipe, it's just a toilet pipe, a waste pipe, out of a wall in the...

It looks like one of those old council miners' houses where you've got a back alley and stuff where everybody puts their bins. it looks like a kind of like one of those old council miners' houses with, you know, you've got like a back alley and stuff where everybody puts their bins. It looked like one of those kind of houses, just a yard. And they were taking this waste pipe out and it was fine coming out,

but as soon as they started to tilt it a little bit, a succession of just the most horrific, and you just know exactly what it smelledelt like and the lads are on roofs and they're just vomiting and nobody can handle it one bloke's just laughing his head off and he can't believe it it's such a good clip and I just sort of go, how are they going to get rid of all that shitty toilet paper that's now in someone's yard

horrible, horrible stuff if you want to know what it's like being friends with Pete all you need to do is kind of rewind 30 seconds and just listen to the way he asked that question, like it was, have you seen the latest episode of Better Call Saul? It was, have you seen those lads

putting a sewer pipe full of shit out of a wall? Yeah, but I think Netflix, it's cheaper than Better Call Saul. I'm just saying, indemnit insurance of a builder is much less than an actual production. I told you, I'm sure I told you on of a builder is much less than an actual production I told you I'm sure I told you

on this show I mean obviously the greatest ever sewage story is the Jim Campbell crappening story which the guys listening to this show

now will have heard and you can go back and listen the last time Jim was on but I had this idea for a TV kind of show and I had the idea years ago

like I promise you I had you know remember famously and listen Ben Bailey Smith will back me up on this famously you know I had the idea years ago. I promise you. You remember famously, and listen, Ben Bailey-Smith will back me up on this. Famously, you know I had the idea for Gogglebox before Gogglebox.

Right, okay. But I had it about football. I had it about get ex-players to watch current football matches. It's exactly the same format in my mind. It looked exactly the same. Isn't it not basically what Jules does on a Saturday afternoon? Yeah, but it's

far more casual than that. I actually put the idea to Ray Parler. He was quite up for it. Partly because he loves a beer and he loves a pound note. And so I don't think he listened to anything other than that. And after that, the pitch didn't really make any difference.

And what I would have is I would have like, you know, footballers, old footballers watching any kind of football game. I mean, you could kind of refine it however you want, but it's exactly like Gogglebox, but you flick between footballers watching the game, right? But in a much more casual way, not in a kind of, there's been a goal, but where's it, who to, Chris? Not like that, but like a football thing.

Anyway, so I had that idea. So my track record's already very good, right? I pitched it to Ben Bay Smith. He thought it was a brilliant idea and it went nowhere for whatever reason. Probably I got caught up doing something else. But anyway, I had this idea, which I think would be a brilliant TV show,

which is essentially when you get like, say, people go out on the town on a Saturday night. Say people go out on the town on a Saturday night. Yeah. They have live body cams on the whole night. You can tune in live streaming it whenever you want. It's like the Prodigy video. Like, I've smacked my bitch up video.

Yeah. I understand it will probably be a million times more boring than that because most nights out are really boring but I would 100% pay a subscription to live stream body cam footage of all the pubs in any provincial town where I grew up kicking out but it depends on

oh what the body cam's a policeman? or bouncers? and I could be my own vision mixer take me back to Big Gav now. Take me back to Big Gav. Don't make me do the ATM switcher. Don't make me do that. Don't make me make that one.

We've only got four cameras and that keeps breaking down. Coming up on Cinderella's Guildford. Coming up next, problems at Mill. No, I'd love to be able to flip between Big Gav kicking off at the Cabal shop and flick back to Ash the Bash struggling to get his trousers up again after taking a piss that he's just been arrested for. I want to watch it.

What's inspired me is that legendary Twitter feed, Decent Patter where it's basically the best of Scottish life in one Twitter feed. One minute it's like an old woman kicking off in the pub and beating up a younger bloke.

And the next minute it's a bloke, a kid with his mates who's climbed a tree, fallen out the tree, but his pants have been caught on a branch and his cock and balls are out and all his mates are laughing at him. Or, and then the next minute it's a bloke who hasn't got the right footwear on

to be going, walking up an icy hill with his kids and keeps sliding all the way down the bottom of it over and over again like that just that everyday life kind of stuff is what i'm all about well i just think that um imagine like explaining um the smartphone to jeremy beadle he'd be like because he he relies on people filming with old dv cameras or vhs cameras or even Super 8 cameras what's going on? People just fixing stuff nowadays people film stuff all the time and you've got CCTV on top of that he missed the golden age

of you being framed It's actually a very very tough thing to take when you think about that Beatles not around to witness what is essentially a Pandora's box slash land of milk and honey to hear. He'd be the one who could really unlock the potential of it because he'd have so much raw material to work with.

Do you reckon they, we may have spoken about this before, but do you reckon they just sort of license, you know, they sort of, they dangle the 250 quid shaped carrot of people who would want to be sending their clips in. I tend to think that they probably buy these clips wholesale from like a uh an online folly over vendor someone who just vends um unfortunate clips and stuff they must yeah it's really interesting to think about because there's no way i don't care what harry hill says who i love and who who does the narration for you've

been framed there's no way people are sending that show and they're basically rehashing really old video camera clips right or they're doing what you say there but i can't believe people send stuff in now it's the same way i can't believe anyone calls into a radio station requesting to hear a song no it's that old why have you not got a copy um yes they do and and it's weird because like as the let me sketch goes if you if that's your favorite song why have you not got a copy of it why have you not got a copy of it? Why have you not got a copy of that song for crying out loud? It's bizarre. Or access to a stream of it.

I understand I diverge from you and most of the general public on this, but when the Babylon Zoo Spaceman song came out on the Levi's advert, I thought it was the best thing ever. And that advert is the fucking best advert. It's so good. Even now. I watch it probably once a month on YouTube. It's very colorful it's very 90s isn't it it's like back then everything was just so all the saturation was turned up to a million you can watch it you can

watch it even if it's like a space about space or whatever uh and it's it's quite whimsical and sci-fi and it's parodying something that was from the 50s you can still tell it's 90s because of the colors they use sorry yeah i wasn't really listening i was just making sure i used the right word at epochal but i did um uh yeah no you're right it's very colorful very saturated but it's still amazing it stands up brilliantly well i remember calling into power fm 103.2 power fm as a whatever i would have been then a 14 year old asking to hear that song and the guy on the phone was like yeah we haven't got it like what do you mean you haven't no because it wasn't released at that point

no but i mean saying oh would it why wouldn't they have it though if you've heard it because i've only heard that you've got an advert yeah so i called him saying um they're still on the levi's advert spaceman song can you play it and he's like we ain't got it i don't know what it is because it hadn't been like publicly released at that point but that's 1995 or whatever

so it's a long time ago these days you're not calling up saying can you oh I really want to hear my favourite pulp song babies which that's you by the way

I really want to hear my favourite pulp song can you play it that's not even that's not even the third most convenient way to hear it I was in a I was in a I was in an Irish pub at Pulp South. That's not even the third most convenient way to hear it.

I was in an Irish pub watching some blokes do karaoke in Milan and I was like, I don't think I've got a karaoke song in me. Hang on. I think if I did have, if I did have,

I think I would probably go for This Is Hardcore by Pulp. If that song was more famous, I think that's my karaoke song. There's people listening to this show who will never in their life, with respect to them, get the chance to go to Milan, right?

Yeah. People listening right now in Australia, for example, who may never get to visit Europe, don't have the means, don't have the time, would love to but would never get there, and you are spending your time at an Irish karaoke bar in Milanan correct correct what's the rationale um did you have a body cam

it was because it was i wanted to see some body cam action it was busy it was there was a family that looked um like they there was a very interesting family there they were celebrating a birthday but there was like it was a proper big italian family yeah and i just wanted to look at them um and so yeah basically that really ruined that birthday by doing a lot of karaoke well i really ruined it by singing this is hardcore by pulp really eyeballing the old uh lady of the of the troop uh eating a bit of birthday cake looking in her eyes and singing and that goes in there and that goes in there and that goes in there, and that goes in there, and that goes in there. And then it's over. And then when they were finally relieved it was over,

they just saw you on the big screen scrolling through and stopping on Sorted for ease and whiz and just going back up onto the stage. Oh, is this the way they say? I think the Pulp are one of the worst British bands ever. Yeah, okay. I do. I do think that. What an interesting lie

to say on the look of Pete Shaw. What a thing to say for the clout. What a nonsense. Lying to impress people again. Yeah, exactly. Correct. That's what my autobiography's going to be called. But you know earlier you mentioned

that house, those houses where you're talking about the sewage mishap the houses with the um the back alley between the two rows of houses and the um and the bins that's what i basically grew up in a house exactly like that right okay yeah yeah that was that was kind of a big part of my um my childhood and all the kids would play in that alleyway bit yeah there's not no sewage uh from from what i remember um slap it's the sound it makes when wet toilet roll and shit slaps on the floor annoying what that's going to smell like it i mean just glastonbury isn't it really it's just glastonbury glastonbury was like i i my my big

beef with glastonbury was, I don't know now, I literally haven't been since 2005, but my big beef with Glastonbury around that time was that you could be making this better for people, but you're just not. Are you talking to me? No, no, no. Well, you were probably presenting on one of the stages,

were you, in 2005? Fucking doing some kind of alternative indie band stage or something. Yeah, yeah. Welcome. Coming up next, fucking add N to X on one of the stages in 2005 fucking do it as a kind of alternative indie band stage or something yeah welcome coming up next fucking add N to X or whatever it would have been

we only ever did we only ever did Glastonbury once I only ever worked Glastonbury once and it was it was pretty bloody horrific to be honest

just it was one of the muddy years no no just no just just doing doing backstage stuff when I was at Absolute

I was just doing a yeah just doing the odd interviews here and there Glass Vegas do you remember that? Yes I do yes I remember that yeah my point was that like I'm talking I'm referring to the organisers of Glastonbury

I just remember thinking you know people have paid a lot of money I mean it's fucking expensive i mean it's really expensive now but it was still quite expensive back then and there was a lot of the thing a lot of it was like there's no actual reason why this can't be better why it can't be more hygienic why it can't be more sort of you know um user friendly if you like i remember michael evas got a load of stick for it a few years ago and he came up with

some ridiculous excuse. Oh, you know, the Glastonbury site is so big there just simply aren't enough portaloos in Britain. Absolute bullshit. You just don't want to fucking pay. You don't want to pay.

You don't want your overheads to be reduced. The whole kind of, oh, you do? Yeah, I just like the, increased rather, the,

yeah, it's just the goddamn, the car park. There's just mud everywhere and it's just the goddamn, the car park. There's just mud everywhere and it's just a nightmare to get off. You know, it's just a nightmare to bloody get off. Just deal, just, just, certainly for the car park bit, you need to make proper car parks because it's just a nightmare to get off. Hit it.

I never, I don't think I ever drove. I can remember when I went in 1998, it still felt, I mean, obviously I was only 17, so it was probably more to do with me than anything else, but it still felt quite dangerous. Yeah. It's about before, you know, scouts are coming down in groups,

just robbing tents. But I'm just trying to see why I was leaving anything valuable in my tent. Yeah. Like, what was I, what possible thing did I have? I was 17, I didn't have anything valuable. Exactly, because i thought they'd go like what like a like a cassette recorder or like a cd recorder where's that

come from well when you look at like when you're a portrait of the queen what are you talking about talk boys but like when like back in the day you sort of like you look back to what you owned when you were a kid you're like that is all fucking worthless completely worthless but obviously back then it was important to you that you remained the owner of that talk boy. Yeah. I think I've never had a talk boy. I mean, that would have been fucking great.

No. But I don't remember having anything of value. 1998, it was so muddy, I went home early. I lost all my stuff anyway. So all my clothes had been swept away. The tent had gone. It was a away the tent right on it was a fucking disaster and ultimately it was biblically bad weather but i don't think necessarily the evis family god bless them could have done anything about that but it was like when i say it was

dangerous i i definitely get this the the kind of the drug dealing element which was clearly people just gone there but basically people that you know and if you're a fan of the old free market capitalism, then, you know, fair enough. You'd understand why. People have gone, right,

well, there's going to be 150,000 fucking captive audience customers in this field for the weekend. I'm definitely going down there. And so they sold, drugs being sold everywhere. I also just remember there being almost an entire part of the camp dedicated to proper travelling folk, you know, travelling families. Right. Who would live their lives as travellers generally, and then for the Glastonbury Festival they would be there.

And I'm pretty sure Evas had like a deal just to let them in. It was like part of it, because it's like, you know, there's quite a mystical kind of element to it and stuff. mystical kind of element to it and stuff. Well, any of the healing... Because you sort of think, if you're him and some mystical guys want to come in, I'm not saying travellers, but I'm saying like...

Mystical guys! The mystical guys who hang out around the healing circle and stuff with their fire poi or whatever. They're never going to walk down the hill to go and watch Moby, are they? Or maybe... Actually, that's a bad example because maybe they would go and watch Moby are they so or maybe actually that's a bad example

because maybe they would go and see Moby you confused me it was such a bad example going down to watch Rocket from the Crypt yeah yeah

they're not going to be on the second stage of the John Peel tent they're not going to be in there watching Feeder or Garbage or Rocket from the Crypt

right they or John Spencer Blues Explosion, who seem to be on every fucking year. They're going to be just keeping to themselves in the healing field, improving the, you know, the complimentary kind of stuff

that you sort of see at Glastonbury. So fundamentally, I think it's fine to let them in because they're never going to be, they're never going to contribute. Well, it's kind of fun to do what you want if it's your festival, I guess. Yeah.

But I also remember getting there and being quite pissed off that in 1998 or whatever I'd paid like 80 quid to go because as soon as I got there, no one was paying to get in. Like, no one. Okay. It was like you'd give a fiver to a geezer

who would just put a ladder up against the fence and jump over. No one was stopping you'd give a fiver to a geezer who would just put a ladder up against the fence and jump over no one was stopping you it was crazy and also the idea that Glastonbury is so mainstream now

I cannot stress enough how alternative and different it was even in the 90s like I was a bit of I think I've said this to you before but I was a bit of an anomaly

as far as I liked playing football I was quite sporty but I also really liked music and I was playing for my football team at the time and um it was like something to do with the fact they were going to go and do like a little post-season little tour or jaunt or something and I couldn't go because I got Glastonbury tickets and they relentlessly ripped the piss out of me for going to Glastonbury you're grebo this you're hippie that you've yeah you're whatever it is.

It was relentless. These days, I mean, you wouldn't be surprised if all the young kids playing for football teams would be going to Glastonbury, right? Yeah, oh, definitely. Like, it became very, very middle class very quickly. It became very acceptable very quickly. Like me, actually. I became very, very middle class very, very quickly.

Up until the age of 25, I'd never even tried an olive. Now, you watch me go now. With a what? With a big bowl of olives? No, I don't actually really like olives. Again, very quickly. Up until the age of 25, I'd never even tried an olive. Now you watch me go now. With a what? With a big bowl of olives? No, I don't actually really like olives. Again, poor example, but you understand the point I'm making. You don't like gherkins or olives.

I think vinegar is more your issue. Anything a bit vinegar, No, because I love pickled onions. It's my favourite food. I'll eat pickled onions until it repeats on me. I find myself, as i get older i keep eating things that i forget really strip the enamel off my teeth yeah um anything on your knee gherkin

i could only have a few before the the meal afterwards i just i cannot eat because my teeth are screaming at me yeah i find that with haribos i can't eat a haribo without my teeth oh yes yeah that's a good shout sarah brought me home some uh big fan of a product called sweet arts and it's like american these big american discs that are like sour and sweet and they uh and they sort of melt in your mouth and just talking about those make me salivate and uh and they're just different colors and flavors these dusty just dusty discs and uh and uh she brought me on some dusty discs. Dusty discs? Pete's dusty discs. She brought me some and

I ate half a packet and now my teeth hurt, my stomach hurts. I think I've isolated what the issue is with the old stomach. So don't worry about that Crohn's disease guys. I think it's just because I ate a lot of sweets. So many people were concerned about your potential endoscopy. It's very sweet sweet they hadn't listened to anything about your diet over

the last four years hey i've got a cold i've got a cold at the moment like things when you've got a cold it's like now you don't want to like give it to anyone because you like you feel like because we're covered and stuff like you know i maintained myself a couple of times, it's not COVID but I didn't want to stick around yesterday at work because I had a cold and so you sort of, like nowadays I think the cold is going to be the new

you stay at home now, this is perfect for the work I think don't we generally have a rule at Slack anyway that if you've got a cold you should stay home, unless you have to be in for a show or whatever because otherwise it just rips through the team yeah so you're not listening on that day yeah but I'm not I wasn't in the

if someone's off on the Ramble it is a colossal shit show to get anyone back and Jim was on the show and Jim lives the closest I think Jim should live in the stacked towers. Yeah, just be the ready-made replacement at any point. Yeah, behind emergency glass.

He should have a little room, and we smash it if we need him. No, because if you smash the glass around Jim, it'll cut him. It'll cut him to bits. It'll just carotid artery him instantly, and he'd die. Let's have a break. But Pete, when we come back, speaking of football, I want to talk about something that will be of interest to our listeners is that my old football team from back in the day,

they're now reformed as a veterans team and they're currently on tour. Oh, nice. Yeah, the Instagram's amazing. We'll talk about it after this. We're back with a look at Pete Shaw. Luke Moor's miserable old football team is amazing. We'll talk about it after this. We're back with a look at Pete Shaw. Luke Mower's miserable old football team is back.

Some of the listeners, mate, you want to rephrase that? You want to say that to my friend Carl Hitchcock? Do you want to say that to him? I do want to say that to Carl Hitchcock. He doesn't know where I live.

Great left back who used to run himself into the ground so much that I think he's now only 50 and has got a hip replacement. Yeah? You said that about a man like

Carl Hitchcock. You should be ashamed of yourself. Hip replacements are as soon as I'm allowed one, I'm getting one. The one thing that anyone who's had a hip replacement says is, I wish I'd done that 20 years ago. So as soon as I'm allowed one, I'm getting it bashed right in. I'm going to put them in my

arms. Alan Partridge always talks about the different types you can get. You definitely want to go for the PVC laminate, which encourages bone growth over the joint. This kind of stuff. So definitely go for that one. Don't go for the crap one. Don't get like a wood one. It's probably expensive, by the way, isn't it? Say again? They're probably expensive.

Yeah, probably. On the NHS. Anyway, so the great Cornwall Rangers, who I played for for a number of years as a kid. I was an adolescent, I guess. It's a men's team, but I played for them a number of years as a kid I was like an adolescent I guess it's a men's team but I played for them from the age of 16 they're back on tour

and they've been posting all their all their photos the stuff they've been up to on this tour plan against the two or three Portuguese teams and because

they are they are a bunch of lads and because they love to booze and they love to do their thing they've got this they've posted a photo of the rules of the tour about what's acceptable behavior and what isn't okay so because i remember playing football with you once a five-a-side tournament where uh the lads had set up like behind the goal

like a little mojito table and they were making mojitos so So I'm thinking none of that's going on. It's like that, but not as much organisation. So basically, I'm going to give you a couple of the rules that they're adhering to for a whole week while they're in Portugal. One of them is everyone will have been given a personalised card which must always be kept on their person. This will be a whistle and when someone blows the whistle you must produce your card above your head the last person to do this will have to push out 10 press-ups right when you hear two blasts of the whistle you must statue yourself

at that point until the whistle blows again at 10 press-ups if you don't do it last person down for breakfast every morning 10 press-ups no show for breakfast 20 press-ups if you don't do it. Last question down for breakfast every morning, 10 press-ups. No show for breakfast, 20 press-ups. And then basically it's all these different rules that essentially evolve. If you offend worse and worse,

you basically have to buy a round of drinks for everyone all the time. Right, okay. So how long are these guys on tour for? A week. A week, right.

I think they're two days in. I'd be very surprised if they're sticking to these rules now. Because you're basically making it so awkward for yourself. It's loads of stuff like left-handed drinking only. If you're the last person to finish your pint in the round, you've got to down the next one.

All this kind of stuff. The admin alone. But you need two or three people in the group to administer the rules. And then kind of people... I think it's important to instill a sense of camaraderie in the first couple of days of the rules. And then kind of people... I think it's important to instil a sense of camaraderie in the first couple of days of the trip. But then after a while, I mean, people are just going to not adhere to these rules.

I know, and I think it's too much. It's proper hashtag lads behaviour. I am absolutely delighted. It's one of those weird things for me because the guys I know that still play, I love dearly. It's a weird thing for me though because I am absolutely

delighted that it's happening and the only thing that makes me more delighted is that I'm not there. Because I'd last about five minutes. It's this kind of I like sort of it's almost like a bit of schadenfreude. This looks like

a lot of fun but not too much fun. I'm enjoying the limitations of your trip. It looks like a lot of fun but not too much fun i'm enjoying the limitations of your of your it looks like a lot of fun but on the other hand i am 41 years old that's what it feels like to me so listen i've not got any results of how their games are going so far i think they're playing two or three games i'll let you know once they post the first result but shout out cornwall range is always very good to me enjoy playing for them back in the day um and you know in another world another timeline maybe i'd there, but I wouldn't be able to handle it. I wouldn't be able to do the drinking. I can't even run

anymore, so I couldn't contribute anything on the field either. So it's best I'm not there, but I do wish them all the very best. Portuguese attackers have found themselves un-kicked, un-tripped. Oh yeah, because everyone's pissed. And they will breathe a sigh of relief.

Everyone's pissed anyway. Have you ever been on a football tour Peter? no at school we went to Club Rouge oh yeah

that's pretty cool we played football in Club Rouge and in the stadium so one of my first 11 assigned matches was Club Rouge for your school team

for school team yeah that's lovely stuff it was a lot of fun I very much enjoyed it you'd never mentioned that before I think I did

probably on the ramble to be honest you've really got a kind of I've only got a limited amount of stories and I don't know whenever we've got

like a new show that we're doing I just sort of worry that I've only got a limited amount of stories I think if you were going to be found out you would have been found out by now wouldn't you that is true I just sort of worry that I've only got a limited amount of stories. I think if you were going to be found out, you would have been found out by now, wouldn't you?

That is true. But we've been doing this for a very, very long time. I think this time has passed for worrying about that kind of thing. I mean, people either like you or they don't, right? I reckon if someone did some proper forensic in-depth analysis of this show and found out how many times certain stories have been told it would be way up there so 20 new uh it's a little we're a little bit like um a seinfeld or a jerry seinfeld or a i'm trying to think of famous um celebrity stand-ups in america they only add like five percent uh new stuff to a new show people actually go to hear the hits hear the greatest hits i quite like that though like the amount of times i've. The amount of times I've been sat around the dinner table

with friends and people you've known for a while or whatever and after a couple of drinks or whatever, someone will go, oh, tell this so-and-so story. And you still really enjoy it. It's like, it's still, it's interesting one to hear how the stories develop and sort of change and mould with memory,

but also it's just funny to be in the presence of someone hearing that story for the first time when you already know it but you know yeah but you know for a fact but i mean the difference is you don't go out and then buy a t-shirt saying dinner party 2022 uh on the way out to tell everyone that you really enjoyed it i won't give it to my now well we had a dinner party last night peter you didn't attend so you did i had a call didn't want to give everyone the sniffles did I fair enough brave

so the place we went to is the same place as last time for those listening it's a restaurant called Premier in North London delicious we go there because it's got a big round table

and a private room and it's not it's just much more conducive to having a good crack with the whole team and everyone from Stat goes it's like a big podcasting table yeah it is actually.

But they do it in a family style. So they bring, it's what they call in America, family style, right? Where you just bring loads of food out in the middle and you just help yourself kind of thing. Yeah. And it's actually really nice.

And you remember last time we had beef, Pete, and it was really good? Yes. It was like a proper little roast dinner, but in the evening. Yeah. It was fun. Lots of fun.

But this time I did kind of similar stuff, but instead of beef, it was chicken with Nduja sauce. Okay. Have you had Nduja sauce? And do you like it? Is it wicked? Yeah, it was nice. It was really nice. I'll just let you know.

I'm just using the new Pete show because I haven't actually spoken to you since last night to say that it's actually a nice time and you were missed, mate. Well, Luke, do you know what I like to eat? Is it batteries? It's batteries. It's batteries, yes, batteries. Because it's a Thursday, we're doing batteries. If you found an interesting battery in something you own, we want to hear from you.

We want to hear from you. We left this to the right, to the end of the show. Let's get them done. Last week, we had a hat trick of brand new players. Can we do it again is the question. Looking at some of these rotters, probably not. Gary has got in touch my girlfriend took me

on a surprise trip to Slovakia for my birthday as soon as we got to the accommodation the remote controls came out and I had to check

for some potential new players we are ruining relationships it's a fucking illness we've got some we've got some Tinko

and some Omni remotes keep up the good work Gary Tinko I'm fairly certain they're not new. I think we've seen them before because it reminds me of the TV show. Is it Tenco?

Yeah. And Omni remotes, that sounds like one we will have already heard of. Yeah, it's two no's, I'm afraid, Gary. Gary, sorry, mate. It wasn't even worth ruining a surprise trip that your girlfriend planned for you, mate. And that probably reset something in the air con remotes, and for the rest of the holiday you couldn't get the air con working. Awful stuff.

Greg, hello, lads. I've recently returned from the home of the Bexel, South Korea, and offer you up these Funtra Digitals. Any chance they're a new player, or have they already been sent in 20 times, including someone last week? Greg. So weirdly enough when I first saw this pop in

to the running order courtesy of producer Rory I thought these would be a new player. Thundra. But Greg is unfortunately the second person to send in Thundra. Oh, unlucky Greg. That's as close to being a new player

as it can be. Yeah, Andrew Law sent them in on the 1st of April last year. And the Law won. And the Law won. Andrew Law has beaten you to the punch, I'm afraid. Unlucky, mate. But thank you very much for trying anyway.

Cheers, Greg. Unlucky. Silas has got in touch. Hey, chaps, love your work, and I'm surprised how much I enjoy this segment after four years. Some people hate it. Some people get really vexed about it now. It's funny.

Well, what I like about this show is that they probably thought they were getting away with no batteries and we just right at the end we give them the sucker punch we forgot to do it

and then Rory came on and said do it please it's Thursday alright yeah okay right fine no we just fucking say be honest mate that happened as well

hey chaps love your work and I'm surprised how much I enjoy this segment after four years but a literal little battery acid on the hands later from this old Canadian AC remote,

I might have a new player. May I present to you the XRD Zinked, as in X-I, X-Inked, basically. X-Inked, X-Inked, the XRD X-Inked. Keep up the great work, Silas. I don't think I've ever heard of these ones before. And it's weird that we remember which ones we've seen before and which ones we haven't, in my opinion. Yeah, it is. So, Silas, first of all all there's a lot of fucking things to get through here and

i want to make sure i'll do them all silas great name great to hear it's a fantastic name secondly xrd zinc are a new player so congratulations uh well done mate you're the only person this week to get a new player entering the game so well done thirdly and i cannot stress this enough based on the photo you've attached here you really need to put that straight in the bin and wash your hands because those batteries look like they are 50 years old and i'm going to poison someone at some point and if it's not you i don't want to be anyone else so please please put them in the bin and wash your hands delicious great one out of three we didn't maintain the standard of last week it's not what i never understand difficult to about

leaky batteries is like the after a while they start to get all like powdery and white yeah i just wonder what this is it just the paper breaking down inside i can't figure out i was raised to be absolutely terrified of battery acid. Oh, yeah. It was like the scariest thing you could possibly deal with. Yeah, I mean, you know, I killed... You know, they threatened Roger Rabbit with it. It just acid in a big vat.

Battery acid just felt so destructive. The word acid obviously just freaks you out, right? Yeah. That's definitely part of it. I don't like it. Yeah. All right, Pete, that's probably it, isn't it, for Thursday? Should we get out of here don't like it yeah alright Pete that's probably it isn't it

for Thursday should we get out of here certainly is unless Rory's got something for us to do at the end let's just say goodbye now drop the email

address and the socials because you didn't do that earlier either you naughty sausage alright then hello go fuck yourself dog

you know we do the absolute radios we did the absolute radios about six months after you left absolutely hello at lucapeachshow.com if you'd like to get in touch with the show and that's also where you can send your battery brands are also on twitter we're also on instagram and that's where you can check out uh me and luke in a car park some cctv footage of us both just dicking about yeah um and

all kinds of stuff really my uh my meal was posted last week I believe the chilli slash air fried crab sticks slash cheese I made when my partner was away it really is, no surprise I'm unwell we are the only people that I know of who are posting things on Instagram which makes people less likely to want

to follow we're like reverse influencers no not affluencers. Effluviancences. We're repellent to influence. We're fucking scumbags. See you on Monday. Alright, ta-ta.

The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network.