The Luke and Pete Show - Language Manipulator

Episode Date: November 7, 2024

Today, the lads take on the entertainment world, covering everything from Mr Tumble to Homeland, and how 80s TV stars keep walking into radio gigs. Luke asks if Pete’s ever thought about acting, but Pete’s not convinced he’d remember his lines - until he has a brainwave: films would be wrapped up much faster if actors just had earpieces feeding them their lines. We’re looking at you, Marlon Brando and Johnny Depp...Elsewhere, Luke gets defensive about his keyboard, sorry “electric piano”, and the lads dive into a hot debate: who’s the greatest lyricist in rap history? Luke’s got one answer, and he’s pretty sure it’s the only right one.Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram.***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!*** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

A-Laps, running order, engage! It's the Luke and Pete, your Pete Donaldson with you, joined by Mr Luke Emu and it is Thursday the 7th of November. I do hope you're keeping well, however you are listening to this. Maybe the election has been called one way or the other in the US, those who are listening over the pond, because it may take a very long time this time round. Hasn't been called by the time we're recording this, so who knows? It hasn't, no. There's been a lot of polls, I'd love to be a pollster, I'd love to just ring up random

people in the phone book and go, hey how you doing, who are you going to be voting for? I'm going to babadook babadook babadook. And that is why you can't be a pollster. Why not? So many reasons in just one sentence as to why you can't be one. What are you going to do? Just going to ring a lot of people up in the phone book? Requiem.

Do a Limey Requiem and everyone. Just do a Requiem down the phone. Whatever they say, I'm going for Harris, I'm going for Trump, I'm going to go, oh that's a bad idea, whatever they say. No, I thought what you should do is you should call them and say, hello, it's Pete Donaldson, polling services. Which way are you voting this November? And whatever they say, whatever answer, you just got to go,

ooh, that's a spicy meatball, and hang up. Every single time. Well, that's a shame. I was about to give you money. Yeah, but you've got to call everything they say a spicy meatball. Whoa, that's a hot tamale! I don't think I've ever had a proper tamale. I've only ever had one of those sweets that they call hot tamales.

Is it tamale? Just like a wrapped up kind of like a little Mexican sandwich. I mean they call them wraps and stuff but... It's that kind of um... It's like enchilada. It's made of masa. So like it's got, I don't think you can fill it in whatever you want with whatever you want. The first I ever heard of tamales, which caused me to look up tamales.

Tamales? In a, I think in an Encyclopedia Britannica, so that dates it. Was the Robert Johnson song, I think the an Encyclopedia Britannica, so that dates it. Right, okay. Was the Robert Johnson song, I think the song is called Their Red Heart, but it's about tamales. Oh, what, are you talking about a little sandwich? He goes, heart tamales in the red heart, man she gone for seal I mean, man she gone for seal.

I think it's a metaphor Peter. Oh right, for boobies. I think it might be a metaphor for... For boobies I reckon. Maybe not boobies, maybe the other one? The other one? Yeah, down there, down south. South of the Mexican border. They would...

The Wiggles song Hot Potato, Hot Potato, their biggest track was actually... Is it their biggest track? Is it their biggest... Is that their Mercury winning one? Is that Mr Brightside? They it their biggest... Is that their Mercury winning one? It's their Mr. Brightside. They are... it used to be called Hot Tamale, Hot Tamale, but it didn't make it. They changed it for a British audience. Well I think they changed it for an international audience and I think they just sort of thought,

well we can't really do the actions. What is the action for Tamale? I mean Hot Potato is like boobs and Tamale would look like a penis. Oh God, it's a nightmare isn't it? What do they do crucially? I'm really distracted. Do you know the TV show Homeland Luke? Yes.

Don't look off on the Wiggles. I was astonished to realise after you mentioned the Wiggles before that they were formed in 1991. Yeah, there's the OG set for them. Can't be the same people. were formed in 1991? Yeah there was the OG set for them, four Aussie men there's one remaining member and the daughter of that remaining member which I'm just obsessed with the Wiggles story I think it's an amazing heartwarming you know Mr Blobbit, not Mr Blobbit he wasn't really for kids was he? Mr Tumble? Well Mr Tumble is he still kicking a ball? Is he still doing bits and bobs?

The king of formats Mr Tumble! I tell you what a ball? Is he still sort of doing bits and bobs? Oh the king of formats, Mr Tumble. I tell you what, I'd probably love to have him in our company doing IP. He's a king of formats man. Right, well sometimes he's Justin, sometimes he's a milkmaid, sort of antique sort of character who sort of says things incorrectly, like a South African. And he, sometimes he's just normal Mr. Tumble clown man, sometimes he's a chef, sometimes he's his own granddad. The faces and facets of Mr. Tumble should be studied. I do find his whole, I do find his Jeffrey humorous. He's full of

so much, he's full of so much... Vim and Vigga. Yeah, content though. You look at it on his Wikipedia page, notable work, fun song factory, tweenies, Tinkerbiller, something special, Shaun the Sheep. Shaun the Sheep themes have been done by Vic Reeves, I believe as well. Justin's House, that's your classic. Timmy Time. I reckon what he's doing is he's on that BBC gravy train, right? He's developed so I reckon what he's doing is he's on that BBC gravy train, right? He is, yeah.

He's developed his shows. Whatever he pitches is getting made because it's nice and cheap. You can do it in the grounds of an estate and you can just do whatever the hell you want. I would say that the last time I did saw see Mr Tumbo, I don't know whether you want to inform your child about this. Terrible news. He was all set to be in a fashion show but he was showing off the jumper he was gonna wear. He accidentally got some cordial on it and he had to put it in the wash which meant that the jumper became very

small. It happens to me every week. You do have a lot of woolen goods I would say, Lukey Mo. I would say if anybody wears... I've had to throw it back on them. Really? Okay. Because you just made them small in the washer. I've got a couple of bits that only ever really wear occasionally. I know can't be washed unless I take them to the dry cleaners or whatever. Right, okay. I would say that it's worth pointing out,

before we move on from The Wiggles to the TV show Homeland, which would be quite the juxtaposition I'm sure, is that Justin Fletcher aka Mr Tumble, he started out with working with Dave Benson Phillips. Did he really? Is that how he started? He got his stripes with DBP? Then didn't DBP have this kind of secondary career where he just ended up going to like student unions in like an ironic way and everyone was like, oh, Dave Benson Phillips, you want to get left? Don't they all do that?

Don't they all do that eventually? But I mean, Justin's never been forced into sort of doing that. Mallet did it. Pat Sharp from Fun House, who if you've ever seen around, he he likes chatting to the ladies which is fine which is absolutely fine he's very flirty he's a very flirty man that's that's it really that's all I've got on him. Have you worked with the guy? I've seen him in a radio context because if you make your career if you're on telly in the 80s or 90, that means you can be on radio and get pretty decent radio jobs for the rest of your life. I think that's how it works.

That's where you want to go though, doesn't it? Because people sort of go, hey, it's that guy from that thing from the 80s from my nostalgia and my past. And do you also reckon back in the 80s and 90s to be on TV you had to be pretty good, like pretty technically good? Mmm, yes. Yes, I think you probably had to be a little bit more adept. Because I don't think, what they used to do back then is they used to have proper training things, the BBC obviously they were only taking it from a very kind of small pool of people but they would be trained properly and stuff. Right, are you thinking more of the the more serious journalists rather than a man who

had a fun house? No, I think if you walked into, a fun was ITV anywhere, I think. So scratch that. But if you're walking into the BBC in the eighties or nineties and any on air capacity, they had a huge amount of staff, huge budgets, and they were probably putting people through training is what I'm saying. Yeah, there was a way of doing things. If you're on a BBC contract, you kind of had to do a certain amount of training. But I imagine I've never received a single piece of training, but I imagine. I've never received a single piece of training

for anything I've ever done. No, I think I've always thought about it would be quite, you know when you sort of look at like, I can't use Adobe Premiere, I've never been able to use it. I don't have the time to learn, but I do look at those courses and I sort of go, I could go on one of those courses and I could learn something like I've not

Learned anything for 20 years What you making those ramble live videos on them? That's Sony Vegas or magic Vegas People not use Vegas in the industry. Yeah. No, they're very much Basically, it's a very old I think it came from like a music package and they converted it for video and they that's where the from like a music package and they converted it for video and they that's where the newfangled stuff ended and they're just trying to sort of like retcon like little kind of improvements here and there and they've got a

subscription model but it's the only thing I can use because it's it's the thing that I used first at XFM so then as it all goes you kind of... What were you doing with it at XFM? Again it was just practically a music thing, just doing music stuff. The future heads onto the body of some animals for a festive celebration or something. That sounds absolutely lovely.

That sounds absolutely lovely. Loki, the thing at the homeland, the older fellow who's in homeland, who was in The Princess Bride. I'll show you a picture of what I can see basically. Yeah, I know who he is, yeah. I'm currently sort of on a- Manny Patinkin his name is. That's his name, yes.

For some reason, because as discussed, my phone camera folder started just showing massive desktop images on my computers. And one of my screens is just a massive picture images on my computers and one of my screens is just a massive picture of Mr Potemkin and... It's not called Potemkin, it's Mandy Potinkin. Oh Potinkin, right okay. Potemkin is the town that doesn't exist. But I'm going to turn him off because he looks like he's boring a hole into my soul and I can only talk one bearded man.

A lot of gravitas. Yeah, I think he admits that he was a bit of a dickhead in the 80s though, as we all were. Doesn't narrow it down, does it? Doesn't narrow it down, no. If you work in the entertainment industry in the 80s, you're probably going to fall and fall out of a bit of that. Do you think that as you got older, because you know, basically gravitas tends to come with experience and with age and you know, for example, I mean,

the aforementioned Robert Johnson is probably an exception, but generally speaking, you know, blues artists, you, most people want to hear from them when they're old and they've got a story to tell, right? Yeah, yeah. And it's probably the same with actors. Like, I mean, I know that we mentioned this before, but say an Al Pacino will say,

he doesn't really have to do much now, as an actor who just wanders into the shot and raises an eyebrow because he's Al Pacino. Do you see in your future a potential acting career? Because I think, and I'll preface this by saying, you are pretty good in front of camera, you are pretty natural, you don't mind making a bell under yourself,

which apparently is a massive part of it. James Gandolfini said that when he wanted to be an actor, he went to this acting class and he was really nervous and he was really kind of self-conscious. And his acting tutor got him up on stage in front of all the other potential actors and students and was like, right, just do this, do that and do that. And it involved him doing an incredible amount

of embarrassing stuff, losing his temper, the angle, that kind of stuff. And afterwards, the tutor said to him, there you go. See, nothing's happened. No one, no, no one died. It's fine. You're still here. You just let go of all that self-consciousness. Yeah. Um, and, and you, and you're going to be a much better actor. Can you see in your future, because you're not an incredibly self-conscious person when it comes to performing, can you see yourself bringing that gravitas to bear and in your future because you're not an incredibly self-conscious person when it comes to performing. Can you see yourself bringing that gravitas to bear

and perhaps carving out a late stage acting career? I think like in the same way that you're talking about basically debasing yourself for coins, I'm probably more likely to be one of those kind of like wearing sleepwear in the street kind of heavy drinkers. I think that's probably how I'll go. Alan Rickman's first movie Die Hard.

Why did he? They always talk about these guys who were like, oh yeah, his first main role was Die Hard. I mean, he must have had a role before that. Like, you don't just get, you just walk into a casting and go, I'm going to be a bad naughty terrorist. And you just get given that role. I don't know how you would do, I don't know how you just get gifted that massive role, that iconic role in an iconic film. I don't know how you just get gifted that massive role that iconic role in an iconic film I don't know so I looked on IMDB and it is genuinely listed that his first role in film was was Hans Gruber in Die Hard but of course he did TV and stage before that right okay yeah well how long was that going on how long has this been going on, Rickman? He was doing Shakespeare and stuff, wasn't he? So I think people were... I don't think...

He's probably alright, he's probably alright, isn't he? He's probably doing the hard yards. I don't think the casting director and John McTiernan was like, well, take a flower on this guy. You know, he might better do it. Who's saying he can't do it? I think they probably did watching and other stuff before. It must be quite weird sort of using like child actors because their work must surely

by their very definition be quite variable. And a lot of like... It is very poor. Have you not watched any of it? Well, a lot of... Yeah, it is. But like a lot of like Harry Potter and stuff, these kids were like just out of school, just given huge roles comparatively to performing.

It must be possible. They're awful in them as well I know that Daniel Radcliffe has gone and had something of a career Emma Watson, my personal view is that she seems absolutely lovely and I really like the cut of her jib whenever I see her interviewing and stuff but she's not a very good actor and the other fella, I can't think of anything else he's done. The fella, Weasley? What's Weasley been up to? Has he just sort of like, he's sort of opted out hasn't he?

He's just got to be like, I can't be arsed with this. Yeah, and I think the, I'm not sure what he's doing really, but the famous example of a child actor I'd like to bring to the table would be the guy Danny Lloyd who plays Danny, I think he's called that, Danny isn't he, the boy in The Shining? Right, okay, did he go on to do good stuff or? No, I think he refused to do any more acting after about a year or two after The Shining and I think he works in education now, he's like a professor at university or something. Well you've peaked, you've done one of the most iconic horror films

in the universe. It's not going to get any better than that is it? And Stanley Kubrick apparently a selected him because of all the kids they looked at he was the one who could maintain his concentration the most. Right. Which apparently was key for this particular movie obviously because it's quite a chilling horror movie. But they also took great, they also went to great pains to, for everyone to buy into the idea that they were making a comedy drama for him rather than a horror movie. So he was kept away from all the horrible stuff.

Oh. And they just didn't bother acting again. But he's absolutely chilling, isn't it? Maybe he felt tricked. Maybe he felt tricked by the whole thing. I thought I was gonna go into the cinema and watch a comedy action film or whatever it was. So he sat down with his kids like 15 years later.

I was like, right, right guys. 30 years later he sits down with his kids. I thought we'd watch a comedy, it's raining outside. That was a bit spooky. little little secret about daddy. See if you can spot me. What the fuck is that? I would also add that that if you if people will people will say, oh, you know,

the kids in Harry Potter aren't that bad. They are bad. That's right. This is how it is, especially when you compare them to say the kids in Str stranger things who are actually fucking decent But yeah, okay. Yeah, but like do you not think that that's a that's a different Discipline I guess Harry Potter probably wasn't I know it would have been absolutely huge wouldn't it? Why do they use so many just absolute randos from you know schools? They cast like Daniel Radcliffe from just from school

didn't they? I guess you kind of but I guess when all the children have to be English what what and talk like that you kind of you have to kind of go with school kids and you have to go you got to get them on mass and get them at scale I suppose. There's like a few people who like you know you like I've sort of met before who've been in like big scenes in Harry Potter and stuff but I'm not gonna spot them because I've never I think I've seen half of one or maybe just one it's all I'm sure I'm sure I've got it all to come in my future sit down watch it if you look at the say Gaten Matarazzo who plays Dustin the Strangers have you seen Stranger Things no he like years before Stranger Things? Uh, no.

He like years before Stranger Things, he was like bringing the house down in like Les Mis and stuff. Right. Okay. Yeah. He's like super talented. He's done loads of stuff. He's done loads of stuff before Stranger Things.

He, he, he's, um, so I think it's probably, they probably went out of their way to find like genuinely really good people. Whereas like in Harry Potter, they did maybe a slightly different way I suppose. Bigger net, bigger net. And Hollywood's massive, anyone wants to be in it. But you didn't answer my question, could you see yourself, because part of what we do is a little bit acty isn't it? I think so, but no, because acting's one of the most difficult things that you can do, and I've always been terrible at it, and I don't, people who think that they can just

walk through the doors of performance in that direction I think it's I just I can't remember stuff but once I start thinking about what I'm doing I can't walk properly like it's it's not it's a really it's a really it's them all those difficult things I think a human can do I watch Sarah do self tapes and stuff. I'm like, A, how she remembered that B, what's why she moved the lamp over there and C, C, like it's somewhat it's like she's incredible. She's incredible. And like even she like, like, yeah, it's just, it's just an insane thing to do an insane thing to, to, to, to manage to, to perform like that. I have the ultimate respect for actors because it's really bloody hard. So there you go, no acting for us.

As, what's the guy's name who plays Logan Roy, fuck off. Oh, Brian Cough. Fuck off. Said, it's much harder to remember lines as you get older. And by some point point even like some point Brando was getting people just to put the lines or cue cards at eye level wasn't he for people to read them I don't know why that's not I don't know why would would films just not be quicker would would you have more confidence as a director that you're that you're

gonna get like you just saved much more time if actors had earpieces in getting fed lines and you didn't have to learn any of the lines you could just spaff them out as quickly as possible and get them in the next scene. Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean? Is that what he did? Oh yeah that was exposed in the old trial wasn't it? He had an earpiece in, not the worst thing he did according to that trial but you know worthy of note nonetheless.

Alright let's take a break when we come back we've got a load more batteries to potentially enter into the Battery Daddy Peter. Potemkin in yeah alright lovely. It's Battery Daddy time we've got a hungry Battery Daddy who needs to be fed so get on board for crying out loud if you found a battery and something that you've got we wanted to see it if you find some in a shop you got to buy them to get in the batch your daddy but if you want to pick them up send a picture over to hellolougepetio.com and we will go through your filthy cells. Luke has come in with one. My son's birthday was yesterday and he got a new RC car. I don't think radio, I don't think RC car enthusiasts

should call it RC because radio controlled car is absolutely fine. Or just shorten it to radio car, I will know what it means. Inside the controller was some Shooley, some new players. A R R M A Arma. Arma, which I think was some kind of tank based video game back in the day. Look at the design on the battery, it makes the two hours back to back like a mask Yeah, I don't like it. It's really scary. It's weird New players, yeah

From from one Luke to another Armour are very much a new place. Congratulations. I don't yeah, you're right I don't like the way they've sort of turned the are backwards to make a kind of Well, it wouldn't be a Viking mask, what kind of mask would that be? It looks like the guy... Spartan mask, yes, that rapper who died... used to wear one, didn't he? That rapper who died... The greatest minister of the English language in history.

You want to stand by that? Right, put that in the synopsis and we'll have some emails to hellolookbeachyour.com. I don't think anyone could seriously argue he isn't the greatest lyricist in rap history. Right, but that's not what you said. You said he was the greatest manipulator of language. I'm not having that. Why? Well we'll full well know it's me. Afternoon Jam says Andrew.

Accidentally most of the time. Accidentally. Andrew says I'm a laps summer boy, day one listener and semi-regular contributor as well as the admin behind Diggory Dopple on X. Yes, Andrew. Thank you for your fine work. I've sent that to neighbours. That's how.

Because when somebody goes, hey this is the person who looks at you and I'll go get in the fucking queue mate. Sorry, do you guys know what I do for a living? Do you want to come over and have a look? Do you have a party and then you share everyone all the stuff you've done and you end with the Twitter feed that someone set up about you? Correct, correct. I moved out last week and whilst shaking out a dust sheet in the garden, I saw something in the grass glinting in the afternoon sunshine. Behold! An AA branded performance AASL.

It's AA branded AA, which is confusing. If this is a new player, could it be that the battery gods are looking favorably down on my new home and blessing me with their elusive and delicious cells? Or perhaps my house is built on some kind of ancient battery-based burial ground? Which is a lovely thing to say. Either way, I'm hoping I hear the good news from you too and that I haven't embarrassed myself by sending in a battery that is pathetically common as your pair, dears, or your GP elders of this world of this world.

Yours in alkaline, Andrew from Cornwall, and thank you for sorting out the Degree Doppel, it is much appreciated. Any love for the old performance A.A. cell? You just said on the first submission they've got to be bought. So make your mind up. No, it's owned. It's on Andrew's land. He has battery mining rights from the sky to the flat. We need to see the deeds, Andrew, of your home. We need to see the deeds. Does it incorporate any kind of batteries? Yeah, exactly. Any batteries, Farrokh. I can't find

anything in the inbox or any of my different techniques for searching for these batteries Where a performance is involved so at the moment? I'm gonna tentatively award them new player status. Yeah, no one wants to get in touch and say no I sent them in myself. I wish I do wish that we'd started a batteries at Com email address because that would make looking for things like words like performance a little bit easier because we're always having to go at Jay Comfrey's podcast so I imagine we've put out a few minutes about that. Daffod, lovely to have you along Daffod, dearest to look at the Pete's I recently changed the battery in my Cobo e-reader pen, wow which I managed to leave on a Royal Air flight to Lanzarote

last week much like Pete's I have a penchant for misplacing items. That's a reputation I shouldn't have because I'm pretty good at that sort of thing, but I have left an e-reader on a plane. The good news is that despite fruitless calls to customer services at Ryanair and the airport and almost giving up on ever seeing it again, eventually a passenger who'd accidentally picked it up on the return flight contacted me and I was reunited with the reader when I got back to the UK. Sounds very much like absolute bullshit and a crisis of confidence Conscience my thanks to Carol and Warwick who I doubt listen to this drivel anyway. Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh, oh Luke

Pear dear is my entry mmm Look at the so originally we're like well per day get in the bin There's no point worrying about it with a hundred of them. But look what he says next. Right a Quadruple air battery must be a rare find in the battery daddy, which may make it a more exotic entry So I shall remain hopeful We've never had a quadruple a before ever battery is that My god when Never had a quadruple A before, ever. Battery. Is that... My God.

When did the quadruple battery arrive? When did... Microsoft's never heard of it before. Me neither. I'm looking on the Wikipedia. Oh, okay. Okay, so they're basically the sort of battery kind of that are inside a nine volt battery, if that makes sense. So they're basically the sort of battery

kind of that are inside a nine volt battery, if that makes sense? You know like the LR64, 61 cells that are- So it's two quadruple A's next to each other in a nine volt battery. In a nine volt battery you usually get six or maybe four batteries together. And a quadruple A battery is very similar to that.

I had no idea that a quadruple air battery is very similar to that. I had no idea that a quadruple air battery existed. I would like very much to know when they were invented. But they they they. So you're letting it in then? I'm letting it in because it's a lovely little cell. 1.5 volts, 42.5 millimeter long and 8.3 millimeter in diameter. I'm absolutely blown away by that. So maybe we did go with brands, but I think for this sort of test case,

the quadruple A pair deer used mainly in the Microsoft Surface pen, we have to let it in just because of love and love for the brand, love for the pair of people and love for batteries in general. So yeah, well done. I think the very first quadruple A battery submission has got to be a hallmark event and I think I totally agree.

It has to happen. And the battery daddy probably doesn't even have a hole for a quadruple A. We'll have to drill our own. We'll do that later. We'll have to get a drill bit that's 8.3mm in diameter to get it in. Congratulations, Daffod. Now, we normally only get three entries, but we've got a special extra entry this week, haven't we, Peter?

Look at this email from Liam and let us know what you think about this. Yes. Yeah, yeah, okay. Hello, men. I'm coming in hot here with a never before seen pair of batteries. I'm currently in France in a rental property, and I have a pair of Panasonic alkalines. They seem like fairly basic pitch batteries and nothing new at all but when I tell you they are bedside tables slash stools your pants will pop off.

Your pants suitably popped off. Here is the picture. And yeah there's two kind of drum shaped sort of seats with Panasonic alkaline like giant battery branding and yeah and you sit on them. So I used to have a store exactly like that with exactly the same cushion on top, same material, same shape, same everything but it was Ghostbusters themed. It looks like it might give you piles, it doesn't look particularly well. They weren't that comfortable.

It wasn't a fantastic, it wasn't, I think I got it, because I think what happens is you see, so if you look at the photo now, you see where the foam kind of seat on top is. If you see the rim, there's a kind of gap between them. You can lift that off. Right. It's almost like a storage thing. Yes.

It's like a storage bin that's also a seat. Or a drum. And I used to store a load of, I think I might used to store a load of my guitar leads and stuff in it. Oh nice that's a lovely, a seat that is also a storage unit. It's such a rare, I know like pianists have been enjoying this for a long time but I think we should use it more. We should do more stuff to be honest. My piano store's got a little thing in it as well, a little section in it as well which I keep. Have you got a piano? Yeah. How did you get it? I always think about people who've got pianos, it's always like, the pianos are always done it

because no one ever wants a piano. You used to have two of them. I used to have two of them, that's true, yeah. Yeah, mine's just a standard issue Yamaha kind of electric piano. Oh, it's electric piano, right, not a full string. I've got a grand piano in my fucking house, have I? Yeah, you don't have to have a grand piano, you just have a stand-up piano, couldn't you? What you've got is not a piano. I doubt it's even a clavanova. Sounds very much like it's a keyboard, right?

No, it's an electric piano. It's exactly the same specifications as a piano, but it's electric. You send me the code and I'll investigate whether you have a piano or not. The last 20 years have not happened to you Peter. Listen, I started doing piano lessons and I got kiboshed by Covid so in the little piano store storage section there's a load of sheet music that I can neither read nor play. Oh good stuff. Well, sheet, do we need, surely nowadays, for the amateur musician do we really need the whole notation system?

Can we not have guitar tab? Can we not have a picture of the piano? Every new note is just where you put your finger. It just gives us something a little bit easier than reading music. Well, I used to be able to read music when I played the violin, but I can't now, because I've forgotten everything. I bet you were shit at the violin. I was terrible at the violin, but they did put me at the front, which is technically means your first chair.

But what actually means is they were trying to keep an eye on me because I had a little routine where I would do a lot of sort of miming, to pretend, in the orchestra. I love that you call that a little routine. That I've become known for. Mate, I'm not touching this fucking violin. Are you sure they knew because no music would be coming out?

No, because everyone else was playing, so how would you even know? A good conductor could know. Little Peter's violin wasn't making any noise. Would it not have been good for your asthma to do some kind of brass or woodwind instrument? I did, I used to play the trumpet, but then I moved schools Would it not have been good for your asthma to do like some kind of brass or woodwind instrument? I did, I used to play the corner, I used to play the trumpet but then I moved schools and then they gave me an ironically large tuba which I didn't need, a euphonium rather, didn't need that, I was only a little boy, don't need a big old umpa umpa bloody instrument

do I? Why did you move schools? Trouble, no I just, we were trying to get into the right catchment area for a good school. And by the time we got there, my first school was great. Fucking Ofsted. Absolute bastards. And so they gave you, what, so the old school or the new school gave you two? We moved away several houses to get into a good catchment area for a good school. Is that when the seacoal I went through your living room or was that the old house? That was the first school in a bad area but by the time we got to the new area, you know

15 years later or something, the first area school was really good. They'd put money into it. They had 4G pitches and everything. Hartlepool United used to train there sometimes. Awful, awful situation. Did they do all that investment after you left? Right now he's out of the way. Yeah, now he's out of the way. He's not going to ruin our exam results. But yeah, but I mean by the time I got, I mean to be fair it was a high risk sort of move because we weren't Christian or Catholic,

so it was a Catholic school. I don't know how I got in there and certainly wowed the head teacher certainly wowed the head teacher so much so that by the time my sister was able to get to big school she was not invited in which is disgraceful, utterly disgraceful. Listen, let him in, he does an amazing routine with the violin. Mmm, yeah. What's he doing, I tell you? Have you put resin on that board? No. I don't want you here or anything for crying out loud. Had you not done your practice?

Yeah, I think it's time to get out of here Luke. We've spoken for way too long to be crying out loud. We'll be back on Monday where hopefully I'll be less fractious and tired. But look after yourselves over the weekend. We'll be back on Monday the 11th of November and we'll be reviewing Luke's weekend. Farewell. The Luke and Pete show is a stack production and part of the A-Cast creator network.