The Luke and Pete Show - Let's round this up

Episode Date: October 20, 2024

This episode was supposed to be an email special but Pete got so animated about the idea of rounding up at the checkout when shopping that your missives had to take something of a backseat. When the boys did finally get to your emails, they read out messages from White Rock, British Columbia, Wisconsin *and* California including a message from someone who has just accidentally stolen some chicken goujons. Call the cops! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Oh, feel that hip-hop beat! It's the Luke of Pete Show. My name is Pete Donnison. I'm a man and only a man. Every atom of me is human and the less said about the rest of Luke Moore the better to be honest because Luke as we all know is part horse and I'm a bigger man than you you are a bigger man but that again is this horse thing though isn't it yeah it's great to be here anyway just skinny little bony legs yeah your lovely Fetlock I did say to you I did say to you that I wanted to be the person myself to tell our listenership that I am part horse. It was not your news to share.

I told you that in confidence when you attempted to 3D print me a new main. But I just wanted, when you sort of go out of view, people think that you're imbibing cocaine. Like they did that time on Talk Sport with Laura Woods. I don't think that happened though. I think you're saying that happened. Of course it didn't happen. Like she was clearly just, I think she was just sneezing or something. And the wrong ones who watched Talk Sport are going,

Oh, having a kee-ya, you love me, fucking with you. Who clearly have absolutely no concept of the idea that is a workplace. And like this is not going to happen. And they're on camera. It just makes no sense. Yeah but when you used to sort of dip your head out of people's shoes, you know, put two and two together. What are you talking about? I don't dip my head out of anything do I? You did because you were licking your little salt lick because you're a horse. You had a little bag full of oats you were munching on.

But people think that it's a drug problem, but it's not, it's an oat problem. It's a horse problem in many ways. So yeah. I tell this story a lot, but I remember- You just do way too much tranquilizer though. Yeah. I remember when, one of the first times I met you,

I had a glass of water with a lemon pip in it. And you had a far broader accent then than you've got now. And I didn't know you that well, so I couldn't work out the cadence of your speech as easily as I can now. Right, okay. And you kept saying to me, why have you got an oat in your drink? Why have you got an oat in your drink? But the way you were saying the word oat... It makes you sound like a pixie following you down the street of a tourist.

That's what it felt like to me. Why have you got an oat in your drink? Why have you got an oat in your drink? But the way you were saying the word oat was- Yeah, you were going, what? And I was going, oat? And you were going, what? What? What? What?

It was the weirdest sound I've ever heard anyone say. It was so odd to me, I had no idea. It was like Basil Faultian. And whatever his name was. Manuel, wasn't it? Manuel. I like that you think the most likely explanation for a lemon pip in a drink that's obviously got lemon in it is it out? I said before you look like a man who's got all on him

I look like I could be I definitely do look like I could be like I've got a bit of a scrumpy look about me every night Well, you got a lovely jumper on. We've both got lovely jumpers on. Yeah, there we go. Just two lovely boys and their lovely jumpers. Two lovely boys and their lovely jumpers. As some listeners occasionally say about us, nothing wrong with Luke and Pete. Lovely pair of boys. They do. Not that I won't have a word said against them to be honest. I'm tired I'm tired of this internet drama a bronze podcast a podcast I do sometimes Chris Oh Chris Broad oh he's upset the internet

because he had a go at mr. beast mr. mr. beast oh I think of mr. beast as being quite similar energy to Chris yeah vibe yeah well maybe I don't know I think Mr. Beasts, he's not really like at least like Chris Lavagote or gag but like Mr. Beasts is just this kind of like weird shark-eyed kind of he looks like he could omit an aught or two he's got like kind of like quite a red ruddy face I think. He's not as OT as me. Oh he's never gonna be as OT as you he hasn't got curly hair but he just looks like, the way that they sort of photoshop his kind of thumbnails are absolutely fascinating but yeah he kicked up a bit, he stirred up a bit of a

hornet's nest by slitting MrBeast and it turned out that a lot of internet really agreed with him but have you seen much of MrBeast's stuff? Yeah we talked about it before, I've seen a couple of his videos. I naively thought that the way he did the stuff he did was actually quite creative, but then there's a lot of kind of negative... I then subsequently read a load of kind of weird, almost like weird white saviour stuff he likes to do. Yeah, when he gave... he did catrack surgery on a hundred people or something. It's good stuff. Which is on paper.

I mean the world is quite complicated isn't it? Because on paper that's obviously quite a good thing to do. Yeah. I just always think charitable acts by corporations and at the scale of Mr. Beast, I mean that is, he's basically Microsoft. He's not really a creator anymore. He just kind of just does, you know, he just follows the algorithm and just does, you know, what's the biggest thing in the world a train I'm gonna smash a train

into another train and then boom and the children watch it. That does sound good to me. I'd like to see that can we watch it now? And can we do that? But on a very small 3d printed scale. Yeah and he just plays like that but he just kind of he kind of just does all that but I just when corporations do like charity stuff you know when you're at the petrol pump we spoke about before the loop picture when you get asked if you'd like to round up your money I always round up do you round up do you round up I do do yeah why just seems like the right thing to do. It's a tax write off, aren't it? For the company. They're not doing it all statistically. Yeah, but they're not doing it.

Then what do I care what the company's doing? Stop going round, don't just mind your own business. It's none of your business what they're doing. Do you give it to the McDonald's Foundation? I always round up, I don't know how else you want me to say it. You always round up? What? They always round up? It's just, but they're not doing it, they just tax right off. I refuse to be part of...

When I don't pay my tax on time, I refuse to pay their tax on time. Maybe you should take a leap out of their book. Get other people to round up for you. I'm going to start a charity. I've got a family for Peter. Will I spend on 3D printing resin? Well, that's up to me. That's my business.

Probably I will. And if you don't like that donator, you shouldn't have donated to the 3D printing resin charity then should you? Helping people who want 3D resin to get 3D resin whenever they need it. For the Toyota Century community? That's all I'm saying. For the Blackmagic stack camera community, yeah? My point would just be, I understand the, I understand that ultimately, you know, in an ideal world, businesses, corporations, and people all pay their tax.

Let's agree on that, take that as read. That's obviously not happening, right? There's nothing you or I can do about that. So when I decide to round up, and they don't call me Luke Roundup more for nothing, I always round up. Right? Even if it's like three quid and a penny, are you rounding up 99 pence?

I am. That's wild. You are. Wow. Because if that money's going to a good cause, then I'd rather my money went to a good cause in some way than not go to a good cause at all. And then the tax affairs of the corporation, I think it's bullshit what half of them do, but realistically at least someone gets them out to some good people that need it and I

think that's the right thing to do overall, the balance of probabilities, I think that's the right thing to do. Well I got me direct debits, but I'm not, I just always sort of think that it's a bit of a, but if it's a bit of a... Not all of them, I don't want to wear all of them, just the charity ones. It's a bit of an imposition for... I think it's just a bit of a pistic. Because they're not doing it. They're doing it for one reason and one reason alone.

To cheat on their... not cheat. Let's make that very clear, that's not what I'm saying. But to basically write off some of their tax. And if they still want their pound of flesh, then then come and get it because I'm skinned. You're not going to get a red fucking scent off me. God damn it. If you and I went to McDonald's and I bought you, what should McDonald's order again? Usually, actually I've changed it. Actually you taught me around to a quarter pounder with cheese. A quarter pounder with cheese and fries and a chocolate milkshake.

Fine, so if I'm buying you that, I'm getting myself the old quarter pounder with cheese, a quarter pounder with cheese and fries and a chocolate milkshake. Fine, so I'm buying you that, I'm getting myself the old quarter pounder cheese meal, probably a large Sprite, right? Lovely. And we're doing what we normally do where you and I fight over who gets to pay for it because we're both quite generous, we both want to pay for things, and I say to you, alright, I'll pay, but you've got to let me round up up or you can choose whether to round up or not. What are you going for? Well obviously I'm going to choose to take the gift of me voting with my wallet.

I'm going to take the opportunity aren't I? I'm going to say I'll do it and I'll choose whether to round up and I'm not rounding up. Sorry McDonald's foundation. Sorry mate. Providing accommodation for the families of children in long term hospital care. Well when you say it like that it sounds bad. The money's gonna be greasy. The money's gonna stink of potatoes, isn't it?

I think it's the right thing to do. Our listeners will have their own opinion and if I could get around to social media in a poll in Taylor's absence, I would find out but I'd probably not want to do that, to be honest. I just wish they would be a bit more honest and sort of go, we're a faceless company, we don't really care. If we could get away with shooting a penguin in the fist if we made a quid we do it because our shareholders demand it and the city demands it but But in this case, I'm you give me a pound and I'm gonna be able to claim ten pence of that back on my tax

It's I don't know. I just think it's I just think we should be honest. That's all I wish to be honest about what the reasons why in which they're getting involved in this sort of thing. But they're not gonna say that, are they? Round up and win safe some money on tax, do us a solid cheers. They're not gonna say that, are they? But sometimes the man or woman will lean over when before it says do you wanna round up,

sometimes they'll go and press the red button to cancel that bit. I know, I don't like that. That happened to me in a super drug yesterday. What is the, I did happen to be in a super drugug the other day. What is the... what is the... I happened to be in a superdrug yesterday as well! Oh my god! What was I buying? I was buying some shaving foam that turned out to be shaving gel. Can you even buy shaving foam? Everything's fucking shaving gel now.

I haven't been shaving for ten plus years, I couldn't tell you. Anyway, Peter... I want to make a big cream pie. Yeah. On someone's face yeah I would like to be the arbitrary controller whether I round up or not is what I wanted to say to the super I didn't say anything in fact I've had a bit of a week keen-eared listeners will know that on Thursday we promise an email special here we will get to that but I've had a bit of an odd week when it comes to them

we won't look sad an odd week we going to get 15 minutes out of that. Yeah, hopefully. And we'll see you on Thursday. Yeah, no, I've got this, I had a uncharacteristically annoying situation where I didn't actually say something when I should have. And I was quite annoyed myself for a while. I'll tell you what happened, right? I cycled back through Brockwell Park, which is in between Toles Hill, Hearn Hill and Brixton. And I always cut through there. And it's absolutely clear,

and you can go and check this if you want, I cycled back through there and on every entrance to the park, it says clearly, this path is to be shared by cyclists and pedestrians, right? Okay, right, yeah. It also says, your dog must be uncontrolled and I lead at all times, right? Right, okay. People don't do that, we know they don't do that, fine, I get it, I don't fucking care, that's fine. But anyway, for some reason, every single,

I think, Monday and Wednesday when I cycle back through the park, there's a group of, I'm going to say, painfully middle-class women, their wet wipe husbands, and their kids of about between five and eight years old, right? Right, yeah. I guess they might just come out of school and they all congregate together. And there's literally probably 50 families always there at the same time doing the same thing. So when I cycled back about three, they're normally there. What are they doing?

I just hang out. Mate, honestly, I've got no fucking idea. Stealing bikes. What's going on? I asked the Wi-Fi if I have access to, she was like, oh, they must have some after school club or something It's not a club trying to infiltrate. Can you can you infiltrate this group? Please and find out what the hell is going on

I should do I should go undercover but I've got no chance of going to cover now because I've had a couple of set twos and I'm gonna tell you about right, but the first one was I'm cycling through and obviously because I'm not a psychopath. I see that there's kids running around So I'm very one the park is gigantic, but for some reason they're all on the path, right? And you know as well as I do, the line bike isn't great off-road.

It needs to still on a path. Yeah. So, I slow down, I slow down like, to a very, very slow speed to get through them. And then a couple of weeks ago, this family, like I say, middle-class mum, like wet wipe dad in Lycra, who doesn't say anything to anyone,

and this little girl, she's about eight, and they've got a dog, and this dog's tearing around like a maniac, right? I get that it's a dog, I'm not fucking against dogs, I'm an anti-dog, right? But it runs in front of the bike, right. And they're just watching it. They're just watching it. Right. And better than that, I'm not the only person cycling in this park. I'm going back and forth and stuff.

And she, and the woman said to me, Oh, be careful of the dog. And I was like, yeah, all right. I will be careful of the dog in that, but this is a cycle path and your dog's supposed to be the lead. I didn't say any of this stuff. I just let it go. No, no dear. I carried on. No joke, the very same family, this is about two weeks ago, the very same family yesterday when I was cycling back from the office, the girl kicked a ball under my bike wheel. You're on a hidden camera!

I had to skid to stay on the bike, right? And then I was like, I obviously rolled my eyes and was like, said something under my breath and the woman, the mum was like, well she's only a child. And I was like, yeah I'm obviously not angry at the child, am I? I'm angry at you, you stupid fucking idiot. But I didn't say that either, I just carried on cycling. And I wonder what the third one's gonna be. Sounds like you wet-wiped hard that night. You wet wiped hard.

I felt a bit like her husband. I wet wiped. Right. I mean I like that you've kind of... What would you have done? I've done the exact same thing but my Esprit de Scalière would have taken place much later than yours because you're quite, you know, I let my emotions would take over. I wouldn't be able to explain precisely what was wrong. Yeah, you got flustered. Yeah, I'd get flustered. I'd probably need to calm down, jump in some leaves maybe. Sorry, I'm really stressed out right now. I'm just going to jump in some leaves. Then I'm going

to tell you precisely what went wrong here. Do another part of it, destroy your cereals. And I'm not going to start karate kicking the kids. I'm not. It's not happening. But there's just a real culture where I live, which is like a gentrified area, of parents just don't discipline. I don't mean discipline hasn't been horrible to the kids.

I mean they just don't tell their kids anything. I've been in the pub before having lunch with the wife I've got access to and there'd be like a four-year-old just kicking the table we're eating lunch at and the parents are just sitting there. It's wild to me. Ah yeah, I mean, I think kids do whatever the kids want to do in it. It's not the kids fault. But you could move the table away, you could move the kid away from the table, you could explain that's not a good idea. All those things. Any of those are fine. I'll take any of those.

Get your phone out, put the wiggles on. That's your answer to everything. Just get the phone out. Put rather noisy lion on. That's what I do to you in a meeting. Stop you wondering in the liveroo. You just give me a carry bag full of leaves. Go on. Crack on with them. Alright Pete we've got to go for a break. Yeah we've got to go for a break. This was an email special. We'll do emails after the break, I promise you that. Oh god. It's the Luke and Pete Show. Emails, we're doing them. See, we're not liars. Hello at lukeandpeachshow.com if you'd like to get in touch. Luke, kick us off mate, will you? For crying out loud. Yeah, this one's from James. Hello to you James. He says, following up on the episode of Monday the 16th, so would it be last week, Luke described, but James, these are very much your words, not mine,

and I'm going to clarify this. He says, Luke described his best way to steal a bottle of alcohol from the supermarket. I did not say that. It sounds like you did. It sounds like this is the Jolly Rogers cookbook for shoplifting. Yeah. I said, if you were going to do it, you would need to be quite presentable, cut the kind of figure that no one was suspect of stealing anything and just walk out confidently. That's the same thing. It sounds like the J. Simpson's book about where he said that this is what I would have done if I didn't.

Yeah, kind of. Yeah, I'm not necessarily that happy about being associated with that, but I do take the point. I remember being at the British Podcast Awards once before we boycotted it and I publicly said it was shit and I just confidently strolled into the VIP bit and no one stopped me right okay because I because I believe that I should be there yeah I mean I've got I've not got that whole I accidentally shopped with some garlic last week didn't mean to do that but I'll do it how that? I've got a taste of it. I put it in my pocket because I had loads of things on.

I don't think you should be putting stuff in your pocket in a shop for a shop. I know, I'm on camera doing that now. Trying to steal a little pot of pre-cut garlic. Terrible. That's lazy. Isn't it actually called lazy garlic? It is called lazy garlic? It's not the brand name. It is called lazy garlic. But why just... we've had this argument before about pre-chopped garlic. It's just so much easier. I've got a garlic crusher, just that one. Just do that. Crush it.

Just do that with one hand. But then your hand stings the garlic, doesn't it? Yeah, my grandad, I'll tell you, my grandad used to crack walnuts in his bicep at Christmas. Ha ha ha ha ha. That's great. Popeye. Yeah, very Popeye-esque, very big Popeye energy. Anyway, James says, when Luke said this, it reminded me of the time a girlfriend and I have access to and I temporarily stole some chicken goujons and curly fries from the supermarket. I can confirm his method is 100% correct. A few years ago, we were walking around the shop picking up bits for tea and just having a general conversation. And we got so distracted

by whatever we were talking about, we accidentally just walked straight out of the shop, goujons and fries in hand, got into the car and drove home. It was not until we got home that I said, I don't remember paying for these, do you? My girlfriend couldn't believe it and was horrified. A genuine accident which resulted in a delicious free meal or so I thought she rang him up to confess. I went back to the shop the next day to pay six pounds to put it right. It's hardly, who is it, the man and the woman who did the crimes. Oh Bonnie and Clyde. Bonnie and Clyde, it's hardly Bonnie and Clyde is it if you're going back and sort of going

sorry about it, it's six quid, unbelievable. Yes, I would also say that the general, I think the rule or the law even is that it can't be, it can't be rectified that late, it's done. What's done is done. Like I think the law says that if you, but this is the thing, back in the day when you used to pay for things in cash,

I remember and I worked in the shop, if you... But this is the thing, back in the day, when you used to pay for things in cash, I remember, and I worked in the shop, if you gave out the wrong change, they left the building. You can't rectify it. Was that one of those kind of apocryphal tales that hasn't been tested in the law? Yeah, I'm sure, but like, I would, it's one of those things where I think,

it's not even like, isn't like stealing, it's the depriving of someone, someone have access of their own product or something like that. It's something very weird. So like, are you still depriving that person of their product if you're coming back with the product? I don't know. I would say that when it comes to the change, that it would be that as soon as you left the premises, they don't know what you've been doing. So they can't say that you might just put the money in your pocket or something. You have to mention it before you leave.

Anyway, thanks for that email, James. And thanks, I mean, you must be on one level very proud you've got such an honest girlfriend. Yep, next email, Aidan, dearly looped the Pete's, long time listener, first time emailer. I was listening to Sunday's episode when the ongoing chat about who was the tallest listener was brought up again. I want to throw my hat in the ring as my height has been measured officially and is listed

publicly on my college water polo team's roster. I'm from America. We've got Adrian. He looks like he could carry an auto too. He could. Aidan, not Adrian. Oh, sorry, Aidan. And we Aiden not Adrian. Oh sorry Aiden and we won't expose Adrian. Aiden! We can't, can't get his name right. Gigantic Aiden is height is six, six foot six. If he was

working for the WWE at any point that would at least be seven foot two. That would be his build height. What would a tall, I guess yeah it's probably, would a a goalkeeper. That would be his build height. What would a tall, I guess, yeah, it's probably... Would a tall goalkeeper really matter in water polo? Bearing in mind you could swim. It doesn't matter how tall you are, you could swim. Am I right in saying you can't put your feet on the floor on water polo? You've got to tread water the whole time. Oh, I don't know. That would be exhausting, wouldn't it?

I think that's why they're so fit, yeah. People bounce around though, don't know that would be exhausting wouldn't it? I think that's why they're so fit Yeah, people bounce around though Don't they have seen people sort of bounce and throw and bounce and throw and bounce now I think they're doing it off their own steamer. I don't think they're doing it off the off the deck Are the goalkeepers do the goalkeepers have to be particularly tall because it is the deep end Because they're at the end Pete how many times you want me to say this I don't think they can touch the floor All right. Well, I'm thinking they can touch the defense. Pete, I don't know how many times you want me to say this, I don't think they can touch the floor. All right, well I'm thinking they can touch the floor because you see them banks around. All right, so I think once again I'm going to be proved right, but it's going to be proved right

at like three o'clock next Thursday and I'll be annoyed that it's not featured on the show. You won't be because you will have got one over on me so well done you. Thank you to Aidan Adrian, he actually admits it he's probably not the tallest but I have been looking for an excuse to send in my first email for a while. Well I hope you're enjoying the show and I hope you're enjoying the show with your big bloody headphones on. Do you know that where he's from, Livermore, California, according to his thing, I'm pretty sure that's where the Rolling Stones played, that festival that went mad wrong, because they had the Hells Angels doing the security, Altamont. I'm pretty sure that's there.

How interesting. Let us know, Aidan, if you know that. That'd be good. It's kind of vineyard country, isn't it, I guess? But yeah, he's 18 as well. That's wonderful that we're impressing upon 18-year-old water polo players. Maybe we'll get a following in the post-teen, young polo playing community, and that's where we'll build our millions. It seems unlikely, but we can only hope. What about this from Chris?

He says, hi Luke and Pete. Following a recent battery submission slash toenail tangent, I don't have a battery to share, but I do have a dodgy toenail. So a while back, one of our listeners sent a battery in for the submission and in the background of the photo was frankly a horrendous looking toenail. It looked like Popeye to get the give Popeye

that I mentioned on this show. Chris is following up on that. He says, to give you an idea of my toenail's villain arc, when I was a teenager, I had quite a bad ingrown nail which became infected. At this point, it did get stood on like the previous submission and said, I had the size of it cut out and removed

and with a chemical rubbed on to stop the nail growing back in these areas. Lo and behold it grows back pretty quickly and years later becomes ingrown again. I had the same procedure performed but this time the whole nail was removed. I was told that it wouldn't grow back and would just become hardened skin. Lo and behold I now have a disgusting toenail, Like the one I've attached. Image. Every now and then it will fall off with a small nail already underneath. It doesn't really bother me.

Other than the pelters I get from the partner I have access to and my daughter about how disgusting it is. Does Pete have any suggestions about how to fix this? Keep up the good work, Chris. I mean, to me it sounds like the toenail is like some version of Japanese knotweed. Yeah, it does feel like that, doesn't it? Yeah, I mean, it sounds like everybody will eventually get one because it's just the thing to have, one would suggest.

I mean, ugh. It looks bad, doesn't it? It looks like, you know, like those sort of brown, sort of weather-beaten posts you see at the beach that separate different sections of sand. It looks like one's been kind of like a charmer. It massively looks like that. It's landed in a sandy toe.

Is it really good? Sean Conner! Is it really good? Sean Conner has got in touch. Hello from White Rock, British Columbia. Great email locations today. I'm loving it. Today I was out picking a few things for dinner and came across the British section of my local Safeway. This is relatively new, so I it might, thought maybe you could let me know what you think and if there's anything I should be putting in the cart next time we do have our own Canadian versions of baked beans and

chocolate bars but I guess these are imports from the UK. Prices are Canadian dollars and you can add 12% combined provincial and federal tax. Love the show Sean Connor you don't pay for that if you shoplift. I mean there's a fine collection of British snacks. There's things like your normal sort of Milky Bars, Yorkies. They're not for women. Chocolate, Flakes and that. Then there's some weird mums. Tonnage Caramel Wafers as well there mate. Tonnage Caramel Wafers, that drew my eye as well.

Treacle Toffee is that at the top as well, like a little kind of um top left. Yeah. Treacle Toffee in there, Fruit Pastels. That is a bit of me but it's, I would say that there's, and also like, um, we're very, um, we're very British, um, so that the, um, sort of old, is it Old Jamaica, um, Ginger Ale, that would probably be in the World Foods Isle in our safe way Adam. So that's how British that is even though obviously we obviously drink quite a lot of it. Pickle Lily, Branson Pickle Lily, get involved with the pickle lily. If you've never muddied your boots with pickle lily, lovely bright yellow, you know, Minion yellow pickle lily sauce, get involved.

Yeah, it's like a mustard base sauce with a lot of chopped vegetables in it, isn't it? Yeah, very pickled vegetables. Seems like curry sauce is involved somewhere, but probably isn't. Just for the acrid yellow, kind of sulfuric yellow that you get from it. It's lovely stuff. So a fine collection. Any of those products we'd be very happy with. I don't know what next to the Burt's lightly sea-salted crisps we've got some Ante's.

Looks like a kind of toffee pudding or something. That's shortbread mate. Sorry, two away from that. The Ante's. Oh yeah, that's a syrup pudding isn't it? Is that a syrup pudding? I wouldn't touch that to be honest. The top three most Donaldson things in this photo are without question the pot noodle,

the treacle toffee and I would say probably the Turkish delight. I bet that's a bit of you innit? You know what, yeah alright, treacle toffee, Turkish delight, the tablet that's a bit of you, innit? You know what? Yeah, alright. Er, Trickel Toffee, Turkish Delight, the tablet that's next door, presumably that's the, er, the old, er... Pot noodle though, you love a pot noodle. Peppermint... Pot no... If you, if you... Going from pot noodle, going from like a proper like Asian kind of cup noodle,

to a pot noodle, you do sort of go, oh god, we were getting this so wrong for like 25 years, and then we started getting the Asian ones, and you're like, oh yeah, that's how it's supposed to taste like I don't know I don't know what pot noodle we're getting away with with their adverse. No but when you're going home from somewhere you're walking back from the station or whatever and the only thing that's open is a convenience store and you want something to eat I'm pretty sure you're going for a pot noodle. No I'm going for little chicken

tikka bites that you see at the they're always in the bottom of the off-licence fridge Frigerators next to like some Well, no not even that like off-brand sort of onion bargy flavored chicken bites It looked like they've been there for months and they look like they'll be there for years and years to come You used to get those all the time in London corner shops used to get samosas as well. They don't really do them as much now Yeah, yeah, it's's true it's true. Oh lordy delicious delicious all right. Alright Peter that's it from us I think. Squeeze one quick one in or do you want to? Alright let's squeeze one more in why not? Have we got a really short one? Yeah Andy from Wisconsin. This

was an email special sorry. Yeah okay. Andy from Wisconsin Peter I'm gonna do that one. He says hi guys Andy here I'm emailing in again after submitting a couple of batteries into the Battery Daddy last week. During the readout, it was mentioned that I compared rural Wisconsin as similar to Romford Market. I must correct this fallacy. I simply meant the fair itself was akin to a marketplace. Crappy batteries, suspiciously discounted perfumes and Trump branded tat as far as the eye can see. I'm a UK expat living in Wisconsin and I can confirm it's

a wonderful place. It's the beer and cheese capital of the US. Every summer it's home to the world's largest music festival, Summerfest. The people are the nicest people you'll meet anywhere and there's abundance of art, culture and nightlife everywhere. I don't know what prompted me to follow up on last week's email so resolutely, but I felt I got an unfair representation on the last app. P.S. however, the winters are some of the worst days you'll ever have in your life.

Negative 10 degree temperatures and five feet of snow for three months. Oh dear, oh my god. That sounds amazing to be fair. It's absolutely wild, yeah. At some places. Much to hear from Andy though, right? Yeah, like, once you start to get telly

and start to see other parts of the world you do sort of go, we could live somewhere else, couldn't we? We could actually live somewhere else. I'm trying to get the WiFi I have access to to agree to at least try to live in Scandinavia for a bit, but she's not having it. Right, okay, just for a bit, yeah.

I just think it'd be interesting. You'd have to do the summer though wouldn't you I mean I think I think the boy would absolutely love it they look after their people well there it's just a nice healthy lifestyle I think this country's a whole now I just think it would tick with the boxers. You sound like the lads in my Toyota Century WhatsApp group. Right let's get out of here. No knife crime on this podcast. We'll be back on Thursday for batteries and all kinds of stuff. Hello Luke and Pete Shaw if you found a battery in the shaft of a toy, a plaything, a trifle and you can also get in touch via Twitter if you fancy as well. We keep our eyes and ears open for that sort of care. Say goodbye Lukey Moore.

See you later. See you later. See you later, and it's goodbye from me as well. Ta ta. ["The Luke and Pete Show Theme Song"] The Luke and Pete Show is a stack production and part of the A-Cast creator network.