The Luke and Pete Show - Motorway Scooters and First-Person Shooters

Episode Date: May 13, 2021

On today’s show, Pete begins preparing for his long-awaited driving test, while Luke shares news about a potential inbound rocket heading for the studio...Elsewhere, over in our newly established ��battery corner’, A NEW PLAYER ENTERS THE GAME and triggers some intense chat about ex girlfriends, before we receive some behind-the-scenes Come Dine With Me updates from a man named Disco John.GET INVOLVED! Drop us an email over at [e-mail] or give us a message on our Twitter and Instagram pages at @lukeandpeteshow. We love hearing all of your nonsense!Don't forget to leave us a review over on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. 5 stars will do. Cheers!Produced by Natalie Wilson Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

it's a luca peach it is a thursday luke i'm gonna let people through this fucking curtain and tell them that we recorded this show a couple of days earlier than we usually would and um currently we are very worried about a piece of space trash hurtling towards earth right now are the us gonna shoot this piece of chinese space trash out of the air with the laser jewish or otherwise what are they gonna do how is it it's gonna crash it as the the atlantic or the pacific or something it's all very exciting luke yeah so i think apparently um let's just get let's just get straight into it mate are we doing all right i'm almost fine till i heard this cool um i'm doing all right yeah people know what to expect from us by now.

So there's a piece of Chinese space trash, as you would say. I mean, it's a bit disrespectful calling it trash. I think it was at one point a space station. Yeah. That's coming back into the Earth's atmosphere and is expected to drop onto the Earth at some point. And to me, reading that article about it i thought there should be more contingency for this because they say stuff like oh um anything under a certain size kind of

burns up and there's nothing to worry about and then they can control the bigger stuff i think but this one like this article was incredible because it had quotes from people like, for example, Jonathan McDowell, astrophysicist at the Astrophysics Centre at Harvard University. What do you think he said? It's bad. He said, it's potentially not good. I want more detail.

Suboptimal. I'm going to need more detail. I want figures. I want facts. I want an Al from Quantum Leap percentage, please, whether it's going to drop a meowth. And then the article goes on to say, the most likely outcome is it will fall into the sea

as the ocean covers 71% of the planet. It's not a contingency. It's not enough. If I said to you, you've got a 29% chance of having a disaster today, which could involve deaths that's too high it's fucking too high

a percentage just keep fire and just have little boosters on it and boost it out to I don't know Uranus oh very good

I don't know what to expect I hope that I hope that it doesn't apparently it's currently it's currently trajectoried to land I think in the sea off the coast of the...

Oh, no, sorry. Last time it happened, a load of stuff smashed into, mostly into the sea, but some of it smashed into parts of buildings in the Ivory Coast. Yeah, not great, is it? It's always like, why is it always like... It's never, yeah, it's never New York.

Oh. Well, because it would have been shot out of the sky a long time ago. We probably know about it. Yeah. Are you saying that you want it to land on New York? No, I'm not saying I want it to land on New York. It's never like... All right, I've chosen a terrible choice for that one.

Yeah. Los Angeles. Why? What? Why Los Angeles? The traffic's terrible. They could do with a shake-up. That's going to make traffic worse, isn't it?

They'll have to cordon it off. They'll have to close roads, won't they? Fine. No one ever says, I'll tell you what we have to cordon it off. They'll have to close roads, won't they? All right, fine. No one ever says, I'll tell you what we need to sort this traffic out, some space debris smashing into us. Space shit.

Let's sort it out. It's just admin. It's going to make it worse. I wonder whether people have spent enough time thinking about what they're going to do with space trash, basically. Because apparently things more than 10 tonnes should not allow to be fallen out of the sky onto the Earth. And that seems

quite high to me. 10 tonnes is a lot. So anyway, I mean, fuck, that's what's going to happen. By the time this comes out, we might all be hit on the head with it. Maybe it landed, maybe it might land on those warring Jersey fishermen. Another very relevant story for when we recorded this.

That is an interesting story, though. It is, yeah. Proper old-school brinkmanship, isn't it? It gave me quite a lot of nostalgia. Yeah. It's like, it's almost as if, right, when the conservatives get in, big problems happen every time.

Do you reckon they get blamed for it or not? No, they don't get it. They're the absolute formica Teflon straight off. Who did you vote for in the old election? Binhead, of course. Camping face, did you? Camping face, yeah, of course. Did you really?

No. Okay, you don't want to tell me. It's not important. Tory. What? Of course the Tory. But I just point at some people and you just nod when I get to it. That YouTuber.

Did you? That YouTuber. Well, one of the YouTubers has been on Jack's show. Really lovely fellow, Max. I reckon if Jack ran, he'd Jack. Jack Met. I haven't the channel.

I will sort out this fishing problem. Amazing. I thought it was a really interesting story. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't need to know, really.

I'm just enjoying the Daily Mail front covers of like, these fucking, fucking frogs on the run bollocks. You know, all that shit. Don't call to know, really. I'm just enjoying the daily front covers of like, these fucking frogs on the run bollocks, you know? Don't call them frogs. That's what they would say. It sounds like you're saying it. It doesn't, because I'm doing this voice.

Plausible deniability. Why haven't frogs got breasts? They probably have. They're amphibians. Completely different kettle of fish. I'm going to fucking get one and draw little titties on them. Frog's legs? Well, why not draw the breast?

What are you in for? Why don't you draw? What are you in for? Animal cruelty. Oh, that's horrible. What have you done? I drew a load of, I got a Sharpie. Yeah.

I drew a load of breasts on frogs. Yeah. The best ever. They were really emasculated. The best ever deal with it meme gif was the poisonous lizard coming out the frog's mouth and the frog dying oh don't look like that the frog

ate the lizard and you thought that was the end of it that's the end of the story all of a sudden the frog dies and the lizard just casually crawls out

the frog's mouth sunglasses down deal with it bifter is it better crab with a knife crab with a knife versus

death lizard. Crab, well, gecko with the little drawing pin. You mess with gecko, you get the pecko. Do you remember that one? That's a great meme. The frog that people said was nailed to the park bench. But it wasn't. No, I don't think it was.

Why do people make stuff up like that? I just think they just want to spoil people's fun. They're lonely. Yeah. Yes, it is. Remember going back a long, long time and there was

the bonsai cats myth? Oh, yeah. You put the cats in the square jar and they become square or something. Very, very strange. But seriously,

you mess with Gecko, you get a pecko. I need to talk to you about your driving test. Oh, no. Because it was your birthday last week, as we discussed. It was, yeah. And I noticed

in the diary, in the work diary that we share... Did I put it in there? Well, this is the thing. People who listen to this show regularly will not be surprised to hear that you raged against the dying of the light when it came to using a work calendar. But now you finally use it. I'm very organised. You put a lot of detail in there.

I would probably just put Luke unavailable, but you've put Pete driving test. Have I? I think I changed it after. Yeah, it is. Oh, turns out. Yes, I did do that at some point. Yeah, I like the work calendar,

but I don't, the thing is, I don't put my, I don't get specific about meetings and stuff. I just put Pete busy. And I fear that make me look a little more work shy than most. I think put Pete busy. And I fear that may make me look a little more work shy than most. I think it looks like you're masturbating.

I mean, I'm doing that as well, obviously. Tell me about your driving test. I'm not allowed to masturbate. Are you ready? No! God, no. You know what? I'm all right at it.

And it's an automatic and it's a piece of piss. The only thing is other road users and St Albans. I'm doing my test and it's an automatic and it's a piece of piss the only thing is other road users in St Albans I'm doing my test in St Albans the buses

they just do what they want the other car drivers they do what they want roundabouts who needs them it just seems to be very it's a very stressful thing

but my driving instructor he's not used his little brick for a few weeks just to wear a mask yeah and that's the thing under the spectacles it kind of gets dislodged sometimes and that's the thing. Under the spectacles, it kind of gets dislodged sometimes and you don't want to

and you try and adjust it. You can't be taking your hands off the wheel. That's terrible. Do your glasses steam up when you're driving? Yeah, well, no, a little bit but it's just a bit uncomfortable. It's uncomfortable doing everything with a mask. It's rather upsetting but I understand why you need to do it.

So you're only going to do it for an automatic car? Yeah. Why? It's easier. You've only ever got to own your own car, aren't you?

And rent your own car. So the car you've already bought. And all cars in the future will be electric and automatic anyway, aren't they? True, actually. So,

but driving, I didn't realise, it's fucking exhausting. The concentration makes you tired. I mean, because I've never done it before, I'm a little more like, oh, am I in a residential area? Is it 30 or 20? And I'm just constantly just, and by the end of it,

I'm absolutely rinsed. I didn't realise how stressful it was. But yeah, I like my driving instructor, Alam. I just love his stories as a young man moving to London, as a young Bangladeshi bloke. It was just like a fascinating... Is he a good instructor? Yeah, he's good.

When's he telling you those stories? When you're driving? Yeah. That's bad. He used to take Mondays off, Monday nights off, so he could watch the Not The Nine O'Clock News. That's not what you'd think to be into, isn't it? Yeah, it's a bit random.

To take time off to do it. But should he really be telling you all these stories while you're supposed to be driving? Yeah, well, we're chill now. I'm like, I'm almost the finished product. But I just know for a fact I'll get in the... The only advice he ever says is, you can do that after you've passed,

but don't do it now. Don't do it for your test. I'm worried about that. Is he going to sit in the back of the car for your test? Because they do that now, apparently. Do they? What, the instructor? How the instructor sits behind us, right?

So my friend passed her test quite recently. She's my age. Yeah. Our age. Because you do it in their car, don't you? Yes, and she said... He's just looking after the merchandise. No, but when I passed my test

your driving instructor sat there waiting for you but apparently now they can sit in the back would you want that would you want

Alam telling you stories while you're doing it no I didn't want yeah that would stress me out it would feel like I was on like a

boys holiday come on lads we're going to finally oh let's go to the park so I remember when I passed my driving test

the driving test examiner was sick right I didn't want to cancel like sick as in like a badass like smoking doobs

I think he went on to pass away sadly cool I just made that up that quickly pull the pass off just get in the car with you no this is absolutely true so what happened was

they didn't want to cancel the tests so I got a driving test examiner who I think was a motorbike test guy so he came and sat in the passenger seat

he's like whoa four wheels no joke right this is like two motorbikes worth no joke he had full levers on and the helmet

with the thing up what and he squeezed his way into the passenger seat with this clipboard. What? And he passed me. And I've never really said anything for a while because I didn't want people to think it wasn't legit.

But it was in 1999, so I've probably got away with it now. That's insane. Yeah, so I got a real touch. What was his deal about? I don't know, I just got a real touch. A man who had no peripheral vision at all because he's got a helmet on. He thought if he crashed, it's fine, I'm wearing a helmet. Did you get into a rally car? It sounds like you were in a rally car. He thought if he crashed, it's fine, I'm wearing a helmet. Did you get into a rally car?

Sounds like you were in a rally car. He kept screaming, left, left, left. Left, left, left, hard left. Yeah. Oh, wow. Funny. So do you still have to do the old emergency stop and reverse around the corner and that kind of stuff?

I think I've done some reversing around the corner. The thing about Alam, and I presume it's with every instructor these days, they prepare you to pass the test rather than to do the thing you're supposed to do. So, like, I can vibe my way into a parking spot. I can vibe my way into a parallel park. But he literally goes, go there, turn the wheel three times this way or two times, one time, yeah, and it gets in the position.

All right, that works, Alam, but I want to vibe it out. Yeah. I want to vibe it. I want to enjoy my enjoy my driving mate i'm more of a jazz driver but you know um the one thing i found weird when i passed my test is that they don't um let you drive a motorways until you've passed and that was quite terrifying coming onto a motorway why did they do that statistically i think it's the safest part of the road yeah i guess everyone's going in the same direction but um getting onto a motorway is I think it's the safest part of the road. Yeah. I guess because everyone's going in the same direction. But getting onto a motorway is terrifying when you've just passed.

And you're like... Do you think you'll bother doing it? Is someone letting me on? I did. I did it. I accidentally got on the M1 on my scooter on the way to my driving lesson. I was like... Trying to get a sense. I was like, I don't really know where I'm going.

And I was like, that's a big... Oh, that's the M1. I cannot get into that. Did you go back down the slipway road? I went, I was on the roundabout about to get on the M1.

I was like, I'm fairly certain. But the problem with like motorways is you really can't do UEs. I mean, they've made that very clear by design.

But yeah, I managed to get off earlier rather than later. Well, it depends what part of the world you're in because I think sometimes they, I mean,

some parts of the world the laws of the road are quite than later. Well, it depends what part of the world you're in because I think sometimes they, I mean, some parts of the world the laws of the road are quite just guidelines. Yeah, they're just a serving suggestion aren't they? Yeah. I remember being in Naples

and the cab driver, you might have been in my cab, drove the wrong way down the road on the wrong side of the road for, I'm going to say about 200 metres.

One way down and one way straight. Yeah, it was pretty terrifying. And then I was also in, as I told you, I was in Turkey once, Mimi and I, and a taxi took us into town.

He was playing Candy Crush the whole time, right? He drove down a cycle track because there was traffic and then he got out of the car while the meter was running and had a fist fight with a coach driver.

I like it. It was full on. He's just, look, he's amped up with all that Candy Crush. The problem was, I was getting fuming in a really British way about the it. It was full on. He's just, look, he's amped up with all that candy crush. The problem was, I was getting fuming in a really British way

about the meter. I was like, pause the meter to have a fight. If you want to fight, have it. If that's what you want to do, do it.

I went to Istanbul once and I think I took three taxis, all of which I paid twice. Like, easily. It's just like, it's just, oh, oh,

me, me, me, me, it's gone down. I was like, has it, mate? Has it?

Because we know what you're doing. Should I be paying him to have the fight? Answer me that. I shouldn't be, should I? No, no. If he wants to have it, he should be having it on his own time. Yeah, I completely agree. Anyway, let's go and have a quick break.

Let's do that. We'll have a quick break. And then when we come back, I've got a couple more emails. But before we do that, I need to do some battery brands because that's what happens on a Thursday. So stick around. We'll be back after these very important messages.

Batteries. Luke, Pete, we've got the lot. Luke Moore is in Battery Corner. I'm in Battery Corner. It's like that thing you get in the supermarket where people put their disused batteries in. Yeah. They never empty those. No.

It's just always overflowing with batteries. What do they do with them? They just pour them down the sewer. Just pour them down a grate. Do you reckon they put them together to make

one big battery? There's a bit of juice left in all of them. I don't know. One big battery left. And Elon Musk takes them for Tesla. He does, yeah.

He just pours them in the gas tank. A lot of people don't realise that, do they? That's how you actually charge a Tesla. You just pour all the

batteries in the side, yeah. Yeah, it works. You did tell me once, I think this was a lie, but you did tell me, you just pour all the batteries in the side, yeah. Yeah, it works. You did tell me once, I think this was a lie, but you did tell me that you put up the

carpet in an electric car and it's just a load of batteries underneath. Yeah, there's like 70,000 batteries in each individual cell.

That seems like bollocks. Mate, trust me, believe. The electric revolution starts here. No point having a

big battery because if it breaks, your car's fucked. If you have loads of different cells, if a couple of them break, you're fine. True.

It's a fair point. All right, here we go then. Battery brands. It's a Thursday, so we see if we can get some new players to enter the game. Pete, I'm going to put them to you. You can judge.

Someone pointed out on Twitter that it wasn't the most robust of processes because I said that all I do is ask Pete and if he can remember them, they don't go in. Yeah, that person can get fucked because I have a titanium memory. Yeah, that person can get fucked because I have a titanium memory. Yeah, no memories can get in.

The first one is from Fox Danger on Twitter. Fox Danger, good name. It's Kendall, as in the place Kendall in the Lake District. Oh, I saw that and I thought Fox Danger was the battery. Which would have been great. Oh, mate.

I've never seen this, Kendall, before. Don't eat them. It's not a mint cake. No. You don't want zinc or magnesium in your mouth. They've branched out from mint cakes to batteries. Is it a new player? Yes, I think it is.

I think so, too. Well done, Fox. It's a new player entering the game. Chris Days has been in touch saying, what about... He said, I woke up early. I found a game of cricket on TV to watch. One of the main sponsors is Osaka Batteries.

Nice. And rather than saying, is this a new player to enter the game? He says, is this an addition to your battery brands? Get it in the list. Yeah, Osaka Batteries. Lovely part of Japan. It's not technically a battery he's presenting.

It's the existence of a battery. So I guess maybe we'll let him in. We'll let him in. And Matt Drage has emailed him with three new battery brands. First of all, Ruido and Gritty definitely aren't new players. We've seen them before loads of times. And the middle one is Super X, as in Super E-X, as in, like, you had a partner who went on

to do really amazing things after you broke up, and they were your Super X. Oh, right. Is that right? So, OK to do really amazing things after you broke up, and they were your super ex. Oh, right. Is that right? Okay, someone has achieved something after you. My ex is moving to Bermuda. All right. That's a big one, isn't it?

That's a big move. Is that because of the suits the Majesty's got on Zola and UP, or not? What happened? What happened? I don't know. She's moving to Bermuda. I thought, that's interesting.

Hard to dress that one up as a sideways move with your partner. Not LS. Not LS. Oh, really? Crazy, huh? She's moved to Bermuda. I thought, that's interesting. Hard to dress that one up as a sideways move with your new partner. Is it? Not LS. Not LS. Oh, really? Crazy, huh? Yeah, that is crazy. Fair enough.

Not really a new partner. They've been together for a long time. Yeah. They've got a kid and everything. I know. Yeah, all right. Fair enough. I just don't think the first way to describe her

should be your ex. She's done other stuff. Fine, okay. But I don't think it really... I'm just saying it's interesting. How do you congratulate someone about moving halfway around the world? Good luck.

Good luck, that's what I said. Yeah, send around a Monopoly. Something from home. Remind you of home, yeah. Box of PG tips. So Super X, I'm going to say, probably is a new one. So one out of three for you, Matt Drage. Well done.

Keep your battery brands coming in. We always like to admit new players into the game. We don't have a permanent record of it. We're just not that kind of person. No. Persons. Collective person. It's time for emails, Pete.

Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com if you want to email us in at LukeandPeteShow on Instagram and Twitter. Peter, why don't you take us away with an email today? I'm going to kick off with Chloe's, if that's all right with you. Sure. Hello, Luke and Pete.

If you read this on the show, please do not mention my name. That was from Stephen. I've just been accepted to... Why do people do that? Why do you do that? At the end of it, warm regards, Chloe. Why do you do that?

Why do you do that? Maybe just a second. I mean, it could be any Chloe, surely. Yeah, there's more than one Chloe. There's at least 50 Chloe's in the UK. Yeah, and if you know Chloe, sorry, Stephen, if you know Steve, you will know that they're doing this thing, so don't worry about it.

It's fine. I've just been accepted to grad school for engineering in the UK. Congratulations, Stephen. And I wanted to get both of your recommendations on choosing between the University of Strathclyde, University of York, and University of Essex, based on whatever personal opinions and feelings you have. I'm from California and don't know anything. You're probably not going to enjoy north of Essex. Based on whatever personal opinions and feelings you have, I'm from California and don't know anything.

You're probably not going to enjoy North of the Borderlands. First of all, you shouldn't be asking us. But, no, I was going to say, listen, I've got two things to say. One is Scotland is amazing. It's the University of Strathclyde. It's cold, isn't it? It is. York, Strathclyde, excellent universities.

I don't know universities that well. I'm going to say that's probably shit. I'm going to say it's probably shit. But it is close to London, so you know. Well, Strathclyde's in Glasgow, and Scotland is amazing. And the great thing about Scotland, Chloe, is I've probably waxed lyrical about many times on this show. You're going to get a weather culture shock.

That's going to happen wherever you go in the UK, from California. But within 40 minutes, you can be in the most beautiful countryside you've ever seen if you're based in Glasgow. So definitely consider that.

I know Strathclyde's supposed to be a good university as well. University of York is a fantastic university and there is one really big reason why maybe you should choose there.

Pete, what is it? So again, I was reading the University of Essex tagline, which is at Essex, we I was reading the University of Essex tagline, which is, at Essex, we're a bunch of risk takers,

opinion makers, stereotype breakers and world shakers. Nice. Yeah. I mean, it does say, study at our Colchester campus,

Southend campus and it goes on. Right, okay. It's one of those universities. You're moving to Southend, aren't you? I am, yeah. Maybe I'll study.

So there you go, Chloe. If you want to go to the University of Essex, maybe you'll be based quite near Pete Donaldson. Colchester, Southend, Loughton. What's the want to go to University of Essex, maybe you'll be based quite near Pete Donaldson. Colchester, Southend, Bloughton.

What's the big USP for University of York? Look, you're coming from California. You're going to want your Joe and the Juice juices. Listen, mate, it's Longboy. It's based at the University of fucking York. Yes, of course. Longboy. So if you're not going to go to the university

on the basis of a giant wildfowl, then you are not qualified, frankly. A cathedral and a big long duck, goose, whatever it is. And also, engineering is something that perhaps you could engineer a steampunk trolley for the long boy. You could, yeah.

Help him out. Help a brother out. I think we're going to rank York number one because of Longboy yeah Strathclyde number two because it's beautiful yeah

and Essex I am being stereotypical about Essex fair enough you can hang me out to drive for that depends on how old you are I don't know what grad school

I don't know what if you want to so that's a masters basically yeah if you want to party you're probably not if it's grad school it's a masters yeah you're probably

not that into partying. Chloe slash Stephen also says, not to be a fucking sap, but Luke and Pete show is one of the most comforting and wonderful things to listen to for me

and I very much appreciate getting to enjoy your chum and wit every single week. Yeah, she sounds like a University of Essex kind of woman. Pete can't take compliments. She sounds like

she's got terrible judgment. I will bathe in the splendor of that compliment for quite a long time so thank you very much Chloe I'll hunker down in the shadow

of the long boy comment she should let us know how she gets on Pete yes please yep I want to

I want to like a diary every month presumably she's starting in September yeah if she decides to come over not any good

universities in America pathetic good luck yeah expensive as well to come to university in the UK.

I can imagine. So make the most of it, Stephen. Chloe Stevens. Shows up the coffers of many universities, the international student. Yeah, very much so. So good stuff. All right.

What about this from Sam Blackham? Sam Blackham. I think it's pronounced. I mean, he's probably going to say half of it, even though I don't say my name. He says, hi, Luke and Pete. After listening to a previous episode where you talked about Come Dine With Me,

some more Come Dine With Me chat, I thought I would share some information on behind the scenes of the show. Oh, yes, please. In the late 2000s, my grandparents' next door neighbor was on the show. They're a family friend as well. He's called John,

but we call him Disco. Goodness sake, what kind of character is he? I was playing Mario Kart with my five-year-old niece the other day. You've gone from PUBG to Mario Kart? Well, I was playing with my five-year-old niece, Pete. I can't be taking her through headshots, can I, on PUBG. Just fine.

Get her involved. She could just pick up the drops. She could actually. Pick up the emergency drops. Go to the care packages. I was watching Super Mario Kart. Sorry, playing Super Mario Kart with her. She could actually. Pick up the emergency drops. Go to the care packages. I was watching Super Mario Kart, sorry, playing Super Mario Kart with her. She's pretty good at it.

And you know when you get a star? Yeah. And she called it, she was Peach, obviously. She likes Peach. Every time she got a star, she kept saying, I'm Disco Peach.

I'm Disco Peach. Which I thought was quite cute. Anyway, this man, who is presumably a gentleman in his 50s, it has the nickname Disco John. He was on an episode which was set in Bath, but he didn't actually live in Bath. And he said in the show,

when the other hosts were walking around his house, they found a picture of him disco dancing back in the day, hence the name Disco John. It's all it takes. This is how it worked, apparently. At the start of the day, he was told to place said picture in an obvious place so the others can find it.

He also said that when the crew came to his house, they set up their equipment and took down all the mirrors in the house so you can't see reflections of the crew. It's a really good point, that. Didn't consider that, really. Yeah, I guess so. And it would preclude you from involving... You could have vampire crew as well.

Yeah, could that work? No, because you'd just see a camera float. Oh, you wouldn't see it. Actually, they, could that work? No, because you just see a camera floating. Oh, you wouldn't see it. Yeah, yeah. Actually, they're probably quite preferable,

wouldn't they? Not if you've got blood on the menu. Garlic. Yeah, true. Mate, they like blood. I think vampires cannot be camera people

on Come Down With Me for many reasons. My friend Tommy's been offered the Come Down With Me job loads of times, but he never takes it. Right. And it pisses me off, to be honest. It sounds like a bollock.

He does like a great job where he basically films football games but normally it's a locked off camera he just watches the game but do come and die with me

at least do a couple of them see what it'd be like he said anyway he said the camera crew are quite obtrusive or intrusive I think that means and you have to work

around them rather than it being the other way around he likened the experience to being on the set of a porn film yeah I'd have that. He said they even make you plate up some of the food multiple times

so they could get their shots. He said the crew tell the guests to pretend the food is still hot even if it has cooled while they were getting their shots in. Disco John was probably best known on the show for his love of ketchup. And yes, the cupboard full of ketchup in this episode, if you've seen it, is real. It wasn't set up. He also went on to win the show.

He never explained how he knew what it was like on the set of a porno and I don't think I want to know porno John many thanks Sam Blackham

so I often thought about the camera crew on Come Dine With Me because you know if a camera crew is making a show where they have to set it in a house

and this has happened to me before they knock on the door on a particular street and say can we have a look in your house we're this has happened to me before. They knock on the door on a particular street and say, can we have a look in your house? We're looking for someone to shoot. And they're normally looking, and we used to live in a house,

me and a few of my friends, and it was quite a big house, but obviously we rented it because there was a few of us. And we had people come to us quite a lot because it was quite near central London. And they're looking for houses that are suitable for filming in. Of course, for Come Die With Me, you can't do that.

Right, yeah. Because you've got, I mean, essentially you've got to do it in the house. And some people's houses are just small, right? So it would be quite a difficult, challenging thing to do. Well, it would be quite challenging

to find like five people, is it five people who could be asked to get involved and I think if you found those people, I think they should be ejected from the town. Yeah.

Do you want to come down with me? Get the fuck out then, you misanthrope. I'd love to see you on it. I wouldn't. You know what I'd cook? Something weird. Yeah.

I'd have a crack at ramen. Yeah, it would be a Japanese thing. I'd look like a pervert. I'd show me sword. You say that. Oh, we found a sword, Peter. Oh, yeah, here's me fucking sword. But you say that like it's the TV show's fault.

No, it's not. I know. I realise that. I am a man who loves Japan. I love going there. I love getting pissed not. It's your own fault. No, I realise that. I am a man who loves Japan. I love going there. I love getting pissed there. But just all the other accoutrement and all the other kind of like

things that people think about people who are obsessed with Japan, it's not fair. Because I'm a pervert in so many different ways. I'm a bigger pervert. Like what? Like what?

Computers? Computers. Yeah, just, you know, I like stuff, but I don't like anime or manga or young women yeah what is that

old women old women yeah fair enough but all I'm saying is the show is only going to show you for what you are it's not making you a pervert is it

no they will though it'll go Peter's a 40 year old podcast producer from Hartfordshire da da da da da da da da da they'll be like little school girls running around year old podcast producer from Hertfordshire. It'd be like little school

girls running around going hey hey すごい kawaii this. Right. Yeah true. Never go on it

Pete. No never go on it. I'd look like a problem. Especially with this moustache. You would bring this company

into this review. We would just simply have to insist that you were not the company. Don't go in the garage

do the dinner in the garage anyway I've got nothing else to say just get the fuck out of here we've given them enough shit thanks for the emails they were really good this week

I wish all the very best to Chloe in her educational choice some would argue not me but some would argue that if she's coming to us for the decision

she might already be posted surprised she got through school. Yeah. Thank you very much to James this week for clearing up the dinosaur genitalia question. And thank you very much to Sam for his come dine with me stuff and Mark for his life hack re-deliveroo. We'll be back on Monday for more of this nonsense. And we're bloody looking forward to it as well.

Do stay in touch. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com is the in touch hello at Luke and Pete show.com is the email address at Luke and Pete show is the Instagram and the Twitter and big shout out to producer Nat who does a great

job of this show but also of the social media as well so do follow it producer Nat snacks anyway that's it we'll see you next time have a great weekend

and we'll speak to you later This was a Stakhanov production and part of the ACAST Creative Network.