The Luke and Pete Show - No Sleep 'til Hammersmith

Episode Date: December 1, 2022

Luke’s flown in overnight from the States to record some Luke and Pete Show. It might sound showbiz, but the flight was unfortunately ruined by an unpleasant surprise…In better news, Luke’s brought Pete back a very thoughtful present from his holiday and we also ask the very important question, why doesn’t Pete own a 3D printer?We want you to send in your Christmas stories! Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the spookiest Luke and Pete show introduction I've done since Halloween. Pete Donaldson, Luke Mill with you. We're just a couple of ghoulies in our room talking about, well, ghoulies to be honest. It's mainly a ghoulie-based show, isn't it? You're spookier now than you were at Halloween. I know. Which is a lead-up today

in the intro for me to say that we want people to send Christmas emails in. I'm all over the place. I'm discombobulated now. Yeah, sorry, Lou. You just got back

from America and I am abusing you. You're jet-lagged. You're confused. I'll talk to you about that in a minute. That's right. I am jet-lagged, actually, as well. But don't you about that in a minute. That's right, I am jet-lagged actually as well. But don't worry about that. We genuinely haven't seen each other,

so this should be a really interesting show because we haven't seen each other for quite a long time. So there'll be a lot to get stuck into, I'm sure. But before we do that, it is the 1st of December today. So the sleigh bells are rigging. Are you listening? In Pete's Lane, picket fences are glistening. Don't ask why. I'm not going to continue with that I'm not going to continue with that

but what we do want is for you to send your Christmas themed emails into hello at lukeandpeacher.com we'll do a bumper Christmas mailbag at some point before Christmas but to do that we need to hear from you so hello at lukeandpeacher.com hot on the heels of about three years ago when we did the

worst Christmas disasters that people ever experienced at lukeandpeacher.com hot on the heels of about three years ago and we did the worst christmas disasters that people ever experienced anything around the christmas theme a really positive story a really funny story a really tragic negative story that we can laugh at so don't make it too tragic uh that would be what we want so hello at lukeandpeacher.com it is your responsibility listeners the listening family and your duty to get in touch and tell us about your Christmas stories. Hello at LukeandPeach.com. We'll read our favourites out in a bumper Christmas mailbag when producer Rory tells us to. It really

is as simple as that. When producer Rory tells us to do it, we will simply just do it. Unleash the dogs of admin shouts Rory as we spaff out all of your favourite Christmas stories and less favourite Christmas stories. I mean, like you say, Luke,

I mean, we don't want ultimately the most tragic... We don't want, I was executed with other members of my royal family at Christmas. Well, how would they be, mate? What? Exactly. Ghost emails. Ghost emails from a royal family. But some people may have a little bit of a therapy thing

they want to do with it or an agony uncle type thing. We can do that. We can do that. We can do that. Let's go up to and including agony uncle problems. Let's not go full blown tragic beyond that is what I'm saying. No. There's your cut off.

Woundings. Where do we stand on woundings? How big does the wound have to be before we say no more, please? Four centimetres. Not severing any vital organs or veins or arteries. Correct. Arteries. Right. Yeah. Correct, arteries, right. Yeah, I completely agree.

But let us absolve you of any Christmas sins that you may have. Yes, good one. I would also cast our listeners' minds back to the Hall of Fame listener who told us a story about calling his own mother a cunt on Christmas Day. You know. Yeah, that was strong. That kind of stuff's what we want. Everything from stealing all of the chocolates

out of your sister's advent calendar up to a light wounding of your dad. Yeah. Yeah, all right, cool. Sweet. I mean, so an altercation, perhaps, but not a full-blown fight. I can see altercations happening at Christmas.

We all can. It's a tense, annoying, upsetting upsetting time of year and there's no getting away from that i can think i think there will be altercations in your house at christmas day and i know for a fact you'll be on your own so that's the kind that's the kind of stuff we're talking about right i'll be shouting into my christmas mirror yeah not not this year though chris chris called yourself chris Where's Chris? Chris still in there. I'm the jet lagged

one. You've forgotten your own name. This is up there with when you forgot how Jesus died. I think that was this time last year

wasn't it? I'm just getting worse and worse. I think if someone said to me, someone wanted someone else to describe what the

Luke and Pete show was about, I'd love them to say it's two blokes just chatting shit and one of them genuinely forgot how Jesus died. That to me sums it up really nicely. I probably call you Chris because obviously I do a podcast with a guy called Chris, I do a podcast

with a guy called Mark, I do a podcast I'm adding new ones to the tale. I work with a Lars and a David recently and these are all people I don't work with very often so I'm adding new ones to the tale. I worked with a Lars and a David recently, and these are all people I don't work with very often. So I'm just compobulated. I'll bring this up on the round ball in due course,

but you never noticed David Cartlidge. Great lad. Really nice fellow, right? He sounds exactly like Mark Clattenburg. I don't really... Check it out. I'm not really familiar with how big Clatt sounds, to be honest. He sounds exactly...

Well, I'll tell you now, he sounds exactly like David Cartlidge. Check it out, honestly. At the time of me working with David Cartlidge, I've got to somehow keep my accent in check because if left unchecked, it will be going wild. Is he from Sunderland? He's from Sunderland, yeah. Not Newcastle, as I think Jules ran foul of.

That sounds exactly like Jules. I've just noticed that Mark Lattenberg is from a place called Concert in County Durham. So is that poor by me? Is that just a southern person thinking that all northern people sound the same? Yeah, I guess his accent wouldn't be very similar, I suppose. Yeah, you've had a nightmare there. Oh, well, that's fair enough. Let everyone down.

I've been away. I got back this morning from the US after spending some Thanksgiving time with the American family, which was lovely, really nice. So I've flown straight in overnight, no sleep. No sleep till Brooklyn, baby. No sleep till Hammersmith. So I might be a little bit fruity today. That's the thing that gets me is you have you don't even have the tools to to recover from having no sleep you don't drink coffee luke tea only tea that's

half the caffeine you'd need yeah and you are very milky tea so i don't know how strong your tea is underneath all that torrent of milk and i've got a big frame it's almost like you know if you if you were if you were tranquilizing me like i was a rhino and you want to transport me to new territory i would have to use some kind of opiate i reckon you're gonna have to if the the dose you'd have to use on me to knock me out to pick me up by a helicopter and take me to a new territory would be different than it would be for you if it did the same to you you'd die yeah i would yeah that'd be that'd be too much isn't it you do kind of it's it's kind of like um what this why i find like um as a recent driver i i don't know what like the driving rules are it's better off not doing any drinking i would say uh but it

seems you're fucking serious what of course it's better off not drinking at all i know it's not better no but you really sort of go all right okay so i had a i had three pints eight hours ago how do i work this out right and you're like and you're like am i over the limit i'm not and then i'm like but but i'm a little boy so does that mean i go does that mean my metabolism works quicker does that mean that i'm a little boy and it affects me well it's just it's just it's a bloody minefield so don't drink within three weeks of driving it seems i know a lot of people who are quite nervous about the fact that you're on the road anyway i don't mean that in a rude way i just mean that generally and i think you know when they say that um you know back in the day they were in medieval times whatever they would say if the king has to

say at any point i am the king he's failed right you're right okay yeah but i think it's a general rule with drink driving if you have to question whether you are or not just don't drive just don't drive yeah because yeah what's the what's what's to be gained there's nothing to be gained i i think uh road users would probably be would probably thank me for having um slightly less uh slightly less heightened and sharpened reflexes it's the reflexes that get me into trouble. I should be chilled out more. I know that. I've seen you in action. On the flight back yesterday, right?

You'll like this. The wife I have access to was absolutely delighted with this. She could not believe her luck. So we got ready to check in for the flight back. And because we spent so much time in different countries, we got this frequent flyer club thing with British Airways, airways right just comes when you book a certain amount of flights

and because it's been you know a relationship of many years and a lot of those years have been in different countries you just it just that's just how it was so what it means is we've got this thing where you can check in seven days ahead of time rather than one day and choose your seats and stuff right so when we did that um we got upgraded to business fucking hell yeah and the reason it got great to business is because they couldn't fucking sell the seats for love or money because the plane's so old um so they just did this a solid right but it was good because it meant it meant you got to go in the lounge and i'm not i'm not trying to try and glorify it or lord it up in the middle of a cost of living

crisis to our to our listening family but i'm just saying as a matter of fact that's what happened and you didn't manage to sleep well i'm going to tell you the story if you let me so you said you had no sleep till brooklyn since i haven't i haven't had any and i'm going to tell you why okay so we got we got on the plane and the british airways thing is it's 242 still right so you're jammed in and you're almost like cheek by jowl width ways but you've got more space length ways that makes sense i'm sure you've seen it it's not like it was it's not like it's on emirates or what i'm led to believe it's on like an emirates which is amazing and you've got your own little booth and stuff it's not like that so you're right next to someone so i get put in a seat my wife i've got

access to is on the aisle and i'm in the one in from the island the four facing her and i've got two people next to me right the guy i've got next to me right i'm not making this up is a large man right and i'm not fucking criticizing him i'm a large man myself he was larger than me first thing in life huh the first thing he does right right shoes and socks off standard that's a bit of you to be fair well i find i find your sock and shoe removal worrying okay so if that's a bit of me fair enough we'll give him a pass on that I don't want to be hypocritical we'll give him a pass on that but he did that then right he pops about four valium

that's it yeah lies down flat right turns rolls over so he's facing away from me he's got a pair of very loose

fitting tracksuit bottoms on and his hairy arse crack is about 18 inches from my face the entire flight. Maybe, I mean, just ask for one of his Valium. If he takes four, I mean, if he's taking four Valium, he'll be out for days, won't he?

Yeah, I left him asleep on the plane. Yeah, that's wild. That is absolutely wild. Because you know what they say at the end when you land? They say if you need any extra assistance getting off, please stay in your seat. I think they must have just thought that was him. He was just dead asleep with his arse out. Yeah.

There's not even a way to put a partition up. No. That seems weird that you would be... I mean, I guess it's a business class seat that you didn't really pay for. Yeah, I can see why that would be... I can see why that would be annoying. But could you not have got the... I'm just a nurse. I'm tired. you didn't really pay for it. Yeah, I can see why that would be annoying.

But could you not have got the nurse, I'm tired, can you get the nurse please? Excuse me, nurse. Can you get the attendant to, I don't know, just give you a little protective gauze or a bandage to cover up his pot pot. Yeah, I don't really know what to say though.

I mean, this is me speaking. I don't mind conversations with people. Yeah, exactly. If there's an issue, you would probably complain or say, I'm the sort of person who would be staring into a man's abyss all night. Oh, yeah. Your nose could be up his arsehole and you wouldn't complain. Correct, because I'd like it.

But anyway, so the Wi-Fi I have access to was... I'll have what I'm having, I'll shout. Yeah, so I can say the so the wife I have access to, she was delighted. Because there was a partition between her and I. She said, you can just put the partition up, get on with it. I'm stuck there.

I'm stuck in the purgatory. I wanted the fucking plane to crash. I mean, did you watch a film? Was the food nice could you have a couple of drinks I watched Good Will Hunting and it made me cry

oh that's the problem watching anything watching anything it's I had a bit of a cry this morning over the fucking dog again

oh poor you that's sad over the I think when you're up in the air though it's very easy to kind of is it it's very easy to cry isn't Is it? Is that a thing? It's very easy to cry, isn't it?

Is it? Yeah, yeah, because I've cried at... Who's that Ryan Reynolds guy? Death Man, Deathloop. What's his name? Deadpool. Deadpool. Deathloop.

I cried at Death... Good game, Deathloop. Deadpool. I cried at Deadpool 2. That was... But what specific bit? Not just the prospect of watching it, presumably. game, Deathloop. Deadpool, I cried at Deadpool 2. That was... But what specific bit? Not just the prospect of watching it, presumably. I think it's him looking in at his wife. I think his wife had died or something.

It's just that, you know, it's that usual woman in peril kind of trope that part of my brain thinks is terrible, but I'm a sucker for it. That's why you will occasionally walk into a pub and just try and save every woman in there, right? What do you mean? Save them from what? Alcohol?

Anything. Give me that booze! You just decide. The bit that got me in Good Will Hunting is the bit... Are you familiar with the film? Yes. Yeah, yeah. It's all about... I can't remember what film I was watching that skewers that film. There we go. This will be good. What's it about?

In your memory, what's Good Will Hunting about? Well, I'm fairly certain it's described by someone. Might have been a stand-up, actually. He was just saying that that film is all about a fucking genius

who women want to have sex with and it's written by the same bloke who stars in it. Yeah. Well, that is true, isn't it? Oh, he's a genius. He's a genius. Who wrote this? Who isn't it? Oh, he's a genius. He's a genius. Who wrote this?

Who wrote this film? Oh, it's Matt Damon. For some people, don't some people, by the way, stand-up comic center, that's a bit fucking rich. Don't people just reduce things, though?

Do you know when people do that thing, there must be a word for it, where they just reduce things down, so they'll go, Into a mental consom. Oh, watching the World Cup,

what, it's just 22 blokes chasing around a rubber ball? Yeah, or... I remember a dear friend of mine, and he won't mind me saying this, because he's also of this parish, so to speak, Adam Durrell, who directs and produces and does a brilliant job on Boom and Jackie the Ripper and The Offensive.

We're pretty good pals. And I saw him the other day before I went away and he goes to me I can't really get with Succession, it's just loads of annoying people having conversations followed by music and a helicopter ride, I was like, it kind of is that, but it's more than that, and I think Good Will Hunting is very much more than that, but the bit that got

me upset, well not upset but emotional, I'm not sure if you're familiar with the scene but when he finally goes to meet the robin williams character sean mcguire who's the um the the therapist who kind of you know he gets a bond with london's burning yeah well that's that i was actually thinking that on the plane i was all over the place emotionally i was thinking of a 90s boy band turned actor singer uh who did a song song didn't he used to do it didn't he used to take his top off a lot Sean Maguire yeah yeah he was very much in the

Adam Woody that's Ian Beale why is this show so avant garde Adam Hill yeah was the son of the jeweller discussed before and Adam Ricketts Adam Ricketts ricketts that's

fair enough yeah that's that's fair enough um you know you know this this show's become for you this show's become you know they say about picasso when he saw the the horrors of the spanish civil war or whatever that's when he started painting surrealist paintings because it affected him so badly he just went completely off the rails that's happened to you at some point I'd love to know what your Guernica was probably my big man's arse probably started doing wrestling big man's big arse yeah it was

it was the Randy Savage match against Hulk Hogan one time oh this is horrific once you've seen that you you'd never come back

but the bit that got me in Good Will Hunting is when they're sitting outside on the pond and Robin Williams breaks down Matt Damon's character and talks about it do you know what I would say, and this is not a controversial thing

and it's not even a new thing to say Robin Williams in that film is fucking brilliant, he's brilliant in that, he's so good in that film, it's unbelievable how brilliant he is is he not the star of the show, I guess? In a way, I think he is.

But I mean, obviously, it's not necessarily about him. But it just hit me right in the fucking heart how good he was in it and how good that scene is. I did that thing where it's not where you're actually crying, sobbing, but the tears are just coming.

Right. It's almost like a weeping type thing. Anyway. Yeah. But again, I don't think you'd be doing that on the ground. I don't think you'd be doing that in your front room. I just think the whole.

Is it the altitude, Pete? I think it's the altitude. I think people, people, I was going to say far more learned than I. I mean, like, I mean, they literally researched it. I didn didn't research anything i don't know anything there's a there's a there's a there's

a dementia drug that's apparently his fucking dream dementia drug and it's kind of like and it works really well the early signs of dementia and i'm like that's that i'm gonna need i'm gonna need a ramped up version of that drug, please, because I'm fairly certain the plaque is starting to wrap around my fucking brainstem, honestly. Have you been in a situation on a plane where you've been weeping at a film and the attendants come over and you've just gone, the air is so thin! It's the recycled air! It's dead boy!

It's dead boy! It's dead boy! So anyway, I think my American family will be absolutely touched to my tribute of my visit of their country by talking about a man's arse cracking

me crying at Goodwill hunting on the plane other stuff did also happen yeah but I also and what I will say is that I was with the great LC

and he and I 3D printed you a wallet. So I had no idea that L.C., big Larry, big L, who's grown a beard in record time, it seems. Oh, he is the sort of man who, you know, he will grow a beard in a day.

Like proper Desperate Dan stuff, innit? It looks like it's an amazing beard. Why was Desperate Dan called Desperate Dan? Was he like a Desperado sort of thing? We're going to have to unpack that. First of all, Desperate Dan doesn't have a beard. No, but as soon as he shaves, he finds it very hard to find

a razor that will shave his manly bristles. He'll shave a bit and it'll go, and it's just instantly a beard again. But why are you so short of bearded a bit and it'll go and it's just instantly a beard again. But why are you so short of bearded references that the first thing you thought was a person without a beard? But anyway,

so we 3D printed you a wallet. It was amazing. It was an amazing experience for me. Because you've never seen... You've never seen... Did you have any concept about how a 3D print would work? Do you know what I mean?

Remember who you're talking to? I walked down to the stairs to the basement and saw it printing something else. And I was literally like, what the fuck is that? What is that? Yeah. I'd never seen one before.

But isn't it interesting how when you think about it, it's so simple, but it's taken so long to create a machine that does it so well do you know what i mean yes i do not and to make it so accessible for anyone who fancies doing it yeah and so the way i mean i'm i know i'm behind the curve so i'm not going to spend my time explaining what a 3d printer is to people listening but what i was impressed by was that so lc uses it to make things that genuinely make his house better right it's like little ball little plastic borders for things in the garage little holders for his tools or that kind of it actually does have a practical use yeah and then and then what and

then as you said to me because i sent you a video because lc said i'll give this to pete this is one i've made for pete he basically went, downloaded a wallet onto a memory card, put the memory card in the 3D printer, and printed it in like five hours out of this quite robust plastic, and bang, you've got yourself a card holder, a wallet. That's really kind, especially in an energy crisis. I appreciate the spending time and energy on that. I think that's really sweet.

Also, the massive roll of plastic that they use to 3D print, that's like $20. What do you mean? As in, like, is that cheap or expensive? Yeah, it's like a reel. So it's like a massive cable reel, but it's plastic.

It's so cheap for what you can print out of it. Yeah, I guess so. But I mean, yeah. I mean, I guess there are... And there are also different kinds that like work better for different, you know, tensile objects and stuff like that. But I do find the whole thing fascinating, but it's just kind of like I just don't have this one thing I think in my life that I could have 3D printed. And it was like a little wheel that went on a dishwasher that I reckon I could have cadded and put in a 3D printer. But I would have got the dimensions wrong

because I'm not a details man and it would end up being as big as my room. Yeah, it would have been, yeah. A big wheel. And at what point do you stop it? You go into the room and you're like, fuck, what's happening here? Exactly.

And it would be like the big Venus flytrap in Little Shop of Horrors. Yeah, yeah. Can I just say, and i think i'll speak on behalf of the whole luke and peach family when i say this it is hugely damaging to your personal brand that you don't have a 3d printer yeah i guess so i just i i just know i would sort of walk past it i've got this little app uh this little sort of um very conventional printer but it sticks on stick to the wall and uh you can basically type in

whatever you want to draw like draw it onto your iphone or your or your your your phone and then it basically downloads it onto the printer and then it sticks to the wall and draws it massive on the wall that's really cool yeah and i've never never used that and i always think ah but it's like when you've got a hammer, everything looks like a nail. Like I haven't found the nail for this needing to draw on the wall. I think I'll speak on behalf of everyone else. I hope you do find that subject. Yeah, exactly.

I need a reason to draw on a wall. Do you think there's any chance that they could start doing proper 3D printing using other materials other than just plastic? What do you mean? Like metal and stuff? Because I there is some like pioneering stuff around like a kind of mdf type material i think it's one i mean they they do like i mean they print with i mean they technically use the exact same concepts to 3d print houses with cement and stuff like that but it's you know how how safe how energy efficient how um financially viable it is for for home printers and the

difference between like a 99 quid kit that you'd buy in like dixon's or curry's pc world or whatever compared to something you'd spend 20 grand on it would still kind of look similar but it would obviously have very very different capabilities and how um you know the different kinds of models you could print out but it's it's all bloody fascinating i'm so i was really pissed off to hear that like half the stuff in your house isn't 3d printed by now that's poor by you i think i know i'm sorry um right let's have a quick break when we come back we'll do some um batteries because it's thursday and that's what we do on a thursday uh maybe some more chatting as well um so don't go anywhere before you do go

for your little break uh hello at lukeandpeach.com for your christmas themed emails that's a reminder i'm going to do another reminder between now and the end of the show but please do remember to send those christmas themed emails in because the christmas mailbag special is going to be great and we want you to be a part of it we're back with luke and peach show and uh i spent the entirety of that ad break my stomach just making crazy crazy noises why why is my stomach making crazy crazy noises because i literally ate bolognese for breakfast let's move on to some emails it's just batteries but you know what to do i'm searching you're reading yeah

all right okay cool. Hello to Stefan. Stefan, dear Luke and Pete, as you recently accepted store brand batteries by the German electronics retailer Conrad, I thought I might as well send in these baby blue beauties that I bought in 2018 when Danish retailer Klaus Olsen ended its brief foray into the German market. I got them at a massive clearance sale at their only store in Hamburg. For good measure, I'll also throw in German supermarket Edeka's own brand Gut & Gunstig, which literally translates as good and cheap.

Greetings from Berlin. That's great. Good to hear from you. Good and cheap. Thank you very much for getting in touch, Stefan. That's awesome. So I am delighted to say that both those brands given that pete's recent diktat saying that we are going to accept department store batteries klaus olsen is a new player that's that's definitely uh one in the bag and gut and gunstig is too imagine if i was imagine if i was a dictator that had to create rules

um they would be so changeable yeah as inconsistent and changeable and they wouldn't make sense. You'd have a lovely time. You could trick me very easily. Yeah, you could, but I also wouldn't leave the house. That's true. I'd be falling foul of some kind of weird... Yeah, there'd be fire coming out your taps. Tom. Tom from Cheshire of Power of Love infamy.

I don't remember that. Hi, chaps. It's very much a long shot, but any chance for this boot? I've opened a Pandora's box here. We're just getting shop-owned brand batteries. Boots, extra, long life, alkaline, double A's. Is it a new player? Found in a wireless mouse, a bit out of date.

Cheers. Tom from Cheshire. Do you know what? It's a really interesting battery because it looks like it should be really old, but it actually only went out of date in June of last year. So it's a rotten orange colour, isn't it? Yeah, but under Pete's new rules,

that's a new player. No one's sent a Boots Extra Long Life in before, so we've got a new player there. Congratulations. You've found a new battery. It's in the Hall of Fame. I'm modifying the rules to get you in the Hall of Fame,

which is just great for the game. It's great for the game. More exciting games. more goals being scored. Mark says, Hello, Mr. Luke and Mr. Pete. Not emailed in a while because, to be frank, my life is quite dull. The most exciting thing that happened

was the bin man taking my garden waste as well as the regular rubbish on regular bin day, which now I think about it, might just be in your wheelhouse of excitement. Bin day. We're a big fan of bin days and how that's particularly administered. Anyway, attached to some thought of a battery

I'm sure you've had before, but oh well, I've had a couple of winners in the past. This was found in my BT remote. Hope all is well with you, Mark. Omni Remote Alkaline. Omni Remote Alkaline. Thank you very much for that email, for sending that in, Mark.

Appreciate it. But we've had Omni Remote Alkaline quite a few times in the past and most recently from our friend simon ponting on july 31st he sent some in um with a picture so you are not a new player i'm afraid it's a lovely purple it's the sort of purple uh that can only be found on the side of a cartoon dinosaur or a high-end internet vibrator? High-end. It has to be high-end. High-end.

Hang on a minute. What colour is it? Purple? Yeah, it's high-end. Yes, high-end. It's one of those purple ones. Yeah, brilliant. Plug it in.

Speaking of bin day, did you see that... Garbage day! It might have been on The Guardian. There's a long read about the prevalence of reminiscing memory lane type facebook posts which are the facebook posts that do so the most well on facebook right yeah remember this i remember that you and i talk about quite a bit actually like oh remember when people used to

eat spangles and didn't come home until it got dark and your house didn't have a door yeah yeah exactly but apparently this good boy i've read the article, this guy wrote about it, and he said that one of the most prevalent things is this phenomenon of quote-unquote proper bin men. What does he mean? There was just this idea that back in the day, bin men used to lug proper bins with no wheels over their shoulders, were always whistling.

We're always friendly. And we're always like really super trustworthy and therefore reminiscent and indicative of like a much better time in Britain. Right, okay. And even saying that sounds mad because obviously it is mad. But that's apparently like a really big important part of like these nostalgia type Facebook posts. Remember proper bin men.

Because, you know, the highlight of any shut-ins week is bin day, isn't it? Because you've got a reason to get up early. I've got to get up. I've got to get up. I don't have to get up that early, but certain people in my house

are scared we're going to miss the bins. So I've got to get up early. Well, that's obviously your part in it because there's only two of you in there. Could be one of the dogs. Could be one dog. Yeah, they're very insistent that um that the the the bins might not go out um so i do get up slightly earlier than what i would usually but it is it is it is slightly stressful because you never know what they're going to take you

never know what they're not going to take and uh i think i the thing that sort of took me back a little bit was the rag and bone man came down the road a couple of weeks ago and where do you live again? the 1950s what the fuck are you talking about?

what do you mean? you have a rag and bone man don't you? I have a guy who comes round and asks me if I want any fresh fish you go well exactly it's the same size of a different coin

not that probably the same bloke. Yeah, same bloke. But, like, nowadays, you know, they don't come around. Because it was every week you'd have the rag and board, rag and board man on a horse and cart in Hartlepool. Certainly, like, everywhere I've lived in Hartlepool I had a rag and board man with a horse and cart.

And nowadays, like, it's just a bloke in a van and he's just honking his horn yeah there's no there's no romanticism is there no there's no like yeah he's just honking his horn at least shout rag and bone so i know what like yeah but he's not a bit cross machine at least exactly i want you to abuse the one there are house growing up um he used to ring a bell a massive bell so you knew it was him and he would take anything yeah that that but my dad used to tell me that that that when he's ringing the bell or playing his little jingle it means that he had he doesn't have any room on his car yeah right nice classic you don't i don't know what they were doing with that stuff i had no

idea what they're doing with it but people get reminiscent about it's funny isn't it because they say about like conservative people are nostalgic for a past that never was and liberal people are looking forward to a future that's not possible right? which is quite a good kind of thing

but people do get really into the idea of do you remember when the milkman do you remember when you know the milkman would come and you'd know his name and you'd go around his house for christmas like that never fucking happened it never half of that stuff never happened you know yeah it just didn't so i don't know what it is that makes people so nostalgic about but apparently proper quote-unquote proper bin men um are the thing that people get very, very emotionally attached to because apparently they always used to whistle a tune

and had a smile on their face and were strong, real men who could lug stuff over their shoulder. None of this wheelie bin nonsense. It's just a weird thing that people get into. It's a lot of, yeah, very bizarre. And you can't be lugging around big old bins all your life. Your knees are supposed to be shot.

Your back is supposed to be shot. Well, they were, weren't they? Plus, probably retired at 50 and were dead at 60, probably. Yeah, the good old days. I was thinking about it. I was thinking about it before. I would like to. I like tat.

I like getting all the tat. I like getting all of other people's tat. I love antique fairs. I love antique markets. I like car boot sales. So working down the tip is a bit of a dream of mine. But I did sort of think at one point,

I was like, what about asbestos? Yeah, what about it? Well, like, I don't think people are that... I don't trust people with disposing of their own asbestos. They wouldn't know that they were getting rid of a load of asbestos. You can't get rid of your own now.

I know, but if I worked down the tip, I wouldn't know what I was looking at. So someone could turn up with a load of really dangerous stuff, and I wouldn't know. I just would not know that was asbestos. Like nuclear waste or an atom bomb. Nuclear waste or an atom bomb. Well, yeah, of course, if it's a big bomb, it's just a big bomb, and it's sparking and stuff

so no but if you if you if you I think I'll be honest with you if you were working at a tip and someone brought

an unexploded World War 2 bomb to the tip your first instinct would be I'm taking that home yeah I mean if it's not exploded

no take my chances yeah exactly unexploded odd and ends oh just my luck anyway let's go literally that's the

first time I've ever been able to contextually say on that bombshell we can get out of here we'll be back on Monday of course

as we always are but before we go you know the score by now Christmas emails hello at lukeandpeach.com get them in

we'll come up with a few Christmas stories of our own we'd love to hear from yours as well. Anything that fits the bill. Take it in any direction you want, but do get in touch because we'd like to do

a Christmas bumper mailbag at some point this December. Thank you very much for listening. It's goodbye from Pete Donaldson. Bye-bye. And it's goodbye from me as well. Have a great weekend. Speak to you next time. The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack Production and part of the ACAST Creator Network. Embrace it. Journey starts when you say so. If you've got five minutes or 50, Peloton Tread has workouts you can work in.

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