The Luke and Pete Show - Outlaw mod hairdresser

Episode Date: December 9, 2021

Welcome to today's modcast! The thought of Pete Donaldson driving over two hours to Norwich to go to an Indie night was too much for Luke on today’s show. Thankfully, Donaldson is still in his prime... We finish the show by revisiting a highly controversial topic - the full English breakfast - as we have an email about a hero of the fry-up community who is shouldering the burden for the rest of us.Send us your stories about your best and worst Christmases! [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the Luke and Pete show. We're back, recording a load of shows in a row because of rambling and Clash of the Titling and other shows. We're finding it hard to find studio space at the moment, aren't we, Luke? It's so busy and the crystals are space at the moment, aren't we, Lukey? It's so busy and the crystals are all up. Oh, aren't we just so great?

Is that what you're saying? You're saying how great we are? It's unlike you. I think so. Yeah, it's unlike me. It's really unlike you. I'm confused now. You had a little cup of coffee, have you?

I've had three cups of coffee today. I'm a little bit tired, actually. I went to an indie night in norwich uh over the weekend i'm still recovering from that to be quite frank oh mate well when i went out wednesday night i still felt a little bit rough on friday night terrible getting old isn't it it's no good so you went to an indie night on saturday night in norwich yeah and weirdly you told me about it and thought i wouldn't take the piss out of you what's wrong with that it's just a couple of someone playing mccall monta butler at one point i'd put but you could play all those songs at

home like i don't understand what you go so far to go to how old do you sound i know i understand that i understand that but like it's you you live in you live in like east essex right right and you traveled all the way to norwich to go to an indie night. Yeah, correct. It's like a two and a half hour drive, isn't it? Yeah, it is. It was two hours ten, but I had a nice time. My partner got about as drunk as I've ever seen her, which was, it's like, if you go out for a little while,

you don't sort of realise what kind of messy drunk they are when they're messy drunk. And I've not really seen them before. Did you have to drive home? Not on that night, no. Okay, no okay so you just stayed overnight as well i would not be not drinking the commitment to the indie night is so real it's so real i didn't realize how real it was i thought it only extended to insisting on going to indie bars in any city around the world you go to but you'll actually drive two hours plus to see some guy with longer hair, who's got a bit of BO, play fucking CDs.

Correct. Luke, you would not believe how my night started. I and my partner, the partner I have access to, had food, had dinner in a Vodka Revolution. Did you know they do food? I didn't even know that was possible. You're a fucking boss level. This is fucking proper, like, galaxy brain stuff.

What did you have? I had chicken wings and burgers and nachos and all in Vodka Revolution. They've got a little kitchen in there. I had no idea. Yeah, I thought they just served up good times. But turns out they served... You can't have good times on an empty stomach, mate.

That's what they've pointed out. That's what they've worked out. Listen, joking aside, I know that if it's what you want to be doing, you should be fucking doing it, of course, 100%. I'm right. It's just, I wonder if there's an indie night you can have access to that's a bit closer to home.

There is, yeah. There's one in Raleigh, the Pink Toothbrush. Have you heard of that one before? Yeah, I know the Pink Toothbrush. I've been there a couple of times, yeah. Bit of a legendary night. I didn't even know itbrush. I've been there a couple of times, yeah. Bit of a legendary night. I went... I think that's still going, to be honest. Still going, yeah.

I mean, there's not much to do in really, apart from go to the Home Base or the Wicks or the Sainsbury's or the McDonald's. My friend Tommy's from Epping, which isn't that far, I mean, relatively speaking to where I live, isn't that far away from there. Right, okay. So I know it.

So you were going to the Norwich one for a particular reason. What was your highlight? What was the best banging song, banging anthem they played? Oh, I think McCalmont and Butler. Yes, you rarely see that on a big, hear that in a big room, in a big speak, in a big TV studio where they've done the wrestling before. It's fun. And did they play a lot of pulp?

They didn't play as much pulp. We got one spin of babies. But to their credit, even though the night was called Common People, I don't even think I heard Common People, which is good. And what time did it finish up? One o'clock. Nice and early. Nice and early for the olds.

Apparently Robbie Knox was there, was he? Yeah, I turned up and Robbie Knox had brought the mayor along Jack mate he'd did you speak to Robbie he's Mr Norwich I spoke to Robbie I don't get to speak to him very often see he's a good lad I bought him a round of drinks but though

I did buy I bought a round of drinks and then he went he went off with his drinks but he didn't but I'd ordered two apple sours one for went off with his drinks but he didn't but i'd ordered two apple sours one for me and one for robbie but he'd only cleared off but so i had to sit in the bar joylessly what are you doing stop stop stop the story what are you doing i don't feel comfortable i don't feel comfortable even though i'm hundreds of miles away at a weekend knowing that you have driven two and a half hours

to go to an Indianot in Norwich and you are banging apple sours at the bar. I don't feel comfortable talking to you. Yeah, I'm banging out the apple sours. Yeah, they're delicious. You kind of forget how delicious those fuckers are, to be quite frank. I've not forgotten that. And your guts would have been in ribbons the next day.

Absolute ribbons at your age. Yeah, I was all right. I was all right. Listen, I think people who are tuning into this show will think, do you know what? Luke is an old curmudgeon who doesn't know what he's talking about. And Donaldson knows where the party's at. That's what they'll be thinking.

That's what they'll be thinking. And they'd be right, wouldn't they? They'd be right. They would be right. A man with a feathered haircut kept coming over. A man who sort ofed haircut kept coming over. A man who sort of takes his stylistic cues from Paul Weller. He came over, kept giving us Jäger bombs,

so I was slamming them back as well. So, yeah, good night was had by all. But, look, I recommend it. I don't think... I presume Jack, being under 30, enjoyed it quite as much as I did. Just probably confused. Just probably a bit confused. Where did all these old people come from? I think the feathered Paul Weller haircut

is the single worst haircut of any fashion era of all time. And I include the mullet in that. The way that... Apparently, there's someone in Leon C, there's a barber's, where a woman, like, once a week will take a residency in a barber shop and all the mods from all around come.

Oh, she specialises in that haircut? And she specialises in that fucking haircut. It's incredible. I didn't know that was a thing. That's a really interesting little subculture. I had no idea about that. They're on the Lambretta forums getting their fucking haircut tips. Yeah.

So I heard, and I actually heard this on, I think it might be on the BBC. I heard that a lot of black people find it difficult to find, in certain parts of the country, find places that will do their hair well. And it's like a real kind of like, almost like a racist microaggression, a hallmark of the society that we live in, where certain types of ethnic minorities or whatever you want to say aren't catered for in terms of having their hair looked after they have to travel some people have to travel miles to have somebody who actually knows how to cut their hair because the hair is slightly different i had

no idea that these outlaw mod hairdressers were travelling the country, popping into different towns, only cutting the mods. That's unbelievable. Yeah, it's incredible, isn't it? Yeah. I just, but what do you even ask for that? If you want that haircut, what do you actually ask for? I don't think words are exchanged.

You go in, you book your appointment, you go in, you nod, you go in you nod you sit down you thumb through your copy of you know the latest Paul Smith winter collection someone sticks the style cancel

on the old jukey and you talk about how it used to be great in the old days and then you know that you don't say anything else because you know

you're going to see them at the mod night later that night in mumbo jumbos what do you think about if people if people are mods and they're listening to see them at the mod night later that night in mumbo jumbos. What do you think about, if people are mods and they're listening to this show, will they hate us for saying that?

I don't know. I think if you are into the mod scene, you've got to be quite secure in your own world, I suppose. It's kind of... Thick skin. Everyone seems like they're having a lovely time, I suppose. They have their own mods and podcasts. Modcasts. Modcasts, of course they do.

They must do, surely. Surely. I'd love to do a podcast series about the outlaw mod hairdresser travelling from salon to salon. Yeah. Dealing with dry skin. Old man's dry skin on their heads. Thinning scalps.

Thinning scalps. How do you emotionally deliver the news that your hair's too thin for this now sir i reckon the occasional mod hairdresser just has the old breakdown i just can't i just can't i can't cover up anymore i can't i can't give you what you want it's just not enough to work with anymore i can't deliver the bad news oh yeah yeah and paul weller um paul Weller's hair's never looked worse. I confidently say that with every passing day. Because it never gets better.

If you're into Paul Weller, he's a pretty good person to get into because he never stops releasing music. If you're into the Mannix and you manage to get through the last three albums... I don't even like you call them the Mannix and you manage to get through the last three albums... I don't even like you calling them the Mannix. You're not on Absolute Radio now, mate. I liked the Mannix up until the fourth album.

You call them the Mannix. The Mannix, everyone knows what I'm talking about. The judge was the kind of person who drives two hours to go to a mod night using terms like Mannix. If I'm in the Mannix, I'm wearing a feather boa, I've got a big leopard print Pat Butcher jacket, and I've got eyeliner on. So it's just a different look, isn't it?

It is. I think that would suit you really well. Yeah, I think so too. I think maybe there's a little bit of bitterness from my side because the type of hair I've got, which is curly and thick, I could probably never get the mod cut. No, I mean, there's very few kind of movements you could have got into, maybe.

Like, who did One Arm Scissor? You probably could have been a member of that band. Oh, yeah. Driving, one of my favourite bands. And also, he's put the beef on now, that guy. Has he? Yeah, ever since he gave up the hard stuff, he's got into his eating by the look of it.

Good on him. Good on him. Healthy. Healthy boy. I remember, so I know someone who used to look after at the drive-in back in the day, back around the turn of the century. And he said they were an impossibly difficult band to look after because there was five of them, plus the associate hangers-on.

And basically an equal amount of numbers of them were into cocaine, heroin, boozing, and basically an equal amount of numbers of them were into cocaine, heroin, boozing, and pills. So no one wants to do the same thing at the same time, at any point. It's impossible to get them to do anything together. I mean, group the pill people and the coke people together, because they're going to stay up late. Heroin and weed

and booze, to be honest, they'll probably go home quite soon, quite early, so get them. So there'll be two camps more than anything else. The great thing about the heroin ones is they always feel at home, don't they? They just sit anywhere. They're happy. They're happy.

Yeah. So I could definitely get into it. So I think what's happened, I remember hearing a story, I can't remember who told me, it might have been the same guy, saying that there was so little to do in El Paso, Texas, where the driver the out of driving

from the two main guys omar and cedric used to go to straight edge and heights right in house parties and stuff like that and in the middle of the living room would just make a big show of smoking a crack pipe just to get into fights so that people would kick off and stuff it's a baffling existence. But anyway, as what tends to happen, we've seen it happen with Pete Doherty, haven't we? He's given it all up. Now he's putting the food away like nobody's business. Fair enough.

He's a breakfast boy now. He is a big breakfast boy now. I'm not judging him. Don't mistake him. If you're a new listener to the show, don't mistake me for judging him. I'm a big fan of the food myself. I get it. I'm just saying it's quite interesting how either people are replacing that drug use with food use or they just you know what they're eating more because they're healthier and they're putting a bit of weight on good on them because a lot of them can

be very slim can't they peter indeed and speaking of uh god's bounty luke did you read that uh joel remember you know that uh pasta that's always criticized when whenever anything terrible happens in places like texas uh where people are displaced because of uh flooding or uh like snow flurries and stuff like you know surprise bad weather yeah and tornadoes and stuff no you're talking about tech cruz oh yeah well yeah those kind of people joel osteen the pastor he's got that big church the lakewood church in houston texas massive fucking building um did you see that in many ways a lot of us hope for a prosperous new year uh joel austin he will never need to because he just constantly uh he's just constantly getting lucky everywhere he he looks at you know god's very much um shining a lot of favour on him at the moment,

even though he never lets anybody into a super church when people are out of their houses. In 2014, back in 2014, robbers apparently stole more than $600,000 from a safe

at Lakewood Church in Houston, in Texas. Terrible news. Terrible stuff, this. But last week, a plumber called Justin, which is a great name for a plumber. I'm just in your pipes. I'm just in your pipes. I'm just in your cavity wall.

It all starts... He was working on a toilet in the megachurch, the mega superchurch, and he had to remove all the tiles and the insulation, and once he removed the insulation, he discovered 3,000 envelopes full of money and checks.

Fuck you now. How'd that get in there then? That's unbelievable. Luke, we can only suggest we can only legally suggest that the robbers took that money and hid it in a wall for later, for to take out later. Like an ATM. That's incredible.

And when you started talking about that, I thought you were going to talk about Ted Cruz, who obviously Donald Trump famous used to call lying Ted. And then there was a natural disaster in Texas, the state that he is partly responsible for. And he just fucked off on holiday. So everyone started calling him Flying Ted. And I thought that's what you were going to say. Because when the shit goes down, Ted just fucks off. To Mexico. Those mega

churches and those prosperity gospel types, it is really, I mean, it's just scandalous just how much they'll get away with, how much they'll exploit. They are basically people who claim to be men of the Lord and are worse than, and it is always men, they are worse than even like godless heathens like ourselves, Pete.

We all know that you pray to the god of the self-built PC, don't you? And it's a great place to start your religion. Look, we've got a couple of patrons set up, but at least we give them audio. At least we give them audio in return. That's all I'm saying. We say what we're going to do. And we don't say to them, if you don't become a patron,

and you're going to hell. Even if we do sometimes think it. Spellsie does say that, to be fair. And he's got an eye on the inside, to be quite frank. He knows what he's talking about. He's the man who would know. Speaking of self-built PCs, I wanted to ask you a question because listeners to the show will have known that fairly recently

you got in trouble in the local neighbourhood trying to deal with a child's magic wand. What? Oh, right, yeah, OK. Yeah, I mean, if this is the first look of peach shore uh you're hearing it's not that it's i'm fine i'm fine well it might we don't know yet yet to be discovered yet to be discovered but i've also heard on the grapevine that you are doing a slightly i mean you could explain it yourself so i won't be pejorative at this point

you are apparently putting together, doing a very neighbourly thing, perhaps, putting together a computer for your neighbour's child. There's no perhaps about it, mate. I've built that boy a gaming PC. Yeah, but you're not CRB checked, is my point. I mean, what even is that these days? Surely you're just assumed to be not a threat to the community.

No, they changed it now. They changed it. Now everyone is a threat unless you prove that you're not. Right, okay. Well, I think I am CRB checked. Didn't I have to do that for a school thing?

I think I had to submit some details because I was helping out in a school. So yes, I think I am CRB checked actually. Thank you very much. Okay, in which case,

carry on. Carry on. How did this come about? Next door's Littlen. Well, he much. Okay, in which case, carry on. Carry on. What happened to this guy? Next door's little and... Well, he's not little. He's taller than me. He's a 15-year-old boy. He's a 14-year-old boy. He saved up a load of money to build a PC.

And, Luke, let me tell you, it's never been a worse time to build a fucking PC financially. Why? Because all of the graphics cards are being used to mine Bitcoin. So you can't... And there's also a chip shortage coming out of China

and Korea and places like that. So you can't get the chips to put in the fucking things. And B, when you do make them, the miners take them to mine bloody Bitcoin. So there's no value in the market in january to be quite frank luke and uh we managed to sort of grab a decent uh level of pc um yeah we dodged

to grab a decent level of pc uh with the bits that we could put together but i it was a little bit because i did it in their in their um room, sort of putting together this PC. It felt a bit like Bake Off. It felt a little bit like putting together a PC with a bit of an audience. And I'm not a big game player, Luke. I'll sometimes come up with the goods, but I don't like to do it in front of an audience. It was kind of a little bit like doing Bake Off,

doing like Robert Wallace. Did you have to bluff any bits? Say again? Did you have to bluff any bits uh not really but i did at one point uh i thought the hard drive had broken and i was like oh the hard drive's broken i'll i'll go down to pc world and or wherever and the high street pc shop and buy a a new hard drive to see if this that would but it hadn't i just hadn't plugged it in i just hadn't plugged it in and and i am how did you start that out uh i was so embarrassed i just uh put two hard drives in there and said everything's fine it's fine so he got a free hard drive out of me to happy christmas you're so on brand you're so on the

brand so basically rather than just own the fact that you made a slight mistake you were so to Happy Christmas Oscar. You're so on brand. You're so on brand. So basically, rather than just own the fact that you made a slight mistake, you were so embarrassed you gave him about 300 quids worth of hardware. I gave him about 90, well, 100 quids worth of hardware. So yeah, no, yeah. So that's just a Christmas box. I was just like so annoyed with myself.

I was like, no, you fucking idiot. What games is he into? What games are you into? I don't know, he's into kids stuff, isn't he? Just Apex and fighting

and shooting ones and stuff. I mean, kids ones as in, you know, the violent ones rather than Roblox or whatever.

Yeah. That's a very nice thing for you to do though. You're developing a bit of a reputation around the local community, surely? Well,

I let everyone down because I was at the Acast Christmas party when everyone put the lights up. We've got these beautiful lights to do that you're developing a bit of a reputation around the local community surely well i i let everyone down because i was at the aircast christmas party when everyone put the lights up we've got these beautiful lights in the street damien he's a bit of a a captain of the uh of the community uh around around town and uh he's over the road he's the bloke who does the the rum and stuff um and he uh and he invited everyone over and and they put the lights up and stuff. And so we've got this amazing kind of light set up in our street. It looks really, really lovely. I'll send a picture.

It's really, really nice. And on the night they got turned on, Damien brought a big fire pit out, and we stood around the fire, and me and Sarah, because we're new in the area, we got the honour of turning on the christmas lights my second christmas lights turning on uh in my life after after highgate i know was it um holloway road it's holloway luke because alexane didn't turn up because alex didn't turn up correct yeah how many people were there when

you did it at holloway road it's quite a few um I was on the poster of the Christmas bauble, I seem to recall. And, yeah, I just told all the kids that their favourite T4 presenter wasn't going to rock up because... And everyone went, oh, worst Christmas ever. Worst Christmas ever. Nice. All right, let's have a break, Pete. When we come back, we'll do some more.

Yeah, we've got to do some battery brands, of course. Battery brands. We'll do the battery brands. Don't forget to get the email ready for search, or if you want me to do it, I'll do it. And then we'll do some emails. But we're going to take a quick break first. We're back with a look at Pete Shaw,

and it's time for battery brands. What battery brands have you found in your cheap Chinese consumer electronic car? And no doubt as we hurtle towards Christmas, there'll be more and more Christmas toys, Christmas presents, Christmas marital aids being unpacked and

rammed with the very best double A's. But do let us know what the stock nonsense that's in your toy, etc., is. Because that's how it works. You read them today. I'll search them. How about that? It's probably for the best because I've got a very loud mechanical keyboard and yours is a lovely...

A little fly... You gave your everyone to that next door neighbour, did you? Ross Wilson has come in with Deanda. Love the show. Never thought I'd write an email like this, but how's this for a new player? Deanda, D-E-A-N-D-E-R, which I found in the remote control of my new DVD player.

Yes, I know who has a DVD player these days, but how else am I supposed to watch my Frasier box set? Keep on doing your thing, Ross Deanda. This is really interesting, Ross, because you sent in Deanda, as you said, Pete, D-E-A-N-D-E-R, right? Yeah. Now, in that form,

they are a new player. We've had some Deanders before sent in by our friend, let me just find out who it was, by our friend Niall back in the day, about a year and a half ago. Sorry, two and a half years ago

but that DeAnda brand was spelt D-E-A-N-D-A so slight variation so the name sounds the same but it's spelt differently so I'm delighted to say that they are a new player if not very close to another new player but listen a win's a win

Indeed Dean Peverley has come in with, wow, Gaule. G-A-U-L-E. Hello there, Luke and Pete. Long-time listener. Jimmy, you'd opened my son's light-up battle sword the other day to find these beauties inside, and I immediately thought of you two. You have no doubt this will be one of those where Luke says,

you're not getting anywhere with a Judo Super sunshine, but I thought I'd give it a shot anyway. Oh, sorry, it's Judo Super, the ones that Darren Hickey came up with. I'm sorry, I've missed it. The page moved in a weird way that I didn't mean to. So that was Darren Hickey's message, Judo Super from a light-up battle sword.

Any news, Luke, on a Judo Super? Anthony McLaughlin sent those in in September, so that is not a new player. And what was the other one? Gowley by... Gowley, G-A-O-L-E. Dean Paveley's come up with that one. I have to rightfully throw all of my daughter's toys

and electronics for random batteries. What a life. What a life, Dino. Great way to spend some time. I took the back off an Ironman Nightlight and came across three Gowley AAAs. I'm hoping it's a new player as I've set myself the hugely unrealistic target of finding a new

player before the end of the year and so far I have failed miserably. Isn't that crazy? It's like the Gaulé AAAs. It's in a Nightlight so it's obviously going to be pulling a fair bit of power. Why would you not just go for two AAs? If you've got the space for three AAAs why not just give it go for two double A's? If you've got the space for three triple A's,

why not just give it a double A capacity? It's a difficult question to answer. One, I'm not going to attempt to do so now, but what I will say is this, I'm afraid your search continues for a new player before the end of the year because Luke Pressling sent some galleys in back in September as well.

So I'm afraid not. We've got one new player there and two who have fallen just short. Unlucky. Unlucks. Unlucky, mate. Unlucky. On to the emails. We've got a message from... I'm going to go for Chris's message.

I can't remember what prompted this, but I think Luke said something the other week about how it would be cool to see every place you went to in a year. Years ago, I bought a report, bought a report from a guy who did exactly this the visualizations uh of of the data are beautiful he made a mobile phone app that would track everything about him and logged who he met and all sort of things uh you can see the report here i particularly enjoyed his frequency versus in his frequency versus intimacy chart. You two would probably score quite highly on this. Yeah, he's just done this amazing, beautiful,

stunning visualization of his entire life for a year. Most recorded word. What? Jeans. Recorded. Apparently he says jeans quite a lot. He's got places he's visited. It's amazing amazing i'd love someone to do that for me because i'm a bit of a stats geek but i think my the results for me would be very very disappointing i'm sure average hour yeah

average hour of uh average hours of sleep seven hours and 30 minutes that's pretty good isn't it oh my garmin already does that for me my garmin does that brother my average i think is around eight hours which is not bad i was really surprised actually i went away for a weekend with some mates back in july and there's five of us and i was really the only one who said that they were happy we had a conversation about it i was really the only one who said that they were happy with their sleep apparently it's a real epidemic now like people don't really get hardly any sleep these days. Computers, kids, probably helps that you read before bed rather than watch your horn and stuff.

That probably helps, doesn't it? I think I'm just lazy at heart. I think I've just forced myself to work hard, which I think I have, but I think at heart, the nature of me is to be lazy. I like sleeping. It's good.

How many hours do you get a night on average? I don't get any more than seven really usually, but especially the dogs wake me up quite a lot because they're just shits. Wonderful, hairy shits. And I wonder if a lot of men of our age have to get up at night to go to the toilet now as well. I don't.

I'm good, but a lot of people do. No, I have noticed the past, actually the past few months, a couple of months, I'm feeling like I need a bit of a wee, and then I go, and it's like, there's nothing there, really. And I'm going to be, and people will go, hmm, prostate cancer.

I'm going to be, I masturbate and have masturbated. I'm going to be fucking fuming, because they say if you masturbate every day, you don't get prostate cancer. That's not medical advice. That is medical advice. Stop it. If you keep your, day, you don't get prostate cancer. That's not medical advice. That is medical advice. Stop it. If you keep it going, if you keep that prostate going,

chances are there's going to be a reduced risk of prostate cancer. If I've got fucking prostate cancer, I'm going to be fucking fuming. You've done your best. I'm going to be fucking... You've done your very best. I've done my bit. It's just going to be like Roy Castle and his passive smoking

fucking dying of lung cancer I'm going to be on the fucking news the only the only thing you're a doctor of is fucking apple sours at the bar of an indie night and that's how it should stay

before we go let's just squeeze one more email in I want to just remind our listeners as well that we'd love to we'd love the Luke and Pete show family to get in touch

hello at lukeandpete.com with their best and worst christmases their best and worst christmas stories any kind of events that's happening around christmas so we can do a festive episode or two so please do send those in to hello at luke and peacho.com before we go this email from arno which i really like uh he says hi chap second time emailer although he doesn't leave uh informational details of what his first email was about, it doesn't matter. He says, you guys recently spoke about fry-ups, English breakfast, the do's and don'ts, and the potential demise of the humble, full English breakfast.

I couldn't not draw your attention to a man that is not going down without a fight. He's bagging the fry-up drum via a cafe review page he runs on Instagram. Hanging from the Streatham region, your neck of the woods, I believe, Luke. It absolutely is, just down the road from me. The town fryer spends his weekend morning scouring the local vicinity for proper caffs, judging the good, the bad and the ugly, taking the cholesterol bullets

so his readers don't have to. He truly is the Jay Rayner of the fry-up scene, if you will. The page is well worth a look. See below, I've attached a winning English breakfast and a losing English breakfast. Maybe a source of local inspiration for Luke too. Love the show as always.

Viva la bacon. Now, that's interesting. Having said what I said about Instagram earlier this week, I mean, that's a nice, interesting, original use of it, I think. He does reviews. He gives the marks out of five. He does all the kind of stuff that you'd expect. But the thing that really caught my eye was the two examples

that Arno has helpfully included in his email, which show a winning fry-up and a losing one, to me, look exactly the same. Exactly the same. I cannot see what the discrepancy is in the marking, and maybe you can, Pete. No, I mean, I just can't sort of figure it out yeah i can't figure it out i don't know whether uh the attendance of the the bacon is it just

differently fried bacon a different cut of bacon i cannot figure it out what what is so special about one over the other yeah it's difficult to say i had a very good um english breakfast in so you know this is going to sound really pompous but bear with me so you know i went up to cartmel went to simon rogan's restaurant he's got another restaurant in the town that he puts breakfast on at for people who stay at his hotel and you get it as part of the hotel room and it's called rogan and co and and a lot of times to be honest i personally think it's a little overrated there's a lot of kind of shit going on just a lot of stuff that you don't necessarily want to be eating for breakfast it's quite challenging and i don't think that's what breakfast really should be

um that might be just me being fussy but but there you have it but one of the times i went there that he did like he did like an english breakfast and he kept it super simple and it was really beautiful cuts of meat and really nicely done and the egg wasn't fried it was like confit back in the shell and all that kind of crap. But it was actually really delicious. And that's the best English breakfast I think I've had. I find the ones you get at the old greasy spoons, I tend to avoid them.

I'd rather go for a, probably go for a scrambled eggs on toast with maybe a bit of bacon. Do you know what I mean? It's just too much. It's swimming in fat and grease. And, you know, you and I aren't getting any younger, Pete. I think this guy who's doing the town fryer Instagram page is too much. It's swimming in fat and grease. And, you know, you and I aren't getting any younger, Pete. I think this guy who's doing the town fryer Instagram page

is taking a lot of fucking, a big hit for the team. I mean, look, I started my day by eating pizza, so don't worry about that, mate. Don't worry about what I want to. You're the only person, you're the only or main person I know of

that doesn't apply any rules to different meals of the day. Well, I think because i love uh japan uh you know i'm always fucking yapping on about japan they have like mackerel and rice for breakfast and i'm like i can why do we have to limit ourselves to not eating pizza in the morning you know people sort of talk about it obviously yeah as as a great hangover cure and stuff it's delicious the next day it is delicious the next day if you heat it up properly and maybe put a bit of uh you know turn it into eggy bread as i've said before with a bit cinnamon and uh and syrup but um fundamentally it like why can't we just have this on a wednesday why can't we eat pizza in the morning on a wednesday i think i think

there's a definite element of truth in the fact that we are a nation of rules and perhaps we're too straight-jacketed. But I just don't see how that's a great, nutritious start to the day. Leftover pizza fried in cinnamon and fucking syrup. No, but my favourite cereal is some unspeakable double chocolate monstrosity from Marks and Spencer's. That's a fucking dessert as your first meal in the morning. It's horrible, but delicious.

I always have porridge with blueberries and honey every morning. Yeah, that's what Sarah has. It always looks nice, but I'm like, is it going to give me stomach pains at one o'clock in the afternoon? That's what I want.

It fills you up. It's weird because it does both things. It fills you up and you genuinely aren't hungry until lunchtime, but at the same time, it's still also a little bit underwhelming. It's a bit like, oh, go to sleep. Do you know what I want. It fills you up. It's weird because it does both things. It fills you up and you genuinely aren't hungry until lunchtime. But at the same time, it's still also a little bit underwhelming. It's a bit like,

oh, go to the corner. Do you know what I mean? This is like ordering a burger in a restaurant. It's like, my wife calls it a panic burger. If I don't know what I want, I always just order a burger.

Yeah, correct. It's a bit like that. So anyway, listen, Pete, thank you very much to Arno for emailing. Thank you to all of our emailers. Much appreciated. We want your Christmas stories. Thank you to all of our emailers. Much appreciated. We want your Christmas stories. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com.

We'll work our way through those in the weeks leading up to Christmas. This has been Thursday's Luke and Pete Show. We hope you've enjoyed it. If you have done, you can catch up with us on social media at Luke and Pete Show. And you can leave us a review on Apple Pods or wherever you get your podcasts. Leave us a five star. You're always very generous on there. We appreciate it. It helps other people find the show

and also gives two old men a little self-esteem boost as well. And what could be wrong with that? What's wrong with that? There's nothing wrong with that. It's fine. There's nothing wrong with that. Until next time. Ta-ta. Ta-ta.