The Luke and Pete Show - Paranormal activity in the shed

Episode Date: September 27, 2021

Has Pete bought a set of walkie talkies to use down the shed so he doesn't need to spend quite as much time in the house? Yes, yes he has. And that can only be good news for the Luke and Pete Show, let's be honest. But what's this? One of the walkie talkies appears to be haunted? Ooooooooh, tell us more Donny...PS: We also find some time to talk about a man who had a bike ride to remember and Mick Fleetwood. [e-mail] is the destination for all of your stories! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the LukaPitcher It is Monday And as I say at this junk show After the weekend I do hope you've had a good one Yeah I hope you've kept safe I hope you're not in the hospital

I hope you're not in the ICU, yeah? Don't be working all the time Don't be working Switch off, yeah? Take a week off. Maybe. Email your manager or ring them up and say, no. Do it now.

No more. Do it now. Just go, no. Because the real success are the friends we make along the way. Aren't they? Yes. Apologies to you if you're working shifts and you have to work the weekend. I'll have you get a weekend elsewhere in the week

it's convenient there's less traffic true yeah listen if your weekend's a Wednesday and a Thursday for instance yeah don't worry about

being busy at the shops yeah another tip from me don't try and drive from Houston in central London to Essex on a Friday afternoon don't just

don't drive in central London generally don't do it mate don't do it anyway. Don't do it. No. How do you feel, Peter? I mean,

I think this is a good time of the year to be talking about this. How do you feel about the changing of the seasons? The advent of autumn upon us?

I don't feel like I've had much of a summer, but when you're in this studio quite a lot, it does get very oppressively hot. So I'm looking forward to it cooling down a little bit in that respect.

I mean, it seems weird that we pay rent for an office building and there's no air con in it. You're having a pop at the man, are you? Yes, I am. You're using this as a vehicle to have a pop at the man. Yes, I am. No air con in the building. Very strange.

Very bizarre. When people say to me, what's this show about? I say it's a vehicle to have a pop at the man. To get things off our chest but that's quite a boring answer because you're talking about just remote

entirely related to work I don't have any romance for any particular season you live by the ocean now I do live by the Billy Ocean now it's not like I can jump

in the ocean can I because it'd be too cold get out of my dreams ding ding ding ding get into my car imagine Billy Ocean's life. I think he comes from somewhere in Essex, I want to say. At Basildon or something.

And he was like Mr. 80s in the US. He was so famous. He did so many great songs. So apparently he was born in Trinidad and Tobago, but he made his home in Romford. There you go, Romford. I knew it was that place. And it's funny you mention that

because I always think about Mick Fleetwood being from a rural part of Cornwall. Because Mick Fleetwood, like in the 70s, remember when they're making Rumours?

Classic record. Yeah. Like, you know. Bigger than Jesus, like huge band. Huge. The story,

the possibly apocryphal tale of Rumours is that when they checked the midweeks, it had sold 4 million records. Right. It did like 8.5 million its first week.

Like, it's a ridiculous level. I don't know if it's ever been beaten, I don't know if that's the record still, but at that point, it was like an astonishing amount of, yeah, amount of records to be selling.

And clearly it's about, it's an autobiographical record about the various myriad relationships within the band, people breaking up, and a huge amount of cocaine, right? And obviously, high quality cocaine, because they're recording in the 70s in LA or whatever. The very best. Yeah, and I just think that that's a long way from Mick Fleetwood being from quite a small town in Cornwall. How does that happen?

It's more that I will have told this story before on the podcast, but probably not for the last couple of months. He turned up at my old radio station, and in the lift, he got a puppet out of his pocket that was of Mick Fleetwood. I like that. And made him talk to one of the producers. I like that.

And he also said to a presenter who was interviewing him, you're very tall. Like, Mick Flitwood is fucking tall. Like, yeah. Tallest man in rock, maybe? Yeah, probably. And then he said, he kept on trying to get the runner to get him a bottle of wine.

Give me a bottle of wine. Yeah. And he went, get us a bottle, get us a Riesling, Riesling, Riesling, whatever. Yeah. Get us a bottle of wine. And his wife went, do not give us a bottle of wine. Get us a Riesling, Riesling, Riesling, whatever. Get us a bottle of wine. And his wife went, do not get him a bottle of wine. And then he said, right, let's all go to the pub.

And she went, you can't go to the pub. You've got dinner tonight. And he goes, who with? He goes, your family. He went, oh, shit. It's just, even at that age, having the best time. Apart from having dinner with his family. Yeah.

He doesn't enjoy it. Do you know he estimated that he in total had snorted 70 miles of cocaine? Right, okay, yeah. And I love the math of that. I wouldn't want to see a shit massive guy, and he's just emptying himself out with cocaine. Wow. I want to know the mathematics of that,

because he's probably estimating quite a large amount of that. I understand. How thin's the line? You know, if you... I want the width. If you transpose... Yeah, you transpose it across the beers, you could probably...

If it's a big session, back in the day when you're into that kind of thing. You're getting like eight or nine. Yeah, but you're sketchy. Yes. You're never going to know. No. I mean, you're not really going to know.

I'm always like, if I'm feeling feeling absolute twaddle the next day I'm going I only had like three drinks and then I think back and go

no I had seven I had way more the trick is to avoid beer I think for me the trick is to avoid beer the point anyway the point being

I think with Mick on that fact I think you've got to times it by one and a half yes yeah but but then they come in I suppose it comes in grams doesn't it on that fact, I think you've got to times it by one and a half. Yes. Yeah. But then they come in,

I suppose it comes in grams, doesn't it? You know how many you've had, I guess. I mean, he's not measuring out with a ruler the average length. No, he's not. And as you say, we haven't even talked about width. I just think that you're right about Billy Ocean because nothing sounds less like Romford than Billy Ocean.

Than when the going gets tough. And nothing sounds less like Romford than Billy Ocean. Than when the going gets tough. And nothing sounds less like... Get out of my dreams, get in my car, lover boy. Caribbean queen. Yeah. Clearly he's got influence from the fact that he's from the Caribbean originally. But with Mick,

nothing sounds less like Red Ruth Cornwall than like Gold Dust Woman on like Rumours. He doesn't say anything like it. Now I know he's not written those songs and he's just a drummer on some of them but the point being it's kind of I'd just love to have

been around when they were making that shit I'd love to have been around when Ronald Stones were making Exile on Main Street in that massive chateau

where people were just coming and going and you know they would be there making a record but like for three months they would just do nothing partying yeah

yeah wow it's just very much like the early days of the Ramble well I think nowadays artists very much have to constantly

they never stop but back in the day you could get away with not doing quite so much touring record company money back then if you were a big recording artist in the 70s and 80s

that's it you're making so much weight it's done it's very hard for you to make money now right very difficult unless you're a kind of, you know, you're an Ed Sheeran or an Adele or whatever.

But maybe that's always been the case. I don't think it has though because I feel like some bands in the 70s and 80s who maybe we wouldn't even heard of made a very good living out of music. Yeah. No, completely agree.

Completely agree. Good stuff. Anyway, Peter, what are we going to talk about this week? Are we going to talk about, because you've just, I've seen a note in the running order

from you saying you have ghosts in your walkie talkie now I didn't even know you had a walkie talkie so you need more than one of them for the work right

yeah so I in my unlovable little cabin down the end of the garden I have got talk us through the set up cabin

end of the garden is that where your studio is that's where the studio is oh I thought that was in the bedroom in the house. No, no, no, no. It was just a big cabin and it was used for like a... Size of this place here? So the main room would

probably be a little bit bigger than this room. Yeah, you're probably right. But then I've made a smaller little kind of part that's now the studio. The masturbation corner. The masturbation corner. Well, I don't have blinds so I couldn't get up. That's the kind of thing. I've thought about it. And so I'm out in the cabin

and I'm just doing my stuff. And so my partner I have access to needs to talk to me, but she obviously doesn't want to. I mean, it might be raining. It's miserable to sort of walk in the garden just to talk to the person you profess to love how many paces

profess to love I don't know 20 paces or something 15 paces I just want to get a picture it's like a patio thing imagine it's like this American life

it's raining it's raining and so I said right so I got us some cheap walkie talkies don't tell me

please do not tell me that you and the partner you have access to have walkie-talkies to communicate when you're in the cabin at the bottom of the garden. Yes, at the bottom of the garden, yeah. So she can talk to me, right? But I leave it, obviously I leave an open channel so that she can just pick up the walkie-talkies

and go, Peter, your tea's ready, et cetera, et cetera. Like a child. Yeah. But every now and again during the evening, a fucking voice just appears. You're probably just picking up a police channel or something. No, I caught him.

Anybody look your ears up, Channel 8 tonight. This is AT station at Medway. All right. Anybody look your ears up, Channel 8 tonight. This is AT station at Medway. Putting out a general call.

Anyone look your ears up. Come back. Huh. It's like a CB operator. One of those enthusiasts. He's in Medway, whatever he is. But he's saying, I'm on Channel 8. So it's over the estuary.

It's over the river, which is incredible. Miles away. And he's like, anyone else on Channel 8? And I have replied back going, hello? And he never says anything back. He's a CB enthusiast, mate. I anything back but he's a CB enthusiast mate I don't think it is a CB enthusiast I think it's something

maybe something to do with shipping I don't know he said if there's anyone out there let's get in touch if anybody could decipher what the guy said I just couldn't understand what he was doing

but he's in Medway and he's just saying this is just a general call and I replied and he didn't reply back did I not say over did I not say breaker breaker what's the

I think he actually says the word breaker so maybe he is a CB guy but why channel 8 out of all of the channels? And as This American Life would say and why was there

a shipwreck at Leon C that night after you'd done your thing? It's so spooky though. That is weird. The first time you heard that must have been a bit of a shock. Yeah.

Well I didn't hear it my friend heard it and went who's that bloke who's just talking in your kitchen on your little walkie-talkie? I was like, what?

I thought it was just interference but the guy's saying I'm on Channel 8 and I'm on Channel 8. Can't you just change your channel? Yeah, but then

there might be someone on Channel 9. How many channels are there? Ten channels. Just ten? Frightening. Yeah. Wow.

The Channel 8 ghost. The Channel 8 ghost. I mean, I'll be honest, he doesn't sound that threatening. No, he seems quite friendly. He sounds like he lives on his own. Why doesn't he fucking reply to me when I'm saying hello?

He probably didn't use the right words. So, if anyone's got any suggestions about what the hell is going on there, but he's in Medway. I mean, this is just fascinating for a number of different reasons. One, that you communicate with your partner that you have access to by CB radio.

Yeah. How much do you pay for the walkie-talkies? 25 quid. Very cheap. Should they be picking up that far away? Apparently so. Maybe they're just weirdly powerful. I don't know about this, so forgive me if this is a stupid question.

Does that mean there's no one closer than that speaking on that channel on a CB Radio walkie-talkie anywhere in your town? Well, I don't know. I've not heard him. It's just that guy. So I would hate know. I've not heard him. It's just that guy. So I would hate everyone who's talking on Channel 8. I didn't realise that,

you know, Channel 8 was like a famous kind of UHF frequency. Is it UHF? I think it might be UHF. It's got to be, hasn't it? Imagine if you heard like a murder.

Why would somebody be broadcasting their murder on a channel 8? Well, you left yours on the fucking kitchen. Yeah, but you've got to press the button. Okay. Push to talk yeah

it's weird it's a weird throwback yeah it really is because he I mean if that guy is so desperate to talk to people and make contact

and have online friends or whatever use the internet brother use the internet wait until he's about the internet it's Medwin isn't it

it's mine it'll be primary you're a part of it now. So yeah, keep us posted. Yeah, I might play some music down there. I'll sort of go, hello, how are you doing? What's going on? Try and make contact with him.

What are you wearing? Age, sex, location. That's what people used to say on the old MSN. Did you used to use MSN? Yeah, yeah, a little bit, here and there. What was your username? Well, brandman3000, obviously. Was it?

Yep. Brandman3000. Brandman3000. What a blast in the past that is. Only had one song. That's incorrect, but carry on. Drinking in LA was their song, wasn't it? They did a cover of Come and Feel the Noise,

so have some respect. Did that make it on their album? They did. Their second album was, they led with a single called Astounded, which is quite good. A bit of a disco number. Very nice.

I've typed in Bran Van 2000 by accident. So apparently they had four albums, one released in 2010. They're very Quebecian. They're very sort of like, you've had your hit, now get back to Canada. So what album is Drinking in LA on? That's the first one, Glee.

Wow. Come on, feel the noise. Couch Surfing. 1997. Absolute bangers. Come on, feel the noise. Couch surfing. 1997. Absolute bangers. Come on, feel the noise. It has not done very well with age, to be quite frank.

It's not great. Well, Absolute Radio 90 is occasionally plagiarised and it's a great tune to hear. It's a play every bloody day. I used to be on it. Well, only once, though. No repeat guarantee.

Yeah, on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Yeah. We didn't say we didn't repeat the songs during the days. And what was your primary use of MSN? You used to just chat to your pals or you meet new people? Yeah, I think so, yeah. How do you meet new people? They needed to be on your contact list, didn't they?

Yeah, I think it doesn't really matter. I guess you could only get in touch with the people that you knew, but forums, I was on a few forums back in the day. Oh, yeah? It sounds more niche and nefarious than it actually is. It's just people who like video games really and the TV show 24.

You're part of a 24 forum? Loved a bit of 24. Charlie Brooker was talking the other day, I read an interview of him at one of the weekend newspapers and I don't really know, part of the reason I read it

is because I was excited so I thought maybe he's bringing back Black Mirror but he's not, he's got a new series. And he was saying that the most thrilling part of any job he's had is when he was doing

Screen Wipe or whatever the first iteration of it oh actually before Screen Wipe when he was doing The Guardian Guide yes

he said that he would get the tapes for 24 cents to him ahead of time oh lovely and no one else could watch them that is enjoyable

and it would be couriered like high security couriered to him on DVD or whatever the fuck it was. Nice. And it was just amazing to be able to watch them and know that you were the only person watching them

because obviously it was before the internet properly kicked off. Incredible, right? That was an incredible job. They administer, it's quite interesting actually, I only learned this quite recently, but video game reviewers,

they, or certainly previewers, they get early builds of games but it's delivered in a kind of only learned this quite recently but video game reviewers they are certainly previewers um they get early builds of games but it's delivered in a kind of streaming service right so like a high security thing like steam but you're no because you're on it's more like stadia are you familiar with that yes a system somewhere in the ether are doing all the doing all the graphical processes and the input um processing stuff, and you're just getting fed a video feed, but you've got control and you kind of, you know, it goes up

the chute and it refreshes it every millisecond or whatever. It's a really interesting way of administering preview bills, because it just means that they don't have to deliver anything, they don't have to make sure that your system is compatible. They've already got the systems, they've already got it so it doesn't crash and stuff.

The question on everyone's lips is how into 24 were you? I liked it. I had the little on my mobile phone. I've never seen it. You've never seen 24? No.

Have a word with yourself. You've watched The Sopranos twice and you've not watched any 24? Three times The Sopranos. Good God. I watched an episode last night actually. Don't worry about you, sunshine. But what were the topics of conversation on the forum, though?

Do you like extracurricular illegal torture techniques? Extra judicial interrogation techniques. Do you like them? Was it seen as being a bit kind of passe to be a big Jack Bauer fan? Yeah, everyone was a Tony Almeida fan, which was kind of his sidekick. Can I just embarrassingly say

that I don't even know what it's about? Well, it's... He's a... Well, it's all kind of... It was post 9-11. Terrorists are taking over. They're going to explode

a dirty bomb or whatever. And Jack Bauer was the FBI slash whatever agent. Is that why you've got a walkie-talkie? I've got a walkie-talkie. You wanted to be like Jack Bauer? the FBI slash whatever agent. Is that why you got a walkie talkie? You wanted to be like Jack Bauer? Yeah. What, he would always follow the plots? Say again? He would always follow the plots, yeah. But it would always be like... 24 episodes

in an hour each? Yeah. But it would always be... Is it a real time show? But it would always be... Not really, I mean, he's got adverts. He just goes for a piss when he owns the adverts. Has some dinner. But he within a day he managed to get off

get off the brown remember that he was undercover in Afghanistan and he had to prove that he was a cool gangster to

like a real criminal so he got addicted to heroin I bet all the masterminds are all addicted to heroin yeah fucking hell and then he's like

but he had a really posh shooting up kit. Like it was like, because he couldn't be sitting and just be using a dirty old needle.

He had this silver inject, silver needle, hypodermic syringe and stuff like that. Did you talk about that on the forum? Yeah, he was, what cool kit he's

got to take drugs. What were you using though? Oh, I don't know. It probably would have just been my name to be honest, but, or maybe Brandon 3000, I just don't know. It probably would have just been my name, to be honest. Or maybe Branvan 3000.

I just do not know. One size catches all with Branvan 3000. So you're a big Macy Gray man and a big Branvan man. Macy Gray, Branvan 3000. Who's the other one? Who did the song Confessions of a Cowgirl? Do you remember her? Confessions of a Cowgirl?

What was her name? Confessions of a Cowgirl. Oh was her name? Of a cowgirl. Oh, no. It wasn't that. It wasn't that. It was something of a cowgirl, but she was like a singer. Imani Coppola. Remember Imani Coppola?

No. It's so random. Just any one hit wonder. The three biggest heartaches of your late 90s for you were Ram Ram 3000, Macy Gray, and Imani Coppola.

I've never heard of her. It's so funny. Yeah. Alright Peter let's have a little break and you can show me the 24 forum see if it's still up

and when we come back we'll do an email or two. How about that? Okie dokie then. See you soon. Ta ta. It's the Luke and Pete show. Is it as good as

Imani Coppola's debut album Chupacabra? We'll never know. Chupacabra is the It's like a spooky horror Show. Is it as good as Imani Coppola's debut album Chupacabra? We'll never know. Chupacabra is the... It's like a spooky horror thing, isn't it? A mythical... A mythical beast. Yeah, a mythical beast.

A wee mythical beast. That every society has a story about, right? It's a creature believed through some parts of the Americas to drink the blood of livestock. I mean, we all do that, don't we? I have black pudding. Isn't it? I've got haggis in the fridge. Yeah. I suppose if you eat a steak, I mean, you're having the blood of livestock. I mean, we all do that, don't we? I have black pudding. Isn't it? I've got haggis in the fridge. Yeah. I suppose if you eat a steak,

I mean, you're having the blood of livestock, really. True. Oh, I had a big meat fest last night. I saw the picture of it. And can I just say before you get into it, because you are probably going to try and sell it into our listeners. Mate.

I was lucky enough, if that's the right word, to see a photo of it. And I'll tell you exactly what it was. I'm going to bring up the photo now. It was a picture of a massive frying pan, possibly a wok, with a load of doner kebab meat in it, the occasional piece of cucumber in the frying pan,

some pickled cabbage and onions. And the frying pan is massive and completely full it was massive I couldn't finish it all where did you buy such a large quantity because I had mates staying at 3 o'clock

in the morning I delivered a load of kebabs and they'd gone to bed I kind of half fell asleep when the guy turned up so this is leftover kebabs

this is leftover kebab meat from the night before ok and how are you feeling afterwards surprisingly fine I'm as surprised as you are I know right it'll happen on the holiday left over kebab meat from the night before. Okay, and how are you feeling afterwards? Surprisingly fine. I'm as surprised as you are. I know, right? It'll happen on the holiday.

The Sunday night Chinese replacement, that. Yeah, I thought, you know what, because I had a, oh my God, fucking guy

in the shop, in the pub I was in. This young kid was delivering everyone's food and I went for the lamb, other people went for beef whatever

oh you're having a Sunday lunch having a Sunday lunch having a roast and he comes over he says here's the beef here's the chicken and he goes

here's your beef and I said I actually ordered lamb and you know me I would have just you'd be fine you'd rather go in the kitchen

and cook it all yourself and do all the washing up and even cause a problem exactly sorry mate I think mine was lamb and he sort of waited and do all the washing up and even cause a problem. Exactly. Exactly. So I said, oh, sorry, man. I think mine was a lamb. And he sort of waited and sort of looked at me and sort of go, as if to go, I mean, it's just fucking same thing, though, isn't it?

Don't worry about it. And yeah. And so he thought about it again. He said, okay, I'll take it back. So he went back. Yeah. I said, sorry to be a bother. He came back again and he said, sir, here's your beef.

Right. And I was like and I was like I was like I'm definitely you're in it now I'm in it now definitely know that I'm in it he's fucked off

came back again with the same plate yeah sir here's your lamb yeah and I was like he just changed the word that's all he's done

I couldn't I was trying to figure out what the joke was why he refused to get me lamb, and whether he's a naughty boy or he was just a boy fearful for his job. So I was just like... What's your assessment?

I think he's a naughty boy, Luke. I think he's one of you lot. I think he's just trying to get away with it. Just kind of, don't give a shit about the job. I'll just do whatever. And because of politeness, terrible anxiety-ridden politeness, I won't get in trouble for it. If that was me as politeness, terrible anxiety ridden politeness,

I won't get in trouble for it. If that was me as the waiter, every time you sent me back, I'd have eaten one of your ass potatoes. I know, that's what I mean! That's what I mean. So what did you end up with? I just ate a load of beef, turns out. Could have been lamb, could have been beef, I don't know. You should be able to tell. Yeah, I should be able to tell. It felt like beef to me. Okay, so he's just...

He's just had me over. So it happened three times, and he went, Sir, here's your beef. Second one, he's just He's had me over. So it happened three times. He went Sir, here's your beef. Second one Here's your beef. And he went, third one, hello sir Here's your lamb. Yeah, okay. You've beaten beef. You've beaten beef there. I've beaten beef there, yeah. Is it any good?

It was alright. So that's why you had to order a load of lamb kebabs that night. That's enough lamb. The burning hole in your soul where the lamb should have been. Anyway. Anyway. Emails.

Emails. Let's do an email. I forgot whether we're going into a break or coming out of a break. No, we're at one. Into the break. Into the break was Jack Bauer.

The thing is, that's all the boring stuff. I actually agree with, you know me, I'm a big fan of Danny Kelly, but I actually agree with Danny Baker on this specific issue only.

Okay. Which is that all the shit that people go mad about in radio, you have to do this and you have to do that, that is all the boring shit. Yes. Isn't it?

Yeah. Like, don't say the name of the song, just say the answer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And make sure you fucking name shit the station three times an hour. Fuck off.

That is crap though, isn't it? Well, especially in the name of, you know, radio readouts name of, you know, radio readouts. Like, you know what station you're listening to. Why do people do that? It's Chris Country.

I've always listened to Chris Country. Christian Country. Chris Country, mate. Anyway, who's emailed in? Oh yes, Arno. Great name, Arno. Arno.

So, I mean, for those who aren't familiar with the name Arno, I'm going to say French Arnold. Right, okay. Arno. Arno. Arnold, but French.

Yeah, okay, fair. But he's emailed in English. Crucially. And that's why it's being read out. Arno says, this is a great story. A very, very good story. I've been excited for it.

I've been holding it back. But here we go. Long time listener. First time emailer. You're very welcome along, Arno. On the back of recent bike trips chat, I thought I'd chip in with a story of my own. We've had two or three interesting stories about very resourceful young people

listening to this show, going on bike trips with their friends. Now, I've never done that. And I feel like now I've missed out a bit. Maybe I should have done it when I was younger, but I didn't. And I know Pete, you haven't either. You can ride a bike though, right?

I can ride a bike. Yeah, all good. Anyway, Arno says, about five years ago, age 24, me and my mate decided we'd cycle to France. More of a default option as I was too skint to go skiing and my parents have a place there,

so we'd be able to do it on the cheap. And we set off on the first leg from southwest London to Portsmouth to catch the ferry the next morning. Big shout out to the Ibis Budget Fratton Park. Very nice. You stayed there, haven't you, Pete? Yes, I have. You have stayed there. Out of 10? It's where

I'll commit suicide. Okay. Out of 10, that's a maximum of a 6. That's the case. On the other side, said Arno, things went relatively well apart from a few navigation issues including choosing to ignore our recommended route and opt for an as the crow flies, or in our case, as the

lorries drive uh route over the saint nazareth saint nazaire bridge um anyway we made it engorged ourselves on wine and cheese for a few days before heading back having made it to the port town of saint marlo and killing some time before boarding the return ferry i remembered i promised a mate i'd get in some cheap cigars so i went into a newsagents and bought some as well as a couple of scratch cards with the change. Fast forward to the ferry bar, and I scratch the first one. Nothing. I scratch the second

and do a double take. I consider my French to be good enough to understand the rules of the game, and so I say to my mate, I'm pretty sure I've just won 30,000 euros. Sacre bleu. He went absolutely nuts, while I remain in a weird trance. I then confirmed with a French waitress who let out

a whimper as confirmation, and we swiftly ordered some more beers. I was pretty sceptical still, though. I thought perhaps I hadn't understood the rules, there might be some kind of loophole about me not being a French resident. To add to my uncertainty, we were floating around in the middle of the channel and heading back to England, so I had no way of verifying.

I had to wait an excruciating three weeks for my parents to return to France and take the scratch card back to the newsagents who, after getting the manager, confirmed the jackpot. Such a wonderful message to receive while working in my very poorly paid job at the time, subsequently allowing me to move out of my parents' house

and go to the World Cup in Russia. Now that is not investing for your future. That is and go to the World Cup in Russia. Now that is not investing for your future. That is just going to the World Cup in Russia. It's free money, isn't it? He says, to this day, the craziest thing that's ever happened to me. Thank you for all the laughs and begamblerware.org. Cheers, Arno. Good luck to you, Arno.

That's brilliant. Well done. Oh, fantastic. If I ever won the lottery, no one would ever know. If I ever won a scratch card, no one would ever know because I wouldn't tell anyone else, I think. The trick, I actually think the trick with winning a jackpot like that is to actually treat it with no respect

because it's taking no respect to earn it. Yes. So if you think I've won 10 million. So walk in on your desk and go, give me a fucking lottery ticket, cunt. No, I don't mean it like that. Right. I just mean that if you build up a business

and sell it for millions and you end up as millions as a part of it, you understand the work that went into earning that money. You respect it. It's no different to when Jeff Goldblum talked about them bringing dinosaurs back in Jurassic Park. It's taken you no respect, no kind of discipline to attain it.

You don't know what you're dealing with. You can't deal with the seismic nature of what you've just achieved. So you might as well treat it quite frivolously and expect to live your life completely as you would before. That's the best way of approaching it. Otherwise you get a Michael Carroll on your hand. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, I guess so. Michael Carroll treated it with no respect, did he? That's what I'm saying. No, but he thought that it would change his life. He couldn't deal with it. He didn't. He just bought more ATVs he bought a massive track outside the back of his house

and raced cars around it I mean and then lost his family why did he lose his family? I just think it was yeah issues it always creates problems doesn't it

but like yeah but like I think that if I had if anybody had a load of money you know inexplicably and very quickly it would just be great

if they did just get a little track outside their house and just drive cars around that's exciting it's also Michael Carroll the so called

lottery lout the lottery lout is a very quaint thing looking back now yes 2002 the big story of 2002 Michael Carroll wins

9.7 million on the national lottery that is a lot of money isn't it oh yeah even for a lottery lout that's amazing that he managed to spend

well he only became the lottery lout later right and he called himself the self-proclaimed king of the chavs but he had all sorts of issues

bless him he's now a Coleman he tried to he's a Coleman now is he yeah so he tried to follow all the financial advice

that they gave him and stuff and then he had a he had a celebrity now, is he? Yeah. So he tried to follow all the financial advice that they gave him and stuff. And then he had a, he had a celebrity boxing match with a guy from Gladiators. Which should have been a, should have been an alarm bell. He got given an ASBO as well.

Yeah. He spent all his money on, apparently, according to him, in 2006, so just four years later, he'd spent all his money on new homes,

drugs, parties, jewellery, and cars. Yeah, so there we go. in 2006 so just four years later he'd spent all his money on new homes drugs parties jewellery and cars yeah yeah so there we go I'll just I mean you'd

as soon as you get the win you're flattered to buy that's the first thing you do you take your because it's where tasteless people live and you just get out to buy have a weekend there

come back get out of your system have a weekend there come back get out of your system have a weekend buy a big bottle of champagne big bottle of Grey Goose vodka in a nightclub do some drugs and come home

that's what you do that's what you do why people don't have to do drugs to have a good time Pete yeah booze it's a drug

drugs are a drug you weren't taking drugs on the 24 forum were you I was well no because Jack Bauer was doing it. Jack Bauer was taking heroin, so I didn't have to. That's what I'm saying.

Ah, so it's like a vicarious thing. It is. Yeah. I'm sorry for Michael Carroll. I'm just saying, be careful what you wish for. Arno seems like a very well-balanced man. His sentence structure is very good. His grammar is excellent.

It's clearly not affected him. He probably had a really good time at the Russian World Cup. I'm reading between the lines. I'm thinking he's probably half French. So he had a great time probably because of what transpired. Probably half English, mate. Come on.

Have some respect. English to the semi-final. And then, yeah, that's good on him. That's what I say. Yeah. That is what I say. Yeah, well done, mate. What's the biggest thing you've ever won?

I won £25 to spend in Asda when I was about eight for drawing a tree. You shouldn't be giving financial prizes to eight-year-olds. What do you mean? It was like a gift voucher, but I went to Tesco's and they put my picture up in the Tesco's or Asda or whatever. I think it was an Asda

and it was it was in a weird place as well it was in like Cataric or something it was a really weird where is Cataric compared to where you were it's got out in the sticks

it's like quite a quite a distance it wasn't my local Asda put it that way why didn't the local Asda do it yeah very weird but I drew a lovely tree

in the snow and they really liked it so I yeah I got the I drew a lovely tree in the snow and they really liked it. So I spent a load of money. I bought Ghostbusters as a video game on the Amstrad. Great purchase. Arno wants to take a leaf out of your book. That's a great purchase. Forget your welcome in Russia.

Buy an Amstrad CPC 464 game. Did you have that Dave Thompson game? Yeah, and that's the thing that annoyed me about when Sir Clive Sinclair did you have that Daley Thompson game yeah and that's the thing that annoyed me about when Sir Clive Sinclair died quite recently

Daley Thompson decathlon was trending rather than Sir Clive Sinclair did Daley not say anything did he have any warm words for

Clive's family he was too busy waggling his joystick he was too busy having a waggle brilliant so good alright let's get out of here

we'll be back on Thursday for a battery brand or two some more of this nonsense and some of your stories as well so make sure you get in touch hello at lukeandpete show dot com we bloody love talking to you today

thank you for listening very excited as ever maybe more walkie talkie stories on Thursday fingers crossed we'll find out what that man's up to maybe I'll take them on holiday

see what's going on seriously you should pitch that to This American Life there's a man in my house they love that. Yeah, there's a man in my house. They love that kind of stuff. There's a man in my house that'll be called. And people think

it's a massive crime, but it's not. It's a walkie-talkie, man. They'll tell a story and it'll take 40 minutes and it'll just be one sentence. I mean, people in glass houses,

Luke, you shouldn't. It's the way we carry on on this podcast. That is actually true. But the thing is, we're more honest. We're honest about it, yeah.

We don't ask for the advertising revenue. We just don't. I the thing is, we're more honest. We're honest about it. Yeah, we don't ask for the advertising revenue. We just don't. I fucking knew. All right, let's go. See you on Thursday. Have a good week. This was a Stack Production

and part of the Acast Creative Network.