The Luke and Pete Show - Sniffer dogs are taking over

Episode Date: October 5, 2020

With grand piano and candelabra on hand, Luke and Pete talk pop culture divas. There’s also more chat about unnervingly effective sniffer dogs - and what exactly would Pete sniff out if he had a more powerful nose. Pete also tells of his extremely unlucky quest for a drink and the boys discuss some more cracking dildo-themed emails. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to the Luke and Pete show. It is Monday the 5th of October. How the Jerry hell has this happened? We're heading towards Christmas Luke, what's going on mate? Yeah for me, October is when you first start contemplating the prospect of Christmas, isn't it? Yeah, or just thinking about coats you're going to wear, reasons you're going to wear them, where you're going to wear them, maybe thinking about getting a new coat. Actually, this is around the time that I put my winter coat on, realised

I've got a load of spare change and money from last year, and I feel a little bit flush. Do you know what I'm thinking about? Yeah, what are you thinking about? I'm thinking about your love, tonight, today, and always. You're in a really singing mood. You started singing DJ Otzi at the start of the record before I kicked begin.

All the classics. Yeah, so you've gone from the sublime to the ridiculous, haven't you? I was talking to you, wasn't I, about the Elvis impersonator that my great aunt had for her surprise birthday. Yeah. The full gamut of Elvis experiences from him turning up as a surprise, looking amazing, to him doing his second set of the night dressed in a fat suit

and a jumpsuit to do the later latter day Elvis. And then the... Wearing a lair. Does he wear a lair at any point? Wear a what? A lair. You know, those like Hawaiian kind of... Oh, he didn't wear one of those. No, sadly not. No, he didn't. Is that what it's called? I didn't know that's what they A layer. You know, there's like Hawaiian kind of. Oh, he didn't wear one of those.

No, sadly not. No, he didn't. Is that what it's called? No, that's what they were called. Yeah.

And it's the joke, like get laid. I'm going to get laid. Ha ha. And the piece de resistance, Pete, was me walking down the street after seeing him load all this stuff back into the back of his car, wearing a tracksuit.

So still with the haircut. Nice. Look. On to the next job baby I saw I was watching I'm going to be recording some WrestleMes later on and I was watching

a I think Wrestlemania 32 they did like a compendium of old Wrestlemanias and obviously Liberace was at a couple of Wrestlemanias

and there was a video of him wearing how did you spot him you what how did you spot him in the crowd well he he's wearing this beautiful green velour tracksuit How did you spot him? Wearing. You what? How did you spot him in the crowd?

Well, he's wearing this beautiful green velour tracksuit. And I was like, God, I want that fucking tracksuit. Did you know that Liberace managed to successfully sue two or three different newspapers who outed him? And he said, I'm not actually gay. It's like Liberace, the most flamboyantly gay performer in the world. He managed to successfully sue three or four newspapers for saying he was gay when he was clearly gay. Wonderful work.

I mean, amazing work. I think that's probably his. You probably just see it as his story to tell, though. Oh, no. Look, I'm saying amazing work. I'm saying it's fantastic that he had that story and was allowed to tell it in his own way. And I don't think it ever actually came out,

but he managed to fucking go after this really horrible kind of like outy kind of press who were just looking to kind of, you know, always describing as this perfumed kind of... Yeah, trying to muckrake, basically. I think, yeah, trying to muckrake. And he successfully, despite being the most flamboyantly gay performer, vibing as though it's perfumed kind of... Yeah, trying to muckrake, basically. I think, yeah, trying to muckrake, saying that it's... And he successfully, despite being the most flamboyantly gay performer out there,

he managed to successfully sue because he just... He wasn't ready to tell. It was his story. And what a fucking inspiration. Brilliant. And he made a shitload of money. He coined the phrase laughing all the way to the bank.

He was the guy who coined that. Yeah, but that sounds like the sort of phrase that loads of people claim they invented well apparently it was him i can only go off what people wouldn't realize about you pete as well they would be very um very used to listening to you and and and you know in consuming and experiencing your oeuvre and your output but what they don't know is that you insist on performing in front of a grand piano, which you never open the lid of with a candelabra on top, don't you? And you just speak into the box.

That's how you broadcast, isn't it? Yeah. Well, I sometimes go down to a clavinova. I'll sort of drag that into the studio. Yeah. If I'm interviewing someone for the first time, they're kind of confused about what's going to be taking place.

Yeah, it's important. I love a diva, mate. I think we should have more divas. Divas aren't as good these days, are they? No, well, it got co-opted by underwhelming kind of pop stars, didn't it? Oh, I'm a real diva. And obviously, you know,

it's tinged with a slightly kind of anti-female kind of bias as well. So it's kind of difficult, really. It's kind of difficult, really. It's kind of a tainted term a little bit. And also those high-kicking wrestling divas of the late 90s to mid-90s. There's a really good interview with

Mariah Carey in today's, as we record this, Monday's Guardian with Hadley Freeman. And I didn't fully realize the the story that mariah carey's had like the background she had and where she grew up and what she's become and she and in that interview she seems to really embrace the fact that she's a diva and that you know and she she explains the kind of her journey behind why she's um like she

is now i'm not so i'm not i'm not excusing her behavior i don't really know her behavior but i know that she's known as one of the one of the last evas and it reminded me of our friend rick edwards interviewing her have you seen that footage on t4 no i don't think i have no so on when rick presented t4 which for those listening from outside the uk back in the early noughties was the kind of youth part of channel 4 that used to go out on like a weekend morning i think mariah carey was on there um plugging a latest single or album or whatever and rick edwards who's a good he's a good interview i was interviewing her in this kind of um nod to camera type way like how crazy is this that i'm interviewing mariah carey etc and um they just start having like a general conversation and i think it's about all the lights in the studio and Rick says to her something throwaway like,

you know, oh God, I bet you're happy that you haven't got to pay our electricity bill. And she says, what? And he says, you know, the electricity bill for all the lights. She says, what are you talking about? And basically to cut a long story short, it turns out she doesn't even know what her bill is.

Because I guess she's never had to pay it. That's how you become bankrupt. I mean, I don't believe that for a second, that she's never paid an electricity bill. Because obviously she didn't come from money, did she? She came from a quite humble background, didn't she? But I do think that... Maybe it's called something different.

Yeah, I guess so. Maybe it's called job. An electricity contract. I think that you can be a diva and you can be someone who is quite difficult. As long as you treat the people around you fine, you can treat the system badly. I think that's can be a diva and you can be someone who's quite difficult. As long as you treat the people around you fine, you can treat the system badly. I think that's completely within your right.

Apart from the treating people around me. Yeah, exactly. I don't mind treating you badly because you're a dreadful man. You're a bit of a diva, Donny. Am I? I think so, because you would probably say that I'm more of a diva than you,

but I think you are much more prone to the meltdown than me.'m just yeah but i'm melting i'm not yeah but i'm melting down i'm very much like i'm melting down within um i don't i don't spray my magma on magma anywhere else i i'm i'm loving the fact that i'm burning myself keep your magma away from me yeah by the way to change the subject completely i found something amazing amazing the other day on Twitter. And I completely forgot to talk about it last week. But I'm going to talk about it now. And I don't know if you're aware of this.

I had absolutely no idea about this. I'd never really considered it before. And I'll be disappointed if you already know about it. But I'm going to talk to you about it anyway. And I'm pretty sure a lot of our listeners won't know about it. Have you heard the story about the euro uh currency banknotes no no basically when they were when they were desiring the euro currency obviously they had to actually design the coins and the notes and everything right and and it's not something you necessarily really considered right um and but they had to do

it and and what they wanted to do is they wanted to have some kind of graphic or picture on there i guess for artistic purposes but also for um for um anti um fraud fraud purposes i suppose for counterfeiting reasons and so they designed every single if you go and look if you've got a euro uh note to hand every single note bank note from the euro has got a bridge on it. It's a different bridge each time, right? One thing you wouldn't realize is that every single note has a bridge design on it that is a fictional bridge.

Oh, the bridges don't exist. Because they didn't want to have to choose between countries and put people's noses out of joint and have a diplomatic incident or whatever. So they invented the bridges, right? Then what happened was a small town in the Netherlands claimed every single one of them by building the bridges, as they're designed on the banknotes, over the canal going through their town. Yeah, okay, good.

That's nice. That is nice. And the town is called Spikenissa, I think it's pronounced, Spikenissa. And you can check it out. And if you look at their canal going through their town, they've got all the bridges on there. It's so weird. What a mad story.

Well, it's like really small versions of the bridges. They look identical to the ones on the banknotes. Yeah, just over like a regulation sized canal yeah I mean what is a regulation sized canal I don't know how big can canals get

30 paces and the height of a shire horse I've been spending a lot of time in Hertfordshire and and

and obviously there's a lot a lot of canals that sort of way towards Birmingham and obviously London's one way and Birmingham's the other. But over the weekend, it was absolutely chucking it down.

So a lot of them sort of burst their banks a little bit. And there was a little bit of water around the sides. So it was actually quite treacherous. You know my friend Alex? I do. Alex Gonzala. He is a man who... You don't normally name him like that.

Do I not? Okay. His name's Alex Gonzala. He's terrified of being a meme. He is terrified. He's the man who's You don't normally name him like that. Do I not? Okay, his name's Alex Anzala and he's a nightmare. He's terrified of being a meme. He is terrified. He's the man who's terrified of being a meme. He's very law effort.

He doesn't want to go anywhere. That's you saying that. And that's me saying that. Yeah, but I'm very much a fixer when it comes to planning holidays and little weekends away and stuff. He has none of that. He hates all that bollocks. He just wants to drink near his house um and if he has to come into town he's

annoyed and bearing in mind i live in like i lived in town you know i mean so i lived in the center of london so that's where all of the bars were it doesn't make any sense anyway um i i sort of got let's let's go up up uh harvard yeah we'll have a drink up there. It'd be brilliant. So dragged him and another mate up. And shit, you're not right. It was the Saturday, and it was absolutely chucking it down. You know over the weekend. I'm surprised there's still water in the goddamn air. It's insane how much water came down over the weekend.

And, you know, obviously a lot of flooding to it. But not only was there flooding, not only was there obviously this draconian 10 p.m. pub closing time, so he was very upset about that. When we actually got to sit down outside to one of the pubs, the barman came over and went, I'm sorry, lads, unless you've got a booking inside, I can't let you sit down for drinks

because there was a gypsy funeral in Hemel and all of the bars are closing to outside business because in the past, gypsies have descended on the pubs and obviously, you know, like a boozy wedding or a boozy funeral or a boozy wake can sometimes turn a little bit spicy. And yeah, we just don't want, you know, they have been known to smash the windows before.

They saw you dressed like you probably were and thought you were part of the funeral procession. My little suit. Yeah, it just really made me laugh that the rain was coming. So what did Alex do?

Did you just go and get fired by a couple of gans? Oh, he got furious. Oh, he got furious, yeah. He got furious because I'd got the off-license. Yeah, exactly.

So yeah, it just made me laugh that the Gypsy community prevented my friend from drinking. Can you even say Gypsy anymore, Pete? You can say Gypsy,

yeah. I think you can't, yeah, you can say Gypsy. I thought it was supposed to be the travelling community now, but I might even

have got that wrong. Yeah, the travelling community, but I think, yeah, but I think they're known as the Romany Gypsies or from other places, aren't they?

I think they're still good. What you can't say is what a current six music presenter said about 10 years ago on XFM, the P word and the travelling community, the organisation that represents their rights. Very hot on talking about that. It's just like, yeah, very, very strange. So, listen, did you get pissed or not? I did get pissed. I did get pissed.

I did get pissed. That's what people want to know. That's what people want to know. So, yeah, that was my weekend, avoiding rain and not being able to drink because there was a funeral happening. Why can't you just sit at home drinking Campari on your own like you used to?

I know. Well, I don't have a bottle of... you just sit at home drinking Campari on your own like you used to? I know. Well, I don't have a bottle. When I finished that bottle of Campari, I vowed that would be my last bottle of Campari. Oh, really? Yeah. I think it's too sweet.

I'm a man with impending blood pressure problems. I just think I should steer clear of the more sugary side of alcohol. By the way, speaking of that, and you're a great person to ask about this. So recently,

and I mean, I mean, psychologically to me, it's been since I've turned 40, but it can't just be that. I don't think that's how your body works. That it just ticks a box and all of a sudden things start happening. I've started to get like quite bad,

like acid and gas when I've been eating you must have had that what's your diagnosis Dr Donaldson and what would you prescribe I would have prescribed Zantac which is an excellent strong antacid is that an opiate

no it's not an opiate it's just some kind of really tightly packed antacid. But yeah, it was good. But then they fucked it by ranitidine, the active component. They couldn't supply it anymore because they couldn't guarantee the supply chain. Didn't have cancer-causing aspects to it. So now we can't have...

We can't have nice things. We can't have nice Zantac. I've had to go back to the old Remigels. What were they like? Remigels don't exist anymore. They were like chewy, not chalky.

Do you remember in the 90s? Yeah. It was like an antacid, but it was like, it was chewy. So yeah, you've just got to go with your Gaviscon,

I'm afraid. Is it any good Gaviscon? It's very basic. Yeah. I've also got another one that I bought in Italy a couple of weeks ago I learnt the word anti-acidio

anti-ac anti-acidio no anti-acidio yeah which I think is antacid in Italian said it three times

checked double checked that I was saying it correctly said it three times no one could understand a word I was saying and they just gave me finally figured out what it was by me rubbing my stomach and going yeah they finally figured out what I was

talking about, so clearly I wasn't saying it properly very upset. My friend Tommy we've been on quite a few trips together because like our friends will get married overseas or we'll just go on like a week away or whatever and he is very allergic to nuts and so he has to take with him

a laminated piece of paper with the translation of i am allergic to nuts in the local language and he kind of flashes his wallet like it's a credit card or something like he's a member of um a police force yeah but the thing is give me nuts i remember when we were in turkey together when we were in Turkey together, he flashed it and the waiter kind of just kept asking him in Turkish what type of nuts, I suppose. And he just had nothing in his locker. He couldn't say anything else. And so it wasn't specifically just any type of nut.

It was just all nuts. And I just felt like I would be, if that were me, I would be nervous about that because he's been around my house before and I've served up a curry, which they said was nut free and it wasn't and he had to go he had to go to bed and stay at my house and be sick in my toilet and all sorts and i felt bad about it um yeah but you bloody did nearly killing your friend yeah i told him i boycotted that curry house for giving us wrong information i haven't yeah you haven't you went straight back the next day yeah straight there it's the best one in the area what do you want me to do

give me give me the nuttiest curry give me the nuttiest karma you got but I would I would be really I would be really paranoid everywhere I went

if that was me because you come out your comfort zone and you oh mate like you protest the stuff that he knows alright but like

out of that comfort zone you're going to be you could be in real trouble right I had a mate who would like be really kind of on it with a way to go, listen, are you definitely sure there's no nuts?

Are you definitely sure? Because she's been served it a couple of times and her throat's gone open and she's just been absolutely ruined by it. It's so fraught with danger. And it's interesting, certainly with the peanut allergies, they don't really know why it's a relatively new thing.

They reckon that it might have something to do with babies getting washed or something. Did we speak about this on the show a couple of weeks ago? know why it's a relatively new thing they reckon that it might have something to do with um babies getting washed or something i think we did we speak about this on the show a couple weeks ago like it's something to do like um washing babies uh daily or every two days it's quite a recent phenomenon uh when it comes to um yeah i heard but there's there's really no like proper studies that have kind of figured out what why it's quite a modern phenomenon. But it fucking kills people, man. It's horribly dangerous.

Yeah, so I don't know specifically to nuts, but I certainly have read that one of the theories around the increase in allergies around things like asthma and hay fever and different bits and pieces is to do with the fact that... It's a theory. I'm not suggesting this is the case. I don't know enough about it, but I've certainly fact that it's a theory. I'm not suggesting this is the case. I don't know enough about it,

but I've certainly read that it's because children are a lot more protected these days. They don't go out and do stuff. They don't, but that to me feels a bit like. On their phones. Yeah. Like an old person.

Not living, not living in the moment. They're on their phones playing. You can download this right now with your eyes and ears, you mother fuckers. Peter, on that note, should we take a quick break

and come back and do some emails? Because we've got some crackers today. Let's do it, baby. Join me, Melissa Reddy, and listen to my brand new podcast, Between the Lines. I'll be speaking to the biggest names in football about the captivating, behind-the-scenes stories fans want to hear.

From major talking points to untold anecdotes, you'll hear from some of football's leading stars as well as those working in the shadows. In our first episode, I spoke to former Spurs manager Maurizio Pochettino about that Amazon documentary. Maurizio Pochettino about that Amazon documentary. We feel responsible because it was very difficult to say yes, to open the door to Amazon. Only we watched with Jesus the 25 minutes first, because it was until we left the club. And on our latest episode, I investigate how prevalent and damaging social media abuse is in football.

And I was like taking all this negativity onto myself and I did. I kind of lost myself and my personality because I knew everything that was going on around it. And it's not until I actually got to a stage where I thought I can't take this anymore. It is becoming too much for me that I spoke out about it. Craving football insight? Well, look no further. Listen to Between the Lines with me, Melissa Reddy, via Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever else you get your podcasts.

This was a Stakhanov production. It's the second half of the Luke and Pete Shaw Monday edition, gold edition, Nintendo seal of quality. How are you doing? Luke, we've got some emails from the people who seemed as worthy enough to email. Hello at LukeandPeteShow.com if you want to get involved. I'm going to kick things off with Andrew Jones. Hello, Andrew Jones.

On last week's episode, 28th of September or the 1st of September. Sorry, 1st of October. He talks about dogs sniffing out COVID. In true look and picture of madness, science-y, don't believe shit you read, I give you the woman who smells if people have Alzheimer's. This woman said her husband

smelt and he denied it for years and years. Sadly, he developed Parkinson's and his smell got worse. Then his wife visited a Parkinson's conference after his unfortunate death and it hit her. She had an obscure genetic mutation that meant her nasal senses could pick off the smell of Parkinson's. Keep with the good work.

Brexit slash eye surgery correspondent Andy. P.S. Mum and Dad are on the COVID vaccine trial. No, it's Parkinson's. Which one is it? Oh, I don't know. Yeah, well, he's kind of changed, hasn't he? Yeah. I thought Parkinson's was a branch of... I don't believe so.

This woman can smell... Sorry, she can smell both Alzheimer's, Parkinson's and cancers as well. Incredible. Yeah. Is that verified or not?

Well, it's on blog.thealzheimercite.greatergood.com forward slash joy hyphen smell. So, look, if you can't believe that URL, what can you believe? Fake news. Donald Trump would believe it. That's interesting, isn't it?

Imagine if you could, what would you choose to smell if you could smell anything that wasn't a smell? Ooh, um, wires. Probably wires. If you already used to smell wires in the wall. But that's rubbish. You'd get a little LCD thing for that. You just press a button.

Would you not want to smell lying or something? Smell lying? I'd be smelling it all the time. It'd be like living in fucking, I don't know, like a horrible, dirty city all the time. And that's just before you left the house. I know. Lying to myself.

I'd do it myself then. I'd be gutted. Do you remember an email from back in the day and not that long ago maybe a month or two ago from a guy who would like to be known as just t simply t and he he is the guy who you said had in quotes a dildo daddy because he found a quite large sex toy in his dad's bedside table do you remember that i do remember that and i enjoyed it immensely for his email with a follow-up um he says hello luke and p it's t here again you may remember me from a previous dildo infused episode i am the anonymous emailer that was very

confused to find a huge sexual assistant in my previously single dad's drawer. Sexual assistant. That makes it sound weird. First, though, I'd like to apologize as I've let you down. After breaking down my email, Luke set me the task of somehow confronting my dad about his hefty mate, but I just couldn't do it. If you knew my dad and his reserved, shy and well-mannered demeanor, you would know that this is just far too awkward to even consider. However, you will be happy to hear that there has definitely been a considerable second wave of his private nickname,

dildo daddy. My original intention was to never reveal to anyone that the story had been released to the masses, but just as in the original telling curiosity got the best of me. And I once again brought a friend in on it because clearly Luke's advice of never do that had fallen on deaf ears before i knew it everyone at my local cricket club was once again reminded of the story and i have a dildo daddy roared at me in pete's accent more times than i can bear on the bright

side though my friends did tune in to listen to pete sharing my story and they liked what they heard by my calculations you have gained around 10 subscribers so I'm happy I can do my bit. On a similar note to my failed task, I would just like to put a question out to yourselves and the listeners. What are the most awkward conversations people have had with parents or family members? I know if I ever have to have this conversation with Double D, don't call your own dad that. It will certainly jump straight to the top of my list. Thanks, Luke and Pete. Keep up the great will certainly jump straight to the top of my list.

Thanks, Luke and Pete. Keep up the great work with the show and the rest of the amazing Stakhanov podcasts. T. I like that one dildo has begat another and created a double-ended dildo of listenership, I think. Listen, I would say in terms of currency exchange, us getting 10 subscribers is more than worth a man's relationship with his own father breaking down beyond repair.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I completely agree with you there. What are we here for if not to ruin people's lives? Well, he brought the story to us. We didn't go fishing for the story. No, no. It was just there. Yeah.

Speaking of parents, how are your parents doing, Pete? Good, yeah. I'm trying to think what my dad's been up to. He sends me a lot of pictures from quite early in the morning of snails out. Nice. He's also discovered FaceApp, where you can make your face fat and stuff. So he's been sending me a lot of pictures of him looking a little bit like a big fat Santa. There was something else

that was quite surprising, but now I've completely forgotten what it is, to be honest. But yeah, he's just as mad as usual, really. Just as mad as usual. What kind of weather have they been having up in Hartlepool? Is it under lockdown at the moment? Yes, I believe it is, yeah. I mean, they didn't really do anything in the

first place, to be fair, but yeah, they just never really got anywhere anyway. But it's, of course, now they're in lockdown, they're very upset that they can't go out. It's like, you never went out anywhere. Didn't you once buy them a holiday to Iceland and they refused to go?

Yep, yep, they refused to go, yeah. So if anything, lockdown's really nothing, there's no change to them, really. No, no, no, awful. used to go yeah so if anything lockdown's really nothing there's no change to them really no no awful we got an email from Alec Lodge in Essex

I've read his full name out I'm hoping that I'm not going to have to you always do that because it always bloody happens

isn't it carry on I just need that hook of the name carry on from Sniffer Dog Chat on Thursday I thought I'd share

this fairly interesting story I work for a large international shipping company, one of the big names. I wouldn't even know what a big name was. Is it Smursk or Mursk?

Cargill, that's a big one, Cargill. Cargill, is it? Arthur Cargill. And I used to work in the warehouse sorting parcels of all sorts from all over the world. So exciting! So exciting! They must have handled so much heroin.

I've since moved over to be a lorry driver for the same company. I know! We would occasionally see customers come in with sniffer dogs, which was always quite interesting. One particular day, we were told that they were coming in with the dog to sniff out counterfeit DVDs. Clearly, the dog had no idea whether they were counterfeit,

but they could sniff out the discs. I was working in the area where they were using the dog. They were fucking mad. Yeah, and I saw it signal quite a few boxes to its handler, which the custom guys opened, and every single one had CDs or DVDs in it. Not sure if they're dodgy, but it was very fascinating. I guess dogs can be trained to sniff out anything that has a unique scent.

That's the thing. The thing that gets me is, Alec, nowadays some dogs have been trained to sniff out little SD cards, little camera cards, right? Now, they must smell exactly the same as every other plastic slash metal bit of electronics out there.

I can understand like magnetic tapes, I can probably understand CDs or DVDs, they've got a very specific scent, haven't they? They're plastic or

some kind of vinyl-y kind of surface. Yeah, I don't know how they can find, you know, they go to a drug dealer's house and obviously, you know,

the drug dealer's need some kind of data to keep hold of their information. So, sniffing dogs have been used to go into cavity walls and find SD cards filled with data and information. It's an amazing, amazing discipline. Well, why are they going after that?

Go after the drugs. Go after the drugs, yeah. We brought the wrong dog. All right, find the SD cards. Do you reckon that's what they do? They get a different dog off the shelf for a different product? Yeah. Well, yeah,

because you're only trained on one thing, aren't you? A very specific thing as well. So obviously we had the dogs of COVID, unleashed the dogs of COVID. And yeah. I feel like it's gone too far. It has.

Yeah. I'm getting too reliant on these dogs now because the thing is, I understand that they can sniff out drugs, right? That's straightforward to me. I understand that they can sniff out or find people in distress up on a mountain or whatever or in a burning building and they give them their little things to put on their paws so they don't burn

their paws which is amazing and they're amazing but i feel like are we in danger of becoming new too reliant on them you know is it going to get to the point where we're going to want to make dinner but we have to get a dog in to sniff out where we've kept the food so we can get it? I don't understand how they can sniff something that's so inanimate. Could in theory, and if people out there know about this, get in touch, could you in theory train them to sniff out anything if you use something as a template? So, for example, I get a piece of kitchen kitchen roll and i say smell that and then go and find it they could they find that could they find anything simple as that even i think they

could but that's the thing the variation between materials between one kitchen roll brand to the next would mean that they probably would find it very difficult but i think the that's that's the weird thing about sd cards i can't understand them because obviously there are different companies you know all over china and taiwan and Taiwan and Korea making these cards. And like, like why do SD cards smell similar to other brands of SD cards? Cause presumably there'll be different, different manufacturing processes,

or maybe there just isn't. There's just one place making those plastic cases and that's what they can smell. I'm fascinated. I'm fascinated. And you're listening out there and you want to smuggle an SD card or two, two um do what i would do in that situation to evade the sniffer dogs and just simply drag them through a flowing river before you travel with them which will put is that right that's what they do is that go for the river the dog won't catch you if you go for a river it can't

take you can't follow your scent through a river so if you're getting chased by a lot of bloodhounds perhaps pete yeah you as a member of the working classes, have accidentally stumbled upon an aristocratic estate and they sent the bloodhounds on you. And in this story that I've got in my mind here, you're completely naked and you're in tears. Run through a river. I've had a day of it.

Run through a river and get up a tree. I've had a day with an aristocrat, yeah. I'd just throw a memory card at them and they would just be like a little northern golem. Yeah, leave a trail

of SD cards wherever you go. SD cards, yeah, exactly. They wouldn't know what's hitting them, would they? This is like when I got you to eat

that Nintendo Switch cartridge and you were just disgusted by the whole thing. Yeah, I was. Do you know what? It's a testament to how little I know about technology. And I know I've got a reputation in our company

for being so bad with technology. But it's a testament to how little I know is that the reason I didn't want to lick that cartridge to start with is because I thought I was going to get an electric shock. Oh, no. Even though it's not really got a battery or any power source in it, has it?

Terrible business. So there we go. That's terrible business. There we go. All right, then. That's been the Monday show. We'll be back on Thursday. Thursday morning at 5 a.m.

Zero hours, 5 a.m. That's when we're going to be back. What if something goes wrong? Oh, it's fine. Nothing's going to go wrong. All right, I say seven. Give us two hours for this. All right.

Thanks very much for listening. We'll be back on Thursday. As Pete says, hello at LukeandPeteShow.com is I said seven. Give us a two thousand for this. All right. Thanks very much for listening. We'll be back on Thursday as Pete says hello at LukeandPeteShow.com is the email address. We're at

LukeandPeteShow on Twitter. Give us a little review if you like the show and tell your pals about it. For example,

one man listening to this show today has sacrificed a relationship with his own father to get 10 subscribers to

this show. That is the kind of attitude we need. We'll be back on Thursday. We're back on Thursday. We'll see you then. This was a Stakhanov production

and part of the ACAST Creative Network.