The Luke and Pete Show - Two Hours Late for the War

Episode Date: July 2, 2026

Pete finds himself outnumbered in his fight against the accusation that he’s a point-scorer and Luke takes the opportunity to explain his lateness to the second Football Ramble World Cup Watch Party.... Conversation then turns (inevitably) to smelly capsule hotels and submarine warfare.Finally, it’s time for a battery offering, an email about advanced tyre technology and news of an Australian mouse plague.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.The Luke and Pete Show is the sometimes ridiculous, always funny podcast with Luke Moore and Pete Donaldson: two men who have time on their hands and a good idea of how to waste it. Subscribe to get your comedy podcast fix every Monday and Thursday. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Luke be sure. Luke Pete's with you for another day out, if you will. It's another day out. Pete and Luke, on a day out, doing things. We're inside. We are inside. We've spent some time outside recently, haven't we? We have.
Starting point is 00:00:24 I spent a bit of time with the partner you have access to last week. I mean, you were there. I've done to see as I made it sound. I don't know why I said it like that. I followed her in a park. We had a great moment. Me and the part of the you had access to, we bonded. really well because she came straight over to me
Starting point is 00:00:40 and was like, that thing you said about Pete being a big point scorer at home, I punched the air when you said that. I said, well, it's true, isn't it? She was absolutely true. And you came bowling over and a tack her with one hand and a beer in the other. Sounds like two points scorers uniting for a home field goal. I'm not denying my position.
Starting point is 00:01:04 You'll do that. Don't have a glass of water to settle yourself. to settle your nerves before you get stuck in. I'm drinking out of me Stanley Cup. It's absolutely massive. A Stanley Cup that I bought Sarah that she's never used.
Starting point is 00:01:16 Thank you. Another point being scored by you there. Yeah, that was my point. We bonded. We bonded over that. You bonded, yeah. I said, look, you know, he is like that.
Starting point is 00:01:27 I know he's like that. I'm sorry that he's like that at home when tensions are probably considerably higher because you've got a toddler in the house, and there's lots to do. Proximity. Smell. You can smell me.
Starting point is 00:01:35 I have a chance to to tap out of the Donaldson connection if I need to. Right, yeah. I'll probably arrest. Yeah, the Donn and Sock connection. Yeah, and then you, she doesn't have that option, sadly. But we bonded and I think we both felt that we were right on that particular issue. Yeah, I mean...
Starting point is 00:01:52 Did it anger you? It angers me because when someone causing a point score, it's very hard to say anything that doesn't sound like you're trying to score a point. There's no, you know, you can either, you can either kind of, do what Garner did, down tools and just pack the box with defence-minded players. Or you can
Starting point is 00:02:14 go for the counter-attack. But the counter-attack does mean you might score a goal at one point. But you look really, you are also, weirdly, you're also really defensive. You're also really defensive. It's this haram ball that I've got play. It's the modern game. I'm trying to score goals. I'm Kevin Keegan's
Starting point is 00:02:30 entertainers in a world of, you know, Arsenal. Do you know what you need to do? It's like you have an argument at home about something. So it's about the, you know, I don't know, it could be about anything. And you're proven to be right. That never happens, though. It doesn't, never to the degree I need it to. So what I'm saying is to not be a point to.
Starting point is 00:02:49 That's unfamiliar to me. But to not be a point that you could just not acknowledge it, just move on, knowing that you know yourself that you're right and that's fine. Nobody does that. I just want, I just want, well, basically, I want someone else to acknowledge that a point has been scored. maybe during like maybe I have like a counter system or a gold star I want a gold star look that's what I need you know what you missed an opportunity to score a point on me right because I said on one of the round but episodes you would have heard it if you went on right you might even been on it that for the first World Cup watch party you were almost two hours late right right and I just made a joke out of that and everyone had a little chuck and everyone moved on with them so you didn't say anything and then for the second World Cup watch party for various different reasons I was actually taking two hours late. Well, there you go.
Starting point is 00:03:35 But you didn't mention it. But what was your reasons? I was having, I was having, I was having, I was having, I was having, I was having,
Starting point is 00:03:40 I was having, I was having, I was having, it just ran long. Sometimes things run long. Yeah. And to be honest, it,
Starting point is 00:03:48 it does serve the company better if I don't turn up to a pub too early. Because let's face it, if I'm turning up to a, to do, um,
Starting point is 00:03:58 a brewery at Hapas 4, whatever, and we're ending the show at, midnight. I mean, this entire occasion did involve you ending up, climbing up some scaffolding dressed as Richard Keyes, with a stolen high vest on, a high vis vest on.
Starting point is 00:04:13 A high vis vest on. A high vis vest. A hat hard on. With a hat hard on. With a hat hard on. With a hard on, hat hard on. So how could it have been worse? Would you have fallen off the scaffold? Well, that's for me.
Starting point is 00:04:23 That was me without those two hours of drinking in them, to be quite frank. And I had, and the sure the next day isn't the better for it. And the thing that gets me is, like, I can be hung over, but I can still be, you know, full of the joys of spring when it comes to England. But if England don't put in a performance, Marcus is bereft. I've never seen the man so bereft. It's incredible.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Yeah, he doesn't get up. He, like, has a hangover from England. You see him on the way into the World Watch Party, and he's on his own listening to World Emotion. He was listening to it. It's amazing. It lives the brand, man, I'm telling you. He lives the brand. He's great stuff.
Starting point is 00:04:56 The reason I was, the reason I was late is because, and this is admittedly a first world problem, so, you know, bear with me, but this is literally what happened. Because of the childcare arrangements, because of the location of where we're doing it, I had to stay, because of work,
Starting point is 00:05:10 I had to stay in a hotel quite, basically in between the venue and the studio because I was to work first thing the next day. And so I got to the hotel and they said the room would be ready from 3 o'clock and it wasn't ready.
Starting point is 00:05:27 So I was like, I could like, so I mean, I need it to be ready because they had done my stuff and they were quite incompetent. I didn't really want to leave my stuff with them because I didn't trust them to get it in the room. It was a nice hotel, wasn't it?
Starting point is 00:05:38 Not really. I mean, it's fucking expensive for what it was. They're so expensive. Yeah, it's wild. And I think also it didn't help the fact that Harry Stiles was doing 54 nights at Wembley Stadium so the whole world and this dog is staying in London. How was he getting a residency?
Starting point is 00:05:52 I saw the residency. It's like 13 gig. He's massive. I don't know how many nights it is, but he is massive. How are you that big? That's amazing. Do you want to hear up the perspective of it, right?
Starting point is 00:06:00 So fast forward a little bit through the story. On the way back, I went to McDonald's to get a burger. This would have been midnight, probably. Yeah. And the one in King's Cross. There were more Harry Stiles fans
Starting point is 00:06:12 than the We're England fans. Yeah. I mean, that's how big it is. Do you know how much it costs to? Rent Wembley for a day. Go on. I know the Palladium is 22 grand plus VAT. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:23 Million? 300 grand. Not that bad, is it? It's not bad, is it? Is that dry hole? Do you get all the staff? Yes, I think Are you getting all the staff, I think, for that?
Starting point is 00:06:33 Yeah, I think so, yeah. That is not bad. It's not bad. It's near bad. It's near bad. Yeah, anyway, so basically the point was, so the room wasn't ready for a while. So when I finally got the room ready,
Starting point is 00:06:44 I went into the room and it was about 35 degrees in there. And I was like, okay, this is like, this is obviously unacceptable. I'm not going to be able to sleep in this room. So we need to get the aircon going, or we need to move rooms. Yeah. So I'll get the aircon on.
Starting point is 00:06:59 So they put the aircon. on on, so I could see there was actually echo in the room. It went off again after about half an hour when I was getting ready. It's like, why has it gone off again? Oh, no, we'll put it back on. When I got home back to the hotel that night, it had gone off again. Is it one of those things where you put the card in? No, no, no, it wasn't even that.
Starting point is 00:07:16 They have to do it manually from the reception. And there's no phone in the room, right? This feels like a converted, which is one of those hotels where it's just a converted Victorian house. I was on the fourth floor. There's no lifts. I'd keep going down there because they wouldn't respond to the room. to the WhatsApp they said was monitored 24-7. Anyway, the whole thing was a bit of a shit show.
Starting point is 00:07:34 And so it made me late and quite flustered. The one thing you don't want to be when it's like 33 degrees outside is like in a hurry and flustered. So I just really tone it down and just try and get there slowly so I wasn't a sweaty mess when I turned up. So that's the reason anyway. All right. Well, I rented a basically like a sort of, like a Japanese sort of capsule hotel in
Starting point is 00:07:54 Tottenham Court Road. That's a really depressing sentence. Saturday gig. and I'm just because I'm not on the show on the Sunday I gave the hotel room to Marcus but I've yet to get his review on it so I need to get his review or his money presumably
Starting point is 00:08:14 yeah I'm not going to take any money off him but I will take pictures you want to know what's going on in there I want to know what it's like a Tottenham Court Road based you know 70 quid a night capsule hotel fascinating what does that actually look like in real life there.
Starting point is 00:08:31 So what does it mean when it's a capsule? I don't think we really sort of do capsules in this country properly. You know, capsules are just like
Starting point is 00:08:37 it would be like you know like when they load missiles in submarines, you know, there's that kind of capsule like a tube that goes off
Starting point is 00:08:43 into the distance. That's a proper capsule. That sounds horrible. Well, I mean, it's individually air conditioned. They're pretty well insulated. There's a lot of privacy.
Starting point is 00:08:55 You know, you close the door and you know, you could be anywhere. No, you can't sign up in it. It's a capsule. But I think,
Starting point is 00:08:59 I think these are a little bit larger. They're kind of more pods than capsules. But an incredible development. It's amazing how the short people live. I like to hear it. You'd be fine, in it? You just can't stand up. I did a nice room on the Caledonian sleeper once.
Starting point is 00:09:16 And the Wi-Fi have access to who's five foot one. Yeah. It's like, this is amazing. It's great. It's really nice. And I was like, I feel like I'm in a fucking tin of sardines. I can't move. I literally cannot move.
Starting point is 00:09:28 Yeah. You're not built for some money. aren't you, yes. No way. I could never serve on a submarine. No, no. Do you know what's mad? Did you know that the first ever,
Starting point is 00:09:38 I believe I'm right in saying, the first ever working submarine was in, used, developed in the US Civil War. Right. Oh, wow. How was that? It's literally like in the 18th. What use would you have for that?
Starting point is 00:09:48 Well, do you know how they used? It's a land war, wasn't it? You know, it's basically, it was basically, no, no, there was definitely a lot. There was a lot of kind of sea stuff. Right, okay, fair. A lot of blockage of ports and stuff like that. And the, the way that it worked,
Starting point is 00:09:59 and I am not an expert on this, so bear with me, I'm fairly certain the way it worked is it was basically a suicide machine. They basically put like six people in this submarine with like a big corkscrew thing that you had to manually do that with to get the propeller to work.
Starting point is 00:10:19 Yeah. It would go at a maximum of like 10 miles an hour and on the front of it was a massive explosive device. Right. And he just fucking plowed it into a ship and blew it up and blew themselves up as well. And the thing that's mad about that is that happened. I forget the name of it, but you can look it up.
Starting point is 00:10:35 That happened. Then people were like, oh, that's a good idea. We'll do more of those. And that's what they develop from. If you look at even serving in a submarine in like the First World War even, it is horrific. But they're even horrific now. You go down for months and months. If you die, you get put in front storage.
Starting point is 00:10:54 They don't have fucking service for you. If you're ill. You know, if you die, you die pretty much. and they just stick you in, they just stick you in, stick you in, stick you in cold storage if you die. A torpedo bay?
Starting point is 00:11:04 In the torpedo bay? Is it, does it stink of farts? Yeah, yeah, it's like, things you're allowed to do and things you want, and you just don't smoke as well.
Starting point is 00:11:12 You can't have a tab. Terrible. Did your old man ever serve on a submarine? No, no. How'd you know this then? The HMS Penelope. People talk,
Starting point is 00:11:21 there wasn't asked me anything on Reddit, on a submarine man. What, a modern submariner? A modern submariner, yeah. So you can't, So can they, if they're having a bit of downtime or whatever, in like in sort of calmer seas,
Starting point is 00:11:35 can they just surface and have a little muck about and have a tab on the deck? I don't think so, no. That would be, would that not give away your location needlessly when you've got all the crisps you can eat down there? But do you remember that story of the Russia? I think it was a Russian submarine who they surfaced and they couldn't get out and they worked out
Starting point is 00:11:53 is because they had a fucking gigantic walrus on the hatch. Oh, nice, okay. Wow. There's like a three-ton walrus on the hatch. And they're like, what can't get out? You'd think you'd want some like outside cameras for that sort of thing. Because like, you know, you get them on planes, don't you? You get outside cameras of like what's happening outside the actual submarine itself.
Starting point is 00:12:15 You'd think that you'd be able to see the way of the hatches and what state it's in. Oh, here we go. Apparently the most, so a walrus sleep on top of a submarine hatch was a Dutch. It was a Dutch submarine and a walrus. named Freya who climbed a board and fell asleep on the deck, trapping the crew and forcing them to use an alternate hatch. Isn't that mad? That's so funny.
Starting point is 00:12:38 What an occupational hazard that is. Yeah, for me, I think, what's funny, because when I went to the, this is Partridge, when I went to the Imperial War Museum at Duxford, where they were all the planes. My dad there, he loves a lot of stuff. My dad's amazing at naming planes, identifying planes and he loves planes
Starting point is 00:12:59 so he went there and had a Harry a jump jet you could sit in and there's a spitfire you could sit in and I had absolutely zero chance of getting in either of them but honestly it was they're tiny I just sometimes think to myself
Starting point is 00:13:16 I know we wonder about the Britain but I think to myself how many good pilots did we miss out on oh because of the size of the things they're just tall How much? It's like you're missing a lot of the talent pool out there.
Starting point is 00:13:29 You can't, for my money, you can't limit a talent pool to people five foot six and smaller. Yeah. What would you be in the war? What would you have done in the wall? I would, well, look, I'll give you the, the fantastic answer and the realistic answer. The fantastical answer is I would have been an amazing,
Starting point is 00:13:48 really, really good spy in occupied Paris or something. Right, yeah, like that. And the real, answer was I would have been killed instantly in a battle for quite simply not listening to the instructions properly. Desertion. Instant. No, I'm not coward. I'm not, I'm not, I'll have anything
Starting point is 00:14:08 you've done, but I'm not having coward. There's no way I'm, you can't say I'm a coward. I'm not a coward. Luke Moore was two hours late for the war. He got shot. Shot at Don. It's like in it's like in Gladiator when the Wacking Phoenix's turns off his character. Did I miss the battle, father? You missed the war. He doesn't want to be there.
Starting point is 00:14:27 Now, I don't think I would be a coward. What would you be doing? You are 100% cannon fodder in World War I. Yeah, I'd be, yeah, I'd be long dead. I'd just be like, they'd find out of asthma and they'd just put him in the front. He'd shoot his lungs off. His lungs shot off. That would be very sad.
Starting point is 00:14:46 Pete, let's have a quick break. When we come back, we'll do a bit more of this, shall we? All right. We're back at the Looking Pete, sure. and I'm trying to log into the little Pete show
Starting point is 00:14:56 running out I think read some bloody emails but it's asking me it's Google is asking me
Starting point is 00:15:00 to log into the production to get access I'm very annoyed by you do you know what I
Starting point is 00:15:05 legitimately did the other day I went to the big supermarket to try and find a
Starting point is 00:15:10 watermelon big enough that my son could wear it as a pair of pants and I couldn't
Starting point is 00:15:14 find them they only sell little ones in the in the in the supermarkets
Starting point is 00:15:19 it's very annoying I've got some massive ones anymore from the Wi-Fi of access to, but she was like,
Starting point is 00:15:25 you're not going to find one big enough. And she would, and she basically made the point that in the US, you'd definitely be to do it, but you can't do it here. Yeah, completely agree.
Starting point is 00:15:32 That's a shame, isn't it? That's a shame. Because my son would definitely be up for that. He loves that stuff. Yeah. He loves little jokes. He loves little kind of practical, practical jokes and stuff.
Starting point is 00:15:41 Yeah, he's all over there. Decent. Decent. Do you want to do a battery? I've got a battery here. Let's do a battery for crying out loud. Ooh. It's from our friend,
Starting point is 00:15:51 And Andre. Andre. He says, Hello to Luke and the P. I almost got locked out the house I got access to so I'm changing the battery for a brand new
Starting point is 00:16:00 Murata. M-U-R-A-T-A. In Brazil, this type of controller to open and close your house gate is pretty common. Thanks, and I hope to have my third new player.
Starting point is 00:16:11 Well, it's a CR 2032, Donaldson. Can you see the photo of it? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I guess is Murata written on the
Starting point is 00:16:21 actual battery itself. I believe it is, isn't it? It is. I can see it and bossed on there. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah, I think that's okay. I think that's broadly fine. It's pretty down there. It's not pretty. That's great news for Andre, because that is his hat trick. That's a brand new player. We've never had it before. Oh my God. Congratulations to you, Andre.
Starting point is 00:16:38 Congratulations, Andre. And good work on the good work on the Spanish striker named battery. Verrata. He's not spelt the same, is it? Not spelled the same. but that's a simple little circuit board, isn't it? Look at that. You knocked that up in the afternoon, couldn't you?
Starting point is 00:16:56 Very simple device, isn't it? Very simple devices, very simple. I mean, you hope your safety is paramount. David Evans has been in touch. Hello to you, David. He says, hello to Luke and Pete. I have access to. I'm a Brit living in British Columbia, Canada.
Starting point is 00:17:09 I wanted to add to your discussion about tubeless tires that I said to you the other day, why on earth are we still filling tires with air, given all the technology we've got access to these days and why are people still getting punctures it's dangerous, particularly at high speed, what's going on? Dave says it's been standard for the tyres
Starting point is 00:17:27 used in mountain and road biking to be tubeless for a while now. The tyre rim and valves are all airtight with the tyre filled with a liquid latex. What? The tyre is seated securely on the rim. Liquid latex. The latex coaxed coast the inside of the tyre and quickly seals up any small holes made by thorns and like almost entirely
Starting point is 00:17:43 eliminating flats from small punctures. That's amazing. What a development? There's also no inner tube to get pinched between the rim and the ground, so no flats that way either. Larger holes are plugged with small bits of rubber with the latex doing the rest of the ceiling. It's a brilliant system. So why this is not used for car tires, I do not know,
Starting point is 00:17:59 maybe the evil tire conglomerate Lego wants people to purchase more tires. That's amazing. That's really, really fun. I thought I was on something there, but I couldn't quite remember why. I love that it sort of instantly seals the halls just as they go in. Because I'm having a running battle with the paddling pool, in my garden. Okay, tell us more about that.
Starting point is 00:18:20 Because you put too much chlorine in it? No, no, the chlorine levels are absolutely tip-top because I test it every day. But the actual stopper, I think it's got a slow puncture. I'm just trying to sort of, I'm just busy battling against, you know, I'm like King Canute, but a less successful one. Or a successful one?
Starting point is 00:18:36 At what point do you have to just bite the bullet and buy a new paddling pool? It's a good one, though. And everyone, the family's really enjoying it. It's the best thing I've ever bought. The amount of stuff I buy that have just, it's just been a fucking waste of money I dropped my phone yesterday.
Starting point is 00:18:53 I bought a phone in Japan when the yen was really fucking cheap and I dropped the phone and it just, the screen, the top's gone all bright. It's just gone all bright and it's taken all the colour out. I'm so annoyed of myself. I think, I've known you... I need to stop. I've known you since 2000 and, I want to say, six-ish, right?
Starting point is 00:19:15 Obviously, very good friends with your ex-girlfriend who's moved on. Oh, I was paling up with my, always telling up with the ladies I have access to to conspire against me. I was good friends at the time. I haven't seen her for a long time now, but I follow her life a little bit on Instagram.
Starting point is 00:19:29 She's got an amazing life. She's done brilliantly well. Fantastic. Careful, people are calling you a bully. I'm not bully. I'm just so stupid. I didn't say that. The people out there say,
Starting point is 00:19:39 call you a bully. They said it was uncomfortable. I'm a coward and a bully now, my cousin to your bullying. A coward and a money. It's a beautiful combination. as a spy in Occupied France. And now I'm suddenly a coward.
Starting point is 00:19:49 And now I'm a bully as well. Purely for supporting an independent young woman having a good life. That's what's come down to. In reception, in a Parisian hostelry complaining about the aircon in the room. Madam, can you turn the air conditioning on, please? Sir, the Nazis are jackbooting their way down the street. We cannot do your heck in the moment. Anyway, look, she's had a good life.
Starting point is 00:20:14 It's all I'm saying. She's doing very well. Fine. I knew her quite well, and that's how I knew you. Right. And the point I'm going to make... I've got a paddling pool. She's got the Bermudan course line.
Starting point is 00:20:24 She has. Which is... And I'm fine with that. In the words of London rapper Morrison, she's leveled up, right? But... Hang on, there's a London rapper called Morrison. Yeah. That's very enjoyable.
Starting point is 00:20:36 I like him. Anyway, anyway, I was just going to say, in the 20 years I've known you, I think you've had more portable cellular telephones than any other human being I've ever met. my life. Yeah, even the drug dealers. How many do you reckon you've had? I don't know. I don't tend to change them. I do tend to break them lately. I think the Android ecosystem hasn't treated me fairly, quite frankly.
Starting point is 00:20:58 I reckon you've had 25? What, since... You've definitely had more than one a year? Nah, no. One a year, I think, on average, is absolutely fine. It feels like you've always got a different phone whenever I see you. That's what I feel about it. And it's normally completely unidentified as well. I've never seen anyone else with it.
Starting point is 00:21:19 Well, the problem is you buy a Xiaomi 17 Ultra and you just sort of go can anyone fix this? You get these exotic items. Yeah, no one knows what to do of it. Can anyone fix this if it breaks? No, is the answer. No. Speaking of the paddling pool though,
Starting point is 00:21:33 have you seen there's a lot of internet content about how to survive best in a heat wave? Right. Do you have any tips yourself? How to cope in a heat wave type tips? Ooh. Yeah. There's a few wacky ones out there.
Starting point is 00:21:49 Yeah, I mean, it's all about like, it's like wear a wet shirt, close all your windows, close all your curtains, you know, create a through draft, all that in it. It's all that business.
Starting point is 00:21:58 It's not going to work though, is it, this stuff? I mean, ultimately, we have to admit as a country, and particularly as a... We need to adopt the air conditioning.
Starting point is 00:22:05 We just do. As a city in London, we're not, we're not set up for it. No. I've got a couple of portable aircon units and they make a massive difference, but they're expensive.
Starting point is 00:22:13 Are they air con or are they just to like a, are they proper aircon? with like a horse that goes out to the other. Yeah, you fix the windburn, you seal it up. Yeah. They're good. But I mean, ultimately, what happens is in the modern society is what's obviously happened, which is that the prices get gout as soon as the, whether it gets hot.
Starting point is 00:22:32 Yeah. Never buy it where it's hot, yeah. Yeah, I was bad at the start. And then they also run out. I looked this morning, because I was saying to someone in the office, oh, you need to get one because they were some of their flats, it's unbearable at the moment. I looked up on Amazon, you can't get one before the 1st of August now.
Starting point is 00:22:43 Yeah. They'll all be, I mean, I don't know how much. that supply chain goes through the Suez that's Suez Canal, Jesus Christ somebody canals, I never knew we'd be sort of talking about so many canals these days. The straight of moves is not a canal.
Starting point is 00:22:55 It's not a canal, but like, yeah, but like thoroughfare, like water-based thoroughfare. Yeah. You reckon that's a problem with you? I don't know, I mean, like, remember when we couldn't get anything because of the Suez Canal for a few days?
Starting point is 00:23:07 Well, that boat, that got stuck, that shit, but stuck a little of it. That was a fucking stinker. What that is that? I feel like it should, I feel that they should widen that, because that feels like,
Starting point is 00:23:15 That could happen at any time. And then did you see the, speaking out, did you see the guy who, um, who they wrote, South East Water rolled out to explain while there's going to be a hose pipe ban in,
Starting point is 00:23:25 um, in large parts of the hottest part of the UK. Right. They basically like, rolled out the meekest, like, sympathy garnering bloke. He was like,
Starting point is 00:23:36 who was just endlessly apologising. And it was like, I feel, I actually felt bad for him. That's how bad it got. You know my feelings on water companies. That's how bad it got. actually felt bad for the guy because the mere kind of um that hint of some hot weather it goes
Starting point is 00:23:54 to shit southeast water right guess how much right this is fucking insane i know i know i get my horse about this and people get bored of it but just bear with me on this right how much water do you think southeast water alone they're not even this not even the whole country it's just like ken and sussex i guess how much water do you think they're losing A day through leaks. A day. Gallons, liters. Give it to me a litur.
Starting point is 00:24:21 I've got it here. In liters. Okay. A day, Pete, just in leaks. It's probably like a million, isn't it? It's probably like something insane. Or like 100,000. It's 100 million liters a day.
Starting point is 00:24:33 Not a water company. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, exactly. That's exactly right. You're not a water company. You are... You're not even a steward of water at that point. No, if you have a hundred...
Starting point is 00:24:45 150 dropped edits every podcast episode. You're not a podcast company, are you? No, no. It's a shamble. If you delete 100 million episodes every year. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So basically, you make 50 episodes a week and you lose 75.
Starting point is 00:25:03 You're a negative podcast company. They're a negative podcast company. They're a fire company. They're actually a fire company. The opposite of water. It's like, the reason it just blows my mind entirely, It's because this is, we've created a society wherein this is somehow legitimate.
Starting point is 00:25:21 Yeah. But the guy can front up and go, well, we're losing 100 million litres a day. So, you know, you know, so you can't use it because we're losing it all? Where's it going? Do you know, like how water is attracted to dryness? Do you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:25:34 It will cost towards the absence of moisture and that. Do you reckon that's what they're doing? Do you reckon they're clearing out all their pipes so that they can get it back later. They just sort of like get it. There must be. There's no explanation for it how bad it is. I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I cannot understand how it's, it's for, it's a man who represents a water company who is saying 850,000 people in this area are not allowed to use their hose pipes because we are losing 100 million litres of water a day.
Starting point is 00:26:12 Incredible. Absolutely. Incredible. It's amazing. It's amazing. They've done a lovely job there. It's like being in the supermarket and saying, thanks for coming in.
Starting point is 00:26:21 Yeah. You can't buy any food because we've lost it all. We haven't got any food. We've lost it all. Yeah. A mouse took it. Can I have 80 pounds, please? Can I have 80 pounds please?
Starting point is 00:26:30 A mouse took it. Oh, God. You just that swarm of mice in Australia? No, I didn't see the swarm of nice. I said it to Jim Campbell because he was talking about it. So basically, there's a, mouse plague in certain parts of Australia because basically I think there's like this there's like a situation that's arisen where it's perfect for mice to breed and some of the video
Starting point is 00:27:00 footage of it is frightening like seriously imagine like turning the light on in a farmer's barn and there are 2,000 mice all just running around right. Okay, yeah, yeah, okay. It was frightening. It reminded me of my late uncle's famous quote in the family. I might have told you this before when my mom, who was his sister, kept digging at him, taking the piss out of him, for being scared of rats.
Starting point is 00:27:29 And he was like, I'm not phobic of rats. And she was like, you are, you've always been phobic of rats. He's like, I'm not phobic of rats. And she kept saying it, and he got pushed to the limit, and then he just blurted out, I'm not phobic of rats. I'm phobic of a gang of rats being led by one rat at the front. Which is like such a specific...
Starting point is 00:27:46 And imagine what that rat would look like, yeah. Fantastic. It's a really specific phobia. Check out the mice plague. It's another reason to not go to Australia. Honestly. If it's if you needed another one. I know.
Starting point is 00:27:59 All right then, we'll be back on the next episode of this show. Fairly obviously. That's kind of how this one works. We'll be back on Monday. Have a lovely weekend. Everybody. Hello, little piti-shore.com is the way to get in touch. And you get in touch via the YouTube comments as well.
Starting point is 00:28:17 We sometimes peruse those, if we're at a loose end, or even a tight end. Say goodbye, lookie more. Goodbye. Goodbye from me, Big Donaldson. Fair thee well. The Luke and Pete Show is a stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

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