The Luke and Pete Show - What's Bono doing?

Episode Date: November 7, 2022

Do you ever just stop and think, what's Bono doing? We ponder that strange question on today's show. We also discuss whether you could invent a glory hole for haircuts and we learn the amazingly appropriate nickname Pete has been given by his niece. It's just another Monday on The Luke and Pete Show.What are the fish and chip shop prices in your local area? We want to know: Email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Luke and Pete show. Do I start every single show by saying welcome, Luke? Yeah. This is upsetting, isn't it? Sorry. I like to think that spiritually the listeners never go away. No, true. They're just hanging out in the ether until the time comes that i have to sit them down and tell them that that uh it is david guetta's birthday it's okay mary curie and david de here so many happy returns

who's made more of a contribution i don't know i mean you know she doesn't do anything curie could she could she um she's never the only scientist to ever win Nobel Prizes in two different scientific disciplines I think yeah she was never good with her feet though was she and her mixing and her mixing has she ever chucked a USB stick into a computer at Coachella no probably not exactly Peter I was going to say to you before you moved on I think you know for my taste a bit too quickly I was going to say the listeners are like those people you told me about in minor characters and video games you stand there like that with their arms outstretched until they're called upon and then they come into the main game does that work for the analogy does it work yeah i guess so yeah it's sort of like it's like um we've got all of these siberian geese at the moment over on South End, kind of like flapping around and squawking.

It's astonishing how far birds fly. I love Siberian geese. Almost, almost. Are they also known as the red-breasted geese? Because if so, they are... Too far away. Don't know. Okay, because they're some of the most beautiful geese in my view.

But carry on. Yeah. Well, they're in... I'm trying to think the... What am I looking at? Who sent me... It might be my dad actually my dad sent me a um a clip of a it was a bird and it was a young bird that broke the distance record for migration nice a five-month-old bartilled godwit flew eight and a half thousand miles in 11 days from Alaska to Tasmania,

which is too much, isn't it? That is too much. Yeah, so that's a really, really good achievement. The Bartow Godwit, for those who don't know, have got a massive, long, slender beak. Quite nice to look at. Look great on the wing as well, which you'd expect because if you're travelling that kind of distance. Look great on the wing as well. Which you'd expect because

travelling that kind of distance, then good on them I say. Peter, I was just thinking to myself I don't know why I thought about this but I was going to say, it's Monday today start of a new week. The nights are drawing in because the clocks have gone back and all the rest of it.

What do you think Bono's doing today? What do you think Bono's doing today? What do you think Bono's doing today? So, do you want me to clarify it further? He's probably thinking about his son's career. Because on Thursday, oh yeah, his son's doing okay. On Thursday, we talked a bit about a Michelin star guide or judge. P.F. Chang.

We started off being about P.F. Chang, but we moved on to that. And we said, you know, they're not realistically going and they're judging meals every night. Yeah. They'd have to keep their powder dry to some extent.

And so it just made me think that famous people, we know them for the famous things they do. But to me, it's interesting to think of what they do as a normal everyday thing like what's their normal day look like you know in the episode of alan partridge where he tells his girlfriend that he knows bono and he takes it to a stately home and says this is bono's house yeah and bono sits in this big four-poster bed with a massive bowl of alpen i just wondered what you thought bono actually is doing right now well i was in a barber shop uh get my ear cut and uh this uh the lady who was cutting

my hair said uh can you can you hear this guy on he was playing on a spotify can you this guy that's uh that's bono's son yeah and i was like and i looked and and and i heard it and i was like i don't think this sounds like the popular indie beat combo inhaler. It's Bon Iver. And she'd got very confused. She'd got very confused about Bon Iver. Conflating the... Bon Iver sounds pretty well out of that.

Bon Iver. I know, I know. Because inhaler a bit. Shit. But it just really made me giggle that she's got it terribly confused so i can only imagine he is um uh greasing the pole for his son to ascend to being a major label and major stage festival concern i've got a couple of things to say on that one is did you see that boniface played wembley arena i want to say last week maybe the week before and he brought Taylor Swift out

he did yes Matt Edmondson on Radio 1 told me about that or was it Emil French on Absolute Radio I can't remember either way somebody

told me about it they told you about it or you were just listening to their show they told me about it through the radio oh right it still counts

it's a very personal video and the second thing is so on Thursday I talked about that band I mentioned a couple of anecdotes about the mayhem one of the guys from the band the drummer i still see he's a good friend of mine and um i think you might actually listen to this show so if you're listening willie hello

to you and i go uh to see him you know semi regularly and we play music together and we hang out and all that good stuff anyway his friend who's now become a friend of mine there's a guy called mark and he used to be a record engineer. And lovely fella. And he actually engineered the Nick Cave album, No More Shall We Part, which is an amazing claim to fame.

He's got some great stories about Nick Cave. They're his stories, not mine. Anyway, the point being, that's a rather long run-up to me saying that he is the first person I've ever met that's actually phobic of having a haircut oh right yeah we'll not get involved in the whole heck no he said to me that the only ever cuts his

own hair or gets his wife to do it and he said to me what should be available as an option which i thought was a pretty interesting idea actually is he said you should have an option to be able to on the website beforehand select a haircut right and just go in and not have to speak to anyone yeah and they just cut your hair and then you go almost like an anonymous idea that like a like a oh you could have like um uh an abandoned uh toilet you just there's a hole in the wall, like a glory hole, and you stick your head through. Where's that come from?

Like a little glory hole, but for haircuts. Yeah, just a big, instead of a little hole for a willy, a big hole for a head. The idea being that, as far as I know, a glory hole is so it's completely anonymous,

it's somewhat disappointing for your anonymity to put your head through it isn't it well you can wear a big mask but you got your head down and they just cut your hair like that what's the point of putting your head through a hole you never need to see anyone you never need to sort of like know that person is and they just chop chop chop chop no you put your head through the hole you're gonna see them what's the point of putting your head through the hole if you're also wearing a mask?

It's just inconvenient. It just gives you a bad back. The hairdresser's got to bend down. It's glory hole for haircuts. Yeah. You just kind of like, you whisper what you want. You just go, I'd like an undercut, please. And you just stick your head through and they do it.

Banner time's not invested in that. And the barber could do several haircuts at the time. As long as you stick your head through the wall at the right angle, I suppose. You are someone who, we've discussed before that you're someone who finds it awkward to get a haircut is it because of the chat yeah it's just it's just endless uh i love the lady who cuts my hair she's so cool yeah she like they're all great but i just i just i just know there's going to be slightly uncomfortable chatter i prefer the turkish barbers where no like

certainly the one near where I got my MRT with my Fiat. I just popped in. He's not doing both things, is he? And they were just shouting at each other

in Turkish and it was just great. I was like, good, no one's talking to me. They're having an argument in Turkish. It's good stuff.

They're probably slagging you off. Probably was, yeah. Look at this fucking loser I'm putting the air off. Why is he bothering? He's fucking on my way out. My hairdresser makes me feel very good about myself because she's really lovely

and a genuinely very nice person. She's got her own business in the area where I live and I'm happy to support her. But she also makes me feel a lot better about myself because she's into things like crystals and astrology and all that kind of stuff. So if I say to her, I'm having a bit of a tough week,

she'll be like, oh, it's okay. It's because Jupiter's in retrograde. Don't blame yourself. And I come away thinking it's nothing to do with me yeah i can't control anything you could say anything and that's fine yeah because the crystals in it did you did you know luke that um yeah like jupiter's in retrograde which means it's very difficult to achieve things i mean part of me admittedly is thinking is it would it be more noticeable if everyone in the world was finding

it hard to achieve something because jupiter was in retrograde because i feel like that should be on the radar it should be factored into like public holidays we should all have a public holiday when jupiter's in retrograde because no one can get anything fucking done why bother pushing exactly fizzling against the wind but then the other part of it must be that she thinks it's maybe only affecting people with my star sign and i just think to myself i mean jupiter is you know it's 10 000 times the radius of earth you know it's a long way away i don't i don't know if it can realistically be affecting me so anyway but she's nice and i like it and i never get it cut by anyone else and I even pay a little bit more than I could elsewhere

to support a local business. Well, I was watching, speaking of tall men with curly hair, I was watching a performance in New York Central Park by Art Garfunkel and Paul Simon. Okay. Is Art Garfunkel actually taller or is it just that Paul Simon's really short? That's the thing I'm talking about, right?

So their whole relationship seemed to sort of like just get fucked up by the fact that each of them thought that the other person was always about to leave due to better offers. You know, one was a songwriter, one wasn't a songwriter, one had offers from Hollywood, one didn't't and so they were just constantly throughout their really

successful few years together they were just constantly thinking that the other one was going to fuck them over right it's just constantly happening right and they didn't enjoy working with each other but a lot of it stemmed from paul simon uh being shot and that was something that art garfunkel on repeated occasions to score a point or two would press a button about his height right and I thought we watched

this wonderful performance from them in Central Park I don't know whether it's the 81 or an earlier performance I think it was the one they did in 1981 when they go back together and Art Garfunkel was in his massive big or an earlier performance. I think it was the one they did in 1981 when they go back together. And Art Garfunkel was in his massive,

big kind of vest. Vest and jean and shoes sort of combo sort of thing. Anyway, and it was stark because all of the people in the park, it wasn't like, let's make as much money as humanly possible and really smash everyone together and get as many people in one place at the same time and make as much money as humanly possible and really smash everyone together and and and you know get

as many people in in one place at the same time and and and and make as much money as possible everyone at the front was just sat down and they had a bit of room about like around each other and no one was going insane and obviously no one's taking photographs all that stuff all that good stuff it was just all it looked really fucking chill and really fun and i guess that's what you got from folksy folk, but it just seemed like a really fun gig that no one was just being a dick at, right? Anyway, and we're watching it,

and so reading up on why they fell out, it was like, big parts of it were that Paul Simon physically was not as big as Art Garfunkel, right? And I thought, well, how tall are those two people? Now, Paul Simon is 5'3", right? Yeah. Art Garfunkel is 5'9". He's not even that tall.

He's average at best. Yeah, he's like two bald men fighting over a comb. He looks really tall, but it's only because Paul Simon is tiny. So, I mean, why anyone... I mean, that is particularly short, yeah. But it just made me laugh that it was like, oh my God, like, I can't go as far as tall.

He's literally just a lick over my head. I love it because it's a dispute that only can really exist between the two of them because every other person they're going to meet, every other man they're going to meet is more than likely to be taller than them yeah exactly it's like they always said

to Andre the Giant never hang out with basketball players because they're all going to be taller than you and you're supposed to be a giant it would destroy

the legacy the image and I think also it's a remarkable thing so I didn't actually know that about them but I did know of course that

Paul Simon wrote all the songs and you think to yourself I understand that insecurity is something that can drive people forward and can be used positively. Why are you fucking bothered? You're Paul Simon for quite a while.

I mean, Garfunkel's not contributing to anything other than just singing. He's the organ grinder. You're the monkey. You're the organ grinder. He's the monkey. It's kind of funny that. I think what happens is this happens a lot with bands and all the rest of it. It's rarefied atmospheres, isn it it's like cabin thievery type stuff these tiny things become

actually quite important because you're in each other's pockets all the time and to other people it just seems like complete completely pointless like waste of time and unbelievably petty but then i guess that kind of is what happens in marriages and relationships and stuff we mentioned that well we alluded to that on Thursday, didn't we? No one really knows apart from the people involved. Yeah. Very, very strange stuff. I mean, at that point that I learned that, I said, I mean, look, I mean,

our Garfunkel, he's only an inch over average. And then Sarah Googled what the actual average was in the UK. It is five foot nine. Yeah. Absolutely fuming. I said, get some more stats and then she looked some more stats up.

Peace in the Daily Telegraph, BBC, they all said five foot nine. What are you? And I got measured two weeks ago and I am five foot eight and a half.

That's a shame. That is a shame, isn't it? That is a shame. Is Art Garfunkel including his hair in that? I know, exactly.

I would want very much to... That's stocking feet and shaved head for me. Top of the palette. So that's exactly right. So how do they get the average? Because there's no way they're making everyone in the country take their shoes off. That's true, yeah. It's funny because I'm 6'3", but I've got a lot of small man energy, haven't I?

Quite aggressive. Quite a petty man man that's why our albums suck yeah you're the others yeah this is the thing you're this you're the big you're the big songwriter here you're the one who creates all the content i'm just the one who fucking says everyone look at him and so it works for us as well but thankfully you're not as insecure as paul simon i think well just about different things do you know what's really what really taints simon and garfunkel for me is that this isn't going to be a completely bizarre story so i apologize in advance but i promise you this is true when i went to college to do media where i met marcus and um

i think i might have met jim around that time but anyway i also met chris who was one of the original presenters of the ramble and anyway i we i used to be i played for the football team for a bit and i i was i was involved in some of the social events on campus all that kind of stuff as you can imagine a 19 year old me would be and um well there was this one night where they used to do like a it was like a karaoke thing but they it was there at the student union but it was like their thing was they used to really jazz it up so they would do like they would dress the stage and they would do like backing singers and all this kind of cool stuff right it was kind of like a prototype thing for

you know xfm you should do where you could do karaoke with a full band it was kind of like that that's right yeah that was so cool i love that so anyway it was run by this guy called brett i'm not going to use a surname because I've got no beef with the guy. But anyway, he was the events manager for the union, but he was in his 30s at the time. You know the type I mean. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he's hanging around with a lot of 19-year-olds,

the usual story. He used to organise all these events, obviously, and then every... This sounds mental now, but I promise you this is true it didn't really kind of register at the time but I mean in retrospect it just seems ridiculous he used to do for his birthday he used to make his birthday at

the student union a really big deal and he used to do an evening with Brett where you could be invited along or you would pay or whatever and he would do like um you know like you see him on itv now like almost like a audience with shirley bassey or whatever yeah he would do that but it's bad it is mad obviously but he would ask people to come up and do the do the karaoke

thing and sing with him and all the rest of it yeah and um he asked me and a couple of others for absolutely no reason, impromptu on the night to do Bridge Over Troubled Water with him by Simon and Garfunkel, which at the time being 19, I think I only just really only knew it because my parents had it on vinyl.

I didn't really know the song. And he just made me do it. And it was so embarrassing that now, even now, like 20 years later later i can't even really kind of not think about that every time it comes on the radio or something so my simon and garfunkel kind of chances of ever being a fan of theirs is tainted by a provincial man called brett who uh basically made me out to be a bellend on stage when everyone knew then and now i'm

perfectly capable of doing that myself did you did you sing the high parts or the low parts i think i just can't remember there was four of us to be fair so it wasn't just me but i think i just mumbled my way through it i didn't even know the tune really i was i was uh with my um two nieces at the weekend and it was my mum's 70th birthday, bless her, and she and we were watching The Lion King 2. Right. And my sister and, bless her, her husband Mark,

they're not the most technically able, bless them, and they, I'm just going to say bless them so many times. Do you mean the one, sorry to cut in but I'd be a pedant, but do you mean the one that kind of, the straight to video one, not the remake live action one? Yes, the straight to video one not the remake live action yes the straight to video one yeah it's basically dealing with the son of scar uh getting in a relationship with the son of uh well is it called simba's pride and it's got nev camber's price so simba's in charge of the pride yeah simba's got a daughter, and she's keen on Scar's grandkid or kid, I don't know, whatever.

But completely unlovable. The animation was dreadful. The frame rate on it was just rank. It was just all a bit shit. You weren't sadness during them watching it, were you? No, no, no. Emma is obsessed with it, and she watches it. Like every kid, they just watch it about five or six times.

They just will not stop watching it yeah and so emma's all the way through going pete what's uh uncle uncle computer watch this um she calls you uncle computer uncle computer uh watch this watch this does she really call you that yeah and uh she says watch this bit uh he's all right though in the end though and he joins up with another Pride, and they're going to fall in love, and I'm like, just let me, here, let me watch it. Bless you, bless you. But they had, on the telly,

they had Swedish subtitles that they could not get rid of. Like, they could not get rid of. Could Uncle Computer sort it or not? Uncle Computer sorted it. Uncle Computer fixed it and changed it to English subtitles. And so watching that, and the song comes on.

And because the song is so, like, it's not Elton John quality circle of life. It is some absolute jobbing musicians creating these monstrosities for The Lion King 2, Simba's Pride. And the lyrics are on the screen. So I'm sort of singing, even though I've never seen the song before. Yeah. And Emma's like, have you seen this before? And I'm going,

no, I'm just reading the words. So, in many ways, I was doing what you were doing on stage, but you didn't really have the words. Disrespectful to Lady Smith, Black Man Barzo, and Tina Turner, by the way. That was not on Lion King 2.

They were not. Apparently they feature on it. They were never heard. I won't have this. Friend of Paul Simon, the aforementioned PS feature I've just looked it up. They were never heard. I won't have this. Friend of Paul Simon the aforementioned PS. I've just been I've actually been

I've actually been stitched up on the same thing by a niece of mine as well because when my sister got married my niece would have been

I don't know probably four. Right. And they got married in Santorini and the first night everyone got there the family and friends they organized a karaoke night um just a bit of an ice break a really good idea it was a great night in the end but um betsy my niece decided that she wanted to

sing the lion kings i just can't wait to be king yeah karaoke and she said and it would have worked perfectly let me tell you something it would have been an absolute dream because she wanted me to be Zazu perfect Rowan Atkinson can do that sarcastic English accent bit she's got a child's voice so she can do Simba

we're in business she watches it every day she knows it like the back of her hand so we get called up Betsy and me song starts diddle-a-diddle-a-diddle-a-diddle

diddle-a-diddle-a-diddly diddly do yeah she freezes it happens she freezes just let you get on with it she freezes um you know i've obviously got a little bit of experience on the stage pete as you well know uh so i step up end up doing both voices i think i managed to carry it off i mean people weren't walking, but it's not easy to flip between, you know, Zazu and Simba. No, exactly. And Betts was with me the whole time I was carrying her. So she was there with the mic, didn't say a thing. And also, you don't know whether some of the accents in The Lion King that you're doing is a bit off to do these days.

Simba and Zazu's fine. Zazu's basically like an aristocratic kind of, you know, like Englishman. That's fine. Yeah, some of the other stuff. If you start doing the mandrill or whatever the hell it is. Yeah, yeah.

I think he's got quite a strong accent. It's like, what am I doing? What am I doing? Well, if there's one thing you and I can both agree on, Pete, as we go into the break here, is you can't say anything these days, can you? You really can't.

Cancel us, Walk Police! We're back with the Luca Pitcher. I'm Pete Donaldson, joined by Mr. Lukey Moa. Despite not being able to say anything these days, we'll probably do another ten minutes. We'll do another ten minutes and you're going to fucking listen to it, all right? I don't care, we're doing the karaoke.

So in summary, just before the break, the old karaoke thing, I've had time to reflect in the ad break and I do still think she was out of order. Well, when she grows up old enough, you can really

put her down and really shout at her. I love her dearly and it was still a great moment and it didn't, did it stop me getting back up

and doing Call Me maybe about an hour later? No, it didn't. So, you know. True that. Well, we had like, we had the kids were very much

having a sweet time at the weekend, and my dad was on very, very good form, like astonishingly good form. Great. When we got to the pub for a bit of food, he decided to... He was regaling us with stories of the pool when he was a kid. It was like a miner's pool that was basically where all of the runoff that they'd pumped out of the out of the um out of the mine right then the the miners had funded this kind of like municipal pool

effectively right but it was filled with silt and soot and and basically all the shit that came out of the mine at the bottom in seum right and uh this is already depressing it's really really depressing but i was like so he said it was just sludge at the bottom I said well could they not have got rid of the sludge he was going yeah probably but apparently all of like

the Olympic hopefuls because there was very few he was really proud of the fact they had like a I don't know a 10 metre hard board

a 100 metre you know he was obsessed with how big the boards were I was like yeah dad but you're diving

into like pool with like loads of heavy metals in it and stuff it's not ideal at all really it's a wonder so my grandad

tells a story about how he used to spend a lot of his time playing in the bomb craters during the second world war

when he was a kid right okay and then he also used to so have you heard the phrase black as pitch yes

you know what pitch is right it's like a black tar isn't it yeah he said that he said that like his parents used to give him pitch to like chew on when he was hungry yeah i think that's all right though isn't it it's just bits of still dinosaurs in it it's all all dinosaurs he's 91 in two weeks he's still fine he's still driving his car he's still chewing it yeah he also i mean

speaking of um speaking of having it tough back in the day, I think he was born in 1931. His mother was 15 when he was born. She gave birth to him at home with no medical intervention. And he and his two brothers and six sisters lived in a two-room house. And he was evacuated during the war to the countryside with his cousin. I need to get some room. They ran away.

I can't believe it. They ran away, what, from the people who took them in? From the evacuation house. They got put in with a family out in the countryside in the West Country or somewhere.

He was about 11, something like that. Yeah. And his cousin was, I think, 13. They ran away and made their way all the way back to Portsmouth. That's a...

What? Yeah. Kids just managed to get away. Yeah. Instead of just following the railway tracks. I mean, it shits on my dad walking all the way back from Sunderland one time. How long's that? Not very far.

Not very far at all. Not certainly the West Country back to Portsmouth. That's incredible. Yeah, he also tells a story of my grandad. I might have mentioned this to you before, where his dog got mange or something. Right. Well, he had a dog that he just found,

and it started following him around, and he became his dog, and he'd done all this paper around and stuff when he was like 12 or 13 or whatever it was. And his dog got mange. Didn't know what was wrong with it, so he took it to his mum. I guess his dad was away at war or whatever. His mum said, yeah, it's got mange, you know what was wrong with it So he took it to his mum I guess his dad was Was away at war or whatever

His mum said Yeah it's got mange You have to get it put down She made him walk to the vet And get it put down himself Oh That's er That's old school innit

That is old school Stuff Tough It's tough going that It's tough going Yeah I know I would find that hard With any of my pets now

And I'm 42 Go and do it yourself And go and out loud That would be Wow That would be and i'm 42 go and do it yourself and cry out loud that would be that would be my wife telling me go and do it yourself anyway well so it's tough it's tough back in the day i know i just go the dorden colliery pool the pit pool was filled with the warm water uh they used to cool the colliery air compressors with uh pumping it from mine into pool what's the name of it again dorden colliery colliery uh it was uh it was a very famous diving center where people would just dive off massive uh yeah to be fair it looks fucking massive um during uh the pool was quite black and divers never wanted to go to the bottom

of this deep pool for fear of meeting something unknown waiting to grab them jesus christ uh we needn't worry during a visit at the time of the pool's demolition it was experienced that the pool had a very smooth nice concrete bottom why was it black then why was it sludgy and black at the bottom

for crying out loud get rid of that sludge just have nice clean water wasn't there famously a massive explosion at the CM Colliery back in the day

oh I don't know that was a big thing wasn't it you're talking about CM right yeah yeah yeah probably I mean

my dad was down the pit as recently into the 70s so yeah was your dad down the pit in 1880 when it happened it's hard to tell

I can't tell with him he tells some tall tales he was 160 people died apparently he was showing us he was showing a fucking

did you see that a couple of weeks ago that that crushing itty on it the Halloween oh my god that was awful

so bad so like so like that I can understand how that fucking happened because it is just the world's smallest concentrated night spot

in a small have you been there yeah small little sort of sort of walkway basically bars on each side just really I mean some of the pictures yeah small little sort of sort of walkway basically bars on each side

just really I mean some of the pictures were fucking atrocious I don't know how they managed to I mean real

whenever anything like this happens it's absolutely atrocious but I mean South Korea is not we're not talking like you know

middle of fucking nowhere this is that is a major capital city in the East. It's a disgrace. Really sad. And everyone would have been kids. Everyone would have been kids.

Right. Halloween's just, they love Halloween out there. And fuck me, it's just absolutely dreadful. I'm not really sure what to say to that, Peter. Sorry. I agree. I mean, I agree with you. So hit the email button.

Whenever we have a little yeah we have to do a vote fast let's let's just stick an email in there uh hello to uh lewis hello lewis save yourself the pain radio head style um hello boys having you having recently discovered the show i've been working my way through your back catalogue how dare you lewis i'm enjoying regular updates regarding pete's contempt for his own digestive system. Agree, that's a big part of the show. If you're interested in finding a worthy adversary to Pete and his wacky food creations, I suggest

you look into at superpedjason on Instagram. Each meal posted on this man's Instagram is a different kind of war crime, and he's doing this with alarming frequency. Keep up the good work, chaps, my best,

Lewis, I'm just going to type, super ped Jason, into Instagram, it's kind of his thing right, he posts, like, controversial meals,

yeah, and so the most recent one, is a chicken tikka slice, with cheese and tomato sauce, for cheese, like, on top of a, of a,

of a curry, he's also got, a pepperoni pizza where he's added mayonnaise on it and bacon which is not too bad i suppose no i'm i'm looking at one here that's a normal roast with pork pork belly and gravy and yorkshires i mean you don't pork belly's a bit too bit too oily for that kind of vibe. But the thing that's probably going to upset people, instead of roasties, he's gone with a potato waffle. I do love a potato waffle, but I'm not, I'm not, I'm not putting one in a roast dinner. No. There's nothing, I mean, maybe I'm looking with my eyes, my disgusting eyes.

I mean, nothing looks particularly unappetizing uh one of his meals which i really loved so he's put a meal up he's obviously a meal guy everything he does is a meal the meal he's put up on one of them is beef flavored monster munch in a bowl with a massive carton of strawberry milk a huge bar of dairy milk chocolate a bowl of wine gums and two chocolate eclairs two chocolate eclairs what a what a finisher what do you know the most controversial thing i saw on twitter recently was someone had accidentally it was one of those things where everyone's got a gap in their knowledge right so it's almost like you can't possibly know everything obviously and and things that are common or garden or just accepted as knowledge aren't or doesn't always reach every corner of the country and maybe it's just passes people by and it had become quite

clear this particular guy had responded to sharing to request to share photos of his um of his fry up right yeah and he had and he obviously based on i think it's been deleted now but based on the replies he was completely oblivious and i actually felt quite sorry for him at the end he had he'd obviously be in the habit of putting garden peas in his fry up yeah so he had baked beans and also garden peas and like obviously you know people are like what the fuck are you do get in jail get in jail now yeah is it worse than what super super jason uh ate 29 weeks ago smoked ham crab sticks cheese tuna crackers cheese triangles couldn't be bothered cooking lovely that's not i think he's doing that for i think he's doing that just to just to just to get a rise out of people

to be honest you shared a plate with me a while back and you had crab sticks and gravy on the same plate did I? it was something horrific you had to load stuff up the fridge and put it on the plate because it was late it was horrendous mate

he looks like pretty much all of the Timeline scholars together in one picture. He's posted a picture of him and his dog, and his dog looks actually quite ill. And you would know. And I'd know. But yeah, he's...

I think some of it he's doing for effect, but some of the stuff I don't have a problem with, to be honest. I was just trying to think of some controversial food thing that I do that people would say is... So I tell you one thing i do do which people won't won't respect and i'll stick my i'll stick my neck on the chopping block here just because you know it's only fair let's criticize other people i am i'm fine with mushy peas i don't mind them but i would much rather have baked beans with my fish and chips

uh too too sweet to water yeah yeah there'll be people out there who'll be upset about that won't there I like I do like

we're going to lose subscribers from me saying that I do like mushy peas but I'm not sure I would necessarily you know if I've got the choice they're not going

anywhere near my fish and chips to be honest just loads of vinegar I'll have a Wally uh and some gravy slash curry sauce so you've got something wet on there yeah so i won't have baked beans if we're having curry sauce the curry sauce in our local chip is really good so if there's curry sauce available we'll get a bit of that but i'll tell you what i will say this about kennedy's is a chip shop near me i don't can they come after me legally if they want i don't fucking care they gouge their prices on the fucking deliveroo

right i bet they do yeah because you they double it double it they double it man that's heavy on friday night it's that award it's in the warbling place it's amazing it is a brilliant fish and chip shop and people come from all over south london but on Friday night, mate, if you're not there by 6.30, it's probably a 30-person queue down the road. Yeah. Do you get your food quicker if you go on Deliveroo, though? Yeah, you do. But check it out, though.

You'll not believe this. And people who are listening outside of our fair capital, you know, brace yourselves here. Let me tell you something now. Guess how much it is. Right, I'm going to do your little price guess here. Give me a little price guess here. Let me just go... now. Guess how much it is. I'm going to do you a little price guess here.

Give me a little price guess here. Are you on the Deliveroo? I'm on it now. I'm not going to order, but I'm on it now. Guess how much it is on Deliveroo for a medium, not even a large, a medium cod. And you only get the cod, not the chips, nothing else. Just one piece

of battered, medium cod. Guess how much it is on Deliveroo in Kennedy's. With a London premium, I'd say that's nine quid. £13.55. The largest, 15 quid. That is... So you could be... One serving of fish and chips could be 20 quid.

Guess how much it is for one large portion of chips on Deliveroo there. One large portion is £3. roux there? One large portion is £3.50. £5.50. £5.50. It's just a paper bag of chips. This is what

a fish and chip shop has to go through when they're running money through the box properly instead of taking cash and all that every other fucking fish

and chip. This is how much a professional one actually charges because all the rest of them are cashing in. What I would say is this, right? Obviously, it's not compulsory.

You don't have to go there. Technically, I'm not ripping anyone off because people choose to go there. And it is the best one around. And it's still absolutely rammed. So they're doing it because they can. And I don't necessarily, in principle, have a problem with that. There's another fish and chip shop just here,

which isn't as good. And it's much, much cheaper cheaper but no one really goes there so i mean you've got more money than sense we don't really go there that often but if you go into the shop it's like seven quid for a fish right okay that's more that's more but it's a london premium though you know i'm i'm i'm i i must admit like uh when we went up north to Cheadle, around Stockport where, the prices, I know you've got to put up with the rain and stuff,

but the price is just so much more what I would usually pay for some calamari. That's not the reason the prices are cheaper. What do you mean? Well, you can't judge that. It's been raining today. People don't say that. That's not the thought process, is it?

Anyway, I'd love to know what people who are listening to Chip Shop Prices are. It's a big part of British culture, in my view. But Peter, we should probably leave, and we'll promise our dear Luke and Pete Show family that we'll be back on Thursday, because we always are. But before we go, don't just turn it off,

because I'm about to start the outro. Listen to this. Please leave us a five-star review wherever you get your pods. That helps us a great deal. We appreciate that. And if you want to get in touch, it's at Luke and Peach on socials and hello at LukeandPeach.com

on the email. I think that's it for the admin and that's it for this week's show or this Monday's show. Thank you very much, Pete Donaldson. Farewell, everyone. And thank you very much from me too. It's goodbye from me as well.

Speak to you soon. Goodbye. Got a scalp in my hand. You've got a scalp in my hand. You have got a scalp in your hand. Where's that come from? I was cutting my toenails with it. Bye, everyone. See you later. the luke and pete show is a stack production and part of the acast creator network