The Matan Show - Crip Mac Crashes Out and Threatens To Attack Matan

Episode Date: April 26, 2026

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Free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming, Ontario. Hello everybody. Welcome back to the podcast for today's guest. We have Creeb Mac. Welcome in. Do you that Prip Mac? I think you do.

I'm here. Thanks for coming. Oh, yeah. Most crap. For today's co-host, we have my manager, Vara Floring. Welcome in Vara Floring. Vyroir. How are you, buddy?

Can you, yeah, pull the mic close to your mouth and then introduce yourself to anybody who might not know you and all that? Well, those snoo don't know, Snoo I am. I'm the 50-fist through Loke General. I'm baby crazy mad-ass crap. And whatever language is that?

It's cribbing. Creepin? Cripping. Cripping. Is it similar to English? Because I hear some English, but also... C-R-I-P, motherfucker. Crip!

You say it with a lot of enthusiasm. Cripp! I'm proud of it. Okay, what is it... For maybe those who might not know, what is a Crip. A Crip is a blue rag, gang, bach, an extra out, motherfucker. And can they have white people, or no? They can't if they come to get they put on.

And what does that mean? When they come... Yeah. About an hour and a... About an hour, huh? They come get they put on. How much is it per hour to hire you at my nephew's birthday party?

Your nephew, seat eight party, kid. Give me $5.55 an hour. $5.55? That's pretty expensive. That's more than a m-a-kid even, and those guys are crazy with their prices. How many hours does you plan on me stay? About an hour and a half.

Give me... Mm, a thousand and $555, who. That's way more than $555 an hour. You just like up the price, I'm like... Up the price, that's not... No, give me $5.55, but you've got to send it all now. But you'll do the full hour and a half for $5.55? Yeah, you got to give me the date and the time and all the shit, though.

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possibilities, iced, flavored, long, short, because some days call for that espresso kick, and sometimes a smooth, silky latte just wins. It's exceptional but effortless, like actually effortless. Simply press, brew, and explore. Nispresso, what else? Keep exploring at nespresso.com. It seemed like about a week and a half. Well, give me the date, the time, and send the dollars in, because I'm going to make it happen. Okay, if someone gave you $100,000, How long would it take before you were back at zero? I ain't going to give it out if I'm nobody. I'm going to save a lot of it.

You will invest it in such things? I'll put it where I know it's going to invest. It makes sense. And where would that be? Well, helping the homeless, helping nursing homes. But you won't get any money back for that. It's not really a great investment. You put it out.

You do it out of the kindness of your cripple-heart. Oh, so, well, that still kind of answers the question. How long until your back? at zero. You may use the money for good things, but how long... Really bad's gonna happen in about an hour. Are you threatening, you piece of shit? Where'd you get this piece of shit from?

This is Mike, Mike. Get cut a fuck up out of you. You're a jack. Certified. Do you speak like that as a joke or is there actually something wrong with you? No, this is really me in real life. You think it's comedy, it's not. So you're not playing a character or something like that? I'm not a character.

I'm a g-gain-banger. Why is a g-gabinger? You know what a gangbanger is. The motherfucker is you were scared of when you were a kid. Well, I didn't live around those, you know, gangbangers. I feel like I know what it is, but I've heard different explanations a couple different times. Yeah. No, no, it's just creeping.

Just gaffirping, you know. It is what it is. Do you play as Torbjorn in Overwatch? Do I what? Excuse me? Do you play as Torbjorn in Overwatch? I don't know what the fuck that is. Is that the character you play with or who do you do?

What? In Overwatch. I don't play that game Oh you don't I thought that's kind of the whole thing With the Cribs they all play Overwatch No So what do you play and what do they play

What do you mean what I play If not Overwatch then what What do I play? I don't understand I play a game you can never play What's that A play ball game you can never play Basketball?

No I'm a football player For the Falcons from the Falcons. And when you play football, do you play a starbjorn? No, I'll just play football on the streets. No, it's a tactic. Was that a reference to like killing somebody? I don't really know.

No, no, I don't do stuff like that. I'm a great man. And what is that tattoo on your face symbolize? I see you have a five. I'm a five black general, Infantloke General from 55th Street. I thought that maybe was like how old you thought you were, something like that?

I'm a five black, 55th or infantloak general from 55th straight. So it's a lot of numbers, five. It's like kind of a mental. Hey, you're going to shut the fuck up. I'm going to get your ass up out of here. Get them out of here. Out of the interview.

The fuck up out of here. You got to go. Get cousins out of here. What do you do? I'm schizophrenic and paranoid with this weird motherfucker around me. You flip that bottle again. I'm getting your ass up out of here.

That's finished the interview. Your schizophrenic? Oh, yeah. Most definitely. I don't want to weird shit. around me like that. Something bad is going to happen and I'll get the fuck up out of here.

But maybe something bad is going to happen to him. That's not my fucking problem. Don't continue to say that around me. Were you diagnosed by a doctor as a schizophrenic? Schizophrenic and paranoia and cypolar a little. I'm a great guy.

Feed the homeless. I help people when I stand on citizens. It's a gangbagger. I don't really understand why people have issues with the schizophrenic. You know what I mean? Because actually a lot of the times they're seeing stuff that we can't.

Yeah. We see great things. What do you usually see? Well, I see great people. So actually your schizophrenia is a good thing. You're seeing people that you like. No, great people. Okay.

Yeah, great future. Great future. Great future. Okay, we have a little game show I wanted to do with you. It's called Are You Smarter than a Fourth Grader? Have you ever seen those shows they do on the street like that? Smarter than a fifth grader. So I'm going to ask you some math questions, and then you're going to answer them to your best ability.

Oh, shit. Alright, let's try. Three times 4.5. It's 12.5, I think, huh? No, it's not. But? Yes, it is. Motherfucker, it is.

It's 13.5. But? No, it's not. No, you're lying. No, it's on the paper. You're full shit. I'll give you a pen and paper if you want to help you do the math. But we'll move on to the next one, because you got that one wrong.

That's 12.15. It's 12.5. It's 12 and a half. No. Well, I thought it was. We're going to move on. That's what I say. This one is.

4 plus 46. 4 plus 46. That's 48. 4 plus 46, right? I think it might be 48. 4 plus 46. Something really bad. It's going to happen in about an hour and a half.

All right. What else? Zero minus three. Zero. That's a tough one. No, it's not. It's negative that number. Zero minus three?

What did that come out to? Minus seven? That's correct. It is, huh? Yes. Could you start down from 10? Exactly. I actually have a reward because you got it right.

What reward, yeah? You get a video game. You get Anselm, the video game, Ansome, released by Bio. There's more to life than find. Finding the perfect car. But finding the perfect car can help you get the most out of life. Like the SUV that handles everything

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on the weekend. She plays video games. She's 28 years old. I'll give her it. She'll enjoy it. What's the relevance of her age? I want to let you know just because she plays video games. She's a grown woman. She's 28. Oh, you thought I might assume she was like a minor. Well, I just want to make sure you know she's a grown woman.

But you would not do anything with minors, of course. No, I'm a gangbanger. A real gangbanger. What is gangbanger? I still don't understand. I feel like... I'm a real crip. I don't do shit like that. That's against code? It's against the code, huh? Okay.

We have a couple more math questions, okay? 3 plus 3 4ths Make sure you're talking into the mic by the way Six-four like an Impala No I don't think so I don't think it's six four Give me another gift you have from under there That's when you get it right okay I'll give you another one just to get you play Give me the best gift you have we're gonna have a friendly fade right in this fucking place on camera

The video game anthem by bioware You just gave me the shit I'm sell the other one Fuck you. All right, let's just play. Okay, three plus three-fourths. Oh, shit. Six-four. How do you get to six-four?

What, six-point-four? Three, three or six. And a four, six-four and power, a low-rider. You know, you think of some stuff I couldn't even think of. So it's like you're actually way ahead of me in some way. I'm ahead of the ball game. That's correct. Can't nobody catch up.

I'm not even close to catch you. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You got it right, so I'll give you another gift. All right, another gift. What does she have? The video game Anthem released by BioWare, critically unclear. I'm selling both of these games and giving the big booty sitch this game. I think you'll get much for that, but maybe you can have it as like a collector.

I swear you'll buy it. Fuck it. Okay, this is a tough one. Are you ready? Xbox one? Whatever. Fuck. Five plus four minus one.

One plus one. Hold on. Five plus nine minus one. Plus one. Eight. You actually, that was really quick. You got it right immediately. Holy shit.

Another game by anthem, huh? Fuck that game. I'm trying to give you a gift. I don't want it. Keep these. You keep those. What are you going to do with the other two besides the one you're giving to your girls? The big booty sitch.

What would you do with the other two? Oh, we can donate to the homeless. So then why not donate three? Oh, you're right. Homeless. You know what? They might have an Xbox out there in the tent somewhere.

Why not donate six? Five is the magic number, so you take one back. No, you can donate another one to the homeless. The homeless don't give a shit about your street rules. And they also don't give a shit about Anthem. What the fuck is? They're going to think that's a piece of food or something. You might end up killing each homeless person you give one to.

They're going to choke to death. No, no, than that. They're great people. That might be great. Okay, well, anyways, you actually, if I had to give you like a grade rating on that math test, I'd say you got like an A minus. You need a very good job. I'd rather get a C plus.

C plus for CREP Mac? Yes, Cripping. Cripp Mac. And he's Creep Mac like a play on Big Mac? Is there some relation there? No, no, no, it's just Cripping Mac. Because you really like Big Macs or something like that? No, just the crazy mad-ass Crips.

The name I got put on with C-Max. C-Mac loco. But what does Mac stand for? Mad-ass Crip. Crazy mad-ass Crips. Crip, Cripp's already the first word, so you're repeating. Mad-ass, crazy, mad-ass Crip.

The most Cripping can get is a crazy Crip. It's me. No, but you're saying Crip, mad-ass Crip. There's already a-crazy mad-mad-A C-Rae from. I'm a great guy. You didn't add another C. C-M-A-C-C-MAC. CREC-MAC.

No, like Creepin, they need to play on Big Mac because... No, they ain't got no fucking simulations and no McDonald's bullshit. It's because it's your favorite burger. No, it's because I'm a motherfucker fucking crazy mad ass crib but there's no C for crazy you're not understanding Crip stands for creep obviously and the craziest starts with a C

C you're not a it's okay they're fucking changed the subject have you ever considered becoming a professor at Harvard to share your wealth of knowledge no why is that's never in my interest but they'll pay you a lot of money I don't give a fuck but don't you think you could help people by sharing your extreme knowledge on the world no It's never in my interest Why is it not in your interest It's just not

It's not what I'm doing in life Okay I guess that's actually a pretty fair answer And why don't all the gangs make up and become friends It's impossible It'll never happen Why? Got so much violence and rival shit going on

It can never happen But doesn't it seem a little childish Did all these grown men are concerned with colors It's kind of like Preschool stuff It's not. It's part of gangbion. It's what life is. It don't get no better. Oh, it's a good life you're saying to live. It's not a good life, but it's our life. We love it. We can't get enough of it.

At what point did you decide you wanted to be a gangster? Teenager. A hudster, yeah. And how did you get into it? Were you born into it or what? No, I got older cousins as Crips. So you're born into it, sort of. No, my older cousins is Crips. So, yeah, I've seen them when I was young. Crips. That's all it is. Crips. You're inspired by him?

Crippin, yeah. Do they offer you a salary, or how does that work? No, you don't get shit from it. You just stand on Cisnes with this shit. You stand with scissors? Stand with a C's shit. Stand on Cisness. You stand on business with a motherfucking C.

Oh, I get it. You like including C in all of those words. That's the best letter in the world. You're like Rick Glassman. Do you know him? Huh? You're like Rick Glassman. Yeah, see?

Coo-Chi sounds starts with C. You like Coochie? Yeah, I get it. That's exactly the type of thing you're saying. Let's see you something great. Shit. Is your behavior a result of rabies? No.

But you're a paranoid schizophrenic, right? That's just normal. It's me. What? It's just me. No, I know, but it's just you, but why is it you? That's how I was born. It's part of the world. So nothing to do with rabies.

You weren't beaten by a dog or anything. No, I was never bitten by a dog. What are you doing? doing over here get the fuck away from me well he's helping with the mic oh is he helping the strange smile on his face is just strangest you don't like his face i don't like that strange would you let he it's something else here now something new from exclusively on paramount plus it's the series stephen king calls scary as hell everything here is impossible but it's also real sci-fi vision goes it the best show streaming right now we're running out of time and we still don't know the rules

Don't miss what the movie blog calls something you need to watch. Saving those children is how we all go home. From Binge All episodes exclusively on Paramount Plus. You can never join the club. And you guys get together, did you guys get together on Club Penguin when that was around? No. But then you get to hang out with all your friends as penguins. No, we don't do shit left bit.

Why? That's not Cripping. It's not gang. It says who? Me. Are you the leader? Who gets to this? Besides such a thing. I got a hell of a fucking rank over there.

I'm somebody. Well, maybe then you can make the change and then allow that. I would never allow fucking people to hang with penguins. No, you are the penguin. I'm not the penguin. I'm a crap.

They become a penguin. And you can even choose what color. You can become, what do you want to be? You're a fucking penguin. Yeah, I was. Yeah, but then they shut the game down. Yeah, you're a penguin. They shut the game down.

Put on a pink dress and cut your hair off. That's what you need to do. No, but I'm not obsessed with the colors and stuff. And what color do you like? You like red or black? blue. Everything blue, nothing else. It's just blue. Only blue? Only blue? But you're not really wearing blue, right? That seems to be... The shoes are blue, but this is kind of black.

No, this is navy blue. You can't see it. You're a colorblind motherfucker? No. This is navy blue. That's a dark blue. It's a light blue. So why don't you tattoo yourself blue? This is a blue. No, I'm already blue. I'm blue enough. I'm as blue as a blue devil. No, you're black. I'm blue. No, but your skin is not black. Not blue, it's black. Yeah, but I'm blue.

But if you tattoo yourself blue, then maybe they'll give you a higher ranking. Shit, I've cracked on most shit than anybody. I have the highest rank. You were selling crap, you said? Oh, no, no, no. You were selling crap. Give me my goddamn game. Quit playing.

Don't let them take those games from you. Mine's. Keep those safe, okay? Those are worth a lot of money, actually. They're half them games. What is an anthem game? It looks like a game. It's like robots.

Are you able to read? What is it say in the back? Oh, I can read. I can definitely read. You don't think I can read? What does it say? Alcohol, reference, the language, mouth, use of tobacco, and violence.

That's correct. I can read. You are way, way, way smarter than his fourth grader. I know I am. I'm smarter than a fifth grader. That's correct. Correct. Yeah.

Do you think you could beat a four-year-old of chess? I don't play chess. A four-year-old? I don't play chess. I know, but the guy is four years old. I don't play it. Neither does the four-year-old, but he's four. I don't even know how to play chess.

Okay, well, they teach you. They tell you the moves beforehand. No, I don't want to play. They'll pay you if you beat him. They'll give you anthem. No, I don't want to. No, no. Why are you so opposed to that?

It's not my type of thing. Can't do that type of shit in life. No, you can't do it. It'll make you schizophrenic. Oh, that's even worse. I'm already there. So how does that work? Are you on medication?

No, you don't take medication. Oh, so you're just screwed? Yep. HK. Screw loose. Just screwed. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh. What is the main?

ingredient in ketchup? I don't give a fucking, I don't know. What do you mean you don't know? I feel like it's, come on. I don't know. Sugar, shit. I don't know. Sugar and fucking tomato paste. That's it, huh? That's correct. Give me another fucking anthem game.

Hurry up. I go a lot. I gave them all to you at the end of that. What was your other fucking gifts? There's no other gifts. A piece of paper? A piece of paper. No, I got your collection. I ran out of gifts.

What shape do you think the earth is? What shape has five sides? What shape has five sides? A platyagon. No, I think a Pentagon. No, that's the government building. But Pentagon is five sides, right? No, the Pentagon is a government building.

How many sides is the Pentagon have? Probably a bunch of different sides. It's a huge building that you're not allowed in unless you're a high-ranking official in the government or somehow have access. Not even a gangbass. I think that's the last guy they would let in the Pentagon.

It has five sides, I think. So why not let a nifty mickle in? Because... That's actually a great idea. Yeah. Hey, guys, sorry for the interruption. I have to let you know that today's episode is sponsored by prize peaks.

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I get cracking mode in the popcorn machine at the fucking theater. You did more crap than the popcorn machine? I get cracking more than the popcorn machine. I have no idea what you're trying to say. But don't worry. But you know,

you're really excited about it and I like it. Huh? I just like your enthusiasm. Oh, yeah. I'm a great guy. But what I was saying is the question is actually more interesting than you might think

because that's the surface level. A popcorn machine doesn't have consciousness, okay? So the question then becomes whether or not you have consciousness. What do you think? Do you have consciousness? I don't know. Have you heard of Willow? The girl Willow at a creator's house? No.

Willow, s s s s s'hwinla. She's going to do some ass things. I'm going to fuck her in that ass and right after May. I think... I think going back to that consciousness thing, after that, the end of her. I think going back to that consciousness thing, after that, the end of that. The answer is no, right? What?

What? What? What's that mean? It's like this bad brain problem. No, no, no, no, no. So you... I was asking if you knew her, I was thinking of her. Because I asked about consciousness.

No. I just started thinking about some good co- Oh, you just randomly. Yeah. Oh, that's good. But conscious... I like malt liquor, right? Yeah.

Like malt liquor, big booty citrus, fucking their cooze in that... ...and cracking all my enemies. And you like those... One of those black... cigarettes called? I don't smoke cigarettes. No, but the ones that the black people like, what are they called? I don't smoke them. Why? The green pack? I don't know what they're called because I don't smoke them. Me neither. Because I'm white though. Yeah, you can smoke. White people smoke cigarettes. But consciousness, if you think about it, starts with a sea.

No, no, no, no. But you don't have it. No, I was just asking if you knew her. No, I don't. You need a meter. So it's a no on both ends. I don't know who this lady and you don't have consciousness. And you like parties? You got parties that you do and shit like that? Do I like throw parties? Yeah. Not typically no. Why do you ask? Well, I know a great woman. I've known her 15 years, right? She does party supplies, you know. And then she underscore creations on Instagram. All fair sizziness. Did she pay you for Amazon presents Jeff versus Taco Truck Salsa, whether it's Verde, Roja, or the orange one. For Jeff, Trying any salsa is like playing Russian roulette with a flame thrower.

Luckily, Jeff saved with Amazon and stocked up on antacids, ginger tea, and milk. Habaniero? More like habanier, yes. Save the everyday with Amazon. That shout-out or that's just a random one? She's a great. She's a great friend. I look out. She like has sacked with you and then you give her a shout-out? No, we've never done anything a day in our life. She's a good friend. I've known years. I'm glad that you think I'm a good guy because I've always been scared of black people.

Why? Black people are nice. Well, more gangsters, you know, but maybe my perception is wrong. Clearly, you've proven me wrong. I'm a great guy. We can feed the homeless together. Would you like to feed the homeless? No, I don't want to feed the homeless with a schizophrenic. Oh. I feel like that's a way to get bad things to go down.

I mean, a lot of them are schizophrenic also, so I'm helping them. Yeah, that doesn't help the situation for me, though. Oh, I don't help them. Okay. We'll figure something else out. How will you stop a spider from crawling into your nose while you sleep and eating your brain? I don't know. I never knew one.

You never knew one. That's a scary question. It's a very scary question. Can that happen? Yeah, they can crawl through your nose when you're sleeping. How would you know? How would you get it out? I don't know.

Would you sneeze it out or would you bang your head against the wall? Well, if it's in your brain, you can't sneeze it out because it's already through your nostril now. So how would you get that motherfucker out? You're a smart man. Tell me. You cannot. You die. If you want to eat your brain, yes.

Oh, shit. Well, guys that are in the county jail in prison, you know, all the spiders and shit we used to see on the walls in there? Make sure at night when you're all sleep, put the toilet paper in your nose. We don't want spiders getting in your nose and you're dying and not making it home. Five years. Love fives after your prison sentence if you come home. That's a good point. Ah, ha, ha.

I everything will see all right, hood. Okay, and following up on that, would you be opposed to a spider crawling into your nose, into your brain, but he does not eat... I want to talk about big booty sicken, fucking... Hold on, hold on. So I don't want to talk about this shit, no. Hold on.

Let's talk about willow and all the sloats. All the susses. But listen in a second. Sets, let's talk. The spider is not... The spider is now in your head. I don't care. He's not trying to eat your brain.

He just wants to live with you. No, I don't want him to live with me. How do I get him out? But he's not affecting you poorly. I don't know. What would the doctor do? How much would they charge? The doctor says your best case scenario financially is just to let the spider live in your head.

Oh, hell no. That might drive you crazy. You might start smoking crap. Maybe he'll eat the schizophrenic part of your brain. I should serve crap. You'll start smoking crack. I look like a crack smoker. Your hair is fucked up.

You need to get it fixed. Can I get it like yours or then maybe? Yes, you can. want you to mac in with somebody, Spider-Loke's daughter. It's a beautiful world. Gripped by Jen on Instagram. She'll get your shit. Corn Road and banged out.

It's like I'm speaking to an alien. Oh, she'll get your hair right. She'll get your hair right. Thank you. Yes. No, you're doing it too hard. You're trying to break my fingers. No, it's just a firm.

Ah! There you go. Do you play as Torbjorn in Overwatch? Excuse me what? Torbjorn. When you're playing Overwatch, do you play as Torbjorn? I don't play those games No, Overwatch

Not Club Penguin I don't play it Why? I never have But if you play it Then you can choose Torbjorn As your character I haven't played it

Why The game is free now It's on Xbox It's on Xbox I have the big booty sit You order it When I go five her house This week

I'm going to her house I have her order it To play overwatch I tell her order it And she'll play this shit Here I'll let you know How it is this game

Okay Do you think she'll like it I got it if I ever should like anything I get forever. Actually, I won it in the competition. That's true. You know, I thought that you were the type of guy who would be bad at math, but you were actually very... Oh, I'm smarter than anything. Don't let the comedy fool you, motherfucker.

Don't slip out here and die. You always got to be careful about sleeping and dying. Yeah, all slips count. Don't slip. Do you know anybody who slipped and died? I don't know, but I know there are some. You just are concerned about it. Well, I know people do.

It's sad. That's sad. I like the demeanor change. It happens. It happens. It happens. It happens. It's part of life. Yeah. It's sad. Everything's going to see all right. See all right. Like creep, right. Crip all right. Everything will see all right. Would they let me join or no? No. They wouldn't let you join. What if I offer them a bunch of games? Like Anthem.

Video game, they're just going to beat you up. They don't want your games. But I'm offering them a gift. Why would they want your gift? Why? They don't want it. I'm trying to make peace with them. They won't put you on because you give them some fucking video games. And why doesn't the police just arrest all of them?

Oh, the police, they never will. Why? I don't know. That's just not their job. And do you support the police? No. Why? I never will.

Why is that? You mean I'm a gaffirger. Next question. But you wouldn't want the police to arrest the rest? or something? Man, I don't, I don't support police arrested no fucking body. I don't like the police. You want an anarchy.

You're an anarchist. I'm a g-gambhanger. Like I said, next question. All right, next question. Would you rather die right now or live forever? Depend me how I die. It's unspecified, if you know what that word means. I don't know.

Or live five ever? That's a good question. Leave five ever, yeah. Hmm. I think somebody that lives five ever might commit. They sing so much shit. Not an option. You have to live forever.

Trillions of years times infinity. This is a good question. I never thought. Trillions of years just... Times infinity. A trillion years is nothing compared to infinite. It's not even a half of a half of a half of a mini percentage. Caruth is fucking die.

I don't want to live the rest of my life millions and millions and billions of years. Might lose my fucking mind. You already schizophrenic, though, so can it get much worse? It's going to get worse within a trillion years. The doctor won't see able to help. The doctors will all be dead by then. You're smart, man.

You're smart. Nobody's ever asked me nothing like that. Thank you. I appreciate it. Should I take you calling me smart as an insult? No, that's great. You're smart. Okay.

That's great. It's intelligence. Here's another good one. You're going to like this one. All right. Let's get cracking. Would you rather have the superpower that makes you lose all your limbs and destroys your life or the superpower that gives you the first superpower?

whether you like it or not. I don't know. I don't know what superpower it is. I just said it. Okay, I'll say it again. The superpower that makes you lose all your limbs and destroys your life or the superpower that gives you the first superpower whether you like it or not. I did gamble.

The fifth superpower, rather they like it or not. That actually was such an unbelievable answer that I'll accept it. You beat my question. I did. Any more games? No more games. people interact with my questions as if they're serious, some people try to joke around with them. You don't even begin to understand the first letter of the first word.

I'm learning your different questions. You're a smart man as I start seeing. You're starting to like philosophy as you interact with my questions. It's a lot of philosophy with me. Yeah. That's good. Does God put people like you here to make life a little more amusing for everyone else? No. So why are you here? I'm here. There's just part of life. But life is so stressful Everybody needs a break sometimes Everything's you'll see all right Don't commit some shit

Are you like a so-uh Preventionist? I don't want people to die Would you either kill somebody Or have them commit to shit? Neither I would never do neither No between the two though of course

Neither Between those two options Take your questions is extra Neither No between Kitt them or murder Themselves or murder Neither

You have to choose one I said no Change the fucking subject. No, it's a hypothetical. I'm not really asking you to do it. Remember. Well, let's just help the people. Let's help them.

Get them some pizza. Let's help them. Did you ever think about seeing a dentist because your teeth are very yellow? Yeah, I am. I have a dentist lined up. I get a rescheduled next week. Don't you think it would make you more respected in your group if you replaced all of your teeth with gold ones?

I mean, Possibly. I got all the respect in my group regardless. But you'll have even more respect. With all gold, possibly. I got a dentist. He's doing it next week. He comes in town. It's a celebrity dentist. He takes care of them. So are the creeps like an organized group where if you need to see a doctor, you'll see a creep doctor?

If you need to see a dentist, he's a dentist who works for the creeps? No, it's just normal people, normal fucking civilians. So you don't get any straight benefits from being in a group? Oh, no. There's non-affiliates that work, normal jobs. take care of they love fives and struggle to get the ECT cards and pay they rent. So most of them don't have a lot of money? Huh? Most of them don't have a lot of money.

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Visit vw.ca to learn more. S-U-V-W, German-engineered for all. The fuck out of you right now. The economy is not good. The crook. What do you suggest? Everybody's crook. It's a solution.

Well, work harder in life. Work harder in life. Treat people well. No, it's a solution for the economy. You get better? Work harder in life. Say, moat dollars and help home. No, not on an individual level.

Like, how would you help fix the economy? Well, I couldn't tell you. Have you considered being, like, running for governor or something? Ooh, that's nice. I never tried. Right. How do you think I'll do? I think you could do good.

Would you ever make Epstein maybe? A what? You know, Epstein? No. Maybe you could make him your running mate? I don't know, Cah. Well, he's a good guy. How you know he's a good guy?

Because he did a lot of good things to the homeless community. Oh, well, yeah, if he did some stuff with the homeless community, I think it's a plan, possibly. So you could make him like the vice governor or something? Most definitely something similar. Something similar. Yeah. Not bad. Who is more talented?

You or Michael Jackson? Me. It's probably not even close, right? Me. Crip Mac. Crazy Mad ass crap. Baby Crazy Maddard. trip.

Me. And what about this? Are you neurodivergent? Excuse the fuck? That means that your brain is untypical. I don't know. My brain is, my brain.

I think how I think. I don't even know how to follow up on whatever you just said. I think how I think. I know. That's why. It's like you have just

straight street truths that I can't really argue against. You're going to talk about Willow and her ass scene she's getting ready to do? No. Is this like a Puckstar? Well, she's not at you.

She's coming up in the world. She's getting her ass-go-fucking again. Amazing, right? That's great. Is it great? I don't think so. I love it. Can't get it enough of it.

We got some great things coming out in the future, me and her. Don't tell nobody. I can't wait. Nobody will know. No. So I will or not a great bitch. She does. Yeah.

Do you play as Torbjorn in Overwatch? I don't know what that is. I don't play Overwatch. He's one of the characters in the game. I haven't played the shit yet. That's Anthem. Oh. No, no worries.

So if you play, will you play Starbjard? Yeah, I mean, got to give me the game. It's free. You can download it. I don't even have to give it to you. I have her download it. She has Xbox. Xbox?

She has Xbox. Did you buy it for her? She already had it. Okay, so you just give her fucking stupid junk. I just fuck her and feed her. and I hang out with it all night. You think if a woman was just going to have sex with people in exchange for gifts, they'd at least make sure they're going to get something worthwhile. Ah, yeah, similar.

What does that say on your forehead? Hoover Killer, I'm proud. I love it. Can't get enough of that. You killed somebody before? I can't tell you stuff like this. No, you can probably say it. If it was long enough ago, they won't catch you. I'm a church man. I'm a Christian.

Right. And I feed the homeless. Just know that. Once your obsession with the homeless, because most of the time they're bad guys, but you want to help them. Most of them are bad guys. They're pieces of shit. They smoke crack. So why do you want to help them so badly?

They do all types of weird shit. You got some homeless people that are down on their luck, and they really need help trying to get their lives in order where you can really help them. You can inspire them and try to do things. What if we collect their teeth? No. Why? Why would you collect them? So they can't eat anymore?

No, they need to eat. They need a great meal. So when they smoke their crack, they're happy. That's what I'm saying. If we collect their teeth and then we put it under our bed, then they won't eat and they will die you. I don't want the homeless to die. I want everybody to die. I want everybody to die.

But your forehead says kill us, so that seems a little contradictory. I got you there. Why did I get that for? Because you didn't make it. Your questions are stupid. You just like them I mean, I need to go I'm a great man

I feed the homeless That's all you need to know I want to collect their teeth And collect their teeth What if we Okay, how about a better option Because their teeth is a little futile What if we collect their brain

So we can scan their brains And check what's wrong with them Do you know to do that? Are you that smart? No, we can give them To a guy who is though Oh, we can make that whole podcast Do it, why don't you do that

Yeah Now what the fuck's wrong with them Yeah In the meantime we'll feed them No, we won't I will. No, you won't. You don't got to, I will.

You won't feed any homeless guy. You don't give a shit about the homeless. I love the homeless. No, you don't. They have nothing in life. That's because they're evil. No, they're not evil. They were sent here to have nothing.

No, they weren't. They need a chance. If they were supposed to have something, they would have it. No, that's not true. You get in a place so they can have things in life. I only believe in free will for people who are not homeless. You got to make sure the homeless Is all right

Homeless are great people They need help You just said that pieces of shit on crap Well a lot of them are But they're great people So you don't even remember What you said a second ago I love them

A lot of them need help though I always help them Nobody's better than nobody That's not true Everybody's better than a homeless No it's not true Yes it is Oh huh

Have you figured out the truth About Santa Claus yet I don't know You don't know it? Santa Claus. What is there? Santa Claus. The old Jolly Satanic.

That's the same guy, I think, right? Mm-hmm. You know, Santa Claus is a... He's a friend of yours. I don't know. He comes down the chimney from the North Pole. And he brings gifts. So I'll take that as a no.

He's checking the list. He's checking it twice. He's going to find out snoo is naughty or nice. Santa Claus is coming. Firetown. It's like the black version It's amazing I love it

Can't get enough of it Santa Claus You can really help the homeless If you put things in order Why don't we help people who aren't homeless Why don't we help people who have issues But didn't get them on purpose? Well, some of the homeless

You've got to realize They oversmoked all their money They have nothing So they're just stuck But you have some of them That regret that And you can really help some of them and they will do good.

I feel like there's better people to help them than the homeless. Well, I'm going to continue to help the homeless. You can help other people. But why do you help the homeless instead of helping people who are trying to gather teeth from the homeless? No, no, I want to help the homeless people that have nothing. But if you make them not homeless anymore, then I will not be able to gather their brain for scanning.

Well, you don't need to gather their brain and scan it. Yeah. Would you let long neck join your creeps group? No. Why? I wouldn't. Why is that? There's no applications right now.

No applications? No applications. Can you make an exception for him? He's this 60-pound white guy. I don't give a fuck. No applications. Why? I said so.

But it doesn't matter how capable the person is? I don't give a shit. No application. Let's say a billionaire wanted to join. I don't give a fuck, no applications. If you're a billionaire and you're a custer, you don't play ball, you don't get cracking? If you're a custard? I don't care how much fucking money you got.

What is a custard? Like what they put on cake? A buster would a cing. You're a custer. I'm a custer, is that a compliment? Yes, a great compliment, you custer, motherfucker. Is it like calling me gay or something? I don't know where you go.

No, just a markout. A markout? Yeah. So, next question. Well, that was the last one, because we have to film with long neck now. Woo! Was that like you trying to represent a demon or something or a horse? It just happens sometimes.

Because of the schizophrenia. Yeah, flip out sometimes. Okay. Well, thanks for coming on. What? Oh, motherfucker! Oh! You also.

Oh! Bye-bye! Let me take these gifts. Thanks for coming, yeah. Make sure to take all your gifts. Alright. It's time. Don't forget the paper.

One more. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You're dropping all your games. Fuck those games!