The Matan Show - Matan & Cesar Millan Debate Eating Dogs, His South Park Episode

Episode Date: March 17, 2025

Hello everybody, welcome back to the podcast. For today's guest, we have Cesar Milan. Welcome in. And now you can come in and sit in the middle. And for today's co-host, we have Clifford the Dog. Please welcome in Clifford. Alright. How does Clifford feel today? He's excited to be here. So please, just in case anybody doesn't know you, introduce yourself and all that. I am Cesar Millan and people know me as the Dog Whisperer. The Dog Whisperer? So what does that mean?

Well, I guess what it means for a lot of people is someone who can connect, communicate, have a good relationship with dogs. You can rehabilitate dogs like Clifford. How can you rehabilitate him or is he too far gone? He looks far gone. He looks very upset, very neurotic. There is some dogs that it's definitely hard to get to them because they're so far gone

and this is what happened to Clifford. How do you think he got that way? I've never seen a dog so bad. That's the worst you've ever seen? The worst I've ever seen. He looks too skinny for me and that's a sign you've ever seen the worst i've ever seen he he leaks he looks too skinny for me and that's a sign of unhelp you need to feed him more he needs to be fed more in the mexican community uh you need to be a little chubby for people to give you a little bit of uh like you know faith to show that you have enough money to buy food well a little bit a little bit why

doesn't my dog start behaving better Even when I get down on his level And give him a piece of my mind Well, I think it's not only A strategy that we need to That we need to pay attention A lot of times it's What energy I will bring into the picture

And how do we address that moment Well, I have my dog I have the one And he's about this big. So I'll get down right next to him and I'll speak his language or my language. And sometimes we'll get in a physical altercation, but usually it'll just result with him not listening to me in the future. Frustration is not a good approach, you know. So when people get down to the level and they're frustrated or confused about their communication, the dog normally are not going to respond the way you want to. Why is it okay to be afraid of spiders but offensive to be scared of two guys kissing?

That's a good question, right? Yeah. I think it's a matter of getting used to it. Getting used to it? Well, you know, if you grew up a matter of uh getting used to it getting used to it well you know if you know if if you grew up in america you're used to it no i grew up in america i'm not used to it some people are not right like if i'm i'm scared of spiders too if i see a spider i'll get a little shocked but if i see two guys kissing i'm i'm in defense mode i'm ready to you ask for your your social distance not no to rumble. You asked for your social distance.

No, no. I'm going to close the gap between social distance with a jab and then a hook. Well, if you can get away with that. Is that how you would do it? No. How would you react if you saw that? I stay in the ranch. In the ranch?

Yeah, by the way, for context, in case the set looks a little different, we're filming here at his ranch. Yes. I just wanted to say that. But're filming here at his ranch. Yes. I just wanted to say that. But here's one related to the last one. By the way, why do they call it homophobia? I'm not actually scared of them. I'm just extremely angry. I don't know.

That's a good question. Normally, I think about how do I solve the world with dogs and humans. I haven't thought about that one. Do you have any pit bulls? I love pit bulls. And, you know, right now it's changes. What if you train them to be attacking, send them in West Hollywood and let hell break loose? Listen, he doesn't mean it.

Me, I don't mean it? Oh, I mean that. Oh, I mean it. Well, it's a lot of pit bulls in West Hollywood. There's a lot of pit bulls. Yeah, but they're good pit bulls. Happy pit bulls. Happy but lucky pit bulls.

We need to send raging pit bulls. Raging pit bulls. Send this guy. Look at him. I would send that guy. He doesn't look like a pit bull. That's not a pit bull, but we could send 10,000 of those guys in the West Hollywood. We'll clean out the area and will replace it with a

mega church. Well, there's already a church there. No, just a big one. The biggest one in the world. Just as a disrespect to the guys who were there before. Well, okay. If you're the dog whisperer, where is Mr. Yelling the Dog's Ear?

I don't know. There's a lot of people that yell. There's a lot of yell whispers. Is there anybody famous with a TV show where instead of taming the dog and make them behave better, they get right up close into the dog's ear until a fight breaks loose? No. So far, no, eh? No, why not?

I don't know because it won't work. The dog doesn't listen with the ears. It listens with its nose. What if... So how can you enrage it quickly? Enrage what, the dog? Yes. That's not what I do for a living. I know a lot of people, they do that.

How can they do it? But that's why they train personal protection. So they create this aggression, right, or this territorial behavior. And they take the dog to this predatory. I actually do the opposite. I remove aggression or dogs and rage. So if somebody broke into the ranch, your dogs wouldn't be able to protect you? No, my dogs do not overprotect.

My dogs protect naturally. They protect, you know, the farm animals. They protect my family. They protect the land. But they don't overprotect. So I'm talking about the dogs who are just going to bite just because people came in. A kid can come in and... So how would they know who to attack?

Based on their color? The energy of the person. The color. No, it's based on the energy. Your intention is something that they feel. The color is something you wear. What if somebody comes in and they got a gun and they're swinging it around and stuff? I mean, I'm from Sinaloa, so I understand guns like nobody else.

Sinaloa? What is that? Yes. It's the capital of all the cartels in the world. Oh, it's in Mexico? Mexico, yes. So guns is normal. We learn, you know, when people are, when they have one or we just become really good at it. You know, reading people, they have this or we we just become really good at it you know are reading people they they have this kind of toys how did Mexican people come up with the

idea to name all of their kids Jesus because we love him yes but I mean I believe they're gonna be close to him by by us by as a you know granting this or giving this or offering, because we believe in offerings, you know. El Dia de los Muertos, that's a big day for us. Is it possible that some of them might be trying to reincarnate their children? They would love to. Certainly my mom would be one of those.

Is that what they're trying to do? I hope so. But that wouldn't be disrespectful to maybe do that, or it's more just like an honoring thing? To imitate somebody that we admire or that we are really thankful for it. You know, most Mexicans, we're very grateful of God. And so if we can become as close as God, that would be an honor. And our parents would totally join us.

Are you religious? Very much. That's nice. Very much. So you don't hang around West Hollywood. My brother is gay, so I love him. Oh, really? Yes. That's not a problem. It's not a problem. It's not a problem at all. Listen, I hurt everything so nothing can... If you don't have a problem with it. Yeah, don't worry. You're better than me. Okay. Is it morally wrong to steal someone's dog so they put up a reward for them and then you return the dog later for the reward?

Well, that's a fraud, right? So that's acting out of dishonesty. Of course. Yeah. No. Just my style. I live by the motor code, so I have never stole. I never owe.

You know, everything I have, I earn. so but but everybody wins in the end because they think that they they were sad for a day or two when they think they lost their dog but they don't care about the 500 bucks that they lost they're relieved to get them back and then you're relieved to get back 500 yeah but you did it in a dishonest way so you're still going to pay for it right so you're going to make tangible money that day because when you're a dishonest person you can make a lot of money no but you're still gonna pay because you just harm your honor and that's but how nobody could know about it it could be a secret god knows you know god knows your mom knows really well your conscious you could tell your mother you found the dog on the street it's a stray dog and you keep i mean she'll get suspicious if you keep bringing home a thousand dollars but at that point

at that point exactly you know your mom knows she she wants to suspicious if you keep bringing home $1,000, but at that point... Exactly. Your mom knows. She wants to believe that you're a good person, right? Because even the moms of all the drug cartel guys, they want to believe they're going to be good at one point, but they knew. They knew.

So the reason why I'm mentioning this is because I grew up in that environment, but mom... You grew up next to cartels? Yeah. And why... So if you watch Narcos 3, I grew up when the Federation of Mexico, when the big, big companies of the Narcos, I grew up in that time, right? I saw Caro Quintero. I saw Feliz Gallardo. I saw Fonseca, El Señor de los Cielos.

Oh, you know, like when people talk about Pablo Escobar, that was one guy. I grew up around 10. And you met them personally? You have to. Did you ever work for them or no? No, no. Why not? That's what I'm trying to take you. Your mom or your parents are going to take you to the right path or they're going to let you be in the wrong path.

It's not easy. But they're in charge of reminding you to be honest, respectful, good heart, and be smart. And, you know, no matter what it is, don't get tempted by the money because it's a lot of money. It's not about the money for me. It's more about the urge to get under on someone. Steal the money. Even a dollar to me to steal it would be better than making 100 honest.

Well, I mean, you can play with that and then eventually pay the consequence of like earning it that fast. Like stealing, you know. If I had to pick, I'd rather work 100 hours for $1 to steal or work 100 hours to make $1,000. It's all about just stealing and taking away from others. Wow. Well, you're investing in the wrong bank, but, right? It's not working. I'm not making any money. As a matter of fact, I usually end up on the other side of it. But it's just about the idea that one day I could get someone. I understand that, right?

Because you can like, you know, I just want to feed the dragon versus feeding the other part of you. But even my guy here, I don't feed him at all. He's starving. Look at him. His bones look like they're about to fall off. He's going to be so tired by the time we finish this segment. Why? Because he's so much energy going into this?

He also doesn't have any food in him. Yeah. You know, that's hardcore. How can you stop behavior like this, though? Barking and woof and woof well first i remove you know the whole neurotic behavior normally what i do i put him in the pool now i put him in the pool the pool yeah when a dog is having like a hard time to drown him not to necessarily to drown the neurotic behavior

that's what i'm removing now uh so i put him in the pool and then the dog because he didn't Not to necessarily, to drown the neurotic behavior. That's what I'm removing, no? So I put him in the pool, and then the dog, because he didn't choose to go in the pool, I put him in. So the dog is going to go into this motion of, like, how do I get here? And so now I'm redirecting the way he's draining energy. And then when the dog relaxes, I take him out. Then the dog is like, oh, this was awesome. Then he gets hungry, then I feed him.

Then he's not going to have this energy because he's going to be exhausted. I thought your tactic was to go... Sometimes I use that... Can you try that on him? South Park, remember you saw that episode? I saw the South Park episode, yes. That would definitely work on it. See, this is not the time that I would do South Park. No, that's not...

If he watches eye contact, I would never touch a dog with this eye contact. I would walk the dog, go for a bike ride, but I would never touch it because it's going to strike. If a dog is looking at you like that, what's a better option, a left hook or a front kick? Well, I don't think at that time you're going to be safe touching Richie. Well, that's why you have to get the first shot in. Well you gotta catch him before he gets there. Yeah that's what I mean.

You're gonna do some kind of block, you gotta catch him before, you gotta catch him before he gets that far. Right now he's far, so right now the best thing to do is leave him alone. There's good distance between you and him. Yeah. So just let him explode in his own brain.

As long as he doesn't hurt himself or hurt other people, you can say, you know, I lost that round, but in the next one, I'm going to catch him. Wouldn't you want him to hurt himself to be less dangerous towards you in the future? No, because it becomes a habit. So the whole point is not to allow that. But then eventually he'll just be out and done.

Well, he'll kill himself. But then there's nothing to worry about. Well, I mean, I guess you could do it that way. But then what's the point of helping that person? Oh, no helping. Then I get what I want. I look in his pockets and there's no repercussions. I didn't know that was the strategy.

But again. We were talking about, we were having two different conversations here. Absolutely. I'm more into like father figure kind of thing. You were talking about how to help somebody like that. And I was positioning myself to kill him and then steal his wallet. So my mission is better human, better planet, right? So I'm always going to go for the way, okay, let's keep that human happy. Let's get the human, uh, healthy, good heart and smart and, or use them, you know, help him as much as he can, you know, learn to develop his

intelligence. But most people, I think they can do a good happiness, good health and good heart. I think that's achievable. Yes. Hey guys, sorry for the interruption. I have to let you know that today's episode is sponsored by Price Peaks. Price Peaks is the best place to get real money sports action. They have over 10 million players and something about a billion dollars.

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No, it was hot outside, so I put him in the freezer. Guess what? I had a friend growing up, and he put a peri-key in the freezer. Yes. Well, my dog, I don't know. He was 11 years old, and then, you know, oh, he was hot, but he was okay in the head, right?

Yeah, but that's a small bird. My dog, he's been in there for years, so he has a block of ice around him. So I don't know if he's still living, but he's a small bird. My dog, he's been in there for years, so he has a block of ice around him. So I don't know if he's still living, but he could just be frozen. Frozen in time. Yes. If that we can do, frozen in time, I would definitely frost a lot of dogs. So you haven't worked with dogs like that before?

Just big blocks of ice? I have worked with dogs that have died before. No, no, just dogs in ice. No, not yet. dogs in ice. No. Not yet. Should I... So how should I try one, freeze them? Should I put them outside

or should I use like a torch? I don't know. I think that's your... your imagination. He's still there. He's been in my freezer for years. It's a smaller dog. Like the...

Like that one right there. Yes. That's Alfie. It's actually a little smaller than him. Oh. Maybe about... Like that one right there. Yes, that's Alfie. It's actually a little smaller than him. Maybe about that big. The block of ice is about this big. Because it went around it. It's the whole top shelf of the freezer.

Yeah. What did your mom say? Do you live with your parents? No, I live by myself since a couple of years ago. So that's when I brought him. You can do stuff like that. Yeah, because I went to go do some business and when I came home the dog was going so I said oh yes I took him by the tail and I I said it's time to cool down I

mean he's very I'm not evil I just I'm just close I'm down to business I don't have yeah time see like if a dog looks at me like that what would you do I'm just down to business. I don't have time. See, if a dog looks at me like that. What would you do? I'm getting the gun. I'm getting the gun. I know it's a little extreme. A little bit. But, you know, like I said, I hurt them all.

I hurt them all. And I just stay in the middle. Yes. Do you think every woman should have the right to a post birth abortion? What does that mean? Do you know what abortion is? Yes, I do. So if they're getting sick of the child, maybe two or three years old, they can have somebody come over and pick his legs and his brain apart until he's not alive anymore.

Unfortunately, there are some people like that. Should they be allowed to? Should the government fund it? Definitely not. Nobody should fund it. Why not? I'm against that, by the way, but some people might disagree.

Because I'm always going to go back to the spirit. It's not your job to remove humans from this earth. It's like you won the lottery, that kid won the lottery, and maybe not the parents, but, you know. I'm not talking about when the child is in the womb. I'm talking about. Outside, yeah. Yeah, he's.

Maybe even. It happens to dogs. Yeah. It happens to dogs. So a lot of dogs, you know, they're food for people, right? So that dog didn't want to right so that dog oh you're against eating dogs well you know i understand in circumstances like when people are very very very very poor they will eat rats and the way you know things like that but uh in that circumstance

but when it's when it's when there's no need for that and we have developed a different relationship with that particular species. Are you a vegan? No. No, you're not. That's nice. No, no. I'm Mexican. Yeah. Most Mexicans are not vegan.

We have no food, so we eat whatever we can. Oh, yeah. Well, I'm not saying from back then, because now you have some money you could substantiate. But I agree. I don't really like vegans. Do you usually eat human food or other types? I tried to do vegan. I became really weak like this guy oh yeah yeah so he doesn't need anything i was like him like i was like not feeling good because i wasn't eating protein you know what i mean i'm more i grew up with very little protein right because we were not rich and so we were like meat once a week or something once a week so what did you what

did you eat the other days dogs no beans and rice okay and cheese why not the dogs there's a lot of stray dogs in mexico don't need dogs no but there's a lot of homeless dogs well we don't call it homeless it's just stray dogs yeah right so i listen so if you ask me why would you rather have a dog inside or a dog outside well a dog outside at least has the capability to fulfill his spiritual instinctual mental uh you know journey versus a dog that is indoor most of the time they develop problems like my friend over here because he didn't that's not your friend freedom well it's a nice way to say it that's a definitely i don't want this guy it's a being that should have never existed it was a mistake it comes from a different planet do you think one

day all of your dogs will gather together and stop you to death like the romans did to caesar no you know the hu this is the difference with the human and the dog like the dogs do believe in loyalty and and i i know you can say hey but some dogs have attacked their humans and killed their You know, this is the difference with the human and the dog. Like, the dogs do believe in loyalty. And I know you can say, hey, but some dogs have attacked the humans and killed their own humans. The hand defeats them. But we don't know, you know, the details in it. I'm 55 years old. My kids grew up.

One is 30. The other one is 37. And my kids, you know, when I started, I had 65 dogs. 65 dogs? 65 dogs, two kids, really bad marriage. So I was like a single father. And so I'm raising 65 kids, 65 dogs

with two kids, and those dogs come from aggressive background. My kids are totally... Were you getting paid to raise these dogs or was it a hobby? Rehab. So I first started walking dogs. The Mexican guy that walks a bag of dogs, he lives in Inglewood and walks all the way to South Central. That's how people got to know me. It's a Mexican guy who walks a pack of dogs.

Kind of racist, right? But that's what we are here. Well, there's a good amount of... You're Armenian, you're Persian, or you're... Oh, no, no, no, no. Whatever, right? So whatever race you are, that's what they're going to call you. Yeah.

And then what you're doing. So Mexican guy that walks a pack of dogs. Whatever race you are, that's what they're going to call you. Yeah. And then what you're doing. So Mexican guy that walks a pack of dogs. And so my kids grew up with a pack of dogs that were previously aggressive, and they're totally fine. So when people say, you know, what do you think about the dogs? They kill their own humans, or they hand the feeds to them. Well, we don't know the details. No, but that would be just, you know, a problem.

That would be more because the dogs Are not trained well Or something But the Romans They thought out What they were doing I mean Yeah those are humans Those are humans

Yeah I'm saying the loyalty But what if the dogs Here wanted to take over This compound This compound Yeah so they'd stab you Well that would not be dogs

I tell you that That would be humans Dressing like a dog But that. That would be humans dressing like a dog. But my dog... It would be like this type of dog. It would be this kind of dog. Yes. This kind of neurotic dog, out of control. Why is it okay for the police to shoot somebody committing a crime,

but not okay when I shoot somebody so I can take their money? Well, that's a crime. Yeah, but why does the police get to, that's a crime. Yeah, but why? Why? Why does the police get to decide what's a crime and what's not? What if I determine that that person having money that it's not mine? It's a crime. But so that person money is yours.

No, no. I'm saying if somebody is robbing a bank, the police can shoot them. Yes. But why? If I'm walking, I don't want to use Inglewood, because then I'm basically allowed to do it. But if I'm walking in Beverly Hills and somebody has a nice watch, why can't I decide it's a crime that that's not my watch and I'm going to take them out?

I think it's a difference, no? I mean, the guys who are robbing the bank are doing a bad behavior, therefore they're going to engage in that kind of outcome versus the person who earned the watch and then you want to come and take them, then you're allowed to kill the person? Maybe not kill them, shoot them in the knees. All right. Hurt them just to get something.

Well, I'm not trying to hurt them. It's more just to obtain. It's more business. The police are business, too. I guess people do it now, right? They do this kind of lazy behavior. In England, it's, you know. I'm going to go grab a gun, and I'm going to intimidate people so I can take whatever they earn.

I guess you can do it, right, because people have done it. I mean, but again, what are you working on? You're working your honor, your respect, your self-love, your self-value, or you're just going like everybody else. You're just somebody that follows the quick money. Why is it that pit bulls make up 13% of the population yet commit 50% of the crimes? They're powerful.

Yes. They're powerful. Sounds like some other group I know. They're powerful, and they're not being properly raised you know they're they're they end up in the wrong hands you know should we try to breed them down so in like a thousand years how the wolves went to that small type of dog we can go from pit bulls to i guess just another variation of that type of dog? Well, just so you have another knowledge. So if you go to a shelter in Los Angeles,

you're going to find that, I would say, 40% of the population in there are going to be pit bulls, and the other 40% are going to be chihuahuas. And the rest of the percentage, 20%, are going to be mix. Yes. Right? And then you're going to ask, hey, so why is the chihuahua and the pit bull and the same level the percentage, 20%, are going to be mixed. Yes. Right? And then you're going to ask, hey, so why is the Chihuahua and the Pit Bull

on the same level of percentage? Aggression. So to your question... Yeah, but the Chihuahua can make an issue, and also I think with Trump in office, are we not going to deport them too? I don't think America will ever deport a dog. I think America will deport humans before they deport dogs.

Listen, you can bring a dog as an American citizen as soon as he steps on the land. That might be true, but the problem is who owns the Chihuahuas? That's the real question. And when they get deported. But definitely they're from Chihuahua, Mexico. That's what I mean, yeah. Is that a real city there? Yeah. They named the city after them they're from Chihuahua, Mexico. That's what I mean, yeah. Is that a real city there? Yes.

They named the city after them? Yeah, Chihuahua. No, Chihuahua was there before they named it Chihuahua. And then it's a queso Chihuahua, cheese Chihuahua. They're super good. Good for quesadillas. So if you ever had a good quesadilla, it's because you had a Chihuahua cheese. I don't understand what you're saying.

You're saying it's bread and dog meat and cheese? Chihuahua cheese? I don't understand. No, Chihuahua is? I don't get it. No, Chihuahua is the state. You know? It's a state. It's like Texas.

It's a state. Okay. Yeah. But so, you know, obviously things there from there, they name it the Chihuahua cheese or the Chihuahua dog. Right? Yeah. It belongs to the Chihuahuenses.

Yes. How do I explode my microwave? Go for it. I don't understand. That's the question. Because I'm trying to explode it so my... Microwave. No, no. You know that thing you put the food into reheat?

Yeah. I'm trying to explode it so my eyes don't pop out. Explode it? Yes. Like to explode it so my eyes don't pop out Explode it? Yes Like to make it explode? I'm asking how I can do that I think you can put aluminum now Aluminum will work?

I have to tell you not to put some metal inside Well if I don't My eyes are going to pop out I don't get it But I'll think about okay just sit on that just like the 13% in the 50% question I think you understood that one now you picked up on it no no guesses no not the microwave one. The other one. Which one? The Chihuahua? The pit bull. The pit bulls. Like Inglewood.

Yeah. Hey, listen. You got it now. No? No. Okay, we'll move on. Do you pee on random trees to assert dominance when you're walking? You do that?

Hell yeah. How do people react to that? I don't do it when they're watching. Well, then you're not assertingerting dominance You need to do it to show It's a scent It's not a sight So it has nothing to do with people looking at me It has to do with the scent, right?

The smell of it It's 43 acres, trust me I pay in every tree In every rock Every place Yeah, but how will they know it's your piss? How do my dogs know? Well, no, how would...

I'm saying to assert dominance over humans. Well, I do it here in my ranch. I don't... Oh, but that's already yours. You're asserting dominance over dogs. You still got to pee on it. No, I'm saying like in public. Like if you're walking around...

Let's say you go to New York for a trip. Yeah. If you saw, well, not a lot of trees over there. Every guy in the world has done some emergency stops. No, no, not emergency.

This is to show that you own the place. No, but you can own the place differently, right? Because 20 years on TV, you own that, you know, there's many ways to own.

Yeah, but the show, do you still do that show? Yes. You still do the Dog Whisperer? No, no, the Dog Whisperer, no, but other shows. I'm working on getting it back.

The ratings could have gone up if instead of helping dogs, you just peed on a tree for 20 minutes. Like Jerry Springer. Is that what you did? No. That was his style? I'm a different kind of entertainer. I educate and I create enlightenment in people. But I love all the shows, you know?

That's one thing I love about America, it's just like a big dog park. Everybody has their own ideas, everybody has their own race, and it's just a fun place to live. Should somebody love their dog even if it's gay? Yeah, if that is real, yeah. Why not? Well, I mean, it would be tough to determine if it is gay i guess

if you you would have to have multiple dogs and you could pick up on the behavior then but yeah because the dog don't see a gender thingy right so the dog sees trust respect so if he a handicapped person or a man or a woman or or a, you know what I mean? The dog gives his love not because it's a gay thing. Well, I know that some of your tactics for the dogs is to not look at them and to go, shh. But what if the dog is gay, should you give him a shock collar? You only use tools if you don't know how to reach the dog or the dog is too far gone. And then that's when you use a long line or prong collar, shock collars, whatever. No, no. Shock collar too.

E-collars, right? Shock collars, whatever the people call it. That's because the dog is already doing bad behavior at a distance have you ever worked with a dog that was gay and you gave him a shock collar you shocked him and he became straight

he didn't know he was gay I guess but after you shocked him did he become normal yes every single dog female or a male that's good

I seen this guy I laugh on your show yes That's good. I seen this guy. I laugh on your show. Yes. It's a really serious business. It's a very serious business. This is my therapy right now. Yes.

Why would I do this? Because I want to laugh. Hey, guys. Sorry for the interruption. I have to let you know that today's episode is sponsored by Sheath. Sheath is an underwear company that I've worked with in the past. I also wanted to personally let you know that if you ever see somebody in the streets wearing Sheath, give them a nice hello. Sheath underwear also includes a dual pouch.

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That's sheath.com, S-H-E-A-T-H.com. And use code MATAN, M-A-T-A-N, to get 20% off your order. Thanks to sheath for sponsoring today's episode. Should I need a veterinary license to open up a clinic and get paid to dispose of a dog? Yes, sir. Please do. Why? So you can do it with gentleness and whatever you got to do.

Well, they're going to get in the nicest way like... Gone. I get it. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, if you do it with honor and respect. What's the most respectful way? I mean, probably the least painless would be like a sniper. But I feel like that's going to be a bit hard. You know what I like to do before any of my dogs departure?

I like to take them to their favorite place, you know, to experience one last day on earth. And then, you know, I have a good friend, and we do a nice, beautiful ritual. We pray for them, and then that's it. Yes. Yeah, I think that's a good idea. But I mean, are you the one who puts down your dogs, or you take them to a vet?

I take them to a very good friend, a very good friend that knows when it's time to let them go, it's time to let him go. That's because they're in a lot of pain, so there's nothing I can do anymore at that time. But we have kept, you know. You wait until it really has to be done. Dogs are 22 years, you know. So dogs, they have gone through cancer or things like that, and we already, you know, did what we got to do.

And we can't beat it, and we see that the dog is just getting weaker and weaker. And then unfortunately is what it needs to be done. Yes. Did you enjoy the South Park episode made about you? I love that episode. My kids love that episode. You know, I already had a show that time and my kids were little. Once my kids saw me on South Park, they were so happy about it.

Really? Yeah. They were saying, my dad is famous. Just because I was in a cartoon. But they didn't know beforehand. What? They didn't know you had a TV show or they just didn't know it was famous. No, they were part of it.

Oh, really? You know, in the Mexican community, the whole family works, right? So we bring everybody in. And so my kids have been working since they were little, you know, because I didn't need to show people, look, your dog is done because, you know, now he trusts my kids. So, you know, my kids are doing it. But they were part of it.

And then when they saw me in South Park, they were, my, for them, that was a big deal, especially because we didn't let them watch him because they said a lot of bad words. Did you know what type of show it was? You voiced your character, right? No. Oh, you didn't voice. They called me and said,

hey, we're doing that show about you. I saw what they did to Oprah. I saw what they did to Tom Cruise. So it was like, oh, shit. Right? So then the guys called me and said, we're doing it. Is there anything I can tell you not to do it?

No. Oh, you didn't want them to do it at first? Come on, Oprah is an icon. Oprah is an icon. You know, Tom Cruise is an icon. I'm just a dog guy. Yeah. Right?

So they're going to... No, but they did a great job. Did you dislike it at first and then you started liking it or you liked it immediately? My episode, I loved it. Immediately. I love my episode. It's the best episode on earth.

Every time that I do a live show, I always put that in and everybody gets a laugh. And the people who had never watched it, they go back and watch that episode. And then, you know, they send me a text on Instagram or TikTok, and hey, we love that episode. It's a therapy for me. Everybody likes to do the ch- Yeah, even I'm trying to do it with him. I mean, it's clearly, it's actually enraging him. He's doing so good, guys.

So good. He's getting worse and worse. We're going to euthanize him after this, but the way he likes to do it, sniper. With a bolt-action sniper, yes. And everybody will agree, which is the worst part of it. If that was a dog, nobody would want him to do that. Somebody started a, I forget the name,

but they started that thing where people can sign a form to try to get something passed, and they wanted the mayor or the president to put this guy down. They saw him on a previous episode. I was thinking about to have him dressed and painted like a dog but the concern was that people might think he's doing blackface so I had to stay away

from that. You can't do it. Yeah. I mean, I was thinking about I think Clifford the dog is red face in a black eye

or something but I just I already talked so much about it about Englewood style stuff that if i do that it's not gonna look like i'm making them i kill you man have you ever experienced a dog who talks to you like that uh they wanted to kill me yes no no not wanting to kill you like a dog like you're talking to him you do you try it doesn't work so he pulls out a gun and holds it sideways yeah no thanks god i no thank you god i don't want that

if you're watching this episode i don't want that why do the japanese people call the monsters in their movies gay jews they do yeah they call them kaiju which is i mean it's not a direct one but it's extremely similar you know japanese have a good sense of humor i don't know i need to ask them but they're not doing it on purpose i mean it's not spelled with a g but it's actually kaiju but if you ask him you go kaiju kaiju hey anybody with an accent we're going to come across the wrong way sometimes. I don't mind. I'm a former Jew, so I give them permission. I love it.

I love it. It opens to interpretation. Yes, this is a question from a fan. A viewer wanted me to ask why his new dog has been throwing up despite being fed large cubes of salt. Salt is bad for dogs. That's what they threw up when they go to the beach and they swim through the waves and chasing the ball.

By the time they finish... I thought you said that when a dog isn't listening, you'll put them in a pool. You won't put them in the ocean? That's different than the ocean. The ocean is something that they do on their own versus the pool. The ocean is something that they do, you know, on their own. Versus the pool is something that I will lift them and put them in the pool.

So it creates a different reaction. So salt for dogs is bad. Too much salt. Well, how do we know? He totally rehabilitated the dog. Sometimes it's not me who does the man the dog is helping the other dog how do you know though that he's not gonna in the long it seems short term it's working but maybe long term that dog will end up like him it can yes imitation yeah yeah the Menendez brothers right the Menendez brothers that's an imitation right so so with the environment you

know the the uh the philosophy the action so you can see it you know yes uh monkey see monkey do monkey monkey see monkey do yes yeah i just had to make sure alfie right now he did a good job and of course he can definitely now how going back to that last question, how do you know when the cube of salt is too big? If it was like this big, would it be too big? Yeah, you'd kill him. Well, that's why he's been throwing up, I guess, for the viewer. You'd kill him. Yeah, definitely you'd kill that.

How can you? So, one is enough. Because you know what? The cows love it, right? Cows like salt? That's the only way they can get some kind of minerals so you got to put a big big chunk of a salt and then the everybody comes and just lick it and lick it that's how they get it but not for dogs dogs are completely because

they need uh they get it through through a different source another viewer a viewer had another the same viewer had another question. He wanted me to I would definitely tell that viewer not to get a dog anymore. Get a cow. Well, he had a different dog. He had another question. He says, why does my dog keep throwing up despite

the fact that I've been feeding him oil? What is the dog? Oil. What kind of oil? Gasoline instead of water. That's a dragon. Well, he's not speeding fire. He's just vomiting all over the place. The viewer said that he took him to the vet,

and the vet called the police on him. I would definitely join in. Join in on feeding dogs oil or calling the police? Calling the police. Right, Alfie? We can. We can. We can.

The dog is starting to take part in how he's acting. He's getting louder and more aggressive. More aggressive. That's right. Hey, guys. That's a human being. Unstable. Look at Alfie.

Go play with him. There you go. Kill him with kindness, Alfie. Kill him with kindness. Or just kill him. You can, you know, definitely. Yes. It will help.

More oxygen for humanity. His eyes are perfect, eh? He's definitely like a combination of a lizard and a dog. Oh, I had another question. Why do the cartels, you said you grew up around them. Yes, sir. Why do they sell drugs which can lead into a lot more trouble instead of entering the business of selling dogs?

They don't see a value. They don't see the, I mean, selling dogs. You're not going to make those billions of dollars those people make. Maybe not as much, but it's a lot less risky. You know what I mean? It's super less risky, but I guess there's a different frame of mind. They want the fame. They want the power.

They want the money. And they want the control of the whole entire country. So you go after what gives you more money, unfortunately. A lot of the time, though, inevitably, they end up getting caught or killed by a different one. I guess the same thing could happen if there was a big rivalry in breeding dogs, but I feel like it's unlikely.

There is a rivalry, you're right. In the breeding world, there is a lot of rivalry. Do you think breeding dogs is unethical? Some people do. Some people... Listen, there's some people that are do you think breeding dogs is unethical some people do some people listen there's some people they're doing it for 30 40 years or it's a family tradition it's very very very few people with good ethics that they're going to breed good genes right and so that that is that is the beauty of a good breeder yeah right they're breeding generations and generations and generations and they never breed anything that is

Unhealthy But then the rest of the people they just go for the quick job Like the backyard breeders Would you breed dogs or no? Millions of dogs in America they die every year So it's an overpopulation problem So something that I learned Along the way

Because before I came to America I didn't know there could be an overpopulation An overpopulation of dogs? Yeah. You're saying in shelters or on the street? So in America, we euthanize at least a million dogs a year. Why don't they just let them loose? Because that's not the system.

It's like Singapore has a different system, right? America has a different system for dogs. So they don't believe in the dogs. Well, in Singapore, the problem with Singapore is I i couldn't live there they find you if you spit in the street that's right i love that part you like that i love a structure i love no no i love organization i love structure once you hit a certain age i like more well i like structure too but i like more the structure he did if you think somebody's disrespecting you you spit in their face.

You should go to Sinaloa. You will love it. I don't think I will last there. You will love it. I'm all talk. Oh, well, then they teach you how to do it right. Yeah. I mean, once I get introduced to a real situation, it's not going to happen. I'll try to cross the border illegally.

And you crossed the border illegally. I jumped the border. I was 21 years old. How old are you? I'm 17. No. Yes. 17?

Wow. Well, four more years. Until you're in jail. I jumped the border the other way. You climbed a fence or was that before the great white hope, Donald Trump? There was a fence. There are holes.

There are fans through the beach. It took me two weeks to cross it. But you have citizenship now? Yeah. Are you allowed to vote? Yes. I'm an American citizen. And you voted for Donald?

I vote. You vote for Donald? I vote for direction protection. For Donald? I can't tell you who I vote because I have to stay in the middle. No. I stay in the middle. But you did vote. I help Democrats and I help Republicans.

No, no. You should only help Republicans. I like the strategy, right? But I also like certain things about the Democrats. Democrats is about the PAC. And then Republicans is about the PAC leader, right? So a combination of those two, I think it creates a good nation, right? So we need good leaders.

Half of it is a good nation and the other half are pieces of shit. That's what I think. You agree with me, but you agree that the liberals are the bad ones. Whoever doesn't do things with honor and respect and love and smart and then they should know they're doing it wrong. Just by doing it from there.

Not if it's a color thingy. Oh no, I don't agree with that. I'm a big color guy. Because I believe that whoever comes to America have to abide by, that's not what the country can do for you, what can you do for the country? And you should come with a dream. And you should come to make sure you bring an asset to it, right? Because it's not your land.

Well, my opinion, I agree with that. I think if somebody comes to the country legally, that should be allowed. But only if they vote Republican. If they don't, I think the citizen should be revoked. It's like the Olympics. You know, it's like literally, you know, the journey of the immigrants is like the Olympics. We all should have a chance and only the best ones can win. I agree.

Well, I know you have to get going soon. And also, I have to get back to my studio. Unfortunately, in West Hollywood. To West Hollywood. It feels like immigration room. This is how they interrogated you? It's a little bit like an interrogation type of room very basic tables yeah no mics and just chairs yeah because i right now i know right now it's

like 11 a.m and i told long neck who's gonna come on my podcast later tonight to get there at 9 a.m just to prank him so we gave him the go we gave him the code to the gate to get in but then we changed it on the phone. So right now, he's just there and he can't get out. So we have this guy, Long Neck, who's basically a dog. Oh, you know Long Neck? I mean, he actually probably has an IQ lower than that dog right there. I mean, he's just unbelievable.

I have friends in my chats. They have the IQ lower. Yes, absolutely. Yes, he's gonna He'll be great But we need them in the pack Well, I don't know if I I mean, long neck

We might as well euthanize him Take these two together Definitely He's not part of my pack at long neck Well, thanks for coming on I appreciate it Thanks for coming to the ranch And guys, stay tuned for next week

With long neck We're gonna euthanize him Thanks for watching That's it Thank you, God It was fun