The Matan Show - Matan Interrogates a Young Amish Male About His Culture

Episode Date: December 28, 2025

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Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the podcast. For today's guest, we have Amish. Welcome in. For today's co-host, we have my manager, Vara Floring. Welcome in Vara Flooring. How's it going? Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, too. Yeah, so please introduce yourself for anybody who might not know you and all that one. Okay, yeah, I'm Amish dude, also known as Timothy. I'm basic that Amish kit. That's been on Roomspringer, taking it to another level.

And for anybody who might not know, what exactly maybe is in Amish and a Roomspringler? What a Rumspringer is? What is that? Yeah, is that a friend of yours? Oh, no. Oh, dude, don't open down Borellas. No, like, Rome Springer is basically like a thing from like, like, 16 to half to like roughly around 20 where you kind of get to do what you want. Um, what is that?

Dude, is he still, is he still blinking? I think he got in a big accident with his skateboard. So hopefully he makes it out. But so, so once you're between 16 and like 20s. one year's old, you change your name to a room splinkler and then you get to use electricity? Ah, no, no, you don't change your name or anything. You just kind of go wild, you know. So the name of this time period is room splinker. Yeah, it's called room splinger, yeah. Okay. And, you know, in case anybody doesn't know what exactly is in Amish? I'm sure a lot of people do,

but maybe there's some who don't. Oh, it's like some. Maybe some Amish people, I guess. Yeah, like, do you think Amish people don't know what Amish people are? Um, yeah, it's possible, maybe like a different variation of Amish people, just like black people who can't afford Wi-Fi. Yeah, I've never met it. Like, I've, I've never met any black person like... Really? Like, without Wi-Fi and stuff. Well, how would you know? Is that something you usually ask them? No, I never asked them that question. So it's possible you did meet a black person without Wi-Fi, you just didn't know?

Yeah, I mean, I met a black guy like down in, well, I didn't really meet him. Like, down in Jamaica? Jamaica? Yeah. You went to Jamaica? No, I didn't. I just know a black guy down there. You know of a black guy in Jamaica? I mean, that's like, obviously, but I don't understand. He's a pretty cool dude down there.

Right. So what do the Amish people eat? Worms and bugs or human food? Oh, we eat like human food. Like, everything's made from scratch, like meat, chicken. Really? So I thought maybe you guys were trying to be with nature. So you guys are able to cook and use fires?

Oh, yeah. We use kerosene stuff, too. Caracetan? Like kerosene stuff Oh dude That looks like me when I rolled the buggy Yeah Going back to what you said a second ago

Are there a lot of black people in the Amish community? Oh no The only black people in the Amish community Are like adopted ones Say again, I didn't hear you Oh like the only black The black kids that are like in the Amish Or like Mennonite

Wow so got a lot of them No the only ones that are like probably adopted Wow We don't have any in our community, but I know there's some... I might need to live there. Yeah. But you're not black, though. That's why.

It sounds like a beautiful location. Okay. Is that a rule? Is that one of the Amish rules? Like that you can't be black or something? Yeah, is they kind of avoiding that? Ah. No, I don't know.

Is he on the spectrum or is he trying to get on the spectrum? No, he's just having an issue with the umbrella. That's my manager of Virofrooring. He's worth half a billion dollars times a billion. Dude, that's pretty crazy. Um... Is he secretly on the spectrum? You say spectrum?

Do you mean like autistic people? Yeah. I don't think so. I mean, he's never really been able to communicate to me. So that might be a sign of yes, but I don't know for sure. But how is he like worth like half a trillion? No, half a billion times a billion. How is he worth like half a billion times a billion?

Because he owns like half of the buildings in Los Angeles. Oh, dude, no way. So. Is he tooish? I don't think he's Jewish. Okay. Why do you say that? Because he has a lot of money.

No, you just said he owns a lot of buildings. Yeah. Well, I see what you're saying. Yeah. Maybe I'll become Amish. It sounds wonderful. Maybe you get to live with good people and not have to, you know, get fucking attacked in the street a night. Oh, do you get attacked by homeless people?

I wouldn't say homeless. Well, homeless, but there's another way to describe them, but I'm not going to say it. Oh, well, you can describe them. to me. I'm like a visual learner. You know what I mean. You get what I'm saying.

I think you're trying to act dumber than you are. You know what I mean. You've been on rum splinter for a long time. It's only been like a little over a year. So you've dealt with them.

You've experienced the wrath. I've never been like attacked by anyone. I don't know. I always stay safe. I've been attacked by the cow one time. I was chasing it, trying to chase it into the pasture, threw a stick

at it. You kicked a stick. stick right back into my uh my thigh do you think that if you pushed your eye back far enough you could see your brain i've never thought of that actually yeah dude i mean well i i thought of it yeah yeah have you tried it no i think it could hurt but it might be actually something the scientists need to try out yeah maybe they get some criminals and they see what it is oh that'd be a pretty interesting idea because like like uh because like we don't even know how our our brain looks like He's not committing suicide, is he?

I don't know what you're talking about. There's nobody there. Oh. Do you think Half-Life 3 will ever be released? What's that? It's like an Amish video game. Half-Life 3? Yeah.

I've never heard of it. That's pretty surprising. I thought you might have had some inside info on that. No. No, like, Amish, we don't do any, like, video games and stuff. but I thought that you're allowed to for these four years period only at like the neighbor's house and stuff so you still live with your parents

yeah and while you're living with them you're not allowed to use electricity still no so so they would be they're gonna be mad that you did this I mean if they see it that is so you didn't tell them you're just in Los Angeles without them knowing yeah I just kind of left so where do they think that you are maybe they think you're like dead or something I mean they have no means of communication right yeah I mean I don't know I I just tell them I'm leaving, and then I tell them when I'm back. They never bother them.

They don't bother me. Nobody else in your family, maybe sneaks a little electricity and shows them something like this? Maybe the driver. The driver? Yeah. So every morning, so if we want to go to work, like build a house and stuff, we have like a driver. Oh, so you let somebody drive you? Yeah.

This is like the cheats that the Jewish people use with the Shabby's Goy's. It's very similar. I've never heard that one before. It's the same thing actually It's entirely with electricity It's like you're having a non- Amish Use electricity to help Yeah

Yeah that's exactly what the Jewish people do Are the Amish Jewish? No no they're not Jewish Are there a lot of Jewish people who live there No I've only seen like two Jewish people in my life Wow I really need to live there This is like It sounds like a wonderful village Yeah but you have to work really hard

Like build houses sheds I'll do anything to live in a place like this I'll give up everything I need to live in this place Where is it located? Do you know? Dude, it's everywhere, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Indiana Iowa, Missouri, Minnesota But probably Missouri is one of the best to live in, right?

Because it's a little... Yeah, it's a little warmer. Yeah, it's a little warmer down there. Warmer? And you live in, uh, where? Like Minnesota. It gets cold something. Like through the winter.

Oh, God, he's dying. Can you give him CPR? Did you give him some disease? No, I didn't give him CPR. No, a disease? Oh, no, no. I don't spread these seasons. Are the Amish still allowed to stone women if they talk back to their superior? Oh, stone women?

I've never seen anyone stoned. Really? Yeah. I thought the whole appeal of the Amish thing is that you kind of get to live like from a thousand years ago, no? A little bit of that and a little bit of like the new stuff too. Like we don't stone anyone though because like the Amish don't, like we're like pacifists. Oh, so you guys don't like war or anything like that? But maybe it's like passivism is good, but you have to have a little bit of control over when somebody acts crazy.

Oh, I mean, if someone acts crazy, they usually leave the Amish. Well, what if they're crazy and they don't want to leave the Amish? I don't know. I mean... That's what I'm saying. So at some point you have to remove them, maybe by physical force. There has to be a line drawn. I agree with passivism, but to some level, what if a guy...

Yeah, they'll get, like, shun and stuff. Well, what if a guy is punching you? You're going to have to defend yourself, right? Oh, yeah, you punch back. Or that's what I, that's what I do sometimes. Like, I've never gotten, like, punch up. Me and my brother, when we usually fight, we fight back and forth. Yeah, so that's what I'm saying.

I'm saying that, like, it's like all in fun and stuff. Well, have you never had to defend yourself in a real fight? Oh, no, I know. Well, that's what I'm saying. I'm saying that if a woman talks back, it's similar to when your brother punches you. You have to discipline them back. You have to punch your brother back so he knows that you're not a fool who he could beat up. Yeah, but like you don't hit women and stuff.

Wow. Do you hit women? Well, I thought if I moved to the Amish place, I could stone them. I mean, that was kind of the whole reason that I was considering it besides the black and Jewish part. Isn't that like domestic abuse? Well, it is in these crazy world that we're living in, but I think it should be allowed. What if your wife says, hey, how's the day been? What do you respond? Ah, you used to probably say good.

It's like, like, where would you get the stones with like, you? your pockets wouldn't be back. You have them ready. You have stones in your pockets. Your pockets aren't that deep. Plus, look, I have a deep pocket here.

Imagine I filled this with stones. Like how big stone? But like the wife makes the... Well, you don't want to kill your wife, of course. That would be abuse. You want to just give them like a hematoma and then you want to damage their brain

so they become insufficient and unable to speak and then they just listen and cook. Oh, man. No, you wanted them to talk a little bit. Why is that? Because they need to know... They need to teach the kids, you know...

You're having the women teach the kids? Yeah. Oh, so this whole community is fucked up. I thought it was a perfect place. Oh, they got to know how to cook and work too. Cook is good. Work?

Yeah. Building places? You having them build places? Yep. You try to have these buildings collapse? No, no, no. So as soon as I was 13, like, I was building stuff on it. Well, you're not a woman, I thought.

No, I'm not. But, like, when, like, the girls, like, they start cooking when they're, like, around 10 maybe even earlier. Okay, well, that's what I'm saying. I'm saying that they're cooking in your building. Yep. You're not cooking, though, right? No, I know how to make scramble legs and boil water.

Yeah, and the women are usually not building. No, no, no. Well, that's what I'm saying. That's what I think that's how it should be. And if they try building something, you throw the stones at them that you're supposed to build with. Oh, we just built with two by fours and two by sixes. That would be a good one.

Like, just fucking hit them with a two by four. Oh, no, no, no, no. You could relieve yourself of a headache for like three, four hours then they're gonna wake up they usually don't talk like that wow yeah they're usually like

they usually cook usually after something like that they're like where am I oh they already know where they're at they're usually in the kitchen dude do you give him some rainbow that's funny to you I don't know what he's doing

he's having a crisis right now can i have your sunglasses he's not giving me a sunglasses why would he give you sunglasses those cost a billion dollars i want to wear a billion dollar sunglasses well if you break it you can't pay him back that's the problem uh i won't break it though what is the most expensive hat you on on roblox uh what's roblocks

it's like a uh a store A store I've never been the Roblox Yeah it's called the Roblox hat store Because you have a pretty big hat on right now Yeah Yeah So like where's the store

Can you like send it to me or Well there's a lot of that I mean have you heard of Walmart Yeah I've been there I've heard it gives you like autism Walmart gives you autism Yeah Where did you hear that

Ah through a great vine Yeah maybe I mean I don't know if this is why people Are not using electricity But I don't think any of that is true Oh, no, I've seen, like, a lot of people, like, work at Walmart, and it's a very, like, high sign. Like, I did, like, all... Very smart people.

Very educated. Like, if you call, like, educated people on the spectrum. You know, a lot of the, a lot of the time, the people on the spectrum like that, actually are the successful ones. Yeah, I think I'm, like, a little bit on the spectrum. Because I got, like, sent a test on, like, autism and stuff. And instead, I, like a, like a, like a, just a hint of the tism. I don't know if that's how that works, but. Maybe.

Because, like, didn't you say, like, you can get benefits to you, you get, like, the touch ofotism? I don't, I don't think that's how that works. I think you'll just be treated poorly. Oh, man. You want to want to go around saying, hey, guys, I have autism because then people are going to think that you're a joke. Yeah, that's why, that's why I've, like, that's why it's just, like, people have said that I have autism. They think that maybe I do, but I'm persistent about the fact that I don't. Do I look like I do, or do I look normal?

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Have you ever heard of fend? It's this new awesome supplement that will make you happier. You should take some back to your village. I've heard of that stuff. It makes, ah, what does it do? It makes you, like, stand and sleep at the same time. Isn't that pretty cool, though? It is pretty cool.

I mean, you usually wouldn't be able to stand and sleep at the same time. Yeah, like, if I were to stand and sleep at the same time, I'd take f***. Well, the only way you're going to be able to do that is by taking it. So what I could do is I could have some ship to your village if you give me our address. Okay. And then you could put it in the food? Yeah. Wait, did he take some of that stuff?

Is that something you'd be interested in? doing giving fed to people in their food without telling them. I don't know, that sounds like murder, dude. No, that actually would be a good punishment if the woman talks back. Oh, given something like the half sleeping, half standing stuff? Yes. Man, I think we keep that stuff like out in, like out here, like out in California. Right.

It looks scary out here. Well, I... Oh, I, dude, tonight at the gas station, I saw a guy like walking across the street. I don't know if he was barking or screaming. screaming but I think he was doing both yeah I don't know that sounds strange I've never seen that before only last night oh yeah I was I think the guy was homeless I mean he looked like no he probably actually is rich that's what the rich people in LA do it's a weird culture oh did he look dirty is that what he does well I don't

know I don't even well let's move past him did the guy look dirty that you saw he did look dirty so that's almost for sure that he's a rich guy he said that's the new style it's like trying to make it look like Like you don't have money. But he was like barking and stuff. He was like Chewalking. Yeah. Like next thing you know.

Because he wants to get fined so he can show how much money he has. What? Can he have a burger down to him? I don't know if that's why I don't. Do you have a wife? There's no, but no, I don't have a wife. You don't have a wife? Well, do you have a wife?

I'm working on couple. Oh, is that something that's allowed? You can have multiple wives? Not really. It's kind of. It can happen sometimes you're saying? I don't know. any Amish that has like multiple wives.

Maybe I should be like the first to do it. Can your wife like make a burger for him? Well, in reference to that, where you're from, is it okay to marry a four-year-old or that's still considered wrong at least 30% of the time if I'm being generous? Like a four-year-old? Oh, no, like they're still a child. So you're not allowed to marry a four-year-old?

No, no. So what's crazy? I mean, I thought the Amish weren't crazy. I thought they were normal. I thought they had gone back to real reality. Yeah. How many four-year-old girlfriends do you have? I don't have any four-year-old girlfriends?

Too old. So you go for the younger ones, like the one or two-year-olds? No, that would be disgusting. They're a baby. So you go for the three-year-olds? Well, that's a little bit different because now it's a toddler range. It changes from like two to three. So what is the appropriate age of marriage in the Amish community then?

Like anywhere from 18 and above. What if it's like an 18-year-old? and a three-year-old, is that okay or no? No, like, usually, if it's a three-year-old, it's your, like, your sibling. What about a three-year-old and a four-year-old? Is that allowed? No.

Why not? I mean, they're the same age, basically. Yeah, right. That's why you wouldn't do it. Well, what if they want to get married? Maybe they, I don't know. I don't know. I mean, usually, usually...

Because I'm an advocate for child marriage. Oh, you are? You're Muslim? No, I'm not Muslim, but I think that it can be extremely helpful and it can be beneficial for their entire life. Oh, wow. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I never thought about that. Because when I was four years old, I never thought about marrying. I just thought about... Well, you don't give them an option. You just marry them. And then you get like a horse.

Oh, wow. That, isn't that like a range marriage? Yeah, I thought that's what you guys did. Oh, no, no, we don't do a range marriages. So who was your favorite YouTuber growing up? How to shovel quicker and avoid punishment? What? Was that who was your favorite YouTuber? I thought that would be a good guess, but maybe not. Oh, no, I didn't watch YouTube.

Really? No, I just watched the horse and the cows. The horse and the cows? No, like the horses and the cows. Yeah. Isn't that more work for you guys, though? You kind of have to work with them? You do, yeah.

And do you guys acquire that? Well, you already said, no. I was going to ask if you acquire that by selling off little people to marriage. So how do you get a horse? How do you guys do that if you don't have any electricity? Because don't you create a horse with wires? No, no. You take them to the neighbors and let's just say like magic happens.

door you can go to like a thing where they call it i thought you put a bunch of wires together and then put them under water and then a horse will pop out three days later no i don't i don't know that sounds like putting a blender in like in like a bathtub or something so that would kill you do it like if you ever need another one of him you just put a like him and then a blender in the water and like two days later why would you blend a human i mean that's going to destroy them especially if it's in the water you'll electrocute oh yeah that's right i was talking about breeding horses yeah like you tame which just take him down to the neighbors. Why does the neighbor do?

The neighbor is having sex with the horse? No, no, no, no. No, no, the neighbor has a horse. That's not, that's not, like, not that. The neighbor is married to a horse. No, like the neighbor has, like, a horse that is, like, not castrated. Why would he be constrated? Did he do something wrong?

You, like, r-red another horse? No, like, it's not castrated. That way you can breathe and stuff. I don't know what you're saying. Yeah, I mean either. This is a good one. I guess maybe you're getting a little more in tune with like the culture of the world because you're on Roomship Lingar. Yeah.

Who would win in a fight? Five million Mike Tyson's or 1,000 Iron Man's? Ah, dude, I don't know. Like, how tall is Iron Man? Well, there's a correct answer to this and I'm going to show you a video here. I just want to know who you think. Who's your guess? Uh, probably the number with more.

Like, I don't... Five million Mike Tyson's, over 1,000 Iron Man's? I think so, yeah. Okay, we'll take a look. This is a real video, by the way. Okay, that's pretty cool. They filmed this on Mars. Oh, no way.

I didn't know we were on Mars already. Just Iron Man, because he can fly. Look. Oh, wow. So the Iron Man have the bullets, but there's a lot of Mike Tyson. Do you see what's happening here? What's happening? The Mike Tyson's are getting destroyed.

Because the Iron Man's are shooting them with lasers. This just looks like Indians and cowboys. I don't know. I feel like you have a different use of Indian than what I thought you meant originally. No, no, like... It's like India versus Pakistan. No, no, no, no, like Native American. No, I don't even want to talk about those guys.

It'll make me upset. Oh, okay. Makes me sick to think about. Man, what... Are they, like, discriminating? So, like, who's winning? Well, let's skip a little bit. Okay.

The Mike Tyson's won. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. And they destroyed them too. They wiped out 100% of the Iron Man's and they still had about 40% left. That's pretty good. I mean, the bigger the number, the more the power.

Yeah, so I wanted to do a thing because I know that you're, I mean, you've been out of kind of Amish stuff. Like, you're still Amish, but you're still trying new stuff. So I wanted to bring in some stuff to see if you could try it for the first time. and let me know what you think about it oh that would be fun mr florin can you go grab that stuff well you know what let me grab it for you okay why does this thing smell have you smelled this thing you you've not smell it i it's not good do you ever like bite into it Don't look. Don't look. I'm trying to make you to surprise.

Where should I put my eyes at? Look at Mr. Flooring. Where's Mr. Flooring? I don't know where he is. His trick worked. He's hiding. Don't look over here. Don't look over here. Can I look now?

Yeah, so this is what you'll try first. Have you ever had something like that? Yeah, this looks like bread. That's bread, yeah. Oh, you guys have bread? Oh yeah, my mom makes pretty good bread. pretty good brand okay so forget it then I got you thought you guys didn't have that yet oh what about that this we tried that before can I try it now yeah is it

good that's called an apple do you know what that is yeah oh you've had it yeah okay I thought I was getting you some new stuff to try yeah like those we can find what about this have you ever tried this before what's this that's this dog soup. Doc soup. Yeah. What is it? Well, open it up and let me know what you think.

Can I look into it? Well, it's for you to eat. I mean, maybe you can take this back to your village and show them how good food is really made. Are you sure it's dog food? That's dog soup, not dog food. Oh, man. Is it not good? Why are you looking at me like that?

Do you make this? No, the store, the store sells it. Oh, you need to get a wife, Matan, and eat it, and so she can... So do you want to try this and let me know what you think? Oh, dude, no. Why not? Because it wasn't made by your wife. But if you were a true Amish, maybe you're lying.

Maybe you're not really Amish. You're just pretending? No. I think so. Otherwise, you would try that. What is this? It's a piece of dog. Why would you butcher dog?

Why would you butcher a cow? Are you Asian? I'm not Asian. And I know that, well, I'm taking kind of inspiration from them, and so is Roblox. Oh, Asians are pretty cool. Yeah, well, anyway, do you want to try it? What they do is they remove the bones from the dog, that's the dog's legs. Must have been a smaller dog.

It must, yeah, why does it only have, like, three leg bones? I don't know. Can you try it first? No, it's for you, of course. I wouldn't want to take it from you. No, it's yours. I wouldn't want to take it from you. I'm offering it to you.

I had my own earlier. Oh, you did? Yeah, of course. Oh, man. So take a bite and let me know what you think. Do you like it so far? Do you like the smell? Not really, no. But have you ever tried that?

I've ever tried it. Let me know what you think. Dig into that. That's good. I don't eat dog. Do you eat dog? Yeah, of course. Oh dude, you should eat it. I had my own earlier.

It seems like you're trying to get away from eating it because you're not a real Amish. No, we don't eat, dog. Yes, you do. No, we don't. Well, you start eating it. How about that? It'll be healthy. I'm already pretty healthy. Well, I'll leave it there in case you want it later.

How about that? Dude, I might have... If I get hungry, I might eat it. Maybe that's actually a good thing. If you could take that back to your village and if somebody pisses you off, you could throw that at them and their skin will start to disintegrate. What? You didn't understand what I said?

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What would be the Amish alternative to a school shooting? A guy walks into school with a bow and arrow and shoots one guy. Wait, wait, what? That sounds like a Native American. You keep talking about those people. Are you sure you don't want this? Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Are you sure? Are you sure?

Are you sure? Do you want a bite? If I want a bite? It looks like you want to bite. I don't know. Do you want to want to try it? Is it good? Wait, can I have it?

Can I try it? No, you're going to try giving it to me. I don't want it. I already had my own. I already had mine too before. Why are you so against trying a new thing? I don't know, man. That just doesn't look good.

Yes, it does. It looks wonderful. Here. Do you want some? Give it, give it to him. Do you want to try this? No, give it to him. I think you should take a bite.

How about, I'll even hold it for you while you take a bite. Look, it's losing all the flavor. It's dripping. Do you see that? Yeah. Why is he hiding? Because he smells horrible, this thing. Do you want a bite?

No, I'm good. Okay, well, take it home with you. All right. Man, I didn't know the sunshine showing like really bright in this room. No, it's because of the smell right now, because this smells so horrible. It smells like complete shit. Yeah. It's making my eyes water a little bit.

It's making your eyes water? Yeah. Why, it just smells so amazing? No. So why would your eyes water? Because you're crying of happiness. Tears of joy. Oh, no, like tears of like bad smelling. I've never heard of tears of bad smelling.

Yeah. should try some would your village be able to survive an Ebola outbreak what's an Ebola it's sort of like um I don't even know how to explain it it's like a disease that's coming from like a Nigeria or somewhere over there some black guy probably tried eating a monkey I don't know what happened that's probably how it started we don't we don't have that issue in in like Amish communities too well yeah obviously not um but assuming one of these guys came over there and started spreading the virus would you guys be well prepared well equipped oh yeah we'd be like ready for I don't know we'd have our

shotguns or 12 gauges but like he like but that's not it's a virus it's not a guy it's not like a guy you can shoot down it's it's a lot like what are you gonna shoot at you shoot at the virus the virus is is inside of you you're gonna shoot your head off no I mean suicide's not very nice no no you wouldn't like at Fandual Casino you get even more ways to play dive into new and exciting games and all of your favorite

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531 2,600 to speak to an advisor free of charge I don't know Oh, well, when, like, the crawler virus came out like, like, never, you shot at it? No, it, like, never came for us. It, like, it was like, like, anti-alish. Well, I'm not asking if you guys would get hit with Ebola. I feel like you guys would be the last people.

Yeah. But I think that's why you guys wouldn't be prepared for it. You would never expect it. I, we're, like, prepare for everything. We got, we got can't meat and stuff and apples sauce. Yeah, so maybe, I really think you should try this because this is such a, you know what they call this in the restaurant? That looks like me. You throw out.

They call it wonderful dog. Wonderful dog. That's what's the name of the recipe. Dude, no way. I don't understand why you're so against trying it. If you eat the whole thing, I'll... Okay. Matan, if you...

You have a wife? No, I already told you. Oh, man. If you had a wife and she would have made that, I would probably eat it. No, this was made by my friend's wife. Oh, you have a friend? Yeah, his name is Johnny Mike. Johnny Mike?

You see Johnny Mike? I think you want to take a bite, right? Oh, yeah. No, you want to give it to me. You want to give it to me? I think you should have a bite. You know, you know, it's very insulting in my culture to not eat dog meat when somebody offers it to you. This cost me about $480.

Oh, dude, you give the $400. I'll take the $480. No, I already spent it. Now you have to eat this thing so I can get my money back in ideas. Oh, I just got an idea. What's that? You eat that and then get more ideas. Father would probably start throwing up and be sick for half of a month

Oh Yeah, I'm not eating it then No, because you have a better immune system than me Yeah Are the Amish people aware of the evil flying demons that are coming to kill them And feed their corpses to the wall of flesh What? You guys aren't aware, you guys should start getting prepared

Oh dude, I didn't even know Yeah The driver never told us What drive Who's this driver Is this guy not Amish You said right No no he like

Like he In the morning Picks up all of And he keeps up And he keeps up And he keeps up A bunch of Amish people On a truck like pit bulls

He goes like He picks them all up And then takes them But how many are there Are there like 40 of them There's like six of them Oh six people Yeah

That's not that much There's six people In your community This is like just one family No there's like There's like one construction crew But there's like I don't know

Are you part of the construction crew Yeah There's like a couple, there's like a couple hundred in our community. So these guys getting, he's rounding up hundreds of people a day. He's, like, rounding up, like, but it depends on like, like, like. Is he paid for this? Oh, yeah, he's paid. How much did you guys pay him?

Uh, enough where, uh, he can, like, feed himself. That doesn't seem like that much for rounding up hundreds of people a day. Should at least give him some sort of badge. I mean, he gets like a high-five every morning. That's almost insulting. That's like a good thing. Do you live near the man at the end of the rainbow with a pot of gold? Oh, I've seen the end of the rainbow, but I've never seen like the little man at the end of the rainbow.

Yeah, I thought maybe you lived. All of my misconceptions here are coming to an end. I thought the Amish people were basically living like in a movie and you could fucking beat the shit out of your wife and kill dogs. But it's like it's just people who don't have electricity. and are unaware of, like, half of the things going on in the world. Yeah, basically. Okay, so why don't they revert to, like, living with little midgets who wear green and give you gold and then start throwing stones at their wife when they ask them how their day was?

Man, I don't know. Have you been there? To the Amish place? No, like, to that place where they do that? In my dreams, I'm dreaming of it. Oh, man. I'm dreaming of making the world a better place. So, like, you're a better place, like, throwing stones at women?

Well, I know... Oh, you know what my... Not for no reason. Oh, you know what my favorite Bible verses? What is that? It's Timothy 212. Because it's your name? No.

Not only that is something else. But that obviously helps it, right? It helps a lot, yeah. So what is the Bible verse say? It's basically, uh... I'd have to look it up. You don't even know what it is? It's just your favorite verse?

Yeah, it basically means, uh, like... Like, but it's... I do not, what is it? Like, I do not permit a woman to, uh... assume authority or teach over a man she must be quiet yeah that's wonderful I mean that's what I'm looking for you're religious right

a little bit yeah so can we revert back to that and then if you it'll be good because it's almost like a game one day you'll get them and they go bang and then they're dead dude I don't know man that sounds like abuse or something it's not abuse it's murder yeah do just so

it's way past abuse yeah do you have do you like have insurance money Like Theovani told me about insurance money About insurance money Yeah What did he tell you Like basically if

If you happen to stone your wife Like she died and stuff He was talking about stoning the wife too No no Okay good You're just talking about like Like if someone dies And there's insurance money

Like apparently you can get insurance money from them Yeah I think that's something the rabbis do Who's the rabbits Yeah well let's stick with that The rabbits So, essentially, just to round up what you were saying from earlier, because we have to end soon because I'm having another Amish guy in my show, actually. He's his long neck.

You know, long neck? No, no. He looks Amish. It's like a malnourished Amish. Oh, man. Feed him some of that stuff. Well, I was going to say, we're going to hold him down, and we're going to shove that into his mouth and then s-h-oh-oh-oh-oh.

And they're going to throw his head out, and we're going to use it like a soccer ball. Bang, bang, ping, ping. That doesn't sound nice at all. And then we're going to parade these streets. Man. That's how it's disgusting. No, it's wonderful because it's just what he deserves for being such a lovely human. Oh, man.

He's part of the Amish community in Nepal. Where's Nepal? Anyways. Yeah, so at the end of all of it, do you think you will return to the church or become a professional pixel gun 3D? player. Playing with guns? Pixel Gun 3D, the mobile game. I don't know what that is. It's one of the original mobile games. You don't know what it is? I've heard of hill climb racing. Hill climbers?

No, hill climb racing? Hill climb racing? That sounds like a real activity, not a video game. Oh, what? It's like a game. So will you return to the church or will you become a professional? Professional gamer? I don't know yet. I've never really paid, like, I've never really played, like games. This guy's making a mockery out of my fucking life. It's making me a joke.

This is a business show where I interview the Amish people about about food they haven't tried. You're making me look like a fool. I thought he's your manager. I have to get a long neck.

Okay. That's the end of the the episode. Thanks for coming on. Will you hell me the long neck and then and then streats while we and then we feast on these organs.

No, no, no.