The Matt Walsh Show - Am I The A**hole? Matt Walsh Decides Part 3
Episode Date: February 2, 2022Thanks to Established Titles for sponsoring today's video. Go to https://establishedtitles.com/mattwalsh to get 10% off. Matt Walsh answers Reddit users who want to know if they are the a**hole Lear...n more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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So we return now to offer some light and hope and guidance to the poor souls on Reddit over at the
M.I. the asshole forum. These are people who suspect, you know, that they might be assholes.
But the world needs to be assholes. They're curious if they're assholes. But they're not sure.
So they go to Reddit and they ask these questions. They pose these quandries. And I will read some of them
and we'll try to lend a little bit of clarity. So we'll start here. Am I the asshole for Venmo requesting
money from a Tinder date after he crapped in my car?
All right. Now we're getting into the nitty gritty here. A couple weeks ago, I, 19 year old female, went on a Tinder date with a guy who I knew from high school. We were mutual acquaintances before this, and when we matched on Tinder, we agreed to meet up. Pick him up at 7 and we went and got some food. After that, we drove to some secluded place so we could talk with extra privacy, leave it up to the imagination. Anyway, around 10.30, he starts to complain about his stomach hurting. I asked him if he wants to leave and he says no, and kind of blows it off for a little bit. Around 11, he says he really
needs to use the bathroom. I wasn't sure what to do because we were in a very secluded area
and I wasn't familiar with. He tells me that there's a gas station about 15 minutes away from us
and asks me to step on it. I leave and drive as fast as I can, but it's very dark. I don't know
my way around it. He's becoming more frantic, visibly sweating, breathing heavy. At one point,
I ask if I should pull over because going in the woods is better than nothing, but he swears
he could make it. Unfortunately, he misses telling me to take a turn somewhere and we get lost.
I have to turn around, and it's probably like 10 more minutes, according to him.
Then he gets very pale and yells at me to pull over, and I stop as fast as I can.
But what I do, he doesn't get out of the car.
He just sits very resigned.
At that point, I understood it was too late.
I came to understand it was too late.
I wonder how you understood that.
We both sat there in silence for a little bit.
I really wasn't sure what to say to make him feel better.
Oh, man, this is a nightmare.
And I was also feeling a little sick from the whole thing.
Parentheses, the smell.
Thank you for clarifying that, because I was sure.
I wouldn't have known. Eventually, I just offered to take him home and tried to act nonchalant.
Try to act nonchalant while this guy is sitting in his own shit, you know? Just be cool about it.
He agreed, so I drove us home. He also tells me that he will reimburse me for getting my car clean.
I felt bad because, of course, it wasn't his fault. Accidents happened, so I offered to split the cost 50-50, and we never talk about it again.
I also told him if he wants, I'd like to try a second date. Wow. You are either very very very,
very forgiving or have very low standards or both. Since this one turned out not so well,
he thanked me and we parted ways. I got my car detailed and sent him a text, letting him know
everything went well, but I didn't get a response. I waited for another week and tried texting
him again like, hey, did you see my text? And again, he didn't respond. I went on Tinder to try
and message him there, but I saw he had unmatched me. It was pretty clear that he had ghosted me.
I was pretty pissed, not going to lie, because I thought I was chill about the whole situation.
It's cool if he didn't want to see me again, but it could have still kept up his end of the
deal. I went looking for his Instagram to try and message him there. And when I find I see he had his
Venmo in his bio, I decided to Venmo request. In the description, I put the poop emoji, the pointed
finger and my card. Communicating now in hieroglyphics, you know, because regular communication
hasn't worked. Surprisingly, I get a quick response. He sends the money, but he also texts me
pissed because he said his friends would be able to see what I put and would probably put two
and two together. I told him I wouldn't have done that if he hadn't goes to me. Am I the
Okay, well, that was a story. You know, first of all, this is what you get for having the girl drive.
It's one of the many reasons why you as the man should be taking control of the situation.
If you are the one who's driving, then you would have more control of the situation. This probably wouldn't happen.
But beyond that, I'm not really sure. I'm kind of torn on this. Who's the asshole in the story?
I mean, there's definitely one asshole in the story, a very, a very active one.
You're a sick asshole.
But beyond that particular asshole, I mean, I can't blame you for not wanting to have to foot the bill to clean the shit stains in your car.
But at the same time, I can't really blame the other guy for hiding away in shame.
It's hard for me to blame him for that part of it.
What else are you going to do?
I mean, you texted him and said everything, you texted him and said after you got the car cleaned,
to text him and said, everything went well.
Went well with cleaning his shit from your upholstery.
How do you even respond to that as the guy?
You insensitive asshole.
What's he supposed to say?
Thumbs up emoji, smiley face.
Cool.
Congrats on cleaning up my shit.
So there's no good answer here.
But this is also, here's another thing.
This is why, you know, I'm so glad that I'm married.
So that I can in my car without judgment.
Also, because if you're married and you're in that situation, and we've all been in situations like that, when you're in the car, there's a little bit of a bathroom emergency.
But if you're married, now you can have an honest conversation in a situation like that.
You could just say, when you're dating, right, and you just met this person or you're going on your first date, you don't want to be honest about it.
And so that's when the crisis starts.
But when you're married, you'll just say, listen, I'm going to shit my pants if you don't find me a bathroom within five minutes.
All right.
So who's the asshole?
I guess it's got to be him.
He is the guy who's in your car after all.
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All right, finally, well, two more here, I think.
Let's see, my daughter came out as transgender a few years ago,
and for her birthday this year, we legally changed her first name to a feminine name of her choosing.
My wife and I have always supported her and her transition,
but my daughter seemed disappointed that her surname wasn't also changed.
I am Icelandic American, if you don't know,
surnames are quite different than in other countries.
One surname is their father's first name and a suffix related to their gender.
the son of Jokul would be Joklson and the daughter of Jokul would be Jokal Doter.
When my American wife and I married, she took my last name per American custom and gave that same masculine surname to our daughter when she was born.
All of us have the same masculine last name.
My daughter wishes to change her surname to Jokul Doter in order to align with her gender expression as well as Icelandic naming customs.
I hadn't considered this for her as we live in the United States and use the local customs.
my wife and I are on the fence about changing her legal name again as processes like this are very
expensive and time-consuming. I told her that her mother and I would be more than happy to help
with the paperwork if she paid for the processing. Our daughter doesn't accept our reasoning
and claims that we're only contributing to her existing dysphoria by not going through the
process again. So am I the asshole for making my transgender daughter pay for her own surname change?
But no, absolutely not. You are not the asshole for that. You are the asshole for everything else in
this story.
What a asshole.
Starting with the fact that you were supportive of your son pretending to be a girl.
So your son, and did you say how old your son is?
Oh, 17.
Okay.
Your son has two problems here.
And this is your son we're dealing with.
Your son is a self-intitled narcissist.
Demanding.
You have to pay for everything or my dysphoria is going to be worse.
This is emotional blackmail.
And this is in gender ideology, it's very common.
This is one of, you know, the propagandists that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, you're in gender ideology, this is one of, you know, the, the, you're going to, that, you're going to have dysphoria and you'll be in emotional pain if they don't do literally everything you want.
So this is self-intitled narcissism, and it's also, you know, a certain element of, of, you know, just sincere confusion as well.
and you as the parent, as the adult, you're supposed to be a voice of reason.
You're supposed to be a clarifying presence.
And by supporting your son in his delusions, his narcissism, his confusion, you are dooming him to a life of despair.
And that's what makes you an asshole.
All right, finally, am I the asshole for calling the police on my fiancé?
My fiance, 28 male and I, 30 female, have been together for three years.
I used to live close to work and use public transportation.
but after I moved in to his house, which is hours away from work,
I bought myself a car since I'm a nurse,
and also since there isn't any hospitals close to where we live
that I could transfer to.
You know, one thing about these things is that all of these people are assholes
for giving way too much information.
We don't need any of this background.
Still going this asshole.
Let's just get to the story, please.
My fiance's car hasn't been able to work for close to two months now.
It requires so much money to get it fixed,
and he refused my financial help when I offered it.
Instead, he would ask to use my car.
every now and then, and I agreed as long as it's when I'm not working, and also since he only
uses it for trips to the supermarket, etc. On New Year's Eve, he told me he wanted to use my car
to go hang out with his friends and celebrate, but I declined because I had to cover a night shift
and needed my car to travel to work. He insisted and even suggested that I take the night off
or swap shifts with another nurse, but I couldn't do that at the last minute. Oh my gosh.
Okay, blah, blah, blah. Fast forwarding. She doesn't want to give the car up, and he decides to take it
anyway without asking her, and he drives off to go to his New Year's party. She tries to call him
and can't get a hold of him, and then finally does talk to him 30 minutes later, and she's pissed,
so she calls the cops to report him from stealing the car. Okay, and now he's mad. Are you the
asshole for that? And he also says that he can take the car and she shouldn't have called the police
because they're engaged. And so he says, what's yours is mine? What's mine is yours?
who's the
well he's obviously the asshole
you asshole
he did steal a car
you told him not to
you asked him to bring it back
he didn't bring it back
you called the police
that's probably farther
than I would have taken it
but I think it's justified
but here's the main point
no it's not true
that as an engaged couple
what's yours is mine
what's mine is yours that's not true
that's marriage
so you don't get to take advantage
of that before the marriage even happens
that there isn't like
this grace period ahead of time. That's in marriage. Once you, that's, again, the point of marriage.
Now you share everything. And then if you take, now it's the family car. And if your spouse calls the
police on you for taking the family car, even if they don't agree with what you're doing with it,
then that's a different story. So get married is the, is the moral of the story. And then you can
steal your spouse's car all you want. And even shit in it.
if you want.
