The Matt Walsh Show - Try to Laugh Samantha Bee vs Lily Singh

Episode Date: December 18, 2021

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You know, as we enter the new year, I thought it'd be fun to take a trip down memory lane and review some of the feminists that we've watched, some of the feminist comedians we've watched over the last year. Not really fun. I mean, fun's not the right word. It's actually deeply traumatic for me, but maybe fun for you to watch me in my pain, you sadists. So we're going to start with the feminist comedians, you know, scare quotes around comedians, Samantha B and Lily Singh. Now, both of these women were, it might seem equally unfunny, but I think now's the time to see who wins the actual title of the worst feminist comedian period of all time period. So first up, let's check out Samantha B. So my producer suggested that I watch and review some feminist comedy bits,

and he suggested this because evidently he hates my guts, which is understandable. I would hate me too if I wasn't me. I am me and I hate me. So, you know. But the thing is, I did actually watch some feminist comedy in anticipation of doing this little YouTube video. And, but much of it was so bad. I'm a feminist.

And usually, like, I'm, like, not an advocate of, like, street harassment and stuff like that. Except from men that wear gray track suits. Just so, so, so bad. I remember when Kate Middleton announced her pregnancy. I was like, I wonder if she'll keep it. Who knows? I thought maybe the fruit was hanging a little too low. It's a little too easy.

And there's all kinds of euphemism packed into that last sentence that you can get into later. But then I thought, if I'm going to review feminist comedy, I shouldn't go for the obscure ones. I should focus on a feminist comedian who is successful, well-known, allegedly talented. And that's why I am going to focus on Samantha B. You know, Samantha B has her own comedy show on Lifetime or whatever it's on, and she's hailed by the media as brilliant and hilarious and genius and so on. That's what the media says about her. I figure she's the best of the best when it comes to woke female comedians. So let me give her a shot.

We're going to watch some Samantha B together. And more than reviewing it, I think I want to see if I can find a reason to laugh. I want to laugh at a Samantha B. joke. I want to see if I can do that today. I'll try my hardest. So let's watch this together. Let's start with this. We'll take a look. Okay. Meatpacking workers often contend with cramped conditions, grueling labor and long hours. So it's unsurprising that plants have become hot spots for COVID-19. If we want to keep our food supply safe, we should first keep our workers safe. So naturally, the president isn't. Following aggressive lobbying from the meat industry, Trump issued an

executive order aimed at reopening meat processing plants. Look, it's not shocking. The president leapt into action to save meat because burgers, you endanger, girl. Okay, so I think there were some jokes in there. I can't be sure. And this might be part of Samantha B's genius, that she tells jokes and nobody knows that they're jokes. So she's deconstructing comedy. That's what I'm told. That's the thing about female comedians. Samantha B., Hannah Gads, be they're always deconstructing comedy rather than just telling funny jokes and i don't mean to imply that women aren't funny i would never imply that i in fact am stating it explicitly just kidding not really but sort of okay let's keep going from ohio to new york michigan to california

this morning the beef shortage at wendies is spreading the company with that unforgettable catchphrase decades ago is now having trouble finding the beef. You're out of beef then? Out of patties? It's embarrassing that the where's the beef place is out of beef. It'd be like if someone at Taco Bell was caught thinking inside the bun. Okay. Let's stop right there.

This is a professional comedian, folks. She makes millions of dollars telling jokes. And yet she's never actually told one so far as I can tell. And so I'm starting to figure out that, that when people say Samantha B is funny, which I've never actually heard anyone say that, but theoretically, if they do say that,

they don't mean it on the scale of comedians, right? They're using a different scale. What they mean is that she's funny for a feminist, which is like saying like a corn dog is healthy for carnival food. It's just,

it's so maybe if we understand it on that scale, we get into the mind of a feminist, maybe it becomes funny. So let's, let's keep going. With some food shortages and increased prices, the federal supplemental nutrition assistance program is more necessary than ever. About 38 million people rely on SNAP benefits to feed their families, and last month the USDA announced it would increase overall benefits 40% to give families

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limited time sale, so go to EstablishTitles.com slash Matt Walsh to save 10% off today. Remember to use the discount code, Matt Walsh, or just click the link below. That's Establisheditles.com slash Matt Walsh, or just click the link below. Really, I forgot how terrible she was. I think I blocked that out of my memory, and a lot of these suppressed memories are coming back from my subconscious. I think that's going to be hard to beat. But let's see if Lily Singh has what it takes to earn the title of the worst feminist comedian. So I've been putting this off for a long time. Months ago, I began my quest to find a funny feminist comedian. Well, not even a funny feminist comedian, actually, because

the bar is lower than that. I just, they don't need to be funny all the time, or even most of the time. I just need to find a feminist comedian who can make me laugh one time. I want just one laugh. That's all I'm asking for. I don't even need them to be funny twice, just one time. And so far, I've come up empty. So I tried to laugh at Samantha B. Instead, I nearly died of boredom. I tried to laugh at Hannah Gadsby.

Instead, I was depressed for three days afterwards. Tried to laugh at Chelsea Handler. And instead, I left only feeling very concerned. I'm not suicidal. You don't have to worry about it. I did not laugh at any of their jokes or even come close to laugh. So today, I'm getting back on the horse, and we're going to try to ride this thing to victory.

Today, I will try to laugh. And one of the newest comedy sensations in the female comedy space. Her name is Lily Singh. She was a popular YouTuber who then became a late-night host. I just found out about her existence two days ago. So that's how plugged in I am to everything. She replaced apparently Carson Daly. Carson Daly has had a job on television for about 73 years.

A little mummy reference, little Joan Rivers put him together. It's funny. It's not easy to fill those shoes, is what I'm saying. Lily Singh is trying. feminist lover. She's a big star, apparently. Maybe she's the one who can crack the code. Let's find out. We'll start with this. This is a bit she did on International Women's Day. I am pumped because this Sunday we're celebrating International Women's Day, y'all. Don't worry. You don't have to remember to go out and get anyone flowers. You just have to remember to go out and fight for equal pay for women in the workplace.

By the checkout at CBS. Now, I know there are guys out there thinking, Oh, International Women's Day? Why don't we have an international men's day? God bless you, Twitter. Well, you're in luck because you do. It's actually on November 19th. But you wouldn't know that

because you're too busy celebrating it every other day of the year. Why do I do this to myself? Why do I do this? I don't, I'm just doubting my own life choices. This is the level of humor that we're starting with. Every day is men's day. It's so unoriginal and witless that you may as well not say anything. There's no point of even making the joke if that's what. If it's between making no joke or pulling a joke from a Facebook

meme from five years ago, then you may as well make no joke at all. You may as well get up there for your monologue and just stare blankly into the camera. That would be significantly funnier than this so far. By the way, you're damn right, lady. Every day is, is men's day. Every day is my day as a man. You are damn right. Every day could be your day too if you just went out and asserted yourself instead of whining about sexism and being so damned focus on how everyone else feels about you. You know, when you sit around demanding that other people affirm you and celebrate you, if that's how you live your life, then yeah, you get one day of the year. That's all you get. I take every day. I go and take it. Okay? Not funny so far, but maybe this will get better.

Let's keep listening. Also, fun fact, November 19th is also International Toilet Day. Now, I'm not saying men are toilets, but both holidays are mostly catered towards a bunch of white Johns. Oh my God. Oh my God. Lord save me. Deliver me from this trial. White Johns. That joke made the cut. Consider this. Okay. this is a late night show presumably they have some kind of writer's room you wouldn't know it from the material but I assume they do so

there were a bunch of jokes that didn't make it to air right they actually threw out jokes because they were worse than that maybe there's a brilliant writer in that room probably a man let's be honest no offense could be the second coming of Richard Pryor

in that room writing material and maybe her sense of humor is so bad that she throws those out The brilliant material is that I don't like that. White Johns, though, that is killer. Let's do that. This is the female equivalent of basically a dad joke, but dad jokes don't work unless they're coming from a dad.

I don't mean to be sexes, but you've got to be a man to pull it up. You can't do a dad joke in a dress, is what I'm trying to say. I feel like not enough people know about International Women's Day. I remember I asked one guy if he knew what IWD is, and he said, yeah, can you believe George Bush lied about them being in Iraq? According to Wikipedia, International Women's Day is only an official holiday in 26 countries. And wait for it. The U.S. is not one of them.

That's right. Essentially, it's the difference between how I'm treated on this show and how I'm treated when I try to get a drink at a bar. What? Lily, you don't have to do this to yourself. You really don't. You had a good thing going. You had a good life. You had your YouTube channel.

You're making money. This is so bad that Carson Daly is starting to look charismatic by comparison. People are actually pining now for the comedic genius of Carson Daly. That's how bad this is. Maybe that was the plan all along by NBC. Maybe they just brought her in to make people appreciate Carson Daly more. I don't know. Do you know why International Women's Day isn't an official holiday in the U.S.?

Because it's stupid? Why would we have a holiday to celebrate women? Yeah, celebrate certain women. if you want to be celebrated, go out and do something to be celebrated for. Not just because you're a woman. That's not an accomplishment to be one. Tell a funny joke, Lily. That would be an achievement.

You tell a funny joke and I will, I will name a holiday after you. I'll build you a statue. I'll name a galaxy after you. Just tell one funny joke. That's all I ask. Yeah, I think both are, in my opinion, equally horrible as I expected them to be. So it's kind of a difficult choice to make. but since I'm being forced to choose one,

if I have to choose, I think the winner of the worst feminist comedian title would have to belong to Samantha Bee. I think I got to give it to her. In the end, she's the Uber feminist comedian and the worst of the lot. But you can leave your comments below

and let me know what you think.