The MeatEater Podcast - Ep. 764: The Fish Heist - A MeatEater D&D Adventure! MeatEater Trivia CLXXXII

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

Phil Taylor guest hosts MeatEater Trivia with Spencer Neuharth, Brody Henderson, Seth Morris, Ryan Callaghan, Reva Hansen, and Shelby Huber. Connect with MeatEater on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, and YouTube Clips Subscribe to MeatEater Podcast Network on YouTube Shop Trivia MerchSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Ryan Callahan, Spencer Newhart, Thrody Henderson, Seth Morris, and Reva Hanson. This is normally a 10-round quiz show with questions from Meat Eater's Four Verticles, which are hunting, fishing, conservation, and cooking. But what will it be today? Who's to say? But there will still be a prize with one of the players donating $500 to the conservation organization of their choosing. For the stat of the week this week, we are looking at the number 10 because that's how many pieces of fish were once stolen from a freezer here at Meat Eat Eater HQ

with the perpetrator never being caught. We have no IFAQ this week, but Spencer, we have a little bit of housekeeping why don't you take that away, Spencer? The grand opening of the Milwaukee Meadeeer store is Friday, September 19th, so just a couple days after this is dropping. Doors open at 4 p.m.

Event goes until 7 p.m. There's food and beer plus free merch for the first 100 people through the door. me Mark Kenyon and the Wisconsin native Chester Floyd will be there hanging out. The store is located at the corners of Brookfield again 4 to 7 p.m. this Friday. Come stump us with trivia. Tell us your hunting stories. Show Chester, your fishing pictures, make them really jealous with some musky pictures that you have on your phone. It's going to be fun. And then the

next day we will be in Madison for the tailgate tour. So a full weekend of Wisconsin shenanigans happening soon. Oh, I'm going to put on a couple of LBs. on that loop. It'll be good. Thank you, Spencer. Beer and cheese curds. Well, we've got a lot to get to today.

I don't know how long it's going to take, actually. So let's get right into the game. Let's play the drop. Power resides where men believe it resides. It's a trick. A shadow on the wall. Wow. Seems a little different, Phil.

It's a little different. It's Phil trivia, baby. You're in the great game now. And the great game is terrifying. We have no idea what to expect. Phil specifically asked for five people here and said don't snoop around the studio. So, a lot of anticipation, Phil. Let's get to it.

Our story opens in the mountain town of Bozeman, Montana. There's once a humble hamlet of ski bums and college kids who like to fly fish. But now it's filled with more than its fair share of celebrities, tech bros, and Texas expats. looking to live out there, Dutton Ranch Fantasies on the outskirts of Yellowstone, each playing their own role in really mucking up the housing market. But more importantly to our story, Bozeman is also home to Meat Eater HQ. Or everyday outdoor-loving people come together to produce videos,

podcasts, books, and freeze-dried stroganoff, all in the name of celebrating the pursuit of wild game and protecting the land that we all used to do that. Yes. Spencer Newhart, why don't you remind the audience what you do here at Meat-Eater and just kind of give us a brief look into a typical workday? So how about specifically a trivia day when you're hosting trivia? I host trivia.

So on a typical trivia day, I'm wrapping up any loose ends for the script. And yeah, then we show up here, prep the studio, which is mostly just passing out whiteboards and markers. And then usually harassing Cal to see if he's going to make it or not. And then it takes about an hour to record. And then Phil takes it away from there. He does the rest. That's what a day of hosting trivia is like. Awesome.

Spencer, why don't you put that whiteboard away? you're not going to need it. Go ahead and take this 20-sided die. Okay. I want you to give that a roll. 18. 18. Spencer, holy crap.

You had a great day of work today. All right. Just the best trivia questions. You know, people complain that question number 10 was a fishing question, but, you know, it was still just really well crafted. I'd say you had a great day. Brody, same thing. What do you do here?

And what does a typical day for Brody Henderson look like? Typical die write books with this guy named Stephen Renner. Some people say he's a good writer. So I write a lot. And now I'm doing a lot of like visual graphics, like artwork for artwork for a book that's due in over a year. Right on. There's one for you, Brody. Go ahead and give that a roll.

Where's it going? That's an eight. Brody, you've had better days. You woke up on the right side of the bed. but it didn't last very long. He spilled some coffee on the front of your shirt. Steve came back to you with a bunch of revisions for the book that you didn't really agree with.

But hey, he's the boss. Seth. That seems like an 8 out of 20 day. Yeah. Same for you. Senior photographer here at Meat Eater. I do a lot of product photography. Shooting white background stuff, which is just, you know, super fun.

There is no average day for me. Honestly, every day is a little different. I do trivia. I do all sorts of other photo shoots. I'll sit in on podcasts. You know, sometimes some days I'm editing photos. Some days I'm shooting photos. Some days I'm shooting video of Steve cut a big giant piece of fat off of buffalo carcass.

Some days I'm flashing beavers. You just never really know. Give that die a roll, Seth. Three. I said, no. What's his mean film? it's been a rough week Corinne asked you to film a podcast

that you have nothing to do with really it's Phil's job but he was busy doing other stuff there was a ton of wind some of the cameras died you didn't fill the video cards and said that you'd like them back on time and he just totally forgot

I still don't have them Ariel has them by the way got his ass whooped in trivia this sounds like last week for some reason yeah it's awfully familiar the wind it's tough for you Cal same for you this morning I wrote an article on

upcoming threats to public lands I responded to several other things I wrote last week that were heavily revised and then I was reminded of a lot of other things that I partially finished last week and didn't complete and that's kind of average really right Oh That's a one

I thought I was going to be the lowest Oh no Cal you accidentally ate Some some raw meat The night before It was a horrible night And it wasn't sushi You and snort both

Were up all night For separate reasons You got no sleep You forgot to record your podcast And Phil hounded you And then you recorded the whole thing and then realize you forgot to hit the record button. He had to do it all over again.

This is real life. Snort got so sick that I had to leave the door open. So I could try to get some sleep. And then in the morning, when I woke up, she had tracked shit onto the bed. Oh.

She had diarrhea so bad. And this was the one night where I was like, I'm going to go to bed at like 8.30 so I can really get some sleep. So yeah, it's one. That's a one. One other 20. Yeah. Horrible.

Reva, your turn. I am on the podcast team with the one and only Phileum over here. Where? I edit and sound design fair grease in this country life podcast. I publish all of the episodes of all the podcasts, all the places, and YouTube, and bug this guy about getting his ads recorded and stuff like that. Your turn, Riva. Can't be a worse day than Cal. 12.

Not a bad day. You know, the render could have come in a little bit more on time. You know, but Cal got you as ads. Wow. You finished your work early. It's like 1 p.m. on a Friday. You just got to wait for the trivia game coming up today. Ooh, I like it.

Phil, I got a question for it. Yeah, what's up, Brody? Have these dice seen real action in Dungeons and Dragons? This may be the first time. Oh, wow. Okay. Where they purchase just for this purpose? I don't know.

Let's see. Well, thanks, guys. Today's an exciting day at the office because not only is it a Friday, but it's also a trivia record day. And a couple of out-of-town colleagues, Clay and Chester are in town as well. And you'll bring, being a Friday afternoon, most of your colleagues are out getting fueled by nature. So the office is pretty quiet. But you all make your way down to the podcast studio and run into Clay, who's just coming in the front door, arriving for the day. He's got a little meeting with Steve later.

and he says, hey, hey, guys, how's it going? It's nice to be here. How are you? Good, good, Clay. You guys playing trivia today? Yeah. We are. Yes, we are.

I didn't get the invite, but, you know, that's all right. What are you going to do about it? Well, your accent's a little weird today, too. I don't know what you're talking about. It sounds exactly like I sound every single day. Chester comes down to, he says, oh, guys, hey. Clay, I didn't get invited to play trivia either, but I think Seth and I are going to go up to the reservoir. and get after some walleye after the game, right?

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Clay jumps in. He's like, oh, you guys have room on the boat for another? And Chester turns to him. No, it gets kind of packed with more than two, I'm three specifically. I don't know why Chester just sounded like Clay right now.

But anyway, Clay seems a little offended. But at this time, Steve Rinella walks in holding a styrofoam cooler, comes walking by. Oh, nice to run into you guys down here. You're playing trivia? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Recording at 1 o'clock, yeah.

You're lucky I'm not playing. You're going to whip your asses. Clay turns to Steve and says, Steve, what's in that cooler there? It's like, oh, well, Chester and I just got back from Louisiana. Got some reds. I'm going to blacking them up for the family, didn't I? I'm just going to throw them in this freezer.

I'm going to run upstairs and take a call. But after my call, I'm going to grab the fish and take off. But you guys have a fun game. Oh, okay. Thanks, Steve. Yeah. So, but before that, Steve asked Chester and Clay to help him get some more stuff out of his car and bring it to the freezer. Pretty standard. But now you all walk into the podcast studio.

Spencer sits at the host seat and you all play a game of trivia. What I want you to do now is to roll that same die. If you got a 10 or above earlier when you rolled for what kind of a day you had, I want you to add a four to this roll. if you had a bad day one through nine you got to subtract a four this is crazy but Cal you still won the game of trivia

despite shitting your pants all night and you keep turning your podcast in late so you know congratulations to Cal you did it way to go what conservation organization would you like to donate your $500 to we're going to go backcountry hunters and anglers

please BHA great typical typical call. Okay, well, after the game, you all head out into the hallway. Spencer, you have an early dinner reservation with Shelby tonight. And, you know, since it's already nearing five o'clock, she just decides to meet you

at the office. You can roll over together. And then, you know, you can head. Oh. Oh, my goodness. Oh, my God. What are you doing here? Hi.

We have an early dinner reservation. It's crazy. Okay. Well, it's so nice if you to meet Spencer. Wow. All right. I feel like Spencer looks a little nervous. I did not know this was happening.

My wife is now in the studio. Who's the craziest trivia episode ever? As you all get up and file out of the studio, those of you who have email notifications on your phone, you all get pings at the same time. You pull out your phone and check it. And you open your email to find this very real email we once got from Stephen Ronella.

It says, Hi, all. There were about tenish pieces of fish from the SRME Louisiana show. shoot that were physically put into the freezer this afternoon, but now are gone. Did anyone move items or take items for shoots? Maybe thinking it was something else? Please let me know.

We will offer a reward, $20 for any info. Well, the game is afoot. You all probably have better and more important things to do, but $20 is $20, and with the office being mostly empty, the list of suspects does not stretch long. What do you want to do? Find them Yeah, let's get them Okay

Well you take stock of everyone in the office And by your estimation The only people you know Who are in the office today Are Clay Chester All of you You can look around the building

You can talk to Clay and Chester Okay Chester's allergic to fish Oh yeah He might have done it out of spite Because he is allergic And he's always supplying people For fish fries

Let's talk to Chester I don't think Chester Can lie either. No, he definitely can't. It's difficult for him. Although Clay can't really lie. Let's talk to Chester.

I like that. Yeah, you all head up to Chester's office. And from down the hallway, you hear some music playing. He's practicing his guitar. Something like, uh, that's why you don't take your ex's lover to your favorite hunting spot. Uh, you all file in. And just, oh, hey, hey, guys. Oh, hey.

What's the occasions? Oh, hey, guys. Yeah. How's it going? Apologies to the entire state of Wisconsin. what are you doing here well some fish has gone missing

and we'd like to come and ask if you know anything about it you did help put fish in the freezer and there's not many folks at the office today Chester so it's a short list of suspects well I saw

coming at him strong right off the back no we're just seeing what he knows lots of opportunity for good cops here yeah Chester turns to Seth like looking for a lifeboat did you actually put it in the freezer because sometimes you forget to do things as you're doing them. Oh, yeah, I mean, I put it in the freezer.

I mean, you can ask Clay, I was there. Clay can vouch for me. I'm Steve can vouch for me too. Oh, okay. All right. All right. Well, yeah, maybe we should go talk to Clay then? Or should we talk to Chester a little longer, you think?

Spencer, why don't you go ahead and roll that dye for me, please? I rolled a 13. Okay. This is a little bit of an insight check into Chester. He's telling you the truth, but he's leaving something out. Oh, okay. I helped Steve bring in what he wanted and then, you know, I just came up here, write some music, that's all.

Okay. So you brought in what he wanted, but not necessarily everything. I mean, guys, I'm allergic to fish. I don't know why you're accusing me of this. Did you see someone else handling the fish? Just play. You know, honestly, if I were, I would go talk to Clay.

I don't know who else is here. Hey, Chester, maybe you want to come with everyone to talk to Clay. Maybe? Yeah, I'll do that. Let's go. Okay, so you'll get up. You go over to Clay's office. Oh. What's the occasion?

Is this the Spanish Inquisition? What's going on here? Well, Clay, some fish has gone missing that Chester says he put in the freezer. So we're just trying to figure out where. it went. And it sounds like you were there when Chet put it in the freezer. And Seth, go ahead and roll that die. You're going to make a perception check for me.

Ten. That's exactly what you needed. You notice that Clegg does a quick side glance to Chester at the mention of the freezer. Me and Chester help Steve bring in his fish and a couple other things. Put him in the freezer. A couple other things. What else is going in the freezer?

Listen, guys, I don't know what else to tell you. Chester can say we brought in the fish. Honestly, I'm a little offended. This is even happening right now. I like to come into town and see you guys and not having a great time, to be honest. Did you happen to notice anybody else around the freezer? Cal, go ahead and make an intimidation check.

14. Oh, man. That's intimidating. Clay turns to Chester. They look at you. Okay. I'm sorry. I swear we didn't take any fish, but Steve told us about some ice cream that was in the freezer that Dometics sent us is sort of like a promotional thing.

He said he didn't want us to take it, but it's ice cream. We took the gosh darn ice cream, okay? I'm sorry. I can show you, we can bring you down there. I'll help you look for the fish. There's real sweet tooths in those mouths, too. Chester for sure. Chester looks incredibly shameful right now. Well, anyway, you guys, With the admission of the ice cream theft, Clay and Chester bring you down to the freezer. Cal, I would like for you to make a perception check. Six.

Okay, well, you don't notice everything, but one thing you absolutely do notice is that your dog snort, who you haven't seen for a couple of hours because you were playing trivia and working, and she was kind of wandering around the office, you see her standing by the freezing. By the freezer. The freezer door is open, and she, her mouth is just full of bags of food, crackers, freeze-dried meats, jerky. She looks at you, and she looks different. She looks malnourished and kind of skinny, despite you just having seen her a couple hours ago.

And upon seeing you, she immediately runs towards the freezer and jumps in. We should follow her. You should probably investigate that. All right. You all congregate around the freezer and investigate. And looking in, you see no sign of snort. But what you do see is a gaping hole at the bottom of the freezer with like kind of a faint teal glow around the edges of the hole. It's about as deep as the freezer and four feet wide.

Okay. Well, I've canceled our reservation. We have to check this out. Yeah, we should investigate the freezer portal for sure. So you guys are going to dive into the freezer? Yes, yes, we are. No, we're going to throw something in and see what happens. Oh, okay, that's a good idea.

Brody, what would you like to pick up and throw in? The fetuses that Corinne has frozen in that freezer. Those pig fetuses. All right, take a pig fetus, throw it down. You're kind of like a sound of just like friction, like something is sliding. and it gets quieter and quieter and quieter and then disappears. I don't know if we should go get Steve and see if he wants to take a ride down the portal. Well, Steve took off for the day, actually.

I mean, let's be honest, if that was, in fact, my dog, I'd be going down. Cow's going. Cal's going. So you all gear up to head, just, you know, completely blind into this hole that appeared into a freezer. Seems like a stupid thing to do. But before you do, Clay stops you and says, whoa, hold on. dangerous to go alone and then goes to the gun safe that's over there by the freezer and opens it up. You shouldn't go in unarmed. And he opens the safe and you see kind of a strange

assortment of five different weapons. You see a traditional recurve bow, a 308 Winchester rifle, a massive just like axe for cutting down trees, two skinning knives, a machete. And then next to the gun safe leaning against it is the guitar signed by Co. Wetzer

that co-gave to Chile. And it's crazy, there are six things you can take, and there's six of you. Oh, wow. It's bizarre. Okay. Should we figure out who takes what weapon then? So if we decided we can't let Cal go alone now,

and we're all going with him? Yeah, yeah. Cal, you're probably the best traditional archery person in here, I would say, right? I can't imagine that's the best weapon for going into a hole with. Well, there's only six of them available. I'll take it. Cal's taking the bow. I want that big ass

Brody wants the axe There we go As the winner of the SIG Shooting competition earlier this year I should probably have the 308 Since I'm the best shot In the group What's left

There's a couple skinny knives You know how to use A couple skinning knives And a guitar I can use a skinny knife I don't know I don't get Oh no yeah Frankly I don't feel

Like a safe person With any of these options So maybe I'll take the guitar She does not know how to play But you can play What was your instrument in high school? A French horn? A French horn? Super useful

going into a freezer portal. You never know something needs to be a lullivide to sleep. So what's that leave Riva with? The machete. The machete. Perfect. Thank you, thank you. Seth, you got the skinning knives.

Phil has now distributed some pieces of paper that have stats on them to that goes along with the weapon we chose everything's I only put information on this sheet only pertinent information frankly about only a quarter of this is anything you're going to use

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Pre-order Meat Eaters American History, the Hide Hunters, 1865 to 1883, wherever you get your audiobooks, and you'll be ready to dig in when it's available to listen on October 14. You know, after you guys, I'll take these weapons. You look down into the whole, give a salute to Clay and Chester, who are going to stay back, you know, Someone's got to guard the freezer And this ice cream's not going to eat itself

So they hang back And you all take turns heading feet first Into this mysterious hole And after sliding down A surprisingly smooth shoot of soil And loam for about 20, 30 feet You can't help feel the air becoming thick with moisture

Even as the fear of what may await you At the bottom of this slide Begins to take over And then Dump, don't, do you You land on an unexpectedly soft and foamy surface in complete and total darkness. Everyone around here can make a perception check for me.

So I'm going to roll the 20-sided die, the one that you've had the whole time. There is a stat listed in the blue highlighted section that says perception. I would like for you to add that number to the dye and tell me what you got. In the blue area? Yeah, I don't see.

Intelligence, wisdom, charisma, Constitution, dexterity, and strength is what I have. Those are the main ones. And then there's some smaller texts under there. Oh. So in the wisdom, there's perception. Yes, under wisdom. It says perception.

So perceptive. So what do we, we add that number to our number? Yep, to their number. You got on the die. I have a 14 plus 5, so a 19. Whoa. Dang. I have an 18 plus 1, so 19.

Hey. 16 plus 3. 19? I have eight total. Riva. Four. Yikes. We're not very perceptive. No. Well, other than a thick humidity and a smell of rotting, fermenting vegetation,

you have really no perception of anything around you. I mean, you can't even get a sense of the size of the space you're in, is there is essentially no reverberation of sound to give you any sort of kind of subconscious echo location. But one thing that you three notice is that you feel almost a glow. throughout your entire bodies, you know, like you just chugged like a nitro cold brew or like a, like a five milligram gummy is just kicking in, something like that. Okay. What's that feel like? Or Mount Knops Ignite, perhaps. Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. That as well. But Brody, you notice on the ground there, just a very faint, pulsing, purple light emanating from a tiny mushroom. Mm.

Spencer, what kind of mushroom is that? I've never seen it. mushroom like that that pulsates. I mean, the closest thing would maybe be like a fly agaric, but it doesn't look too much like a fly agaric. I bet Shelby I'll eat it. No, actually, don't touch it. Spencer loves to touch a mushroom. He's investigating.

Don't touch that. I don't know what that is. Okay, yeah, I would rather not touch it. Maybe poke at it a little. Well, not with your hand. Maybe like with your rifle. With the rifle. Yeah, just in case it gets me.

Sure. All right, you take your rifle and you give the little mushroom. poke and then almost immediately boom like a ripple reverberating in a still pond a wave of light emanates from the small the small mushroom and hundreds of thousands maybe millions of mushrooms and fungal growths a light in the space with an electric iridescence bright at first and dimming down into a soft glow but it's enough to light this entire area that you're in okay you stand inside a massive cavern maybe 400 feet high you can see the ceiling because there's also fungal growths along the ceiling that are lit up as well.

But the space is so expansive. You can't see any sort of wall in any cardinal direction. Your only sense of where to go from here is a crudely cut trail right in front of you that's carved through a section of this fungal forest. Could this be what's having averse effects on my dog? Yeah, is snored around? Have we called for snort? Cal, why don't you give me a, um,

an investigation check with advantage. What that means is you roll that 20-sided die twice, and you take the highest result. That's a 12er. And a 5. Take 12. You're going to add your investigation score on there, which I believe is under intelligence.

If you can read. I can bring the lights up. Well, oddly enough, in both the intelligence and charisma categories, I have zeros across the board. Well, you know what? That's still enough. The number on the die was high enough. You only needed a 12.

All right, we'll take it. You get down on your knees and you notice, I mean, you can't mistake it for anything else. Snort's tracks are right down this trail. We're going to have to follow it. Yeah, I think we better go investigate. We've got to go get snort. We should probably be strategic about who goes first, though, based on the weapons here. Well, I'm just saying this is a serious situation.

because this is abnormal behavior for that dog. Yeah, okay, maybe cow first no matter what then. All right. He's dog. Go a bit of marching order, Spencer. You're on it.

I appreciate it. Cows in front. Y'all head in a single file line. Oh, all right. Progress. Down the trail. I mean, you've never seen anything like this before. No.

It's just an expanse of insane fungal grows and mushrooms that some look familiar like a fly agaric or some sort of morale-looking thing, but others that look completely alien with tendrils growing off of them. that kind of are drifting in a completely breezeless and sort of there's no air movement in this space

whatsoever. What's the Netflix show you like, Phil? That has the upside down in it? What's that called? Stranger Things, yeah, it feels like that a little. It kind of looks like that. It's not too dissimilar. Or the last of us. Do we got to worry about these wars infecting us? I don't know. We'll have to find out.

You know, even though there's not a lot of sound in here, occasionally when they get close enough, you hear this, You can only see just silhouettes of some animal you've never seen before. Like something like a bat with just, but a wingspan of about seven or eight feet and a long tail like a fox. Sounds dangerous. Some of the fungal vines that are growing on these trees recoil as you walk past as if they can sense that you're there and don't want any part of you.

But after about 20 minutes of following the trail, you hear a distant sound of rolling water. And several minutes later, you arrive at a cliff's edge. and the trail ends here, but you can tell it didn't used to because you can spot the remains of a rope bridge hanging directly under you and you can see posts

at the other side of this canyon that's on the other side of this cliff as if the rope bridge was attached there and was severed and fell towards your side of the canyon. You also, you know, you notice the source of the running water. There's a relatively fast-moving river that's running through the canyon

and kind of curves with the canyon in the direction of the trail across the canyon. And you also notice an overturned skiff down on the shore of this river in the canyon and there's kind of an embankment about 30, 40 feet off to the sides

if you wanted to get down there, you could. However, before you decide what to do about this impasse, it would be nearly impossible to miss the desecrated and mangled dead body about 10 feet to your left. I'm gonna be honest with you kids.

I don't think this is about the fish filets at this point. I was just going to say, are we still looking for the fish? We're looking for the fish. We're looking for snort. Yeah. And who's dead?

Well, keep in mind, too, if I'm leaving the pack and we just walk for 20 minutes, we're more than a mile underground. Seth and Brody, you guys are good skiff, folks. Are we crossing this thing, or what? How many people we got? Yeah, we should look at that dead body. Are they too dead for healing word at this point? They're dead dead dead dead. Oh, yeah, I can smell it.

Shelby, do you want to get closer and look? Yeah, I'll get up there and, like, give them a little nudge with me. The guitar, I don't care about Chili's guitar. Sure, go ahead and make an investigation check. And if anyone would like to help her, they could love some help. Then they can also roll. 19? Oh, 17.

19, that's much better. I'm not even going to have you add your modifier there because that is plenty. On a 19, you notice that he is almost chewed apart completely. All the fat and muscle from every single limb is just, I mean, it's just ripped, ripped off his body. He's been probably dead for about two to three weeks, you'd guess. Oh, yeah. But even with his muscle mostly missing, you still see a very large claw scratch across his back deep. I mean, just like, probably went through bone as well, like that powerful. Um, guys, what could have done this? That's a pretty crazy gash.

Maybe that creature that was flying around before. Maybe the intimidator, the fake snort we saw. Either way, I don't think we should hang around, though. Some things you do find, though, he's got a pack on him, or at least he used to. And in that pack is a letter. Shelby, do you want to take that and read it out loud, please? Yes. I found something addressed to X. The Morgoth-Mortgoth portal is compromised.

The denizens of the material plane must not discover this truth. Defend the causeway with whatever magic you have at your disposal. I've been told you have a way with fauna and flora. Do not disappoint me again. W. Whoa. Okay. Some sort of mysterious missive.

And also with Seth, that incredibly high investigation check that you helped Shelby with, you also find two potions of healing. If you would like to take any of these, you can spread them out as you would like to. You find a potion of invulnerability, which makes you take half damage from anything for one minute. So now doesn't seem the time to use this. All right. And you pass the check high enough to notice that there is a kind of nook in the stump of the tree that this man died near. As if he was trying to hide something, you see just like a little piece of parchment kind of sticking out.

And you pull out a scroll and it's just got magic runes written all over it. I mean, if you were still up in Bozeman, you would not be able to read this. but something about the air, sort of like layline magic that seems to be emanating in the space, gives you the ability to read this script. And this is a magic scroll of remove curse. Remove curse. And you also find this cloak of billowing, Seth.

You can read that and tell me anybody who wants it can have it. While wearing this cloak, you can use a bonus action to make it billow dramatically. Wow. Impressive. Okay. Done. Wow.

You better hold on to that one. Okay. All right. I mean, you've picked this area clean, so now you stand at the edge of this cliff, a river beneath you, a boat on the shore, and a broken rope bridge out of you. Riva, what do you think? Ooh. I was thinking we hook up a rope here. That's what I was thinking, too.

Oh, wow. We could split up, send three across. the rope and three down to the boat. Yeah. That's a good idea. Very good idea. It's a little more complicated than you think. But, yeah.

It's your guys' call. What do you want to do? It'll work for sure. Okay. Let's do it. All right. So who's going to be firing? I mean, you've got the bow, I guess.

Yeah. I will shoot an arrow across the chasm. You're going to attach your rope to the arrow and shoot it across the chasm. Yes. Great. I want you to give me something I've got much practice with. I would like you to give me just a straight dexterity check. So you're going to roll the 20-sided die and add just the big dexterity number that is not, that's above all the other ones.

Okay, that's 12, and I get a plus two. So 14. You only needed 12. Nice. It hits kind of the post that was holding up the rope bridge before. Perfect shot. It seems pretty sturdy. So who's going first?

I'll climb across that. All right. I'll use it for a zip line. Cali, you tie the end of a rope to like a just kind of a firm looking, yeah, just where the dead body is. And it seems like a pretty taut line. Who's crossing? I'll go.

Brody. Brody first. All right. I'm not even going to make your roll, Brody. It's not that tough. You hold on with both hands. You work your way across and you make it to the other side. Are you guys all going to follow this way?

He made that look easy. Someone's got to run the boat, Seth. You think we'll need the boat later? I always go down to the boat. It's kind of a beat-up looking skiff. We could always go down to the boat afterwards. I think maybe we should stick together, at least until we know what we're facing here. Yeah, I think we should, you know, we could, but also, I think I might be the only healer in the adventuring party, so maybe I'll just stick with everybody.

Maybe. All right, yeah, let's go across the road. Everyone takes turns crossing the road. Yeah. Good job, guys. You make it over safely. Oh, that was easy. Yeah.

I gave you, you guys took the less obvious path, and you guys are rewarded handsomely. I was just worried that, you know, snort wouldn't have got across that, so she might have gone down by the boat. Oh, she's a swimming son of a gun. She's also a good jumper, though. She could have cleared that thing, no problem. Especially in this upside-down world we're in. You make your way down the trail now that you're reconnected to it, and you see a large, growth of these glowing mushrooms ahead of you in a massive clearing ahead and atop them

like a throne is a massive black humanoid-looking house cat oh it's picking its teeth the claw of one paw and it's in its other paw it's holding kind of like a wriggling ball of leech-like slugs all knotted together kind of pulsing in this weird lavender color yep Typical day for Seth. I'm familiar with these black house cats, right? The next thing you see is snort, sitting at the foot of this throne with just a vacant, empty look in their eyes. You're going to put an arrow between that thing's eyes? I think we get Spencer with the rifle to dispatch that cat.

Well, it kind of looks like Seth's cat. I don't want to shoot Seth's cat. He loves that thing so much. Does it know we're in there yet? Have we, like, revealed ourselves? Has it found us? It's interesting you say that because as soon as you enter the clearing,

cat makes eye contact with you. Oh, wow. Oh, was it you who turned on the lights? I was trying to have a little rest, and apparently that's not going to happen today. Come on, let's get this over with. Come in, come in, come in. All right, we all file in, or at least I do.

I listen to cats. Yeah, but this is a safe sounding cat. I don't think we need to kill it quite yet. I'd put around in the chambers. Yeah, yeah. Spencer's going first. Spencer's going first. Yeah, my finger is on the safe, but I haven't taken it off safe yet.

I'm comfortable with this cat. All right. Well, I knew when the beast, referring to snort, returned all panicked. I knew that something was amiss. So I was just waiting for this moment. Let me explain. I was minding my own business up there, where you all, we all live. when a dreadfully ugly man in a cloak stole me away into the freezer

brought me down here and said some gobbledy gook and cursed me and turned me into this abomination and said that in exchange for supplying me with food down here that I would guard this trail and kill anything that tried to pass and he gave me the command, gave me this thing, holds a little ball of leeches in his hand, to command all of the freaky little dudes down here. And after all, you know, Several days of him bringing me rotten fish, you know, birds with sharp wings and dry mushrooms.

I decided that, you know, a little ugly man in the cloak looked rather tasty himself. Oh. So, you know, it turns out that despite his poor taste in midday snacks, he was the only thing keeping me from starving. You know, I decided to create a new servant for myself after I, you know, is he still there? Yeah. Did you kill X or what was his name? Zanator. I don't know.

He didn't tell me. I only heard from others. Sure. Does this look familiar to you, Mr. Catman? The dead guy. I killed him. And I ate him and his face. Of course.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Starting with his nose. That's what cats do. Well, you know, it turns out he was quite useful to me, but I had to eat something. You've seen any fresh fish lately, Catman. Yeah, funny you should say that. Normally, this little ball allows me to communicate with the things in this area. I've tried to reach out.

to, you know, humans like you above, and it's never worked. But a couple of days ago, I was able to connect with this thing, pointing to snort. According to the skinny wizard, that wasn't supposed to be possible, but this life form that I connected with had somehow been marked by a creature of this realm. And he points to you, and it turns out that whatever scarred your pup was much more than just a simple snake. I don't know how all this works. I'm kind of new to this whole thing. I've only been here for a few weeks, but now he's my servant.

I'm sorry. She is my servant. And I'm not giving her back and you can't make. That fish was delicious, by the way. And from this perspective, you all look quite like mice. So what do you say we cut to the chase? She hisses, runs up a tree. And that's where we're going to do a quick transition.

During that quick break We had everyone roll the die To see where they would go In the initiative order of combat here First to go Is Brody Henderson Brody, you've got a giant axe You may move 30 feet

Each one of these squares represents five feet Where am I? Right here Sitting down 30 feet forward Five, 10, 15, 20, 28, 20, 25, 30 How's that?

Uh-oh looking strong. Good start. Just sprinting towards each other. Maybe I should have put you guys closer together. Oh, well, you'll learn and you do better next time. The cat's turn is next. He's going to hiss at you once again and then run up this tree here.

Oh, wow. He's not going to do anything. It was pretend he's on the tree. Okay. He's on the tree. He's going to be watching. He's treed. Yes.

The cat is a good sign. Is treed. And he is actually going to take an action right now. Okay. He's going to try to hide from you, which is something you can do as well. Oh, wow. he succeeds. So as far as you know,

he went behind that tree and disappeared. Until on the battlefield, but right before he ran into the tree, he squeezed his little leech ball, and these mushrooms kind of sprouted out of the ground and it came to life.

Snort is also seemingly your antagonist currently. But you can see kind of a lavender glow in her eyes, the same one emanating from that ball of leeches in the cat's hand. Try to get that ball of leech. Yes.

And what did we do with that Dispel Curse scroll? Is Sprout cursed or a snort curse? No. Can hold onto it. And maybe try to use it later if you want to. Oh, okay. Or not. It's up to you.

Coming up next is Spencer. You're up. I want to run closer to the cat while also trying to stay behind. You don't know where the cat is. Yeah. We saw it going to the tree. It disappeared behind the tree. Sorry, towards the tree.

We want to go towards the cat. towards that tree. Um, okay. So you are here. You want to move as close as you can? Yeah, but I want to stay behind that tree too.

So like, who's, yeah, there we go. Take out causing havoc. This is, uh, this is just for,

uh, scale and perspective. If you guys, you guys aren't actually sleeping or dead. You're standing and you look proud and brave. Yes. Spencer, you have a long range hunting rifle.

Mm-hmm. Which means that you, like, unlike Brody, you can attack things from a distance. Okay. I, I would like to take aim at that ball of, leeches that has control of

snort. Okay, first because the cat is hiding, I need you to make a perception check to see if you can find the cat. If you do not roll above a 17, you do not find the cat. 20! Yes! Holy crap! You see the cat. He thinks

he's being sneaky, but he's not. You're better than he is. I will tell you right now, the cat's armor class, which is the number you have to hit with your dye to hit the cat, is a 12. Pretty low. because you're trying to shoot a specific part of its body, I'm going to add three to that.

So you need to hit a 15. If you look at your yellow box, you're going to roll your D20, and there's a number next to that that you add to it. Plus four, and it's a one, so five. And a Nat one means you miss no matter what. Yeah, bad shot. You whiff.

All right, next up is one of the mushrooms here. This mushroom is going to, You can't move very fast, so he's only going here. Okay. Seth, you're up. So what do I do? You can move and you can attack, and if you want to do anything else, just ask me about it, and I'll tell you if you can't or can't.

Those mushrooms look pretty dangerous. I guess I just move to him, eh? Sounds like a plan. What's your weapon, Seth? I don't think now's the time to do anything else. I do have some, I think I put a little dagger in here. but we'll just keep moving. You can get probably about this close.

Oh, that's getting pretty close to that. Skin and nice. You think you can throw those or no? You can't, but they don't come back to you. So, I mean, if you hit, you can go pull, you know, you can go recover it. Okay. So now what will I do? I'm just there.

Your turn's basically over. Okay. That's all you can do right now. Now it's the big old bosses, not the cat, but that mushroom with the sprouts. out of its head. That is the leader of the mushroom pack. He is going to run towards Seth. But I don't

know if you can get close enough. Nope. He's just going to hang out there. Okay. So now it is Cowell. Your turn. Can I shoot that mushroom? You absolutely can. Which one are you going to aim for here? The one next closest to Seth. One closest

to Seth? Yeah. How about it? You need to go ahead and roll that the big one, the 20-sided die there, the red and blue one. Yep. And you are going to add a six to this roll. Come on. Here we go. 14.

Oh, that's a 20. Now you're going to take that other pointy die you have there. That is a D8. It has eight sides on it. That is your damage die. You're going to roll that and add a two. You just say D8. D8.

I'm catching on pretty quick. Yeah. one one plus two you do three damage blart there you go takes the hit darn it do we know how much health he has uh no you do not okay uh coming up next i'll give him something to think about that's right yep coming up next is this little dude it's a taste oh god i should have win a different route and make an attack against Seth, that is a 14. Seth, this is your armor class

up here. You have a 13, which means this little guy hits you. But wouldn't you know, these little mushrooms aren't that strong. It feels one damage. Here are your hit points. You currently have 17. Go ahead and erase that right of 16 for me. You just like stub your toe.

I don't have any eraser. I brought pencils. Pass them down. So I got a 16? you got yet you lost one hit point 17 goes down to 16 Shelby you're up okay just in case

I'm gonna try to get like hide behind the tree that's closest to big bad mushroom or I get as close as I can is that my whole turn or can I like ready this is as far as you can go show okay I'll hide behind that guy yeah you didn't cover behind that tree okay what about what happened to Reeva

She's last Oh, she's left Oh, sorry, there you go And then Dunzo? No, you can cast a spell Okay You can actually take the hide

Action to hide more effectively behind that tree I Could I ready a spell Instead just in case Seth You absolutely can What spell would you like to ready? Holy cow, Shelby, using the lingo here

Look at me I would like to ready healing word. All right, and use it on Seth. On Seth. If he gets hit again? If he gets, yeah, messed up. Thanks. Remember that. It remind me.

Awesome. I'll just put Seth out of his misery if this doesn't work. I've got the rifle. Great. You guys have a plan. Is this little guy's turn? He only gets anything about this far. Can't quite reach Seth. It's kind of rolls around there.

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to dig in when it's available to listen on October 14. Reva, you're up. What do I do? Roll? You can move 30 feet, six squares, or you, and then, you know,

you're kind of far away. If I were to do this again, folks, I would have put the players closer to the combatants. So, yeah, I'll just have you move up. You're probably around this. okay perfect nice all right we go back to the top of initiative brodie that's you i'm gonna run up and chop up that mushroom that cow put an arrow in yeah we look like we're getting our butts handed yeah it's just the big hole in the table a little disarray uh brodie

go ahead and roll that 20-sided die for me 13 13 you get think you add a four that's a 17 you absolutely hit now you're going to roll that deep The 12-sided die there, the one with the Pentagon face, and you're going to add a two to this. 12 plus two. Nice. Holy cow, 14 damage. Had a dead mushroom?

Not quite. He's looking rough now. All right. It is now the cat's turn. Oh, no. The cat is going to come out of hiding, even though it was spotted by Spencer. It can long jump 25 feet.

Oh, wow. Oh, no. And then it's going to come around the side here. Ooh, it's face to face. And it's going to take an attack. Oh. That is an 18, Spencer. I believe that it hits you.

Yeah, it does. Oh, wow. My armor class is a 15. All right. That deals seven damage to you. Oh. So seven off of the 15 or seven off of my. hit points. Your hit points. Okay. So 15 off of that, you said. Yep. Got it. I have... No, not 15. Seven.

Yeah, seven off of your hit points. Your current hit points. Got it. So then I'm at 17. Yes. Okay. Flash wound, Spencer. Spencer, it's your turn. Okay, I need to wheel around and aim at this cat who now like has me in a Hugh Glass grizzly bear situation. It's like on top of me. And I'm going to take aim at it. Okay. I will say you have to get proper aim with your rifle. You need to get some distance on this cat. Otherwise, you're going to be rolling with disadvantage, which means you roll twice and take the lower number. If you move out of its attack, it may try to swipe at you, though. Okay. Can I move to the other side of the tree that we're around? Is that good enough or not?

Yeah, you can do that. Okay. I will say the cat will still take, I mean, you're still moving out of his attack range, so he's going to attack you. Okay. You know what? You've convinced me, Phil, I'm going to move further then. I need to get away from this cat Move me, I'm going to do all 30 I'm just going to get away, I'm going to get over in this scrum I want to be by these guys, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yep, okay. We now have three of our fighters among all of the mushroom warriors. I'll take a nap, the cat's going to swing the other way, swing it to you again and he misses when you move out of the other way. Oh, there you know. I think you got to kill that big mushroom, Seth.

Yeah. Oh, but Spencer, you can still take your action. So you can shoot at the cat now if you'd like. I'm going to finish. finish off that big mushroom. There you go about, let's do that. Okay, see what happens here. Go ahead and take the shot.

Well, the D20? Yep, D20. D20. A one. Oh, yes again. Rough stuff for Spencer. Who gave me this rifle? Now it's going to be this other big mushroom turn.

Maybe I hit someone in our party. I'm not going to be that first time playing D&B here. This mushroom runs over to, I'm going to say runs over to Brody. because that big ax is freaking him out and he misses whoa so now it is Seth's turn so what's going on with these mushrooms now want there just pretend all of your guys looks totally badass standing up and the mushrooms are coming at you all right so what's the mushroom that's hurt the most the one with the stem yeah he's a leader of the mushrooms can I stab you can absolutely stab you can actually stab it twice because you are using

Get in. Seth is going to julienne the mushrooms. I want to come right at the base. All right, go ahead and roll that D20, the big one you've been rolling. 20. That's a critical hit. Which means you double the amount of dice you roll. So, but for a knife, isn't a lot of dice, but you can attack twice.

So you're going to roll this. Really quick here. Which is a D4. D4. Yeah, that's right. So this is his damage he's doing? This is his damage he is doing. He gets to double it.

Only a one. That's a 2 plus 2. That's 4 damage, and then you can attack again with the D20. The big one, roll that again. 19. Oh, my goodness. And we're not going to add anything to this one.

That's a 2. It's two more damage. Okay. So that is 6 damage. He is... Is he dead yet? If he takes one more good hit, he will be toast. Okay.

Speaking of toast, we should cook them, though. Once we kill... One of these six. Maybe we can get some mushroom powers. Yeah. All right. So now it is the almost dead mushrooms turn. He is kind of freaked out.

I think he's going to try to run away from you guys. He is surrounded on all sides. And so Seth, you can take an opportunity attack as he moves away from you. If you hit him, you could potentially kill him if you roll a 4. So if you roll the D20 first. See if you hit him. Six. I do not believe you do.

Nope, you miss But he's still just The Meshim's going to run away as far as possible Uh, Cal, it's your turn Can I shoot that mushroom? Absolutely, roll the D20 Shit, fire, seven Seven, uh, you still add

six to that roll because you've got a totally Or no, no, you've got the bow Oh yeah, you got the bow, so that, that hits So you're going to roll that D8 and add two to it. You know, uh, let's see four, six total. He had six HP. left. Goal goes through the cap on his

head and he falls limpless. Can we cook that thing? All right, we got one. Yeah, we'll put it in the cooler. So his minions don't, when the leader dies, his minions don't die? Apparently not. No, but you are aware that the cat is holding a weird

looking ball of goop in its hands that may have something to do with. I know, but I felt like we needed to follow through on what we started. Honestly, that was smart because that mushroom could have really messed you guys up. Okay, good. There we go.

It is now the sad little mushroom's turn. What snort up to? She'd been chilling. Seeing it's dad. Yeah, snort is just kind of staring there. Still in a trance. Diarrhea just going everywhere. It's dad die and now is going to take revenge,

but is going to come after Spencer because it is the closest target. Misses. Okay. Good. It is now Shelby's turn. Okay, I can't really attack with anything except spells. So could I do vicious mockery? Yes, vicious mockery is a lot of fun.

Basically, you just make fun of the enemy and make them feel bad about themselves. Yeah, we're going to beat you up, you tasty little mushrooms. We're going to fry you in a pan and gobble you down. Ah, no! Which mushroom are you going to attack? Uh, the, the one that's closest to me, I guess, the guy going after Brody. Uh, the, the, the, the little one or the big one? The big one.

Great. He makes his saving throw. Uh, so, um, yeah, I believe it does not do anything. Okay. Well, I just made fun of a mushroom for funsy. That's okay. He's still, he's still blushing. Uh, this little guy.

there's the other little guy here he is is going to attack Seth because he's right there whatnot and Seth and Mrs. Seth again

these guys are not rolling great Reva it's your turn Reva go chap that kitty's paw yeah someone's got to engage

the big bad you make it's the machete's job yeah exactly I was thinking the mushroom sounded good for the machete Cal's trying to sacrifice you no i can give you can i give riva a potion of invulnerability absolutely you can you can drink that as a bonus action riva so you can still do your

whole turn if you'd like to you can that means you take half damage for the rest of the fight but you have to go kill that cat that's the deal cal made with you okay let's go for it all right riva drinks the potion she's feeling her her skin quadruples and thickness it's really weird she looks she looks swollen uh-huh and then she charges the cat Reva, go ahead and roll that D20 for me. You're adding a four to this roll. Eight. Plus four is 12.

12. And you're attacking the lion. Are you going for the paw or the lion or the cat in general? Go for the throat. Get the paw. Let's go for the paw. Okay. You do miss.

Oh. Dang. Sorry, Reva. Brody, you're up. um i can't move far enough to run over there and attack that cat can i uh where are you it's right here he's just sitting over there yeah yeah he's got it all right i'm gonna yeah yeah you've got it oh yeah i'm gonna the cat's broadside to him rock there you are go ahead and roll that d20 brodie 19 oh that absolutely hits you're going to roll that d12 you're going to add

two to this role. And Brody, I will say that something about the magic in the air and watching snort, just kind of skinny and lifeless on the other side of the cavern gives you a sense of rage you haven't felt in a long time. You may add two to this damage rule. Awesome. Six. Six plus two or is that with the plus two? No, it's six total. So you put six plus two, but then you get to add another two. Four plus two plus two plus another two. So that's eight. Don't worry about it. I'm doing the math. The cat takes eight damage. Okay.

Nice. All right. It is now the cat's turn. He was not very happy about this. Brody, he's going to swipe at you twice. Okay. I can handle it. Misses the first one.

Oh, good. Second one hits. Uh-oh. There's my D8. All right. Deals six. points of damage to Brody and go ahead and take away six points.

That was the cat's turn? That was the cat's turn. Spencer, you're up. Okay. What are you at, Brody? 21. Oh, dang. These mushrooms are lined up nice. I'm going to try to shoot both of them. I could, with one shot, I think I could get both mushrooms. You absolutely can't. You want to see, you want to move around? Oh, you mean this one? Yeah, those two. I want to shoot both of, I mean, if I could probably move back

here and go for a three-fur. Yeah. Uh, make that, John. Spencer, I'm going to allow it. Yeah, yeah. I'm allowing it. All three mushrooms. It's like imagine three Canadian geese. You know, like a couple turkeys.

Does he use role with advantage because he's the, the SIG champ too, Phil? Maybe we're getting squirrelly here. Don't get greedy. Backs up, lures them into a line. I will say this is a very important role, though. But Spencer, I will say, same thing with Brody. Something about what's going on in this camera right now. You mark these prey.

I'll say one of them you can add. you can roll a D6 to add to the damage roll. But first, let's see if you hit. You got to roll. So roll the D20. The D20 is a 12 plus 416. You hit every single one with a single bullet. Oh, right.

What's the damage die on there, Spencer? I'm sorry, you want me to roll this. For the rifle. Oh, it's plus four. Oh, yeah. No, you hit, I mean, the damage. So you're going to roll a D10, because I don't think you've hit anything yet. It's your first time.

You're going to add a D10. You're going to add a two to this. Six. D10. And then you're going to add the damage. the normal die, the D6. Six. 12 damage.

These little guys vaporized. Yes. Okay. Two of the three mushrooms have just died on the battlefield. And the other one is looking rough. Okay. Cal, you're up. It's wounded.

I'm going to shoot that cat in the eyeball. Great. Go ahead and roll. The big guy. The big die. Uh-oh. Four. Yeah, that's not going to hit.

He hit Brody. I hit other dyesol. Damn it. This guy, this guy, totally dead. Shelby, it's your turn. Okay, we're getting down. I'm going to try vicious mockery again on this medium-sized mushroom. My husband just vaporized your buddies, and now we're going to eat you.

Great. He hates it. He hates it. Unfortunately, he saves. Sorry, Shelby. This is a good mushroom. Reva, you're up. Okay, let's go after the cat again.

Do it. Roll the big die. Seven. Seven. You add a four to that, I believe. So you do not hit, but something, you feel like you might be able to swing again. It's called an action surge.

Oh, all right. 19. 19. That absolutely hits. So you're going to roll the damage die. You're going to roll a D6 and you're going to add two to this. The red one, the red one. Yeah.

That's three damage. The cat is looking rough. All right. Mangey. Brody, you're up. Is he still holding those slugs? Absolutely, yes. I want to chop the handoff that's holding those slugs.

I will say you need to hit a 15 to chop the hand off. Okay. I can do it. Let's go. Oh, I missed. Yep, it's not going to do it. Who is up next? next it is the cat's turn brodie he doesn't like you he's going to swing at you again that misses

that hits you take four damage i'm still good brodie's tough this is how fights go spencer my turn um okay i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna turn from where i'm standing and fire at the cat with my 308 don't hit me spencer you haven't been hit much lately uh 16 that hits plus four So that's a dirty, 20. Then roll your damage die, which is the 8, or the 10. That's a 10, yeah. One. Dang, you guys are really, but then you add-

Chipping away. He adds two. Yes, and you know what? I will let you move your hunter's mark to the cat so you can add a D-6 to this as well. Okay, so I'm rolling a regular dice, a five. There you go. Yeah, so what's the total there?

Oh, six total. No, no, no, no, no. Plus two, eight. Cool. This cat is bleeding and looking horrible. Been shot in the liver. He's sick. Yes.

Who is up next? It is this mushroom's turn. Who's not looking great, but is going to come after Seth. And is going to try to stun you. Seth, I need you to make a roll this, the D20. you're going to add a number to it. Go ahead and roll it first. You don't even need to add the number.

You succeed. You try to, you see a puff of spores come out of the mushroom. And you hold your breath and turn your head and you do not inhale. Maybe it's time to billow your cloak dramatically. What's that do? You want to use your bonus action and do it? You got it. Yeah, sure.

Okay, you throw on the cloak. And seemingly from out of nowhere, a magical gust of wind, rolls behind you who whips the coat, makes a cracking noise and this mushroom falls down prone. Oh, okay. Knocked him out.

Number one stunna. It's not dead. It's just lying down, which means whoever attacks it next gets advantage. Oh. With a melee weapon. Nice. The radio live sounds again. I apologize. I love it.

That's the sound of that mushroom in distress. That's right. That's right. Cal, you're up. Shooting the cat. the cat, Cal. If you hit, this cat is dead. I will let you know that right now. Three! Hitchie!

Unfortunately, the hand slam does not count. You know, Cal, them trad bows, the idea is to get close first. You might have to get closer. It's a big kitty. Shelby. Okay, well, I don't have a melee weapon, so I'm just going to let someone else finish off that mushroom, and can I do dissonant whispers on the cat? Yeah.

Yeah, you can. Let's do it. Do it. So let's see. I think this cat needs to make a wisdom saving throw. A saving throw is a role of a dying which someone is something or someone is trying to protect itself. Throw a die to save yourself. Okay.

13, it succeeds. Damn. Sorry, Shelby. I'm just... These monsters are rolling pretty well when they're trying to defend against things. Yeah. Riva, you're up. Come on, Riva.

You need one more hit on that. Cat, feel declared. Okay, okay. Let's go for it. Get him. Two. Not going to do it, Brody.

First off, I'm going to sup down this potion of healing. Do it. So you rolled... I need a four side. Yes, you rolled two deep. Roll that twice and add a two to it. And that's how much health you get back. That's four.

Nice. One plus two. It's a seven. Get seven health points back. I'm right back where I started. And that's only a bonus. So if you'd like to come at this cat again, you may do so. Oh, yeah.

I'm going to chop his hand off again. Give me a D20 roll. Let's do it. Oh, bummer. God. But I think you get to add some stuff to that. How do you tell if it's a nine or a six? If the period is, the period shows you like the end of the sentence there.

So if it's at the bottom. Nine plus what do I add? Hit this. With the axe, you add a four. So that's a 13. going for the hand or the body? Let's just finish him off. Just anywhere I can hit him.

You raise your axe and Brody described to me how you destroy this cat who has... Vanquish is the term I prefer. Manquish the cat. Yeah. We took our snort girl prisoner. Yep. Is it off with his head? Can we take his head off?

Definitely. Brody swung. All right. My goodness, the cat is been decapitated. the ball of leeches rolls out of the paw, the mushrooms fall, limp and lifeless. And snort seems to come back to attention. She hears the whistle, runs to you with a fervor you've only seen maybe once or twice on a good bird hunting day.

Or at dinner time. Or at dinner time. Something else happens as well. Or after she's got a cramp on your comforter. At the death of the cat, you hear a rumbling. up above you you see a bunch of morel-looking

fungi fall from the ceiling oh boy they're not that heavy one even hits Shelby on the head and she barely feels it but they all a crevice opens

from their sort of body and just shrieks probably 30 or 40 mushrooms screaming at some sort of banshee whale it is deafening it shakes the cavern

rocks start to collapse Oh, no, we got to get out of here. What are you going to do? Grabbed the leeches and head for the skiff. Yep. We're going fishing. Well, the skiff is... Oh!

Good tagline, too. That's good. You all sprint down the trail. You get back to the rope the cow shot across the canyon. You make your way across. The cavern is collapsing before you, and you get back, and you see the hole that you came out of it. You can't get back up. Snort with some residual magic she still has left in her barks.

And the portal, a portal appears right in front of her. You guys are looking out the pole. bottom of the meat eater freezer at the ceiling. What do you do? Can we flip the skiff over and see if the fish fillets are in there. You run back to the skiff, flip it over.

There's a basket of redfish and drum and all. It's incredible. Still frozen. Still frozen. You take it. You go back across. And then you jump through the portal.

You all come pouring out back into the meat eater kitchen where Clay and Chester covered in ice cream that's right you covered in blood and weird fungal grows and Clay and Chester

covered in ice cream look at you completely bewildered Clay turns to you and goes what the fuck and then you all

it's insane Clay explains that you you jump down there and came back only seconds later time must move more weird in that realm and that describes why

I just snort might have looked a little bit more fun of Steve, a text, found your fish. Perfect. At that moment, you hear kind of some quick footsteps coming down the hallway. And you see Corinne, and she's holding a kennel. And she looks at you panicked and goes, has anyone seen my cat?

Oh, no. And that's all for this episode of Media Tree. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Apologies to Spencer, Clay, and Chester, and the entire Meat Eater Podcast Network. Thank you for watching. That's great. Wow.

Yeah, Spencer from South. Dakota, he's the host. Using those smooth, mellow tones, he lays them questions down. And he likes taking those two- and three-year-old bucks. And he's an amateur. Lockhound. First Light's Navigator hoodie was built and tested where plans fall apart and weather doesn't ask permission.

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