The MeatEater Podcast - Ep. 805: The Condo Butcher, Bison as Wildlife, and Other News

Episode Date: December 15, 2025

Steven Rinella talks with Janis Putelis, Brody Henderson, Randall Williams, Phil Taylor, and Corinne Schneider. Topics discussed: A snow goose with an underbite; Steve betting on NFL teams because their mascots have grrrr; how dolphins always steal the spotlight; how it's just not "huckle bearer"; the trials and tribulations of butchering elk in an apartment building; hunting advice needed and given; how Colorado has now classified bison as wildlife; and more.  Connect with Steve and The MeatEater Podcast Network Steve on Instagram and Twitter MeatEater on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTubeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Yanni's here. Yanni Chimani, the last. be a lover what up Randall Williams you don't have any cute No embellishment Oh yeah no Dr. Randall

Yeah thank you Brody's here Man that defies nicknames Yep Um There's no way To encapsulate Brody Handley with a rhyme or anything

Mm-mm Good talk about a bunch of stuff From the Grody Brody Brody Yeah that's good Yeah that's very middle school I got that

Well that's the first thing That came to me Give me a little bit of time I might come up With something better Corinne's also here I feel like Corinne's gonna be Wayne has no nickname what would you call Corinne

Um Yeah Have you ever had a nickname I have had a nickname Maybe some people would be offended by it I got a nickname when I went to when I was in Like I'll be offended Middle school

No I No you guys probably wouldn't be offended But um It was Chew C-H-E-W I went to a mean all-girls camp And some gals gave me that nickname because it's a combination of

Chinese and Jew. That's great. Hmm. Can we go with like Chewy? Can we call you Chewy? Because Chew I thought it was going to be like they didn't like the way you ate. Yeah, Chewy.

I thought it was a comment on your table manners. Well, no. I mean, I got a kick out of it. It's just chew is hard to like, Chewy. That's endearing. Yeah. You can't call someone just chew.

There's already. a pretty famous chewy nickname I wouldn't I wouldn't mind Chewico I kind of like that

Chewy that's cool yeah I got a bunch of some some news stuff we're going to touch on the NFL we're going to touch on some political stuff

we're going to touch on some wildlife politics involving one of my favorite animals the American Buffalo we're going to touch on crossbow

is this crossbow love or hate I don't think it's either it's not either it's not either neutral on crossbow We're going to talk about Billy the Kid and Aztex. We're going to talk about, I'll be your huckle bearer or not.

We're going to talk about the Denver Police Department. We're going to talk about a guy who really needs to just buck up. We're going to talk about hunting advice for a guy. We're going to talk about the implosion of the Sierra Club and a symptom of that or a cause of that. Yeah. First off, here's a funny story. Sunday Saturday

I'm with my two younger kids my older kids at work I'm with my two little kids and we're going out trapping and we go into it I'm not going to name the I'll tell you guys the coffee shop later

it'll be like coffee shops around here like a designated coffee shop is a soft place yes they are soft places like the most rugged thing that's going to walk

into a coffee shop around here be like a fly fisherman do you know what I'm saying hunters and and loggers also walk into coffee shop? This is not the feeling you get. If we go into a coffee shop and I'm getting a feeling, I'm getting like a feeling from the person, the gal that works there. So it's like if like going to a gas station and getting coffee versus going to a coffee shop. Yes. If you're at a lucky lills at five o'clock in the morning. That's a hard place. That's a hard place. The people that work there, not the dog on lucky lills, but like, you know, the people that work there might do hard things. There's a place that you can get a, a, a macho or a macchiato or yeah when you go into a gas

station it's a hard place for people to do hard things when you go into a designated coffee shop where you have to tell them what you want and then go stand around while they make it that's a soft place it just is yani don't devil the advocate me on this i'm just asking like

if uh if they have a little sign that gives their wifi password do you feel like there's less or more judging that happens that are they one of those Not judging. It's just a soft place for soft people. I know, but you're getting a vibe from her, so I'm wondering if she's like kind of looking at it over. Yes, that's my story, but I'm just trying to set it up. Okay. I think you definitely get judged. Don't even know the story. Should we just start over? Is this why you invited me here or not? It is. No, you're doing a good job.

Okay. Thank you. You're doing it. I'm sorry. You're doing a great job. I'm getting soft vibes at the coffee shop. I'm with my two little kids. She's making the drink. They want hot chocolates. She's making them. She says to my kids, what do you guys got going on today? My daughter says, trapping. And I'm like watching her for some sign. Do you I mean?

Like some sign. And this is all happening so fast in my head. I'm watching for some sign of like, what? condemnation, clarification, and confusion. Nothing. Nothing. And I've already thinking to myself, man, not even like a follow-up question. Hmm.

Okay? Then she hands the kids their hot chocolate and says, have fun shopping. Oh. Yeah. I'll point out, you said it was a soft place, but it's kind of a soft move to go buy hot chocolate in a coffee shop. I told you, I'm there. I'm there. I'm there.

It's just, but don't act like you don't get what I'm saying, man. When you walk and do a coffee shop. I know what, listen, you don't get judged at the lucky lills. I will say, I'm not going to judge you.

No. There's, there's two gradations, I think, of coffee shops. There's places that have drip coffee ready to go. And then there's the places that do pour over. And they don't,

like a coffee shop or stand that doesn't have just drip coffee. To my mind, it's inexcusable. Don't you think that's far and few between? I mean, places have drip what I'm saying is that there are places that don't just have drip ready to go they say oh we could make you an Americano yes it's a place that deals they traffic and indulgences it's and like well there's performance okay yeah I'm making charge you more for that performance yeah's my other story this isn't even this is a short story I liked your first one here's another one I okay he's ordered them in in goodness so it's only gonna get better check this one out I was happened to be skinning an extremely rotund raccoon. I thought to myself, I'm going to make some coon grease and send it to clay.

Just because I don't know why. This is something like a good idea. I'm not kidding you, man. You're going to think I'm lying. You can call my kids and ask. I got three. And this is not being like, this is not being fiddle, fiddling around. Mm-hmm.

three quarts two of them are on my desk upstairs three quarts of rendered coon oil how much of that coon weigh he wasn't 20 pounds but just fat three courts maybe 20 pounds have you tried eating it and cooking with it it smells i haven't tasted yet it smells totally normal I don't think you'd know the difference. I don't think you'd know the difference. My buddy's like, you did that in the kitchen? I said, my wife never messes me about anything like that. That's just a little shout out to my wife.

We got to fry a burger in that stuff or something. I can't wait to do something with it. And I took those cracklings and fired them up on the roof. I had my kid fire him up on the roof at the guest house so we can kind of look out at it. And holy smokes, you never see mag pies get worked up. Here's my last story. You guys feel free to share a quick story. I've got three

these are all hot off the press show that picture Phil here we go now what people are looking at here yesterday we were goose hunting and got we were hunting Canada geese

but got two snows two snows how is that bird not only alive not only alive but fat as fat as fat as buddy. There's a picture

of a snow goose here that is missing it's all healed over whatever happened to it is missing over half of its upper bill. Looks like a severe underbide. See they're scooping with its lower jar or turn in its head. I don't know

or something. You know Max said Max, I sent that picture to Max and he mentioned I sent it to see if you ever seen anything like it and he mentioned it looks like one of Coke and he gets into its spawning phase. Yeah. a kipe yeah that's it isn't that something yeah i think that the the totally just looks like a person's nose flying around

being totally normal yeah i'm looking at it thinking it's missing a chunk of its upper beak not that its lower beak is way long that's what he said no no over half of its upper beak is just not there but you mentioned the kipe thing oh sorry that's what but it gives that it gives that vibe well you see fish like that that are missing a little bit on what's interesting to me in the missing part is that it's like the nostril like reformed yeah yeah a lot of reforming happened on i don't know why i didn't save i should have saved that head i didn't save that head hmm i'll be able to get it back a lot of

reforming happened on that thing did you check its crop it was in the morning and no it was early in the morning man those critters are just tough isn't that something yeah funny about that After we hunt, we go over to the farmer's house to thank them and say hi and everything. They're just coming in from church. And his wife says, if you see two white ones and I'm thinking, uh-oh. Oh, no. And I said, well, uh, we got those. Is that a problem?

No. But I was scared to death. You got that really fast. Like, whoa. Yeah. So those two were just hanging with the Canada? Apparently they'd been hanging around for the last few. days but she's like no sooner as she's saying that I'm like oh it's not I hope it's not

the hers what did she mean to say I don't know what I thought just like just I've been seeing them oh okay but she's like if you see too and in my head I'm thinking oh no no no no no and I'm like well we got those oh that's fine yeah I don't know how it could be alive yeah that's it that's it yani told us a great story but he can't share it that's right yeah I told you a couple good ones but you can't share them well not because they're illegal

no I could tell you the story about my multiple car accidents in one day that was not that good what I would like to say I told the story to Dan Flores this morning and he sat there seemingly entertained and listening intently so I'll tell it again

but you know a lot of people still think that hunting with dogs is somehow easy easier you're getting giving, you know, way too much advantage to the hunter, you know. Because they're just focused on the shooting part. Exactly. They don't know what goes into it. A friend of mine treed a mature time on Friday.

Let it go. Didn't want to kill it for whatever reason by himself. He decided to be better if he had a couple friends with him. Big coffee shop guy. Huh? It's a big coffee shop guy. I don't know. That was Joe.

Maybe. But he lets him go, walks away from the tree around 12. or noon on Friday. We're back at that same tree on Saturday morning about 9 a.m. So you don't know when the cat left the tree, but... This is based off a hot tip.

No, we're all back at the same tree, the same tree that he was at the day before. Because he said you there. No, he was with us. We all came back together. Is that routine? That seems like like borderline harassment. What, to the mountain line?

Chase him up a tree one day, then go back to that same tree and chase him up a tree again the next day? Exactly. See, you would think so, right? Because it's just like a slam dunk, right? I would think that was a slam dunk. Well, no, because by that point... He's got 24 hours for that thing.

It's the same as cutting a fresh track. Well, it hasn't been 24 hours, but you were... In my mind, I almost said no. Because I was like, you know what? I'd rather go to my own spot that I'm going to choose. And if I find the track, which is usually like the most exciting part of the whole hunt, You look over and you go, oh my gosh, there it is.

Like, I found a track. Like, I don't want to miss that. And we're going to go to a spot where I'm going to walk to a track. But, I'm like, I'll go. It'll be fun. I want to see what, like, 140, 150 pound Tom looks like. You know, that's what the guessing it was. And so we go.

It starts snowing that morning. Pretty good. Pretty hard. It's snowing, and it's snowing. We start on the track. Mingus actually we left without the dog so we could actually just find the track and kind of sort it out and see where it was going

Mingus broke out of his kennel so he rolls in there it wasn't very securely. The rest of dogs Mingus is like so long suckers these kennels that right on the backs of snowmobiles are in the sleds behind snowmobiles they take a beating and so a lot of times the latches and stuff don't work and that dog is

one to start pushing and checking stuff out after he gets bored or cold or whatever so anyways he shows up and we find the track and as soon as he smells that you know, it's, he just loses his crap. So we tie him off. The other dogs come. We cut him loose.

It's just, you know, all voices are going off. And we're like, oh, yeah, we're going to have this tom in a tree in 10 to 30 minutes, you know. 30 minutes later, the dogs kind of slow down and they start having a loss where they're not on the track anymore. It's snowing. A lot of snow, a lot of snow. So we start walking the track with the dog. Basically, long story short, we get to a point a couple hours later where the tracks, are literally, like, they started as these, like, nice cups in the snow.

You couldn't see the track, the, you know, toes, but you could see a nice cup in the snow. And eventually that cup just got shallower and shallower and shallower, and then it was just flat snow. And at about noon, we're like, we're not catching this cat. And, like, there was enough snow where, like, the dogs, like, couldn't even dig the scent out of it. And, um, he got away. Ain't so easy. It's not easy. What's so hard about shooting some cat out of a tree?

so we were talking about it like how easy it should have been and the guy was actually saying that he's done it enough times that he feels like he's batting 300 on leaving a cat in a tree and coming back the next day and catching it again what's a good average so 30% of the time he's catching that 300 means yeah I wanted to say 30 I don't know randall it's because they're going down they're going down to the the another decimal point oh right one at 30.0 Well, that adds a whole new thing to it. Batting a 300 is 1 and 30? No. No, it's 3 out of 10. It means you're hitting the ball 3 out of 10 at bats. Well, if they just did it the other way, I would know what the hell it meant. Number 5 Sports Podcast.

Yeah, great. Yeah. Yeah. Spotify has released their $2.20. So this show is categorized in sports. Mm-hmm. Because they're sports. Mm-hmm. Spotify came out with the top sports podcast of 2025.

We're number five. The four above us are, like, actual sports podcasts. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Number one is the Kelsey guys. And no one cares about that. But Randall's explaining that now and then his girlfriend comes on the show. And then all kinds of little girls listen.

And it gives them a, it gives you, like, like an inflated sense. Yeah. Their week to week downloads don't make them a national number one sports podcast. But just now another of his girlfriend comes on and he gets high.

Because if I was dating Trump and Trump came on we'd have huge boost. Yeah, huge boost. Mm-hmm. Or Taylor Swift. Mm-hmm. Well, she's already dating someone.

That's what I was trying to. You get what I'm saying. I was just trying to think of a famous person. Yeah, the Swifties. Yeah. So that doesn't count Randolphex. That's not a legitimate show. And the other ones are, yeah, part of my take, yeah, like football, me and sports.

Which got us thinking, we're talking about, like, how to, like, try to harness some of the energy there. And we thought if someone tried to pick sports team wins based off only mascot analysis because they love wildlife. Can I ask you a question before we get started? Can you name the cities that these teams are attached to? Seattle. And? Don't know. Because I think they moved it.

They did. They moved it. They did. And I don't recognize any team that wasn't a team when I was a kid. Like, I still have a hard time with TV channels that aren't ABC, CBS, and NBC. Channels 3.8.13. You didn't go to Max. You just stayed in HBO, man.

I remember. I remember one. Yeah, I remember, like, your parents leaving. Like when cable came out, I remember, like, your mom and dad would go out to dinner. And the last thing they'd say was, don't turn on Cinemax. The football player remembers best is the refrigerator Perry. Fringe Perry. How could you not?

No, I don't count any team that didn't exist when I wasn't a little kid. It's like it's illegitimate in my mind. But I feel like the Rams, that used to be a California team. And it is once again. Oh, it is? Whose team is it? L.A. Huh.

I would have guessed that. I'm from L.A. to St. Louis to L.A. Oh, okay. I would have got that right. But I would have got it right. But I would have got it right. Trust your instincts on these. I would have got it right as the old right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hunting big country isn't for the faint of heart.

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December 22. See you in town. Yeah, Rams and Seattle Seahawks. These are Week 16 predictions here. So coming up, we got Rams and Seahawks, and, like, it doesn't denote what kind of, a Seahawk is an Osprey, fastest animal on Earth. Rams, it's like, if it was wild rams or, like, mountain rams, but I don't know, it could be just some manure encrusted. Yeah. And you know, it kind of like grosses me out about actual, like, sheep rams? All the fecal matter connected that's always hooked to their wool.

Yeah. And then some of them had those like grossly outsized testes that would reduce the athleticism of any thing. It's true. But a wild ram also has giant testes for this. But he's not, he's not fecal matter encrusted. You're right. Hmm. So.

But we used to call them ranch maggots. Sure. I just think with the right game plan, you know, you've seen the videos of birds of prey knocking mammals off of, uh... Sure. Yeah. I think there is one of a sheep getting killed by a, or maybe a mountain goat getting killed by a bird. Mm-hmm. If I go Seahawks on this, I'm going it because, um, specificity, because by calling yourself the Rams, I picture barn rams, which are gross.

Okay. Mostly gross. So are you calling it on Thursday? December 18th game. It's Seahawks winning over the Rams. Yeah, now what are the actual people say? Let me see. That one's probably pretty close, I would guess. The Rams are good though. They're both good. Now, if we were a real national sports podcast, we would be betting the lines.

We wouldn't just be calling winners and losers. So I really don't know. Well, like, you know, it's like by how many? Rams by three and a half, you know. I don't know about that. So we're just trying to get incrementally higher ranked in the national sports podcast genre. And we're not going to do that by not being, we're not going to do that by not being like more nuanced and specific. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

It's just a half-ass attempt to increase our relevance as a sports podcast. Falcons v. Cardinals, that's a tough one. They're talking about Northern Cardinals. Which is weird because they're in Arizona, but they got moved too. Yeah, what kind of falcons Cardinals is tough? Well, I don't know General Falcons.

I just don't know what kind of Falcons are talking about and it's like Don't you think nine out of ten falcons are going to take out nine out of ten Cardinals every time? Yeah,

about I think there's more to it than that. Oh. Okay. Like if it was jeer falcons or something, and I'd be like, I don't know, it just seems a little like not specific.

But if you had to bet the money that you need to pay your rent next month. If you said, I got a falcon, I'm not telling you what kind. He said, and I got a cardinal. I'm not telling you what kind.

Yeah. I'd be like, I think that the falcon, the undisclosed falcon, will conquer the undisclosed cardinal. Just generally. And there you have, folks. December 21st, Falcons. Okay, but that logic falls apart if we get to Bengals v. Dolphins. A Bengal, well, are they in the water or not? They're playing football on the grass.

So if you throw a dolphin out on the grass and you throw a bengal tiger out on the grass. But dolphins get too much attention. But bengal tigers are very comfortable in the water. It's bengal's at dolphins. Just so we're clear. Ooh. So we're on the home turf of the dog in the water. I did look it up.

Bengals can swim three to four miles an hour. Well, dolphins are good for about 60. at when if they're at like their burst through sprint speed hmm I look at this one more like I was looking at more like dolphins get too much attention everybody thinks they're right yeah they're like they're kind of like they got they got a little overplayed it was like yeah I just feel about dolphins are the wildlife version of they get too much attention

imagine how cool it would be if you were watching a nature documentary and you saw a Bengal tiger eating a dolphin. Like he somehow caught him out of the shallows. I'd like that. Yeah, but then you don't want the Bengal to eat the dolphin because then the Bengals have a worst draft pick next year because this season's already just completely You've already lost me.

You've already lost me. See, Randall, you should, see, you should have a sports podcast because you know this stuff. Yeah. Well, not really, but doing our best here. National Sports Podcast, folks. Number five.

Wait, so is that Bengals winning over dolphins, Steve? I can't rate it like how you want me to. There's an annoyance factor that I have with dolphins. I love them. Okay. But just, they just absorb too much attention. So you'd like them to lose? Uh, is that me?

No. When I was working on my Buffalo book, a guy said to me, because I was writing about all these different, The reason I'm revisiting this in my mind is because I'm writing a new forward. It's been 17 years since I wrote that book and I'm writing a new forward. And in it, I'm sort of doing around the country snapshot of the politics surrounding the animal and things that have happened since the book came out.

Anyways, it's causing me to reflect on a thing that happened when I was working on the book where a guy said with all the stuff going on with the animal, right? Like there's issues in Alaska, there's issues in Arizona, there's issues in Utah. All this is happening and he said to me, the thing is Yellowstone, it's a black hole. It sucks in all the attention. So all this, everything, all these things you're talking about will always be in the American mind unknown because the park sucks everything into it. And when people think of the politics of the animal, they only can think of what's going on in the park. Everything else is lost to them.

And I think dolphins are something like a black hole. An animal black hole. I mean, they had flipper. They absorb too much attention in wildlife. I did see... So I'd like to see the other guys, the tigers get them. I did get to see when we were in Europe. We went to the zoo in Vienna and I saw a tiger eating the leg of something.

It's one of the coolest things I've ever seen. But they probably threw it to it. Yeah. Oh. But just watching something chew and rip. That's all I got. That reminds me a story I heard when I was driving home from Wisconsin. I was catching up on the dock.

Go ahead. Moving catching up with old friends. Otter. Oh, yeah. Old fishing buddy of ours down in the Vale. That kid, I call him a kid. He's not a kid anymore, but he's, you know, much younger than us. So it'd be like Colin Randall a kid, you know.

He's that age. He's got, he's had more, for not being a hound hunter, he's had more mountain lion encounters than anybody I know or just a dude that kind of he's gotten more serious about hunting but when we knew him he was very casual hunter now he's gotten more into it just kind of runs into him

like tells me a story about watching a kitten 30 yards away kitten mountain lion in a big grove of aspens as you are bound to see in Colorado and the leaves are all gently falling out of the trees

and the kittens just sitting there on his back legs jumping up and swatting And he got to watch it for like 20 minutes You're kidding Yeah Well this year He's hiking around And he sees the head of a cow elk

Like kind of behind a log Goes walking over to the cow elk And he can tell that it's been kind of covered up You know But it's not it's not registering yet But the first thing in his mind is like Oh I'm going to open her mouth And check to see if the ivories are in there

And pop the ivories out of there You know He gets right up to tour and literally is like going to almost touch her upper lip or whatever to look for the ivory and he looks over and eating on the hind quarter

he says it's the biggest mountain line he's ever seen and just full mouth there and all of a sudden the line was like holy shit what are you doing here you know and boom took off no way I trust him yeah and I'm telling you like

I forget him and wasn't Justin Carr and him we're walking down a trail and night and they had one coming at him, they ended up shooting at it. And then he's just... Maybe just shooting a scarred. Yeah, something like that. But anyways, Mountain Lion Magnet. And yeah, he's like, that was pretty close.

I said, did you get the Ivories out? He's like, no, I left. Here's the guy wrote in. This is a good one. In your recent episode of the podcast with Mark Lee Gardner, when talking about Billy the kid's affinity for the song, we call Turkey and the Straw. He said Billy called it a guy. because the Spanish language didn't really have a word for turkey.

Hmm. I find that hard to believe. Then he goes on to say, you asked him, what about Wahalote, which is what they call turkeys in Sonora, Mexico. And he didn't really have a response for that. This guy wrote in,

Wahalote is a regional term. It's borrowed from it's a sort of borrowed term in some regional Latin American Spanish dialects made from two Aztec words Huey, big and Wolote

monster big monster the literal meaning is pretty cool because it personifies the bird's imposing appearance but also symbolizes the importance of the bird in the culture in the culture of those people

Guadolete Monster bird No what is it Big monster Big monster I'm sticking with that from now on A I gave me a bunch of different nouns in Spanish

El Pavo El Guajalote was number two El Chompipe El Fracaso El Pato Mariano and El Patoso So yeah Must be very regional

Guyana, turkey in the straw. Over the course of the history of this podcast, there's been something we've talked about a ton, and this is the last time it'll ever come up, and that is weather in Tombstone, the movie, when Val Kilmer says to someone, I'll be your huckleberry. The hell's he talking about?

For a while, I got duped by the internet, and I thought I was reading one day all about how they screwed up and he was meant to say I'll be your huckle bearer meaning I'll be your Paul bearer why that

as the internet tricked me into believing the Pauls like the poles on a casket were made of Hucklewood and someone pointed out to me I don't know what Hucklewood even is But I got duped by it. I'm like a gullible guy.

I'm like my wife at the vet. I got duped. Is that a story you missed up top, Steve? No, my wife gets dup by like, like she says yes to all the vaccines. Does any, like any like, oh, this dog needs this has this problem. And she's like, oh, we better take care of that. Oh, this town is rife with that. You got to be careful.

Yeah. Yeah. She's, they really, I need to see. Yeah. so yeah I got duped by the internet on this I brought it up to Gardner Mark Gardner he says he says that's an urban legend and I don't know what is Hucklewood to which I said I never thought about that I don't know what that means so this guy he's there's a guy that wrote in he's like a um Josh what's the name of his Wild West podcast?

I got to check that up. Let me go back. He's got a Wild West podcast. He says, Huckleberry, and Gardner got into this. You would legitimately run around at that time. You could say Huckleberry. No one knows where it came from. It appears in magazine articles, poems, even advertisements in the mid to late 1800s.

It essentially means I'm the right man for the job. the screenwriter took it directly from a book about Tombstone, okay? But there's no reason to believe Doc Holliday ever used it, but he's saying that Doc Holliday would have certainly known the phrase, I'll be your Huckleberry, meaning I'm the man for the job. The podcast is the Wild West extravaganza. I've never listened to it Yeah, I can't. I'm not

I don't I just I just yeah I don't know It could be a whole show about About I don't know what Sounds like it's about Wild West stuff And extravaganzas

And extravagandas He says You can't locate any mention of Hucklebearer Prior to the movie Tombstone Hmm He goes on to He kind of tracked down Who started the whole thing

he tracks it back to a 2008 post on Twitter where a guy used the phrase I'll be your hucklebear he finds him shoots him a DM asks him where did you hear I'll be your huckleberry he said he couldn't remember

but probably from his brother Dan and there you have it a few people have reached out saying that they heard it directly from Bill Knight Kite, Kite, the former executive director of the Frontier Museum and Doc Holiday Collection at Glenwood Springs. So he calls Mr. Kite saying, hey, why are you running around saying, I'll be your hucklebearer? He says you heard it online. They've got duped too.

So I think that we can, I don't know, I trust this guy. I feel like when Doc holiday, when you're sitting there and you're on a date, you're on a date, you know, like you're just kind of getting dating someone and you're trying to impress them. I haven't done it in a long time, but like you throw in tombstone, you know,

and it gets to that part. And you're like, hey, baby, you know, that's not actually what it was. It was all be your hucklebearer. You're wrong. If you're trying to impress her. Yeah. Unless she does her sleuth thing, though.

You might just impress her. Oh, like she might not go digging in. Yeah. It's doubtful that she would, actually. If she did, then you know you got to keep her. I think it would be just as impressive to say, hey, do you know what that means? And then explain that it means, you know, I'm the right man for the job. But then she would have been like, well, I know what it means from the context.

Yeah. Or if she asked you to make dinner or do the dishes, you say. Do you think that in the context of that movie, of that scene that you knew that it meant, I'm the right man for the job? He says, I don't know, they're having like a tense moment. And he's like, basically, I'll kill you. Yeah. Right.

He's saying, basically, I'll kill you. Like, I'm the man. Which is different than I'm the right man for the job. No, no, it's not. Not in that, because in that movie, they're, like, going back and forth, like, I'll kill you. You'll kill me. Like, and that was like, I'm the guy. But in this hypothetical scenario, she might not have been paying attention that closely to the plot of the film.

So maybe the context is lost on her. and just explaining that Huckleberry is the right man for the job might still impress her. I doubt it. On my first date, I had to make a mistake. I was in a museum, and I made the mistake. This is a first day or with your wife? I'm my actual first date with my wife. Okay.

You know, they play those little, you can go in those little booths, and they play, like, those little movies, and it just starts over again. We came in halfway through, and I turned to her to say, don't worry. This will end, and we'll just sit here and watch till it gets. back to where we began. They have a term for that these days. Don't they, Corinne? Yeah.

And she's like, oh, thank you so much for explaining that to me. I was like, baffled by how we would take in the whole thing, you know? Don't you worry your pretty little head? Yeah. This will come back around and we'll watch the first part. Denver police investigate body parts being removed from a luxury apartment well this starts out sad guy writes in due to divorce I moved into an apartment

in a nice part of Denver Cherry Creek that's too bad now I wonder like what happened he tried to explain Huckleberry oh man I'm gonna be depressed all day about this guy's marriage dissolving. It goes on. I mean, I just got to take a minute to reflect

on that, you know? So he goes on to say he grew up in western Washington. Okay. Kind of slowed down. Grew up hunting fishing. Kind of slowed down on hunting fishing. Got to his mid-40s

and got back into hunting during COVID. So now here he is. He's divorced living in an apartment. Shoots cow elk. brings it back to his high-end apartment building. It's real hot. The game processor's not open.

He starts moving parts of this elk up into his apartment. Gets a visit from law enforcement officials investigating reports of a man moving body partners. From his pickup. Into his apartment. A man moving body parts into his apartment. I wonder like what the person reporting him must have thought. I would expect him to be moving body parts out of his apartment. Yeah.

Like what scenario would you kill someone? Put yourself in a murderer's shoes. You kill someone. Dismember him. No, but his email says. says into pickup from apartment. Oh. So he doesn't quite, yeah, we're kind of,

we're missing a little part of the story, but he must have, maybe this was after 48 hours and he was finally taking it to the butcher. Of a man loading body parts into his pickup. That makes sense. Yeah. Because that's what a murder would do. Usually it'd be in a rolled up carpet, though. Yeah.

Well, unless you didn't want to look suspicious. Suitcase. Chopped up. We got to ask you. When I see guys carrying a very heavy roll of carpet, I always know. Was it game bag? I know what I'm looking at. Did it look like he was holding an arm?

You can't fool me. When I was doing my dissertation research, I found a newspaper article. Little flex there. You got a little flex by random. How else do you find this article? In the 1950s, a woman killed her children. Oh, come on, man. And buried them in the back.

Okay, but we already got this guy getting divorced. And the cops came and asked the neighbors like, did you see this? And they're like, oh yeah, I just assumed she was bearing a bunch of deer meat from the freezer. Randall, can you talk to Randall sometime, Corinne, and have him like try to practice a little

discretion? We're talking about, they were already joking about the murder. I thought it was interesting. Yeah, but we were joking about elk parts. It's not children. Oh, my God, Randall. I think he's trying to make the point. anything is possible that it would make more sense

that the average person would imagine that they be Yeah if you just assume everything is hunting Deer or elk parts as opposed to human Well I don't think you can fault the average person For seeing someone carrying an elk quarter And thinking it might be Right

But picture it's like a new You seen the movie The Burbs it's the best movie in the world dude Tom Hanks he's married to Carrie Fisher like kind of like post Princess Leia one of the movies I'm still so I was so in love with Carrie Fisher

like I now am very in love with her then not Princess Leia but Burbs you don't know the burbs some new guys move in next door to town and they start doing weird stuff so I'm saying like here you are

in a luxury apartment building new guy moves in yeah kind of like what's he got going on. Then one day he's carrying bloody packages and load him in a truck. Right. You could see that he would think like you'd think the worst. Especially if you've just been watching the burbs. You're primed for it.

See something, say something. The whole premise of the burbs, the whole thing is this. There's all this stuff that's so damning, damning. And it builds you up to be like it was all the misunderstanding. like every little thing can be explained away

but then in the end there's a surprise twist and it was worse than anyone thought my kids loved it when I played it from recently oh so I can play it I'm gonna play it from my kids it's okay it's a okay kid movie I got in trouble big time the other day

I don't even want to mention what movie I started watching with one of my kids and all of a scene came on I'm like Stop! Look the other way. Blankets. Oh, you've got to tell us now. Oh, really?

Yeah, I'm curious. Whatever. The damage is done. It is what it is. Yeah. Inglorious bastards. Oh, sure. Yeah.

Yeah, that's a real good one for the youngsters. Right. Although, like, she's like, it'll just be like a, you know, the killing will only go on for a few hours. It'll just be a tasteful. It's not graphic at all. It's not gratuitous violence.

Tarantino never went for that. Yeah, understand, kids. In some ways, this is a statement about excessive violence. That part, I figured it was okay and she could handle it. It was the first sex scene that caught us off guard. Hunting big country isn't for the faint of heart. You got steep ground, long distances, and miles of crown land that aren't always easy to navigate. That's why Anex Hunt just got a serious upgrade for hunters in Canada.

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okay this is the guy like this is he's I love this guy this great guy but he calls himself out in like the first sentence he does he does this is a good one I want this is one for people to think about Stephen crew I think I might be turning into the type of per I kind of glossed over his first sentence you are you are he says steven crew i think i might be turning into the type of person i despise

see we like him he's a good guy i bought some property in a midway he don't even want to name the state he's like i bought some property in a midwest state a few years ago the property has a large creek about 30 feet across that meanders through and serves as a significant dividing line between one half of the property and the other. The creek runs in such a way

that it cuts through the corner of the neighbor's property leaving a small triangle. He estimates his triangle to be about two acres. Of their property on what I would refer to as

my side of the creek because it is only accessible by crossing the creek. When I bought the property, I knew that there was a deer stand on the small triangle. And after I purchased the guy

who hunts the neighbor's property, which was the owner's son-in-law, reached out to me and let me know that he previously had permission to cross my property to get to the stand. I let him know

that I would have not that I would not allow that same access. And he had no issue and understood my reasoning, but he could always still cross the creek as he pleased to access the property legally. Okay? So he's like, hey, I can get there no matter what. It'd be nice if I could cross your land. The guy says, don't cross my land.

So he says, cool, I'll cross on the creek. Fast forward through the last few hunting seasons, and they have, on multiple occasions, shot at wounded deer on opening day of firearm season from that stand. He says, and I don't know if you would know this is true or not, but he says they all ran off their property onto mine in another neighboring property. Each time they have politely notified me, and asked me if they could track the deer across my property.

State law allows access onto other private property to retrieve game. So I have obliged as I respect their communication and honesty. And because you couldn't not oblige. That was me editorializing. They even said they would not carry weapons to which I thought, well, what the hell are you going to do if it isn't dead? but kept that to myself I'm going to editorialize for a minute

in some states where you're allowed to legally go on to another state to retrieve game the rule is that you can go on to the other property unarmed to retrieve game which I had to exercise one time hunting sandhill cranes in Texas

a couple of times we had birds sail off on another guy's place and you had to chase them but you couldn't chase him with a shotgun but you were allowed to go directly there get your bird come back no gun i think in this case it was also just like a gesture of good faith right they're like you know but i don't know about the legality we could do some quick work because there's only so many midwest states that have retrieval rights however what he's doing which god bless him connor here

i don't want to turn him off because he's like a listener but then i don't want to be this is tough love he's he's he's he's trying to make like he's doing a retort conner the guy writing in the listener the fan is doing a thing where he's like kind of doing little things to make himself seem good they're allowed to go get it he says so i obliged yeah but they're allowed to right but i think they were telling him like out of good faith i don't he says This is why I obliged, but it wasn't your call. Then they're like, I won't even bring a gun. Well, how are you going to get it anyway?

Well, then why not say, why don't you bring your gun? Just in case. Just in case, since I'm a good neighbor. But I wonder about these hunters, like the direction that they're hunting in and shooting in. It's 1.5 to 2 acres. If I was sitting on a piece, it was 1.5 to 2 acres, all I'd be thinking about is what's going to happen when I got to go on the neighbor's place. I'm looking at his property right now. No, you're not.

Yeah, I am. Oh, and obviously. Can you find the corner? Yeah. Oh, we shouldn't be talking about that. No, but no one knows his name. They know he's in the Midwest and his name's Connor. Only we know the name.

Oh, I got it. Because Ray has the name's full name's in the show notes. Right, okay. Wow, Randall. I feel like these people obviously had a much different relationship with the previous owner. Yeah. where they're they probably shooting onto his property and he was okay with it because the old owner was like oh yeah man cut across my property let's all have a good time let's be neighborly yep you know that's the old owner right the whole thing has started to become a bit bothersome to be to me he says this is the guy talking again me being a very non-confrontational midwesterner would never put myself in a situation where a deer eye shot is pretty much guaranteed to enter another property

forcing me to interact with the owner even though we have that right as given by the state. That I agree with. I don't like that kind of stuff. My property is not large. So when these situations have occurred, it is

essentially ended my hunt for the day. How many acres has he got, Randall? Let me pull back up here. Do we want to give away that information? Because then it all said... Just ballpark it. Say 40. Come on.

The guy's name. Yeah. Somewhere in a quadrant of America. 40 acres. Okay. Somewhere in a quadrant of America is 40 acres with a creek. I feel like I've been on that place. Well, I think...

I don't know if he purposely kept it out, but I think that... And it's a narrow sliver. That adds a lot of context to the situation. So maybe he shouldn't be hunting his own place because... Knowing the size... stay on 40 size of his and knowing the sizes of the neighbors are we ready to dissect this

or do you need to read this email no no no no we're not there yet we're getting there my property is lot not large or he did that is essentially ended my hunt for the day as they have intruded into the heart

of my hunting area and very likely spooked any deer that were in the area I have considered telling them my feelings about them hunting the very small piece of property offering to buy it from the landowner. Even building a fence around the triangle. And I even hung a tree stand not far from the property line.

Hey, I'm here too. There's going to wind up being a blood trails episode. Body found in Creek. There's going to wind up being a blood trails episode coming out of this place in the not so near future. So, so he even went and set a tree stand up close to their property line. I just don't think he can say they're intruding. Not far from the property line myself as a major game trail passes right through the

triangle. No, but he meant intruding like when they actually come on to try to retrieve, they are. No, they say they're, it's more like they're intruding on his hunt. I'm baking up I'm baking up. Oh, I thought's when they physically come on to his property to retrieve. They are intruding. No, he's saying, okay, I'll do a quick recap.

But, because I can understand with all the interruptions. I just want to finish the guy's letter. I feel it odds of myself and my morals. As someone who hunts public land in the West and often groans over the actions some landowners take to protect their property from hunters. have I become the private land owner a hole

just to recap no it's clear he's got a little chunk he's got 40 acres I'm jealous part of it he's got a little 1.5 his neighbor owns a little 1.5 2 acre wedge that sits on like what he considers to be his side

of the creek they keep a stand over there when they shoot a deer the deer doesn't have to go far to get off a 1.5 acre parcel, winds up on his place, they have trespass rights to retrieve their game, they go get their game, it's on opening day of gun season, they're now stirring around on his side of the fence, everybody's pissed. I got a solution. It's 1.1 acre using on X's. He oversold it. Shaped tool. Yep. Because he was manipulative in other ways. Mm-hmm. But he, he, like, he could have

manipulated it and rounded down. Yeah, he rounded up, but he rounded up. He doubled it. One, hunting on that 1.1 gives those guys a lot of free reign and go cross this. There's probably not a fence, right? I got a solution. He never insinuated that they're shooting deer on his property either. So they're like hunting an acre. I think the old owner. Here's my solution.

I'd be so frustrated. Let's just build attention. I think he makes a pack. A pact. Because here's the deal. From his bargaining position, he might be on the receiving end of more people coming on his land and vice versa. But you don't need to come with that.

You could come saying, so this guy goes to the neighbor and plays this little mine trick. He goes to the neighbor and says, man, you know, I got 40 acres. It's paradise, dude. But let's be honest. I could easily shoot a deer that could get across the creek and disturb your hunt on opening day.

And I mean, it's not out of the question that that would happen to you on my place. What I think we ought to do just so I can feel better about it because this has been weighing on me because inevitably, me or one of my buddies is going to send a deer over onto your property.

We're going to go chasing after it, as we have the right to do, but to think that I would go over there and bump a buck I wouldn't be able to live of myself so let's do this in the first few days of

firearm season let's round up at dark we'll call each other at dark if anyone needs to come over and check on the other side that's when we'll do it so that we're not bumping anybody's hunt

granted it might sit for a few hours but that's not terrible till dusk what do you say old neighbor that'd be a great way to handle it I think it's the most

diplomatic way to handle it a financial hostile takeover would work no you just bake him an offer he can't refuse does it change does it change

your opinion at all that this creek is 75 feet across why did he say it was 30 I'm just measuring over the on X's tool this guy's bad at measurements

75's 75's like a that's a river he's doing it he's waiting he's not even crossing yeah i don't know the onyx tool says 24 yards that's a lot of effort then for these hunters to get onto that it depends on the creek if you look at the property you go oh yeah that's where you want to that's where you want to be oh really yeah because the neighbor's property is like 90% non-timbered so his 10% that is timbered one acre of that happens to be on the other side of the creek.

We're narrowing this place down even more. I trust me, no one can find this place. Here's the deal, man. Now I'm re-changing my thing. Now I'm re-changed. Now I'm getting like an eagle stern inside me. Bald eagle. It's like this, dude.

The more I think about it, he didn't make up the rule that you can retrieve game off property. He owns the damn land. Right. It's like, what's he supposed to do not hunt his own place so if if but here's here's where i'd play devil's advocate if a deer never crosses the creek right like if if you shoot a deer and a hundred percent of the time it runs onto his place yeah because he's not going to cross a they'll jump a little creek not jump

they'll wade but they're not going to win they're wounded they're not going to want to cross if you look at this there's no way that any deer is going to turn and cross this thing have i heard of this creek before? No. But I'm just thinking like, so if you owned one acre along that creek and he's just, and every deer you shot ran off your property. Is your property too small to hunt? I don't believe there is such a thing. The state allows. Hate the game, not the player. Yeah. The state allows retrieval. What is he supposed to do? Yeah. But what about the intent of of the hunters if they know that 100% of the time that they cross that creek and stand on that little one acre parcel and hunt deer that I don't believe I don't believe him on that

and I would invite people here sitting at this table to ask yourself this question of all the deer that you have personally shot and seen get shot all of the white tail deer that you have shot or scene get shot by a firearm what percent have left the center of one acre parcels a minority minority for sure a minority leave the area what if you're shooting a deer that is almost on the the the over almost across the yeah he takes one jump and he's on if you shoot one dead nuts in the middle of this triangle it's 28 yards to the property line but again and if you double along it you could still you could still you could still easy traverse that distance and i'm not i'm not saying that like his neighbors

shouldn't be allowed to do this i'm just saying like he's right in feeling that they're kind of being no imposing neighbors you know what i say to my kids a lot i say tough titty Said the kiddie. Titty. At our house, they even add a little meow sound at the end of it. But here's the deal. It doesn't matter if it's one acre or another 40-acre chunk. We used to own a 40-acre chunk that had three neighbors.

Each and then one neighbor was the county road, right? So you get when I'm painting here. All of the neighbor stands seemed like they were right on the property line. Everybody knows. Grass is always greener. The box are on the neighbor's place. Or they're crossing. I don't know what they think.

You know what we call it. No, no. That's the end of my story. I'm just saying that like it doesn't matter if it's an acre or 40. People hunt on those borders where that stuff is going to happen all the time where deer running on the neighbors. The main border we had to deal with growing up deer hunting. You know what was we called the other side of that fence? No man's land.

Meanwhile, that guy was like, no, this is the center of the universe. This is my farm. It was like, don't go down to no man. land. I also think it's like, are those guys coming on to that one acre? Like, they ain't going there to hunt one acre. So now you're saying that the landowner owns the deer? No, I'm not saying that.

But like, do you see, like, you're going to go hunt a spot where you're, like, your intention is like only to hunt the deer that come on to that one acre. Yes. If God said, if he said, Steve. you have one acre choose to hunt or not you can go on your neighbors to get your deer I would go yeah hunt

I mean imagine if that one acre was like sandwich between Lee and Tiffany's and and Bill Winkies you know to each have a little narrow issues of land like connecting those two properties I know exactly where to hit them so they don't leave my one acre you know Yeah. Well, it also raised the question, how many, how many deer are they shooting per year? Like, if they're just screwing up his opening morning every year, I think you just...

Yeah, but I already came up with a solution how to fix that. I'm just saying this, dude, I'm saying in America, like, I don't care if you have one tree. Yeah. I don't, if it's legal, if you're not in the limits, you can legally discharge a firearm, you have an acre, your state says retreat. is okay. I don't think you're in the wrong. If your state said retrieval is not okay without permission, like the one we live in, and then you called and you said, what would be the chances I could retrieve a deer on your place? They say the minute you touch your foot on my property, I'm calling the sheriff.

I'd be like, man, we can't hunt the one acre. Yeah. Right. Like, no matter what, I don't care what kind of gun, we ain't hunting the one acre. Yeah. Because that guy is going to call the sheriff and we can't. guarantee that it's going to stay on the one acre i feel like you have to answer his question have i become the private land owner asshole i'm afraid so with all due respect but is his

i think that's more of not a private land thing it's like a neighbor thing yeah because it's not like private versus public you know what doctor said to me the other day they were telling me me there today. Oh, my friend, oh, the same doctor that she's up here, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, she said to me, when a parent asks, is this my doctor? No. No, different doctor. D. She said, when a parent asks a question about food for their kids, she stops worrying about any parent that asks a question, um, healthy choice foods for their kids she never worries about the kid yeah because the parent thought to ask a question she said it's the ones that would never think to ask that's just her a thing she's picked up over the years yeah the fact that you'd be like hey is it okay

if my kid she's like kids probably fine they at least wonder yeah and and i also just think like so this guy maybe's not so bad because he's at least wondering to ask. He's also not saying that they're doing something horrible. He's just saying like this is sort of become annoying to me. Is there a way to fix this? The pact. Yeah, I don't think he's becoming

privately an asshole whatsoever. It'd be annoying to anybody. So you can do what Steve said. I think that also offering to buy the one acre, I mean, if he can afford it, by definitely. Yeah. You know? I mean, if an acre goes for eight and like he's got

15 that he can spend on this and and you just yeah offer him and it's that important to him do it like it's not going to make any mad to offer the interesting thing is done of this i don't even think you'd be having this conversation if that creek wasn't there if it was just a corner of yeah he's got a sweet he's got a sweet property you know what i mean trump's uh his chief diplomat steve whitcoff he's doing well he could maybe go over there and talk to him but hey when you get back from when you get back from ukraine you talk to my neighbors about their one acre all right here's one here's a plea for help I never felt so bad for someone in all my life

Listen to this There might be more of the story, dude Do you think there's more to the story? No, I felt real bad Of course there's more to the story Might be more to the story Hi Steve, I'm from Alberta, Canada I've been hunting for three years for deer

And have had no success I'm the first hunter in my family My friends don't hunt And most of my colleagues don't hunt. Of the hunters I've found and spoken to, they are all unwilling to provide me any genuine guidance. I've received a constant, keep trying. And one day, everyone gate keeps their hunting locations, tactics, ideas, how to contact landowners, how to determine if the land is good, The etiquette of approaching the landowner and anything else you can think of,

I would say with the notable exception of this show, which has provided endless guidance on all of those issues. I think he means local people in Alberta. I don't even know what direction people go to hunt. I actually believe some people tell me west to the mountains, but I see images of them hunting. To the north-east or south. He's starting to figure it out here.

So I tell my kids, it's like, where were you hunting? You're hunting where none your creek falls into business river. See a photo of a guy with a deer in a big wheat field and he's like, oh, killed him up in the bridges. Yeah. So people are like, hey, man, go up in the mountains. But in their pictures, they're to the north. They're like, hey, go west in the mountains. He sees their pictures in there.

They're out on the plains. They're out on the prairies to points north, south, and east. I'd stop asking those people any questions. He goes on to say, I've consistently gone almost every weekend for three seasons. And the only animal, so this guy has gotten three years in. He has gotten a grouse. Oh. It's become extremely expensive and painful to drive two hours.

solo to see absolutely nothing because I've been sent on a goose chase. That part's a little like it seems like he's getting bitter. Fendictive. Yeah. No, spent three years. Yeah.

I mean, how long is he supposed to stay in a good mood about it? I don't know. I've done as much Googling as I can, but even Google can't mentor me. Thanks. please help you forgot so here's the ask and i can't this is no guarantee on my part if this winds up

being a blood trails episode it's not my fault if someone wants to write in and puts the subject line um what are they write into contact at uh something or another the meat eater podcast that's a media whatever yeah type in uh can you find the address like to write Roman a note Oh yeah Put down Canadian guy Alberta guy Head West guy

Kraus guy Skunk guy Something like that in the subject line If you're from Alberta You want to take this guy out Under your wing Send us a note Yeah or if you're like a cool rancher

And you're like I got plenty of deer on my place That would be the best If there's a rancher Who like generally doesn't want anybody hunting but wants to let this guy on just so he can stick it to the other guys yeah okay there's there a couple of emails but just go for meat eater at the meat eater dot com you don't like the whole sticking it to them thing just like you want to keep a positive yeah yeah yeah he's trying to keep a positive he's not sticking it to him or anything yeah yeah that would be very nice of anybody

in alberta you know they could that could help out uh this fella yeah i just wonder couple things okay But Alberta is the awful big. If he's in town, right? He's got to be in Edmonton or something, right? He doesn't say, though. No, he doesn't. But he's like going, if you're in Edmonton, does that make sense, Randall?

If you're in Edmonton, you go west, all that, all that business. There's Calgary. Yeah. Oh, yeah, it could be Calgary. I just want to say this, that if you take out his interactions with these other hunters that aren't helping him. he leaves his age I think that's what that's for

that number 24 he's a young fella he's only been at hunting three I read that to mean that oh you're right it's not 2024 he's 24 years old yeah right so are you going to analyze this I am okay go ahead he's only 24 he's only been at it three years uh

Corinne you're a pretty new hunter you've been out longer than three years at this point I think this is only my fifth season fifth season do you think is it Is it really out of the question? She hasn't killed a mountain of stuff. I think she's always telling me about struggling.

Like, it's, it took a while to get into it. She got a coyote. How many deer you got? She also works here. She doesn't have our friends' problems. She's got six deer, a coyote. What else? An elk.

A elk. And a shitload of mentors, which this guy doesn't. What I'm saying. She's got a whole mountain stuff. I think she could see, she could see more than us. because for us it's so far in our past, she could see that it's not unfathomable that you could hunt for three seasons

and not kill something. Yeah, for sure. That's just, that's my point. So I think to this fella, I'm just saying like, dude, the shit is not easy. We have mentored people. I just feel bad for them, though, still.

You should. Because I feel like people are being mean to them, maybe. Yeah, well, again, there's always more to the story. We've mentored people on, through meat eater that were very capable adults we showed them how to hunt we hunted with them we were successful

they did not continue down the hunting path because it was difficult too much of pain in the ass yes I also wonder like his friends don't hunt his colleagues don't hunt so then he says

of the hunters I've found and spoken to like who are you asking are you just asking strangers like I think you need to build relationships with hunters. And there's a guy standing there and some camo. He's at the coffee shop, maybe. You see a deer in the back of someone's truck, you know? Hey, where did you get that? The guy's like,

to the west. Like his, he doesn't have family, friends, or colleagues to rely on. So like, who is he talking to? Yeah, like, go volunteer at some conservation. Plot thickens. Call a biologist for fishing game. Could be these creeping people out. Yeah. Could be creepy people out. Yeah, like, you're not going to, you're not going to, to get these suggestions if you don't have the sort of built up social capital with these people yeah like if he wrote a longer email with more detail and in it he was like so what i do is

you see people are usually home in the middle of the night so if i know someone hunts i'll find their home and knock on the door in the middle of the night to catch them home or i'll look in their windows to see if they have trophies hanging up and once i determine they're a hunter no but i do think I'll introduce myself. You have to build the relationships before you're going to get any sort of help, you know. That's true. Yeah. Yeah.

If a dude came up to me, yeah. If a dude came out to me and I didn't know who he was. And he was like, hey, where'd you get that goose with missing half his bill? Yeah. I'd probably go, uh, West here. Yeah. Long ways, West. I think we've given him plenty of advice.

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You can sign up to win a trip to Bozeman. For you and three family or friends, so a total of four people, come to Bozeman. They come to meet at their headquarters. I cook you dinner. We all serve you a bunch of courses of dinner at our headquarters kitchen. We give you a $1,000 gift certificate for our flagship meat eater retail store on Main Street and Bozeman.

We pay your airfare, we pay your hotel, we pay your car, all covered by us. Here's the rub. You got to go to firstlight.com and sign up with your email and phone number

and opt in to all participating brand newsletters. That gives you one of your first chances to win. Then, for every 100 bucks you spend at firstlight.com, you get additional entries. In the end,

we're going to pick One winner, they're going to pick their friends, they're going to pick their family, and they're going to come out. This is eligible for U.S. customers only. Canadians, I don't know what to tell you. You're out of luck. It runs from December 9 to December 22. See you in town. One of my favorite things on the planet.

Now, I'm not recommending this because people are going to read and they're going to get all hot under the hood. But there's a very funny writer named Nellie Bowles, and she writes. for free press. One of my favorite things to do when I wake up on Friday morning is to read Nellie Bowles's week in review. Well, it's called TGIF. In TGIF, it's a

it's a humor column. It comes out Friday. By the time I wake up, it's already out. I get up early. And I lay there and I read in my bed and I laugh and I chuckled myself. And it's a, it's, she starts out, she hacks the right to pieces and then she

hacks the left to pieces. She's she's a comedy writer she's a humor writer she does a funny take on the news it's satire but she's very good about ridiculing everyone in a way that it's just funny she had a blip and i was kind of unaware of this she had a blip about the sierra club like that there's been a bit of an implosion at sierra club are you aware of this yeah a little bit some revelations that have cost the sierra club a lot of brand equity um in this thing what i'm going to get to this really funny equity language guide which I thought was hilarious

that she talks about in there but I don't know this the Sierra Club got to the point where they had two people on fighting the Trump administration on ANWR and 108 people on DEI

initiatives and it was talking about that imbalance of core mission to internal politics that have been problematic for Sierra Club But they came out with this guide. Now, I went and found the guide and was thumbing through it. And it gives all these things you shouldn't say and what to say instead.

Like, don't say pull the trigger. You should instead say, go for it. Don't use locked and loaded. Instead, try ready to go. Don't say bulletproof. Say, guaranteed to succeed. smoking gun should be incontrovertible evidence or the damning facts of the case don't use chokehold that's twice that's twice this episode that you've pronounced damn that way are you doing that

ingest damning that's how you correctly pronounce that word damning well hot damn is d a mn i know but you don't hear the N when you say hot damn. How do you say damming? Damning. Damning? No. Oh, you don't think so? A silent N.

Is it? Yeah. Is that true? That's what I thought, Randall. I thought you were messing with it. Daming. Yeah. Damming.

Damning evidence. Damn you. Damn you. Listen, dude. I'd never say that end. But in this context with the ing, I don't say damning. Damning. Yeah.

Is it a truly a silent end? You guys are right. I'm looking. Anyways, I just think it's funny. Yeah, it's, it's, um. Oh, because remember how they said, someone said that D-Day was a day that will live in infamy? Yeah. Don't use that.

Because that makes people feel like it's militaryish. Pearl Harbor. Yeah. Instead, you say, history has its eyes on you. Oh, gosh. Wow, this list is. Okay, one last news bit. Maybe two.

This is the actual news. This is one of those news stories that makes its own gravy. Brody should be an expert on this because he's from Colorado. In fact, Brody's one of many people that sent this to me. It's a policy thing. Starting on January 1st, 2006, so coming right up here. In the state of Colorado, there will be a bifurcation.

of how bison are legally treated now get this this is a unanimous decision from what the commission

yeah and the department of ags involved too they have to be so I might start out by saying how it is in other places let me give you how it is here in the state of Montana

and I talk with this all damn time In the state of Montana, bison, buffalo, are the only native animal that is not legally regarded as a wild animal. They are legally classified as livestock. Colorado has plenty of ranches, bison ranches, privately owned and fenced bison herds. starting on the first of the year I'll get into what this all means in a minute but starting on the first of the year there will be privately owned

and fenced bison herds okay they will continue to be listed as livestock but starting on that day forward if a free ranging bison enters the state of Colorado from a neighboring state or if they establish themselves

eventually oh well but if they don't walk in well I'm saying like they walk in and stay or there's a reintroduction yeah whatever sure okay is that true yeah I think go ahead and finish but I'll say why I think it's true well my understanding is the wording is free ranging bison that naturally enter the state from neighboring areas yep so not reintroduction yeah become de facto wild life when they enter the state. I want to talk more about where that's not true because this is all hypothetical in Colorado because it hasn't happened yet,

but it's very interesting because it couldn't. I'll get to that in a minute. It could happen, and this is why that's cool that they did that. In Montana, so when a Buffalo leaves Yellowstone National Park and crosses to them invisible border, and enters the state

we go who you just stop being wildlife there buddy and they can shoot you round you up lowered you up send you to slaughter whatever the hell they want they don't have to honor it as wildlife but they always point this out to people

if a grizzly bear a wolf a wolverine a big horn sheep a mountain goat an elk a mule deer a white tail deer a black bear I could go on all day any of those things crosses that boundary

and walks into Montana that some bitch is wildlife if he's a buffalo he's not he's livestock which means they're preventing them from ever getting onto public land as wildlife

because they don't they don't they can't legally be wildlife and private land is wildlife and private land and there's management levers that they want to be able to pull yeah they used to shoot them they used to just flat out like

they used to flat out department of livestock would sit there and flat out shoot them all. And then public pressure led them to be that now they have hunts for the tribes. They have public draw hunts, but still they are not allowed to just come

and hang. Yeah, and there's a line in the sand where like, if they get past all the hunters, they get killed by whatever Department of Livestock. So Colorado, say what you want about them down in Colorado for bringing wolves in

and not letting them walk in. If I was Colorado, if I was the emperor of Colorado, I would have not done the, I would have not done the reintroduction and I would have waited until they walked in on their own four feet, which was happening anyways.

So anyways, out of waited on this, I don't know. No one's talking about a reintroduction effort. Maybe they will. But the groundwork is set now. And why they're getting at this is over in Utah, there's a book Cliffs heard.

Utah has that like the Henry mountains, Utah has a couple free-ranging wild herds of Buffalo. And these book cliff ones are a genetic I hadn't even get into that. They're genetically pure, which that whole conversation in my mind is a lot of BS.

Meaning people that don't like the animals will de-legitimize certain herds of them by saying that they're like not genetically pure. They have cattle, some remnant. Yeah. Yeah. Like, like some if you if you take a blood sample from for instance if you go to the north rim of the grand

canyon in arizona on grand canyon national park where there's buffalo that run wild and the park service down there doesn't like them generally speaking they tolerate them kind of they would say oh the problem is they're not genetically pure but if you took 100 americans and said and showed them one of those animals and said hey what is that Listen, 100 would go, that's a bison. They just are. But deep in their history is like a little bit of cattle introaggression. And so people use that cattle introgression BS to like de-legitimize certain populations of the animals.

Well, they're not really bison. Yeah, well, it's not really a bison. So it's like, let's get rid of them. So with this situation, the books, cliffs, the ones occasionally. do walk across. Yeah, come into Colorado. So they're setting the groundwork that as those book cliffs ones

drift into Colorado, it's up to fishing, it's up to Colorado fishing parks to determine what happens to it. Parks and wildlife. Parks and wildlife can go, no, cool, they're cool. They're cool.

Don't mess with them. It's wildlife. If you want to hunt them, you're going to have to draw a tag. Right. You can't just shoot them as errant livestock. And it would allow them

to manage CPW to manage them if they did like a herd established itself eventually yeah it is very much a step in the right direction yeah in my mind and just to show you not even biases i'm like open about this all time i am of the opinion like categorically of the opinion that we could be we could have a lot more buffalo bison i don't care what you want to call them we could have a lot more we could have a lot more Buffalo on the landscape for people to see, for people to hunt

it's like it's just time to get this going and this is a step in the right direction. I would love to see this, I would love to see in my own state I would love to see in Montana the same attitude. If it walks in if it's a wild

animal and it walks in on its own four feet, it's a wild animal. cut the tape Phil we're not moving on another one you got enough man I want to get into this Michigan thing but it's like a long time thing to talk about but let's do it on the next one

we can punt it we got a we got a bite him at the bottom though yeah sweepstakes which I didn't know about I might even apply for this five five tickets well you know what I wanted to talk about he's sweet go over to Stees

but couldn't eat dinner bitch I'm doing it at the office Oh, that's nice We should have put this up front I, yes, we, yes You know what, Phil, let's put it up front If you win at the end, you're not allowed to go to Steve's house And say that to him

From now until December 29 We're running the sweepstakes This should have really been up top You know what, I'm gonna, you're gonna say this thing I'm going to copy and paste it right up front And then... There's a whole reason why it was... Okay, so if you're sitting here listening at home,

people will get to the end and hear you say, Hey, Phil, put this up front. And you've already heard me say this. Duh. I already said it. We're running a sweepstakes from now until December 29th. This is a hell of a sweepstakes deal. Mm-hmm.

What you get? You get a trip to Bozeman. So we cover round-trip airfare for you and three friends or family members. So a total of four people. We cover your airfare, your lodging, and your car. You stay two nights in town. I cook dinner. We'll do it here at our headquarters kitchen, and I'll get some of the guys to help out.

Some of the, I'll just put out at all company for helpers. We will cook you a many-course meal. I will serve it to you personally. We will give you a $1,000 gift card to our retail store on Main Street. you know I'm going to throw this out there and we'll arrange for you to go down there privately if you'd like you can go down there after hours with Alec do they get to pick when they come out he's going to love that

or do you have like you know what I mean Alex Zimmer what's that do they get to pay when they shop or is it a specific time no no we'll pick a time that works for them we'll pick a mutually agreeable time you and three of your friends three family members whatever we pay your airfare you come out you got to come from

America. You do. Canadians cannot do this. Listen. Raffling sweepstakes law is a Byzantine world, dude. Thorny. You got to be in America. Jump Montana.

Never mind. The new driver's license deal cracks me up. If you get a new driver's license, if you're like American, you get an eagle on your driver's license. Oh, so now the new driver's license. Oh, so now the new driver's license. driver's license will qualify for the for the proper ID for flying real no we already have what do you mean not a naturalized citizen I believe I believe I believe they just passed

the state law that if you're like a citizen you get an eagle too oh I see yeah no we already have real ID they just kept postponing it because of the pandemic I've been real ID for a while anyhow now I'm getting my new one with an American eagle on it which I'm going to keep out of my wallet. It's to show people. Proudly display. You got to come from America. Okay.

I'm getting to the rules. Why did someone scratch the rules out? Fine. Go for the rules. I scratched them out because I thought it'd be like a little too. Those aren't the rules. Yeah. Oh.

You know. Those aren't the rules. You already went over all that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's, oh, no, no, no. The rules aren't scratched.

How do you enter, Steve? How is one eligible for such a giveaway? Did I say, round trip. Airfare, lodging, rental car, dinner, cooked here by me, $1,000 gift cart. $1K. Alex Zimmer, I'm volunteering him, will give you private access to the store. The worst actor in the company. That means you know he'll be telling you the truth.

One of the finest dog sitters this company has. Probably the, I haven't told him this. probably the worst actor we've ever hired he won't try and sell you something you don't need no that's the thing you can trust this guy because me and Randall tried to get him to act yeah he's straight as an arrow

doesn't have any there's no concern that he's BS and yeah if he tells you something it's the truth you should try to give him a couple pointers Phil I try to give him some tips I'll try you know for how often you talk to me about me doing plays I've never once been asked to act in any sort of

skit or any sort of commercially done at this company. Are you kidding me? I've seen your face. You've done acting. I have not. I did the Christmas video, but that was different. That was different. That's shocking. Phil, I've cast you in two plays on radio live. I've given you two roles. I've greatly

appreciate that. I guess you mean like the Instagram social skits. Phil, I'm working on some skits. Johnny's bumped me from Ross three times now. Yeah, we're filming one tomorrow. We didn't cast Phil in it. We'll make a great elf. We might be filming two tomorrow. I'll get, make sure it fills in on the second one. I got cast. Randall's cast and Brianna got cast. She's Mrs. Claus.

So hold on it. I got it. So you, so someone sitting at home and thinking, someone's thinking, well, they're not just going to call me up and give it to me. And you're right. You got to go online. This is grossly oversimplified unless they simplify it. That's what I got. listen go to first light dot i'm not going to tell you the rules because i think there's a way to enter like there's a way to enter free and there's a way to boost your entries right but we have to tell them how to enter go to first light dot com and see you'll see something about sweepstakes okay i believe i believe there's a way to enter free which you have to do in sweepstakes law and then

for every hundred bucks you spend at first light, you get five entries. So does a rub? Mm-hmm. There's a rub. You can increase your chance. Like everything in life, the affluent

will be favored. I can't help it. I can't help it. They tend to spend more money. I don't know. I'm not making it up. Don't you agree? Yeah.

Ending on a hard truth. that today. Well, folks. I'm sorry you had to hear that twice, I guess. Maybe you can clean it up and make a sound more optimistic on the first one. Yeah, sure, yeah. I mean, a hundred bucks gets you five entries. That's pretty good. Yeah, anybody can afford that. That's what I always say. 20 bucks a ticket, plus you're spending that money on something you wanted to buy anyway. Yeah, Randall blows like 10 times that.

He'd just fly himself out here. Randall blows 10 times that every year at the Sportsman's Expo looking for tags. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, this might be one of the higher odds entries you'll get in this tag season. Yeah, strong season. We have lots of quarter zips for probably right at 100 bucks, a little bit under 100 bucks, maybe a little bit over 100 bucks. Quarter zips are the thing this holiday season. I keep hearing about that.

For men. So if you're looking for quarter zips, go to First Light.com. My kids have told me the opposite. They've hit peak quarter zip, they told me. Because it's people, they think it's people trying to look. Um, they think it's people trying to look, um, studious. Mm. That's their take on it.

Hmm. I can see them. They're, they're thinking of like a sweater. Yeah. Like a formal sweater. Yeah. Not like a, not like Marino bass layer quarter zip. No, but I could see a kiln, uh, quarter zip, uh, being dressed down for a drink at

the bar or being dressed up for a job interview. Mm. Sure. Okay. So that's what you. you got to do. Put a little collar underneath that thing. Big old dinner. Big old dinner. Shop and spree with Alex

Alex the actor. That's what we call them. Firstlight.com. Check it out. While you're there, pick up a f-up old trucks calendar. We're getting out of the calendar business. This is your last chance ever to get a calendar. I will, I swear. I will never make another calendar.

Will you let me one if I could, let me make one? If I come up with a good idea? I'm walking away from calendars. Why? It's too fickle of a business. Who'd have thought that print calendars would fade out? We tried to buck the trend. We rode that way while we could.

Inevitably, people like it or not are moving away from print calendar. The only takeaway I got from last year's calendar was that we didn't make enough of them. Because at the Hunt Expo, I probably had. That's what he said. It's fickle, man. It's a fickle business. Two dozen people come up to me at the Hunt Expo wondering if we had extra calendars. there. And I took

them off the walls of people around the office and sent them to these people. Because I think effed up old shitters was like as good as you could do. As good as you could do. It's like Rocky 4. It was like

Clay's mom would have two reasons to wash his mouth out. If he said the name of that calendar. We just need to get more provocative. And now that we're around to old trucks, I want wanted to do old fishermen, effed up old fishermen. I'm done.

I'm out of the business. I was looking forward to to I'd be in that calendar. Out of the business. You mark my words. If you want a calendar, and this is not a sales ploy, but I'll point out,

if you were to want one of our calendars, now or never, sucker. Yep. But I'm not saying it because of salesmanship. Done, done, done. Done. Don't the business. It's a fickle business.

People are moving away. Me and Brody's wagon wheel went, business went tits up, too. Yep. land speculation business that didn't work out check we had a little check business printing checks our mailbox business is slowing down

oil lamps we're sitting on gallons of whale oil and now the print calendar thing's slowing down but we're pretty optimistic about our VHS we're invested heavily in VHS we're invested heavily in VHs H.S technology. And quarters it.

Coal furnaces. DVD. Oh, you know, it's the farmer that had the field that had the, the goose missing its bill. I noticed he heats a coal, big old bucket of coal. Wow. Yeah. He had a big metal tub next to his stove full coal. I feel like he must have his own coal scene.

I won't be surprised these guys' own coal scene. Yeah, that was cool to see. Yeah, I wouldn't know where you'd, I don't even know where to start. Like, where you got to get a lot of coal scene. Yeah, we drove off. I'm like, do you know what that guy I was heating with? And they're so young, they saw it, but they didn't know what they were looking at. I said, that big tub, like with the rocks.

I was like, that dude's cold, man. Dude's heat with coal. Yeah, that's cool. Right in the living room, big bucket of coal. I always wondered if that would work in one of those titanium, uh, seek stoves. Camp stove. Yeah. A couple of those in there.

Why not? All right, Phil, you can probably turn it off any time now, man. Did you cut the tape earlier? I cut it when you ask me. Oh, okay. Sorry about that. So this is all just bonus. That was just pretty banter for our own amusement.

Hey, you're looking for a good solid sweepstakes? Like the kind of sweepstakes you can sink your teeth into. Well, I got it for you right here, buddy. You can sign up to win a trip to Bozeman for you and three family or friends. So a total of four people. Come to Bozeman. They come to meet at their headquarters. I cook you dinner.

We all serve you a bunch of courses of dinner at our headquarters kitchen. We give you a thousand dollar gift certificate for our, flagship meat eater retail store on main street and bozeman we pay your airfare we pay your hotel we pay your car all covered by us here's the rub you got to go to first light dot com and sign up with your email and phone number and opt in to all participating brand newsletters that gives you one of your first chances to win then for every hundred bucks you spend at first light You get additional entries, okay? In the end, we're going to pick one winner.

They're going to pick their friends, they're going to pick their family, and they're going to come out. This is eligible for U.S. customers only. Canadians, I don't know what to tell you. You're out of luck. It runs from December 9 to December 22. See you in town. This is an I-Heart podcast, Guaranteed Human.