The Mind Over Finger Podcast - 235 Sustainable Progress – 5 Practice Shifts That Prevent Burnout and Boost Results

Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to the Mind Over Finger podcast. This is episode 235, the seventh episode of your Reset and Rise summer series. This one is all about strategy. You're going to learn how to make small shifts that can lead to big personalized change and start aligning your practice with who you are and what you really want. welcome to the mind over finger podcast where we dive into the world of mindful music making peak performance and crafting a purpose-driven life and career i'm your host violinist certified performance and life coach for musicians and your guide to unlocking your full potential

Starting point is 00:00:47 Dr. René-Paul Gaultier. Hello there and welcome back to your Reset and Rise summer series. I'm so glad you're here. This episode is part of a special 10-episode journey I created just for you this summer to help you reignite your spark, rethink your practice, and show up with more clarity, confidence, and joy. Each episode builds on the last, so if you're just joining us, feel free to hop back to episode 229 and catch up. The series follows a clear arc. We start with reigniting your joy and connection to music. Then we move into mindset tools like alignment, patience, and self-compassion to bring more ease and clarity to your work. After that, we clear away hidden obstacles. And finally, we wrap up with powerful tools to help you

Starting point is 00:01:44 manage your mind and build real momentum. And if you're ready to go even deeper, check out my course Practicing for Peak Performance. It's your full blueprint for performance success. And when you join this summer, you're going to get my Performance Anxiety Solution course for free. All the details are at mindoverfinger.com and the link is in the show notes. All right, ready to reset and rise? Let's dive in. Hi, everyone. I hope you're doing amazing. Today's show is part two of my answer to Jean's question, what are some of the most

Starting point is 00:02:31 common mistakes I see musicians make? And today, I'm going to keep going, starting with number six. A quick recap of what I shared at first. Mystic number one, not meeting yourself where you are. Mystic number two, not having a plan that works for you. Mystic number three, not managing your time in a way that works for you. Number four, under-consuming and over-consuming, and that is in every aspect. And finally, mystic number five, smart musicians make is not trusting yourself. Okay, back to our mistakes. And kind of the same way I did in the first part of the series, I want to remind you to take the word mistake with a grain of salt. I'm a huge fan of the author

Starting point is 00:03:19 Gretchen Rubin, and I love one of her secrets to adulthood. The opposite of a profound truth is also true. And I'll quote her on this here. She says, this is a mysterious and powerful aspect of the human nature. I want to accept myself and expect more from myself. I want to think about myself so I can forget about myself. I want to use my time efficiently and I want to take time to wonder and play. Strive to be emotionally self-sufficient so I can connect better with other people. An aspect of the secret of adulthood is the ancient idea that sometimes something goes so far in one direction that it circles back on itself in a kind of union of opposites.

Starting point is 00:04:14 Don't you find that to be true for yourself as well? So let's keep in mind that there are times when doing the things I list here as quote-unquote mistakes is desirable and would serve you. So the only goal here is to get us to pay attention to what's happening, to what we need, and move forward with awareness as to what we decide to intentionally continue doing. Okay, now that we cleared that up, let's go. 10 Mistakes Smart Musicians Make and How to Overcome Them, Part 2. Here we go. mistake number six over committing yourself and i find this to be true regardless of whether you're a student an amateur or a professional that's actually one of the lessons that's taking me the longest to learn and i'm using present tense because saying no to something that sounds fun

Starting point is 00:05:15 or challenging is still one of the hardest things to do for me and raise your hand hi if you're with me on this boat. So whether you're seeking more experience, more connections, more money, more recognition, it can be so very difficult to say no to things. But not surprisingly, what can end up happening when we do this is we can't bring the quality that we would want to to the projects we say yes to. And ultimately, it can significantly delay the achievement of the things we're really going for. Being overcommitted also affects our health negatively, both physical and mental, that is. And I'm not saying that we can have a perfectly balanced life at all times and that there aren't moments when we get really, really busy pursuing 100% worthy

Starting point is 00:06:08 opportunities. And there are absolutely moments when we do have to say yes to things to pay our bills or help someone or get experience. The one thing I would encourage you to do if you find yourself constantly overcommitted is to reflect on what your goals really are and if the things you say yes to support you in this direction. What are you really after? What kind of life do you want? And is saying yes to this new offer supporting you towards that life or is it just a temporary boost of those things I mentioned earlier, money, recognition, etc. Finding the balance is once again something you're going to figure out as you go. Just pay attention to what you're saying yes to and how it supports you short and long term. Also very important, ask yourself

Starting point is 00:07:07 if you're committing to something out of fear, out of a need to have a backup plan because you're afraid you're not going to be able to achieve what it is that you really want. And I'm not saying one shouldn't have a backup plan. Just have this awareness of what is motivating you to say yes to yet another engagement. And if it's fear of failure, there is a great reflection to be had there. And just to be sure, I want to mention that overcommitment is not the same as not managing your time, which I talked about in the last episode. Someone could manage their time really well and be able to do everything, but that doesn't mean you should do everything. You know you're overcommitted when you feel depleted and you don't have time to tend to the fundamentals

Starting point is 00:08:02 anymore. So the key thing here is this awareness of where your intentions are going, your energy, your physical, mental, and emotional reserves. Mistake number seven, comparing yourself. I don't need to go at length for this one. You heard it before from everyone, everywhere. comparison is the thief of joy. Yes, absolutely. It can take you down a deep, deep hole. And there are two things I'd like to offer to you in addition to this. Maybe you've heard those before as well, but it's always a good reminder I find, at least for myself. First thing is comparing yourself to others is absolutely normal if you're a human being. If we go back thousands of years, it was a survival mechanism so we could assess if the person standing in front

Starting point is 00:09:02 of us was going to be a threat or a friend. So when you do it, don't make things worse by beating yourself up about it. Don't add guilt of comparison to the pain you're already experiencing. It's totally normal. Offer yourself a lot of compassion. Compassion for the person who has aspiration and maybe is not quite where they want to be. Just lots of love. Second is notice what you're comparing. That little tinge of envy, of jealousy perhaps. What if it's a sign of the things you truly want and aspire to? So get curious about what it is that you're seeing that is appealing to you? Is that something you really want? Do you think it's something that would make you happy ultimately? If you do want something similar, how could you make that happen for yourself?

Starting point is 00:10:04 What are some steps you could take towards this? Or would this actually be good for you? There definitely are circumstances when envy does not pass the scrutiny test, where we realize that what at first appeared enticing is not something that we want at all. So again, awareness. When you notice comparison is happening, give yourself some slack, give yourself some love, give the other person some love as well, and make a mental note to explore. Mistake number eight, trying to impress. Now, this one is also something that is so totally normal. At the fundamental level, as humans, we want to feel accepted. We want to belong. We want our peers to value us. So again, wanting to impress is a totally normal human emotion. But what's good to know is that

Starting point is 00:11:06 trying to impress or focusing on what others think while we play stifles us. It's understandable to want to impress a jury if you're playing a competition or an audition, but unfortunately, this will most often than not play against you. It's going to take you away from your ability to experience flow. You're going to be so busy battling your own thoughts and analyzing everything from what you think others' perspective is. You're going to be expending a great amount of energy trying to control a lot of parameters that should be left alone during a performance. Do all of this work, analyzing and assessing in the practice room, but on stage, you must let go of trying to please others. Very much like focusing on the journey itself helps us reach our

Starting point is 00:12:00 goals. Focusing on the moment-to-moment experience as we perform allows us to play at our best. A client of mine brought my attention to this beautiful interview with Barbara Hannigan. And if I remember, I'll put a link in the show notes, or if not, just send me an email to get the link. But yes, this interview where she talks about how when we try to impress, we can't express. I've always find that to be true in my own playing. So when you step on stage, focus on the moment and your own inner experience. Let go of your expectations to please and impress others. Okay, we're getting close. Mistake number nine, not giving yourself enough time to prepare for a performance. I find that so often people underestimate how much time it takes to prepare

Starting point is 00:12:54 for a performance. It takes a lot of time. Of course, it really varies from person to person, so it's really important to know yourself. Most professionals have learned, oftentimes the hard way, how much time they need to learn a piece or prepare a program. And if you have not, err on the side of caution and make sure you give yourself plenty of time. It takes a long time for the brain to create all of the neural pathways necessary for us to feel comfortable with a new skill or a new difficult piece. We need a lot of nights. We need a lot of sleeps on this. And space repetition is your best friend. So plan for a longer rather than shorter preparation time. One way to think about it is like how you strengthen a friendship, like getting to know a

Starting point is 00:13:47 friend. Sure, you can spend a few intense hours with someone and feel like you've met your very new best friend. And that also happens with repertoire at times, depending on your level. But usually, friendship develops over time. You start with coffee, you meet for a meal, you go on hikes together, you create opportunities to strengthen your friendship bond with a new friend with many visits and many shared experiences. And over time, the bond solidifies. You want to give your pieces the same opportunities. You need spaced repetitions for the skills to be acquired and the material to be anchored. The brain needs to have many opportunities to sleep on it, literally. You need opportunities to forget the material, to relearn it, to anchor it and master

Starting point is 00:14:40 it. Then it feels like a great friend it's good to spend time with on stage. So keep that in mind. Time is your ally. Time and sleep. And finally, mystic number 10 smart musicians make. Not paying yourself first in the practice room. Maybe you've heard this expression. It was really popular in the financial world in the late 90s and people still talk about it because it's a good idea. It's the principle that to save money for a project or for retirement, you need to pay yourself first. You set up a bank account where you get 10% of your paycheck automatically deducted every week. And we can use that in the practice room as well. One of the best ways to keep music making fun, engaging, interesting, and meaningful for yourself is to pay yourself first. Keep a

Starting point is 00:15:36 little bit of time, each practice, to dedicate to something that is deeply interesting or meaningful for you. If you're not sure how long you should give yourself, just go with that principle of 10%. 10% of one hour is six minutes. If you have tons of work to do, I know it might feel like you cannot spare six minutes, but I promise you that six minutes of self-nurturing can make the other 54 so much more efficient. It's going to recalibrate your levels of energy and enjoyment in practice. Start the session with it and with it or do it in the middle to break up the intense focus. It does not matter. But give yourself this gift. It's going to stimulate your focus and keep you in alignment with your bigger purpose. And you can do anything you'd like. Play

Starting point is 00:16:30 long tones, read a movement of Bach, improvise, play a fiddle tune, anything that you look forward to and that will boost your enthusiasm. And if that means nothing to you when I say you deserve it or it feels like an unnecessary luxury to you, then I'm telling you, you cannot afford not to do it. Research shows that leaving space for this type of play helps fight fatigue, boredom, stress, and burnout, and boosts creativity and problem solving, which I think you'll agree are all great things in the practice room. So go ahead, trust me on this, set up your automatic transfer in your motivation slash creativity slash focus savings account and pay yourself first. So try this at home this week. Take your pulse and notice if you're over committing yourself.

Starting point is 00:17:25 offer yourself grace and compassion when you catch yourself comparing yourself and redirect your thoughts to introspection focus on your inner experience when you're playing give yourself plenty of time to prepare and pay yourself first in the practice room and here are some questions to increase your awareness how can i make choices that benefit me right now and support me long-term? How can I honor both my commitments and myself today? How can I become more connected to my internal joy and creativity in the practice room? So that's what I have for you this week. Get in touch and let me know how this works for you. Also, don't forget that you can download transcript of this episode also by going

Starting point is 00:18:20 to mindoverfinger.com slash resources. And I have the link in the show notes for you. All right. Much love going your way, my friend. And à bientôt. And there you have it. Thank you so much for spending this time with me today. If you enjoyed this episode, I'd love it if you'd share with your friends and colleagues. Take a screenshot, post it on social media and tag me. I'm mind over finger everywhere. I always love hearing your favorite takeaways. And if you're ready to take your playing career to the next level,

Starting point is 00:19:00 I'd love to invite you to join the Music Mastery Experience. This is my signature group coaching program where we're going to dive deep into building your confidence and mastery and set you up for success and fulfillment in your life and career. You can find all the details at mindoverfinger.com. While you're there, check out the free downloads and online courses available to support your journey even further. And don't forget to subscribe to my newsletter

Starting point is 00:19:31 so you never miss an update or a tool to help you thrive. Again, thank you for being here. Until next time, much love and à bientôt. © transcript Emily Beynon

The Mind Over Finger Podcast - 235 Sustainable Progress – 5 Practice Shifts That Prevent Burnout and Boost Results

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