The Mindset Mentor - 3 Questions to Reprogram Yourself

Episode Date: August 7, 2020

From 0-7 years old we are programmed by what we are taught and what we see. The problem with that is that sometimes we are carrying around beliefs that are not ours. In this episode, I will teach you how to reprogram yourself in real time with 3 important questions.Follow me on Instagram @RobDialJr https://www.instagram.com/robdialjr/ Want to learn more about Mindset Mentor+? For nearly nine years, the Mindset Mentor Podcast has guided you through life's ups and downs. Now, you can dive even deeper with Mindset Mentor Plus. Turn every podcast lesson into real-world results with detailed worksheets, journaling prompts, and a supportive community of like-minded people. Enjoy monthly live Q&A sessions with me, and all this for less than a dollar a day. If you’re committed to real, lasting change, this is for you.Join here 👉 www.mindsetmentor.com My first book that I’ve ever written is now available. It’s called LEVEL UP and It’s a step-by-step guide to go from where you are now, to where you want to be as fast as possible.📚If you want to order yours today, you can just head over to robdial.com/bookHere are some useful links for you… If you want access to a multitude of life advice, self development tips, and exclusive content daily that will help you improve your life, then you can follow me around the web at these links here:Instagram TikTokFacebookYoutube

Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host Rob Dial and if you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another episode. Today we're going to be talking about how to reprogram your mind and I'm going to give you three key questions that you can ask yourself in the moment that you notice yourself getting stuck so that you can get past anything that you feel stuck on and also reprogram your mind in the process. So, you know, the thing that we have to first talk about is that we are all programmed. And, you know, it's not like somebody goes, you know what, I'm going to take my child and I'm going to program in them exactly what I want from them.

Because what happens is you have to realize from zero to seven years old, we are basically sponges. That's why children learn so fast is because our brainwaves are mostly in a place called theta state. You know, there's alpha, delta, gamma, beta, and then theta state. Theta state is basically like hypnosis. And so what happens is, of course, our parents teach us. That is for sure. Our parents teach us certain things, how to treat people, maybe religion, their beliefs. They teach us. But then another thing that's very important is we also see everything that's happening. And we actually take in more of the world and how we're supposed to be

by just watching the world around us. Not by our parents sitting us down and saying this, this, this, this, this, but by us watching our parents, the good and the bad that they do and going, oh, this is how the world works. So we're actually socialized by our parents telling us, but then also by seeing what our parents do, by seeing what our friends do, by seeing what our aunts and uncles and brothers and sisters and everyone around us, what they do. And so that's how we're programmed. We're programmed by what we're told and we're programmed by what we see. And from this, we develop what's called our core beliefs. And I'm going to dive into the core beliefs in just a little while. But the problem with that of developing

core beliefs is this. We get to a point sometimes as we get older and we wonder why we're at ends with ourselves. Like we really want this one thing, but we feel completely different about it. Or, you know, maybe we really want to be into the religion that our parents taught us, but it just doesn't feel right. And you feel like there's almost two sides of you in a battle. Have you ever felt this way where you're sitting there and you're like, I feel this way, but I think this way and I don't know what's right. And you feel at ends with yourself, but also at the same time, you feel kind of weird in your own skin of like, who am I? What do I believe? I know what I've been taught, but I don't know if this is actually truly what I believe in. And at this point in time is where you kind of have to go back and break down everything that's

been taught to you and everything that you've seen since you've been younger. And a lot of times what happens is we realize, well, let me be honest with you. Most people don't even realize this, but at some point, hopefully you realize this is that you're basically carrying baggage in beliefs that aren't even yours. And they've been dropped down to you by your parents. You know, it could be beliefs around money where your parents are just extremely scarce and they have a scarcity mindset and the poverty mindset. And you might get older and you might have that exact same mindset, but it's like this weight, this baggage, it's like carrying around this 50 pound backpack in your life that you just feel like you need to drop. And so we're carrying around other people's baggage, other people's problems. You know, there's so many

different ones that I'm going to cover throughout this episode, but we're basically living somebody else's life. And a lot of parents don't realize that they raise their children to live the life that they want to. And we've all seen it. We've all seen parents that want their children to go into sports because they were never good at sports. So they want their parents to become a doctor because, you know, they want them to be rich and successful because they were never able to be rich and successful. And a lot of parents, not a lot, some parents live vicariously through their children. But one thing that I think everybody wakes up to at one point in time

is the feeling of living somebody else's life. Like the life that you're living, you're like, why am I doing this? Is this truly the life that I want? Is this truly what I want to be doing with myself? You know, and a lot of times parents are telling, I get so many messages from people of parents trying to live their children's life. They're telling them, you know, to go to college. When they go to college, they're telling them what career to get and what to study. They're telling them what job to get. They're telling them who to marry, when to marry. You better have kids really quickly because I'm not getting any younger here. And what happens is we're basically either living the lives sometimes that our parents want us to live or living the lives that society tells us that we should live.

Like for instance, we might be living a life where we spent all of our time in school. We went and got a career that we didn't even truly want, but we went that way because of the fact that we knew we could make more money. And so you go to school sometimes and get a career and go to school and actually study something that you might not even be interested in. But the only reason why you're doing is because of money and money's not fulfilling. And so you're actually not following your true passions. You're following whatever you think you're supposed to do to make money or what society thinks that you should do versus doing what

truly lights you up, what truly what you want to do in your life. And it comes down to us figuring out what our core beliefs are, the core beliefs that have been taught to us, examining them, seeing if they're the actual core beliefs that we want to hold on to, and if not, getting rid of them and then replacing them with new core beliefs. And we get our core beliefs from everywhere. We get them from our parents. We get them from our teachers. We get them from our family. We get them from our religions. And sometimes we just feel like these beliefs don't really line up with me. And to be honest with you, most people get to the point where they don't even know that the core beliefs are holding them back.

They just don't feel right. They just don't feel good. And one of the issues that psychologists have found is that about 70 to 80% of somebody's programmed core beliefs in themselves are actually negative. This is important to talk about. And this is important to think about. 70% to 80% of our core beliefs that are programmed into us by our parents, by society, by religion, are negative core beliefs. Things like, I don't deserve love. I'm not good enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm

not pretty enough. I'll never be in great shape. I'm not a great athlete. I'm not smart. People cannot be trusted. I'll never amount to anything. I'm worthless. Don't trust people of this color. There's a bunch of different things that are programmed into us from childhood and 70 to 80% of them are negative. And so people go through their lives wondering like, why am I so negative? Why do I feel this way? Why do I not feel happy? And they don't realize that since childhood, unbeknownst to them and probably to even their parents as well, that they've programmed negativity into them and they don't know how to get rid of it. And so they, they, they learn this as a child. We learn this as a child. And after we get out of childhood,

we kind of keep them with us. And so, you know, like we said, from zero to seven years old, you're basically like a sponge. Like you're doing whatever it is that you think they're supposed to be doing. Like you're living someone else's life and you're learning and learning and learning. This is the way I'm supposed to do it. My parents taught me this. I'm seeing my parents do this. I'm seeing my aunts and uncles do this. I'm hearing them tell me these things. These are older people. I'm supposed to trust them. And so, you know, we take those on. And so a lot of times people could have an abusive parent, for instance, and they don't think what's wrong with that parent. They think what's wrong with me. And it doesn't have to be physically abusive. It could be mentally abusive. It could

be sexually abusive. There's a lot of different types of abuse that are out there. And people never think what's wrong with that parent. When you're a child, you don't think what's wrong with my parents when you're five years old. You think something's wrong with me. So what's wrong with me? you think something's wrong with me. So what's wrong with me? And we grow up that way. We get older and we still think something's wrong with me. Something's wrong with me. Hey everybody, real quick. Skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of inspiring classes for creative and curious people like you to explore new skills, deepen existing passions, and get lost in creativity. Skillshare offers creative classes designed for real life and all of the circumstances that come with it.

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thousands of classes at skillshare.com slash mindset. All right, let's get back to the show right now. You know, if your mother, for instance, is anxious, she's a really big worrier. Maybe she'll learn it from your grandma or her grandma or her mother.. She's a really big worrier. Maybe she'll learn it from your grandma, her grandma or her mother, your grandma is a really big worrier. And so she's literally basically passed her worry and anxiety onto your mom. So now it's both of them are worrying and anxious. And then something bad happens in the world. And what happens? Your grandma calls your mom, your mom and her talk about it. And then what does your mom do? She calls you. I know there's a lot of people that are out there listening to this and watching this that are like, oh my God, that's my

mom. She calls me anytime something bad happens. She's always watching the news. Her and my grandma are always talking about these bad things. And so what happens is the child grows up scared because the parent is so scared. It's not because the world is dangerous. It's because the parent views the child, views the world is dangerous and passes that on to the child. And a lot of times what happens is a parent like that will be in fear and be in fear and be in fear. And the child learns to be in fear. The child learns the world is dangerous. There's so many people that I've had conversations with that have parents like this, and they're anxious all of the time. They worry all of the time.

They're constantly stressed out, and they have no idea why they can't get past this. And the reason why they can't get past it is because it's programmed into them. And then their mom calls them up and says, hey, did you hear what just happened in this country? Did you hear about what happened in the election? You hear about this person bickering with this person? You know, in our state, somebody was murdered, even though they're nowhere near you. They call you and tell you all these things. And what happens is they say, honey, I'm only calling you and telling you this because

I love you. And I want you to realize this, that is not love. It's their worry and anxiety disguised as love, but they don't even know the difference. And the reason why is because their relationship with their parents are that way. And so what happens is we kind of learn through our parents. And if we don't sit down and go, is this me? Is this what I believe in? We carry it with us as much as they carry it with them as well. So, you know, what happens is you learn this from childhood, you get older. And if you're not aware of the programming, you never step out of yourself and say, hey, is this what I truly want to believe? You're going to get the exact same thing that they had. And it goes over and over and over.

It's just a pattern. It's just a pattern that's developed that we can learn how to break. And in order to do that, you got to take yourself out of the jar. If you've ever listened to me before, I always say, when you're in the jar, you can't read the label. So what does that mean? When you're living your every single day, your day-to-day life, you're just in the jar. But eventually you need to sit down and take yourself outside of the jar so you can look at the jar and look at the label and say, hmm, yeah, I am living a lot of my life in stress and a lot of my life in anxiety and a lot of my life in X, Y, Z. Is that the way I want to be forever or do I need to change Is that the way I want to be forever, or do I need to change it? Okay, I want to change it. How do I need to change it? And we need to

plan ourselves out as if we're a business, as if we're creating a business plan. And before I give you these three questions that I want you to kind of think of and write down and work through, I want you to really understand that all of our core beliefs, so the majority of our core beliefs are passed down consciously from our parents or even unconsciously. And what I want you to do is start thinking about those core beliefs. Think about if that's actually who you truly are. And if it's not, I want you to plan out how to get past them. And so these are the three questions talking about how to reprogram your mind and how to reprogram yourself. So now that you know how you get these, now you know why they exist. Now we can work out how to get through them. And this is how you get through

them. Question number one is where did I learn this, right? Where did I learn this? So if you're anxious, do you have a lot of anxiety? If you have a lot of stress, ask yourself, where did I learn this? And just see if maybe you happen to pick it up from a parent. Maybe you picked it up from an aunt. Maybe you picked it up from a teacher when you were in kindergarten. Who knows? Where did I learn this is the first question. Because you either learned it by it being taught to you,

or you learned it by actually seeing it and viewing it. So where did you learn it? That's the first question. Question number two is what is my truth? What is my truth? Right? So if, for instance, you have a mother that's really worried and anxious and think the world's a terrible place, and you've been maybe consciously or unconsciously programmed to feel that the world is unsafe as well. And you now know, okay, where did that come from? It came from my mom. Okay. What is my truth? My truth is, man, I've had a great life. I've never been, you know, murdered to this point. I've never been robbed. Are there things that are happening in the world that are crazy? Yeah,

but that's always happening. We have 7.5 billion people. There's going to be some crazy ones out there. Of course. So what is my truth? I think the world's pretty amazing. I think that people are more good than they are bad. So do I want to hold on to that? Maybe not. And then so the third question is, what do I choose to believe? What do I choose to believe? I choose to believe that people are inherently good and the world is mostly a safe place. How's that feel? That feels pretty good. Okay, now we can start to make a plan of how we're going to get past this, how we're going to reprogram ourselves. Next time I notice myself getting stressed and anxious, I'm going to sit there and go, okay, hold on. Is this my truth? It's not. I'm just, this is and anxious, I'm going to sit there and go, okay, hold on.

Is this my truth? It's not. I'm just, this is a program. I'm running a program just like a computer. You put something in the floppy drive, you know, the floppy drive, it's going to run the program that you put in the floppy drive. This is for all of you older people, like the floppy drive. Some of you young kids are like, what the hell is a floppy drive, right?

So you put in the CD, it's going to play the music, right? Some of you young kids are like, what the hell is a CD? So you put in the CD, it's going to play that music that's on the CD. Same thing. You put in the program, it's going to run the program. Doesn't mean that you can't stop the program. You can't stop the CD from playing that music. So you start to feel stressed.

You start to feel anxious and you go, is this my truth? It's not. Okay. What do I choose to believe? I choose to believe that the world is safe. Okay. What is my plan to continue to start feeling this, continue to feel this way? I'm going to tell myself the world is safe. And I'm going to think of five different times where I felt loved and supported by other people who maybe I didn't even know that helped me out in a rut. Maybe my car was broken down on the side of the road and somebody

pulled over to the side of the road and they could have taken advantage of me. They could have thrown me in the back of their car and murdered me. But instead, they decided to help me change my tire. They decided to help me, you know, put oil inside of my tank, whatever it is. So then what you do is you start to reprogram yourself by stopping yourself in the middle of the program and flipping the program. This isn't my truth. This is my mom's truth. I'm going to let it go. I choose not to believe this anymore. Let's say you're sitting there and you're like, okay, I'm looking in the mirror and I'm like, oh God, you're so, you're so ugly. You don't look good. You're so overweight,

you know, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And you start talking down to yourself. You get out of the jar, you start reading the label and you go, where did I learn this? Well, I learned this because when I was a little kid, I used to be a little bit chubby. My dad used to always pinch my sides, my little fat on my sides and talk about how I was chubby. I used to get made fun of as a kid when I was chubby. And you can think about the times when you learned this from other people, right? Because if you were in the middle of the jungle and all of that, people aren't going to call you fat if you're in a tribe in the jungle, you know? So it's something that's,

it's like people throwing their stuff at you and you're just carrying their baggage, okay? So that's where I learned it. What is my truth? My truth is I actually want to love my body. I love my body. I think that it looks good. We know so many people that are just in great shape.

They still think they're fat. And the reason why is because they're still running old programs of things that they learned. So what is my truth? My truth is I'm in pretty good shape. My truth is I take really good care of my body. I work out four times a week. Okay. What do I choose to believe? I choose to believe that I have an incredible body, that I'm building an even better body, that I'm working every single day. I'm working hard to get stronger and to be healthier and happier and have more energy. And so next time you catch yourself in those little patterns over and over and over again, you stop yourself right in the middle of them. And then you flip the switch and you say, what do I choose to believe? What is my truth?

And what do I choose to believe? And this is how you reprogram yourself. You reprogram yourself by doing it over and over and over and over again. The way that you program yourself is by doing something over and over and over again. So you've learned your program through repetition for years and years and years, 10, 15, 20, 30 years, 40 years maybe of repetition. Well, it's going to take some time and some more repetition to unprogram whatever it is that's inside of you and then reprogram it to something different. So it's not going to change overnight, but now you have the awareness and the plan to get yourself

out of whatever it is. So now you can start working at it. And, you know, it could be around religion. It could be around your body. It could be around money. It could be around relationships. It could be around your career. It could be around your family. The important thing is that you use these three questions to number one, make yourself self-aware of what's going on. To number two, find the pattern. To number three, change the pattern. And number four, make a plan to continue to work past that pattern. So that's what I got for you for today. If you love this episode, please share it with someone that you know. And I have an amazing announcement coming up. Just so you guys know, I have a new course that's going to be

launching on how to create the life that you want through the law of attraction, through meditation, through visualization. It's going to be the most incredible thing that I've ever made. It is not out yet, but it will be coming out very soon. So if you're out there and you're interested, just keep an ear out. Continue to listen to every single episode because I'm going to be announcing it very soon. And for those of you guys that want to text me and get motivational text messages from me, go ahead and send me a text right now. My number is 512-580-9305. Once again, 512-580-9305. Send me a text message right now. Join my motivational group. I send videos, I send text messages, and it's just another way to get a little bit of inspiration throughout the day.

But with that, I'm going to leave the same way I leave you every single episode, making sure you make someone else's day better. I appreciate you. Go out there and be the change that you want to see in the world. And I'll see you on the next episode.