The Mindset Mentor - Are You in Control of Your Life?

Episode Date: April 27, 2020

How intentional are you with your life? Most people don't realize that the majority of their day is spent in reaction mode, simply just putting out fires. In this episode, I am going to teach you how to be more intentional and in control of your life.Follow me on Instagram @RobDialJr https://www.instagram.com/robdialjr/ Want to learn more about Mindset Mentor+? For nearly nine years, the Mindset Mentor Podcast has guided you through life's ups and downs. Now, you can dive even deeper with Mindset Mentor Plus. Turn every podcast lesson into real-world results with detailed worksheets, journaling prompts, and a supportive community of like-minded people. Enjoy monthly live Q&A sessions with me, and all this for less than a dollar a day. If you’re committed to real, lasting change, this is for you.Join here 👉 www.mindsetmentor.com My first book that I’ve ever written is now available. It’s called LEVEL UP and It’s a step-by-step guide to go from where you are now, to where you want to be as fast as possible.📚If you want to order yours today, you can just head over to robdial.com/bookHere are some useful links for you… If you want access to a multitude of life advice, self development tips, and exclusive content daily that will help you improve your life, then you can follow me around the web at these links here:Instagram TikTokFacebookYoutube

Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dyle, and if you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never, ever miss another episode. Today, we're going to be talking about watering plants. And obviously, we're not going to talk just about watering plants, but there is a metaphor to what I'm going to be talking about. And I want you to think about this. And I may have talked about this about a year or so ago, but I want you to just think about this. And I want you to think about you're standing in front of two different potted plants, right? You can't really see anything. All you can just see is you can just see the soil and that's it. And one of them is labeled positivity.

And the other one that's on the left, let's say that one's on the right. And the one that's it. And one of them is labeled positivity. And the other one that's on the left, let's say that one's on the right. And the one that's on the left is negativity. That's what it's labeled, right? And you have a pot of water. You have a jug of water. Now, if you're looking at that and you're saying, okay, we got positivity over here. We got negativity over here. Which one would you prefer to water? Now, if you're listening to this podcast, you probably prefer, you're the type of person, you drink the same Kool-Aid I drink, we drink the Kool-Aid together. We're the positive people.

We're the ones that try to be positive at least, right? You're going to water the positive one. Let me ask you this question though. Throughout the day, are you actually watering the positive or are you watering the negative in your life? Are you pouring a little bit of positive and every once in a while you're like, oh, putting a little bit of the negative in there. You're pouring a little bit of the positive and you're like, oh, put a little bit of the negative in there. Because obviously we want to water the positive. But how often do you water the negative? Are you just listening and trying to brainwash yourself so that you can be more positive? Well, this is what I want you to think of.

Whatever you water, if it's a plant, it will grow. That's exactly the truth. Like there is nothing else. If one of them doesn't get water, that plant will die. It will not grow. There will be no plant that comes from those seeds. plant will die. It will not grow. There will be no plant that comes from those seeds. So if you don't water the negativity, you won't get any negativity. But if you water it,

guess what you're going to get? You're going to get a lot of it. You're going to get a lot of negativity. And if you want to get positivity, you need to pour the water in there. So what is the water? The water is your energy. I think one of the most underrated things that I rarely hear people talk about is energy, the energy that they have throughout the day, because energy is not really a renewable resource. I mean, we can, you know, drink something with caffeine in it and try to get more energy. But essentially, if you're like me, there's a certain time of the day where if you're working and working and working, you're going to click off. You're going to be like, I'm done. I don't, I don't have any more energy, right? Energy, unless you want to take a nap, unless you, you know, and if you want to say that you can get energy from food, you really can't actually digestion of food actually takes

away energy. But if you're thinking about it this way, you have a negativity pot, you have a positivity pot and you have the water, which is your energy. Where you put your energy is what you will get. Where energy goes and where energy is focused, that's what you're going to get. So if you notice throughout the day, you're like, man, I really, I listened to this podcast. I read the right books, but I still find myself going to the negative spot. Now that's not necessarily terrible because now you're self-aware that you're doing this, but you have to think about all of the things that come into your awareness throughout the day. Think about the people that you hang out with, right? They say that you're the average of the five people that you spend the most time with. My girlfriend

and I were talking actually yesterday, we were having a conversation and we were just sitting on the porch. We're looking at the view, watching the sunset. And we're talking about people that we know that, you know, we were having a conversation with them about working out. And they were like, Rob, how do you get motivated to work out? Yes, I do have friends that literally ask me questions like this. It's not a joke. I talk to my friends the same way. Like they ask me the same questions.

So like, how do you get motivated to work out? Because I just got done with the workout. You know, I worked out, you know, literally I did the seven day challenge where all of us worked out for seven days in a row. And I was telling them the ways that I get motivated to work out and how I motivate myself. And, you know, I appreciate my body and I love my body. So I want to take care of it. And anything that you love and appreciate, you'll take care of. But if you don't love and appreciate your body, you're not going to want to take care of it. That's a whole other episode. Don't want to go down that way, but I'll just tell you. Then we started having a conversation of why don't you

think, why do you think that they don't work out? And what my girlfriend said was they're not surrounded by other people who work out. Their significant others don't really work out. Their friends don't really work out. And we kind of have our own bubble of people that we talk to that work out, that are fit, that eat healthy. And they don't really have that. I was like, that's interesting because, you know, literally you just said what I've always said in the quote that I've heard for such a long time, which is the five people that you spend the most time with is who you'll become. If you hang out with five really fit friends, you're probably going to become the sixth. If you hang out with five really overweight friends, you're probably going to

become the sixth. If you hang out with five millionaires, you'll probably become the sixth. If you hang out with five alcoholics, you'll probably become the sixth. If you hang out with five alcoholics, you'll probably become the sixth. So the people that you hang out with, would you say that they're watering your negative pot or they're watering your positive pot? The things that you read, are you reading books that are adding to your positivity or are you reading stuff like the tabloids and all the stuff that's happening and the negativity and the gossip and all of that. Are you negative or watering the negative or are you watering the positive? How about the shows that you watch? This is one thing that really I don't think people think about

enough. The shows that they watch. There's a lot of shows that are terrible, crappy shows, and people are just like, yeah, but it allows me just to zone out. You have to realize that those things, everything that you see, do, hear, watch is implementing thoughts into your brain. So what are you watching? If you're watching a reality shows, there's probably going to be, I mean, I've seen them. There's a lot of yelling and screaming and negativity and talking behind people's back and backstabbing and all that stuff. Like that's, that's not the life that I want to live. And it's probably not the life that you want to live as well. So why would you watch something when it's not the life that you want to live? The music that you listen to. This is big for me because I love all types of music, but I've actually stopped listening to certain types of

music because when I realized that when you sing to a song, you are actually affirming something into your reality. So what are you listening to and how are you actually, literally, how is your body and your mind responding to the music that you listen to? So the people you hang out with, the things that you read, the shows that you watch, the music that you listen to, what it's really about is your energy and it's about intention. what it's really about is your energy and it's about intention. One of the things that I've really started to learn about that I realized I didn't really take as sacred as I should was my intentions. And, you know, as you guys know, and I've spoken

about, I've done quite a few plant medicine ceremonies and different types of, you know, like ayahuasca and mushrooms and, uh, watch Uma and MDMA and all of these different types of, you know, like ayahuasca and mushrooms and wachuma and MDMA and all of these different plant medicine ceremonies. And one of the things that they're very big on is your intention going into every single session. What is your intention? What do you want to get out of it? And then you realize that everything that you do should involve intention. You know, are you intentional about when you wake up or are you just waking up, you know, right before your alarm clock goes off? Are you intentional about trying to grow in the morning or having that time to meditate or just to be silent or just to enjoy a cup of coffee before the kids wake up or to read a book? Are you being intentional about your book? Are you being intentional

about your morning? Are you being intentional about the people that you surround yourself with? Are you being intentional about the things that you read? Are you being intentional about the shows that you watch? Are you being intentional about what you listen to? Are you being intentional with every aspect of your life? I'll be honest with you. For a very, very long time, I was being, And I'll be honest with you for a very, very long time. I was being, I was not being intentional. I was being reactive. You know, I was waking up and it was about, you know, about a year before I started this podcast. It's probably about 2014. I woke up one day and I was like, what am I doing with my life? Like, there's literally no intention. I'm just waking up right before I'm supposed to go to work. I'm taking a real quick shower. I'm grabbing coffee. I'm grabbing some breakfast tacos and a drive-thru on the way to work. And I was just

like, I'm slowly dying is what I feel like. I don't feel like what I'm doing is making me alive. And I was like, you know what? I'm going to start waking up earlier, even though I'm still going to this job that I absolutely hate that's soul-sucking. I'm going to wake up and I'm going to have me time where I'm focusing on myself, on my growth, on my life, on making positive changes. Cause people can look at me now and they could be like, oh yeah, well it's, you know, it's been an easy, I would definitely, it'd be a lot easier to be intentional. I had his life, but you have to realize you can't be intentional from where a certain person is who might be in a position that you might want to be in. You have to be

intentional from where you are, no matter where you are right now. And if you're in a position you don't want to be in, you need to be more intentional than you ever have been. So I thought to myself, okay, I'm going to wake up an hour early. And what I'm going to do is instead of waking up right before my alarm clock goes off, I'm going to wake up and I'm going to do a morning routine. I'm going to meditate, I'm going to read, and I'm going to journal. And I noticed the interesting thing was that I felt better every single day that I did that. And when I missed it, it was like my day was completely off kilter. And you guys who have a morning routine or who have started a morning routine before,

you know when you don't have a morning routine, when you get off of it, it's like your whole world is just not in the right place. And the reason why is because you started your day off with intention based off of what you wanted to get out of the day. And so you have to be intentional about every single thing that you do, the people that you talk to, the conversations that you have, the way that you drive to work, the food that you eat, when you work out, how you work out, literally every single aspect, the books that you read to your children, every single thing you need to be intentional about. Hold everything sacred. It's the difference between being proactive, which is being intentional and being reactive,

and realize that where your energy goes in your life is what you will get out of it. If you show me your habits and the things that you consistently do every single day, I can show you where your life will be in 10 years. Now you don't need me for that. You have yourself. So why don't you sit and go, okay, if I were to do what I'm doing right now, every single day, where would I be in 10 years? What would my life look like? Because I'm going to promise you this, you know, out of all of the people listening to this, hopefully all of us are going to be alive in 10 years. Most of us will. And if we are alive in 10 years, don't we want that life that we have to be the best that it possibly could be? But here's

the thing. And this is what I've been saying to a lot of people recently. If you don't change, nothing around you will change. And so the two things I want you to focus on over the next week, even just think about it today. Where am I putting my energy throughout the day? Am I watering the positive plant or am I watering the negative plant? Because whichever one you water will grow. And if you don't water one of them, it will die. So hopefully you're going to be watering the positive one and not the negative one.

So the energy start focusing on what you're putting energy to in the intention behind every single thing that you do. And the intention has to do with the energy, obviously that you bring to it, the people that you hang out with. Are they supporting you on the path that you're going on? Or are they somebody who doesn't really line up with your future? And if they don't, it's okay. Not everybody is meant to be in your life forever. So, you know, I'm not saying you have to get rid of anybody, but can you spend time with some of the people that literally feel like you're watering your negative pot? The things that you read, what are you reading? How much are you reading? What are you putting into your mind? The shows that you watch, the music that you listen to,

the people that you, like every single thing, every single aspect of your life requires energy and intention. And if you don't focus on it, you're still putting your energy into something. But is it the thing that you want your energy to be into? So that's what I want you to think about today. If you have a pen and paper, grab it and ask yourself throughout the day, how much time am I spending watering negativity? And how much time am I spending watering positivity? And the next question I ask yourself is how can I stop watering the negativity as much? And how can I start watering the positivity? And then how can I be more intentional in every single thing that I do? So that's what I got for you for today's episode.

If you love this episode, please share it with someone that you know and love. And if you guys would do me a favor, share it on your Instagram. We have so many people that have been sharing. We have hundreds and hundreds of people that have been sharing over the past few weeks. I definitely, absolutely, 100% appreciate it. So if you've ever gotten any value from anything I've said, please share this on your Instagram, whether it's a video, whether it's a picture, whether it's a screenshot, and tag me in it, RobDialJr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L. And I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single episode.

Make it your mission to make someone else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.