The Mindset Mentor - Break Your Unconscious Limiting Beliefs

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button since you never miss another podcast episode. And if you love this podcast, you'll probably also love my video lesson on how to improve your journaling skills so that you can improve yourself. So if you want that, go to mindsetmentorjournal.com right now. Once again, mindsetmentorjournal.com. It is absolutely free video lesson and I will also give you 30 free journaling prompts so that you can start to work on yourself and improve yourself over the next month. Today, we're going to be talking about how we accidentally, subconsciously hold ourselves back and create limiting beliefs. And I want you to realize that everybody has a glass ceiling. Where you are right now is probably at the maximum of your glass

Starting point is 00:00:53 ceiling. And a couple of days ago, I saw a photo and it was a horse, you know, horses a couple thousand pounds, right? And it was tied to a white plastic chair. And it was just standing there being tied to a white plastic chair that maybe weighs was just standing there being tied to a white plastic chair that maybe weighs what, two pounds. It could easily just walk and pull the chair with it. But because of the fact that it had been trained for its entire life, that when the rope is on, it can't go past the rope. It can't pull any chairs. It can't pull, you know, away from something. It just never even tried to walk away. And it reminds me of a story. It's a good thing. It's not a true story, but it kind of gives you an idea. You know, there's a man that's walking through a forest and he sees a whole

Starting point is 00:01:29 bunch of elephants. And these elephants, there's an elephant trainer and the elephants are there. And he sees these huge elephants, five, 10,000 pound elephants, whatever they might be. They're probably even more than that, right? Huge elephants. And they have these little teeny tiny ropes that are tied to a small tree. And the elephant could easily just walk away and with minimal effort, probably break the tree in half or break the rope in half. And so this man sees these elephants and he thinks to himself, this is kind of weird. Like, why is it like this? So he walks in and goes past, you know, gets out of the forest, goes to this elephant trainer. He starts talking to him and he's confused.

Starting point is 00:02:05 How do these giant animals, how are they being held in place by such a small rope and a small tree? And what happened was when they were younger, they were tied to a tree and they tried to get away and they tried to get away and they tried to get away and then they couldn't. And they tried to get away and they tried to get away and they tried to get away and they couldn't. And they were conditioned to believe that they cannot break free. And so as they got bigger, they didn't need a bigger rope. They just needed the same rope.

Starting point is 00:02:34 They were never aware of how much larger they grew and how much more powerful they were. And they never tried to break free. They one day realized that they were powerless and they just gave up for the rest of their lives. Now, it's a sad story. That does happen with many animals and that's how many animals are trained where they try to get away when they're younger and it's just conditioned into them that they cannot get away. And so because their mind thinks they cannot get away as they grow, as they mature, as they get bigger, as they get more powerful, they don't even try. And so they just give up for the rest of their lives. Why do I share that story? Because I'm curious with you, was there one day,

Starting point is 00:03:16 one moment or one event in your life where you just gave up? Think about that for a second. Some of you are listening, you're 20 years old. Some of you are listening, you're 40, 50, 60 years old. Is there a moment in your life that you can think of that you can remember where you just consciously or unconsciously, most likely it was unconsciously, just decided, eh, I'm going to give up? Was there something that happened to you? Was there a negative person that you were around? Was it your parents said something to you? Was it that you got your heart broken? Was it that you put all of your effort into becoming great at something, maybe a sport or maybe studying and trying to get a degree? And then you put all of your effort into it and failed and you just realized,

Starting point is 00:04:02 yeah, I'm done trying. Was there a moment when you gave up? How long have you been stuck in your current comfort zone? Think about that for a second. How long have you been stuck in your current comfort zone? When I'm on a lot of lives, I like to ask this question because it really makes people start to look at themselves from an outsider's perspective and say, huh, how long have I been here? And more than anything else, people, I see it in the comments whenever I do lives or people say it when I'm in face, you know, face to face in front of them. They're like five years, 10 years, 20 years, 40 years, I've been in stuck in my comfort zone. And I'm like, you gave up one day. Well, now that you know that you're in your comfort zone and you're in that

Starting point is 00:04:40 place, you've been there for a long time. Are you going to be there until you die? in that place, you've been there for a long time, are you going to be there until you die? Because many of us are holding ourselves back because we failed at something in the past. We're holding ourselves back because of something that somebody told us one time in our past. We're holding ourselves back because it's just easier not to try than it is to feel like a failure. Right? Can you relate to that? It's easier not to try than it is to feel like a failure. Can you relate to that? It's easier not to try than it is to feel like a failure. It's easier not to go for something than have all of our insecurities thrown in our face. How many of us are holding ourselves back because of something that we failed in the past? How many of us are holding ourselves back because where we came from? Oh, where I come from, everyone's poor.

Starting point is 00:05:23 Oh, where I come from, nobody does anything with their lives. Where I come from, everyone's poor. Oh, where I come from, nobody does anything with their lives. Where I come from, everyone's a fuck up. Everyone's a drug addict, right? How many of us are holding ourselves back because of the people that we surround ourselves with? How many people are holding ourselves back because a belief that was programmed into us at a young age? And it wasn't even necessarily, when I say it was programmed into us, it doesn't mean like there's like an evil Lord that's like sitting over and they're like, I'm going to program this child and I'm going to make them do what I want. Like that's not really what happened. It's not that evil way of thinking or programmed, but really what it comes down to is we just learn by hearing

Starting point is 00:05:58 other people talk, by viewing what other people do, what life is supposed to be like and who we're supposed to be as an adult. And you could be like, I don't know if you've ever experienced this, but as you become an adult, you start to see like an uncle or a cousin that you used to look up to. And now that you're older, you're like, they're kind of an idiot, right? Like they're kind of stupid. They kind of don't really have their shit together. And I have my shit together more than them, even though they're 20 years older than me. You know what I'm talking about? What I'm talking about? Those people, like you see them and you're like, I can't believe I used to look up to them.

Starting point is 00:06:28 Well, you know, that's fine. It's all good and dandy. But when you're a kid, you look up to an adult and you see that person's an adult. So what they say to you is like, that's it. It's truth. And we can hear somebody say something and maybe not even consciously remember the moment in our head right now. But we can hear somebody say it when we're four years old, five years old. And because they're an adult and we're children and we look up to them, we just think that must be absolute truth, not knowing that they could be a complete idiot. So think about that for a second. Is there something that you can remember that somebody may have told you one time? Is there a moment in your life where you can

Starting point is 00:07:05 realize that you unconsciously just decided to throw in the towel, that you decided to give up? You know, how many of us are holding ourselves back because of what a parent or a teacher or family member or friend or cousin told us when we were young and really impressionable? told us when we were young and really impressionable, most of us. And we took what they said and it became our truth. And it always reminds me when I think of that, I developed this analogy of a dirty shirt. And I remember years ago, I was watching Queer Eye with my girlfriend at the time, now my wife. And I was watching them and they were working on this woman and working, helping her with her mindset. They were helping her with her house or helping her with dressing. And even when they dressed her up and they got her a makeover and all this stuff, she still thought that she was ugly. And they're like, why do you think you're so ugly? Like,

Starting point is 00:07:56 what is it? She's like, I remember when I was a kid, my aunt told me that I was an ugly kid and I will always be ugly. And I just have always kind of felt that way about myself. And I was like, holy shit, that's crazy. I started talking to my wife about it. I was like, it's like somebody, it's like her aunt gave her a shirt that said, you're ugly. And she put it on when she was six, seven years old. And now she's 40 and she's still wearing that shirt. And now she's 40 and she's still wearing that shirt. Like how many of us are wearing a shirt that somebody else put on us and believing that that shirt is us when in reality, we could just take that shirt off and stop believing it.

Starting point is 00:08:34 Like that shirt has become part of her identity. How many of us had somebody say something directly to us and we went, yes, this is my truth when we were a child and it is still our truth even though we're adults. Think about that for a second. Have you ever had somebody that told you something that you looked up to when you were young? A parent or a leader, teacher, aunt, uncle, cousin, family member, friend, brother or sister that told you something and because you were young and impressionable,

Starting point is 00:09:09 it became your truth. I mean, it's bad enough that we hold ourselves back because of limiting beliefs. But what's even worse is when you realize you're holding yourself back because of somebody else's beliefs. So it might've been, they were talking directly to you and you took that on as your truth. Or it might've been, oh yeah, well, you know, nobody from this family graduates college. So we're a bunch of screw ups or whatever it might be. Or nobody from this family graduates college, so we're a bunch of screw-ups or whatever it might be. Or nobody from this part of town makes any money, so you're going to be poor your whole life. Or nobody that looks like you or looks like us is able to be successful. Nobody with this skin color is able to do X, Y, Z. The many times I hear people that say when they were children, they heard these things and they became their truths. They put on that shirt and they've been wearing that shirt forever.

Starting point is 00:09:48 It's kind of like the example of a goldfish, right? When I used to work, my very first job was I worked at PetSmart. I was a bird and fish specialist. That was my exact title for two years when I was in high school. And we would have these tanks that were probably about three feet wide. I think they're around like 150 gallons, maybe something like that. Not really big, but we'd have hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of goldfish in them. And the goldfish would only get about two inches long, right? They wouldn't get very big. And so people would take their goldfish home and they put them inside of a small tank, you know, 20-gallon tank, and those goldfish would stay only about two to three inches long. But what's crazy about it is they get one to two inches inside of a tank, but if you take that exact same goldfish and you

Starting point is 00:10:35 throw them inside of a pond or you throw them inside of a lake, they can actually grow up to 14 inches. So that means that they can grow seven times the size in the wild when they have space than they can when they're inside of a small tank. Think about that for a second. How does that relate to your life? How many of you are put into a small tank and that small tank is where your mind still is and you can't grow past it because of what you're told when you're younger? How many of us are restricted by our own minds? How many of us are held back by the people that we surround ourselves with and what they say to us? People that are thinking small. Another example of this, and this just shows you many times in nature because we are a

Starting point is 00:11:18 part of nature. So obviously this relates to us as well. It's like the example of if you take a flea. Fleas can jump. I'd have to Google it, but I think it's like a couple stories. Like these little teeny tiny things can jump really, really high. And if you take a bunch of fleas and you put them inside of a jar and you put the top on top of the jar, they'll jump up, they'll hit themselves, they'll jump up, they'll hit themselves a few times. And over the next couple of days, they'll stop jumping as high because they know if they jump high, they're going to hit themselves.

Starting point is 00:11:47 And I don't know if fleas can knock themselves out or not, but they understand pain. They understand if they jump too high, there's pain. And so what happens is if you keep them in for a few days, they go from jumping like 20, 30 feet, whatever it is for fleas, to jumping like six inches because they don't want to hit themselves

Starting point is 00:12:02 on the top of the jar. And then, so what happens is if you take out the fleas, you want, you take them out, you know want to hit themselves in the top of the jar. And then, so what happens is if you take out the fleas, you want, you take them out, you know, you can take off the top and you take them out of the jar. They are now conditioned to not jump higher than those six inches, even though they're completely free. They're not, they're not going to jump higher than those six inches when they could easily jump 10, 20, 30 feet, whatever it is for it. It's a massive amount. I can't remember off the top of my head. But what happens is they're in it for a couple of days. They learn about the jar. They learn about the pain of hitting the jar. And then for the rest of their lives, they don't try to jump

Starting point is 00:12:36 higher. Here's the crazy part about though. You ready? Then when they have offspring, their children, the flea babies, right? So the flea babies will not jump higher than those six inches. So they literally are conditioned through their parents to not, like from just birth, to not jump higher than six inches, even though they have the full capacity to do so. How many of you listening are literally a flea baby that comes from another flea that took their boundaries and their glass ceiling and placed it on top of you. What we need to realize is we need to realize the thing about programming is it's hard to recognize unless you're actually looking at it and looking for it. We've been programmed in so many ways. People telling us stuff directly, us hearing things in

Starting point is 00:13:26 society, us being children and hearing things incorrectly, or not being able to realize what the truth is that's actually happening here. Somebody could be saying something in a joke, you're four years old, you hear somebody saying it to somebody else, and you automatically think that's your truth. So it's also like the part of being a child when you're impressionable, you don't really know the truth from untruth. You just take all of it as truth. And so it's hard to find and recognize your programming unless you're actually out there searching for it, because it's pretty much unnoticeable. It's all subconscious. You know, there's the conscious mind, which is 5% of what your thoughts are. And there's the subconscious. Subconscious means underconscious. It is under the conscious mind, which means it's usually just an automatic thought,

Starting point is 00:14:09 an automatic programming that you don't even think of. It just pops up. And it goes so deep. I'm still finding programmings. And I think that I'll probably still be finding programmings and uncovering aspects of myself for the rest of my life. And I'm okay with that. aspects of myself for the rest of my life. And I'm okay with that. But it's now become like a treasure hunt. Like I'm trying to find these little programmies and work through them instead of being like, oh my God, I wish I didn't have them anymore. I have come to terms, I'll probably have them for the rest of my life. Now I'm just going on a search and trying to find them. And so really what it comes down to is, are you like the elephant? Are you like the goldfish? Are you like the flea? Where

Starting point is 00:14:45 you've been programmed to think smaller, to be smaller, to not think outside of the box, to not be bigger, to not be louder, to not be your full truest expression of yourself. And that's really what you have to start thinking about and start realizing we've all been unconsciously programmed and running unconsciously on these programs. Our job as adults is to find these programs, figure out which ones we want to keep and which ones we want to get rid of, and start programming ourselves the way that we want to. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, if you were like, damn, this shit was good, do me a favor, share this on your Instagram stories and tag me at RobDialJr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. The more of you

Starting point is 00:15:24 guys that share this, the more that people can find this episode, the more that people can find this podcast, and more this podcast can grow and keep changing lives. So if you would share it, I would greatly, greatly appreciate it for it. And with that, I'm going to leave the same way I leave you every episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.

The Mindset Mentor - Break Your Unconscious Limiting Beliefs

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