The Mindset Mentor - Building Courage in The Face of Fear

Episode Date: September 3, 2021

Your fears will never disappear, you just have to become more courageous in the face of those fears. In this episode, I am going to teach you how to become more comfortable with your fears and build the courage to take action anyways. Follow me on IG for more inspiration here: https://www.instagram.com/robdialjr/ If you live in the US/Canada and you want to receive motivational texts from me, text me now at 1-512-580-9305 or click here https://my.community.com/robdial Want to learn more about Mindset Mentor+? For nearly nine years, the Mindset Mentor Podcast has guided you through life's ups and downs. Now, you can dive even deeper with Mindset Mentor Plus. Turn every podcast lesson into real-world results with detailed worksheets, journaling prompts, and a supportive community of like-minded people. Enjoy monthly live Q&A sessions with me, and all this for less than a dollar a day. If you’re committed to real, lasting change, this is for you.Join here 👉 www.mindsetmentor.com My first book that I’ve ever written is now available. It’s called LEVEL UP and It’s a step-by-step guide to go from where you are now, to where you want to be as fast as possible.📚If you want to order yours today, you can just head over to robdial.com/bookHere are some useful links for you… If you want access to a multitude of life advice, self development tips, and exclusive content daily that will help you improve your life, then you can follow me around the web at these links here:Instagram TikTokFacebookYoutube

Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you've never given us a rating or review on iTunes or Apple Podcasts, please do me a favor. If you love this, give us a rating or review. The more positive reviews that we get, the more that we spike up iTunes algorithm and the more people that can find this podcast. Today, we're going to talk about how to stop focusing on your fear so that you can actually start getting stuff done and move into the direction that you want. And I've got a really great story around this. So this past weekend, I was at an event that

I am a mastermind that I'm a part of. And there's about 80 of us in this mastermind. And the speaker who was on stage was Mike Tyson this weekend. And it was cool to see Mike Tyson talk because one of the questions that was asked of him is somebody said, Hey, Mike, when you were about to go into the ring and fight some of these people, we're talking about Mike Tyson fought some of the most dangerous people alive. And the guy said, hey, you know, you fought some of those dangerous people that have ever existed. Did you ever feel fear when you were about to walk into the ring? Mike Tyson was super honest. And he said, I am literally a terrified person, like my entire life. I'm afraid all the time. And he said, when I would find out, before I would find out who I was about to fight, I'd be terrified of who that could

possibly be. As soon as I would find out who the person was that I was fighting, I would be terrified to fight that person. For the six months, up until the point where I stepped in the ring and I was training every day, every night, every day, every night. The whole time I was training, I was terrified just thinking about this person and what we were going to do in the ring. Almost every night I had trouble sleeping because I was so afraid of this person who I was going to step in the ring with. I was terrified the night of the fight. I was terrified walking in to the ring.

And the only time that I wasn't terrified is as soon as the guy said, okay, fight. I was terrified walking in to the ring. And the only time that I wasn't terrified is as soon as the guy said, okay, fight. And that point in time, I just kind of went on to autopilot. And it was cool to see because what he said was super important. He said, I felt fear all the time, but the one thing that I didn't do was doubt myself. Let me say that again. He said, I felt fear all of the time, but the one thing that I didn't do was doubt myself. Let me say that again. He said, I felt fear all of the time, but the one thing that I didn't do was doubt myself. And the reason why I didn't doubt myself was because I know that there are very few people in this world who put more action into becoming the greatest they could possibly be than myself. My level of preparation was beyond what other people would put into it.

And you start to think about that and you realize this is a guy whose job was to go in and fight and try to knock people out while they were trying to knock him out. He felt fear his entire career. And then you think about the fact that we feel fear all the time. And we think that there's something wrong with that.

We think that that fear is bad. And then because of the fear, we don't do what it is that we're supposed to do. And it holds us back from taking the action that we need to, but it also holds us back from, if we don't take the action, it holds us back from not having the life that we truly deserve. But he was over-prepared. The thing that was great about it is he didn't doubt himself because of the fact that he took so much action. Another thing that reminds me of, I remember hearing a story that I heard from Jeff Hoffman, who is the founder of Priceline.com. About five years ago, I interviewed him and he was talking about how he was really good friends with Evander Holyfield, who just so happened to

get his ear bitten off by Mike Tyson. But he was friends with him and he remembers he was going through this workout and the workout had 300 sets. And it was this crazy, intense workout that like no human could do. He had 300 sets of this workout and he was sitting there and he was counting them for Evander Holyfield as he was almost done. And he finished one of the last sets and he said, hey, Evander Holyfield comes up to me and goes, hey, was that 300 or was that 299? Jeff Hoffman goes, oh, I think it was 300. And he looks at him and he goes, was it 300 or was it 299? And he said, man, I think it was 300. And he looked at him in the face and he said, listen to me, was it 300 or was it 299? And he goes, I don't know, Evander, what does it really matter? I think it was 300. And he said,

what is it? And he said, he got really looked him dead in the eyes and terrified him. And he goes, the difference between 299 and 300 is the difference between everybody else in the world and the fucking heavyweight champion of the world. That's the difference between 299 and 300. And then he went and did an entire other set. And Jeff Hoffman said at that point, he finally understood what made him great because they put in so much action that they don't doubt themselves. Another example of this, which is another fighter, there's so many different fighters that I have these great stories on that reminds me of is I have a podcast episode coming out in the next few months with George

St. Pierre, who's considered one of the top five UFC fighters. George St. Pierre is one of like the sweetest, most humble, kindest guys. It was amazing to talk to him. He's just so humble and he hates fighting. He doesn't like fighting, but he happens to be one of the best fighters that has ever lived. He just happened to be really good at it. And it was something that could make him a lot of money and get him out of the place that he was in. He just saw it as a way to make money. And he said he hated fighting. It terrified him all of the time. He was so scared of fighting all the time. But the thing that he wasn't scared of was the fact that he had put so much work into himself and he had such great abilities because of all the work that he put into himself.

And he didn't doubt himself. And when he said his lack of doubt came from over-preparation, his lack of doubt came from over-preparation, his lack of doubt came from over-preparation. And he said that he would be terrified as soon as he found out who was fighting. The whole time for the two, three, four, five months that he was in training camp, he would be terrified. For the entire time that he's, you know, sitting out there and thinking about and trying to fall asleep and going to dinner, he said like in dinner, in the middle of dinner, he'd be thinking about fighting and think about fighting. He'd have to, he was just

terrified the entire time. And he was terrified up until the one point where it's about to be his time to fight. He would go to the mirror. He would look at himself in the mirror and he would say to himself, you're better than this guy. You're the best fighter that's out there. You're better than this guy. You're the best fighter that's out there.'re better than this guy you're the best fight it's out there and he would talk to himself in the mirror and what made his fear disappear was him building himself up and talking about how amazing he was and he said that he would then put on a mask he imagined where his name is George St. Pierre after talking to himself he would call himself GSP it was like his alter ego he would would pretend that he was somebody who

would pretend that he was this killer, this guy who was not afraid of anything, who had no doubt, who had no fear, none of those things. And so he literally would step into being a different person and he would be that person the entire rest of the night. That's when he said he would go on autopilot because he was so over-prepared. His body knew better than his mind for what to do in all of these fights. Hey, has this ever happened to you? You need to see a doctor. You search to find one online that looks good. You wait on hold to book an appointment.

You rearrange your entire schedule. You go in and you find out the doctor doesn't even take your insurance. I know it sucks, but there's a solution. Just download the free ZocDoc app. It's the easiest way to find great doctors in your area and instantly book an appointment. And with ZocDoc, you can search for local doctors who take your insurance, read verified patient reviews, and book an appointment in person or video chat. Never wait on hold with a receptionist again. So whether you need a primary care physician, a dentist, a dermatologist, psychiatrist,

eye doctor, or any other specialist, ZocDoc has you covered. Just go to ZocDoc.com slash dial and download the free ZocDoc app to sign up for free. Every month, millions of people are using ZocDoc and ZocDoc makes healthcare easy. Now is the time to prioritize the health. So once again, go to ZocDoc.com slash dial and download the free ZocDoc app and sign up for free with a top rated doctor. Many are available as soon as today. That is Z-O-C-D-O-C.com slash dial. So why do we say this? I bring up three of the greatest fighters who have ever existed. And the beautiful thing about them is that their fear is not like our fear. Like if you have the fear of public speaking, what's the worst that could happen? I mean, you might mess up. You might screw up a few lines. I mean, if you're really terrified, maybe you pee on yourself.

That would be the worst thing that could happen. You could pass out, I guess. The chance of that happening is not really going to happen, but what's going to happen? You could stumble on a few lines. You could mess up. Some people could see it and see you screw up. But no one's going to punch you in the face and possibly knock you out in the middle of thousands of other people and millions of people online. So if these guys had as much fear as they did and they still took action, Are you really going to let other people's opinions of you, what other people think of you, of what could possibly happen about your parents judging you

because you want to switch careers and you don't want to be an electrical engineer anymore and you want to decide to be a painter? Like our fear, if you really think about the fears that are holding you back from everything that you want in this world. Like if I ask you, what is your number one fear that's holding you back? And I don't mean like spiders or heights. I mean like, what is your fear that's holding you back from

doing what is it you want? It's not really that big of a deal. And when you look at it that way, it's like, oh yeah, I'm really just afraid of what other people might say about me. Am I going to die if other people say things about me? No. If my parents don't approve of the degree that I get, am I going to die? No. And you look at all these things, you're like, none of these things that I actually fear around are scary. I'm making them to be these massive scary things. I'm making mountains out of molehills. It's like they're not a big deal, but we make them to be so big in our mind. These guys are literally going into a place of potential death and they're still taking action to get themselves there. You're not going into a place of potential death. You're possibly,

you know, if we talk, go back to public speaking, what are you doing? You're getting on a stage and talking in front of people. There shouldn't be that much fear if you really break it down to its simplest forms. To its simplest forms, here's what's happening. Your physical body is going onto a platform that's a little bit above other people. Maybe those people are standing up, maybe they're sitting down, maybe they're taking notes, but your physical body is raised a little bit above other people. Maybe those people are standing up. Maybe they're sitting down. Maybe they're taking notes, but your physical body is raised a little bit higher than other people's physical body. You're going to stand in front of them and you're going to create sounds from your face for 20, 30 minutes, and then you're going to be done at its simplest form. That is all that you're doing. What is actually scary about that? You're on a platform,

physical body, people are lower than you, and they might be sitting down, and you're going to make sounds from your face. Is that really terrifying? It's not. And when you break it down, it's almost comical, the things that we're quote-unquote afraid of, the things that we have fear over. So when you think about this,

how do I make it easier on myself if public speaking is the example that I want to give? They say that the two biggest fears in the world, number one is public speaking, number two is death. Jerry Seinfeld has a joke around that, says people would rather be inside of the box than giving the eulogy at a funeral. And when you think about it that way, what can I do to make sure that there's less fear, but absolutely no doubt in my mind when I'm going to go out there? The best way for you to be, if public speaking is the thing that we're going off of, the best way for you to be the best public speaker and give the best presentation is to be over-prepared for every single thing. For you to know your subject the best that you possibly can. So instead of thinking about this is what could happen,

this is what could happen, this is what could happen, this is what could happen, and you think about all of the what-ifs, there are no what-ifs. It's just I'm not focusing on those. Those are all potential possible outcomes that are probably not going to happen. So what I am going to do is I'm going to over-prepare. And when you look at these circumstances, you think to yourself, what's the worst possible outcome? The worst possible outcome is never that bad. And so what I'm going to do is I'm going to over-prepare in every single aspect of what it is that I could possibly do so that I might still feel the fear. And you probably will still feel the fear. You will still feel it, but it doesn't matter because I'm

not doubting myself. I'm so over-prepared. I'm so ready to go into it. And I know what it is that I'm going to do that the fear is there, but it doesn't really matter. And that's what's important for you to realize is that fear is never something that should stop you. And one of the things that Mike Tyson said that was amazing is that fear is just a natural human emotion. That's it. You're going to feel fear the same way that you feel tired sometimes, the same way that you feel excited sometimes, the same way that you feel happy, the same way that you feel sad. But when you're happy about something, you don't go, oh my God, I'm happy. I can't jump onto this stage and do public speaking.

No, it's just a natural human emotion. it's just a natural human emotion. And the beautiful thing about fear, what he said is that the beautiful thing about fear is it allows us the strength to build up courage because you can't have any courage unless there's some sort of fear in front of you. Because if we look at it, if I were to walk up to any person and say, hey, would you like to be seen as a person with courage? Would you like to be seen as somebody who is courageous to other people? Everyone would be like, absolutely, because courage is a beautiful emotion. It's a beautiful trait to have. You can't have courage in the absence of fear. Courage can only be built when you have fear that's around you. So you have to think of that same way that you can't grow your muscles unless you go in and lift heavier weights. You can't have courage and be

more courageous and more courageous and more courageous unless you are in the presence of fear often that you're working through all of the time. So if you want to be a courageous person, you have to think to yourself, I've got to see fear. I've got to feel fear. There's always going to be fear present. I feel fear all of the time. Every successful person that you could go out and see and Elon Musk and all of the most successful people in the that you could go out and see and Elon Musk and, you know, all of the most successful people in the world, you go to them and say, hey, do you feel fear sometimes? They're all going to say yes. The difference is the feeling of fear does not stop them from taking the action that they need to in order to get their goals. So next time you feel

fear, realize what that's showing you is it's showing you the edge of your comfort zone. You don't feel fear in your comfort zone, but when you're starting to step out of your comfort zone, like public speaking, the example that we're giving, when you start to step out of your comfort zone, you're going to feel fear. Doing something new is scary to the brain because the brain only cares about your safety. So it doesn't know that when you walk onto stage, that you're going to be safe and you're not going to die because we're tribal people. The brightest lights gets the most arrows. So you have to realize that, oh my gosh, standing in front of people, it leaves me up in front

of people to possibly be attacked. We're not going to be attacked when we're in front of people. Speaking in front of your team meeting in front of 14 other people, you're not going to be attacked, but you have to realize that fear is just this natural emotion that you need to learn to dance with. You don't need to get rid of fear. And in fact, you'll never get rid of fear. So just get used to it. You need to learn to dance with your fear and go, okay, what am I feeling? I'm feeling fear. That's okay. There's nothing wrong with the feeling of fear. So what am I feeling fear around? I'm feeling fear around this. Okay, is that fear stopping me

from still taking action that I need to take? No, it's not at all. Okay, so can I still take the action? Yes. All right, Rob, go ahead and take the action. And that's how you get what it is that you want in life is to notice that fear is omnipresent. It's going to be more present than most other emotions

if you're trying to create the life that you want. If you're trying to step out of your comfort zone, if you're trying to do things you've never done, fear should be omnipresent. But it doesn't mean that because fear is there, you're not going to be able to work through it. The same way that Evander Holyfield, the same way that GSP,

the same way that Mike Tyson all felt fear. The beautiful thing about it, the thing that made them some of the greatest in the world is that when they felt fear, they did it anyways. They never doubted themselves. They overprepared. And in that state, they were able to build more courage than anybody else around them.

So feel the fear and do it anyways. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on your Instagram stories and tag me at RobDialJr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. And if you are out there and you want to receive an email from me every single Monday morning telling you what my intentions are going into every single week, I'm going to send you an email every Monday morning. It's absolutely free. Just go to mondayemail.com. I will tell you what my intentions are going into every single week,

what I'm thinking about going into the week, and you can steal my intentions if you like. You can put them into your week. And that way, you're on the same page as what I'm thinking in my head. So if you want to sign up for that, go to mondayemail.com. It is absolutely free. And I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.