The Mindset Mentor - Ep 25 - Living Life In The Front Row w/ Jon Vroman

Episode Date: October 16, 2015

Jon Vroman is rated the #1 college speaker in America. He also runs a charity celebrating it's 10 year anniversary this year called The Front Row Foundation. In this episode Jon talks about how to live your life in the front row. He speaks about how your environment directly affects your success and how living a life of giving is the happiest way to live. Want to learn more about Mindset Mentor+? For nearly nine years, the Mindset Mentor Podcast has guided you through life's ups and downs. Now, you can dive even deeper with Mindset Mentor Plus. Turn every podcast lesson into real-world results with detailed worksheets, journaling prompts, and a supportive community of like-minded people. Enjoy monthly live Q&A sessions with me, and all this for less than a dollar a day. If you’re committed to real, lasting change, this is for you.Join here 👉 www.mindsetmentor.com My first book that I’ve ever written is now available. It’s called LEVEL UP and It’s a step-by-step guide to go from where you are now, to where you want to be as fast as possible.📚If you want to order yours today, you can just head over to robdial.com/bookHere are some useful links for you… If you want access to a multitude of life advice, self development tips, and exclusive content daily that will help you improve your life, then you can follow me around the web at these links here:Instagram TikTokFacebookYoutube

Psst, hey, do you want a free motivational e-book called Hack Your Goals, a Step-by-Step Guide to Achieving Success? Go to mwfmotivation.com and download it for free like hundreds of other people already have. Okay, now I'll get you back to the podcast. Welcome to the MWF Motivation Podcast, which I am proud to say has been rated the number one podcast in iTunes new and noteworthy in six different categories, including self-help and business, and is a

podcast designed to help you grow into the best version of yourself in 10 to 20 minutes. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, we'll take a life topic, break it down, discuss it, and leave you with thoughts to impact your life and mind. My name is Rob Dial, and the podcast starts now. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the MWF Motivation Podcast. I am so excited for this episode and to bring it to you. I will warn you, it is a little bit longer than typically what we have as far as episode length. But the reason why is because there is so much good stuff in here. I speak with John Vroman, who was rated the number

one college speaker two years in a row and also runs something called the Front Row Foundation. And in this episode, he's going to talk about being an active participant in your life versus being a spectator and letting things happen to you. He's also going to talk about how your environment and everything around you directly affects how successful you will be in life. And he talks about more than anything else, how to live a life of giving. He is the most giving person I've ever met, has an amazing charitable foundation, and I'm so excited to bring you this episode. And if you love this episode, please subscribe to us on iTunes, Stitcher, SoundCloud, however you listen to us. And also please share with a friend. We're trying to

change the world one person at a time. But here is the episode with John Roman. world one person at a time. But here is the episode with Jon Vroman. Welcome to the MWF Motivation Podcast. This is Rob Dial. And I am super excited to have a guest, Jon Vroman, on, which is who is actually the founder of the Front Row Foundation, which is a charity that takes sick or terminally ill people and gives them an amazing night out. Dinner in the front row or backstage tickets to their favorite concert, their favorite sporting event. And they're actually celebrating 10 years this year. But John himself was actually rated the number one college speaker out of thousands of college speakers two years in a row. And he's just an overall inspirational person. I'll admit, John, when I was at a division meeting in 2009, you came down,

and I hands down think you are the best public speaker I've ever seen in person out of everybody. Very close second is your real good friend, though, John Berghoff. Yes. He's really good as well. And now you just live a life of giving back to others. Just started a podcast we were talking about of just wanting to give back to others and help other people as well. And a podcast is a very easy way to spread influence. So I want to dive into that today. Before we do, John Vroman, how are you? I'm awesome, man. Hey, for the record,

that's the first time John Berghoff's been second at anything in his life. That guy's insane. And I also want to talk about circle of influence at some point in time, because your circle of influence between you and Hal and John Berghoff is like the one circle of influence. I would love to just be a fly on the wall whenever you guys talk to each other because it's it's the things that you three do are just incredible but um but i know that you know i like to talk a lot about mindset and i think a lot of of stuff you know the way that we are today stems from being a child and i know that you you have a very unique childhood story so could you before we dive in and talk about you um about your foundation about about giving, and about your network, could you tell me a little bit about your childhood story and how that's played a role in what you are today? Sure. Yeah. I love talking about the past. It doesn't hurt nearly as much as it doesn't hurt now as much as it did back then. So it's a lot easier to talk about.

That's a lot easier to talk about. So the good part of my childhood, which there are many, was that I grew up in a great family, two loving, wonderful parents. The challenging part of my childhood really started at probably like 13, 14 in that time frame when it was clear and obvious that I was not growing anymore. I was 4'10 and weighed about 85 pounds as I went into my sophomore year of high school. Driving to school, I was shorter and smaller than most people in junior high. And that small body, as I often say, created for me, I chose to have a small mindset as a result of that. And so this time in my life was really, I would say it was difficult

and painful because I let it be that way. I chose to see myself as small and I let other people treat me that way. So there was a lot of bullying and there were days when I'd say depression would dominate. And that existed for quite some time. Eventually, through some medical support, I did grow. And when I found these, what I would call these new superpowers, I was taller and I got recognized a little more. So I fit in a little more. I went crazy. And at that point, what I mean when I went crazy is I just did everything I could to fit in because I felt like such an outsider for so long that I would do all sorts of crazy things. So part of my youth was connected to drugs and alcohol and acting out in a way that at the time probably appeared that I was a jerk. But really, I was confused, angry at some things,

wanted to fit in so badly. I had these needs as a human that I was meeting in some unhealthy ways. And thank goodness that changed. But that part of my life was very tough. But at the same time, and I know you believe this, is that those moments now give me an anchor in which I can really serve from because I'm very close to the feeling of what it's like to be alone or feeling like you're not enough or feeling like you have something to prove and feeling like you don't fit in or feeling like you're a spectator of life. And that was my childhood. Yeah. Now let me ask you this. Cause,

cause you might feel the same way that I do. When you said you acted out, you were a jerk. Was it that you were kind of cocky? And in, in, in that sense, I know that I feel like if, if people look back at me when I was younger, they thought I was really cocky and brash and said all the wrong stuff. Do you think in that sense, when people act that way, that it's to try to show they're confident when it's more of a lack of confidence than anything else they're trying to cover up? Yeah, I think, yeah, definitely trying to feel, we're all trying to feel similar feelings. I think people want to feel powerful. They want to feel important. They want to feel significant or whatever word you want to put in there. These

are positive feelings. I want my son to feel powerful. It's you want to put in there. These are positive feelings. I want my son to feel powerful. It's just how we go about doing it. And I think that we're, that's the art form. You know, that's how we test out different ways to apply our powers or to feel certain feelings in this world. I tested things that didn't work in,'t work, that weren't sustainable. So yeah, I have a belief that I did not make this up. I heard this many times along the way in my journey of being coached

by great individuals that have said, all actions are paved with a positive intent. And I really believe that. I believe that all my actions as a child were paved with a positive intent. And I really believe that. I believe that all my actions as a child were paved with a positive intent. But how we get there is we don't always choose the right path. So yeah, I think all people are looking for similar things. It's just how we're going about it. Yeah. And so when you talk about how you acted out and then eventually became who you are now, would you say that the main catalyst for change at that point in time was becoming a Cutco rep? Would you say that that was what forced you to start growing, besides growing up as physically, but would you say emotionally and with personal growth? Would you say that was a catalyst? Yeah. I don't know if you know this story,

Rob, but for everybody listening, our connection was through this company, Cutco, and I started selling kitchen knives when I was 19 years old. I got the job and I worked for a week and then I quit because they were calling my house saying, hey, what are you doing today? I was like, I thought this was really flexible. So I quit and I quit for the whole summer. And then I realized at the end of the summer that that was a pretty cool job and I should probably try to go get the job back.

So I remember I walked into the office with my tail between my legs and I said, hey, how do I get my job back? And the manager, Rich Plaskin, who you know of, he said, you have to sell $1,000 a week for the next 10 weeks and you can have your job back. And I did it. I sold $10,000 in the next 10 weeks. I became his assistant manager. And that was one of the transformational moments of my life when I changed my environment. Because as we both know, that was such a positive environment, rich with ideas for growth and constantly being in that office environment, surrounded by people who were trying to elevate their game,

that was pivotal for me. Changing my environment was what made the biggest impact in my life. And that environment was super positive. That's awesome. Actually, that brings up a really good question when you talk about your environment. Because as I was doing my research, I was listening to other podcasts that you have and other ones that you've been on. And you talked about something that was

really interesting to me. And to be honest with you, I'm going to steal the idea as soon as we get off the call today. But one of the things that you talk about is the calendar that you have on your wall. Oh, yeah, it was for the next two years. And I thought that was just an incredible idea. Because you mentioned that you're a very visual person. I'm exactly the same where I have to see stuff in order for me to remember in order for it to click in order for it to really, you know, it has to be there in the physical sense for it to really have a meeting for me. And then you also talked about, you know, something I thought was, was awesome. Cause I was, I always think this where I'm like, you know, you and Hal and John, you all have kids.

You all have two kids, I believe, each of you. And I was just thinking those kids are just going to be like the most mentally strong kids ever. Like the kids that you guys are having and, you know, when they grow up, they're just going to be awesome. I can't wait to see what they do with the world. But you talk about how you go over certain words with your kids and you put it on the wall and you speak about it. And so can you talk to me about the environment that's in your house and then also the environment you create for your kids and for yourself in your office? Ah, yeah. I love this question, Rob. And this is something I'm passionate about. As you know, my whole life is built around this front row concept.

And to me, front row is all about proximity. It's all about putting ourselves close to the people, places, and things that inspire us. And so I am very intentional about what my environment looks like. And whether or not something provides great energy or takes energy away, I'm very conscious about the environment I put my children in. I work very, very hard to script environments that allow them to flourish. So we will travel great distances to be with great people because I believe that no greater gift could I give to my boys than I could of developing a community, a tribe, a village that will raise great children. I don't think two people raise great children. I think the village does. And I think that my greatest gift to my children is the

network that I create with and for them. So I had the great privilege last night, Rob, of having dinner with a group of people in New York City that I was pinching myself as I was sitting around the table with some of these people. And I won't tell you names, but I will tell you this. One of the persons, the person's house that we were at, gave one of the greatest TED Talks of all time. And I said to my wife as we were driving there, I go,

do you realize this summer we were sitting on our back porch and we were watching this person's TED Talk and we were both saying, this is one of the best TED Talks of all time. And then literally months later, we're in this person's house having a glass of wine, having a one-to-one conversation. And I'm still, dude, this is 12 hours ago. This is 12 hours ago. And I'm still pinching myself.

But this wasn't an easy thing for us to create for us in our lives because we have two children. Getting to New York was about two hours away. I had all this stuff. I had to move around. We had an expensive 24 hours making all this work. There's four people at my house supporting us. You know, like we have, we were laughing because like there's a cleaner here. There's the babysitter was here.

We had, I mean, it was literally like my assistant was at the house. We had all these people. And I said to my wife, I said, this, this is what creating culture or community is all about. And this is why scripting, not only our physical environment, but the people in our environment is everything. This is everything. And last night, the person who hosted this party brought 20 people together that we met three or four people that could literally be some of our best friends last night. And it's that type of thing where at the end of the night, people are saying, oh, you've got to come see me in Vancouver.

And you've got to come see me. And this guy's like, you've got to stay with me in Paris. And I'm like, oh, this is crazy. But what I think is that I know this started with the wall calendar. And we talk about the purpose of our environment. But I share this idea of the people and this dinner and choosing to travel distances to be with people, et cetera, as a way to say that everything around me is critical to shaping our environment, the people, places, and things. So yeah,

the wall calendar that gets hung up. We have a dream wall in our home. We have the journals for our children are on the kitchen table. And I'm like, they don't move from the kitchen table because if we have to go to the shelf to get the journal, we won't do it. But if they are in the middle of our kitchen table, we will journal for our boys. I'll ask them what was a magic moment today and we'll put it in their journal. My one-year-old never answers that question, but I just answer it for him. And like you mentioned earlier, it's like I write words on the mirrors in the bathrooms with markers, with these dry erase markers. I will write keywords. I

write messages to my wife. I write messages to myself. We have a chalkboard wall in the kitchen. We're constantly writing messages to each other. I don't know if you saw this one, but I posted one that my wife wrote for me. I came down in the morning. It literally brought me to tears having this on the wall. My wife writes notes for our children. Tiger, my six-year-old, puts them in his lunchbox almost every day, not 100% of the time, but 80% of the time. And so for us and for your listeners, Rob, my challenge for everybody listening is this, is what can you do today to make even one shift to your environment and give yourself a front row seat to that thing, that person, that whatever that will help elevate your life? And that is what front row living is all about. Man, that's awesome. All right. So now

we got to dive in even, I feel like we could stop there and that's really good, but now we got to even dive in deeper because you said some stuff, especially with proximity. And I know that this is really what I want to dive into is the Front Row Foundation and your metaphor for living life in the front row. And I have to tell you this because it's kind of serendipitous that this happened. But so this past weekend, I went to ACL, which is the festival that's in Austin. And there's a ton of incredible people that play, but there's thousands and thousands of people, and it's the hot sun, and you don't want to get too much into the crowd sometimes. And so what happened was this, we kind of sat in the back with all of our friends.

We could have a big group of friends that didn't want to sweat all over everybody. And then what happened was we decided to skip a show to go see Hozier and actually get there an hour before so we could be closer to the front. And what I mean, I mean like three people back from the very front of Hozier. Yeah. And every single person that we were with, we asked them out of three days in probably 30 different shows that we saw, what was the best show that we saw out of everybody? And every single person said Hozier.

And I think that besides the fact the guy's an incredible artist, he's amazing live, I think the proximity and being in the group of all of the other people made a big difference. And then I also noticed that right after Hozier, we went to go see a guy named The Weeknd. And The Weeknd, we were way out in the back. And my girlfriend's favorite artist is The Weeknd. She's never seen him before. And she's like, you know, I'm kind of bored with him

live. Like, I guess I've listened to him too much. And exactly what I did, I said, you know what we need to do? I think we need to move closer. And we got in closer. And it went from us, you know, kind of sitting and watching, you know, from the back to dancing and having a really good time and singing. And then she said, you know, that was actually a really good show live. I'm glad that we moved up closer. So could you talk to me about the front row foundation, the metaphor of living your life in the front row? Because I know that's basically how you live your life and your mantra to your life. Yeah, absolutely. My favorite topic. So, and favorite topic. And I'll back up for a moment and say where this began was at a concert where I was in the back and I noticed that there was a

massive difference in the energy from the front to the back just in the way people were participating. And I said to my girlfriend at the time, I said, man, life is different in the front row. And that began my obsession for finding out how people live every day in the front row as the metaphor for which I saw the world and where I was being a spectator and where I was just playing it safe. And I still do that, Rob. It is easier to be in the back. For me, at this very day, I can walk into a room and it's so easy to be in the back. You can leave.

You can look at your phone, you're less accountable. And, you know, when you're in the front, sometimes it's a vulnerable place to be. Everybody can see you, you can't see them. You know, the front can be crowded. You know, the front can be a little aggressive. It's not always pretty in the front, but it is certainly meaningful and it's certainly more energetic. And I think that's a great metaphor for our lives is sometimes we got to get in there and, you know, you get a little close with people and you do get a little sweaty and you do, you know, it is a little uncomfortable and it's harder to get to the bathroom, but man, you are really feeling it and living it and experiencing life to the fullest. So we're all, you know, this back in 2005 was where this, this metaphor hit me.

So we're all, you know, this back in 2005 was where this, this metaphor hit me. And that same year we decided that we wanted to give, and I say we meaning myself and my group of friends decided we wanted to give in bigger ways. We weren't happy with how we were showing up in the category of contribution in our lives. So we said, you know, we started thinking about charities that we could support. And that conversation led to, well, if we started a charity, what would it be? And that led to Front Row Foundation being born. And what we do now is we put children and adults, as you said, in the front row of their favorite live event, concerts, sporting events, any live performance. And what makes our charity unique is that it's not just

about making a dream come true, although that could be the case for many people, is that this is a dream event. They're raving fans that we put in the front row. But more so, this is about how we live every day of our life. So this one moment becomes the platform from which we can leap forward and live differently, live as participants, not as spectators watching safely from afar, but like saying yes and getting in there, you know, playing full out. That's what we wanted for everybody. So no matter how many days you have, as we know, tomorrow is guaranteed to nobody that we get to live big and give big every day that we can. And so that just became our way of wanting to give back.

And the charity is in its 10th year. And we've created many experiences that we're very proud of. And we're still connected to many of the families. We often say it's a forever thing when people get connected to the Front Row Foundation. And it becomes something that is a choice. And I know you believe this. We don't always choose our seat, but we can always choose our experience. And so I think that we don't always end up in row one center.

But a lot of people will let that seat dictate their experience. They let the band or the game dictate their experience. When I'm on stage, I will often say to a crowd, don't let me dictate the quality of your day today. Don't give me that power. This is your life. This is your event. This is your next hour.

So you make the most of this no matter what I do. Commit to that on your own and approach everything like that. And that's where life starts to really shift for us. So my life is split directly down the middle between what I do with my speaking and coaching and this personal growth side of my world, which is how I make money with my family. And on the other side is the charity, which I don't get paid to do the stuff with the charity, but half of my time goes to Front Row Foundation. I love it. It's something that when I get to the end of my life, I think, Rob, that the Front Row Foundation will be the

thing I'm most proud of. And by the way, I say that in something I've built, and I'm not comparing that to my children or anything in that context. But when it comes to things I've created or done externally in my life or gifts I've given to the world, I think that we'll just say Front Row Foundation is going to be at the very top of that list. I'm passionate about it. We have a great family, a group of people. The Front Row community is incredible. And it's great. So, and thanks, thanks to you, by the way, for having me on your show and allowing me to share this

vision with everybody. I appreciate that. It helps the, helps the entire cause. Yeah, absolutely. Now let me ask you this with, I, I, I have the shirt with the, you know, the 10 and on the zero, it shows all of the different concerts and everything that you've taken people to, um, how at this point in time, how many concerts and festivals and sporting events have you taken people to? And out of all of them, if you could pick one, what would you say, if you could give us your favorite story and how that changed that person's life through that one night? Yeah. So as far as experiences, we're approaching 100, which is very cool. As far as which one I like to talk about, they're all great. And as you know, it's so difficult to pick just one

that is your favorite or one that's a highlight. But I have one that's easy to tell the story of because it was one of the earliest and it's one that had a huge impact on me. And that was a little girl named Sophie, who we took to see Kelly Clarkson. And it was limousines and dinners and her whole family went. And Kelly gave her a little shout, kind of like a shout out, pointed in her direction and acknowledged her in the show. And then at the end, she was four. She was four. And I should mention this too, Rob, because what just jumped into your audience's mind, which jumped into my mind at the time, was how big of a fan could a four-year-old actually be? And we found out that this little girl knew all the words to all the Kelly Clarkson songs. She was a raving fan. And our team fell in love with her. We went to work. And we actually, a mutual friend of ours, John Rulon, had a connection that got us backstage with Kelly Clarkson. Talk about the power, Sophie had already fallen asleep in her mother's arms. But when Kelly announced, hey, y'all, little Sophie wakes up immediately, turns and locks eyes with Kelly and smiles ear to ear.

And we have a picture of that exact moment. And that smile, Rob, is why I do what I do. And that image is forever etched into my mind. And I'm still to this day in touch with mom, Lauren, Sophie's mom, about that event. Sophie sadly passed away shortly after. But I will tell you that my connection to Lauren since then and being able to celebrate Sophie's life to this very day. We've attended fundraisers of theirs. We just were messaging each other the other day. That's the forever part. And so one half of our recipients, about one half, just shy of that, this is the last day out that they celebrate with their families. Statistically speaking, this is the last day out. And what's great about, I think what we're up to is the stories that we tell.

Those memories live on and on and on. And I think that's one of the things that makes our charity so unique and different. These videos and the books, it's really awesome. Man, that is incredible. It's an incredible story. So when, I know you talked about how you got the idea for it, but have you always been a person that gives so much? Or did your parents teach it to you? Or growing up, did you learn it? How did you become a person? Let me ask you this. How did you become a person that gives so much? And what have you noticed in your life and how it's changed since you've been a person that gives? So I think we're all born to give.

I think that it's within us all. I think that we lose sight of that at times, trying to find significance in our own lives. And I think we can all be very selfish. I certainly have had many countless selfish moments in my life. But when I think about what really lights me up, it's when we give something to others. Now, I do think, and I totally subscribe to, that you need to give to yourself. You need to take care of your health. You need to make sure that you're in a position to take care of other people.

So I do think you're the first priority. But too many times, we really raise the bar as to what taking care of ourselves feels like before we give to others. I got to get to that beamer before I focus on helping somebody. I don't think that's healthy, per se. But I've had some great mentors, some great people to challenge me in my thinking with this. I've been exposed to people on both sides. I've been exposed to some really selfish, greedy people that are not that at the core. They're acting that way. That has been enough of a turn off to notice what the other side looks like.

And then I've also been exposed to people that are just so charitable, so giving, that have been really inspiring. My parents are great. We talked about this a little before the show starts. And I think this is a good place to put the story. But it was my dad gave us a gift when we were kids. You reminded me of this. I'd actually forgotten this for the moment. But he gave us, instead of a present for whatever it was, a birthday or Christmas, he gave us a letter. And we opened it up and it said, for the holidays, I donated a flock of geese to a family in a country where this would feed them for a year. And I remember there's two things that happened. You know, there's this moment when you're almost let down. You're like, oh, really? But there was also an equal and inspiring moment of this is really

meaningful. And I knew that at the time. And ever since then, year after year after year, that gift has actually become more powerful in my life. And now I'm inspired even to think about that with our own children. We were talking about this last night, my wife and I, about how we want there to be experiences, not things. That if one of the ways we can judge our success as a parent is if our children value experiences over things. And so any way that we can shape experiences now that help instill that belief or reveal that belief, Rob, not that we put the belief into our children, but that we just reveal it or help them become aware of what is born into them as a belief of contribution and experiencing life. And I think that's what's critical.

I think we do learn it from our tribe. I think it's part nurture, but I also think it's nature for sure. And I think we can learn to suppress it by numbing ourselves with these activities of self-indulgence to the point of where it is a never-ending chase to satiate this need for more versus this need of connection and contribution and giving back. I'm not always great at it. I'm not always focused on it. I'm human. I let

emotions run rampant in my head, heart, soul that take me away from that. I do charity for the wrong reasons at times. And that's when I'm numb. That's when I'm not thinking. That's when I'm not aware. But the minute I snap out of that and remember why I'm here and what I'm doing, and that it's not just about the admin part of even doing our charitable work, but the people and the soul behind it, that's when we jump back into the clarity and move forward and usually take quantum leaps in those areas. Yeah, that's when we jump back into the clarity and move forward and usually take quantum leaps in those areas. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, the reason why the geese thing was brought up was because I heard that story when I was at the Best Year Ever Blueprint last

year. And that was the beginning of December, I think it was. And my sister has four kids, ranging from two to 11. And I always give them gifts. As an uncle, two years ago, I got them a big basketball hoop, and they love it, and they play with it every day. And I was struggling on what to get them. And I heard you say that, and I was like, man, that's probably the best gift that I could possibly give them. They're very much a giving family. They go to church all the time. They tithe. They know all about that. And so I gave them, that was their gift, all four of the kids. It was something like 200 meals to children is what it was. And so I decided at that point in time that from now on, instead of buying them a big toy because they

have tons of them or, you know, basketball hoop and all of those things, is it's going to be some type of charitable giving. And as they get older every single year, I think they're going to start appreciating it more and more. Absolutely. And, you that, Rob, and support you in that is that in my presentation that I give often on college campuses and for corporations, I have a point that I talk about change. And I show a video of my son, I don't know if you've seen this, of him eating yogurt for the first time. And this is unsweetened yogurt. And his reaction is that, I mean, he's spitting it out. He hates it.

He's making these incredibly humorous faces. And the whole point is that what's good for us isn't always easy going down. And it would have been easy to win him over with sugar. And those are the big gifts. It's easy to draw out the huge smiles and the, oh yeah, this is amazing. But if we're in it for the long haul, if we're in it for what's sustainable, I'm still to this day, and I just celebrated my 40th birthday talking about this gift that my dad

gave to me. So talk about impact. You notice that we're not talking about the present that he gave me that was whatever it was that I don't have any clue at this point. That's the amazing part of this. Now, I think there's a balance there. It's not that you never want to make your child smile right now today because you gave them an awesome gift, but we can actually do damage if we're not conscious of this gift giving and what the intent is behind it and the meaning that our children or others... If you're listening and you don't have kids, it's not about that. It's about even the gifts that you give to peers, to friends, which ones have an impact that lasts that also help shape their destiny as much as your own. That's awesome. And one thing that you said is,

I want to go back to, is you talk about giving when you're ready, which I think is a really big thing because most people always say, like you said, I want to get my first BMW first. Before I start giving to other people, I want to acquire $100,000 in the bank or something, or a million dollars, whatever it might be. And I think the phrase is, if you have a dollar and you don't want to give 10 cents to that dollar, you're not going to give 10% of the million when eventually you get there. So how do you, how do you view abundance in that sense where, you know, scarcity versus abundance? I think most people were in a very, maybe with advertising, we think very, everything's very scarce. You know, we have, we always have to get this, we have to get the new one. We have to acquire this because I feel like advertising can help us not feel like we're enough, which

puts us in scarcity mode. But how do you deal with that and also think abundantly versus scarce throughout your entire life? I think it's because we're often taught and trained and encouraged to measure. We want to see who wins. So what is quantifiable about that? A lot of people are like, where's the science behind that? Show me how to quantify that. Show me the numbers. I'm like, these are all valid questions in certain places and under, you know, in certain contexts. But the thing about giving in good deeds is it's very difficult to oftentimes measure or quantify impact in that way.

And the example I almost always use when talking about this with people is I say, look, there's no doubt Bill Gates, if you just look at how much money is there, you can quantify how many lives he might have saved or what you can see the impact that he might have had with his organization and what he's doing in the world. But does that make him more valuable than the person who answered the suicide hotline recently and saved someone's life? Because here's the thing. We don't even know their name or what they did. But what if, Rob, that person who answered the suicide hotline saved the life of a brilliant mind that one year from now

is going to find the cure for cancer. Now, we don't know the depth or, you know, the, we don't know our real impact in the world. We don't. Nobody can. You could argue it from so many different angles. But the point is that we know in our hearts that if we just do what we can. See, I just talked about this with somebody recently, is about what level 10 giving can look like right now. Sometimes I talk with parents that are like, I just don't have the time right now being a parent to give at the level that I want to give. And I'm like, you're a parent. You're giving at a level 10.

So it's how they're framing their contributions. This is not about money. It is not about how many hours you're donating. It's not about comparing yourself to others. Some people are like, you started your own charity, John. It's like they're almost throwing themselves under – they're putting themselves down. I want to do something like that. I'm like, that doesn't – by the way, these are not things that we need to look at and compare ourselves to and measure ourselves against, but that we can simply say, based on where I am, knowing my gifts, knowing my position in the world, knowing my

current resources and environment, and if I align with what my soul says yes to, then I can get to a level 10 contribution, and that's what the world needs. One of my favorite quotes, I know you've heard this before, it's Howard Thurman, don't ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive and go do that, because what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive and go do that because what the world needs is for people who've come alive. And I think that contribution is that way of feeling like if you're doing things that make you feel totally alive in the place of service, if you're asking yourself questions like, how can I serve at a deep level? Or even acknowledging yourself like, how did I serve today? In what ways did I contribute to the world? And

try to make a list. Try to journal as many things as you can about how you contributed to the world. Try to catch in others when they're giving to the world. Because one of the fastest ways to recognize it in our own lives, Rob, is to recognize it in others. That when we start making it a point to catch people contributing and recognizing and honoring for that, honoring them, we see ourselves in their actions. We can see the ability to make a great impact. So when we get good at recognizing others, we'll get good at feeling even in ourselves that we're doing more and more and more. Even that by itself, by the way, you recognizing others for their contributions amplifies that. There's so many ways we can give is my point. That's awesome.

And what goes along with that, as I know I've heard you speak about it before, maybe it was a past event of trying to make everyone that you come in contact with feel like a rock star. And I think that deals perfectly with it. Could you tell me a little bit about your feelings on that and how you go about doing so as well? Oh, man. I don't know. Well, I'll tell the story in case you won't know it or not. But where that came from was Dave Matthews' concert. I got invited to go see a private show with Dave.

I'm jealous of that. But at that point, at this point of my being a fan of Dave, I was just a fan of his music. I didn't know what he looked like. I didn't like even like his first album didn't have his picture on it. Like I didn't have posters of Dave in my room, you know. And it's not like he's a huge celebrity that's constantly walking the red carpets everywhere and then on the cover of every magazine. So I just didn't know what he looked like. But I loved his music. I was a big fan and I was walking through a hallway and I was so caught up on getting to the show and seeing Dave and I blew off this guy in the hallway. And I realized shortly thereafter that it was Dave Matthews. I walked by Dave Matthews, but I didn't say hi. I didn't say what's up. I just blew him off because I was on my way to see the rock star.

Oh, man. something amazing about this person and I'm going to find out what it is. Like, you know, this person is my master in some way. And I repeat to myself, I love this person. You know, this could be, you know, I'm just telling myself amazing things. Like the same things we say to ourselves when we meet rock stars, you know, like I love this person. This person's amazing. They're so great. And we, we almost want them to be great. You know, we root for them. We give them great leeway even in ways that like, oh, well, it's okay that they're not, you know, that they punched that person in the face. They're still a great person, you know, but the idea is to treat everybody we meet like a rock star. And when we do that, our world, our world totally transforms. And right now somebody's listening to this, they're going, that's exactly how I am. And I go, great, what's the next level for you? What does that look like,

you know, at the next level? Because there's always room for improvement, right? And if you're on this call and you're like, man, I judge people. I do. I still wrestle with this to this very day. Yeah, me too. And I think anybody who says they don't is just outright lying. Yeah, for sure. I mean, it's just something we all wrestle with. So trying to find the good. Absolutely. Now, one of the last things I want to go over, because I feel like it's part of the metaphor. And I think that fear holds people

back from achieving their dreams. That's probably one of the number one things that really holds people back. And I think that fear is also what keeps somebody in the back row and not moving into the front row because they don't want to be in the front row and, you know, dance and be judged. And I feel that fear is the main reason why people don't go for it. You know, they don't think about the fact that this is the one freaking life that they have to live on this planet and that they're wasting it because of, you know, there might be other people who might judge them. And I think that living your life in the front row is the perfect metaphor for it. So for people who have fear of living their life in the front row or going after their dreams or, you know, stepping out and doing something different, what type of

tips can you give them to get over that fear so that therefore they can really live the life that they deserve? Practice it and surround yourself with people who are doing it are probably two of the biggest ways. For me, it's about forcing myself, even if it's playfully, to get out of my comfort zone. I tell a story in my speeches about dancing in my car at a traffic light. Have you ever heard? I love this story. I love this story and I love the super fantastic story. Those two stories are incredible. They're always crowd favorites. The one dancing in the car I'll share with your audience was that I was jamming in my car. I was listening to Viva La Vida by Coldplay, and I was singing and dancing.

And I get to the traffic light, and I go from a level 10 dance party to a level 2. And I'm scared to dance in front of people. I don't want to be judged. I don't want to be looked, right? And I think a lot of people relate to that. Well, I said to myself, I was like, John, this is ridiculous. Why would you literally go from living a level 10 life to a level two life? Because you're worried about what somebody is going to think of you. Probably you're never going to see this person ever again for the rest of your life. And even if you did, who cares? But the point is,

you know, I said, next traffic light, sing and dance like nobody's around. It's like a personal challenge. And this was very difficult for me. Like literally my hands started sweating and I'm like, oh my gosh, like if I'm that terrified just to sing and dance at a traffic light, where else am I terrified in my life? What else am I holding back on? What else am I not doing to honor my, my gifts to the world by just being me? So I get to the traffic light, I'm singing, I'm dancing, and eventually I see that next to me is a car full of older folks that are probably literally in their 80s. And they're looking at me, and I just keep dancing. And this is my challenge. It's my challenge is to not stop dancing. And this entire car, Rob, starts dancing, right? It was like a senior citizens dance party next to me.

And I was cracking up and they're smiling. And I felt life. I've breathed in what life is really about. And I tell people all the time, I go, that's real leadership. about. And I tell people all the time, I go, that's real leadership. And Marianne Williamson, who's been quoted a bazillion times, rightfully so, for the quote of, when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same, sums up that point exactly about what being in the front row is. And we talk about standing up, stepping up, and speaking up in your life. The number one reason students don't get as much out of their school is because they're

too afraid to participate. They're too afraid to engage in their classes and raise their hand and ask the question. Too many times we're afraid to do the thing that would have the biggest impact in the world. Even for me, launching my own podcast, and I'm guessing you could relate to this too, Rob. Some level is that for me, there was fear in that. And also because I didn't want to let people down. I questioned myself in launching the podcast. I was like, what do I have to say that's any different than anybody else? Who am I to be sharing these ideas? And it's coming from a good place, a place of wanting to be humble. Um, not,

you know, sometimes it's like, well, I don't want to dance at the traffic light cause I don't want to make the person next to me uncomfortable. But I think, you know, sometimes it's our job to just be ourselves. It's not, it's not our job to make sure everybody else is okay. So I want to repeat that. It's our job to be ourselves at a level 10 of whatever that looks like. It's not our job to make sure everybody else is okay with that. Right? So that idea and that having conversations around the subject helps. Practicing it helps. And being with people that demonstrate it helps.

Man, that is awesome. I have to tell you this story because ACL, once again, I was there this weekend. There was a 74-year-old guy. I don't know if you know the rap group Run the Jewels. They're kind of like, not really gangster rap, whatever they are. But I was watching this guy who's 74 years old. And he, out of the entire crowd of 10,000 people, was dancing harder than anybody else, all by himself, to the point where everyone... It was like that video. Have you ever seen that one guy? Derek Sivers has the TED Talk where he talks about the guy that goes... Sasquatch Film Festival. Yeah. He just starts dancing by himself and joins in. And people got inspired by this guy not giving

a crap of what anybody thought. And then everybody thought this guy was awesome because he doesn't give a crap what anybody thinks. He's living his life. He's dancing to rap that he's, I'm sure, I'm sure he's not a Run the Jewels fan, but if he is, more power to him. But he was just dancing for 20 minutes. I mean, this guy got covered in sweat, 74 years old, and everybody wanted to meet him at the end of this concert. It was awesome. So I completely agree with you. That is incredible. Let me ask you this as the final question to wrap up. you. That is incredible. Let me ask you this as the final question to wrap up. If you could pick, what is your absolute favorite book that you could recommend to people? If you can't pick one, what would you say are the top two books out of every book you've ever read that you would say,

you know, if I could only give one to two book recommendations before the end of my life, what would they be? So this is great. And it's also agonizing. So hard. I know. I know. It's very difficult. But here's what I say. I say, just go with whatever, like I tell people, just go with whatever jumps into your mind. And that's a good answer. Just go with your heart. So here's my heart. I'm going to give you two, and I want to honor our mutual friend. I know a guest on your podcast already, Hal Elrod, who I have seen firsthand as he put out the Miracle Morning impact thousands of lives, including my own. So that would be one book. I always say to people, the step number one to living life in the front row is to create a Miracle Morning routine for yourself. That's step one. That is the starting place. The second book would be one that in 2005 just rocked my world. And it was The Ultra Marathon Man by Dean Karnasas. And Dean is an endurance runner. And at the point when I read this book, I wasn't a runner at all. And I

don't think you need to be a runner to be totally transformed by this book. But this book absolutely shattered these mental barriers in my mind in certain aspects of my life about what I was capable of. And it wasn't just physical. It was just if it could happen in a physical sense of what I was capable of and I could do so much more, where else in my life did that same question or philosophy apply of what else was I capable of? And this idea of just saying, man, it's the four-minute mile philosophy, right? It's like, where can I bust through? What can I do this year that right now I think is impossible? And I love that thought of, if you can't, you must. You know, that's a very powerful phrase for me. So if I catch myself saying that, I ask, you know,

how can I throw myself into that even more then and really go on faith and not be afraid to fail? Because I think that so many people say it brilliantly way more eloquently than I can. But it's always about seeing how many times can you fail this year because it's very indicative to how quickly you'll achieve success. And so I think that those two books I'm just going to throw out there, The Miracle Morning and Ultra Marathon Man are game changers. Love it. Great stuff.

So John, to wrap up, how can the listeners get a hold of you? Can you tell us about your podcast and then also how they can get a hold of you website any other way? Yeah, man. Well, I can tell you folks this. My podcast is not as good as Rob's, but it's catching up. It's in the infant stages. I'm getting scared for two months down the road

what it's going to be when you get to two months like me. So after you're done listening to all of Rob's episodes, head on over to Front Row Factor. And our podcast is all about exploring moments of people's lives where they went from back row to front row. So where they stepped up and we dig into that story. So it's a lot of fun.

You track me down there or at frontrowfactor.com. We'll kind of get you to everything front row related. So if you're caught by the charity or you want to learn more about our speaking, we have a speaker trainer event that we do each year that we train people how to be professional speakers and presenters and both B2B businesses and, you know, one to thousands. So that's a lot of fun. We'd love to have people check that out. But that's it, man. All good.

That's awesome. Well, I really appreciate your time. Well, I really appreciate your time. And actually what I've decided as we get off the call is that the Christmas gift for my four, three nephews and one niece are going to be to the Front Row Foundation. That's going to be their charitable gift for this year. That's awesome, Rob. Thanks, man. We want to share that with the community. So let's make sure we follow up on that. Absolutely. I will. Well, I appreciate your time and I hope you have an amazing day. Thanks, buddy. You too. will. Well, I appreciate your time and I hope you have an amazing day. Thanks, buddy. You too.

And so that is it. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. If you like what you hear, please share with a friend, spread the love if you think it's something they could benefit from. If you want the show notes from today, you can get it at mwfmotivation.com, which is also where you can download our free ebook, which is called Hack Your Goals, The Step-by-Step Process to Achieving Success. And if you want to keep in touch with us, you can follow us on Facebook or Instagram. Both of those are at MWF Motivation. And if you like what we have, please subscribe to us on iTunes, Stitcher or SoundCloud because we make it our mission to give you as much valuable stuff as possible. But thank you so much again for listening, and I hope you have an amazing day. Outro Music