The Mindset Mentor - How to Trick Your Brain into Liking Discipline

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I am your host, Rob Dial. If you have not, you done so hit that subscribe button so you never miss another episode. We put out episodes four times a week to help you learn and grow and improve yourself because if you can improve yourself, you can improve your life. So if you want to do that, hit that subscribe button. Today, I'm going to talk about how to actually get yourself. to enjoy taking action because you don't need another productivity hack, you already know

Starting point is 00:00:37 what to do in your life, but somehow you're not doing it. You're still stuck. You're still hesitating. You're still scrolling. You're still quote unquote thinking about it. And deep down, like you actually are starting to hate that you're becoming the type of person who keeps almost starting or who starts and then immediately gives up. But I want to be really honest with you. you probably think you need more discipline. You probably think it's more action. You probably think all of that. But before you do any of that,

Starting point is 00:01:08 it goes much, much deeper psychologically and neurologically into your brain and into the wiring of your safety mechanisms in your brain. And so today we're going to talk about how to outsmart those parts of your brain and even trick your brain into enjoying taking action. And I'm going to dive into the three reasons why you're not discipline and taking action

Starting point is 00:01:27 and then talk about how to overcome them. So first one, number one is fear. At its simplest form, your brain thinks that taking action equals danger. So whenever somebody comes to me and they're like, Rob, I'm procrastinating, or I need to take more action, I need more discipline, or I want to do this thing and I'm not doing it, the very first question I always ask them is, what are you afraid of? Because at its simplest form, I want to do something, I'm not doing it. At its simplest form, you're probably afraid of something. You know if you've been listening to this podcast for a while, your brain's number one job isn't productivity.

Starting point is 00:02:05 It's not discipline. It's not taking action. It is survival. And that lazy voice that's in the back of your head, that's your limbic system just trying to keep you, quote, unquote, safe. But the only thing that's keeping you safe from is just a little bit of discomfort. And so inside of your brain, taking action,

Starting point is 00:02:23 you might know consciously with the 5% of your mind that is your conscious mind that you're going to be taking action and sending an email or doing cold calls, you're growing your business, and you're not going to die doing it. But 95% of the thing that's running in the show, which is your subconscious mind, sees taking action as stepping into the unknown, doing something you've never done before. And your brain interprets the unknown as danger. Your brain interprets that as a threat. And so instead of logically saying, hey, the reason why we're not going to grow this business is because you're afraid of failure or because of whatever it might be, you just go, I want to do this, I want to do this, I want to do this,

Starting point is 00:03:02 why the hell am I not doing it? Because your brain's already 10 steps ahead of you. And so you end up scrolling or checking your email because scrolling on social media or checking your email feels safer to your brain than starting that side business. Because number one, it's unknown. Oh my gosh, I have to start this business. I don't know what's going to be coming. coming up for me. And number two, if I do start the business, possible failure. So those are two things that I'm now afraid of. And I'm not even aware that I'm afraid of them. So I would rather just unconsciously do nothing and not set myself up for danger in some sort of way. And so what you have to understand is it requires a heightened sense of awareness about yourself. Because fear tends to

Starting point is 00:03:49 be this like invisible leash that's keeping us stuck in the exact same place. This is like where one of the key places where self-sabotage comes from. You know, when people ask me there, I was like, Rob, I self-sabotage. I'm not doing this thing. Once again, the very first thing I go to is, what are you afraid of? So when you find yourself in this situation, like, I want to be more discipline. I want to take more action. I want to create the life of my dreams. Why am I always sitting on the couch? Why am I not doing what I want to be doing? The first question you should ask yourself, take out a pen and paper is, what am I afraid of? You know, and it can look obvious sometimes, I'm afraid of the fear of failure, or I'm afraid of rejection.

Starting point is 00:04:27 But it can also kind of sneak in in like sneakier ways, like perfectionism. Oh, I'm just a perfectionist. No, you're not. Everybody's a perfectionist. Perfectionism is a mask that you wear for some sort of fear. So you might say, oh, I'm not doing this because I'm a perfectionist. No, no, no. What's the fear behind your perfectionism?

Starting point is 00:04:46 Oh, I'm not doing this because I'm, I procrastinate. No, no, no. You're procrastinating for a reason. What are you afraid of? Oh, I'm just a people pleaser. No, no, no. What are you afraid it's going to happen? You got started thinking about this. Oh, I research a lot. I overplan. No, you don't. You're afraid of something. What the hell are you afraid of? It is time for you to develop a extra level of self-awareness so you can actually start to work through these things. You can't change something that you're not aware of because your brain is wired to avoid anything that might create some sort of risk. even if it's an imagined risk. And in most cases, the risk that you are imagining is completely imagined. It's not real. It's not something that's actually going to happen in real life. And so your brain

Starting point is 00:05:34 is a protection mechanism. And one of the ways it protects you is by trying to predict the future. Like your brain is always trying to predict the future. It wants to predict the future because if it can predict the future, it can figure out ways to keep you safe. But the problem with that is that it will almost always predict the future from a place of fear. And that's why you're afraid of failure or you're afraid of criticism or embarrassment or other people's opinions or whatever it might be. It's all brought into your mind by your subconscious as trying to keep you safe. Oh, you might fail. You might get criticized. You might be embarrassed. You might have other people's opinions. You might become unlovable. Whatever it says. And it does it to keep you in the same place.

Starting point is 00:06:19 because it thinks if you're in the same place you'll be safe because I know that where I am right now I'm safe it might not be the life that I want but I know I'm safe I'm alive I have food in my belly my brain is going anything outside of this thing that we already have is dangerous because we can't be sure that you won't die once again your conscious mind knows that you won't die from starting a business or from asking that person out or whatever it might be or sending the stupid email but your brain once again it's always trying to protect you. So if you've ever had like, and this is like can go even deeper, right? So if you have ever like had a moment where you did decide to take action and you did end up

Starting point is 00:07:02 getting some sort of pain, like you spoke up and then you were ashamed for speaking up or, you know, you got on stage of your presentation, you faced your fears and then you felt like you screwed it all up or you looked like an idiot or people laughed at you. You know, or you like, yeah you like tried something and failed publicly then your brain is going to log that memory as a survival lesson and that hurt that you feel it's going to remember because you don't want to feel hurt again and so that's where all of this self-sabotage comes from not because it's trying to sabotage you but because it's trying to protect you so the goal here isn't to eliminate your fear you will never get rid of your fear just so you know you just learn how to work with your fear so it's not to eliminate

Starting point is 00:07:46 fear, it's to become self-aware and diagnose in the moment. Okay, I'm not taking action. I want to take action. Why am I not taking action? Get out your pen and paper. Actually put your brain onto a piece of paper so you can visually see it and start to work through it as if it's a complex math problem, right? What am I afraid of? I'm afraid of X, Y, Z. What are the chances of that actually happening? That's probably pretty low. Okay, if I'm going to look at the worst that could happen, let's also look at the best that could happen. What's the best thing that could happen? All right, let me plan out what could actually happen. Could be good. And then you ask yourself, what's the smallest action that I can take right now that's in the right direction? Simple. What's the

Starting point is 00:08:29 smallest action that I can take right now that's in the right direction? And so you have to understand, and we will be right back. And now, back to the show. Like, if I were to give you a complex math problem, like, you know, not even like super complex, but like 24 times 104. Most people who have, you know, gone through and done math and, you know, multiplication when they were in middle school or in elementary school could take those numbers, put them together, and figure them out with pen and paper. But it'd be pretty hard for most people to do it in their head. Your brain is a million times more complex than that math problem. And you're trying to figure yourself out in your own head. Like, just please get a pen and paper and put all of your thoughts and all of your

Starting point is 00:09:09 fears and all of your worries on a piece of paper and start to work through them so you can become more self-aware. So that's the first thing holding you back. The second thing is your identity, your beliefs of like, oh, I'm not that type of person. And this one's very subtle. Most people don't really even notice it, but it really runs a show in a lot of ways. If you believe deep down that, oh, I'm not a finisher, or I'm just really not a healthy person, or I'm not an entrepreneur or I'm just not somebody who follows through or, you know, I'll always be fat or I'll always be poor, whatever it might be. Then guess what? Your actions will subconsciously protect that identity. So you will only take actions long term that line up with who you think you

Starting point is 00:09:57 are, even if it's working against you. And in most cases, it is working against you, right? Because if you're trying to do something that you've never done before, to do something amazing, to grow a business, to make more money, to lose more weight, you have no proof that it's possible for you to do that, or that you even can do it, or that you're the type of person that can get it done. You realize that? And so why does it do this? Why would our brain want to hold us back from creating an even better identity and even better life? Because your brain values consistency over growth. It's more comfortable with being right about who you are than risking being someone new. Because being somebody new, once again, what does that mean? It's unknown, which brings the

Starting point is 00:10:48 fear back in again. And now, oh my gosh, the unknown. Even though I want to be somebody greater, I want to be a, I want to make a million dollars. I want to be somebody who's a millionaire. I've never been a millionaire. I don't know what that's like. That's not someone I've ever been. That's unknown. What do I have to do to do to get this? there. What do I do once I get there? What if I lose it all? The unknown, once again, is now dangerous. So now it's identity and it's fear that's both working against us. Now you see why it's really important to get a pen and paper out? Now you've got to become very self-aware. So, you know, when you try to take action, your inner narrative whisper is like, hey, this isn't you. You always

Starting point is 00:11:24 give up. You've never been successful at anything you've done. You're not the type of person who actually follows through. Like just stay in your lane. You're not this type of person. And the truth of all of it is this. The action has nothing to do with who you've been. It's always about who you're becoming. But your brain is always going to the past and looking about at who you've been. And you can't wait to feel like a different person before you act.

Starting point is 00:11:54 You can't. You will stay the same person forever if you're waiting to feel like a different person. no you act and you eventually become a different person and then your identity shifts to match the evidence do you see that so let me say it again you can't wait to feel like a different person what you have to do is you have to act differently and do things differently than you ever have which feels unsafe which feels unknown fine do it anyways but if you act long enough in a different direction you will eventually start to become a different person. And as you become a different person, then your identity shifts to match the evidence that it now has that you are a different person. So if you want to be a confident

Starting point is 00:12:37 person, then take one scary action after another. If you want to be a disciplined person, follow through once, even when it's uncomfortable, and then do it again, and then do it again, and try to follow through on all the small things you possibly can in your life. Don't wait until you're ready. You do something different than you've ever done before. And over time, you prove to yourself that you are somebody different and all of the small repeated reps. So that's number two. And the third reason why you're not taking action. You're not a disciplined person is because you're focused on the cost of action when you should be focused on the cost of inaction. If you're trying, like if you're not taking action, it's usually because you're hyper aware of the cost of action, all the effort

Starting point is 00:13:20 that it's going to take to take that action. But you're completely ignoring the cost of staying stuck. this is a difference between the cost of action the cost of inaction the cost of inaction the cost of inaction you probably don't even notice because you're focusing on right now you're not focusing on long term the cost of inaction is way more destructive long term everything in this life has a cost taking action has a cost not taking action has a cost the cost of inaction is much much more than the cost of action let me give a couple of examples right let's say that you want to start a business or change your career, whatever it might be. Cost of action, it's a lot of hard work. You might fail publicly. You might get criticized by other people. You might launch your business

Starting point is 00:14:06 and it might be a flop. You might lose some stability. You might lose your steady paycheck. You're going to feel like an imposter every single day. Those are some of the cost of actions. The cost of inaction, though, you stay in a job that slowly drained your soul. You watch somebody that's way less talented with you, but has more courage, do what you've always dreamed of. You spend the next decade wondering, what if?

Starting point is 00:14:32 You know, well, what if I did that? You teach your kids what it looks like to settle. Guess what? They'll probably do the same thing. You lose self-trust in yourself. See how the cost of inaction is way worse than the cost of action? Relationships, right?

Starting point is 00:14:48 The cost of action? You might have to have a really tough conversation with somebody. you might have to set boundaries from somebody or walk away from somebody you might have to shake things up in your relationship that's your typical comfort zone that's the cost of action the cost of inaction you might have to stay in a relationship where you feel invisible forever you might never feel the love that you truly deserve you end up abandoning your truth to avoid upsetting somebody else you keep giving energy to people who don't respect you you forget what intimacy like really truly feels like. And then you might start to think over time like maybe, maybe this is all that I'm

Starting point is 00:15:23 worthy of. Cost of inaction, way bigger than the cost of action. Let's say like mental and emotional health, right? The cost of action, you might need to face pain that if you've buried in trauma, you've buried your entire life. You might have to go to therapy. Therapy might feel raw. It might feel vulnerable and uncomfortable. Healing yourself might disrupt your normal. you might lose some relationships you once tolerated right that's the cost of action the cost of inaction you're going to carry emotional weight with you that was never yours in the first place forever you might keep pretending that you're fine while slowly unraveling inside you might wonder why happiness feels like something that it's just for other people right so the next time you catch yourself spiraling into

Starting point is 00:16:08 something like what if this goes wrong like you got to ask yourself the question what will it cost me if don't take action. Like you're looking at the cost of action, you've got to pivot and change your perception to the cost of inaction. That single question can change your perception. What really is at stake here? Because once again, there's a cost of everything. There's a cost of taking action. There's a cost of inaction. You know, if you're 50 pounds overweight, there's a cost of action. There's a lot of, of really hard things you're going to have to do to lose those 50 pounds. But if you keep those 50 pounds on for the next 20 years, 30 years, well, the cost of inaction is way, way greater on what it's going to take away from

Starting point is 00:16:52 your life if you don't lose those 50 pounds. So you've got to just give yourself permission to start. You've got to give yourself permission to start ugly in anything you do. Like your brain thinks that you probably think this too, that you need to be motivated first. But motivation is a byproduct of starting. And so what I always say to people is just start ugly. Don't wait for something to be perfect or something to be nice. Like just what I always tell people who are in my coaching programs, it up and figure it out. Just be okay with screwing everything up. No big deal. I'm just trying to figure out what works and what doesn't. If you're waiting for the right feeling, you're not going to take any action. And so you have to just start before you feel ready. Another real quick hack that

Starting point is 00:17:30 I want to give you is this. Actually, a couple of quick hacks. Number one, go by the five minute rule. Tell yourself, I'm just doing this thing for five minutes. Whatever that small action is in the right direction, I'm just doing this for five minutes. That's it. It tricks your brain into lowering its threat alarm. And once you're in motion, momentum usually takes over. And then last thing I'll say, and I've said this many times in the podcast, is if you're also trying to take action, like, create an action safe environment. Like make action in the right direction feel as frictionless as possible. Put your gym shorts next to your bed, block social media before you go onto a task, turn your phone off and put it into another room. You know, if the gym is 25 minutes away and

Starting point is 00:18:08 Instagram is two seconds away, guess where your brain's going to go to? Yeah, so you've got to make taking action the direction you want to go frictionless and taking the wrong action, you've got to try to build more friction there. So that is how you get yourself addicted to taking action and being more disciplined. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram stories. Tag me at Rob Dial Jr., R-O-B-D-A-L-J-R. And if you want to dominate your 2026 goals, I created a 30-minute video that you can get for free. All you have to do is press play.

Starting point is 00:18:38 And in those 30 minutes, you will figure out all of your goals for 2026 and the exact plan that you need in order to achieve those goals. If you want to get that lesson absolutely free, go to goalslesson.com. Once again, goals with an s lesson.com. And with that, I'm going to leave you the same way. Leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you. And I hope that you have an amazing day.

The Mindset Mentor - How to Trick Your Brain into Liking Discipline

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