The Mindset Mentor - Listen to Your Pain

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast, please do me a favor, give us a rating and review. However you listen to us, the more positive rating and reviews that we get, the more that those platforms show this podcast to people who have never listened to it before, and the more that more people are able to find this, and this podcast is able to grow, and we're able to help more people. So if you would give us a rating and review, I would greatly appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. Today, we're going to be talking about your pain, and I'm actually going

Starting point is 00:00:40 to teach you, number one, why pain is a good thing, and number two, I'm actually going to teach you, number one, why pain is a good thing. And number two, I'm also going to teach you how to actually use your pain and to listen to your pain to create the life that you want to, okay? Because most people think that pain is a bad thing. When I say the word, if I were to go to somebody and say, do you want some pain? Nobody's going to say yes, right? They're all going to say no. And so pain, when you feel pain, like if you, let's talk about physical pain first. If you feel physical pain, that pain is just a message to your brain. It's a message that your brain is receiving to stop doing what you're doing, to make a change, to pay attention to the pain and to do something different. So I'll give you an example.

Starting point is 00:01:25 Yesterday, I was trying to cook something. And for those of you guys that don't know, I am a absolute terrible cook. I don't cook anything well. But I was warming something up inside of the oven. And I had my little glove on and it was all cool. And I took it out and I was moving the thing around that I was supposed to move around. I wasn't paying attention. And my thumb and my forefinger both went, the thing started to shift the pan that it was in. And I grabbed it with my thumb and forefinger real

Starting point is 00:01:53 quick. And it was like, it was like a half of a second and immediately pain shot up through my fingers and into my arm and into my brain. And I was like, oh shit, I can't believe that I just did that. Right? That's pain. And that is a message going from my fingertips to my brain saying, do something different. You need to take immediate action because there is pain right here. And if you don't change it, it will only become more painful. That makes sense, right? It makes a whole lot of sense. If you're sitting down and you're working for a long time, as a lot of us tend to do, and your back starts to ache and you're like, oof, my lower back.

Starting point is 00:02:38 I think I need a backiotomy, right? Your back kind of hurts. What is that pain telling you? Your pain's telling you, dude, get up, move, get moving. You're not supposed to be sitting for so long. And so that's a message from your lower back to your brain, do something different. Don't just stand here. Don't just stay here. Get up, move around, do something different. If you are walking and you're walking, you just got back from the beach and you're still at the beach, you're about to walk to your car, you're barefoot. Of course, you're barefoot because you got sand all on your feet, right? And you're

Starting point is 00:03:05 walking back to your car at the beach and your feet, you get like 15 steps in. And then immediately you're like, oh shit, I didn't realize how hot the cement is. And you feel pain at the bottom of your feet. And now you're in the middle of the parking lot. What is that pain telling you to do? It's telling you to get off of the parking lot. It's telling you to put your shoes back on. It's telling you to run to your car or to run back to the sand to do something different than you are currently doing. That's all pain is. Pain is a messenger for you to understand to stop doing what you're currently doing. But pain can also be besides just physical pain. As a human, we can experience many types of pain. We can experience emotional pain. We can

Starting point is 00:03:52 experience the physical pain. We can experience sadness. We can experience worry, frustration. And you have to ask yourself, if you have worry, pain, frustration, anxiety. What is that pain trying to tell you? Now, you might be thinking, okay, if I have anxiety around something, it's telling me that I shouldn't do that thing. Oh, no, no, no, not necessarily. It might be telling you that the way that you're viewing that thing is fearful and completely incorrect. You actually need to change the way that you're viewing that thing. But all of those, worry, pain, frustration, anxiety, are telling you in some sort of way to physically, mentally, emotionally stand up and get your ass moving, to go in a different direction, to do something different than you

Starting point is 00:04:37 are currently doing. Stop doing what you've been doing and do it different. That's what the pain is trying to tell you. Do something different. Change. Because the same way that if I were to keep my fingers on that hot pan for longer, the longer that I hold it, the more pain I'm going to be in in the long run. Hmm. Interesting, isn't it? So you start thinking about like, oh, I'm feeling pain. I'm feeling worry or sadness around my relationship. Maybe that's telling you to either do something different with the way you guys communicate with each other, the way you interact with each other, or maybe it's telling you, hey, it's actually time to do something different as far as like do something different with your relationship and

Starting point is 00:05:22 get a new relationship or be by yourself. I don't know what it's telling you because I don't know your life circumstance, but all it's telling you is what is happening right now is not okay and it needs to change. And the longer that you do not change whatever you feel in that quote unquote pain around, the more painful it will end up being in the long run. It will only get worse if you prolong the pain. You just got to stop doing it. So are you getting the message? Are you getting the message of something needs to be different, to stop doing what you're doing, to make a move, to do something completely different? It is, in my opinion, this is the way that I see it. It is God or the universe or something that is out there telling you change.

Starting point is 00:06:06 Change now or it's going to be more painful later. You've heard me, if you've been listening to me long enough, of the idea of the feather, the brick, and the truck, right? It's like the universe speaks to you very quietly. It's like a whisper. It's like a little feather just tickling you on the back of the neck. You kind of feel it, but you have to be really paying attention to notice it, right? And I believe that all of us are getting messages about what we should and shouldn't be doing all day long. But the problem is we're just not quiet enough to actually let those messages come through and to concentrate on those messages. Or you got the message to come through, but you're ignoring it because it's like, oh, I don't know about that. That doesn't line up with my vision of what I'm supposed to be doing. And so you get the feather

Starting point is 00:06:48 and the universe will kind of speak to you that way. And it's a whisper and it's a whisper. And then it gets a little bit louder if you don't listen for a while. You don't listen for a year, two years, then it comes with a brick. It'll smack you upside the head with a brick. Then are you paying attention? And then if you don't pay attention, you're just still not listening, still not listening, still not listening. It's going to be a truck and it's going to run you over. And that's the point that you don't want to get to. And I learned this from one of my friends who told me about his father used to always say this. And his father was a guy who was in jail for years and years and years, came out of jail. And he said he could notice

Starting point is 00:07:21 in his lifetime before he ever went to jail, that it was like the feather, the brick, the truck. And he would start to, you know, he got arrested when he was younger and got off or was in jail for just a few days when he somehow got off and then got a little bit worse, a little bit worse, a little bit worse. And he knew that what he was doing, he needed to do something differently, but he didn't do it differently. He continued to keep going. And then what happened?

Starting point is 00:07:44 He got ran over by the universe. The truck ran him over. He was in jail for like seven years. And so it's the example of, are you listening to the messages that are coming through? Because pain is a message. Inspiration is a message. Your energy, if you feel a lot of energy towards something, is a message to follow that energy. Pain is a message. It's a message that where you are is not right. It's a message to what you're doing is not what you're supposed to be doing. And so many people feel the pain and they ignore it. They, yeah, no, but they have this job and they hate their job. But they're like, yeah, but I mean, I went to school for accounting. I've been an accountant for seven years. What am I supposed to do now? I'm 37 years old. I've been doing this for now for so long.

Starting point is 00:08:28 I don't want to be doing this, but I'm kind of just stuck. And because of that, it gets more and more painful. It becomes harder and harder to get yourself up, get yourself dressed, get yourself to feel even good on the way to work, and it becomes more and more and more and more and more painful. Stop listening to yourself. And so it's not just the physical pain that I'm speaking about, but it's also the emotional pain. When you think about your relationships, when you think about your friendships, you've got to start asking yourself, what messages have I been getting that I'm just kind of ignoring, that I'm not paying attention to? There's also intellectual pain, the pain of not living

Starting point is 00:09:05 your purpose, the pain of working a job that you don't mind. I even hate your job, but it's just not fulfilling. It doesn't feel like the thing you're supposed to. It's okay. It's pretty good. Actually, job's pretty good, but it doesn't feel right. No, but I can pay my bills. Oh, but I've been doing this for so long. It's the pain of not doing. It's the pain of knowing that you're with the wrong person. That can be an emotional and intellectual pain. It's the pain of not doing. It's the pain of knowing that you're with the wrong person. That can be an emotional and an intellectual pain. It's the pain of knowing that you're wasting your life doing something that you don't want to be doing when you feel pulled somewhere else.

Starting point is 00:09:35 And it's a small, dull pain. It's not the worst pain in the world. It's not something that's completely going to debilitate you and you won't be able to, at this point, not going to completely debilitate you. But it's something that gets a little bit louder and a little bit louder and a little more painful, a little more painful. And it's not just like one week, it's not painful. The next week, it's extremely painful. It's like slowly, but surely it starts to get more and more painful. I remember when I was, just as an example, when I was working my last job that I worked before I left and started my

Starting point is 00:10:05 own business and the podcast and all this stuff, I remember I was making way more money than somebody at my age should have been making at that time. I wasn't working hard. I was working from home. So I was able to be at home and not work really hard and hang out with my dog and all this stuff. And I read a lot of books during the day, but I could feel the only way to describe it is I could feel my soul slowly starting to die. And it wasn't like I woke up one day and then the next day was just way worse. It was like, best way to describe it in my head, the visual that I'm seeing, it was like, if you take one of those little cubes of salt and you put it inside of water and it just slowly dissolves. It was like all of me, my soul, my purpose was just slowly dissolving into this thing that I was waking up

Starting point is 00:10:52 and doing every single day. That's an example of what I mean by it. And I think so many people, like I know people that are in their 60s that have been doing something that's been soul crushing for 40 years and they're just numb. They're just numb to their job. They're numb to their family. They're numb to the world. They're numb to their own happiness. They're just numb because they have learned instead of actually feeling the pain and making a difference, I'm going to numb myself. I'm going to dull everything down because you can't dull down the lows, the pain, and make the pain and numb that and not numb the highs as well. I believe, under my opinion, that the universe is always speaking

Starting point is 00:11:31 to you. It's always coming through. It's always coming through. But the question is, are we allowing ourselves to be silent enough to get those messages to come through? Are we doing meditation? Are we sitting down with pen and paper and journaling through what we want our life to be? Are we trying to actually just be in some silence versus always, always, always being stimulated by something in this universe? And, you know, if you think about it, with the example of the feather, the brick, the truck, you can think back to your life, I'm sure. There's many of you out there listening that can think back to certain aspects of your life where you didn't listen and it got stronger and stronger and stronger. And then eventually

Starting point is 00:12:15 you got hit by a truck or you got smacked in the face with a brick before you did something. And it becomes, it can be very drastic. Your job, you can be fired from the job. So many people got that in 2020, fired from a job that they hated. And then they had this free time, this time to kind of self explore. And some people self explored and completely made a difference, but some people self explored and then just went right back to the same thing. It was your opportunity to make a change or you lose a loved one or you just wake up one day and you realize that you're completely unconscious in the life that you're living. Don't wait until you're either hit by a truck and

Starting point is 00:12:50 definitely don't wait until you're hit by a brick and definitely don't wait until you get run over by the truck. And it's not something that the feeling of this is not something that should paralyze you. When you feel the pain, it's not something to paralyze you and make you stop. It is a message that you have to do something different. It's a message that maybe you should start thinking and listening and having some quiet time and being like, what do I want in this life? And actually, what's funny about it is that most people, actually, it's not funny at all. Most people don't know what they want in their life. They haven't asked themselves that question. And to ask themselves that question becomes very tough because they're like, I don't know the answer because I've never actually paid attention to what I want. I've always done what I thought

Starting point is 00:13:35 I was supposed to do. I've always done what society told me to do, what my parents told me to do. And so to ask themselves that question is a little bit scary and to start to go through. And the beautiful thing about it is this, is I've said this many times because I've gotten many emails of like, Rob, your podcast was so inspiring. I walked into my job and quit. And I'm like, shit, that's great. But also at the same time, like, I don't want you to be out on the streets. I want you to be smart about everything that you do. So if you do feel like there is a transition, if you feel like you're getting messages that you've been looking past, the thing that I really want you to do more than anything else is to take a step back,

Starting point is 00:14:12 reflect, journal through, and say, what am I being called to do? And if you are being called to like quit tomorrow, okay, if that's what feels right to you. But what I would really like is for you to figure out some sort of way to transition out of what you're doing. If you feel called to leave your job, can you transition out of it over time and be able to still pay your bills? And instead of leaving today, leaving in a year or something like that. Same thing if you're in a relationship. If you're being called to leave the relationship now, okay, do that. But if you've got kids, if you've got a family, you've got a house, you've got a house, you've got all that stuff, maybe what it's requiring is for you to actually have an open conversation with the person that you're in a relationship with, and maybe they're feeling the

Starting point is 00:14:53 same way. And maybe there is a transition to either transition out of the relationship or to transition the relationship in the way that both of you guys are showing up. So the real thing I want you to start asking yourself is, are you getting messages? And which I believe the answer is yes, you're always getting messages. But are you listening to those messages? Are you feeling a little bit of the pain, a little bit of the worry, a little bit of anxiety, a little bit of frustration, and you don't know what to do with it or where it's coming from? If so, take a step back. Take a weekend off. Go to rent an Airbnb outside of town and just go there and sit in some silence and put your phone away and journal and think about what you want for your

Starting point is 00:15:30 life and figure out the direction that you actually feel pulled to go to. Not the way that you've been pushing yourself to go, but the direction you're feeling pulled towards. Because pain and those messages are always coming through just the same way that I burnt my two fingers yesterday. It was a message for me to do something different, to stop doing what I'm doing. Anytime you're getting that pain coming through, it is a message to do something different and to stop doing what you're doing. Ultimately, you need to take the step back and figure out what the next best step is for you, what you need to stop doing, and then what you need to start doing in order to create the life that you want. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you

Starting point is 00:16:07 love this episode, please share it on your Instagram stories and tag me in it. Rob Dial Jr. R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. I love going through and seeing all of you guys. I don't share every single one of them, but I do see every single one of them of where you guys are. I always love seeing screenshots or some of you guys are at the gym listening to it, or some of you guys are on a walk listening to it, or you listen guys are on a walk listening to it or you listen to it with your kids. So if you would put up a picture or screenshot, however you are listening to it and tag me in it,

Starting point is 00:16:31 Rob Dial Jr., I'd greatly appreciate it just so I could see what's going on in your lives and be able to connect to the guys. And I'm gonna leave it the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.

The Mindset Mentor - Listen to Your Pain

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