The Mindset Mentor - Pain vs Suffering

Starting point is 00:00:00 Do you want to know the top 10 books that I recommend that you read this year that will make the biggest impact on your life? I've read hundreds of personal development books and I made a list for you of what I feel are the 10 best ones that you can read. To get this list for free, go to mwfmotivation.com slash book list and download it there. All right, I'll get you the podcast right now. and download it there. All right, I'll get you the podcast right now. Welcome to the MWF Motivation Podcast, one of the top-rated motivational podcasts in the world.

Starting point is 00:00:38 Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I come out with a short, to-the-point, no-BS podcast designed to transform you from who you are today into who you want to be. There's no fluff here, just life-changing content. My name is Rob Dial, and the podcast starts now. Welcome to today's episode. If you have not yet done so please subscribe to us however you listen to us today what I'm going to be talking about is suffering in pain pain and suffering which we always think kind of go hand in hand but I'm gonna give you a quote from Buddha that I hope will change your mind on that suffering is not holding you you are holding suffering let me say that again suffering is not holding you you are holding suffering so Let me say that again. Suffering is not holding you. You are holding suffering. So this is how I try to live my life is understanding this concept. If you are alive,

Starting point is 00:01:33 it is a guarantee. Something at some point in time, bad, something bad will happen to you eventually in your life. There's no way around that. And we all know someone who has had something happen to them, something bad happened to them, and it changes them forever. We all know someone who's had something bad happen to them and it changes them for the worse. Like somebody dies, somebody breaks up with them, something happens, they lose their job, and they just spiral out of control. Something goes wrong, right? They just allow it to change their life completely. We also know people though that have had terrible things happen to them and it changes their life for the good, right? Some people, they change their life for the good. Some people,

Starting point is 00:02:16 this terrible thing happens and they realize that they want to have something more from their life. Some people have something bad happen to them and it changed their life for the bad. They become cynical or negative or depressed. Here's the thing. Pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice. Let me say that again. Pain is inevitable. You will have something painful happen to you in your life. If you have not had a painful experience, I guarantee you there's a pretty good chance that you won't get to the end of your life without something painful happening to you. Pain is 100% going to happen to you, but suffering is a choice. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is a choice. Pain is that painful experience. So I could give, let me give you a little bit of a definition, I guess, if I could. Painful is, pain is a painful experience. Something that happened to you that you wish did not happen. Something bad. Somebody breaks up with you. Somebody dies.

Starting point is 00:03:10 Something like that happens. That's a pain that happens. It's going to happen. Suffering is allowing that pain to linger, allowing it to fester longer than it needs to, right? Suffering is not holding you. You are holding on to suffering. Now, I know some of you might be listening to that and you might say, you know, but you don't understand though, but this has happened in my life. My parents screwed me up in this way, or this person screwed me over. You know, that person died. This happened or that happened. Someone treated me badly. Someone passed away. Someone screwed me over. Yes, that happened. But that is the past, right? If it happened in the past, it's the past. The past

Starting point is 00:03:53 has absolutely no right to dictate the way you feel in the present and what you do in the future. The past has no right to dictate the way that you feel in this present moment or to actually what you're going to do with your life in the future. It's all about the meaning that you give to something. I'll give you an example with me. If you've listened to my podcast for a while, you probably know my father passed away when I was 15 years old. He was an alcoholic and he passed away from being an alcoholic when I was 15 years old. He was an alcoholic and he passed away from being an alcoholic when I was 15 years old. And there's basically two different paths I think I probably could have taken in that, right? The victim or the victor is the way I always think of it.

Starting point is 00:04:33 The victim or the victor. I could have let that ruin my life, right? I come from a city that has the number one opiate overdoses in all of Florida and one of the highest in the United States. I could have gone down that path, right? The victim is allowing that pain to hold me back. The victor is using that pain to propel me forward. So are you playing the victim card? Did somebody break up with you? Did someone screw you over? Did somebody die? It's okay to be sad. It's okay to mourn when someone dies, but continue to carry that suffering that you're just keeping with you and keeping with you. And it feels like a, like you're just carrying a backpack with a hundred pounds. And it's just like, no matter what you do, it's always in the back of your head and it influences everything that you do, right? If you're walking down the street with a hundred pound

Starting point is 00:05:35 backpack, it's going to change the way and everything you do. It's going to change the way you walk. It's going to change the way that you talk, the way you breathe, your physiology, everything's going to change it. That's exactly what holding onto pain and actually making suffering does. It changes and influences every single thing that you do. The past has no right to change your present. Understand that whatever happened to you, it changes your life in a good way or in a negative way. But you are in charge of the meaning and the power that you give to that thing that happened to you. I always tell people that the worst day of my life

Starting point is 00:06:13 was the day my father passed away. The best day of my life was the day my father passed away. It's the same day, right? Why was it the worst day of my life? Obviously, that's pretty obvious. Why was it the best day of my life? Because I decided, learned at that point in time, Holy crap. He was the first person that I ever knew that died. And I realized, Holy crap, like this is, this is real. I'm going to do this one day. I'm going to die in some sort of way. Am I going to look back and look at his,

Starting point is 00:06:39 I looked at his life and saw, you know what? It was wasted potential. He was, my grandparents, who are some of the smartest people I've ever known, say that my father was the smartest person they've ever met in their entire life. And I thought to myself, that was wasted potential, right? That was wasted potential. That was a wasted life in some sorts of way. In some sort of way, right? But I'm not going to allow that to happen to me. I'm not going to allow that to be what I do. I'm not going to allow myself to have a wasted life. So maybe the point of his life was to create me to show a wasted life

Starting point is 00:07:17 so that therefore I don't do the same. I don't know. I'm not in charge of this. I'm just going with the flow of whatever this life takes me through. But I'm not going to give that event the power that it doesn't deserve. I'm not going to allow that event to hold me back. I'm going to make it propel me forward. Why am I so passionate about what I do? Why does everybody think that I'm yelling whenever I'm so passionate? Whenever I'm doing these episodes or videos, when I have videos go viral on Facebook, it's the best thing ever because I

Starting point is 00:07:47 get to see like the whole human experience and people are like, dude, chill out. Why would smile a little bit? And it's like, I can't, I just get in the zone where I just, everything flows out of me. And I'm just so intense because I believe in it so much that it's like smiling doesn't even cross my mind because I'm just trying to get this information, these words out of my face so quickly as it's coming through my mind, right? And so the reason why it is that way is because of the fact that I'm so passionate about trying to help other people live the life that they want to because I've seen a life wasted. And I know that the power that I'm going to give that is the power to propel me forward to make sure other people don't waste their lives as well.

Starting point is 00:08:29 So if you've had something painful happen to you, if you haven't, or if you have, doesn't either way, don't allow that to hold you back. Know that there's a pretty good chance that something painful will happen to you in the future. Someone's going to break up with you. Someone's going to screw you over. You're going to lose money. Someone's going to die. All of those things. But you have to realize after the pain, the initial pain, the mourning, all of those things, the suffering

Starting point is 00:08:53 is not absolute. It's not needed. It's you that holds on to the suffering, right? Suffering is not holding you. You are holding suffering. So if you liked this episode, please do me a favor, share it with one person that you love. If you're listening to this episode, that means that you're listening to it for free. Could you pay it forward and do me a favor and go ahead and share this with one person that you know and that you love. Another thing you could do, I haven't said this in probably 200 episodes, 250 episodes maybe. If you're listening on iTunes, please do me a favor and go and give my podcast a rating and review. If you give me a rating and review, it actually spikes the iTunes algorithm and makes more people see it. So if you'll go

Starting point is 00:09:35 ahead and give me a rating review on iTunes, I would absolutely 100% appreciate it. Just go in there. It'll take you like 10 seconds. Just click rating review, whatever amount of stars you want to give me, whether that's one star, five stars, whatever it is that you want to do, but please put it down and then give me a quick rating of just say, Hey, this is what I like about the podcast is what I don't like about the podcast, whatever you want, but please do that. So please share this with a friend. And also please go on iTunes and, uh, and do me a favor and click the button that says rating review. Give me a rating review. And, uh, I'm gonna leave you the same the button that says rating review. Give me a rating review. And, uh, I'm gonna leave you the same way.

Starting point is 00:10:07 Leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you. And I hope that you have an amazing day. Well, that's it for today's podcast. If you want the show notes for this episode, they can be found at MWF motivation.com. Also, if you liked this episode, please spread the love and share it with a friend because it's our mission to help as many people as we can. And to keep in touch, you can follow us on Instagram and Facebook. Both handles are at MWFMotivation with no spaces.

Starting point is 00:10:36 Now, you know what time it is. So go out and make your dreams a reality.

The Mindset Mentor - Pain vs Suffering

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