The Mindset Mentor - The 6 Most Important Decisions to Make in Your Life

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast, please do me a favor, go to iTunes or Apple Podcasts and give us a rating and review. The more positive reviews that we get, the more that iTunes says, hey, we should show this to more people, and then the more people that find this. So I would greatly, greatly appreciate if you would take 30 seconds, take out your phone, and give us a rating and review. Today, we're going to be talking about the six biggest decisions that you need to make in your life to create the life that you want to.

Starting point is 00:00:42 And this is super important because I think too many people are really reactive in their life. They're not proactive in saying, this is what I want, this is what I'm working for, and this is what I'm going to get. And today, we're going to be talking about the six biggest things that you need to go through in order to actually figure out what it is that you want. So let's dive into it. Number one, the first thing that you really need to figure out is who you're going to surround yourself with. You become the people that you surround yourself with. You will, if you've ever heard it before, all boats rise to the tide.

Starting point is 00:01:13 Well, if you have friends that are pushing you to be better, you will be better. But if you have friends that have lower standards than you, you will lower your standards to be the same as your friends. You become who you surround yourself with. There's a quote by Sidney Poirier that says, when you go with a walk with someone, something interesting happens unconsciously. Either you adjust to their pace or they adjust to your pace. And this is true.

Starting point is 00:01:37 Either you're adjusting to them or they're adjusting to you. That's just simply on a walk, but it also happens in all areas of your life. Your weight is going to be around the same as then. Your income is going to be around the same as your friends. The way that you take care of yourself, the way that you talk to yourself, your hobbies, your interests, your habits are all going to be very similar to the people that you spend the most time with. And you do this unconsciously. You adjust yourself and your life trajectory based off of the people that are around you completely unconsciously. You adjust yourself and your life trajectory based off of the people that are around you completely unconsciously. So one of the most important decisions that you can make

Starting point is 00:02:10 is who do I want to spend my time with? Like when I look at my friends, I always say like, keep your circle small. When you look at your friends, are they people that inspire you to be better, that want the best for you, that challenge you to push yourself to be the best version of yourself? Because they can either help you rise and raise your standards to be better, or you'll lower your standards to be the same as them. This is one of the things that's really interesting. A lot of people that I've worked with over the years are subconsciously afraid of making money. And the reason why they're afraid of making money is because they feel like they won't fit in with their friends anymore.

Starting point is 00:02:48 They feel like their friends and their family sometimes, they feel like they will defriend them if they make more money than they become more successful. So people actually will dim their light to make sure that they still fit in with the people around them. So when you look at the people that are around you, who can you count on? Who are the people that are pushing you? Are they on the same level as you as to where you're going in life? I always say sometimes, and there's nothing wrong with people, sometimes you spend a little bit less time with some people because you're not going in the same direction. Just because someone's part of your past doesn't mean they have to be part of your future. And so you've got to look at the people around you and say, when I'm around these people, am I inspired to be better? Are we in the same path trajectory

Starting point is 00:03:29 in life? Or maybe I need to move one person out of my top five and move another person into there. As you always hear, your net worth will be determined by your net work. Not just money though. Every single aspect of your life will be dependent upon who you spend the most time with. So the first thing that you want to be very clear about is who you want to surround yourself with. The second thing that you want to get very clear on, that's a very important decision in your life, is where you're going to live. Location, location, location. Some people just want to be by their family. And that's fine if that's what you want. Some people want to grow themselves and they want to grow their businesses.

Starting point is 00:04:10 And sometimes those two things do not line up. A lot of times they don't line up if I'm being honest with you. Sometimes you have to move away to create yourself. I think personally, and this is just my own personal belief, I think that every single person should move away from home, like hours away from home at least, at least for two years of their life. Why is that? Because sometimes you need to go to a new place to discover who you truly are, not who you always have been. I remember when I first moved away for college, the first two weeks were really hard because I had to figure out who I was when I wasn't in a familiar setting. And with me moving, I know that I would not be where I am in my life. I would not

Starting point is 00:04:52 be the same person. This podcast would not be where it is. My business would not be where it is had I not moved away from home. I grew up in Sarasota, Florida, Sarasota, Bradenton area. It's a little bit south of Tampa. Went to school in Tampa, went to USF, and then moved completely to Texas. Austin, Texas, had never been here before. But I would not be the person that I am had I not moved here, had I not met the people that I met,

Starting point is 00:05:16 had I not learned that I could grow a business online and make a podcast and all the stuff that I do now. I don't think I would have been able to do the same thing had I would have stayed in the same place. So there is a very important decision that you need to make. Do you want to stay where you grew up or is there a place that will foster the growth that you want to have in your life a little bit better?

Starting point is 00:05:38 And I'm not saying that you have to move away from home forever. You know, for me, I know that soon enough, I'm going to buy a house back in where I lived and I'll have a house that's there as well as a house here. That's what I'm going to have. And that's something that you could always have as well. So maybe you go, you know what? I'm going to leave where I grew up. But my goal is to have so much success that I can have a house in this place, but I could also have a place where I grew up as well. That's fully possible for you if that's something that you want. And so it is my personal belief that every single person should move away from where they grew up so they can discover who

Starting point is 00:06:08 they truly are. But there's also people around you. Where's the city that's going to make you come the most alive? Where are the people that are going to fit in, that are going to inspire you and go back to number one, are going to be the people that you want to surround yourself with? So that is the second thing is where you're going to live. The third thing is who you're going to marry, right? Or if you're not going to marry, like, are you going to marry? Are you not going to marry? Either is fine.

Starting point is 00:06:32 There's nothing wrong with either one. It's whatever one you want. But what do you want to do is the important thing. Are you going to marry somebody just because you've been in a relationship for a really long time and now you're the right age and it's kind of convenient?

Starting point is 00:06:48 Or are you going to marry someone who's going to grow with you, who's going to push you to be better, who's going to want the best out of you, who's going to make you a better person, make you a better man, make you a better woman? I only want to marry someone that's going to make me better, right? And I make that person better as well. And so you have to figure out who it is that you want to marry. And even if you're not in a relationship right now, if you are in a relationship, is this person a person you could see the rest of your life with? If not, work on that or get out of the relationship. Or number two, what is the person that I'm looking for? Even if you are single, what are the persons you're looking for?

Starting point is 00:07:21 Plan them out, figure out who they are, all of that stuff. And you want what I would think, what I want, this might be what you want as well, is someone who's going to make me better and I can make someone better as well. And so the third most important decision that you're going to make is who you're going to marry. Hey, it's a new year and you deserve a fresh start

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Starting point is 00:09:34 deductions you deserve. So visit TurboTax.com to learn more. You do your thing. They've got your taxes. Intuit TurboTax Live. Fourth most important decision what you're going to make is what you're going to make is what you're going to do for money. Money is very important to some people and for others it's not. And that's fine. Once again, there is no right, there is no wrong. What is right is what you want and what feels the most aligned with you and who you are and your purpose and who you want to become. So money is very important for some people and for some people it's not. What are you going to do for money? You know, for some people,

Starting point is 00:10:08 they want their passion in life to be their paycheck. They want to, like for me, my passion is what I'm doing now. It is also how I make my paycheck. But for some people, it's not that at all. And most people think it needs to be passion and paycheck. It doesn't need to be. Some people want to make their money, work a job, and then when they live,

Starting point is 00:10:28 then they want to live their passion outside of it. Their passion might be mountain biking. It might be helping the world in some sort of way. It might be raising the best children you possibly can. Your passion can be your paycheck, but your passion does not always have to be your paycheck. And so the question you have to ask yourself is, how am I going to make money? Like in my life, how much money do I want to make? What kind of life

Starting point is 00:10:49 do I want? What kind of future do I want? And then what do I need to do in order to make that money and to be able to live my passion in life? So you might realize that the job that you want or the business that you want to create is the thing that you need in order to create the life that you want. But you also might think, you know what? I don't need to start a business. I don't need to work more than 40 hours a week because my passion is XYZ. That has nothing to do with how I make money. So I'm going to make my money. And it might be something that you enjoy just a little bit. Maybe you don't love it, but at least it gives you time and money to pursue whatever your passion actually is. The fourth most important thing that you could do is figure out what you're going to

Starting point is 00:11:30 do for money. The fifth most important thing that you need to figure out is who you want to be and what your values are going to be. Who you want to be and what you want your values to be in your lifetime. Who do you want to be in this life, in this body that you have, in this limited amount of time, in this limited amount of space? Who do you want to be? How do you want to be known? Who's the person that you want to become? It's not more than anything else.

Starting point is 00:12:01 It's not what you want to achieve and what you're doing, but who do you want to be, the being? And you've heard me talk about this in previous episodes. What's more important than what you do in life is who you are, what you become, who you are being, right? You're a human being, not a human doing. Who are you being in this lifetime? And the way I like to think of it is this. I had a really good friend whose dad passed away and he was not a super successful guy. He made way less money than the average person. And I remember going to his funeral about six years ago.

Starting point is 00:12:31 And there were so many people in this funeral that inside of the church, they were sitting, they were standing room only, and there were people outside of it. And I thought to myself, damn, what matters more in this world is not how much money is in your bank account. It's how many people show up to your funeral, right? Because if you have a lot of people show up to your funeral, that means that you did something right in this world. And that's the thing that you want to think about is, you know, if you're thinking about who you want to be in this world, and you're like, I don't know who I want to be though. Okay.

Starting point is 00:13:00 Let me make it a little more simple for you. If you imagine that you've passed away and we're not going to get morbid, but you imagine that you passed away and it is your eulogy and you're watching your eulogy, what would you want people to say about you? Write all of those things down. What would you want people to say at your funeral? What kind of character traits do you want? Oh man, he was so loving. He was giving. He was humble. He was reliable. He was trustworthy. What would you want them to say? And write down all of the things that you would want people to say about you. And then go through it and say, okay, am I all of these things right now? And for some of them, you'd be like, you know what? Giving. Yes, I am giving, but if I'm being

Starting point is 00:13:43 honest, I could be more giving. Okay, cool. Let's build that into who you are. Loving. Oh yeah. I could definitely be more loving with people. Forgiving. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I could definitely be more forgiving. Right. And you go through every single one of you write down every single thing that you want to become. And then you literally look at that and you say that this is what I need to work on today. I need to work on being more loving, work, work on being more giving, more humble, more reliable, more trustworthy. And you get an idea of the person that you need to be by simply thinking ahead to your eulogy and asking yourself, what would I want people to say about me if it was my funeral? And so that's the fifth most important thing is who you want to be

Starting point is 00:14:18 and what values you want to have. And then the last one, the sixth one, which is massive for people, is what you want to dedicate your life to. What do you want to dedicate your life to? What is it? And this is big because a lot of people don't have their life dedicated to anything. They just wake up and they go through the motions. Well, this life isn't about you going through the motions. This life is becoming who you want to become, doing what you want to do, creating what you want to create. you want to become, doing what you want to do, creating what you want to create. What do you want your life to be dedicated to? What is your life currently dedicated to? Is it anything? What do you want it to be dedicated to? If you don't dedicate your life to something,

Starting point is 00:14:55 what's the point? Like really, what's the actual point of life if you're not dedicating it to something? What are you willing to die for? And it could be easy for you. Maybe it's like, I'm going to dedicate my life to being the best possible parent for my children. Great. That's beautiful. And maybe it could be a business, creating a business that makes me enough money so that I can donate $100 million at the end of my life. Cool. Beautiful. Maybe it's a business that goes out and makes an okay amount of money, but it really just helps the world. Or maybe you have a business where you sell a product, you give a product for free to people in need. Maybe it's you work a normal job,

Starting point is 00:15:36 but then you have your free time and you dedicate your life to helping the needy and helping the homeless. Maybe it could be animal rights. What is it that you want to dedicate your life to? What is it that makes it go, you know what? I believe in this thing so much that if I were to die for it, I would see that as something that's worth it. This is something that I want to work on, that I want to dedicate my life to, that I want to see come to fruition by the end of my lifetime. Maybe it's animal rights. Maybe it's human rights. Maybe it's equality. I don't know what it is for you, but what is it that you want to dedicate your life to? This is one of the most important decisions that you'll ever make is what are you

Starting point is 00:16:12 willing to die for? What do you want to dedicate your life to? What's the most important thing for you? So what is it that you want to dedicate your life to? So those are the six things that you need to, six biggest decisions that you need to make in your life. Number one, who you're going to surround yourself with. Number two, where you're going to live. Number three, who you're going to marry. Number four, what you're going to do for money. Number five, who you want to be and what your values are going to be. And number six, what are you going to dedicate your life to? Those are the six most important decisions that you can make. Get out of pen and paper, write them down, figure them out and use that as your guiding light, your North Star as to what it is

Starting point is 00:16:48 that you want to do with your life. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please do me a favor, share it on your Instagram stories and tag me at RobDialJr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. And I'm gonna leave you the same way I leave you every single episode, making it your mission to make someone else's day better.

Starting point is 00:17:04 I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.

The Mindset Mentor - The 6 Most Important Decisions to Make in Your Life

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