The Mindset Mentor - The Biggest Decision of Your Life

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast, and you want some extra tips and tricks inside of your email inbox, go ahead and go to mondayemail.com right now. Once again, mondayemail.com. And I will send you free emails every single Monday with tips and tricks to improve your mindset and also improve your life. Today, we're going to be talking about the biggest decisions that you'll make in your entire life. And in fact, we're going to talk about the six biggest decisions that you'll make in your entire life. I think that, number one, I think you should

Starting point is 00:00:42 take some notes on this. And I think you should actually start to journal through this after this episode or if you want to pause me as we go through it. So the first one, the first biggest decision that you'll make in your entire life is who you're going to surround yourself with. The people that you surround yourself with, your friends, your family, everything. Because you become who you surround yourself with you've heard me say this a million times but you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with so there's an interesting thing if you're going on a walk with somebody something really happens something interesting happens unconsciously either they will adjust to your pace or you will adjust to their pace and just like going on walk, this life that we're on is a walk

Starting point is 00:01:27 and we're going to walk it with some people. And either they're going to adjust themselves to us or we're going to adjust ourselves to them. And when we have four or five or six friends that we hang out with the most, it's pretty obvious once you start to look at your life that you are very similar to your friends. The amount of money that you make, the amount that you work out, the way you take care of yourself, the area that you live in, your hobbies, the way that you talk to yourself, all of those things. You're very similar to your friends in that way. And so the same way that when you go for a walk and you unconsciously match your pace to theirs, you will unconsciously match the pace of

Starting point is 00:02:05 your life, your aspirations, the way you think about yourself, the way you think about the world, you will match them as well. And so this is one of the most important decisions that you ever make in your entire life is the people that are in your life. You will either rise to the standards of people around you or you will lower your standards to people around you. I don't know why it tends to be this way, but for most people in most circles, it's usually they need to lower their standards. I don't know why a lot of people aren't motivated to create the life they want and to create something amazing and to work for it and to become better. But if you're listening to this podcast, I'm going to be honest with you, you're one of the weird ones. I'm one of the weird, we're drinking the Kool-Aid of trying to become better, trying to work

Starting point is 00:02:49 on ourselves, trying to improve ourselves. A lot of people just are not. And so when you're thinking about the circles that you surround yourself with, you want to start thinking about the people who are going to inspire you to be better. They're going to inspire you to think bigger than you currently are. They're going to push you and drive you and motivate you and cheer you along on this path of life. And being around them makes you be like, shit, I need to be better. That's who you want to surround yourself with. The people that make you think, shit, I need to step it up. Not the people who are like,

Starting point is 00:03:20 don't worry about it. You can do it tomorrow. Don't worry about it. Why you got such big goals? That's dumb. Why you listen to those motivational podcasts? That's dumb. Why you reading books? That's dumb. You don't want to hang out with people like that. They're not going to inspire you to be greater. So really, who can you count on in your life to push you to be better? That's what we're talking about with who you surround yourself with. So that's number one. Number two, where you're going to live. One of the huge decisions in your life is where you're going to live. You've heard people say it, location, location, location. Some people want to be by their family. Some people want to grow themselves and to grow their businesses. Sometimes those two things don't line up.

Starting point is 00:03:59 A lot of times they don't line up. For people who grow up in a small town, shit, anybody who grows up in any town, I think that at some point in time, it is my personal belief, this is just my personal belief, that everyone should move away from the place where they grew up at least for a couple years to discover who they are when they're in a different place. Because a lot of times who we are, we become who we need to be based off the people we surround ourselves with, just as I said in the first one, right? So if you've been around the same people your entire life, changing is going to be quite hard. And you might actually be a different person than you think you are once you get away from

Starting point is 00:04:37 that for a little while, for two months, three months, four months, a year. You can always go back to where you grew up. But I think that people need to move away from a little bit and just discover a new life, make some new adventures, meet some new people. I think that that's where growth comes from is moving to a new place is going to get you fully out of your comfort zone. I remember when I moved away when I was 18 years old, I remember the first week it was, I was like, I don't know what I'm doing. I got to go back. I don't feel safe. This isn't right. And then over time I got a little bit better with it. And now I grew up in Florida.

Starting point is 00:05:09 I live in Texas. And so I'm not saying someone has to move away and stay away forever, but just test the waters. What if you moved away from where you grew up? So if we're talking about also the idea of where you grew up versus maybe wanting to grow a business. And I said, sometimes those two don't line up. If I were to stay where I grew up, it would have been really hard for me to grow my business that I currently have. And the reason why is because there's not a whole lot of people in a small town that I grew up in that have businesses like mine. I happen to be lucky where I moved to Austin, Texas, and there happens to be a lot of people who do stuff online. And so when I was first getting into, how do I do this online thing? How do I make money online? I was trying to figure it out and find my feet. I found out

Starting point is 00:05:54 there was a networking group here. And I went to the networking group and was able to actually start meeting people who were making money online, had successful businesses online, and expanded my mindset and my consciousness to, oh, this is fully possible. This person is doing well online. I remember one of the first events I went to, I met a guy that was my age and I was making $0 online. And he had just sold his business for $15 million from online. And I was like, whoa, what the hell? He did over a million dollars in his first 12 months. It made me go, hey, if this guy could do it, I could do it. And that was easy to find here in this city because the city just happened to be conducive for finding people who make money online. Back where I grew

Starting point is 00:06:32 up, that would have been really hard. And so where you're going to live is important. If you do want to stay home and you do want to be close to your family, that's important. Well, you can do that. Do it. But if you do feel like you're kind of stuck and you want to get out of a place that you grew up in, try it for a year. Just try it on like a t-shirt. Maybe you like it, maybe you don't, but at least you get out and you try something different. But start thinking about the future that you want and where living, what would make it, what place could you live in that would make getting to that future easier and get yourself around, as we went over number one, around other people who are also doing that same thing as well, or something in the same vicinity. So that's number two. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Your mind is the most complex thing in the entire universe. Unfortunately, it doesn't come with a

Starting point is 00:07:19 user manual. So when it's not working for you, it's normal to feel stuck. And navigating some of life's challenges can make you feel unsure, whether it's a career change, a relationship, or becoming a parent. Therapists are trained to help you figure out what is causing your challenging emotions and learn productive coping skills, which makes therapy the closest thing to a guided tour of the complex engine called you. Better Help has connected over 3 million people with licensed therapists. It's convenient and accessible anywhere and 100% online.

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Starting point is 00:08:13 endless searching for the right therapist. Learn more and save 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com slash dial. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P.com slash dial. That's betterhelp.com slash dial. Number three, obviously very important is who you're going to marry or if you're going to marry in the first place. Either one is fine. Maybe you don't want to marry somebody. Well, you need to make that decision. Maybe you do want to marry somebody. Okay. Well, what do you want in somebody? Are you going to marry someone because you've been with them for years and you're the right age and you just kind of, you know, your biological clock is ticking and you got to get this show on the road? Or are you going to marry someone because this person is actually probably the biggest decision of your life? I was watching a really successful person give a speech

Starting point is 00:08:59 last week and he was saying that 90% of success is actually finding the right person to marry. Because maybe, if we go back to building a business as an example, maybe you marry somebody who pushes you and wants you to grow businesses and okay with you traveling and going different places. But there also could be somebody who doesn't want you to travel and doesn't want you to leave and doesn't want you to do these things. Like when I first got into a relationship with Lauren, I told her flat out a year, probably into our relationship, I was like, Hey, I am going to have to do a lot of traveling with what I want to do. Like I want to go around the world and give speeches and write books and do book things. And I want you to go with me, but there's going to be times where maybe you don't want to go, but traveling and being out

Starting point is 00:09:41 there is part of who I am. It is something that I love. And she was like, yeah, I fully support that because I can see that that's going to be necessary as well. Cool thing is she had never really traveled before we were together. Now we go traveling all the time. We just got back from Napa last week. And then four weeks before that, we were in Italy for three and a half weeks. 2017, her and I went and traveled all over the world for six months. So you have to kind of start thinking about like, is this person that I'm with, if you're in a relationship, the person that I want to marry that's going to help me become the best version of myself? Are they going to be fully supportive to be who I want to be? Maybe if you want to be a stay-at-home mom or stay-at-home dad

Starting point is 00:10:17 or whatever it is that you, maybe you don't want to grow the business. Well, is your relationship going to be the right relationship to make sure that you are the stay-at-home mom, for instance, and you want to stay home with the kids? Well, is that going to be possible? Do they have the same idea or do they want you to work? Do they want to have kids? What do they want their life to be? And so it's a very important decision. Number three is who you're going to marry. And as I told you, the successful person who's given that speech said 90% of your success, if you're going to be, you know, whatever success it is and what a success means to you is based off of who you're going to actually spend your life with. So that's number three. Number four is what you're going to do for money. Money is very important to some people and to other people,

Starting point is 00:11:01 it's not. So, you know, if we're going back to who you're going to marry, probably a really good conversation is the money conversation. How much money do you want to make? What do you want to do with money? Do you want to travel? Do you want to save? Do you want to buy a big house? Do you want to live in a small place? There are multiple houses. Do you only want to live in one? Do you want to live in townhouse? Do you want to live in a mansion? So that's another conversation. But how are you going to make your money? What are you going to do for money? Some are you going to do for money? Some people, they want to turn their passion into a paycheck. And I will say this, some people can turn their passion into a paycheck, but the vast majority of people

Starting point is 00:11:34 won't be able to, in most cases, be able to make full-time income and fully support off of just their passion. Sometimes they can, sometimes they can't. Is that something that you want to do? And is it feasible for you to turn your passion into a paycheck? Some people just want to make their money and then they want to live their passion outside of the way they make their money. Neither one is right, neither one is wrong, but it's really like, what do you want to do? You're going to spend the majority of your waking hours working somewhere. Please make it be somewhere where you at least enjoy it, where you at least feel some fulfillment and some satisfaction from it. And so neither one is right, neither one is wrong. But I think what's really important is if you're going to spend the majority

Starting point is 00:12:15 of your waking hours working somewhere, you might as well do somewhere where you feel like you're doing good for yourself or good for the world or something that you enjoy. I personally believe that, and I don't think it has to be this way, but I personally believe that it's better to make less money doing something that you love than to make more money doing something that you hate. Because money's not that satisfying, but the way that you feel inside is the most satisfying thing. So neither one's right, neither one's wrong, but what do you want to do for money? thing. So neither one's right, neither one's wrong, but what do you want to do for money? But you have to realize that you need to either create a job or create a business or go and get a job or work for yourself or work for someone else. What do you want to do? Some people want

Starting point is 00:12:57 to work for someone else. Some people want to build their own businesses. Once again, neither one's right, neither one's wrong. It's just what do you want to do? That's a decision that you need to make, okay? So that's number four. Number five, very important decision you make is who you want to be. Essentially, what you want your values to be. Who do you want to be in this lifetime? What do you want to achieve?

Starting point is 00:13:21 Who do you want to be? The way I think about, and the easiest way I think about who you want to be and your characteristics and your values and all that stuff is we're all going to die one day. It's happening. And at your funeral, what do you want people to say about you? Because when you get to your funeral, people are not going to say, oh, this guy had $10 million in his bank account. Oh my gosh, this guy built a business with a thousand employees. No, they're going to say who you were. And so if you're thinking about that, think from the end, if you're sitting down and you're

Starting point is 00:13:49 journaling who you want to be, what you want your values to be, how you want to be known, your characteristics, your traits, all that stuff, what would you like people to say about you at your funeral? And then start building from there. How you acted, how you treated people, were you giving, were you honest, were you humble, all of those things. What do you want them to say about you? What characteristic traits do you want? Who do you want to be? What values do you want to uphold? Oh man, he was so trustworthy. He was so reliable. He was so humble, giving, loving. You could call him up and he'd give you the shirt off his back. Who do you want to be in this lifetime is an extremely, extremely important decision. So that's number five. Number six is what do you want to be in this lifetime is an extremely, extremely important decision.

Starting point is 00:14:29 So that's number five. Number six is what do you want to dedicate your life to? This life can just be a thing where you go through the motions if you want to. But most people usually don't want to just go through the motions. They want to create something with this life of theirs. They want it to be a success. They want to feel like they're doing good in some sort of way. So what do you want to dedicate your life to? If you don't want to dedicate your life to something, what's the point? Really, what's the point? What are you willing to die for? And what I mean by it is it doesn't have to be like, oh, I'm going to build this business and make millions of dollars. That's not what I mean by just, it could be that if that's what you want, maybe there's something that you have decided you do want to dedicate your life to,

Starting point is 00:15:03 It could be that if that's what you want, maybe there's something that you have decided you do want to dedicate your life to, but it could be your children. It could be a business. It could be helping the homeless. It could be helping animal rights. What is it? What is the flag that you're going to put into the ground and say, this is the thing that I stand for above everything else? What do you want to dedicate your life to? Because I think most people feel, a lot of people feel like their life is just this hollow existence. Like they're just going through the motions and they're here and things are happening and blah, blah, blah, and it is what it is. But the reason why is because they don't have something they can dedicate their life to. And so what are you going to dedicate your life to? And what is the most important thing for you to be working towards? And so those are the six biggest decisions that you want to make sure that you get very clear on your life. Number one, who are you going to dedicate your life to and what is the most important thing for you to be working towards. And so those are the six biggest decisions that you want to make sure that you get very clear on

Starting point is 00:15:47 your life. Number one, who you're going to surround yourself with. Number two, where you're going to live. Number three, who you're going to marry. Number four, what you're going to do for money. Number five, who you want to be, what your values are going to be. And number six, what you're going to dedicate your life to. If you can get very clear on those things, you'll create a pretty damn good life. I promise you that. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on your Instagram stories and tag me at RobDialJr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. And once again, if you want to follow the podcast, the podcast Instagram is blowing up. We grew by like 30,000, 40,000 people last month alone.

Starting point is 00:16:26 It is the Mindset Mentor Podcast. Once again, the Mindset Mentor Podcast on Instagram. And once again, I'm gonna leave it the same way. Leave you every single episode. Make it your mission. Make someone else's day better. I appreciate you. And I hope that you have an amazing day.

The Mindset Mentor - The Biggest Decision of Your Life

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