The Mindset Mentor - The Power of Mentorship

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor podcast, the number one mindset podcast in the entire world. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast and you live in the United States or Canada and you want to receive inspirational text messages from me, go ahead and text me right now, 512-580-9305. Once again, 512-580-9305. And I'll just sporadically text you some inspiration as it hits me throughout the week. Today, we're

Starting point is 00:00:38 going to be talking about the importance of having mentors and how mentors, the right mentors in your life will absolutely change your life. No doubt about it. I read a stat years ago, probably about 10 years ago at this point, that said the average millionaire, somebody who has a million dollars in net worth has had no less on average than seven mentors before they become a millionaire. And so when you start to think about a mentor, first off, you start to think about a mentor, first off, let's talk about what a mentor is. What is a mentor? Because you can go out there and you can pay for a mentor or, you know, I can also see coach, like a coach is a mentor in some way. So you can go out there and you could pay for one. You could find one that's a friend and they could be free and all of that. But really what is a mentor? The way I look at it is somebody

Starting point is 00:01:22 who is a mentor is somebody who has applied knowledge in something that you want to get better at. So, you know, even if we just say like, I want to get better at running a business. Well, I can have a business mentor who is successful, more successful than I have. Maybe they've exited a couple of companies, which means that they have knowledge specifically around the thing that I want to get better at, which is business. What also could help with mentors? Maybe I hire a fitness mentor, fitness coach, somebody who is really in shape and is in better shape than I am. They have applied knowledge towards that specific thing and I'm willing to be able to work with that

Starting point is 00:02:00 person or pay that person or work for them for free or whatever it might be in order to get some of that knowledge for them. Now, why is it important to have a mentor? Well, basically what's happened is they've gone down the road of seeing what works, seeing what doesn't, going through trial and error over years. They might've had their own mentors. They might've just screwed it all up themselves and eventually figured it out. But eventually what happened is they got to where you want to go and they can basically hand you the roadmap not physically but they can hand you the roadmap and say this is what you need to do to get to where I am essentially what they do is they collapse time they shorten your learning curve and I don't

Starting point is 00:02:38 know if you're on the same page as me but I am more than willing to pay somebody to teach me the thing that I want to get better at, whether that's business, whether that's coaching, whether that is learning how to play guitar, how to sing better, a fitness coach, a nutritionist coach, somebody who's going to help my wife and I get better and closer in our relationship. So these are people who know something and I'm willing to either pay them or spend time with them or work for them. Or there might be some sort of exchange where I am learning what they know.

Starting point is 00:03:11 And the way I like to think about is this is we had my VP of operations over and her fiance were over this weekend and we were talking about how her fiance, Julian, loves grocery shopping. And I'm like, that's funny. I hate grocery shopping. I try to get in and out as fast as possible. And basically, this is the example that I gave them, is when I walk into a store, I know I need like this thing, this thing, and this thing. And so I will walk up to the very first person who works in that grocery store. And I will say, hey, I need person who works in that grocery store and I will

Starting point is 00:03:45 say, hey, I need eggs. I need bread. I need steak. Where are those things? Okay. Eggs are over there. Steak's over there. Bread's over there.

Starting point is 00:03:53 Cool. Can you take me there? If they're able to, I'll ask them to take me there. A lot of times they just offer to take me there. That is exactly what having a mentor does for you. Is you can go up to him and say, Hey, this is what I want. How do I get there? And not spend time years going up and down the aisles, looking and searching for the thing that you're trying to get out of life. All of that takes time.

Starting point is 00:04:19 And so it's like, you know, the thing about it too, is like, if I walk up to somebody, I'm like, Hey, I need peanut butter. Where's the peanut butter? He's like, the peanut butter is on aisle four. And I go on aisle four, I can look left and right. And I still might not find the peanut butter. And I'm like, Oh, let me turn around. I missed it. Right. We do that too.

Starting point is 00:04:33 That's what life is. And so really the important thing of going up and asking somebody exactly what they know, they know where it is. Why? Because they have been there. They know where it is. They can save they have been there. They know where it is. They can save you time. You don't have to search. You don't have to mess up. You don't have to walk down the wrong aisle. They collapse time. I don't know about you guys. I'll just be honest with you.

Starting point is 00:04:56 I got shit to do. I got things to do. I got people to see. I got a life to create. I want to get there sooner than later. And for somebody who is very frugal, I am willing, more than willing to pay somebody to teach me how to do the thing I want to improve at. And this is what a mentor does. So whatever it is, if you say, if I ask you, what do you want to get better at? You're like, I want to get better at this thing. I guarantee you there is someone in the world who has already gotten to where you want to go with that thing. And I guarantee you, whether they're just a really nice person, they want to teach you for free, or you can work for them for free in some sort of way, or there's some sort of value

Starting point is 00:05:35 exchange or bartering system, or you just say, hey, what would it cost me to pay you to help me with this? Whatever it might be. It's just a quicker way of getting to where you want to go. That's really what it comes down to. Like an example, if you're in California, let's say you're in LA and you want to go to Hawaii, you can take a boat to get there, or you can take a jet to get there, or you can take a kayak to get there. One could take months. One could take hours. to get there. One could take months. One could take hours. A mentor is the equivalent of a jet for traveling. They get you to where you want to go quicker. Is it more expensive to take a boat than it is? I'm sorry. Is it more expensive to take a jet than it is to take a kayak? Yeah, but you save time and time is money. And so mentors collapse time. A mentor is someone who's

Starting point is 00:06:21 done something that you already do, the business, the relationship, money, mindset, body, whatever it is. And the reason why I fully believe in coaches and mentors is because I hired my first mentor when I was 19 years old. I paid somebody $500 a month and he absolutely changed my life. I was 19 years old. This was in 2006. I've looked it up. That's like the equivalent of $750 right now a month at 19. I didn't have the money, but what did I have? I had a credit card and I had a credit card and I had a desire to have a different life. That's what I did have. And he absolutely changed my life. I don't know where I would be had I not hired him. Originally what happened was I had started in a sales company and I knew nothing about sales. I was terrible at sales and I wasn't

Starting point is 00:07:04 making money that I wanted to. And I said, this guy is in the hall of fame in this company that I'm in. I wonder if I can pay him to teach me what he knows. So I'm brand new sales rep learning from someone who's in the hall of fame. Do you teach me sales? Yeah. But more than anything else, he taught me about life. He taught me about psychology because sales is psychology. He helped me with setting goals. He helped me with stop making excuses. He completely changed everything of who I was. And he was successful in the business that I was in. So my question to you is, why don't you just try to learn from the best?

Starting point is 00:07:40 Why don't you try to go up to somebody who is where you want to be and say, hey, what can I do to learn from you? You've got something in your brain. How do I download it? It's kind of like in the matrix where they upload, you know, take all of the information, upload into Neo's brain. That's what we're trying to do.

Starting point is 00:07:57 How can I download all the information from your brain? How can I upload it into my brain? And by hiring this guy, he changed my mindset. He changed my bank account. He changed my bank account. He changed my relationships. He changed my relationship with personal development. Absolutely changed my life in many ways. And so what I try to do is I try to have mentors in as many areas of my life as possible. At this point right now, I have about nine different mentors for different things and I'm willing to pay for it. Now I understand I wasn't always willing to pay for it. So there were times where I had to say, Hey,

Starting point is 00:08:28 you know, maybe I can do this thing for you. I've had mentors before where, you know, I've, I can specifically remember one who helped me when I was brand new in learning marketing and he was really, really good at marketing. I knew nothing about marketing and how to start making products and selling them online. But the beautiful thing was I had just started a podcast and it was growing. This was back in 2015. And I had about a hundred episodes under my belt. I was like six months in at that point in time. And he was thinking about starting a podcast. And we were in a conversation. We met at another person's house and I knew, you know, we had talked and I knew he was a super successful guy killing it in marketing. And, you know, I was like, you know, we were talking and he was like,

Starting point is 00:09:07 yeah, I'm thinking about starting a podcast. And I was like, Hey man, like when we were leaving, I was like, let me get your number. Maybe we could talk about starting a podcast and see if I can help you out. He's like, Oh man, that would be awesome. And then, so what I did, I didn't have money to pay him. I didn't, I was broke at the time. I actually, at that point in time, literally was jobless and trying to start my business. So there was no revenue coming in. So I sent him a text message a couple of days later. Hey man, so great to meet you over at this person's house. You know, when do you want to jam out and I can try to help you with growing your, your podcast? He's like, oh man, that'd be awesome. Can you come over and

Starting point is 00:09:38 talk with me and my girlfriend? Cause they were starting the podcast together. Come over and see us on, on Thursday. Went over on Thursday. I was over their house for like seven hours, right? Didn't ask for anything from him. And what's cool about it is that the law of reciprocity, this isn't the reason why I was doing it, but the law of reciprocity was like, how can I help you? And I was like, man, well, I don't really know about this. This is what I'm kind of thinking about doing. And so I helped him start his podcast and he helped me start with marketing. And now he's a really good friend of mine. Like we've known each other now for eight, almost nine years at this point, I guess. And it just kind of gives you an idea of I didn't have the money to pay him.

Starting point is 00:10:12 So if you're sitting out there like, I don't know how I'm going to pay people to do this. Is there some sort of energetic exchange? Sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes you can find someone that is very successful with what you want to get better at. not all the time, but sometimes you can find someone that is very successful with what you want to get better at. And then just seeing your desire to want to learn, to grow, to improve will make them be like, I want to help this person. I can see it in their eyes. I can notice myself in them. Let me try to help them out. Sometimes that can happen. But what I always say, and this is the thing that people make, make a massive mistake of every single time

Starting point is 00:10:43 is you need to offer to help them first is what I think is really important. The amount of times, like it drives me crazy, the amount of times I get emails from people, they're just like, Rob, love your podcast. How can I get on it? And I'm like, there's no value exchange in that. That is taking is what it is. Hey, I've got something I want to promote. I want to promote my book or whatever it is. How can I get on your podcast? Not how can I help you in any sort of way? And so I would just say, if you want people to be more receptive of it, try to see if you can help them in some sort of way. Put yourself out there. If you don't have money, try to see if you can have some time. Try to see if there's

Starting point is 00:11:17 something, some knowledge you can help them with, right? So for me, like what I do is I teach people how to grow businesses. Why? Because I've already done it and I've messed up all this stuff. I found out what works and what doesn't work. And so someone could spend five years trying to figure it out, or they could just learn from someone like me who runs a $5 million a year business and just get to the peanut butter quicker. Right. And that's kind of what it is. Now, people always ask me a question like, what's the difference between having a paid mentor and what's the difference between having a free mentor? I think that both of them are great i have had many of both but i can give you a little bit of an idea of what the difference is between the two okay free mentors are great

Starting point is 00:11:52 because they're free they don't cost you anything i have many friends in my life who are incredible mentors people who are extremely successful um but you, there's massive benefit to it, but there's quite a few downsides to it as well. So like I have friends that are 10, 15 years older than me and extremely successful in real estate, which is something that I'm trying to get better at. And I'm, you know, I've have my own properties and stuff. So I'm trying to get better at that and trying to learn from them. I don't pay them. You know, we help each other out. We hang out. You know, we can be around each other. They make me hold myself to a higher level. But because of the fact that I'm not paying them, I don't see them every single week. I don't see

Starting point is 00:12:35 them all of the time. And they don't really feel obligated to help me succeed. They want to see me succeed. They will take time out. We'll go get coffee. We'll talk. We'll chit chat, all of that stuff. But I might not talk to him for two months, three months, six months sometimes. And so that's a good example of that's what a free mentor would be. I'm like, yeah, he's my friend. We're good friends. I could call him and say, hey, let's go get coffee and we can chat. And I'll definitely learn some stuff from him.

Starting point is 00:13:01 He'll probably learn some stuff from me. But we're not talking to it. There's no consistent cadence of us talking all the time. So that's kind of like what a free mentor is. A paid mentor is really great as well. I just honestly prefer paid mentors because if somebody is worth it as a coach, they should feel if they're a good person that they are obligated to help you succeed. There's an energetic exchange. I'm paying you money. You have agreed to help me succeed in

Starting point is 00:13:31 this one thing. So in many ways, I think that it's better. Another thing that really helps as well is that usually you're going to talk every single week. A good mentor, coach, whatever it might be that you have, you should be seeing each other on a very regular cadence. What's good about that is that you're seeing each other quite often. And with that, they should be holding you accountable too. You know, your success in many ways is their obligation. And so they should feel responsible for your success. And they should have the opportunity to call you out when you don't do what you're going to, you say you're going to do. A lot of times what's really interesting about people is we will, we will want to succeed or want to do what needs to be done simply because other people are watching us or because we know that our mentors

Starting point is 00:14:14 or our coach are going to be checking us. We're like, oh my God, I said I was going to do this thing. I better get it done. Otherwise I look like an idiot. So what it really comes down to, and I think that's super important is like, first off, what do you want? What do you want in your life? I think that's the thing that a lot of people really need to get clear on is you might be listening to me and you're like, that's cool. Like, what do I get a mentor for? Well, it depends on what it is that you want.

Starting point is 00:14:33 What do you want in your life? Do you want to get better at running a business? Is there a specific niche that you're in or niche, depending on how you speak that you're in that you want to get better at? Is there somebody in the world who teaches that, who has the level of success that you want, that you can just pay to help you get there? There's massive ROI in that. Is there somebody who's in a great relationship or they're a relationship coach or they are a relationship therapist? They can help you with that. That's someone that you can go find. Is there somebody

Starting point is 00:15:04 who is a, you know, there's a sport you want to get better at. There's someone that's really good in your area. Can you pay them and say, Hey, can I take lessons from you? Can you take lessons? So you do sessions, all of that. So I think the first thing is like, get really clear on what it is that you want to improve at. Like if you were to say, this is the number one thing over the next six months that I want to improve at. What is that thing? Get really clear on what that thing is and then say, is there somebody else in my area that teaches this? Is there someone that I'm aware of? Or is there someone that's in my area? And so that's a really important thing to start to think about. You can go on to Google and you can Google it. You can go on to, you know,

Starting point is 00:15:39 if it's something even as like, you're like, I want to get better at tennis. There's an app that I've used many times called Thumbtack. And it used to just be made for people who were like trying to find plumbers and trying to find air conditioning people and all that stuff. Now you can type in like tennis lessons and it'll pop up and you can see if there's someone there. Maybe if you want to get better at a language, Spanish lessons, you could type in Spanish and somebody will come to your house and teach you Spanish or do it virtually. And so really what it comes down to is what do you want? And then you've got to search and try to find that. And then if you're asking for like, where would you find a free mentor? You've got to ask yourself, where would that mentor hang out?

Starting point is 00:16:10 Put yourself in the location where they might be. Like, for instance, if you're, the way I always like to think about this is kind of like dating, right? If you were single and you're really into being extremely healthy, you're very health conscious and you're single and you're trying to find extremely healthy, you're very health conscious, and you're single and you're trying to find somebody else who is also the same as you, who's very health conscious, you're probably not going to try to go find that person at the bar if you're not somebody who really drinks, because you're going to find somebody at the bar who drinks. Where would you

Starting point is 00:16:38 go if you wanted to find somebody to date that was very health conscious like you? You might go to Whole Foods. You might go to yoga classes. You might go to Whole Foods. You might go to yoga classes. You might go to the gym. You might go to group fitness classes. And you're going to put yourself in the area where that potential partner could be. It's the exact same thing for mentors. It might take you some time, but like, where would my mentor hang out that teaches me how to do this thing? And you've got to put yourself in those places to start to find those people. So that is the importance of having a mentor. I can't stress enough how worth it is to have free mentors, paid mentors, because ultimately they will collapse time and help you get to success in whatever it is that you want to be successful in much, much quicker. So that's what

Starting point is 00:17:18 I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram stories, tag me in it, Rob Dial Jr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. And with that, I'm going to leave it the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.

The Mindset Mentor - The Power of Mentorship

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