The Mindset Mentor - What Will They Say When You Die?

Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. And if you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so that you never miss another podcast episode. And if you're out there and you love this podcast and you want to get some extra tips and tricks on how to improve your life and how to improve your mindset, I send an email out every single Monday morning called Monday Email. You go to mondayemail.com right now, and it's absolutely free. I'll send you in your inbox some tips and tricks to how to improve your life and also your mindset. Once again, it is mondayemail.com. Today, we're going to be talking about your legacy and what people are going to say about you when you die. Don't worry, this isn't going to be a morbid

Starting point is 00:00:43 episode, but what I really want to do is start to open you up to thinking about your life, what you do on a daily basis, and what's going to happen after you're done. I want to talk about your legacy and I want to talk about the life that you're going to leave when you are done here. And so I hear this quote, one of my favorite quotes is they say that you die twice. Once is when you stop breathing. And the second time is a little bit later on when somebody says your name for the last time. So let me say that again. You die twice. Once is when you stop breathing. And the second time is when someone says your name for the last time. The real question is between the first death and the second death, between when you stop

Starting point is 00:01:25 breathing and the last time somebody says your name, what is going to be said about you? What are people going to say? At your funeral, what are people going to say about you? And so we all want to feel like we're getting something from our lives. Deep down inside, every single person listening to this episode, you would not be listening to this podcast if you didn't feel like you wanted something to come from your life. We want to make our lives mean something. But all too often, on a day-to-day basis, we get busy and we lose focus on that and we just try to

Starting point is 00:01:57 get things done throughout the day versus actually making our lives meaningful. All too often, we focus on our own needs instead of the needs of others, instead of the needs of the world, instead of the needs of our community of how we can leave this world a better place. And so I'm going to go through a few different aspects of how I think we can all make the world a better place. They're really not hard. They really don't require a whole lot of time. What it takes, as most people know, is these things don't take time, they take intention. And all too often, we're just not being intentional with our day, with our life, and with the legacy that we want to leave. And the new billionaire, as they say, is not someone who's just worth a billion dollars,

Starting point is 00:02:37 but the new billionaire is someone who can create a way to positively affect a billion people. And so a lot of people run after money just for money's sake, instead of thinking, how can I help people? And if you can figure out a way to help a billion people, there is no way on this earth that you will be broke. There's no way. So you can make money by chasing money, or you can make money by actually trying to change the world and help people. And the reason why I say that is it will come back. I believe in the way that I've run this podcast and my business and everything, I believe that money is just a byproduct of the value that

Starting point is 00:03:15 you give the world. If you give the world more value and more value and more value, somehow money is going to come in. I think money is just the energetic exchange between you and the universe. And it's kind of like the breadcrumbs that the universe can leave you of saying, hey, hey man, you're on the right track. And so all too often we get caught up in having to go to our jobs, having to work the day-to-day because we have to pay our bills, because we have to feed our families, because we have to be able to survive. But we're focused on the money instead of focusing on the purpose, instead of focusing on how we can actually put more good into the world. And so I want to ask you a question before we dive deep into it is what is the legacy that you want to leave here? Have you ever actually thought about

Starting point is 00:03:53 that? Between the first death, when you stopped breathing, and the second death, the last time somebody says your name, because there will be a moment in time where your name will never be said again. There will be. What's the legacy that you want to leave here? Have you ever thought about that? Have you ever like really given time and attention and intention to what you want your legacy to be when you leave here? And I mean like, not just thought about it. Thinking about it's great. I want you to think about the legacy that you want to leave. But what I want you to do more than anything else besides just thinking about it is I want you to put it down on pen and paper, like put down. Why the fuck am I alive? Like, why am I here? Am I just chasing money? Am I just

Starting point is 00:04:33 chasing pleasures? Or am I trying to do something to make the human experience for every human that I can better? According to what I think and the way that I try to drive myself is I think that this should be like our number one individual endeavor. Years ago, like before I started this podcast, before 2015 when I started it, I did some cool things. I made some money, all of that stuff, but there was a part of me, especially towards the end when I finally left the last job I was working at, I was at the point where I was starting to go into like a mini depression because my existence felt very hollow. I was like, I'm just working to just pay bills, be able to do some cool shit every once in a while, and then die. That doesn't feel fulfilling to me. It doesn't make me fired up and excited to get out of bed and go do something. And I was working for a recruiting company and I was doing sales for

Starting point is 00:05:30 a recruiting company. And I was like, all I'm doing is making these massive corporations that are just this figment of our imagination. Like somebody just made this corporation up one day and I'm just making them more money. I'm just making them more digits in their bank account. That doesn't feel fulfilling. It doesn't feel like I'm actually helping people in any sort of way. And so I'm just making them more money. I'm just making them more digits in their bank account. That doesn't feel fulfilling. It doesn't feel like I'm actually helping people in any sort of way. And so I'm gonna break down a couple of different ways where you can impact and leave a lasting legacy. And so I'm gonna go through a couple of different aspects

Starting point is 00:05:56 of it and I want you to write down and think of whichever one hit home for you the most, okay? The first thing that I think about, because I know a lot of people listen to this podcast and the most intimate way to impact the world is your children. First, these are the closest people to you and the closest people to make a big impact on. If you do nothing else in this world, but put all of your effort into raising incredible children, I think that it's time well spent.

Starting point is 00:06:29 Laura and I had a conversation, my fiance had a conversation about two days ago, and we were talking about how, for some reason, like being a stay-at-home mom or a stay-at-home dad is almost seen as like not as good as running a successful company in society. Like if you see somebody who's praised, it's usually not mothers and fathers. It's usually like, oh, look at this CEO that made billions of dollars doing this thing. That's fine. But why is it not praised to really raise incredible children, to be the best parents you could be, to research and learn and put all of your effort and your spare time into making sure you're bringing in the best children as possible? Like, think about this for a second. What if every single parent on this earth put all of their time and attention whenever they had a free moment, maybe outside of their job, maybe

Starting point is 00:07:13 outside of everything that they do, their free time into going, I'm going to raise the best possible children that I can. That would probably fix almost all of the world's problems alone. Not by going, hey, I want to make sure that my children are the best entrepreneurs or the best students that they could be, but the best people that they could be. And so one thing that I think that we should focus on is how can we make sure that with you, if you are a parent or if you want to be a parent, that you are raising the best possible children that you can. That alone should be the endeavor that all of us really try to work towards. How can I raise the best possible children that you can. That alone should be the endeavor that all of us really

Starting point is 00:07:45 try to work towards. How can I raise the best possible children I can? If you don't have children, whenever you are around children, how can you be the light of this world to actually show them the example of what somebody could and should be? That should be something that we should all focus on right there. And so the thing that I want to bring into your mind is if you have children, if you are a stay-at-home mom, if you are a stay-at-home dad, that's the most important job that you have and will ever have. And so how can you become even better at it and put more time and attention into it as well? I know sometimes you get home from work and the kids are crazy. You don't have a whole lot of energy. If you can just take a little bit more time and attention into them, it will cause a massive, massive impact on the world. So that's the first

Starting point is 00:08:30 thing I think about. The next thing I think about is your community. You don't have to go and change the entire world and feel like there's this huge, you know, there's 8 billion people in the world, I have to change all of them. No, no, no. What if you just focus on the community, just the city that you live in, just the village that you live in, just the town that you live in? How can you think about how you can do better, whether it's giving back? And if you don't have time, I'm sorry, if you don't have money, you could always try to give back and help with time, especially this time of year. Like how can you try to help people as much as you possibly can? And if you do have children, take your children to show how you help people. One of the biggest things that ever happened to me in my life, I remember one year, my father

Starting point is 00:09:10 didn't have any money to give us Christmas gifts after my parents were divorced. And what we did was we woke up and we went to the Salvation Army and we went to all of these people. We didn't have much money. We were poor. I didn't get Christmas gifts from him. I got Christmas gifts from my mom, but it wasn't like we had much, but I was able to see other people who didn't have as much as us. So it put my life in a perspective. I was probably nine, 10, 11 years old. I remember specifically giving, it wasn't mine, but I gave a bike, brand new bike to a little girl and like what her face looked like when we were able to give it to her. And so it's like, can you just donate your time into helping people and taking your children to see you helping people and taking your children, your children will then grow up and want to help

Starting point is 00:09:52 people as well. And so how can you help people more? How can you help people in the community? Another thing that's popped in my head as I'm saying this story as well, like, were there some bad times in my life with my father? Sure. There definitely were, but there were also some really light times as well. I remember one time there was a guy that was on the side of the road in his car, something was wrong with his car. I can't remember exactly what it was, but my dad pulled over, helped him with it. I remember seeing the guy, my dad did not have any money, but I remember seeing the guy feeling so thankful for my dad pulling over and helping him that he tried to give him $20. And my dad was like, no, no, no. And he got

Starting point is 00:10:25 back in the car and I said, I was probably 10, 11, 12. And once again, I remember being like, dad, did that guy try to give you money? And he's like, yeah. And I go, why didn't you take it? Cause I'm a little kid. I'm like, go get that money. Um, and so he's like, I didn't take it because I told him I would rather prefer him do something for somebody else today versus me taking his money. And I was like, oh, that's a good way to grow up and to be the type of person you want to be. And so those are just two life events that I remember happening in my childhood that made me go, my dad's giving back. Like, I want to give back in some sort of way. And so can you give

Starting point is 00:11:00 back in your community? If you have children, can you take your children to help them give back in the community as well and start to instill that in them? So that's the next thing I keep thinking about is your community. Hey, today's program is brought to you by Athletic Greens, the health and wellness company that makes comprehensive daily nutrition really, really simple. AG1 by Athletic Greens is a category leading superfood product that brings comprehensive and daily nutrition to everybody. Because keeping up with the research, knowing what to do, and taking a bunch of pills and capsules is hard on the stomach and hard to keep up with. So to help each of us be at our best, they simplify the path to better nutrition by giving

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Starting point is 00:12:10 control of your health and give AG1 a try. The next thing to think about is your profession. How many people listening and be honest are waking up and going to work and doing something that maybe doesn't fully fulfill you. Maybe you don't hate your job, but you're just doing it, right? You're just doing the job because you need to pay your bills. How many people are just chasing money? A lot. And I want to tell you this,

Starting point is 00:12:36 of course you have to pay your bills. Of course you have to provide for your family. But if you don't enjoy what you do, it doesn't always have to be that way. You don't have to work a job that you don't enjoy what you do, it doesn't always have to be that way. You don't have to work a job that you don't enjoy. Sure, could it take a year or two years to find a job that's more fulfilling, that helps, that makes you feel like you're doing something for the world? Of course. And for those of you that raise children, if they see you waking up and going to a job that you hate and working there and coming back tired and complaining, they're going to see you and go, oh, this is what the world's

Starting point is 00:13:08 supposed to be. I'm supposed to get a job that I don't enjoy, that tires me just so I can get by. Most people want their children's life to be better than their life was. And if we keep doing the same thing over and over again, as Einstein says, that's the definition of insanity. You're going to be raising your children to do the exact same thing as well. Your children deserve to see a parent that feels fulfilled with whatever it is they're doing. Can you find something that feels more fulfilling that you can put more passion into and you actually help the world as well? Maybe,

Starting point is 00:13:38 in some way, even if it's just a small thing. Can you figure out a way to do that? And it, you know, like I said, it doesn't have to be this way forever. It might be this way now that you have this job that you don't like, but it doesn't have to be this way in the future. Can you create some sort of plan and figure out what is that you want to do and how to transition over there? Whether it's six months from now, a year from now, two years from now, come up with a plan of how you can actually do something that feels a little bit more fulfilling to you. So that's the next thing I think about is your profession. Next thing I think about is dedicating your life in some sort of way, your fun time to some sort of hobby and improving at that hobby. Becoming the best that you can be at something. Trying to strive for mastery in some sort of way. It could be a business,

Starting point is 00:14:22 it could be a hobby, but when you try to get better at something, you're helping humanity move forward in whatever it is that you love doing. So like an example that I can think about, if we go back to like the Renaissance era, I love Italy. I spent a lot of time in Italy. There's so much Renaissance art and there's so much like Renaissance changed Italy and changed the world. These are people who loved doing art, doing architecture. Like that was what they loved. And in turn, a lot of people doing what they loved made that they got better at it. They got better at it.

Starting point is 00:14:53 They got better at it. And they created mastery, which then made people see that there was another level on top of what they thought was possible. There was another level of art. There's another level of architecture. There's another level of color. And so when we find a hobby, something that we love and we want to improve it and we want to try to strive towards mastery, it makes us feel like there's more in this world that we can actually work for. It inspires other people around us and it shows

Starting point is 00:15:19 that there's another level that people can get to and inspires other people when they see you getting to that level. And so can you find a hobby or something that you love that you want to put your time and attention into? And the last thing I think about that will really help change the world and leave an amazing legacy for you after you die is just to be kind. Like just be kinder to people. There's a quote that I love that says, everyone that you meet is fighting a battle that you know nothing about. There's so many people that you think of like Robin Williams, that the happiest, funniest people are actually struggling deep down inside. And you don't see that. And sometimes all they need is just someone to be more kind to them.

Starting point is 00:16:04 You know, sometimes all they need is just someone to be more kind to them. You know, sometimes all they need is just someone to reach out to them. I remember hearing a story of a lady and I saw this post. She was walking into Dunkin' Donuts and there was a homeless guy that was on, that was, you know, outside of it. And instead of just walking past her, I'm sorry, walking past him and acting like he didn't exist or act like he didn't see her, it was, you know, towards Christmas time. And she walked over to him and she's like, Hey, what's your name? And he's like, Oh, my name is, you know, Tim, whatever it was. And she's like, Hey, Tim, how are you today? And he's like, Oh, I'm doing okay. Whatever it is. And, um, she started, she talked to him for a

Starting point is 00:16:38 few minutes. Right. And she's like, well, I'm going to go get coffee. Like, do you want a coffee or something? Like, are you hungry? Do you want me to get you like a bagel? She talked to him for like three or four minutes. That was it. And he's like, yeah, that'd be really nice. And so she goes inside, gets her stuff, puts it on the table and ends up getting him a bagel and getting him some coffee and stuff. Coming back out and having a couple more minute conversation with him and just giving him

Starting point is 00:17:01 kindness, making him feel seen, talking to him, recognizing him as another sentient being that has feelings and has gone through good and bad in the world. They talked for like five minutes total. And then she's like, okay, I got to get back to work. I came here to get some stuff done. So she goes back in, they part ways. She goes back into the Dunkin' Donuts and she works for about an hour or so. And then she comes back out and there's a note on her car. And it was a note from the homeless man. And it said, thank you so much for your kindness today. I was considering killing myself tonight, but because of your kindness, I see that there's more hope for me in this world. She had a quick few minute conversation with this man and through that kindness made him decide not to kill himself.

Starting point is 00:17:46 And so everyone that we meet is fighting about that we know nothing about. And it also brings me back to like the Maya Angelou quote where she says, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. How can we just be kinder and make people feel better, feel more seen? And that's the reason somebody asked me this a few weeks ago of like, why do you end every single podcast episode with make it your mission to make somebody else's day better? It's because I truly believe that if every single person, there's hundreds of thousands of people listening to each podcast episode, imagine what good would come if all of the people, 300,000 people decided to do one thing for someone else today and how that could start to spread.

Starting point is 00:18:25 That's why I think it's important for us to do that. And for us to, it doesn't have to be a big gesture. It'd be something super small. How can we do that? And so the reason why I wanted to go over this podcast episode is so you can start to think about the legacy that you're going to leave when you end up leaving here. You know, don't worry about making millions of dollars and having millions of dollars in your bank account when you die. Be as good of a person as possible so that when you die, there's not enough room inside of the funeral home for you because people show up. I remember I was really inspired when I went to one of my ex-girlfriend's father's funerals like six, seven years ago, and it was full. And I was like, man, that's really inspiring. Like

Starting point is 00:19:03 this guy didn't have a whole lot, but he was an amazing human and he impacted so many other people's lives. And so you don't want to have hundreds of people at your funeral just for yourself and be like, oh, look at how many people showed up to my funeral. Cause you'll be dead anyways. Won't matter in the first place. But really like, how can I know that, that I did as much as I could, that I had the right habits, traits, qualities, and then I added as much kindness and love to this earth as I possibly could, because that's really what people need more than anything else. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on your Instagram stories and tag me in it, Rob Dial Jr, R-O-B-D-I-A-L-J-R. And now you know, I'm going to leave you the same way I leave you every single

Starting point is 00:19:42 episode, make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you. There's a ton of people that are listening right now. Go out and just do one small, great deed for somebody else. And I'll see you guys in the next one.

The Mindset Mentor - What Will They Say When You Die?

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