The Moth - The Moth Radio Hour: Unexpected Community
Episode Date: January 23, 2024In this hour, stories of finding your people—on the basketball court, behind the bar, or on the street. This episode is hosted by Moth Director Chloe Salmon. The Moth Radio Hour is produced... by The Moth and Jay Allison of Atlantic Public Media. Storytellers: At the age of 50, Harwood Taylor returns to basketball with a new team. Julia Cadieux's college bartending job isn't what she expected. Sandra Kwawu finds comfort in a celebration with her friends and family. When Jose Faus is commissioned to paint a mural, he finds inspiration all around him.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
From PRX, this is the Moth Radio Hour.
I'm your host, Chloe Salmon.
Living in a city as big and busy as New York, I see hundreds of people a day who I know
I'll never set
eyes on again.
Most of the time we pass each other by without a second thought, but sometimes I'll find
a meaningful connection where I least expect it.
The construction worker who saw me standing in tears next to my bookcase that was too
large to fit through my new building store and offered to cut it down on the spot with his power saw.
The woman who gave me her umbrella during a downpour
when she saw that mine had broken.
The man who stole my wallet and I kid you not,
promptly returned it to me upon seeing how pathetic
and soul weary I looked after an exhausting night at work.
Even though I'll probably never see any of those folks again, the brief moments we shared made an impact on me.
And in this big and busy city, I think of them as friends.
In this episode, stories of unexpected communities
and the people who make them,
whether they're in our lives for a second or a season.
Our first story is from Harwood Taylor, who told it at a story slam in Houston where we
partner with public radio station HPM.
A note that this story contains a mention of suicide.
Here's Harwood live at the mall.
So I love basketball, and I've loved it since I was 13 and I was a sane-ans fighting shamrock.
We were the fiercest greenery in all of Houston.
I've loved basketball through my teens, my 20s, my 30s.
Around my mid-30s, I was playing in outdoor city parks and I noticed that the guys and girls that were playing
ball, they were faster, stronger than me, and I started to get hurt.
And I thought, well, it's time to put the basketball down.
So I put it down.
Well, four years ago, four years ago I was 50, I hit the jackpot.
I'm standing in line.
There's a free movie, Miles Davis preview thing with the party,
and the guy I'm standing in line with, I strike up a conversation with, I said, what do you
do for fun?
He says, I play basketball.
I immediately size him up, I'm like, this guy's 10 years older than me.
10 years older than me.
I said, with who?
He says, with a bunch of guys around my age, our kids all went to the same school and we
used the gym.
Well, in my head, I'm already playing with them. I it's a full court it's wooden it's air-conditioned
full court I'm like y'all play full-court basketball guys your age he says and
older I said you know that's the kind of group I feel like I could be really
competitive with he says you're welcome to come anytime I've been going every
week for the last four years twice a a week, and I absolutely am having
a ball.
Communication is critical in basketball.
When you're younger, it's the difference between having a good team and a bad team,
and without going into semantics and some talk about what that is.
One thing is a pick.
When you're playing as a young person, you want to win.
When you're playing as a 50-year-old person or a 54-year-old person, I play carefully.
And I play in a way that I can play again.
Right.
So this guy is supposed to call out a pick.
And calling out a pick is just saying, you know, Harwood left, left pick or something
like that.
I didn't hear that. And what that means is I'm about to run into somebody
kind of full speed.
And when I ran into this guy,
he just caught me right under my rib cage
and it pushed all the air out of my lungs.
And in my 20s, I'd have been cool.
I'd have choked a little bit.
I'd have been back on the court,
probably played for another hour.
They're like, you okay?
And I'm like, nope, not okay.
Done, done tonight. I was
done that night. I was done for another week. Chiropractor six weeks later. I'm back on
the court. I walk in and I see this new guy. And I'm like, you know, I'm going to say hi
to this guy because when I was new, people said hi to me. And as I'm walking up to him, he just looks like the weight of the world is on him.
And I know depression.
I've fought it myself.
And as I'm getting closer, I'm like, wow, he has that don't F with me body language.
And the last thought I had was he probably is the kind of guy no one approaches.
So for all those reasons, I said, hi, I'm Harwood.
I hadn't seen you here before.
I just thought I'd introduce myself.
And he says, you know, actually my kids went here.
I'm not new.
I just hadn't played in 10 years and just came back.
And so everything he's saying, by the way,
is so slow and heavy.
And I'm like, well, what do you do outside of basketball?
He says, well, I used to have a business.
I just sold it. So I'm still trying to lift him up. I'm like, you just sold your you do outside of basketball? He says, well, I used to have a business. I just sold it.
So I'm still trying to lift him up.
I'm like, you just sold your business.
That's a good thing, right?
He said, yeah, this is a good thing.
I said, what are you gonna do now?
He said, that's part of the problem.
I really don't know.
I said, well, you're gonna play basketball.
And he smiles and he said, yeah,
I'm gonna play basketball tonight.
I don't remember anything else about that night, you know?
Two weeks later I get
the regular email from Mike and he says, you know, game is on tonight. He's just telling
us because there's not going to be a PTA meeting or a school player or something, chairs on
the basketball court. And if you're coming tonight, come early, I want to make an announcement.
So we show up early. He gathers everybody at center court and he says, I didn't want to send this in an email.
He says, Steve committed suicide.
I didn't know this guy.
And he said, listen, I know we're just playing basketball here,
but I want you to know if there's something going on with you, you can talk to me.
And from now on, when I send these emails out, I'm going to send them so you can see
everybody's email.
We need to be able to reach each other.
And it changed me.
I'm busy like everybody, you know, and we finish late and guys would ask that I don't
know to go to dinner or something like that.
I always said no. I say yes now.
And last night I was playing with these guys and Mike's one of the guys, the guy that sends the email out.
He's one of the older guys. He's 65, I think.
And it used to anger me because they don't warm up and I'm like, dude, you're twice as old as I am.
You need to warm up. you're going to get hurt.
And they're just shooting, you know, just shooting this shit.
They should be shooting around.
They're just talking.
And then, you know, I thought, well, maybe that's why they come.
And maybe that's the most important part.
Thank you. Parwood Taylor is the gallery director of Elio Fine Art in Houston. He still plays basketball
with those same men and has lost count of the number of pick-up games they've played
together. He says that he's found a lot of beauty in seeing everyone's lives unfold in
increments
over the course of the last decade, simply through their love of basketball and the
community they share by continuing to show up for each other week after week.
If you or someone you know needs help, the Suicide Crisis Lifeline is free, confidential,
and available 24-7.
You can reach it by dialing 988.
To see a picture of Harwood and the guys in action, head over to themoth.org. Next up is Julia Khaju.
She told this story in Troy, New York, where we partnered with Troy Savings Bank Music
Hall.
Here's Julia.
When I was 21, I was living with my older sister in Montreal and attending McGill University. For those of you that
don't know, Montreal is a French-speaking city in Canada where I'm from.
And I was really drawn to Montreal because you know it has this European
vibe and I was hoping that some of that would maybe rub off on me because I had big dreams of living a fabulous French life.
I had made the decision to live with my older sister
because I think I'd seen too many American movies
about college frat parties and binge drinking
and I just sensed that that wasn't for me.
But the unfortunate result of that decision
was that I hadn't for me, but the unfortunate result of that decision was that I hadn't
really made any friends and I was pretty cut off from campus social life.
So instead of going to really any parties at all, my life consisted of going to school,
going home to study, and the highlight of my week was watching Dawson's Creek on Friday nights with my sister.
And like most college kids, I was broke, and I needed a job.
So I had an older brother living in the city,
and he was leaving his position, and he said that I could just
take over for him. And it didn't said that I could just take over for him.
And it didn't matter that I had no skills and no experience.
And this is the only time in my life when nepotism has worked for me.
So that's how I came to be the newest, coolest bartender at the Manoir West Mount, a retirement home for well-to-do seniors.
So this bar, and I use that term loosely, was only open three days a week and only from 4 p.m. to 6 p.m. And I know some of you might be
questioning, you know, is it okay to get the elderly intoxicated? But remember this is
Montreal and there's two things you'll never take away from the French, booze and cigarettes, not at any age, but still it was probably a good thing that management had a strict
two drink max policy.
So I would arrive for my shift at around 3.30 and that was the queue for all the seniors
to go upstairs and dress for dinner.
So they would go up in their leisure suits and they would come down just dressed to the
nines.
You know, the gentleman would be in their dress pants and their colored shirts and their
suit jackets and the ladies would be in heels, stockings, skirts and dresses.
And for the most part, you know, the drink orders were very simple.
Johnny Walker for the men,
and a dainty glass of sherry for the ladies.
I liked the job.
It was really easy, you know,
it required very little of me. I could show up, pour a few drinks, make
a few pleasantries, and then, you know, my patrons would take their drinks to the tables
around the dining hall, and they would sit together and drink together, and I would just
sit back at the bar and watch. And, you know And it kind of felt like just watching a TV show,
like the least dramatic reality show imaginable.
But a few months into the job, a new resident showed up.
And her name was Margaret.
And I could tell that Margaret was different
right from the beginning. That first day when Margaret came to the bar I noticed
that she was not dressed like the other women. Margaret was wearing loafers,
slacks, a blouse, and a stiff cardigan that looked like a suit jacket. Margaret hopped up on the bar stool,
spread her legs real wide under the counter,
and just made herself at home.
She looked very comfortable on a bar stool.
And she watched while I poured a few glasses of sherry
for the other women, and then when it was her turn,
she looked at me and she said, I'll have a gin martini, very dry, shaken, two olives.
Did I mention I had zero bartending experience? Up until this point, the most complicated thing I'd ever done to a drink was put ice
in it.
So Margaret clocked the fear in my eyes in a second.
She hopped off the bar stool, came round to my side, started shuffling through the bottles.
She found the gin, she found vermouth, a cocktail shaker, everything.
And she proceeded to show me very quickly how to make the perfect
gin martini. When she was done, she went back around to the other side, hopped back on the
bar stool, and proceeded to drink her drink. And I felt very uneasy because none of the
other residents had ever done this. They would always take their drinks and go away.
But Margaret stayed.
So as Margaret and I made small talk that first afternoon,
I felt myself sort of being pulled uncomfortably
from the sidelines.
I quickly discovered that Margaret
had a naughty sense of humor.
One day, while sipping her martini, she asked me,
did you ever hear what Dorothy Parker said about martinis?
Now, at this point in time, I had a vague idea
of who Dorothy Parker was, but I needed to go home
and do a Google search.
So in case you don't know, Dorothy Parker
was a writer,
intellectual, humorist, working in the 20s, 30s, and 40s. She was like a real it
girl of her time. So Margaret asked me, have you ever heard what Dorothy Parker
said about martinis? And I said, no Margaret, what? I like to have a martini.
Two at the very most.
Three, I'm under the table.
And four, I'm under my host.
Margaret burst out laughing.
And I joined her.
From that day on, Margaret would repeat this question to me nearly every time
she came to the bar. And every time I would play along and play dumb and say that I'd
never heard it before, and we would always laugh together at the punchline. And I wasn't
too sure if this was our shared inside joke, or if Margaret, like so many of the other residents in the home, was having trouble with her memory.
Because a lot of the people there were showing some early signs of dementia. But Margaret and I would, we'd talk about our lives together and it always seems like the past was easier territory
for Margaret, so that's mainly what we stuck to.
I learned that Margaret had been a professor
at the university where I was studying
and that she'd never married and never had kids.
And she didn't talk about those things
as if they were tragedies.
And I remember thinking, wow, Margaret is a badass.
So life continued on in pretty much the same way.
You know, I was going to school.
I was going to work at the bar.
And I was coming home to study and Dawson's Creek
on Friday nights.
But you know, now it was nearing the end of the school year
and I was feeling restless.
You know, my fabulous French life still hadn't shown up yet.
And I was feeling like I needed to figure out
my signature drink like Margaret and blaze a trail.
But I really didn't know how to make this life that I was imagining happen.
And I was feeling really stuck and frustrated and lonely,
and I didn't really have anybody to talk to about any of it.
So with all of this weighing on me one day, I went to work.
And Margaret came to the bar and she ordered her martini and I just wanted to be left alone
with my bad mood. But of course, Margaret asked me the question, did you ever hear what Dorothy Parker said about martinis? And I just snapped,
yes Margaret, you tell me all the time. And Margaret's face just fell. She looked embarrassed
and sad. And I felt terrible and I wanted to say something in that moment
But I just froze and I didn't say anything
And for the first time Margaret took her martini and she went to sit at a table and she drank alone and
I stayed back at the bar
alone and watching I
Went home that night and I just felt terrible about it. It felt like
maybe I had robbed Margaret of something, like maybe the one moment in her day
where she felt like her old self, just a smart, witty woman having her favorite
drink at the bar and chatting up the cute bartender. And with that one thoughtless remark,
I had turned her into a sad old lady with memory problems.
It made me realize how special Margaret had become to me
for reasons that I couldn't quite put my finger on yet,
but I sensed that it had something to do with catching a glimpse of a person
who had actually lived that fabulous French life that I was only dreaming about.
I knew that I needed to apologize to Margaret, but it was several days until my next shift.
So I waited feeling anxious and nervous. And when the day finally came, I went into
work ready to face Margaret. She came to the bar, ordered her martini. I made it for her.
And just as I was sliding it across the counter to her and getting ready to say I'm sorry.
She looked at me and she said, did you ever hear what Dorothy Parker said about martinis?
And I felt so relieved.
And I took that out.
No Margaret.
What? Margaret, what? And I'm not even sure if that was Margaret's way
of forgiving me or if she simply didn't remember
how I'd snapped at her the week before.
But either way, it was a moment of grace
that I've always been thankful for.
After that, Margaret and I continued as we had before, only now I was really making efforts to be present with her.
I wasn't going to sit on the sidelines anymore. I was going to be with my friend.
So now it was summertime, and I was really feeling ready to take a small step into my life.
So I made the decision to quit the bar job
and look for something a little less geriatric.
I told my boss that I was leaving,
and on my last shift, he announced my departure
to all of the residents.
I said some polite goodbyes, and Margaret I gave a hug and said I'll
miss you. As the new school year began I got a job working at the campus bookstore
and I was hoping that that would help me make some friends and to a degree it
worked. I made friends with my coworkers
and became pretty recognizable to everyone on campus.
And after that, it became harder and harder
to stay on the sidelines.
I would love to be able to say that my fabulous French life
just showed up after that.
But of course, it's taken many, many years and countless small steps to build a life
that I love.
I think meeting Margaret planted a seed in me, and that's why I've never forgotten
her or the Dorothy Parker joke.
I guess I'm just a late bloomer, but I'm happy to say that I am now the sort of woman
who likes to have a martini
to at the very most. Thank you.
That was Julia Ketchu. She's a kindergarten teacher living in Troy, New York with her two
teenagers, an anxious old dog, and an indifferent
cat. If the stars align, she hopes to one day be an eccentric old lady who rides a motorcycle
and adopts senior dogs. I'm sure all with a martinian hand.
Speaking of martinis, Julia confessed that the one and only time she broke the two-drink
Max Rule at Manoir Westmount was for, you guessed it, Margaret.
She finally convinced Julia to pour her just one more,
praised her for her daring,
and then promptly left the martini untouched
so the rule wouldn't really be broken.
After the break, a woman who decides not to celebrate her birthday is in for a surprise when the moth radio hour continues. The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts and
presented by PRX.
This is the Moth Radio Hour from PRX.
I'm Chloe Salmon.
Some of my favorite Moth communities are the audiences at our Open Mic story slams. Slams are a little unpredictable.
No one knows what exactly they're about to hear or who's up next.
That uncertainty can create a spark of camaraderie that catches quickly and, at its best, crackles
up to the storyteller to give them an extra boost of courage when they take the stage.
It's like, for these next two hours, we're all in this together, even though it's likely
we'll never cross paths again.
It's a little bit of magic that each person in the room can carry home with them.
That magic showed up for our next storyteller, Sandra Kwaou, who told her story at a story
slam in Boston where we partner with public radio station WBUR.
Here's Sandra. StorySlam in Boston, where we partner with Public Radio Station WBUR.
Here's Sandra.
Okay.
So I was not expecting to go first.
And also recently I was listening to the podcast and
they said that if your name is picked first, statistically you are less likely to win
tonight.
But that's okay. My heart is beating out of my chest
But I've been bugging my friends all month to be here to tell this story and I'm shaking
But bear with me
June 14th 2007 I love celebrating my birthday. By this particular year, I was very sad.
So on this particular day, I was laying on the ground, looking very the way most of us did look in 2020.
On showered, hair on brush, tangled up,
listening to sad songs, and really basking in misery,
the way teenagers know how to.
And I was home with my siblings,
and my parents gifted me a herd of siblings who are always fighting,
doing something, breaking something, but on this particular day, they must have sense that
I just needed a day to be sad and I needed the house to be quiet because the house was quiet
and none of my siblings were in sight and that never happens. So I'm
there playing the sad song, the same sad songs over and over again. Unfortunately,
I don't remember which ones but yeah I had a few back in the day. So suddenly the
doorbell rings breaking the silence and I was mad. I was like, I just needed a day to be alone and sad and
listen to sad songs. Who dare ring the doorbell? So one of my siblings run to me and
she says, Sandra, Gloria is here. And I'm like, what is Gloria doing here? And well,
I had to go find out. And I go there, I open the door, and there she was, my best friend Gloria
with her sister, Kelly, and she said,
it's your birthday, we're here to celebrate.
And I'm like, I've decided to no longer celebrate my birthday.
Did you not get the memo?
Clearly she did not, because she was at my door
with her sister and she had gifts
in her hands. So I had to let her in. So she was like Sandra you need to get yourself together.
So yeah, so she rushed me. She's like is there anything to eat at the house? I was like no,
Saturdays is typically when my grandmother brings in this food and all
this stuff so we didn't have much so we had some rice and corned beef and I don't
mean the one you eat on San Patis Day I mean the one that's in the can I'm
talking spam it's basically spam so we have rice spam and I think a piece of
yam that we end up frying so we made this rice and after we made all these random food
and we're sitting and eating, I suddenly realized that
not only did we all come together,
my siblings Gloria, Kelly, to make this meal
that suddenly we're all enjoying and having a good time.
And I realized that my birthday is not necessarily about me.
It is about me.
I am the focal point of my birthday,
but my birthday is about the people in my life.
Now I have to backtrack the story to explain to you all
why I decided not to celebrate my birthday
when I turned 16.
You see, my mom died the month I turned 15 and that shattered me.
Like I no longer felt safe in the world and the world became a place that I was in but
I was out of.
And for that reason I felt like my life was basically worthless because the one person
that gave meaning to my life was my mom and she was taken away and I never
saw it come. It was like I was blindsided. I was hit by a truck full of glass and all that glass
was inside of me but I got to go on and show up in the world and I had no hope left. No joy, no hope. I just had to go through the motions of my
life and that's why I felt like my birthday was no longer worth being celebrated. And
what happened that day is that Gloria showing up to celebrate my birthday gave me hope. Hope when I had none. She ignited a light that was very dimmed and it was just a
tiny little light at that time but over time it really carried me through and I
also realized that while we were sitting there eating
this cheapest meal you could eat on your birthday,
I realized that celebrating my birthday is also
celebrating my mom because she gave birth to me.
And my being alive is a testament of her life.
And since then, I've gone on to celebrate my birthday.
And some years are more spectacular than others.
And today is my birthday.
And I'm a chairman, so I'm going to ask you all
to sing me happy birthday, because I have five minutes.
I still have a few minutes.
OK, go on.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you.
Thank you.
Happy birthday to you.
Thank you so much!
That was Sandra Kwa-Woo.
After a decade working in social services,
Sandra switched gears and is currently pursuing her master's in cybersecurity.
She and Gloria are still tight,
even though they aren't always living in the same place.
Every year, Gloria sings her happy birthday via voice message.
Sandra also does her best to make her own birthday special.
One year, she took a solo trip to Iceland,
and another, she walked 30 miles to celebrate entering her 30s.
That night, she told her story.
She had decided last minute to scrap her fancy dinner plans
and asked her friends to join her at the Slam Instead.
The theme was birthdays, after all.
Her name was the first one pulled out of the hat,
and the rest is birthday history.
To see a photo of Sandra and Gloria together,
head over to themoth.org.
In a moment, an artist becomes a part of the block after starting to paint a community
mural. The Roth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts,
and presented by PRX. This is the Moth Radio Hour from PRX.
I'm Chloe Salmon.
In this episode, we've been listening to stories of the connections we find where we least expect them.
Our final story comes to us from Jose Faust, who told it at the Folly Theatre in Kansas City,
where we partnered with Public Radio Station KCUR.
Here's Jose.
A few years ago, I was commissioned to paint a mural at a busy intersection at a kind of
a dicey neighborhood, let's say.
It's a part of the city that I've known very well.
But it's one of those things where you think about
marginalized communities.
There's a lot of crime, neglect, it's chronic.
The wall was constantly vandalized
with graffiti, bad, vile. The owner would come out and slap paint on it, cover it up.
He didn't care what color he had.
Sometimes the cure was worse than the disease.
This part of Kansas City is called the Old Northeast.
You know, it's kind of like the gateway for immigrants and refugees from all over the world.
And like many mixed communities, it endures the neglect of city officials, planners, financial
institutions, and people who give up and turn their backs, close themselves up in their
house. But it's a community vibrant,
full of people who get up every morning,
go to work, put their children to school,
invest in mortgages, pay their debts,
celebrate life and honor death.
In short, they live full lives, full of hope and sacrifice.
I wanted to honor that.
I've worked in that area.
I've had two murals there before.
I also worked as a youth advocate.
And I did interpretations for Medicare, Social Security, and the courts.
I spent a lot of time there.
I felt like I was going to give them a chance to give back to a community I had adopted.
One day we go to the site, sponsors, community stakeholders, and we're taking kind of a
review of it.
So three walls, street level.
And we start talking about what are the things that you could find in common to
celebrate to put up on that wall.
And as we're talking logistics and we're talking about plans, an old man comes running
out of his house that borders one of the walls and he asks, what's going on?
And I tell him, I'm going to be painting a mural on this building over here and I
was thinking maybe I could paint something on your wall on this side and
he was incensed. What do you know he just was troubled. He was convinced that a
mural on that wall was just gonna be an iteration of everything else that
extended on down the sides of the street from him. All the graffiti that was
there visible on every exposed wall.
Over his dead body was somebody going to paint anything on his wall.
And he pointed to the garden full of blooming color and plants.
And he says, that's art.
I was taken aback because I thought I could relate to the old man.
He was an artist and the garden was his canvas.
But I understood his wearingness and reluctantly I told him and promised him I would not paint
anything on that wall.
But I commended him on his flowers.
It was time to start the mural.
It's a brick wall, a surface that I love to paint.
Easy as a cat, right?
But the first week there, I do nothing but scrape,
power wash, tuck point, put brick back in.
I try to patch it the best that I can.
And finally it's done, I prime it.
Then I'm nervous as hell.
Because if there's one big temptation out there
for any bad tagging, it's a wall.
White. Inviting.
Pristine. Come and paint me.
I'm nervous that night, but I get there real early, and the wall is clean and inviting.
I immediately pull out paint, and I start sketching, I start painting, I start claiming it.
We had decided on this idea of painting, I start claiming it.
We had decided on this idea of painting an open-air market.
Those things to me are the greatest gathering places
for people of all nationalities.
You want to know who lives in your town?
Go to an open-air market.
Sit, watch, and listen.
I was going to paint, and actually I started putting in stalls
with fruits and vegetables and plants
And I had people in there selling and buying I
Stood in there one morning by myself and I started sketching these two Somali women on the wall
All of a sudden I hear a gas behind me and I turn around to see this woman coming running out of the store across the street
And she's got a picture in her hand and she's begging me, pleading
me please, can you put me and my sister on the wall and the picture is her and her sister
in their traditional Somali dress and I jump by and I say yes and I take a picture of my
phone.
A few days later I hear a voice.
That's a pretty mural on that wall.
I turn around and I see this young woman sitting on the curve
in front of the Somali store.
Soiled shirt, worn denim,
prayed at the bottom's bare foot.
She tells me about how hard things are
and how nice it is to see something pretty on that wall.
I notice she keeps bending over her hand to her stomach.
I say, you okay? Well, I'll be good. My old man hit me so hard the other day I spent two days in the ICU.
I'm stunned at the ease with which he says it.
I said, maybe you're not so good. Maybe you should go to the hospital. Just said no, I'll be good. I'm just hungry as all. I offer her my lunch and she eats it quietly.
Later after she leaves, I take her features and I draw them on the wall as an Amish woman selling her goods to the Somali sisters.
There are times when you are painting the wall where the heat takes you down. The body just doesn't want to respond.
You want to give up.
Your brain starts to slow down.
You need a kickstart.
In those moments is when I find the personal things I put on that wall.
I had a cat that had rescued from the street
a few years before, ten years before. He had been hit by a car. He died while I
was painting that mural. Now I decided I was gonna put him front and center to be
there for me as I finished this mural. So I put him right in the middle of the
wall. There was Mr. Jones back on the street in the same way that I had found him.
I continued to paint the wall.
Had many beautiful things happen, people have come by. Some people bring me food, give me refreshments,
encouragement, questioning why, what's going on here?
What is this about?
And that kept me going.
There was a point
where you know
the mural is getting done. Up until that point you can change, add, subtract, take anything from it.
But the minute you accept that it's done, it's no longer your wall.
It is the gift that you're giving back to your community.
It is the gift that you're giving back to your community. There's a celebration, an unveiling of the wall.
The cameras gather in the light of the attention.
Important people get up, say, hey, what a great project this is.
I mingle with the people that have captured and put on that wall.
We share refreshments, tell stories.
I accept their appreciation.
I sign the wall.
A few weeks later, I drive by.
And I notice that the neighborhood association has
put these large planters and flowers in them,
and they're sitting adorning the wall, beautifying it.
And as I pass by, I happen to look in my rear-view mirror
and I see the old man, the old man who was convinced
that that mural was going to just create more graffiti,
carrying two large water jugs.
I mention this to somebody.
And they say, yeah, that old man, hell,
he's adopted the wall.
He sits there all day and just makes sure the flowers are good.
He brings out a chair and sits down and watches people going by.
In this belief, I decide to go pay him a visit.
I knock on his door.
He enters and invites me in.
The house smells old, ancient, musty. but it's full of light and I'm surprised.
There's the windows are all open and there's this breeze flowing through.
He begs, he eats up some tea, serves it to me.
We sit in his parlor and he tells me about his life.
He's an immigrant like me.
He's also an artist, a musician.
He played the organ, you know, those kind that you see in symphony halls and big cathedrals.
He pulls out pictures and clippings.
And as we sit there, he starts to tell me about his love of gardening and how important
it is for him and flowers have meant so much to him.
And I can tell because right now in late fall, his yard is a place with color mimicking the
color I put on the wall.
I tell him, I promise him that I'll come back and visit as I leave.
And on the one time that I do come back, he's not there.
But his garden has bloomed so righteous, it's overpowering the colors that I've put on
the wall.
I go by the mural less and less.
And one day I get a franting phone call.
Hey, what happened to your mural?
Not expecting much.
I decide to drive on over there.
And I'm shocked when I find nothing.
The people that owned the building came out and had a guy spray the wall.
It's turned it all gray.
I, there's no explanation.
I decide to go around the corner to talk to the old man,
but as I turn the corner I see his garden is bare.
It's overgrown.
I know he's no longer there.
And I'm pissed.
But then something starts to happen,
something like acceptance.
This whole time that I've been painting this mural,
that I've been thinking that I've been giving this thing
to them like a gift that something has to be shared with and in that pain and in that heat when my body's
just bent over and I can't get up anymore and I'm trying to push myself through.
That was driving me.
But I also began to understand that I give as much as I will receive.
I'm thinking of another wall in another place,
similar dynamics.
I'm standing on a scaffolding and I'm looking down
and he kept a tip jar on the floor for beer and money.
And I notice this man kind of making his way towards the jar.
I come down from the scaffolding, trying to
head him off, protect the jar. But he stops well short of it. He's not even
noticing him. Really? And then he yells at me, what the hell are you doing? I'm
painting a mural. He says, ah hell I know that. But what do you think you're doing?
I don't answer. I'm not sure where the conversation's going.
He looks at me and he says,
nobody's ever cared for us.
Nobody has ever done anything like that for us here.
He walks past me and I notice he's got tears on his eyes.
A few yards down he turns around and he says, thank you brother, thank you
for that. Turns and goes away. And in that moment I realize I was not giving a gift,
I was being given a gift. I believe in the power of art as a catalyst for transformation, but I've come to accept
the impermanence of things.
And even then, I know an unquestionable truth.
Without art, life is barren.
Thank you.
Puse Faust is a visual artist, writer and teacher who explores the role of artists as catalysts
for community building. He was born in Bukaramanga, Colombia and now lives in Kansas City. If
you're ever visiting KC, keep an eye out for his murals.
You can spot them on buildings all over town, and they're pretty spectacular.
Jose kindly took some time to chat with me about the world of mural painting and his
experiences in it.
I've seen some of his murals, they're large pieces that clearly take a lot of time and
effort to complete.
And I was curious about what drives him to keep creating them.
I can only liken it to the first time I really had the experience of how nice it would be
to see art in the street. I was in New York City, I was at the Museum of Modern Art. I
came into a room and right there in front of me was the complete intact Gernica by Pablo Picasso.
And I remember just not even being prepared because I didn't know. I had only seen a small
picture of it in the art books. But here it was in full bloom in the big wall up there, the momma.
And I remember I just slid down with my back against the wall and just sat there looking at it.
And I remember distinctly thinking,
that feeling of surprise,
that's what I would love to see
and you don't have to go to a gallery to see it.
I wanna see that in the street.
And that just reinforced it for me.
Jose was actually in the process of finishing up
a new mural in the town of Peabody, Kansas
when we had our conversation.
When I asked him if his feelings around the bittersweet nature
of finishing a piece of changed over the years,
he had this to say.
No, it is profoundly bittersweet, it literally is,
because I know that sometimes I'm there a month,
sometimes I'm there two, three weeks, it's length, it's time.
And I know that when this is done,
these people, their routines won't be my routine anymore
when you're painting a wall like the one I'm painting right now down in Peabody
there's a lady that walks by every time at 10 o'clock she's on her way to the senior citizen
center and by 1 30 she's walking back to her house which is like right next door behind the
grocery store those rhythms disappear those moments where she'll yell,
Jose, how are you? Or I'll notice her and I'll say, hey Cynthia, how's it going?
Those little moments, they cease to exist. They stop in memory. For the moments I'm painting,
I'm very aware of people's rhythms and routines, right? And it's almost like being brought in
And it's almost like being brought in into a private moment. And I think that's beautiful.
That was Jose Faust.
And that's it for this episode of The Moth Radio Hour.
Thank you to our storytellers for sharing with us and to you for listening.
I hope you'll join us next time.
And that's the story from the Moth.
This episode of the Moth Radio Hour was produced by me, Jay Allison, and Chloe Sammon, who
also hosted and directed a story in the show.
Co-producer is Vicki Merrick, associate producer Emily Couch.
The rest of the Moth's leadership team includes Sarah Haberman, Sarah Austin-Genese, Jennifer
Hickson, Meg Bowles, Kate Tellers, Marina Cluchet, Leanne Gully, Suzanne Rust,
Brandon Grant, Sarah Jane Johnson, and Aldi Casa. Most stories are true, as
remembered and affirmed by the storytellers. Our theme music is by The Drift.
Other music in this hour from Tuba Skinny, Corey Wong and John Batiste, Henry
Mancini, Dickie Nolan, and Victor Wooten. We receive funding from the
National Endowment for the Arts. The Moth Radio Hour is produced by Atlantic
Public Media in Woods Hole, Massachusetts and presented by PRX. For more about our
podcast, for information on pitching us your own story and everything else go to
our website TheMoth.org.